June 29, 2022 • 13 mins
Dear Steve and Shirley, I’m a 29 year old female and I’m an only child and a daddy’s girl. I met a man that is also an only child and we hit it off instantly. He was raised by a single mom and they are the best of friends. The way he treats her lets me know that he is a good man. He has a lot of characteristics of my father and even though he is 5 years younger, he’s got a great career and his own home.....................
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if
you need advice on relationships, on work, sex, parenting, and more,
please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve Harvey FM dot com.
All you have to do is click submit Strawberry Letter.
We could be reading your letter live on the air,
just like we're gonna read this one right here, right now.
And you never know, this one right here could be yours. Yeah,
(00:24):
could buckle up and hold on tight if you got
it for you here it is straw very letter. Thank you, nephew,
Welcome back again. Subject I don't like to share. Dear
Stephen Shirley. I'm a twenty nine year old female and
I'm an only child and a daddy's girl. I met
a man that is also an only child, and we
hit it off instantly. He was raised by a single
(00:46):
mom and they are the best of friends. The way
he treats her let me know that he is a
good man. He has a lot of charteristic characteristics of
my father, and even though he is five years younger,
he's got a great career and his own home. I
love everything about him, but I do have one pet, peeves,
(01:08):
he's way too comfortable too soon with me. We started
being intimate two months after we met. He assumed it
was fine to stay overnight with me. The first time
we had sex. I let him stay because I wanted seconds.
He slept in a pair of my joggers that were
lying on a chair in my room. He's tall and thin,
(01:28):
so they fit, but he didn't even ask first. He
did not have on underwear with my pants, and that
grossed me out. When he left, I threw them away.
From then on, he has made himself at home at
my house, and he's even left a pair of pajama
bottoms so he can be comfortable when he is visiting.
When we're eating, he loves to sample my food without asking,
(01:51):
and he digs into my plate with his nasty fork.
He says he is a sharer, and I have told
him that I am not laying to him that it's
only only child thing, and he is dead set on
changing me. I drink wine and he usually drinks hard liquor. Now,
if he buys me a bottle of wine, he drinks
(02:11):
half of it because he thinks it's cute if we
drink the same thing. He's overstepping all of my boundaries
when it comes to my personal things and my personal space.
The final straw was when he used my bath towel
right after I dry it off with it. Should I
learn to accept this or tell him nicely to knock
it off? I mean, you know, you don't have to
(02:32):
learn to accept anything if you don't want to accept it.
But you were accepting it. I mean initially you didn't
say anything. You talk about it. He's comfortable too soon.
I mean, you guys were intimate two months after you met.
He wanted to stay over. You didn't say anything. Then
you said that was fine because you wanted seconds. Now
(02:54):
you're complaining, saying he's way too comfortable. You guys haven't
known each other that long. One pet peeve you have,
that's a big one. But you've got to tell him
not us. You've told him that you're not a sharer
after he said he was, but he ignored you. He's
trying to change you. So you got to make him understand.
That doesn't have to be a fight or anything like that.
(03:15):
You can do it nicely. You just gotta let him
know that you are serious about your boundaries if you
truly are, or are you making up these rules as
you go along. The things that he does now after
you've slept with him are starting to gross you out.
I mean, I agree with you. Everyone needs privacy, everyone
needs some space. But what's wrong with sitting him down
and telling him, you know, in an adult way, how
(03:37):
you feel. He doesn't sound like he's gonna listen again.
He said, you said he's gonna try to change you,
but he needs to know that you're serious. Now, you
know if you're taking this relationship any further. These are
simple things. I mean, things that he really should have
been learned at home about boundaries, and since he didn't,
just let him know, I mean, you could be nice.
(03:58):
This is even crazier because he said he has his
own house, So why isn't he at his own house?
Have you been to his own house? Have you seen
his own house? Maybe that's the reason he's staying with you.
Maybe his house is a mess. I mean, boundaries are important. Yeah.
I don't think this is anything to fight about or
anything like that. I just think you need to get
(04:18):
it straight with him and let him know how you
really really feel. Steve, I think this relationship needs to end.
I don't think this woman needs to be in a
damn relationship. I see a totally different letter here. I
don't like to share. Well, that's interesting, because ain't that
all the relationship is built around sharing? It's it's you
(04:42):
can't have relationship if you don't like to share, because
the most important thing you're gonna be shying sharing two
most important things you're gonna be sharing is time and space.
And that means somebody else is in your time and
somebody else is in your space. And if you don't
like to share, you got a problem. But I knew
this letter was gonna be a problem by the way
(05:03):
it started. I'm a twenty nine year old female. I'm
an only child and a daddy's girl. I met a
man that is also an only child, and we hit
it off instantly. Well, ain't this about peaches and cream? Right?
If this ain't about to Lottie, dude, if this ain't
about the chicken, meet the rooster? Right here, Lord her Mercy,
(05:25):
what a perfect match. Two only children have joined forces. Well,
the problem is one of these children don't get it.
And the one that don't get it, this lady that
wrote the letter. He was raised by a single mom
and they are the best of friends. Oh, alone. Oh,
I know what that is right there. I know you're
(05:45):
thinking Mama's boy. It could be, but that don't show
up in the letter, but it shows up on some
other stuff. The way he treats her lets me know
that he's a good man. Okay. He's got a lot
of characteristics, got my father, and even though he's five
years younger, he's got a great career. Now you twenty nine,
he twenty four. Lady, This dude ain't all there right now.
(06:11):
But then I got news for you. You ain't even
I love everything about him, but I do have one pet, Peeve,
He's way too comfortable, too soon with me. We started
being intimate two months after we met. He assumed it
was fine to stay overnight with me. The first time
we had sex. I let him stay because I wanted seconds. Okay, Well, okay,
what's problem? He stayed over? You wanted to Okay? Cool.
(06:34):
When I come back, I'm gonna tell you what's wrong
with her? All right, Steve. We'll have part two of
your response coming up at twenty three minutes after the hour.
Today's Strawberry Letters subject is I don't like to share.
I don't. We'll be back Part two right after this,
you're listening Morning show. All right, Steve, come on, let's
(06:56):
recap today's strawberry letter. The subject is I don't like
to share well. I'm gonna be a little bit more
direct this half of the letter. So let me start
the letter by saying I don't like to share well,
and I understand why. So let's begin this letter like this.
This is a twenty nine year old female who is
an only child and a daddy's girl. Right there, you're
(07:18):
dealing with the person where it's about me. It's about me.
I'm an only child. It's about me. Watch how spoiled
and selfish this letter really turns out to be the
man you met. It is five years younger. He's twenty four.
He was raised by a single mom. Day the best
of friends. You can tell he's a good man by
(07:39):
the way he treats his mother. Blah blah blah blah blah.
He got a great career in his own home, twenty four,
with his own home. That's a good hustle, ain't there.
I love everything about him, but I do have one
peebe's too comfortable, too soon with me? Now you all
started being an interment two months after we met, he
assumed it was fine to stay overnight with me the
first time we had second Okay, I let him stay
(08:00):
because I wanted seconds. I let him stay because I
wanted seconds, not the fact that he was caught up
sprung and he wanted to stay. You wanted seconds, and
you let him stay. He slept in the pair of
my jaggers that were lying on a chair my room.
This is where to let her get a little shaken
for him. He slept in the pair of my joggers
(08:22):
that was laying on a chair in my room. He's
tall and thin, so they fit. I'm glad you cleared
that up right there, gaun. I don't know. I ain't
dated w wearhouse wheatpain. No either you dating a little
bit the ass man or you a great big ass
(08:42):
girl who wanted the two. But here y'all in here
wearing each other plans. Now, I don't know how that worked.
I ain't saying what you are, but you know you
need to pull up a little bit. But he didn't
even ask first. He just put them on. He did
not have on to wear it with my pants, So
that gross me out. Wait a minute, didn't you just
(09:04):
sleep with him? Wait a minute, didn't y'all just have sex?
Didn't y'all climb on each other? Now you're mad because
he got some pants on with no draws on. I
don't understand you. How selfish and self senate are you?
He didn't have on the underwear, and that gross FM out.
When he left, I threw him away. Okay, From then on,
(09:27):
he has made himself at home in my house, and
he's even left a pair of pajama bottoms there so
he can be comfortable when he's visited where you threw
weighted jogs. The man needs something. Damn Lisi bought his
own pajamas. You threw the damn joggers. He thought he's
wearing him last time, he'd have been through all the
draws and can't find him nowhere. You then threw them away.
(09:48):
When we're eating, he loves to sample my food without asking,
and he digs into my plate with his nasty fork,
hitting nasty for what. Wasn't y'all kissing? Yes, that nasty
fog that because it's been in his mouth. You ain't
been in his mouth. How did y'all get to the
sex part? Were no kissing? You ain't getting anyone no
(10:11):
warm up. Okay, he says he's a sharer, and I
have told them I am not. That's because you are
only child and your dad's because you're just a selfish,
self cinnate girl. Y'all don't think you understand how relationship works.
I've explained to him that it's an only child thing,
(10:32):
and he's dead set on changes. I drink wine and
he usually drinks hard. Look now, if he buys me
a bottle of wine, he drinks half of it because
he thinks it's cute that we drink the same thing.
Wait a minute, the man buy a battle of wine.
You want that all to yourself too, damn So he
can't buy a wall of wine and see with his
girl half a glass at wine. You don't share that
(10:53):
even because he thinks it's cute if we drink the
same thing, he's overstepping all of my boundary. They you
really don't need anything because it's your way at a
highway when it comes to my personal things, at my
personal space. I just told you top of the letter
to two things in the relationship that you share the
most of his time and space. Now, if you don't
(11:16):
want the man over there and you don't want to
be in a relationship. Just use him for your little
sex toy five years young. He's your little boy toy
and send him a hood. But don't have a man
thinking he in a relationship with you that y'all should
drink wine together and stuff. Really, you want all the
wine to himself. The final stroll was when he used
my bathtile after I dried off with Should I learn
(11:42):
to acceptance or tell him nicely to knock it off.
Here's my answer to this letter. Y'all need to break up.
You don't like sharing. Its hopeless. She don't like sharing nothing.
She don't want to share nothing. She shared her body,
and these are the examples that she's told about. These
are the extreme examples. It's a lot of she don't
(12:03):
like sharing. She told her man she's not a sharing person.
How do you have a relationship and you're not a sharer?
You got to get past this. And now she's comfortable
to a degree. I'm comfortable to sleep with you. I'm
comfortable to share my body with you, But I don't
want you wearing my jog in pains. I don't want
(12:24):
you to be eating off with your nasty for I
get my pants. You know what I mean. You can't
you get in my pants, but you can't wear my pants.
That don't make no damn sense. Yeah, I can stick
my tongue in your mouth. You can stick your tongue
in my mouth, but you can't stick your fork in
my plate. That don't make no damn sense. All right,
(12:48):
all right, she's selfish. I don't get it. You know,
the dude, he's twenty four. You're a kid. I think
it's a boundary issue. All right. Please leave your comments
on Today's Letter on Instagram at Steve HARVEYSM, and check
out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand. Please up next,
it is Junior with Sports Talk. Right after this, you're
listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show
It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if
you need advice on relationships, on work, sex, parenting, and more,
please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve Harvey FM dot com.
All you have to do is click submit Strawberry Letter.
We could be reading your letter live on the air,
just like we're gonna read this one right here, right now.
And you never know, this one right here could be yours. Yeah,
(00:24):
could buckle up and hold on tight if you got
it for you here it is straw very letter. Thank you, nephew,
Welcome back again. Subject I don't like to share. Dear
Stephen Shirley. I'm a twenty nine year old female and
I'm an only child and a daddy's girl. I met
a man that is also an only child, and we
hit it off instantly. He was raised by a single
(00:46):
mom and they are the best of friends. The way
he treats her let me know that he is a
good man. He has a lot of charteristic characteristics of
my father, and even though he is five years younger,
he's got a great career and his own home. I
love everything about him, but I do have one pet, peeves,
(01:08):
he's way too comfortable too soon with me. We started
being intimate two months after we met. He assumed it
was fine to stay overnight with me. The first time
we had sex. I let him stay because I wanted seconds.
He slept in a pair of my joggers that were
lying on a chair in my room. He's tall and thin,
(01:28):
so they fit, but he didn't even ask first. He
did not have on underwear with my pants, and that
grossed me out. When he left, I threw them away.
From then on, he has made himself at home at
my house, and he's even left a pair of pajama
bottoms so he can be comfortable when he is visiting.
When we're eating, he loves to sample my food without asking,
(01:51):
and he digs into my plate with his nasty fork.
He says he is a sharer, and I have told
him that I am not laying to him that it's
only only child thing, and he is dead set on
changing me. I drink wine and he usually drinks hard liquor. Now,
if he buys me a bottle of wine, he drinks
(02:11):
half of it because he thinks it's cute if we
drink the same thing. He's overstepping all of my boundaries
when it comes to my personal things and my personal space.
The final straw was when he used my bath towel
right after I dry it off with it. Should I
learn to accept this or tell him nicely to knock
it off? I mean, you know, you don't have to
(02:32):
learn to accept anything if you don't want to accept it.
But you were accepting it. I mean initially you didn't
say anything. You talk about it. He's comfortable too soon.
I mean, you guys were intimate two months after you met.
He wanted to stay over. You didn't say anything. Then
you said that was fine because you wanted seconds. Now
(02:54):
you're complaining, saying he's way too comfortable. You guys haven't
known each other that long. One pet peeve you have,
that's a big one. But you've got to tell him
not us. You've told him that you're not a sharer
after he said he was, but he ignored you. He's
trying to change you. So you got to make him understand.
That doesn't have to be a fight or anything like that.
(03:15):
You can do it nicely. You just gotta let him
know that you are serious about your boundaries if you
truly are, or are you making up these rules as
you go along. The things that he does now after
you've slept with him are starting to gross you out.
I mean, I agree with you. Everyone needs privacy, everyone
needs some space. But what's wrong with sitting him down
and telling him, you know, in an adult way, how
(03:37):
you feel. He doesn't sound like he's gonna listen again.
He said, you said he's gonna try to change you,
but he needs to know that you're serious. Now, you
know if you're taking this relationship any further. These are
simple things. I mean, things that he really should have
been learned at home about boundaries, and since he didn't,
just let him know, I mean, you could be nice.
(03:58):
This is even crazier because he said he has his
own house, So why isn't he at his own house?
Have you been to his own house? Have you seen
his own house? Maybe that's the reason he's staying with you.
Maybe his house is a mess. I mean, boundaries are important. Yeah.
I don't think this is anything to fight about or
anything like that. I just think you need to get
(04:18):
it straight with him and let him know how you
really really feel. Steve, I think this relationship needs to end.
I don't think this woman needs to be in a
damn relationship. I see a totally different letter here. I
don't like to share. Well, that's interesting, because ain't that
all the relationship is built around sharing? It's it's you
(04:42):
can't have relationship if you don't like to share, because
the most important thing you're gonna be shying sharing two
most important things you're gonna be sharing is time and space.
And that means somebody else is in your time and
somebody else is in your space. And if you don't
like to share, you got a problem. But I knew
this letter was gonna be a problem by the way
(05:03):
it started. I'm a twenty nine year old female. I'm
an only child and a daddy's girl. I met a
man that is also an only child, and we hit
it off instantly. Well, ain't this about peaches and cream? Right?
If this ain't about to Lottie, dude, if this ain't
about the chicken, meet the rooster? Right here, Lord her Mercy,
(05:25):
what a perfect match. Two only children have joined forces. Well,
the problem is one of these children don't get it.
And the one that don't get it, this lady that
wrote the letter. He was raised by a single mom
and they are the best of friends. Oh, alone. Oh,
I know what that is right there. I know you're
(05:45):
thinking Mama's boy. It could be, but that don't show
up in the letter, but it shows up on some
other stuff. The way he treats her lets me know
that he's a good man. Okay. He's got a lot
of characteristics, got my father, and even though he's five
years younger, he's got a great career. Now you twenty nine,
he twenty four. Lady, This dude ain't all there right now.
(06:11):
But then I got news for you. You ain't even
I love everything about him, but I do have one pet, Peeve,
He's way too comfortable, too soon with me. We started
being intimate two months after we met. He assumed it
was fine to stay overnight with me. The first time
we had sex. I let him stay because I wanted seconds. Okay, Well, okay,
what's problem? He stayed over? You wanted to Okay? Cool.
(06:34):
When I come back, I'm gonna tell you what's wrong
with her? All right, Steve. We'll have part two of
your response coming up at twenty three minutes after the hour.
Today's Strawberry Letters subject is I don't like to share.
I don't. We'll be back Part two right after this,
you're listening Morning show. All right, Steve, come on, let's
(06:56):
recap today's strawberry letter. The subject is I don't like
to share well. I'm gonna be a little bit more
direct this half of the letter. So let me start
the letter by saying I don't like to share well,
and I understand why. So let's begin this letter like this.
This is a twenty nine year old female who is
an only child and a daddy's girl. Right there, you're
(07:18):
dealing with the person where it's about me. It's about me.
I'm an only child. It's about me. Watch how spoiled
and selfish this letter really turns out to be the
man you met. It is five years younger. He's twenty four.
He was raised by a single mom. Day the best
of friends. You can tell he's a good man by
(07:39):
the way he treats his mother. Blah blah blah blah blah.
He got a great career in his own home, twenty four,
with his own home. That's a good hustle, ain't there.
I love everything about him, but I do have one
peebe's too comfortable, too soon with me? Now you all
started being an interment two months after we met, he
assumed it was fine to stay overnight with me the
first time we had second Okay, I let him stay
(08:00):
because I wanted seconds. I let him stay because I
wanted seconds, not the fact that he was caught up
sprung and he wanted to stay. You wanted seconds, and
you let him stay. He slept in the pair of
my jaggers that were lying on a chair my room.
This is where to let her get a little shaken
for him. He slept in the pair of my joggers
(08:22):
that was laying on a chair in my room. He's
tall and thin, so they fit. I'm glad you cleared
that up right there, gaun. I don't know. I ain't
dated w wearhouse wheatpain. No either you dating a little
bit the ass man or you a great big ass
(08:42):
girl who wanted the two. But here y'all in here
wearing each other plans. Now, I don't know how that worked.
I ain't saying what you are, but you know you
need to pull up a little bit. But he didn't
even ask first. He just put them on. He did
not have on to wear it with my pants, So
that gross me out. Wait a minute, didn't you just
(09:04):
sleep with him? Wait a minute, didn't y'all just have sex?
Didn't y'all climb on each other? Now you're mad because
he got some pants on with no draws on. I
don't understand you. How selfish and self senate are you?
He didn't have on the underwear, and that gross FM out.
When he left, I threw him away. Okay, From then on,
(09:27):
he has made himself at home in my house, and
he's even left a pair of pajama bottoms there so
he can be comfortable when he's visited where you threw
weighted jogs. The man needs something. Damn Lisi bought his
own pajamas. You threw the damn joggers. He thought he's
wearing him last time, he'd have been through all the
draws and can't find him nowhere. You then threw them away.
(09:48):
When we're eating, he loves to sample my food without asking,
and he digs into my plate with his nasty fork,
hitting nasty for what. Wasn't y'all kissing? Yes, that nasty
fog that because it's been in his mouth. You ain't
been in his mouth. How did y'all get to the
sex part? Were no kissing? You ain't getting anyone no
(10:11):
warm up. Okay, he says he's a sharer, and I
have told them I am not. That's because you are
only child and your dad's because you're just a selfish,
self cinnate girl. Y'all don't think you understand how relationship works.
I've explained to him that it's an only child thing,
(10:32):
and he's dead set on changes. I drink wine and
he usually drinks hard. Look now, if he buys me
a bottle of wine, he drinks half of it because
he thinks it's cute that we drink the same thing.
Wait a minute, the man buy a battle of wine.
You want that all to yourself too, damn So he
can't buy a wall of wine and see with his
girl half a glass at wine. You don't share that
(10:53):
even because he thinks it's cute if we drink the
same thing, he's overstepping all of my boundary. They you
really don't need anything because it's your way at a
highway when it comes to my personal things, at my
personal space. I just told you top of the letter
to two things in the relationship that you share the
most of his time and space. Now, if you don't
(11:16):
want the man over there and you don't want to
be in a relationship. Just use him for your little
sex toy five years young. He's your little boy toy
and send him a hood. But don't have a man
thinking he in a relationship with you that y'all should
drink wine together and stuff. Really, you want all the
wine to himself. The final stroll was when he used
my bathtile after I dried off with Should I learn
(11:42):
to acceptance or tell him nicely to knock it off.
Here's my answer to this letter. Y'all need to break up.
You don't like sharing. Its hopeless. She don't like sharing nothing.
She don't want to share nothing. She shared her body,
and these are the examples that she's told about. These
are the extreme examples. It's a lot of she don't
(12:03):
like sharing. She told her man she's not a sharing person.
How do you have a relationship and you're not a sharer?
You got to get past this. And now she's comfortable
to a degree. I'm comfortable to sleep with you. I'm
comfortable to share my body with you, But I don't
want you wearing my jog in pains. I don't want
(12:24):
you to be eating off with your nasty for I
get my pants. You know what I mean. You can't
you get in my pants, but you can't wear my pants.
That don't make no damn sense. Yeah, I can stick
my tongue in your mouth. You can stick your tongue
in my mouth, but you can't stick your fork in
my plate. That don't make no damn sense. All right,
(12:48):
all right, she's selfish. I don't get it. You know,
the dude, he's twenty four. You're a kid. I think
it's a boundary issue. All right. Please leave your comments
on Today's Letter on Instagram at Steve HARVEYSM, and check
out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand. Please up next,
it is Junior with Sports Talk. Right after this, you're
listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show
Popular Podcasts
1. The Podium
The Podium: An NBC Olympic and Paralympic podcast. Join us for insider coverage during the intense competition at the 2024 Paris Olympic and Paralympic Games. In the run-up to the Opening Ceremony, we’ll bring you deep into the stories and events that have you know and those you'll be hard-pressed to forget.
2. In The Village
In The Village will take you into the most exclusive areas of the 2024 Paris Olympic Games to explore the daily life of athletes, complete with all the funny, mundane and unexpected things you learn off the field of play. Join Elizabeth Beisel as she sits down with Olympians each day in Paris.
3. iHeartOlympics: The Latest
Listen to the latest news from the 2024 Olympics.