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January 9, 2025 13 mins

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Speaker 1 (00:00):
It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if
you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more,
please submit your Strawberry Letter to STEVEARBFM dot com and
click submit Strawberry Letter.

Speaker 2 (00:12):
We could be reading your letter live on the.

Speaker 1 (00:15):
Air, just like we're going to read this one right here,
right now, and you never know, it could be yours.

Speaker 3 (00:21):
It could be yours, lads.

Speaker 4 (00:22):
Jolena, it's time for the Strawberry Letter with my good
friend Shirley Strawberry.

Speaker 1 (00:27):
Thank you, my good friend, Junior. Subject I've found out
too late here Stephen Shirley. Early last year, I met
a woman online that swept me off my feet. We
talked for hours on the phone, and we facetimed every
night until we fell asleep. We did that for a month,
and then we started dating but not having sex. She

(00:48):
lived with her mom, so she wouldn't spend the night
with me, even though she's thirty five years old. I understood,
so I would take her back home when it got late.
After a few months of grinding on each other, it
was time to have sex. She said she wanted to
get married first because she was tired of having sex
without commitment. I proposed to her on her birthday at

(01:10):
her mom's house. We had a small wedding on a rooftop,
and then she moved in with me about forty miles
from her mom's house. The first night we spent together
was not good at all because she ate something that
didn't agree with her, and she was in the bathroom
all night. I opened some windows and tried not to

(01:32):
think about it. Over the first week or so, we
were enjoying sex, a lot of sex, but I noticed
that something wasn't right about it, and I nicely asked
her to take better care of her personal hygiene. She
started bathing before bedtime and washing up before work. I
lost interest in being intimate for a while, but I

(01:53):
knew our marriage would not survive if I didn't have
sex with my wife. So much stuff about her changed
after she I had only seen her in wigs or
with braids, so I was shocked that she started wearing
her short afro to work, even after I offered to
pay to get her hair done every week. She's a mess.
My house is a mess, and she can't get along

(02:15):
with my housekeeper. I found out about her too late.
Do I have to keep trying or can I send
this woman back to her mama's house.

Speaker 2 (02:23):
Well that is a question. Only you can answer that part.

Speaker 1 (02:26):
But I'll tell you right now this is not good
and I'm sure that's why she was single in the
first place. She was fooling everyone she probably came in
contact with and tried to be intimate with. She sent
her representative on the first few dates with you, and
then the real her didn't come out until after the marriage,
when it was too late. Personal hygiene is always a

(02:49):
deal breaker. I don't care who it is, how beautiful
you are, all of that. Personal hygiene is always a
deal breaker. And if you can't stand it, I'm glad
you let her know. You said you told her nicely,
but obviously she still didn't get it. But you've got
to let her know you can't stay in a marriage
like that. If she doesn't clean herself up, you'll be gone.
You gotta tell her you took a chance anyway when

(03:10):
you married her so quickly and without really really knowing her.
That was sounds like you say, love, but desperation maybe
on your part because you didn't know much about her
when you proposed. I say, if you really can't stand
this and personal hygiene is an issue which it should
be get out now before you know. I can't just

(03:34):
get out now, that's all I gotta say. Personal hygiene
too much of an issue, Steve.

Speaker 5 (03:39):
Yeah, okay.

Speaker 4 (03:40):
Well, Shirley said in her response to you to the letter,
this is a question that she can't answer for you
because you wanted to know. Can you send her back
to her mama? Well, this is a question I can answer.
I don't have no damn problem provide my answer and I.

Speaker 5 (04:01):
And I think you're gonna agree with me.

Speaker 4 (04:04):
So let's just say before we get started, this letter
that I'm about to read is about. This letter is
not called I learned too late. The name of this
letter is damn it. It's over.

Speaker 2 (04:20):
That's the subject.

Speaker 4 (04:22):
Yeah, damn it, it's over. I can't find the letter
because I lost it on my phone.

Speaker 2 (04:29):
I found too late. Is the real subject?

Speaker 4 (04:32):
Yeah, I found out too late. It's the real subject
that the subject to me is damn it, I'm gone.
Last year, he met this woman online that swept him
off his feet. Face timed every night till they fell asleep.
Did that for a month. Then they started Dayton, but
they wasn't having no sex, and she knew not to

(04:56):
have no sex or else this dayton was gonna.

Speaker 3 (04:59):
End before so y'all dated.

Speaker 4 (05:02):
Then she was living with her mama, so she wouldn't
spend the night with me. That ain't why she ain't
spend the night with She ain't spend the night with you,
because she got to set this hook deep because a
lot of people don't escape this one before. And I
she says that in the letter, and even though she's
thirty five years old, I understood. So I would take

(05:24):
her back home when it got late. After a few
months of grinding on each other. See right here, right here,
months of grinding right putting pressure on it, you know,
getting it worked up. I'm talking about hot and barb. Well,
after months of grinding, it was time to have sex.

(05:46):
Then she said I wanted to get married first because
she was tired of having sex with our commitment.

Speaker 3 (05:51):
This was a tell tale sign right there.

Speaker 4 (05:56):
If you had a lot of sex and nobody has
ever wanted to marry you either two things. The sex
was not good enough to hold their attention or you
this woman in this letter, Now let's see which one
this was. So she said she wasn't having sex without

(06:20):
a commitment. I proposed to her on her birthday. I'll
be damn getting married.

Speaker 5 (06:27):
Yes, so you can have some sex.

Speaker 4 (06:29):
Oh, hang on, Steve, Uh, okay, we'll.

Speaker 2 (06:33):
Have part two.

Speaker 1 (06:35):
We'll have part two of your response coming up at
twenty three minutes after the hour. Today's subject Steve changes
though I found out too late, but you changed it
to what Steve?

Speaker 3 (06:44):
Damn it, it's over.

Speaker 2 (06:46):
I'm gone, yeah, all right, right after this, did.

Speaker 4 (06:53):
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(07:14):
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Speaker 3 (07:15):
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Speaker 4 (07:18):
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Speaker 1 (07:23):
All right, come on, Steve, let's recap today's strawberry letter.
The subject is I found out too late, but you
changed it.

Speaker 4 (07:29):
Yep, I found out too late because Shirley said at
the end of the letter, can I deal with this woman?
Or can I send her back to her mama, Shirley said,
And her proper response was, it's not up for me
to tell you that. That's up to you. My response
to that question is you did right in to me.

(07:50):
I have no problem with shared with you my direct
opinion of what I think should happen. You met a
woman online, swept you off your feet FaceTime every night,
fell in love, started dating, but you didn't have sex.
She lived with a mama, so you spend it wouldn't
spend the night with you, even though she thirty five.

Speaker 3 (08:09):
I understood, so I would take her back home when
he got late.

Speaker 4 (08:12):
After a few months of grinding on each other, it
was time to have sex. She wanted to get married
first because she was tired of having sex with our commitment.
Good move, ladies, way to hold you made a way
to get some value from yourself. I got no problem
with this. But this was based on this letter trickery.

(08:35):
Because she no once he getting what he looking for,
and he find out what it is, it's probably gonna
be a problem anyway.

Speaker 3 (08:45):
So I proposed to her on.

Speaker 4 (08:46):
Her birthday at her mama's house. We had a small
wedding on the rooftop. She might this must be a
rooftop somewhere else, because I ain't been over nobody girl house.
But we have wed no rooftop. I ain't into nobody house.
Nobody helse we had to wind up a rooftop. They
must went down to an apartment building or something country.

(09:07):
Most roofs I've seen gonna be hard to stand up there.
But anyway, about forty had she moved in with me,
about forty miles from my mama house.

Speaker 5 (09:17):
Here we go.

Speaker 4 (09:18):
The first night we spent together was not good at
all because she ate something that didn't agree with her.
She was in the bathroom all night. I opened some
windows and tried not to think about it. Now, let's
go over this line right here. I opened some windows.
I knew it now that means. That means not just

(09:41):
in the bathroom. This had got all out in the
hall with yeat, and then towards the guest quarter. It
was down there in the dining room, all.

Speaker 3 (09:54):
Up by the front. Dope.

Speaker 4 (09:57):
You done open up some windows and let me tell
you something. I'm a ma. Now, you can't come in
that bathroom right after me. It's not recommended. You have
got to learn to flush as we go. You can
sit there. You have got to flush and go. My
mama told me that if you hear splash, flush alright,

(10:22):
gosh what you say, don't wait on flash flush, go
sit in there waiting to unload.

Speaker 5 (10:30):
You got to just keep flushing.

Speaker 4 (10:32):
Boy, Okay, open the bunch. If you hear splash, you
must flush.

Speaker 3 (10:44):
We blush as you go. You need to know this.

Speaker 4 (10:48):
Man say no time, sit in here and mind you're
work and all that.

Speaker 5 (10:53):
And that ain't what you do as you go, that fool. Now,
don't say.

Speaker 3 (10:58):
That all right here.

Speaker 4 (11:01):
Over the first week or so, we were enjoying sex,
a lot of sex, but I noticed something wasn't right
about it, and I asked her to take better care
of her personal height. Now we all know what this means,
and we don't have to be graphic. I'm not gonna
do that to you. But if a man has to

(11:24):
tell you.

Speaker 5 (11:26):
Need to do something.

Speaker 4 (11:28):
After he said, we were enjoying sex, a lot of sex,
but then I noticed something wasn't right.

Speaker 5 (11:36):
That means it was good. But what is what is that?

Speaker 3 (11:41):
What he was doing?

Speaker 5 (11:43):
He was doing stuff and just what he was doing.

Speaker 4 (11:45):
Woo lord, I'm telling you what is ah, baby, I'm.

Speaker 5 (11:51):
Working it now.

Speaker 3 (11:52):
I got you okay, all right, Oh baby, I got
you now. Oh I got it working? Whose is it? Who?

Speaker 5 (11:59):
What?

Speaker 3 (12:00):
What is it?

Speaker 2 (12:04):
Anyway?

Speaker 3 (12:08):
Man?

Speaker 5 (12:10):
Did you? Did you eat again?

Speaker 3 (12:12):
What is what is going on?

Speaker 5 (12:14):
Anyway?

Speaker 4 (12:15):
She started bathing before bedtime and washing up before work.

Speaker 3 (12:20):
What I ain't I've never had a woman.

Speaker 4 (12:24):
I've had to say this. I've never most women. Most women.
Let me just say, ladies, thank you, because most of
y'all take excellent care of yourself. But when you got
to tell them and then she said, I lost interest
in being intimate for a while, but I knew our
marriage wouldn't survive if we didn't have sex with my wife.

(12:46):
So much stuff about her changed after she moved in.
I'd only seen in wigs and braids, and I was shocked.
And she started wearing her short outflow to work. Then
after offered pay to get her had done every week.
She's a mess. My house a mess.

Speaker 3 (12:59):
She can't get.

Speaker 4 (12:59):
Along with the housekeeper because the housekeeper cussing hard every
time she come in. How your house worse than I
just cleaned it up? Yes, I found out about her
too late. Do I have to keep trying or can
I see this woman back to her mama's house. You
ain't gonna be able to fix this dog. I'm not
gonna be telling no woman she got the babe, wash
up before you go to work. I'm not fit to

(13:20):
do that right now? All right, hooks, right on back
over to your mama house.

Speaker 2 (13:25):
Today's truck, I got that whole house.

Speaker 5 (13:27):
Think over there.

Speaker 1 (13:28):
What's you're comings? On Today's Strawberry Letter at Steve Harvey
FM on Instagram and Facebook, and check out the Strawberry
Letter podcast on the free iHeartRadio app.

Speaker 2 (13:38):
Free Never Sounded so good. You can download it today
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Host

Shirley Strawberry

Shirley Strawberry

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