July 11, 2024 • 13 mins
Dear Steve and Shirley, I’m a 35 year old man with 2 kids and a stepdaughter by my wife. I love my family, but I have come to a breaking point with my wife. For the second time in 4 years she has left the home and cut off all contact with me and the kids. The first time she left, she ran off with a man that she met online. She bought a bus ticket and rode out west and didn’t contact us for a month. Eventually, the guy dumped her and she reached out to me.............
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And if you need
advice and relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting and more. Please
submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com and
click on where it says submit Strawberry Letter. We could
be reading your letter live on the air, just like
you're going to read this one right here, right now.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Be you muggle up and hold on time.
Speaker 3 (00:23):
We got it for you.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Here it is Strawberry Letter.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Thank you the nephew. Subject My wife keeps leaving me
and coming back. She keeps leaving me and coming back.
To Stephen Shirley, I'm a thirty five year old man
with two kids and a step daughter by my wife.
I love my family, but I have come to a
breaking point with my wife. For the second time in
(00:47):
four years. She has left the home and cut off
all contact with me and the kids. The first time
she left, she ran off with a man that she
met online. She bought a bus ticket and wrote wrote
out west and didn't contact us for a month. Eventually,
the guy dumped her and she reached out to me.
I ended up sending her four hundred dollars for her
(01:09):
to get back home. Earlier this summer, I was grilling
and the kids were in the pool. My wife said
she had to run to Walmart to get a few things.
We have not seen her since then. The kids and
I rode all around town looking for her that night
and the next day. I kind of figured she'd left
us again, but I didn't want to upset the kids.
(01:31):
I filed a missing person's report with the police, and
the police told me since she'd left before, they wouldn't
open an investigation right away. I posted pictures on Facebook,
and instantly I got all kinds of messages saying that
she'd been seen around our city and a few cities
close by. I wasn't surprised, and I waited for her
(01:51):
to call home. After forty five days, she called, saying
she needs to come back home and she is ashamed
of what she keep doing to the family. I told
the kids she called and is ready to come home.
They said I shouldn't let her come back, and we'd
be just fine without her. We've been married fourteen years,
(02:12):
and I've kept the marriage together for the kids. But
now they're saying to throw her and the whole marriage away.
Do you think I should take their advice or give
my wife one more chance, please advise well, I mean,
you know, the decision, of course, is ultimately up to
you what you do. Should you take the kid's advice
(02:34):
or give your wife one more chance? Is that what
you want to do? Well, it's certainly not what the
kids want you to do, because they're sick of her.
They really are, and they let you know so you
can let yourself off the hook. They want you to
stop feeling guilty about all this, your wife leaving and
coming back and running off with some man she met online,
(02:56):
and you know, just not hearing from her, no contact
for forty days and a month, forty five days. What
is all of this? And then you have two kids
and one of them is her stepdaughter. She's sick of
her mom too. They want a divorce from her, and
really so should you At this point your wife doesn't
care about you, she doesn't care about the kids.
Speaker 3 (03:16):
And your kids I don't know how old they are.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
You said they were in the pool while you were grilling,
but I mean they're cool just with being with you.
Speaker 3 (03:24):
Dad.
Speaker 1 (03:25):
I just say, I'm saying sorry here, but your wife
is trifling and she's a horrible mom. I mean, is
she on drugs or something. What is going on with her?
Who just walks out on her family and comes back
like nothing ever happened. I'm sure this is devastating for
your children.
Speaker 3 (03:41):
I'm sure it is. Who does this?
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Why should they have to continue to go through this
time and time again? They can't be secure, they can't
you know, they're unsure of themselves.
Speaker 3 (03:56):
And why should you have to continually go through this?
Who can live like this?
Speaker 1 (04:00):
I just you know, you never know from one day
to the next if you'll have a mom or or
if you have a wife or not. I say, pack
her bags, put yourself and your kids out of this
revolving door of a marriage, and tell your wife that
you and the guys will be just fine without her.
She's selfish and that's what the kids want you to
do anyway, But unless you really want to do it,
(04:23):
and I don't see why you wouldn't, I don't know,
don't let her back.
Speaker 3 (04:27):
Okay, she's a source of misery for you guys.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
Steve, Well, let me start by saying this to you.
It ain't a good look when your kids is smarter
than you, right, you know, it just ain't a good look.
Let me just start there. Okay, hright, here we go.
(04:56):
You're thirty five year old man, got two kids and
a step daughter. I love my family. But she had
a breaking point. For the second time in four years,
she'd have left home, cut off all contact with me
and the kids the first time. She first time she left,
(05:17):
she ran off with a man she met online. She
bought a bus ticket and rolled out west. What a
trifling this badass decision. Who buys a bus ticket to
ride out west? You know, like she in a Western
or something. Go west, young man, fortune out there. And
(05:43):
she left you for a dude that sent her a
bus ticket, from a man that has a house with
a swimming pool in it in the backyard grilling. She
left you for a man that sent her a bus ticket.
(06:04):
Your wife is not a bright person. The kids are,
the wife is not. So let's try to make some
sense of it. And she brought a bus ticket rode out.
She didn't contact us for a month. Damn man, that's
(06:25):
hard it's hardful. Eventually, the god dumptor she reached out
to me. I ended up spending four hundred dollars for
her to get back home. Now, you obviously bought a plane.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
Ticket hold on, We'll hold on, Steve, hold that buck,
just hold it, hold it. We'll have part two of
Steve's response coming up in twenty three minutes after the hour.
Today's subject my wife keeps leaving me and coming back.
We'll get into it right after this. You're listening hard
morning show. All right, Come on, Steve, let's recap today's
(06:57):
strawberry letter. The subject my wife keeps leaving me and
coming back?
Speaker 2 (07:04):
Yeah, yeah, she been doing it, second time in four
years she done left. The first time she left with
a man she met online. She bought a bus ticket
and rode out west. I knew this relationship was doomed.
(07:26):
You meet a dude online, he'd buy you a bus ticket,
all right, eventually got dumptor you ended up sending four
hundred dollars for her way to get back home. Yos
do it there, had bought the airline ticket. Clearly you
care more about her than the dude online. Now hit
(07:48):
a good one right here. Earlier this summer, I was grilly, kids,
was outside in the pool. My wife said she had
to run the wall oh Mart to get a few things.
We ain't seen her head horrible. What did she what
happened at the walmart. This is bad. The kids and
(08:15):
I rode around town looking for her that night.
Speaker 3 (08:20):
And the next day what.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
And the next day then the dude said, because he
got tuition, I kind of figured she left us again.
I ain't want to upset the kids, so I filed
a missing person report. Police told me since she left before,
they wouldn't open then investigation right away. Then you put
some pictures on Facebook, and everybody started calling you, telling
(08:44):
you I saw that helper doll, that Earl Turner's right, well,
I saw up at Abagail's. She was at to speak
easy too, that she came into tabbing Friday. They just
saw her everywhere. Yeah, you know she's old bro that
go do country stuff. You know this ain't no big
city chicken, Okay, because of the bus So I wasn't surprised.
(09:09):
And I waited for her to call home after forty
fat days so crazy. This help of call back home
says she's ashamed of what she keeps doing to the family.
Suley says, something right. Is she on drugs because this
guy crackhead rolled all over it?
Speaker 3 (09:30):
Yeah, yeah, matter of fact.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
Let me let me, let me, let me, let me
back it down a little bit. Is she on myth
Let me tell you what. When you see her, look
at her teeth real good? Why because if you on
matthe your teeth is shot. Oh you ain't see the
tiger king?
Speaker 3 (09:52):
Yeah, yeah his man.
Speaker 2 (09:56):
Did you see his mouth?
Speaker 3 (09:57):
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, that's.
Speaker 2 (10:03):
I don't care what your sexual preference is. You got
to want somebody with some better looking teeth than that. Damn.
You got to have your mouth.
Speaker 3 (10:15):
Right, You have to, you have to.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
Yeah. Now, I told the kids she called and ready
to come home. The kids said, don't let her come back.
We just fine without her. You know, you messed up
when your kids don't want their mama no more.
Speaker 3 (10:31):
Your blood daughter, your blood daughter.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
We've been married fourteen years, and I've kept the marriage
together for the kids. Now this is interesting because now
they're saying to throw her in the whole marriage away.
So if she had a stepdaughter, the stepdaughter got to
be at least fifteen, because y'all only been together for
fourteen years, unless she had the baby while she was
(10:56):
on the bus trip she is. Do you think I
should take their advice or give my wife one more chance?
Let me ask you something, bro, give your wife one
more chance to do what to leave a third time?
(11:18):
Please advise, brother, I don't even know why you struggling
with her. This is not a sign of a person
that's no longer any in love with you or her family.
She loves something else. Now. I ain't saying she owned drugs.
It do sound like drugs to me because she go
on these benches. I don't know what's wrong with her,
but the kids deserve better. You seem like a good man.
(11:42):
You probably get you a good woman.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
Me personally, I'm just this just Steve Harvey talker. Please
don't tweet and facebook me about my responses because you
know I don't really care no more. I really don't.
I done got sixty three. I don't got real com
do what I'm saying on this show. Divorce, Yeah, yeah,
I'm divorcing her. I don't think he has real choice.
(12:09):
I'm divorcing her. I'm not living like this is clear.
You don't want me and these kids. I don't want
to see sending the kids through it, and I want
somebody to gree with me and the kids and be
in the pool.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
You can leave your husband and your kids.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
You will leave me or somebody that bought a bus ticket. Yeah,
that's what I'm throwd off. I could see if you
came up. You didn't even go lateral. You just took
a step down. You rode a bus out west.
Speaker 3 (12:41):
We don't even know where that is. I mean, yeah,
y out west, just west?
Speaker 2 (12:47):
Yeah Texas. Yeah, probably just went Western Mississippi, ended up
ended up in Mississippi.
Speaker 3 (12:57):
Wow, just wherever.
Speaker 2 (12:58):
Yeah, this is a bad she's a bad woman. She's
not a good person. I'm down with him. You can
do what you want to do, Bro, but he's a kid.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
Thank you, Steve.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
Post your comments on Today's Strawberry Letter at Steve Harvey FM,
on Instagram and Facebook. Check out the Strawberry Letter podcast
on demand. You're listening Steve Harvey Morning Show
Time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And if you need
advice and relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting and more. Please
submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com and
click on where it says submit Strawberry Letter. We could
be reading your letter live on the air, just like
you're going to read this one right here, right now.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Be you muggle up and hold on time.
Speaker 3 (00:23):
We got it for you.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Here it is Strawberry Letter.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Thank you the nephew. Subject My wife keeps leaving me
and coming back. She keeps leaving me and coming back.
To Stephen Shirley, I'm a thirty five year old man
with two kids and a step daughter by my wife.
I love my family, but I have come to a
breaking point with my wife. For the second time in
(00:47):
four years. She has left the home and cut off
all contact with me and the kids. The first time
she left, she ran off with a man that she
met online. She bought a bus ticket and wrote wrote
out west and didn't contact us for a month. Eventually,
the guy dumped her and she reached out to me.
I ended up sending her four hundred dollars for her
(01:09):
to get back home. Earlier this summer, I was grilling
and the kids were in the pool. My wife said
she had to run to Walmart to get a few things.
We have not seen her since then. The kids and
I rode all around town looking for her that night
and the next day. I kind of figured she'd left
us again, but I didn't want to upset the kids.
(01:31):
I filed a missing person's report with the police, and
the police told me since she'd left before, they wouldn't
open an investigation right away. I posted pictures on Facebook,
and instantly I got all kinds of messages saying that
she'd been seen around our city and a few cities
close by. I wasn't surprised, and I waited for her
(01:51):
to call home. After forty five days, she called, saying
she needs to come back home and she is ashamed
of what she keep doing to the family. I told
the kids she called and is ready to come home.
They said I shouldn't let her come back, and we'd
be just fine without her. We've been married fourteen years,
(02:12):
and I've kept the marriage together for the kids. But
now they're saying to throw her and the whole marriage away.
Do you think I should take their advice or give
my wife one more chance, please advise well, I mean,
you know, the decision, of course, is ultimately up to
you what you do. Should you take the kid's advice
(02:34):
or give your wife one more chance? Is that what
you want to do? Well, it's certainly not what the
kids want you to do, because they're sick of her.
They really are, and they let you know so you
can let yourself off the hook. They want you to
stop feeling guilty about all this, your wife leaving and
coming back and running off with some man she met online,
(02:56):
and you know, just not hearing from her, no contact
for forty days and a month, forty five days. What
is all of this? And then you have two kids
and one of them is her stepdaughter. She's sick of
her mom too. They want a divorce from her, and
really so should you At this point your wife doesn't
care about you, she doesn't care about the kids.
Speaker 3 (03:16):
And your kids I don't know how old they are.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
You said they were in the pool while you were grilling,
but I mean they're cool just with being with you.
Speaker 3 (03:24):
Dad.
Speaker 1 (03:25):
I just say, I'm saying sorry here, but your wife
is trifling and she's a horrible mom. I mean, is
she on drugs or something. What is going on with her?
Who just walks out on her family and comes back
like nothing ever happened. I'm sure this is devastating for
your children.
Speaker 3 (03:41):
I'm sure it is. Who does this?
Speaker 1 (03:46):
Why should they have to continue to go through this
time and time again? They can't be secure, they can't
you know, they're unsure of themselves.
Speaker 3 (03:56):
And why should you have to continually go through this?
Who can live like this?
Speaker 1 (04:00):
I just you know, you never know from one day
to the next if you'll have a mom or or
if you have a wife or not. I say, pack
her bags, put yourself and your kids out of this
revolving door of a marriage, and tell your wife that
you and the guys will be just fine without her.
She's selfish and that's what the kids want you to
do anyway, But unless you really want to do it,
(04:23):
and I don't see why you wouldn't, I don't know,
don't let her back.
Speaker 3 (04:27):
Okay, she's a source of misery for you guys.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
Steve, Well, let me start by saying this to you.
It ain't a good look when your kids is smarter
than you, right, you know, it just ain't a good look.
Let me just start there. Okay, hright, here we go.
(04:56):
You're thirty five year old man, got two kids and
a step daughter. I love my family. But she had
a breaking point. For the second time in four years,
she'd have left home, cut off all contact with me
and the kids the first time. She first time she left,
(05:17):
she ran off with a man she met online. She
bought a bus ticket and rolled out west. What a
trifling this badass decision. Who buys a bus ticket to
ride out west? You know, like she in a Western
or something. Go west, young man, fortune out there. And
(05:43):
she left you for a dude that sent her a
bus ticket, from a man that has a house with
a swimming pool in it in the backyard grilling. She
left you for a man that sent her a bus ticket.
(06:04):
Your wife is not a bright person. The kids are,
the wife is not. So let's try to make some
sense of it. And she brought a bus ticket rode out.
She didn't contact us for a month. Damn man, that's
(06:25):
hard it's hardful. Eventually, the god dumptor she reached out
to me. I ended up spending four hundred dollars for
her to get back home. Now, you obviously bought a plane.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
Ticket hold on, We'll hold on, Steve, hold that buck,
just hold it, hold it. We'll have part two of
Steve's response coming up in twenty three minutes after the hour.
Today's subject my wife keeps leaving me and coming back.
We'll get into it right after this. You're listening hard
morning show. All right, Come on, Steve, let's recap today's
(06:57):
strawberry letter. The subject my wife keeps leaving me and
coming back?
Speaker 2 (07:04):
Yeah, yeah, she been doing it, second time in four
years she done left. The first time she left with
a man she met online. She bought a bus ticket
and rode out west. I knew this relationship was doomed.
(07:26):
You meet a dude online, he'd buy you a bus ticket,
all right, eventually got dumptor you ended up sending four
hundred dollars for her way to get back home. Yos
do it there, had bought the airline ticket. Clearly you
care more about her than the dude online. Now hit
(07:48):
a good one right here. Earlier this summer, I was grilly, kids,
was outside in the pool. My wife said she had
to run the wall oh Mart to get a few things.
We ain't seen her head horrible. What did she what
happened at the walmart. This is bad. The kids and
(08:15):
I rode around town looking for her that night.
Speaker 3 (08:20):
And the next day what.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
And the next day then the dude said, because he
got tuition, I kind of figured she left us again.
I ain't want to upset the kids, so I filed
a missing person report. Police told me since she left before,
they wouldn't open then investigation right away. Then you put
some pictures on Facebook, and everybody started calling you, telling
(08:44):
you I saw that helper doll, that Earl Turner's right, well,
I saw up at Abagail's. She was at to speak
easy too, that she came into tabbing Friday. They just
saw her everywhere. Yeah, you know she's old bro that
go do country stuff. You know this ain't no big
city chicken, Okay, because of the bus So I wasn't surprised.
(09:09):
And I waited for her to call home after forty
fat days so crazy. This help of call back home
says she's ashamed of what she keeps doing to the family.
Suley says, something right. Is she on drugs because this
guy crackhead rolled all over it?
Speaker 3 (09:30):
Yeah, yeah, matter of fact.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
Let me let me, let me, let me, let me
back it down a little bit. Is she on myth
Let me tell you what. When you see her, look
at her teeth real good? Why because if you on
matthe your teeth is shot. Oh you ain't see the
tiger king?
Speaker 3 (09:52):
Yeah, yeah his man.
Speaker 2 (09:56):
Did you see his mouth?
Speaker 3 (09:57):
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, that's.
Speaker 2 (10:03):
I don't care what your sexual preference is. You got
to want somebody with some better looking teeth than that. Damn.
You got to have your mouth.
Speaker 3 (10:15):
Right, You have to, you have to.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
Yeah. Now, I told the kids she called and ready
to come home. The kids said, don't let her come back.
We just fine without her. You know, you messed up
when your kids don't want their mama no more.
Speaker 3 (10:31):
Your blood daughter, your blood daughter.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
We've been married fourteen years, and I've kept the marriage
together for the kids. Now this is interesting because now
they're saying to throw her in the whole marriage away.
So if she had a stepdaughter, the stepdaughter got to
be at least fifteen, because y'all only been together for
fourteen years, unless she had the baby while she was
(10:56):
on the bus trip she is. Do you think I
should take their advice or give my wife one more chance?
Let me ask you something, bro, give your wife one
more chance to do what to leave a third time?
(11:18):
Please advise, brother, I don't even know why you struggling
with her. This is not a sign of a person
that's no longer any in love with you or her family.
She loves something else. Now. I ain't saying she owned drugs.
It do sound like drugs to me because she go
on these benches. I don't know what's wrong with her,
but the kids deserve better. You seem like a good man.
(11:42):
You probably get you a good woman.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
Me personally, I'm just this just Steve Harvey talker. Please
don't tweet and facebook me about my responses because you
know I don't really care no more. I really don't.
I done got sixty three. I don't got real com
do what I'm saying on this show. Divorce, Yeah, yeah,
I'm divorcing her. I don't think he has real choice.
(12:09):
I'm divorcing her. I'm not living like this is clear.
You don't want me and these kids. I don't want
to see sending the kids through it, and I want
somebody to gree with me and the kids and be
in the pool.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
You can leave your husband and your kids.
Speaker 2 (12:23):
You will leave me or somebody that bought a bus ticket. Yeah,
that's what I'm throwd off. I could see if you
came up. You didn't even go lateral. You just took
a step down. You rode a bus out west.
Speaker 3 (12:41):
We don't even know where that is. I mean, yeah,
y out west, just west?
Speaker 2 (12:47):
Yeah Texas. Yeah, probably just went Western Mississippi, ended up
ended up in Mississippi.
Speaker 3 (12:57):
Wow, just wherever.
Speaker 2 (12:58):
Yeah, this is a bad she's a bad woman. She's
not a good person. I'm down with him. You can
do what you want to do, Bro, but he's a kid.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
Thank you, Steve.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
Post your comments on Today's Strawberry Letter at Steve Harvey FM,
on Instagram and Facebook. Check out the Strawberry Letter podcast
on demand. You're listening Steve Harvey Morning Show
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