Generation X! Happy GRUNGY Thanksgiving With 'Alice In Chains Restaurant'!

Forget Arlo Guthrie's 'Alice's Restaurant'.
It's a new Thanksgiving tradition!
'Alice in Chains Restaurant'! Rock on!!

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
This song is called Alice in ChainsRestaurant, and it's about Alice in the
restaurant. But Alice in Chains Restaurant, it's not the name of the restaurant.
What. That's just the name ofthe song. And that's why I
called the song Alice Chains Restaurants.Walk right in. It's a fast food
hut. Deny your maker, sowyour eyes shut. You can't get anything

(00:23):
you want at Alison Chain's restaurant.Now. It all started two Thanksgivings ago,
two years ago on Thanksgiving, whenmy friend and I went up to
visit Alie in Chains and the leadsinger at overdosed and a waitress name Alice
came up to us and said,you're just see through, faded, overrated,

(00:47):
and out of your mind. Nowshe offered us some turkey, and
that was mighty generous on Thanksgiving.Now, turkeys sounded mighty fine, but
we were looking for some holiday action. We'd come to kill the rooster.
Well, Alice wouldn't give us thosechicken wings, and chicken wings was what

(01:07):
we wanted. Well, we wantedwings. And I said, Alice,
isn't going to kill you to makechicken wings, And she replied, is
simply enough, she ain't found away to kill me yet, eyes burned
with stinging sweat. Well, atthis point I was puzzled. So far

(01:32):
I'm getting nothing I wanted. Alicein Chain's restaurant. Alice was through with
us at this point and pretty muchasked us to leave. She said,
have yourself a happy Thanksgiving, walkingtall machine gun man. They spit on

(01:53):
me in my home. Lass.Well, after that we'd had enough.
I mean really, now, athilist would have brought us some hot chicken
wings. We would have been happyto leave her a great tip and a
big old pile of them bones.Well, as we suspected all along through

(02:15):
our story, you can't get anythingyou want at Alison Chain's restaurant. Y'all
have a happy Thanksgiving now, theedge