December 4, 2025 • 16 mins
Fred doesn't believe couples who say they don't fight! Plus, Fred has a HUGE confession to make!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is the Bread Show.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Zame is taking over in Las Vegas this January for
his seven night residents at Dobe Live at Park MGM,
and we've got a trip for two to the January
twenty fifth show to night Hotel State Park MGM January
twenty fourth through the twenty sixth and round trip airfare.
Text Remember to three seven three three seven now for
a chance to win. A confirmation text will be said.
(00:22):
Standard message of data rates may apply. All thanks to
Live Nation. Okay, I want to talk to Sam. Sam,
you and your husband you never fight. You've never fought.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
We've definitely had small arguments, but so many of them
have have not happened because of how we try to
prevent them and so like we've never had a full
out screaming match at each other. We've never you know,
said horrible things to each other in the middle of
a fight. Like do we sometimes have the occasional you know,
(00:55):
we walk around each other and don't talk, maybe for
a couple minutes. But I mean, we just do a
really good job of preventively avoiding the arguments from communicating.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
Because as a guy who's conflict avoidant, right, like, I
don't like to get a knockdown drag outs. And it's
not because I don't know if you should or shouldn't.
It's that I find that when you when it gets
to that point, especially if someone feels like they're behind
in the argument, then things start to shift into an
area they don't need to go. And maybe it's because
I grew up and my mom, as amazing as she is,
(01:28):
she was the person who would she'd go for the jugular,
like if she wanted the argument to end, she'd say
the thing that had nothing to do with anything, and
then it's like, oh and the argument's over. You win,
But then you got to walk back the thing that
you said that had nothing to do with the thing.
Which is why I think I'm conflict avoidant and I
don't get into I try not to get in fights
like that because it winds up you have to undo
(01:48):
the fight before you get back to the issue, which
I hate. However, I'm not sure that my way is
healthy where you never have the fight and I get
you know, yes, in a perfect world, it's like you, guys, Sam,
where it's just you know, you're able to have this
sort of discipline to know when to separate and to
know how to argue and to know how to debate,
but really never a big fight.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
No.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
But I think it also comes down to him and
I both had really toxic relationships before this, where like
we did fight with prior you know, partners, and so
now that we've seen how horrible it gets, we knew
right off the bat that we didn't want to repeat that,
especially in front of our daughter.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
And so we've we've done a.
Speaker 3 (02:30):
Lot of you know, communicating, talking how do we fix this?
And you know, do I want to punch him in
the face once in a while, one hundred percent, But
we learned that that's not really the right way to
do it, and it's it's worked out really well for us.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
So good for you guys. Thank you, Sam, have a
good day.
Speaker 4 (02:46):
Thanks you guys.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
Do love you guys, Thank you for listening.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
I mean, who am I to be? I may give
that relationship advice every day, and who am I to
do it? But I'm the first admit I'm not very
good at any of that. But I don't know. Maybe
for me, this story jumps out because as happy as
I am about the Travis Kelcey and Taylor Swift thing,
there's just no doubt in my mind, he's along for
the ride. And that's not to say she doesn't bring
him a lot in the relationship and that she hasn't
(03:10):
changed his life in a positive way in many ways,
I'm sure, but I contend that he's one of those
guys that just smiles ah, and it's just in awe
of her all the time, and that makes me nervous.
Speaker 5 (03:19):
Yeah, he's happy to be there.
Speaker 2 (03:21):
There's a difference between it being happy to be there
and and cowering. There's a difference between you know, letting.
Speaker 1 (03:29):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
There's part of me that anytime someone should just googoo goggon,
they're just looking at the stars the whole time and
we never fight and yeah, she's selling anything. It's part
of me that's like, Yeah, you can be the most
amazing person I've ever met, but I can still disagree
with you, and I can still sometimes see that you're
not perfect. And I wonder if the people who are
in the clouds don't they eventually come down from the clouds.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Yeah, I feel like.
Speaker 6 (03:52):
Two years is still a honeymoon phase, Like I don't
what I mean. Yeah, yeah, so I definitely think that
they'll get there, I'm sure. I mean, she's a fire sign.
I think he's a libra, which the fact that I
even maybe know that is crazy.
Speaker 5 (04:03):
But no, they'll get there.
Speaker 6 (04:05):
But I've been in like I've been in a five year,
a seven year, and I will say the first two
years are still for me the honeymoon.
Speaker 5 (04:12):
So maybe they're just they'll get there. George and themal
I don't. I don't know.
Speaker 6 (04:16):
George basically said, like I'm old, I don't have it
in me, Like what am I gonna argue about?
Speaker 5 (04:20):
I'm m sixties, So I don't know about them.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
But I can honestly tell you that I've been in
relationships before where the person I almost think had too
high of a regard for me, like like what like
I honestly I felt I felt like I could that
very often, but I felt like I could probably do anything,
(04:43):
and this person was gonna be like, Okay, you know
that's all right. I mean it's like they saw so
much good in me or something. But I'm sorry, but
it was a little bit unattractive because it's like, at
what point, And I'm not saying I tested that because
I'm not that kind of person, and I really like
I don't know. I'm not I'm not a liar, I'm
not deceptive. I don't cheat on do stuff like that.
(05:04):
I wasn't like, well, I'm gonna go out and cheats
if I can get away with it. But I just
I thought, like, I'm not that good of a dude,
like come on, like for you really, you know, like
you're you matter too. And I knew that, but sometimes
I felt like that person maybe wasn't putting themselves at
enough of a priority as enough of a priority, and
it was kind of unattractive.
Speaker 5 (05:24):
Yeah, I'm with you there.
Speaker 6 (05:26):
I'm not attracted to someone who just agrees with me
all the time and doesn't have an opinion.
Speaker 5 (05:29):
I'm definitely not into that.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
But Kiki and Paulina would be great with it.
Speaker 4 (05:32):
Yeah, I don't enjoy fighting. Like, I don't enjoy it.
I don't think it's a good time. I'm like, why
are we doing this? Like just just agree with me,
come on, man, you know it's not hard and I
don't ask for a lie, you know, So I don't
I don't enjoy fighting.
Speaker 5 (05:48):
It's it's actually like I don't like it at all.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Well, I guess would be you know, in a partnership
both people could eliminate. Like I said before, I'd say
maybe a quarter of the fights could be eliminated if
somebody would just shut up, which I'm not good at doing. However,
I also think that if you truly want every argument
in both of your relationships, every single one, I think
that at some point you might scratch your head and go,
(06:11):
why does this it's all I hate to say this,
but it's almost like where where what are they doing?
Speaker 1 (06:17):
Like why does it? You know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Like where are you getting this outlet? Like why do
I just win everything? Why do you not care?
Speaker 1 (06:23):
You know?
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Is it because like you don't, I don't know. It's
almost a bad thing.
Speaker 6 (06:28):
Yeah, I will say, if I start agreeing with everything
you do, then you know the relationship is about to
be over because I don't care anymore.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
I'm exhausted, or it's like I'm cheating on you, and
it's like I don't want to fight with you because
I'm trying to cover up this other thing. So like,
sure we'll go there, you just do that. Yes, you're
right about that, Yes I'm sorry about that. But a
bunch of texts about this, by the way, and again,
what the hell do I know? But someone said, I'm
a therapist and can tell you that a lot of
men are struggling with standing their ground against their partner
(06:57):
and they're fearful of being perceived as toxic or abusive. Oh, Fred,
you definitely have okay daddy energy. What does that mean?
Speaker 5 (07:06):
Okay, daddy, Okay daddy.
Speaker 1 (07:08):
I mean I got daddy issues. But I don't know.
Speaker 6 (07:10):
I think it means that like she would be in
a relationship with you and just say like, okay, daddy,
Oh now that's hot. Yeah you're so, she would agree
with you.
Speaker 2 (07:19):
I could shut my mouth a lot more. But I
also I also don't I would I would question myself
if everything someone did okay, because I feel like you're
trading off your value in some ways, and why are
you doing that? No, it's almost like do you have trauma,
(07:40):
like where you don't think you matter?
Speaker 7 (07:41):
No, Well, that's valid, But I was gonna say, like,
what if someone just doesn't like me? I'm very easy going.
I really don't care if we have you know, Chinese
or Mexican for dinner tonight?
Speaker 1 (07:49):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 7 (07:49):
Because sometimes, like I feel like even those things are
turned into arguments because then you don't feel hurt or seen.
Speaker 5 (07:54):
But like, what if I truly just want.
Speaker 7 (07:56):
To eat and I don't care, But now you think
I'm a punk because I won't stand on it, you know,
But I get it. If it's something bigger, like you know,
how are we going to raise our children or something
like you know where you want to send them to school?
Speaker 5 (08:06):
That's that's a different conversation. But I don't know.
Speaker 7 (08:08):
I just feel like, what's the point of fighting when
you can just meet your partner halfway and everybody's happy
it's given take?
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean that that does make sense. Julie.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
Hi, So you have been together since we were sixteen?
Hell are you now, Julie.
Speaker 8 (08:23):
Fifty five?
Speaker 1 (08:25):
Oh wow, I'm quick. Math, that's a long time.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
Forty yeah, four fifty gosh, what forty something years?
Speaker 1 (08:33):
And you've never you've never fought at all.
Speaker 8 (08:38):
We've had disagreements, but we've never had a yelling, screaming fight.
We've never had where we called each other names. I mean,
we've just never done it. We've gotten quiet, sometimes walked away,
but we don't fight.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (08:58):
Wow, Well, and you guys have been talk it out
so almost as long as I've been alive.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
So good for you. Congratulations.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
I mean, hey, you guys are just more mature and
maybe maybe certain people can just get lucky and they
meet their communications styles. His match, it looks like that's you, Julie.
Thank you, have a good day.
Speaker 8 (09:13):
Yes, thanks you.
Speaker 1 (09:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
Honestly, for me, the thing that jumped out about this
story was that he's in the clouds.
Speaker 1 (09:18):
He is not being realistic. Eat your right.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
He still is in a honeymoon phase and at some
point you're gonna wait and be like, yeah, Taylor, you're
pretty amazing, but your poop stinks too, girl, Jessica.
Speaker 1 (09:31):
Yeah, hi Jessica.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
So you think appeasing and sort of like giving in
to your partner consistently would lead to more fights?
Speaker 9 (09:40):
Yeah, it was early on in mine and my husband's relationship.
But he would just be like, Okay, fine, I don't
want to fight anymore, and then we would have the
same fight over and over again, and I'm like, wait,
I thought when we stopped fighting that nant you understood,
and we would stop fighting about that, But he would
just continue to do it because he was just like whatever,
I don't care.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
Yeah, because he didn't really want to do the thing.
He didn't.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
He maybe understood your point, but he wasn't willing to
give in, so there was no resolution, which means you
keep coming back to the change. Yeah, okay, all right,
fair enough, thank you, Jessica. Thanks Well then that goes
back to Kiki and Polina's point, which is, well, then
just just agree with me and then we don't have
a problem.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
Hello, and we never talked about it. Everything's all good.
Speaker 5 (10:22):
On the right side.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
This is the press show.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
Sam is taking over Las Vegas this January for his
seven Night Presidents. He adobe live at Park MGM, and
we've got a trip for two to the January twenty
fifth show to night Hotel State at Park MGM January
twenty fourth through the twenty sixth and round trip airfare.
Text Remember to three seven three three seven now for
a chance to win. A confirmation text will be said.
(10:45):
Standard message data rates may apply. All thanks to Live Nation,
Dear blog. I said before a little while ago, I'm
not a liar, I'm not a cheater, and typically i'm not.
I don't I mean, i'm not. I'm a highly flawed individual,
but I don't lie and I don't cheat.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
But I did it. I cheated twice this week. I
almost cheated twice.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
This week on my non existent partnership with the lady
who sells me close at Nordstrom. And I'll tell you
what happened, and with my hairstylist, and I'll tell you
what happened. You know, we were on vacation for Thanksgiving
and been traveling a little bit. And you know, I'm
normally so organized, and I have all the stuff I need,
and like in this case, there was a warm there's
a warm climate to the trip, and there was a
(11:24):
cold climate to the trip.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
And I was all ready to go. I had two
separate bags.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
I had the cold climate bag, I had the warm
climate bag. I was ready, but I forgot a couple
of things in the in the cold climate bag. And
you can't compromise if you're cold, you're cold, you know.
And I think I forgot a pair of jeans or something.
So I went to the mall and I walked into
in this case Nordstrom, where I typically shop with one
person in one place, but I wasn't in that place,
(11:50):
so I had to go in there, and I had
to buy from somebody else, and I knew what I wanted.
I didn't Dealey Dally. I don't spent a lot of money,
but I felt extremely guilty the whole time, to the
point where I actually I texted Alexa and I said,
I have to tell you what I did today. I
was in the North Strim in Charlotte, North Carolina, and
I bought a pair of jeans, and I'm really sorry.
It was part of me the thought maybe she got
(12:11):
like alerted, or like if there was some kind of
salesperson alert, like where they tell you like, hey, he
just bought something from somebody else. But I felt really
bad because I try and be loyal and if I'm
going to go to that store, I try and planet
so I can go buy it from her. And then
I also kind of need a haircut. And then I walked
by a hair salon and I was like, if I
go in there and I just let him trim it
(12:32):
a little bit, just around the ears, the back, just
a little bit, I don't want him do anything drastic.
My hairstyle is Christy would know if I.
Speaker 5 (12:39):
Didn't, and that's a no, no, like that's you can't
do that.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
I mean, forget about the risk to my appearance, which
would be that the person might not be good at
cutting hair because I just walked by and I don't know,
but I literally looked in the window of this salon.
I was like, I can't do it. I just can't
do it, Like you can make me look stupid. Fine,
but if Christy found out that I cheated on her
and we had to have been out of necessity. It
wasn't like I was in the same city, in the
same building or something and I just went to somebody else.
(13:05):
Absolutely not. It's impossible. Same person's cut my hair for
fifteen years. It's not changing. But I didn't do it.
So I'm just gonna run around here looking ratty because
I'm afraid of offending my hairstylist.
Speaker 5 (13:18):
That's a good client. You're doing the right thing you are.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
But who else do you not cheat on? Like maybe
you don't cheat on you don't cheat on your hairstylist,
I really because if you do, unless it's an emergency
and then you show back up, it's I feel like
that's the ex that you broke up with and then
you come crawling back like, ah, sorry about that.
Speaker 4 (13:35):
It's always can you fix it? You know, like can
you fix you know, actually.
Speaker 2 (13:40):
Realizing experience you're like, you know what, I'm out of here.
I'm going somewhere else. They're gonna cut my hair better.
And then you go over there and cut your hair worse,
and then you got to come back with your head
down and be like I was wrong. Yep, yeah, you know,
and then you got to hope that it's take you back.
Speaker 4 (13:52):
You can't cheat on your hairstylist, your eyebrow, lady, my
bo't talk lady too.
Speaker 5 (13:57):
I put her up there. I do put her up there, yeah,
because otherwise I.
Speaker 7 (14:00):
Guess someone else poking me and it's not it's not
going to be good, and then I won't be the
ice woman that I want to be.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
You can't be all you can be.
Speaker 5 (14:06):
I can't be all I can be. That's right. I
had to be the best.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
But that would that be the sort of those are
the categories. Then I'm trying to think of anybody else.
You wouldn't want to cheat on my realtor. Oh iably
do that again?
Speaker 5 (14:16):
Yeah? Okay, yeah, because I waste a lot of time
with other realtors.
Speaker 7 (14:19):
And I'm like, my realtorter knows what I like already.
I don't know why I'm over here trying to like,
you know, go behind his back.
Speaker 5 (14:25):
Don't get me.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
I know, yeah, let me ask you qu if you have.
Speaker 2 (14:28):
And I've run into this before too, if you have
friends who are in certain industries, like, for example, I
was going to a different dentist. I was sleeping with her,
but I was going to her, and then when we
stopped sleeping together, I still went we were fine, she
had a nice job. But I have one of my
closest friends, Mike the lawyer is who has been mentioned
twice this week, which is just too many times for him,
(14:50):
but I his wife is a dentist, and so for
the longest time, it was why don't you come to me?
Speaker 1 (14:57):
Mike.
Speaker 2 (14:57):
Well, it turns out you're not a network, which means
it's gonna cost me eight thousand dollars. But I still,
finally I get I was guilted so many times that
I do go to her now and I pay the
I pay out a network money.
Speaker 5 (15:08):
That's crazy.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
I don't want to hear about it anymore. Every time
I see my buddy, you know so like and he's
a lawyer. I mean, so if you found out, like
let's say you're a real estate agent, you're really close
with somebody like Paulina, You're let's say your great friend
is a real estate agent, but yet you go to
some other real estate agent.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Like what is it?
Speaker 2 (15:26):
What are you really saying about your friend? Like you
are you obligated? Like if your friend's a hairstylist, are
you obligated? Hey, it's happening on that real housewive More
Mormon Housewives show, the Hulu one like where the lady
there's a little controversy has a hair brand.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
Now the Laila situation.
Speaker 2 (15:43):
Leila is an African American woman, and this woman has
admitted she doesn't know how to do African American hair.
So that was okay, and that actually, I'm spoiler larned.
It went well because the girl was like, yeah, actually
you should go to an expert because I don't know
what I'm doing.
Speaker 5 (15:55):
Probably it was a very powerful episode.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
It was probably would have been nice for her to
tell her that, but four right, she'd cut her hair
for years. But anyway, the point is these girls talk
amongst themselves about how this girl may not be that
good in hair, but they all go to her because
they're friends.
Speaker 5 (16:10):
Oh I'm not doing that.
Speaker 6 (16:11):
I spend so much time thinking about that situation because
herb hair business has been dragged so many times on
this show, and like, I just I don't know, as
like someone who doesn't know her, I wouldn't want to
go there at this point, which stings.
Speaker 1 (16:24):
But like when your own friends are like, yeah, we go,
but right.
Speaker 5 (16:28):
I don't believe in that.
Speaker 4 (16:29):
I'm sorry if the service is not good, I'll just
tell my friend, like I'm rooting for you.
Speaker 5 (16:33):
Keep getting better, you know they're not you get better,
you know.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
No, I'm here to support you, but not in the
way where you cut my hair exactly, not in the
way that you actually touched me.
Speaker 1 (16:46):
But I I wishing you the best right here for you. Yeah,
This is the Bread Show.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Zame is taking over in Las Vegas this January for
his seven night residents at Dobe Live at Park MGM,
and we've got a trip for two to the January
twenty fifth show to night Hotel State Park MGM January
twenty fourth through the twenty sixth and round trip airfare.
Text Remember to three seven three three seven now for
a chance to win. A confirmation text will be said.
(00:22):
Standard message of data rates may apply. All thanks to
Live Nation. Okay, I want to talk to Sam. Sam,
you and your husband you never fight. You've never fought.
Speaker 3 (00:33):
We've definitely had small arguments, but so many of them
have have not happened because of how we try to
prevent them and so like we've never had a full
out screaming match at each other. We've never you know,
said horrible things to each other in the middle of
a fight. Like do we sometimes have the occasional you know,
(00:55):
we walk around each other and don't talk, maybe for
a couple minutes. But I mean, we just do a
really good job of preventively avoiding the arguments from communicating.
Speaker 2 (01:05):
Because as a guy who's conflict avoidant, right, like, I
don't like to get a knockdown drag outs. And it's
not because I don't know if you should or shouldn't.
It's that I find that when you when it gets
to that point, especially if someone feels like they're behind
in the argument, then things start to shift into an
area they don't need to go. And maybe it's because
I grew up and my mom, as amazing as she is,
(01:28):
she was the person who would she'd go for the jugular,
like if she wanted the argument to end, she'd say
the thing that had nothing to do with anything, and
then it's like, oh and the argument's over. You win,
But then you got to walk back the thing that
you said that had nothing to do with the thing.
Which is why I think I'm conflict avoidant and I
don't get into I try not to get in fights
like that because it winds up you have to undo
(01:48):
the fight before you get back to the issue, which
I hate. However, I'm not sure that my way is
healthy where you never have the fight and I get
you know, yes, in a perfect world, it's like you, guys, Sam,
where it's just you know, you're able to have this
sort of discipline to know when to separate and to
know how to argue and to know how to debate,
but really never a big fight.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
No.
Speaker 3 (02:10):
But I think it also comes down to him and
I both had really toxic relationships before this, where like
we did fight with prior you know, partners, and so
now that we've seen how horrible it gets, we knew
right off the bat that we didn't want to repeat that,
especially in front of our daughter.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
And so we've we've done a.
Speaker 3 (02:30):
Lot of you know, communicating, talking how do we fix this?
And you know, do I want to punch him in
the face once in a while, one hundred percent, But
we learned that that's not really the right way to
do it, and it's it's worked out really well for us.
Speaker 1 (02:42):
So good for you guys. Thank you, Sam, have a
good day.
Speaker 4 (02:46):
Thanks you guys.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
Do love you guys, Thank you for listening.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
I mean, who am I to be? I may give
that relationship advice every day, and who am I to
do it? But I'm the first admit I'm not very
good at any of that. But I don't know. Maybe
for me, this story jumps out because as happy as
I am about the Travis Kelcey and Taylor Swift thing,
there's just no doubt in my mind, he's along for
the ride. And that's not to say she doesn't bring
him a lot in the relationship and that she hasn't
(03:10):
changed his life in a positive way in many ways,
I'm sure, but I contend that he's one of those
guys that just smiles ah, and it's just in awe
of her all the time, and that makes me nervous.
Speaker 5 (03:19):
Yeah, he's happy to be there.
Speaker 2 (03:21):
There's a difference between it being happy to be there
and and cowering. There's a difference between you know, letting.
Speaker 1 (03:29):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
There's part of me that anytime someone should just googoo goggon,
they're just looking at the stars the whole time and
we never fight and yeah, she's selling anything. It's part
of me that's like, Yeah, you can be the most
amazing person I've ever met, but I can still disagree
with you, and I can still sometimes see that you're
not perfect. And I wonder if the people who are
in the clouds don't they eventually come down from the clouds.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Yeah, I feel like.
Speaker 6 (03:52):
Two years is still a honeymoon phase, Like I don't
what I mean. Yeah, yeah, so I definitely think that
they'll get there, I'm sure. I mean, she's a fire sign.
I think he's a libra, which the fact that I
even maybe know that is crazy.
Speaker 5 (04:03):
But no, they'll get there.
Speaker 6 (04:05):
But I've been in like I've been in a five year,
a seven year, and I will say the first two
years are still for me the honeymoon.
Speaker 5 (04:12):
So maybe they're just they'll get there. George and themal
I don't. I don't know.
Speaker 6 (04:16):
George basically said, like I'm old, I don't have it
in me, Like what am I gonna argue about?
Speaker 5 (04:20):
I'm m sixties, So I don't know about them.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
But I can honestly tell you that I've been in
relationships before where the person I almost think had too
high of a regard for me, like like what like
I honestly I felt I felt like I could that
very often, but I felt like I could probably do anything,
(04:43):
and this person was gonna be like, Okay, you know
that's all right. I mean it's like they saw so
much good in me or something. But I'm sorry, but
it was a little bit unattractive because it's like, at
what point, And I'm not saying I tested that because
I'm not that kind of person, and I really like
I don't know. I'm not I'm not a liar, I'm
not deceptive. I don't cheat on do stuff like that.
(05:04):
I wasn't like, well, I'm gonna go out and cheats
if I can get away with it. But I just
I thought, like, I'm not that good of a dude,
like come on, like for you really, you know, like
you're you matter too. And I knew that, but sometimes
I felt like that person maybe wasn't putting themselves at
enough of a priority as enough of a priority, and
it was kind of unattractive.
Speaker 5 (05:24):
Yeah, I'm with you there.
Speaker 6 (05:26):
I'm not attracted to someone who just agrees with me
all the time and doesn't have an opinion.
Speaker 5 (05:29):
I'm definitely not into that.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
But Kiki and Paulina would be great with it.
Speaker 4 (05:32):
Yeah, I don't enjoy fighting. Like, I don't enjoy it.
I don't think it's a good time. I'm like, why
are we doing this? Like just just agree with me,
come on, man, you know it's not hard and I
don't ask for a lie, you know, So I don't
I don't enjoy fighting.
Speaker 5 (05:48):
It's it's actually like I don't like it at all.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Well, I guess would be you know, in a partnership
both people could eliminate. Like I said before, I'd say
maybe a quarter of the fights could be eliminated if
somebody would just shut up, which I'm not good at doing. However,
I also think that if you truly want every argument
in both of your relationships, every single one, I think
that at some point you might scratch your head and go,
(06:11):
why does this it's all I hate to say this,
but it's almost like where where what are they doing?
Speaker 1 (06:17):
Like why does it? You know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Like where are you getting this outlet? Like why do
I just win everything? Why do you not care?
Speaker 1 (06:23):
You know?
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Is it because like you don't, I don't know. It's
almost a bad thing.
Speaker 6 (06:28):
Yeah, I will say, if I start agreeing with everything
you do, then you know the relationship is about to
be over because I don't care anymore.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
I'm exhausted, or it's like I'm cheating on you, and
it's like I don't want to fight with you because
I'm trying to cover up this other thing. So like,
sure we'll go there, you just do that. Yes, you're
right about that, Yes I'm sorry about that. But a
bunch of texts about this, by the way, and again,
what the hell do I know? But someone said, I'm
a therapist and can tell you that a lot of
men are struggling with standing their ground against their partner
(06:57):
and they're fearful of being perceived as toxic or abusive. Oh, Fred,
you definitely have okay daddy energy. What does that mean?
Speaker 5 (07:06):
Okay, daddy, Okay daddy.
Speaker 1 (07:08):
I mean I got daddy issues. But I don't know.
Speaker 6 (07:10):
I think it means that like she would be in
a relationship with you and just say like, okay, daddy,
Oh now that's hot. Yeah you're so, she would agree
with you.
Speaker 2 (07:19):
I could shut my mouth a lot more. But I
also I also don't I would I would question myself
if everything someone did okay, because I feel like you're
trading off your value in some ways, and why are
you doing that? No, it's almost like do you have trauma,
(07:40):
like where you don't think you matter?
Speaker 7 (07:41):
No, Well, that's valid, But I was gonna say, like,
what if someone just doesn't like me? I'm very easy going.
I really don't care if we have you know, Chinese
or Mexican for dinner tonight?
Speaker 1 (07:49):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 7 (07:49):
Because sometimes, like I feel like even those things are
turned into arguments because then you don't feel hurt or seen.
Speaker 5 (07:54):
But like, what if I truly just want.
Speaker 7 (07:56):
To eat and I don't care, But now you think
I'm a punk because I won't stand on it, you know,
But I get it. If it's something bigger, like you know,
how are we going to raise our children or something
like you know where you want to send them to school?
Speaker 5 (08:06):
That's that's a different conversation. But I don't know.
Speaker 7 (08:08):
I just feel like, what's the point of fighting when
you can just meet your partner halfway and everybody's happy
it's given take?
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean that that does make sense. Julie.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
Hi, So you have been together since we were sixteen?
Hell are you now, Julie.
Speaker 8 (08:23):
Fifty five?
Speaker 1 (08:25):
Oh wow, I'm quick. Math, that's a long time.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
Forty yeah, four fifty gosh, what forty something years?
Speaker 1 (08:33):
And you've never you've never fought at all.
Speaker 8 (08:38):
We've had disagreements, but we've never had a yelling, screaming fight.
We've never had where we called each other names. I mean,
we've just never done it. We've gotten quiet, sometimes walked away,
but we don't fight.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (08:58):
Wow, Well, and you guys have been talk it out
so almost as long as I've been alive.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
So good for you. Congratulations.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
I mean, hey, you guys are just more mature and
maybe maybe certain people can just get lucky and they
meet their communications styles. His match, it looks like that's you, Julie.
Thank you, have a good day.
Speaker 8 (09:13):
Yes, thanks you.
Speaker 1 (09:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
Honestly, for me, the thing that jumped out about this
story was that he's in the clouds.
Speaker 1 (09:18):
He is not being realistic. Eat your right.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
He still is in a honeymoon phase and at some
point you're gonna wait and be like, yeah, Taylor, you're
pretty amazing, but your poop stinks too, girl, Jessica.
Speaker 1 (09:31):
Yeah, hi Jessica.
Speaker 2 (09:33):
So you think appeasing and sort of like giving in
to your partner consistently would lead to more fights?
Speaker 9 (09:40):
Yeah, it was early on in mine and my husband's relationship.
But he would just be like, Okay, fine, I don't
want to fight anymore, and then we would have the
same fight over and over again, and I'm like, wait,
I thought when we stopped fighting that nant you understood,
and we would stop fighting about that, But he would
just continue to do it because he was just like whatever,
I don't care.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
Yeah, because he didn't really want to do the thing.
He didn't.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
He maybe understood your point, but he wasn't willing to
give in, so there was no resolution, which means you
keep coming back to the change. Yeah, okay, all right,
fair enough, thank you, Jessica. Thanks Well then that goes
back to Kiki and Polina's point, which is, well, then
just just agree with me and then we don't have
a problem.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
Hello, and we never talked about it. Everything's all good.
Speaker 5 (10:22):
On the right side.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
This is the press show.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
Sam is taking over Las Vegas this January for his
seven Night Presidents. He adobe live at Park MGM, and
we've got a trip for two to the January twenty
fifth show to night Hotel State at Park MGM January
twenty fourth through the twenty sixth and round trip airfare.
Text Remember to three seven three three seven now for
a chance to win. A confirmation text will be said.
(10:45):
Standard message data rates may apply. All thanks to Live Nation,
Dear blog. I said before a little while ago, I'm
not a liar, I'm not a cheater, and typically i'm not.
I don't I mean, i'm not. I'm a highly flawed individual,
but I don't lie and I don't cheat.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
But I did it. I cheated twice this week. I
almost cheated twice.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
This week on my non existent partnership with the lady
who sells me close at Nordstrom. And I'll tell you
what happened, and with my hairstylist, and I'll tell you
what happened. You know, we were on vacation for Thanksgiving
and been traveling a little bit. And you know, I'm
normally so organized, and I have all the stuff I need,
and like in this case, there was a warm there's
a warm climate to the trip, and there was a
(11:24):
cold climate to the trip.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
And I was all ready to go. I had two
separate bags.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
I had the cold climate bag, I had the warm
climate bag. I was ready, but I forgot a couple
of things in the in the cold climate bag. And
you can't compromise if you're cold, you're cold, you know.
And I think I forgot a pair of jeans or something.
So I went to the mall and I walked into
in this case Nordstrom, where I typically shop with one
person in one place, but I wasn't in that place,
(11:50):
so I had to go in there, and I had
to buy from somebody else, and I knew what I wanted.
I didn't Dealey Dally. I don't spent a lot of money,
but I felt extremely guilty the whole time, to the
point where I actually I texted Alexa and I said,
I have to tell you what I did today. I
was in the North Strim in Charlotte, North Carolina, and
I bought a pair of jeans, and I'm really sorry.
It was part of me the thought maybe she got
(12:11):
like alerted, or like if there was some kind of
salesperson alert, like where they tell you like, hey, he
just bought something from somebody else. But I felt really
bad because I try and be loyal and if I'm
going to go to that store, I try and planet
so I can go buy it from her. And then
I also kind of need a haircut. And then I walked
by a hair salon and I was like, if I
go in there and I just let him trim it
(12:32):
a little bit, just around the ears, the back, just
a little bit, I don't want him do anything drastic.
My hairstyle is Christy would know if I.
Speaker 5 (12:39):
Didn't, and that's a no, no, like that's you can't
do that.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
I mean, forget about the risk to my appearance, which
would be that the person might not be good at
cutting hair because I just walked by and I don't know,
but I literally looked in the window of this salon.
I was like, I can't do it. I just can't
do it, Like you can make me look stupid. Fine,
but if Christy found out that I cheated on her
and we had to have been out of necessity. It
wasn't like I was in the same city, in the
same building or something and I just went to somebody else.
(13:05):
Absolutely not. It's impossible. Same person's cut my hair for
fifteen years. It's not changing. But I didn't do it.
So I'm just gonna run around here looking ratty because
I'm afraid of offending my hairstylist.
Speaker 5 (13:18):
That's a good client. You're doing the right thing you are.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
But who else do you not cheat on? Like maybe
you don't cheat on you don't cheat on your hairstylist,
I really because if you do, unless it's an emergency
and then you show back up, it's I feel like
that's the ex that you broke up with and then
you come crawling back like, ah, sorry about that.
Speaker 4 (13:35):
It's always can you fix it? You know, like can
you fix you know, actually.
Speaker 2 (13:40):
Realizing experience you're like, you know what, I'm out of here.
I'm going somewhere else. They're gonna cut my hair better.
And then you go over there and cut your hair worse,
and then you got to come back with your head
down and be like I was wrong. Yep, yeah, you know,
and then you got to hope that it's take you back.
Speaker 4 (13:52):
You can't cheat on your hairstylist, your eyebrow, lady, my
bo't talk lady too.
Speaker 5 (13:57):
I put her up there. I do put her up there, yeah,
because otherwise I.
Speaker 7 (14:00):
Guess someone else poking me and it's not it's not
going to be good, and then I won't be the
ice woman that I want to be.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
You can't be all you can be.
Speaker 5 (14:06):
I can't be all I can be. That's right. I
had to be the best.
Speaker 2 (14:09):
But that would that be the sort of those are
the categories. Then I'm trying to think of anybody else.
You wouldn't want to cheat on my realtor. Oh iably
do that again?
Speaker 5 (14:16):
Yeah? Okay, yeah, because I waste a lot of time
with other realtors.
Speaker 7 (14:19):
And I'm like, my realtorter knows what I like already.
I don't know why I'm over here trying to like,
you know, go behind his back.
Speaker 5 (14:25):
Don't get me.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
I know, yeah, let me ask you qu if you have.
Speaker 2 (14:28):
And I've run into this before too, if you have
friends who are in certain industries, like, for example, I
was going to a different dentist. I was sleeping with her,
but I was going to her, and then when we
stopped sleeping together, I still went we were fine, she
had a nice job. But I have one of my
closest friends, Mike the lawyer is who has been mentioned
twice this week, which is just too many times for him,
(14:50):
but I his wife is a dentist, and so for
the longest time, it was why don't you come to me?
Speaker 1 (14:57):
Mike.
Speaker 2 (14:57):
Well, it turns out you're not a network, which means
it's gonna cost me eight thousand dollars. But I still,
finally I get I was guilted so many times that
I do go to her now and I pay the
I pay out a network money.
Speaker 5 (15:08):
That's crazy.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
I don't want to hear about it anymore. Every time
I see my buddy, you know so like and he's
a lawyer. I mean, so if you found out, like
let's say you're a real estate agent, you're really close
with somebody like Paulina, You're let's say your great friend
is a real estate agent, but yet you go to
some other real estate agent.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Like what is it?
Speaker 2 (15:26):
What are you really saying about your friend? Like you
are you obligated? Like if your friend's a hairstylist, are
you obligated? Hey, it's happening on that real housewive More
Mormon Housewives show, the Hulu one like where the lady
there's a little controversy has a hair brand.
Speaker 1 (15:41):
Now the Laila situation.
Speaker 2 (15:43):
Leila is an African American woman, and this woman has
admitted she doesn't know how to do African American hair.
So that was okay, and that actually, I'm spoiler larned.
It went well because the girl was like, yeah, actually
you should go to an expert because I don't know
what I'm doing.
Speaker 5 (15:55):
Probably it was a very powerful episode.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
It was probably would have been nice for her to
tell her that, but four right, she'd cut her hair
for years. But anyway, the point is these girls talk
amongst themselves about how this girl may not be that
good in hair, but they all go to her because
they're friends.
Speaker 5 (16:10):
Oh I'm not doing that.
Speaker 6 (16:11):
I spend so much time thinking about that situation because
herb hair business has been dragged so many times on
this show, and like, I just I don't know, as
like someone who doesn't know her, I wouldn't want to
go there at this point, which stings.
Speaker 1 (16:24):
But like when your own friends are like, yeah, we go,
but right.
Speaker 5 (16:28):
I don't believe in that.
Speaker 4 (16:29):
I'm sorry if the service is not good, I'll just
tell my friend, like I'm rooting for you.
Speaker 5 (16:33):
Keep getting better, you know they're not you get better,
you know.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
No, I'm here to support you, but not in the
way where you cut my hair exactly, not in the
way that you actually touched me.
Speaker 1 (16:46):
But I I wishing you the best right here for you. Yeah,
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Are You A Charlotte?
In 1997, actress Kristin Davis’ life was forever changed when she took on the role of Charlotte York in Sex and the City. As we watched Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte navigate relationships in NYC, the show helped push once unacceptable conversation topics out of the shadows and altered the narrative around women and sex. We all saw ourselves in them as they searched for fulfillment in life, sex and friendships. Now, Kristin Davis wants to connect with you, the fans, and share untold stories and all the behind the scenes. Together, with Kristin and special guests, what will begin with Sex and the City will evolve into talks about themes that are still so relevant today. "Are you a Charlotte?" is much more than just rewatching this beloved show, it brings the past and the present together as we talk with heart, humor and of course some optimism.
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