August 19, 2025 • 8 mins
Jason tells us why you should never trust a fart!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is the press show.
Speaker 2 (00:01):
Let's get you Hotel a trip for tunis e Jennifer
Lopez her brand new Las Vegas residency. Jennifer Lopez Up
All Night Live in Las Vegas March thirteenth, twenty twenty
six at the Coliseum at Caesar's Palace, Texas Night to
three seven three three seven Right now for a chance
to win two tickets to the March thirteenth show at
two Night Hotels Day March twelfth through the fourteenth, at
(00:24):
Key Flamingo Hotel Casino, Las Vegas and at the Brown
tre Fair Fair. A confirmation text will be sent Denner's
message and data rates may apply. All Thanks Live Nation
tickets are on sale now at ticketmaster dot com for
all shows running December thirtieth through January third, and March
sixth through the twenty eighth. I'm not sure where I
want to start today as I look at our little
sheet boy, do I not know? Is it Jason I
(00:47):
pooped the bed last night? Or is it Kaitlin I'm
going to see Rob Thomas. To me, those are the
same things.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
It's giving the same energy.
Speaker 2 (00:56):
If you, if one of you can come up with
your own idea that would be. I mean honest, back
to back, y'all just writeing the same thing. I guess
we'll do both. Jason, are you see it? You really did?
I did?
Speaker 1 (01:08):
I pooped the bad List?
Speaker 2 (01:09):
What? Like?
Speaker 1 (01:12):
How you guys?
Speaker 2 (01:14):
How is it? I mean, I'm not even trying to
like make this like you know, dirty humor, but it's
like I got to understand how this is. This happens
to you guys, and it doesn't happen to me, And
I'm not above it.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
I'm not above it. I just it just I don't understand.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
Yeah, I've had some accidents in the past, but this
was the first time that I will say it was like, yeah,
like some you know, oopsies like in the past, or
you know, you fly into the sun and you get burned,
you know, but this one.
Speaker 2 (01:45):
Like how how without getting too far into it, like
can you now?
Speaker 3 (01:51):
So we laid down to go to sleep, and oh good,
so so Mike the Mechanic was with you. Yeah, we
were all nestled in the dogs, you know, rendy for
a good night's slumber, and I trusted a fart and
I shouldn't have and I pooped myself.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
I'm for once in my life, I'm speechless constitution.
Speaker 3 (02:21):
I know, but this one, like normally you could tell,
especially when you have like I probably either am lactose
intolerant or have IBS, so you learn to know, like okay, like, oh,
this is not gonna be a good one like I
should normally.
Speaker 1 (02:34):
I'm like, you know, a gallon of milk before you
went to bed? I mean, what, like what did you?
What are you doing? I made dinner. I had a
lot of cheese in it.
Speaker 3 (02:43):
And so even though I think I'm lactose intolerantor refused
to not eat cheese, because like, who could ever give
cheese up?
Speaker 1 (02:49):
Right? So you know, I.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
The bed next to my partner, I probably that might be.
That might be what would do it for me? That
might be the deciding factor as far as I got
to tell you, I feel like if I went in
a relationship, I would be the skinniest person alive because
I think there's a lot of stuff that I do
now that I wouldn't do in front of someone else. Like,
first of all, I wouldn't order like two full meals
(03:14):
you know, door dash and to eat them.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
I wouldn't.
Speaker 2 (03:16):
There's food that I get a little risky with it
at home I know it's gonna make my stomach grumble,
like you know, ice cream or whatever, cheese, And I
do it anyway because you know what if I if
I walk around the house, you know, with a little
twot tuoed every now and again, nobody would know it
because I'm alone. But but if I were with someone else,
I feel like I would eat less because I'd be
afraid of judgment. And I feel like I would also
(03:37):
be very careful about, you know, any risky food. So
this is my this is the more important question. How
did you? How did you eloquently and gracefully remove yourself
from this situation?
Speaker 1 (03:49):
Like how what happens next?
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Because you got military excuse me, not military mic, that
would be a fantasy of your.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Excuse you, Mi mechanic.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
Yeah, we got a lot of mics around here, but
we got Mike the mechanic in bed with you.
Speaker 1 (04:01):
How this happened? Like what do you?
Speaker 2 (04:04):
What do you do next?
Speaker 3 (04:05):
So a lot of different options ran through my mind
very quickly, like do I first tell him and then
take care of it? Or do I go take care
of it and then tell him? So I got up immediately.
I decided to choose option B. Ran to the bathroom
to take care of it. I said nothing, just ran
(04:26):
in the bathroom took another shower. So he's probably like,
what the heck is going on. Then I came back
out and I was like, I need you to get up,
and he's like why, and I'm like, just just get up,
like I have to change the sheet. Just get up,
and he's like, what happened to the dogs and something?
I was like, no, just get up.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
I finally I had to landed on the dogs, led
on the dogs. It was not a dog. It was
not a dog situation. So I was like, what is what?
Like what I don't understand. You have to get up,
and so he was like what he told him. I
was like, he's like, do you need it? Depends? I
was like, maybe just get out, let me fix it.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
Like he went and he laid on the couch and
I had to like course him to come back to bed.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
I was like, can you come back to bed? He's like,
you pooped in the bed.
Speaker 3 (05:14):
I'm like, I know, but it wasn't an accident, Okay,
Like I'm sorry, it was clean it up.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
Come back to.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
Bed, right.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
So he threw everything in the washir and then God
bless his soul, because if if some person forced their
way into my house and wouldn't leave for fourteen years
and then pooped in my bed, I would one hundred
percent kick him out, like cops called this person as
a squatter, like get out here at like straight to jail,
right like one hundred percent. But that man got back
(05:40):
into bed and we went to sleep.
Speaker 2 (05:44):
I mean, Jason, I don't know what to do. There's Chason,
no judgment. I want you to know there's no judgment.
This is a safe place. But I really don't understand
how this happens to certain people in the show and
not others. I just I don't. And then the ones
that it happens to you guys insist it's commonplace, and
it's just not. It's not.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
I hate to break it to you. Everyone but Kiki
had it happened to them?
Speaker 3 (06:10):
Oh, I know, I never crapped the bed, No, I have, right,
I'm just the honest one that's going to talk about it.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
Why I'm honestly not lying about this. I think you've
heard some of the stories I've told over the years
that are highly embarrassing. I wouldn't have any issue admitting
this I just I don't know why we're playing Russian
Roulette with our booties. I don't know why, Like, why
are we playing with fire? Like if there's any chance,
why why are we? Like?
Speaker 1 (06:41):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
Maybe it'll be fine, and then that you learned an
important lesson. You know, No, you didn't, because it's happened before.
I've never pooped in the bad.
Speaker 3 (06:52):
This is this is this is the first time ever
since it might be I think there needs to be
some changes, and by changes, I'm not giving up cheese.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
I will just buy some depends.
Speaker 2 (07:03):
Wow, Jason, we've all brought you together. We brought you
together here because your your behavior is affecting us negatively
in the following ways, like the mechanics in the hallway.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
He'd like to come in and talk to you. Running out,
I'm running around because we love you.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
Yes, yes, you have to run around the parking lot
of the express walk. Well, the van for for bed poopers, Anonymous,
you know, waits for you. I need you to accept
help now, Jason. I'm not going I just oh, man,
I just I woke up today and I opened our
little document and the first thing it says, there, Jason,
(07:44):
I pooped the bed last night. Dear to help, help, help, Hell,
you claim you need help, but like this, you're a
repeat offender, sus up every time.
Speaker 1 (07:59):
Never. God, you know, I don't know what to do.
This just at work. Yeah, I don't know what to do.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
I got to move on. I can't.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
I can't.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
And Cal's going to Rob Thomas concert. We'll get back
to that. I mean, it's pretty much same thing, but
we'll get back to that in a minute. I've got,
as you know, I I Taylor the biggest stories of
the day to you guys. You know, I want to
make sure that you're fully informed. I have a tailor
story today, I have new words to teach you today.
And I have a lab Bubu story for you today
This is the press show.
Speaker 2 (00:01):
Let's get you Hotel a trip for tunis e Jennifer
Lopez her brand new Las Vegas residency. Jennifer Lopez Up
All Night Live in Las Vegas March thirteenth, twenty twenty
six at the Coliseum at Caesar's Palace, Texas Night to
three seven three three seven Right now for a chance
to win two tickets to the March thirteenth show at
two Night Hotels Day March twelfth through the fourteenth, at
(00:24):
Key Flamingo Hotel Casino, Las Vegas and at the Brown
tre Fair Fair. A confirmation text will be sent Denner's
message and data rates may apply. All Thanks Live Nation
tickets are on sale now at ticketmaster dot com for
all shows running December thirtieth through January third, and March
sixth through the twenty eighth. I'm not sure where I
want to start today as I look at our little
sheet boy, do I not know? Is it Jason I
(00:47):
pooped the bed last night? Or is it Kaitlin I'm
going to see Rob Thomas. To me, those are the
same things.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
It's giving the same energy.
Speaker 2 (00:56):
If you, if one of you can come up with
your own idea that would be. I mean honest, back
to back, y'all just writeing the same thing. I guess
we'll do both. Jason, are you see it? You really did?
I did?
Speaker 1 (01:08):
I pooped the bad List?
Speaker 2 (01:09):
What? Like?
Speaker 1 (01:12):
How you guys?
Speaker 2 (01:14):
How is it? I mean, I'm not even trying to
like make this like you know, dirty humor, but it's
like I got to understand how this is. This happens
to you guys, and it doesn't happen to me, And
I'm not above it.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
I'm not above it. I just it just I don't understand.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
Yeah, I've had some accidents in the past, but this
was the first time that I will say it was like, yeah,
like some you know, oopsies like in the past, or
you know, you fly into the sun and you get burned,
you know, but this one.
Speaker 2 (01:45):
Like how how without getting too far into it, like
can you now?
Speaker 3 (01:51):
So we laid down to go to sleep, and oh good,
so so Mike the Mechanic was with you. Yeah, we
were all nestled in the dogs, you know, rendy for
a good night's slumber, and I trusted a fart and
I shouldn't have and I pooped myself.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
I'm for once in my life, I'm speechless constitution.
Speaker 3 (02:21):
I know, but this one, like normally you could tell,
especially when you have like I probably either am lactose
intolerant or have IBS, so you learn to know, like okay, like, oh,
this is not gonna be a good one like I
should normally.
Speaker 1 (02:34):
I'm like, you know, a gallon of milk before you
went to bed? I mean, what, like what did you?
What are you doing? I made dinner. I had a
lot of cheese in it.
Speaker 3 (02:43):
And so even though I think I'm lactose intolerantor refused
to not eat cheese, because like, who could ever give
cheese up?
Speaker 1 (02:49):
Right? So you know, I.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
The bed next to my partner, I probably that might be.
That might be what would do it for me? That
might be the deciding factor as far as I got
to tell you, I feel like if I went in
a relationship, I would be the skinniest person alive because
I think there's a lot of stuff that I do
now that I wouldn't do in front of someone else. Like,
first of all, I wouldn't order like two full meals
(03:14):
you know, door dash and to eat them.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
I wouldn't.
Speaker 2 (03:16):
There's food that I get a little risky with it
at home I know it's gonna make my stomach grumble,
like you know, ice cream or whatever, cheese, And I
do it anyway because you know what if I if
I walk around the house, you know, with a little
twot tuoed every now and again, nobody would know it
because I'm alone. But but if I were with someone else,
I feel like I would eat less because I'd be
afraid of judgment. And I feel like I would also
(03:37):
be very careful about, you know, any risky food. So
this is my this is the more important question. How
did you? How did you eloquently and gracefully remove yourself
from this situation?
Speaker 1 (03:49):
Like how what happens next?
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Because you got military excuse me, not military mic, that
would be a fantasy of your.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Excuse you, Mi mechanic.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
Yeah, we got a lot of mics around here, but
we got Mike the mechanic in bed with you.
Speaker 1 (04:01):
How this happened? Like what do you?
Speaker 2 (04:04):
What do you do next?
Speaker 3 (04:05):
So a lot of different options ran through my mind
very quickly, like do I first tell him and then
take care of it? Or do I go take care
of it and then tell him? So I got up immediately.
I decided to choose option B. Ran to the bathroom
to take care of it. I said nothing, just ran
(04:26):
in the bathroom took another shower. So he's probably like,
what the heck is going on. Then I came back
out and I was like, I need you to get up,
and he's like why, and I'm like, just just get up,
like I have to change the sheet. Just get up,
and he's like, what happened to the dogs and something?
I was like, no, just get up.
Speaker 1 (04:44):
I finally I had to landed on the dogs, led
on the dogs. It was not a dog. It was
not a dog situation. So I was like, what is what?
Like what I don't understand. You have to get up,
and so he was like what he told him. I
was like, he's like, do you need it? Depends? I
was like, maybe just get out, let me fix it.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
Like he went and he laid on the couch and
I had to like course him to come back to bed.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
I was like, can you come back to bed? He's like,
you pooped in the bed.
Speaker 3 (05:14):
I'm like, I know, but it wasn't an accident, Okay,
Like I'm sorry, it was clean it up.
Speaker 1 (05:18):
Come back to.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
Bed, right.
Speaker 3 (05:19):
So he threw everything in the washir and then God
bless his soul, because if if some person forced their
way into my house and wouldn't leave for fourteen years
and then pooped in my bed, I would one hundred
percent kick him out, like cops called this person as
a squatter, like get out here at like straight to jail,
right like one hundred percent. But that man got back
(05:40):
into bed and we went to sleep.
Speaker 2 (05:44):
I mean, Jason, I don't know what to do. There's Chason,
no judgment. I want you to know there's no judgment.
This is a safe place. But I really don't understand
how this happens to certain people in the show and
not others. I just I don't. And then the ones
that it happens to you guys insist it's commonplace, and
it's just not. It's not.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
I hate to break it to you. Everyone but Kiki
had it happened to them?
Speaker 3 (06:10):
Oh, I know, I never crapped the bed, No, I have, right,
I'm just the honest one that's going to talk about it.
Speaker 2 (06:19):
Why I'm honestly not lying about this. I think you've
heard some of the stories I've told over the years
that are highly embarrassing. I wouldn't have any issue admitting
this I just I don't know why we're playing Russian
Roulette with our booties. I don't know why, Like, why
are we playing with fire? Like if there's any chance,
why why are we? Like?
Speaker 1 (06:41):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
Maybe it'll be fine, and then that you learned an
important lesson. You know, No, you didn't, because it's happened before.
I've never pooped in the bad.
Speaker 3 (06:52):
This is this is this is the first time ever
since it might be I think there needs to be
some changes, and by changes, I'm not giving up cheese.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
I will just buy some depends.
Speaker 2 (07:03):
Wow, Jason, we've all brought you together. We brought you
together here because your your behavior is affecting us negatively
in the following ways, like the mechanics in the hallway.
Speaker 1 (07:16):
He'd like to come in and talk to you. Running out,
I'm running around because we love you.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
Yes, yes, you have to run around the parking lot
of the express walk. Well, the van for for bed poopers, Anonymous,
you know, waits for you. I need you to accept
help now, Jason. I'm not going I just oh, man,
I just I woke up today and I opened our
little document and the first thing it says, there, Jason,
(07:44):
I pooped the bed last night. Dear to help, help, help, Hell,
you claim you need help, but like this, you're a
repeat offender, sus up every time.
Speaker 1 (07:59):
Never. God, you know, I don't know what to do.
This just at work. Yeah, I don't know what to do.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
I got to move on. I can't.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
I can't.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
And Cal's going to Rob Thomas concert. We'll get back
to that. I mean, it's pretty much same thing, but
we'll get back to that in a minute. I've got,
as you know, I I Taylor the biggest stories of
the day to you guys. You know, I want to
make sure that you're fully informed. I have a tailor
story today, I have new words to teach you today.
And I have a lab Bubu story for you today
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