Parents Giving You Chores!

Fred and the crew talk about the chores they did growing up!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
I wanted to bring this up because my mom listens
to the show every day, and I wish I could
see the look on my parents' face when I do
this story. I wish I could, and I want your
genuine reaction, especially if your I don't know, twenty thirties forties,
you grew up with siblings.

Speaker 2 (00:14):
I know Caitlin did. Caitlyn.

Speaker 1 (00:16):
You practically were a second mom because of the age
difference twelve years thirteen years difference between you and Belle,
your sister. She's younger. A TikToker known as Shira is
making waves with her bold stance. Why do I believe
that she might be in her early twenties. I've never
seen this woman. I hate to say this, this is
a generational take, but parents are going to shiver or

(00:40):
older siblings her bold stance. Parents shouldn't make their kids
babysit younger siblings without consent and compensation.

Speaker 2 (00:50):
Yeah, I mean, you were a big sister too.

Speaker 1 (00:52):
Can you imagine, Pauline, if Mama Marta had been like, Hey,
I'm heading out tonight with my cigarettes and.

Speaker 2 (01:01):
Virginia.

Speaker 1 (01:02):
Yeah Salem, So I was gonna say Virginia slims, But
Salem flim going out with the girls tonight.

Speaker 2 (01:07):
You gotta watch your sister.

Speaker 1 (01:08):
And you were like, first of all, I didn't consent
to that, and second and second of all, what will
my compensation package looks like? Can you imagine now? Look
like my My parents are very smart. My parents are
very smart. I have my sister seven and a half
years younger, and they were not They were no dummy.
You know. On my birthday they were were extremely generous.
They gave me a brand new car. On my birthday,
they gave me a brand new car. Was so I

(01:30):
couldn't believe it, Like I was convinced that I wasn't
getting a car. I was convinced that their deal was,
you got two years to make money in the summer
and whatever amount of money you can make, we'll we'll
match that and you can buy a car with it.

Speaker 2 (01:43):
Well, I didn't make it.

Speaker 1 (01:44):
I didn't make that much money, so I wouldn't be
I didn't think I was getting a car. I got
a car. Boom Immediately, here are the keys. Oh my god, yay, congratulations,
take your sister to dance, Go get me some at
the store. Hey, go go pick up so and so
and so and so at the airport. Hey, you do
do very smart. It was what an investment in the
quality of life of their own quality of life? Yeah,

(02:05):
extremely generous. I'm extremely grateful. I will do the exact
same thing if I ever have a kid. It'll be like,
oh sweet, and this is before uber and everything.

Speaker 2 (02:14):
Hey, go pick up the Chinese food or whatever. And
for a.

Speaker 1 (02:17):
Little while you're like, oh, I get to drive, Like
I get to drive, And after a while you're like,
I don't want to go to dance practice again. But
if I had told my parents, like, what's in it
for me? You know, well, what are you to pay
me for that? We'll be like, I don't know. How
about the air you're breathing? How about you know what
you're wearing right now? How about that car? How about

(02:38):
the how about how about you know, eating, sustenance, education,
how about love? Can you imagine, Caitlin, if you had
been like, well, you know, I don't know. First of all,
I didn't agree to that, And second, oh my god,
can you imagine telling your parents I don't consent to that.

Speaker 3 (02:55):
Absolutely, And I had enough forethought to go like, I mean, yeah,
sometimes it was frustrating because I was like, fully like
we had like a drop.

Speaker 4 (03:04):
Off pickup schedule.

Speaker 3 (03:05):
I was getting her from school, like I always had
a car seat in my backseat.

Speaker 4 (03:08):
I looked like a teen mom in high school.

Speaker 3 (03:09):
But I just I had enough forthought to go okay,
Like my parents have given me so.

Speaker 4 (03:15):
Much, Like the least I can do is like help
them out.

Speaker 2 (03:19):
Yeah, I know.

Speaker 1 (03:20):
I know that as a kid, I was not grateful
enough because I didn't have any I didn't have the
perspective to realize like how hard it was for them
to provide the things they did. And I also was
around kids who had as much or more than me,
so it wasn't I had no example of how it
could look and in retrospect, like, I'm just so grateful
for all the things that they did. But I even then,

(03:41):
even as a little snot nose, little entitled kid, I
knew better than to ask my parents to compensate me.
Can you imagine if you told her, like, here's your
your older sister takes you in when your mom passes away,
and then and then she's already got kids, and there
are always kids, and so can you imagine if Helena
had been like, hey, I need you to do this

(04:02):
Makitha and you're like, well, well right, No.

Speaker 5 (04:09):
I would never do that for Helena. But I because
I had a.

Speaker 6 (04:13):
Friend who was really like a second mom to all
of her siblings, and like we would have parties to
go to the skating rink and I would be like,
are you on duty tonight?

Speaker 5 (04:21):
Like can you come out?

Speaker 6 (04:22):
You know, like I gotta watch the kids, And I'm like,
your mom had all those kids, that's not your responsibility.
So some parents, they really do put a lot of
responsibility on the oldest.

Speaker 5 (04:33):
Yeah, the oldest sibling, y'all are the strongest soldiers for real.

Speaker 2 (04:36):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (04:36):
No, it's you say, it's like you need to be
an oldest sibling.

Speaker 3 (04:40):
I think in a lot of ways, but it's we
don't choose it, and that's okay, you know, but yeah,
some parents.

Speaker 4 (04:46):
Do take advantage of it.

Speaker 3 (04:47):
I mean we had bell I would throw parties in
the basement and Bella would be down there with her
bottle getting passed around by like all right, that's just
you know, I mean.

Speaker 5 (04:55):
That's what we would do.

Speaker 6 (04:56):
We would just go to my friend's house and babysit
at her house.

Speaker 2 (04:58):
We would all hang out.

Speaker 5 (04:59):
But we you know, if.

Speaker 1 (05:02):
You're treating the oldest sibling like a nanny, that's one thing.
But if you're just being asked to help out around
the house because that's what family does, and you're over
here going mmm yeah. In her viral video, she emphasizes
that children are not free labor and should not be
assigned adult responsibilities like cooking, cleaning, or babysitting without agreement.

Speaker 2 (05:24):
What are you talking about? Where are you going to live?

Speaker 6 (05:28):
Like?

Speaker 1 (05:29):
What are you how exactly are you expected to survive?

Speaker 2 (05:32):
Like?

Speaker 1 (05:32):
Your parents are also not I mean, while I think
a lot of parents probably feel like it, they're not
like your servants, right, Like you still have to be
a functioning member of a family, of a unit, like
if your parents expect you to keep your stuff in
order or they you know. I remember my parents used
to be like, your only job is to go to
school and get good grades. That's the only thing you
have to do. So I can do it, man, It's

(05:55):
like that's it. And I remember the time I thought
that was such a such an undertaking.

Speaker 2 (06:00):
Yes, my parents.

Speaker 1 (06:02):
My dad used to say to me almost every night, Man,
what I wouldn't give to go back to school? Yeah?
And I'm like, yeah, you and your stupid line. That's dumb,
that's dumb. I want out of here, I want out
of this prison. And you know what, what I wouldn't
give to go back to school and learn more stuff.

Speaker 2 (06:17):
Seriously, the freedom, honey.

Speaker 1 (06:18):
I think the difference is I would I would choose
what I wanted to learn and it would be on
my terms as opposed to what they make you learn
and at the time. But again, you know, youth is
wasted on a young perspective. But my god, if I'd say, yeah,
I don't know about that, Okay, well, then the dinner
will be seventeen dollars, then I mean because they flip
it on you too.

Speaker 5 (06:37):
That's true.

Speaker 1 (06:37):
Yes, they chose to have you, But I don't think
that means that you don't have any obligation to be
a part of a unit, right right.

Speaker 5 (06:43):
Yeah, don't take advantage.

Speaker 7 (06:45):
No, my mom would send me back to Poland, like
with a one weight ticket back like I'm from there,
but she would send me there with my grandma. She's
threatened me before when I was a kid, many of times,
like when I didn't want to help out around the
house or with my sibling or whatever, like we're four
years apart, not that much of a difference, but I
was older.

Speaker 2 (06:59):
You would have to build that that you were.

Speaker 7 (07:02):
Farm literally, my mom came from a farm with nothing,
crap in a hole like she did, like, I.

Speaker 2 (07:09):
Need milk for my cereal. We'll then go milk it every.

Speaker 7 (07:12):
Morning, Yes exactly. She climb mountains to get to school.
I heard all about it.

Speaker 1 (07:16):
Both ways uphill, which was crazy. I had no idea
that geography in Poland was that way. Everything is uphill
all the.

Speaker 2 (07:22):
Time, all the time walk. I'm like, oh my god, I.

Speaker 1 (07:26):
Just cannot imagine. I cannot imagine responding like that. My
dad would, my my mom really would have whooped me.

Speaker 3 (07:33):
Where do they think this like code of conduct that
they're like aligning two comes from? Because you're you're under
your parents house, your parents' rule. Like, where do you
think your rights are coming from? You have no rights?

Speaker 2 (07:43):
Yeah, I don't know your child of course.

Speaker 1 (07:47):
Huge discussions now on her post about the balance between
family responsibilities and children's rights. Some argue that helping out
is it part of growing up. Others believe that imposing
such duties without consent can lead to resentment and hinder
personal development in some ways. I think it developed me,
you know, and there was even stuff that they would
they would have me do and pay me for that

(08:08):
I probably should have just done. But I also had
no means of making money, and I think, you know,
before a certain age went, you can't.

Speaker 2 (08:14):
Get a job. The very day I could get a job.
I got a job.

Speaker 1 (08:17):
But I feel like, you know, knowing the law, and
they get me, which they claim I never did.

Speaker 2 (08:22):
It's outrageous.

Speaker 1 (08:23):
They argue, up and down, you never ever did that,
and I'm like, no, no, I did that for years.
It's so crazy. I'm like, where do you think I
made that up? Like I remember the hiking boots I
wore to mow the law and I remember I remember,
you know, if the sprink corst had gone off, I
couldn't anyway, don't get me started on this trauma.

Speaker 3 (08:43):
Parents don't like if you say anything happened other than
like amazingness, They're like, no, that is so, I'm not even.

Speaker 2 (08:49):
Mad about it. I'm not mad.

Speaker 1 (08:51):
I tell the joke all the time that now that
I have grown up money, I want to buy a
riding lawnmower because they wouldn't let me have one, and
I want to just ride it around my parking griage
because I can have it if I want it. Yeah,
Big Album Home Depot will hook me up with a discount.
Even it's amazing, But my mom calls me, you never
mowed the lawn, like what are you talking about? Anyway,
But they would pay me, like I think whatever. They'd
pay me twenty dollars to do that. And the reason

(09:13):
they would I probably shouldn't have. They probably shouldn't have
paid me twenty dollars. They probably should have done it
because well, thanks for the you know, education and food
and you know everything else. But I think, you know,
when you're thirteen years old, you want basketball cards all
the time. It's like, all right, we'll go do something
and we'll give you the money, you know. And I
think it was like teaching you about work and being
paid and saving you can you know, eat, you know,

(09:34):
by this much now or that much later or whatever.

Speaker 2 (09:37):
But even that, they didn't have to do that if
they didn't want to