October 27, 2025 • 17 mins
A listener is angry after a bunch of people RSVP'd for her kid's birthday party, but only several showed up. She wants to know if she should call out the parents for not bringing their kids.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
It's Kiki's court, all right, all right, the Honorable Paulina. Wow, Wow,
the Honorable Judge Paulina in for Kiki. Uh, Judge Paulina,
take it away.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Thank you so much. I hit the gavel.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
I guess struck.
Speaker 4 (00:15):
It's been struck helping make you proud girl. Okay, yeah,
so here we go.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Are you guys ready?
Speaker 4 (00:20):
I am so your Kiki. I need your ruling because
I'm about to lose it. I throw my baby's seventh
birthday at a trampoline park. I said invites two months
in advance, confirmed RSVPs, and that was twelve yes is.
I bought matching jump socks, custom cupcakes with every kid's
name on it. The whole Pinterest setup thing. Party day
comes and guess how many kids actually showed up?
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Three? Three kids? The rest hit me with the last minute.
Speaker 4 (00:46):
Something came up text one of their kids was tired
and another one just posted from a whole nother birthday
party at the same time. Oh yeah, double book yeah,
double booked and blessed.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
So to cancel. You can't you can't play post instuff.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Yeah, some people just don't know.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
You can't be saying all I can't make it and
then show up. You don't have to other persons.
Speaker 3 (01:03):
You can't do that.
Speaker 4 (01:04):
Come on now, now I'm standing there with enough pizza
to feed a small village and a birthday boy asking
why his friends didn't come so Geeky or Paulina everybody else?
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Am my petty?
Speaker 4 (01:13):
If I them no or Zell request these parents for
their no show fees, or at least call them out
for their no shows?
Speaker 3 (01:20):
What should I do? Why y'all call them out?
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Like I'm the old Instagram you know, I can find
a way. What thing about me is I'll find.
Speaker 4 (01:26):
A way square and or anything they're saying, like text
them and just be like, hey, that wasn't cool, which
I've seen people do that too before, Like that's very
mass super rude.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
But I don't know what you're gonna do about it.
Speaker 5 (01:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (01:38):
See, this is tough because I feel that when it
comes to kids, like you can't do that to a
child's especially if the kid's excited about their birthday party
and you know everything's you know, the cupcakes and the
Spider Man themes and whatever is going on. You don't
want to disappoint a child, right, So I think the
least you can do is bring your kid, because I
don't think that feel good. If that was your child's
(01:58):
birthday and only three kids showed up out of twelve,
the old me would probably say, yes, call them out,
you know, send all the requests, do it all. But
I think my friends have told me recently that I
am growing, that I'm experiencing growth.
Speaker 1 (02:11):
Wow, And I know this is hard. It's hard not
to go lower than low.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
It's hard. It's really hard for me. You guys understand that.
Speaker 3 (02:19):
Well.
Speaker 6 (02:20):
If you have a relationship with any of the other permes,
I think it's okay to say, hey, you know that
didn't make me feel great, or let's talk about this
or what happened there.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
I think that's fair too.
Speaker 4 (02:29):
But I also think we should put our energy into
the ones that did show up. And if you're going
to be at least a little petty, I would just
post something and say, you know, thanks everyone for coming
a Brandon's birthday party for those who made it. And
I think you should also just truly give thanks and
appreciation of those who do show up, because I do
feel like you're focusing on the ones that came versus
the ones that didn't come.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
So financial commitment too. I mean, I will how very
much it cost it to accommodate twelve kids. It's a
lot of money all the rest of it. So it's
just kind of it's kind of rude, not even I mean, yeah,
it's rude like that your kid's not there, the presence
not or lack thereof. But it's really rude for someone
to plan an event and then But I want to
know why out of twelve kids, like the vast majority
didn't show up. Yeah, it got to me, is sauce, like,
(03:09):
it's probably not the kid. I don't think this is
the parents.
Speaker 3 (03:14):
I don't know. That's weird.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
That's weird to me, like one or two kids dropping
out last minute. I get that kids get sick or
whatever gonna happen, but why did nobody come?
Speaker 4 (03:21):
Right, You're talking about what like eight nine kids not coming?
So I do have a theory that we are in
a epidemic of people not showing up. I don't know
what you'd call that, and I've been guilty of it.
So I want to personally take this moment to hoologize
to my friend Caitlin on my left because I did
this year recently. I was supposed to come to your birthday.
And you had your birthday back in August and you
had an event at your house. You had people over
(03:43):
and I was gonna come, but I never showed up.
And then I hit her with see like, hey, sorry,
I couldn't make a thing, and I know that that
doesn't feel great, especially when you think someone's coming. I
know you didn't plan your party around me, and apologonotic good.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
You brought this up because Kaylen behind the scenes has
been crossed out of the room and it's like she's
been waiting for this moment where you were going to acknowledge.
Speaker 4 (04:04):
I just don't get it, though, Like I don't get
people to do that, and I know what happens and
we've all done it, so I'm not going to play
like I've never you know, if you've done this, so
many weren't coming.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
Like before, say you didn't, but that's all right. The
none everything. She was like, sorry I wasn't there.
Speaker 6 (04:18):
I'm like, well, no, yeah, we saw that, and it's
not right.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
It's not right.
Speaker 4 (04:22):
And I feel like I've had done to me and
I do it to people. And one thing I'm trying
to do is be a villager for other people. I'm
really big on that right now because I want to
show up for people who show up for me. And
I think when it comes to this kid thing, you're right, friend,
one kid getting sick, it's.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
Gonna happen, right, maybe two.
Speaker 4 (04:35):
But I think parents truly just like don't care anymore
now that their argument is like parents are juggling so much.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
Yes, yes we are.
Speaker 4 (04:42):
But I think you can go to Timmy's birthday party
for two hours on a Saturday that you committed to
you by putting it in your calendar to show up
for this child.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Bring your kid, to show your kid what it's like
to show up.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
That's the thing you like if you you agreed to
do it, so you have to show your kid that, hey,
we made a commitment and we're going to see the
commitment through and you know, and then the parent can't
be lazy because I think you're right to some extent.
It's karma when you throw a party for your kid.
You'd be upset if this happened for a lot of
the kid. Maybe. I mean you said the kid pointed out,
(05:12):
like where are my friends? I mean, there were some
kids there and they were they probably had a good time.
I'm sure it was. It probably hurt more for the
parent who has more perspective on what this all means. Hey, Brittany,
Hi Brittany, So this happened to you.
Speaker 5 (05:28):
Oh yeah, so, I mean it happened to me as
the aspect of like kids.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Not showing up.
Speaker 5 (05:32):
But the big thing for me was I hired a
face painter from my daughter's party a couple of years
ago and everything was good. She confirmed the day before
the day of I put down a deposit she was
also a tattoo artist. So ten minutes before the party,
so the kids.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
Can choose, they could choose a face face painting or
a permanent tattoo.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
That's cool. I like the versatility.
Speaker 5 (05:55):
Yeah yeah right, yeah, So ten minutes before the party,
she's had me and said that she ohdeed and was
in the hospital and could not make it. But then
an hour later posted that she was at the Tattoo
Convention in Rosemont tattooing for people to come.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
Hear.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
Wow, you can't lie about it.
Speaker 3 (06:14):
Oh, you don't say stuff. You can't say stuff like that.
Speaker 5 (06:17):
That's what I said. That's what I said. Had she
been truthful and gave me the deposit back, it would
have been fine, but she that's a big thing to lie.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
About, insane And why is that your first go to?
Like that's insane?
Speaker 5 (06:32):
Honestly, Like, girl, you could have said you had diarrhea.
Speaker 3 (06:38):
I mean, yeah, that's a very that's that.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
Not only is that very serious, but it draws sympathy
out of people in a way that you know, that's bad.
Speaker 3 (06:47):
That's that time about car That's the thing.
Speaker 5 (06:49):
Yeah, that's the thing that bothered me the most is
that she was trying to like make me feel bad
for her, and I did it first of course, but
then you go and publicly post it on Facebook where
I have you as a French That's.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
Dumb because you're gonna lie. You know, everyone knows. It
takes a little while to get you know what. I
can't even tell a joke about ODC because I'm not
even going to. I'm not going to. That's that's terrible.
Speaker 3 (07:09):
That is bad.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
You cannot, No, don't lie about tragedy, never because because
you're extracting emotion out of people that you don't deserve.
And that's a bad thing in my opinion.
Speaker 5 (07:21):
Right and now, yeah, so no, and then then I
was stuck with like a whole birthday party full of
kids and my daughter had been asking for a face
painter for years and I was finally so excited that
I had the space and stuff to get it for her.
And yes, it was very disappointing. But also when you
have your birth well your kid's birthday party at places
they charge no show fee, right, thing is is like,
(07:43):
like you said, tell me you can't make it firsthand
because people are s v P. And then you mark
those people and kids down and places like you know,
like fun places or jumping places they do charge no fees.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, thank you for that. Happen, have a
good day. Glad you called. Yeah, no, I'm yeah. I
mean you can't go Venmo. And I think you do
assume some risk when you have to have account, you know,
and you have to assume there's going to be people
that don't come. But I mean as far as more
(08:17):
than half of the people not coming, that's super rude.
But what see Venmo them like, I don't.
Speaker 3 (08:22):
Know, I think it go you look you look kind
of cat. That's that's a bad situation.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
I hate it when you're in the right, but anything
that you do that in order, like I want to
call it retaliation, but anything you do to kind of
stand up for yourself or like take a stand it
ultimately it gives people the opportunity to to to then
further sort of criticize you.
Speaker 3 (08:45):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (08:46):
It's a bad situation to be and when like you,
you know, I'm on the right side of this, like
I would have every right to be, Like I invested
in all these kids coming you guys, all these parents
are s vped, and then none of you showed up,
Like this cost me hundreds of dollars. You should pay
me back for this, for your eaziness or ineptitude or
or whatever your issue is. But then you become the
person in the friend group that build everybody for the party,
(09:08):
even though you have every.
Speaker 3 (09:08):
Right to do it.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
I think you have to ask yourself, like what do
I really Yes, I get my money back, I guess,
but what am I really gaining.
Speaker 6 (09:14):
It's very easy to communicate, Like that's all you have
to do if something came up, communicate if you can't go, communicate.
Speaker 3 (09:21):
Yeah, I think it's pretty simple.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Hey Ashley, Hi, Hi, So just to recap here, if
you're just tuning in Pauline and for Kiki and Kiki's Court.
But essentially, a woman planned a birthday party for her
kid and like ten of the thirteen kids didn't show
up after rvvping that they would, And this woman's like,
I want to call them all out, I want to
send them a bill, I want to do this and that.
Speaker 3 (09:39):
What do you do?
Speaker 7 (09:41):
So I recently went to a party a whole I
think the whole class was invited.
Speaker 8 (09:45):
It was about twenty.
Speaker 7 (09:46):
Kids, and only my child showed up. Oh, she said
that a handful did RSVP, they did not come. The
other handful just didn't say anything at all. But I've
also worked a classrooms where you have to.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
Invite the whole class.
Speaker 8 (10:02):
So the parents send the invitations. We put these in
their folders.
Speaker 7 (10:06):
There are so many parents that don't open their child's folder,
so these invitations are sitting and sitting and just not opened.
Speaker 8 (10:14):
So there's a you know, a huge percentage of kids
that the parents don't even know there's a party because
we don't tell the kids we're putting invitations in there,
because that also.
Speaker 7 (10:25):
Causes you know, chaos, okay, especially in smaller kids. So
there's you know, the invitation is not even getting opened
by so many people. But yeah, it is. It's sucky
when you know. I felt so bad for the kid.
Thankfully it was at their house and he didn't really notice.
He's four or five and he was turning five, and
you know, they had fun anyway. But being one out
(10:47):
of twenties.
Speaker 1 (10:48):
I guess they knew mad. Yeah I would too. Yeah,
no one knew, that's one thing. But if everybody said
we're coming and then all these people did, that's messed up.
Speaker 3 (10:58):
And I think that's pure.
Speaker 8 (11:01):
You know, as a parent, you don't want.
Speaker 7 (11:03):
Yes, it's like, oh I have to go sit at
this party for this little kid, but.
Speaker 3 (11:07):
For two hours exactly.
Speaker 8 (11:08):
It's not that much of your day.
Speaker 1 (11:09):
Yeah, I think of the impact it's having on the kid,
on the parents and everybody else too. Ashley, thank you,
no problem, have a good day now. Hadley is our
eleven year old contributor. Hadley calls every now and again. Now, Hadley, well,
what are your thoughts on this? Because we come to
you really when it comes to sort of how to
how to live our lives, and I want to know
what you Hadley, our eleven year old contributor, has to
(11:31):
say about this.
Speaker 6 (11:34):
I have to.
Speaker 9 (11:35):
Say that she shouldn't be petty because she'd be focusing
around like the kids that actually showed up. Yeah, because
if like she just circles around the people that didn't
show up, then what's the kid going to have fun
at the birthday party?
Speaker 3 (11:54):
I think not Hadley.
Speaker 1 (11:55):
If we wanted to do something, though, like, if we
wanted to get back at people, how would we do it?
Do you think if we were so inclined? Now we're not,
because you're you're a much better person than that. But
if you wanted to, what would you do?
Speaker 9 (12:10):
I'd maybe, like, if I didn't have the parents' phone number,
maybe go off like TikTok or Facebook message them and
be like, hey, so what was the big thing that
came up that you couldn't come to the party?
Speaker 3 (12:24):
Right?
Speaker 1 (12:25):
And then you could go like maybe look at all
their social media and see what they did instead and
be like, well, it's funny because I actually observed that
you went to something else instead and you lied to me,
And now I'm gonna I'm going to extort you. I
don't know. You would never do that badly, You wouldn't
thank you for calling. I appreciate you. Very well spoken.
She's better spoken than I am. And she's eleven years old,
(12:48):
so I'll just go ahead and step aside. Let her
take over the program. Hey, Tony, Tony, just happened with
your son's communion? You invited a bunch of kids and
then a bunch of kids backed at the last minute.
Speaker 3 (12:59):
Is that what happened?
Speaker 7 (13:00):
Right?
Speaker 10 (13:00):
It was family. It wasn't all children. That's even worse
ad all ten children.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
Yeah, what did you do about it?
Speaker 10 (13:06):
But you know, and honestly, I didn't do anything. I
just felt bad for my son and we tried to
make the best of the day. But like I said,
I ordered food for one hundred people because eighty six responded,
and you know, about fourteen people showed up, So we
just had Chinese food for months. I threw it in
the freezer, and you know, just tried to make the
best of the base.
Speaker 3 (13:26):
Just messed up.
Speaker 1 (13:27):
I mean, you're planning on one hundred people and of
those eighties, some told you they were coming, So I
mean that is no small undertaking, Like you got to
have enough stuff for eighty some people. Why do you
think what was the mass exodus about? Like why did
so many people say they were coming and then that
show up?
Speaker 3 (13:43):
Do you think.
Speaker 10 (13:45):
Honestly, I think we planned it too far in advance,
and then you know, coming up to the date, people's
lives they just get busy.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 10 (13:52):
I mean, like, you know, I'm assuming my family wouldn't
do that to me on purpose, but you know, honestly,
I never looked at my family the same way. Again, Yeah,
like other events, you know, I would plan for let's say,
you know, they responded with fifty five them, like realistically,
let's say thirty we'll show up.
Speaker 3 (14:11):
Yeah, that's that's bad.
Speaker 1 (14:13):
Yeah, I'm sorry, Tony, Thanks for calling, man, thanks for listening.
Speaker 3 (14:15):
Have a good day at a problem as well. So
Kelly's got a theory too. Hi Kelly, welcome, Good morning guys.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
How are you hi?
Speaker 1 (14:23):
Good morning? So what's your theory on this? The final say?
Speaker 11 (14:27):
So, I think this is across the board. I think
the social media and everything else, everyone has constant somo.
So we commit to everything right, we want to do
all the things, and we want to go to all
the parties when we're humans, and so when it gets
to that day, we're burnt out, or we're sick, our
our kids are cranky, and I think people really just
need to take a deep look inside themselves before you commit,
(14:50):
and really prioritize, Like what are the things that are important?
Speaker 1 (14:54):
Yeah, I think you're right. I think there are. And
I have no problem with this personally. But a lot
of people have an issue saying no. They can't me
no issue whatsoever. I'll tell you no, and that's good
and I know right away, and but be you right.
People don't want to say no. They say yes and
they think that that's a nice thing, even though they
have no intention of going, or they forget and then
(15:15):
they don't go, or they already are coming up with
an excuse, and you wind up probably hurting someone more
that way than you would if you just said, hey,
I can't do it one.
Speaker 11 (15:22):
Hundred percent, Like just be upfront and it's okay. Like
I don't even do big parties for my kids anymore,
just because it's not worth it. I'll have like two
or three friends, you know what I mean, and like
from the get go, that's just all we do because
I get it.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
People are busy now.
Speaker 5 (15:37):
Everyone can spend.
Speaker 11 (15:38):
You know, you get invited when kids are small, especially
you'll get two, three, four or five six birthday party
invitations a month, you know, and then you're trying to
do the soccer games and you're trying to do.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
You know, this whole pro family stuff. There's enough hours
to do all of the things.
Speaker 3 (15:53):
Yeah, Kelly, thank.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
You, Thank you guys so much. Have a great day.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
You'd do.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
Another thing you can do is as annoying as it
is is you could the whole thing on one of
those websites, you know, you know, evite or whatever, because
not only then and then if it's a kid's party
or something, then make it, make the make the invitation
public or the at least the invitees, like for the
people who are s vpdes, they can see who else
is there, and then it's almost like there's an accountability.
And then it also sends out like little annoying reminders
(16:20):
like hey, the party is tomorrow or whatever.
Speaker 3 (16:22):
Because of those Yeah, because in advance, you it's.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
Easy to say like, hey, in two months, we're doing
this thing, and then people will forget if you don't
say one more word about it.
Speaker 6 (16:31):
And I cannot, I cannot do this any longer. I
need to say this. We cannot send a picture of
an invite in a text message.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
That is not a way a good way for me.
To remember your party.
Speaker 6 (16:42):
Use those online things so I can say add to calendar,
because if you send me a picture in text, I'm
gonna save it and then lose it and not know
how the party is.
Speaker 2 (16:50):
We must stop this.
Speaker 1 (16:51):
Tell you said that to me actually, and I didn't
go to the party, and they were like, you didn't
go to the party.
Speaker 3 (16:55):
I'm like, but you didn't invite me. And then then
it showed me.
Speaker 1 (16:58):
Deep in the middle of a bunch of texts about
something else, they popped in some picture about a Halloween
pop like what I can't do I didn't even see
what that was. Like, I was, We're talking about something
totally different. You can't just spring that on me and
then be like, where were you. I tried to guilt
them a little bit for not inviting me, you know,
and then it turned out I was invited, but it.
Speaker 3 (17:18):
Was the thing.
Speaker 1 (17:19):
It was a picture of an IM what's doing? No,
that's that's unacceptable.
It's Kiki's court, all right, all right, the Honorable Paulina. Wow, Wow,
the Honorable Judge Paulina in for Kiki. Uh, Judge Paulina,
take it away.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
Thank you so much. I hit the gavel.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
I guess struck.
Speaker 4 (00:15):
It's been struck helping make you proud girl. Okay, yeah,
so here we go.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Are you guys ready?
Speaker 4 (00:20):
I am so your Kiki. I need your ruling because
I'm about to lose it. I throw my baby's seventh
birthday at a trampoline park. I said invites two months
in advance, confirmed RSVPs, and that was twelve yes is.
I bought matching jump socks, custom cupcakes with every kid's
name on it. The whole Pinterest setup thing. Party day
comes and guess how many kids actually showed up?
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Three? Three kids? The rest hit me with the last minute.
Speaker 4 (00:46):
Something came up text one of their kids was tired
and another one just posted from a whole nother birthday
party at the same time. Oh yeah, double book yeah,
double booked and blessed.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
So to cancel. You can't you can't play post instuff.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Yeah, some people just don't know.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
You can't be saying all I can't make it and
then show up. You don't have to other persons.
Speaker 3 (01:03):
You can't do that.
Speaker 4 (01:04):
Come on now, now I'm standing there with enough pizza
to feed a small village and a birthday boy asking
why his friends didn't come so Geeky or Paulina everybody else?
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Am my petty?
Speaker 4 (01:13):
If I them no or Zell request these parents for
their no show fees, or at least call them out
for their no shows?
Speaker 3 (01:20):
What should I do? Why y'all call them out?
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Like I'm the old Instagram you know, I can find
a way. What thing about me is I'll find.
Speaker 4 (01:26):
A way square and or anything they're saying, like text
them and just be like, hey, that wasn't cool, which
I've seen people do that too before, Like that's very
mass super rude.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
But I don't know what you're gonna do about it.
Speaker 5 (01:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (01:38):
See, this is tough because I feel that when it
comes to kids, like you can't do that to a
child's especially if the kid's excited about their birthday party
and you know everything's you know, the cupcakes and the
Spider Man themes and whatever is going on. You don't
want to disappoint a child, right, So I think the
least you can do is bring your kid, because I
don't think that feel good. If that was your child's
(01:58):
birthday and only three kids showed up out of twelve,
the old me would probably say, yes, call them out,
you know, send all the requests, do it all. But
I think my friends have told me recently that I
am growing, that I'm experiencing growth.
Speaker 1 (02:11):
Wow, And I know this is hard. It's hard not
to go lower than low.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
It's hard. It's really hard for me. You guys understand that.
Speaker 3 (02:19):
Well.
Speaker 6 (02:20):
If you have a relationship with any of the other permes,
I think it's okay to say, hey, you know that
didn't make me feel great, or let's talk about this
or what happened there.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
I think that's fair too.
Speaker 4 (02:29):
But I also think we should put our energy into
the ones that did show up. And if you're going
to be at least a little petty, I would just
post something and say, you know, thanks everyone for coming
a Brandon's birthday party for those who made it. And
I think you should also just truly give thanks and
appreciation of those who do show up, because I do
feel like you're focusing on the ones that came versus
the ones that didn't come.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
So financial commitment too. I mean, I will how very
much it cost it to accommodate twelve kids. It's a
lot of money all the rest of it. So it's
just kind of it's kind of rude, not even I mean, yeah,
it's rude like that your kid's not there, the presence
not or lack thereof. But it's really rude for someone
to plan an event and then But I want to
know why out of twelve kids, like the vast majority
didn't show up. Yeah, it got to me, is sauce, like,
(03:09):
it's probably not the kid. I don't think this is
the parents.
Speaker 3 (03:14):
I don't know. That's weird.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
That's weird to me, like one or two kids dropping
out last minute. I get that kids get sick or
whatever gonna happen, but why did nobody come?
Speaker 4 (03:21):
Right, You're talking about what like eight nine kids not coming?
So I do have a theory that we are in
a epidemic of people not showing up. I don't know
what you'd call that, and I've been guilty of it.
So I want to personally take this moment to hoologize
to my friend Caitlin on my left because I did
this year recently. I was supposed to come to your birthday.
And you had your birthday back in August and you
had an event at your house. You had people over
(03:43):
and I was gonna come, but I never showed up.
And then I hit her with see like, hey, sorry,
I couldn't make a thing, and I know that that
doesn't feel great, especially when you think someone's coming. I
know you didn't plan your party around me, and apologonotic good.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
You brought this up because Kaylen behind the scenes has
been crossed out of the room and it's like she's
been waiting for this moment where you were going to acknowledge.
Speaker 4 (04:04):
I just don't get it, though, Like I don't get
people to do that, and I know what happens and
we've all done it, so I'm not going to play
like I've never you know, if you've done this, so
many weren't coming.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
Like before, say you didn't, but that's all right. The
none everything. She was like, sorry I wasn't there.
Speaker 6 (04:18):
I'm like, well, no, yeah, we saw that, and it's
not right.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
It's not right.
Speaker 4 (04:22):
And I feel like I've had done to me and
I do it to people. And one thing I'm trying
to do is be a villager for other people. I'm
really big on that right now because I want to
show up for people who show up for me. And
I think when it comes to this kid thing, you're right, friend,
one kid getting sick, it's.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
Gonna happen, right, maybe two.
Speaker 4 (04:35):
But I think parents truly just like don't care anymore
now that their argument is like parents are juggling so much.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
Yes, yes we are.
Speaker 4 (04:42):
But I think you can go to Timmy's birthday party
for two hours on a Saturday that you committed to
you by putting it in your calendar to show up
for this child.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Bring your kid, to show your kid what it's like
to show up.
Speaker 1 (04:51):
That's the thing you like if you you agreed to
do it, so you have to show your kid that, hey,
we made a commitment and we're going to see the
commitment through and you know, and then the parent can't
be lazy because I think you're right to some extent.
It's karma when you throw a party for your kid.
You'd be upset if this happened for a lot of
the kid. Maybe. I mean you said the kid pointed out,
(05:12):
like where are my friends? I mean, there were some
kids there and they were they probably had a good time.
I'm sure it was. It probably hurt more for the
parent who has more perspective on what this all means. Hey, Brittany,
Hi Brittany, So this happened to you.
Speaker 5 (05:28):
Oh yeah, so, I mean it happened to me as
the aspect of like kids.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Not showing up.
Speaker 5 (05:32):
But the big thing for me was I hired a
face painter from my daughter's party a couple of years
ago and everything was good. She confirmed the day before
the day of I put down a deposit she was
also a tattoo artist. So ten minutes before the party,
so the kids.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
Can choose, they could choose a face face painting or
a permanent tattoo.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
That's cool. I like the versatility.
Speaker 5 (05:55):
Yeah yeah right, yeah, So ten minutes before the party,
she's had me and said that she ohdeed and was
in the hospital and could not make it. But then
an hour later posted that she was at the Tattoo
Convention in Rosemont tattooing for people to come.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
Hear.
Speaker 2 (06:12):
Wow, you can't lie about it.
Speaker 3 (06:14):
Oh, you don't say stuff. You can't say stuff like that.
Speaker 5 (06:17):
That's what I said. That's what I said. Had she
been truthful and gave me the deposit back, it would
have been fine, but she that's a big thing to lie.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
About, insane And why is that your first go to?
Like that's insane?
Speaker 5 (06:32):
Honestly, Like, girl, you could have said you had diarrhea.
Speaker 3 (06:38):
I mean, yeah, that's a very that's that.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
Not only is that very serious, but it draws sympathy
out of people in a way that you know, that's bad.
Speaker 3 (06:47):
That's that time about car That's the thing.
Speaker 5 (06:49):
Yeah, that's the thing that bothered me the most is
that she was trying to like make me feel bad
for her, and I did it first of course, but
then you go and publicly post it on Facebook where
I have you as a French That's.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
Dumb because you're gonna lie. You know, everyone knows. It
takes a little while to get you know what. I
can't even tell a joke about ODC because I'm not
even going to. I'm not going to. That's that's terrible.
Speaker 3 (07:09):
That is bad.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
You cannot, No, don't lie about tragedy, never because because
you're extracting emotion out of people that you don't deserve.
And that's a bad thing in my opinion.
Speaker 5 (07:21):
Right and now, yeah, so no, and then then I
was stuck with like a whole birthday party full of
kids and my daughter had been asking for a face
painter for years and I was finally so excited that
I had the space and stuff to get it for her.
And yes, it was very disappointing. But also when you
have your birth well your kid's birthday party at places
they charge no show fee, right, thing is is like,
(07:43):
like you said, tell me you can't make it firsthand
because people are s v P. And then you mark
those people and kids down and places like you know,
like fun places or jumping places they do charge no fees.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, thank you for that. Happen, have a
good day. Glad you called. Yeah, no, I'm yeah. I
mean you can't go Venmo. And I think you do
assume some risk when you have to have account, you know,
and you have to assume there's going to be people
that don't come. But I mean as far as more
(08:17):
than half of the people not coming, that's super rude.
But what see Venmo them like, I don't.
Speaker 3 (08:22):
Know, I think it go you look you look kind
of cat. That's that's a bad situation.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
I hate it when you're in the right, but anything
that you do that in order, like I want to
call it retaliation, but anything you do to kind of
stand up for yourself or like take a stand it
ultimately it gives people the opportunity to to to then
further sort of criticize you.
Speaker 3 (08:45):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (08:46):
It's a bad situation to be and when like you,
you know, I'm on the right side of this, like
I would have every right to be, Like I invested
in all these kids coming you guys, all these parents
are s vped, and then none of you showed up,
Like this cost me hundreds of dollars. You should pay
me back for this, for your eaziness or ineptitude or
or whatever your issue is. But then you become the
person in the friend group that build everybody for the party,
(09:08):
even though you have every.
Speaker 3 (09:08):
Right to do it.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
I think you have to ask yourself, like what do
I really Yes, I get my money back, I guess,
but what am I really gaining.
Speaker 6 (09:14):
It's very easy to communicate, Like that's all you have
to do if something came up, communicate if you can't go, communicate.
Speaker 3 (09:21):
Yeah, I think it's pretty simple.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Hey Ashley, Hi, Hi, So just to recap here, if
you're just tuning in Pauline and for Kiki and Kiki's Court.
But essentially, a woman planned a birthday party for her
kid and like ten of the thirteen kids didn't show
up after rvvping that they would, And this woman's like,
I want to call them all out, I want to
send them a bill, I want to do this and that.
Speaker 3 (09:39):
What do you do?
Speaker 7 (09:41):
So I recently went to a party a whole I
think the whole class was invited.
Speaker 8 (09:45):
It was about twenty.
Speaker 7 (09:46):
Kids, and only my child showed up. Oh, she said
that a handful did RSVP, they did not come. The
other handful just didn't say anything at all. But I've
also worked a classrooms where you have to.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
Invite the whole class.
Speaker 8 (10:02):
So the parents send the invitations. We put these in
their folders.
Speaker 7 (10:06):
There are so many parents that don't open their child's folder,
so these invitations are sitting and sitting and just not opened.
Speaker 8 (10:14):
So there's a you know, a huge percentage of kids
that the parents don't even know there's a party because
we don't tell the kids we're putting invitations in there,
because that also.
Speaker 7 (10:25):
Causes you know, chaos, okay, especially in smaller kids. So
there's you know, the invitation is not even getting opened
by so many people. But yeah, it is. It's sucky
when you know. I felt so bad for the kid.
Thankfully it was at their house and he didn't really notice.
He's four or five and he was turning five, and
you know, they had fun anyway. But being one out
(10:47):
of twenties.
Speaker 1 (10:48):
I guess they knew mad. Yeah I would too. Yeah,
no one knew, that's one thing. But if everybody said
we're coming and then all these people did, that's messed up.
Speaker 3 (10:58):
And I think that's pure.
Speaker 8 (11:01):
You know, as a parent, you don't want.
Speaker 7 (11:03):
Yes, it's like, oh I have to go sit at
this party for this little kid, but.
Speaker 3 (11:07):
For two hours exactly.
Speaker 8 (11:08):
It's not that much of your day.
Speaker 1 (11:09):
Yeah, I think of the impact it's having on the kid,
on the parents and everybody else too. Ashley, thank you,
no problem, have a good day now. Hadley is our
eleven year old contributor. Hadley calls every now and again. Now, Hadley, well,
what are your thoughts on this? Because we come to
you really when it comes to sort of how to
how to live our lives, and I want to know
what you Hadley, our eleven year old contributor, has to
(11:31):
say about this.
Speaker 6 (11:34):
I have to.
Speaker 9 (11:35):
Say that she shouldn't be petty because she'd be focusing
around like the kids that actually showed up. Yeah, because
if like she just circles around the people that didn't
show up, then what's the kid going to have fun
at the birthday party?
Speaker 3 (11:54):
I think not Hadley.
Speaker 1 (11:55):
If we wanted to do something, though, like, if we
wanted to get back at people, how would we do it?
Do you think if we were so inclined? Now we're not,
because you're you're a much better person than that. But
if you wanted to, what would you do?
Speaker 9 (12:10):
I'd maybe, like, if I didn't have the parents' phone number,
maybe go off like TikTok or Facebook message them and
be like, hey, so what was the big thing that
came up that you couldn't come to the party?
Speaker 3 (12:24):
Right?
Speaker 1 (12:25):
And then you could go like maybe look at all
their social media and see what they did instead and
be like, well, it's funny because I actually observed that
you went to something else instead and you lied to me,
And now I'm gonna I'm going to extort you. I
don't know. You would never do that badly, You wouldn't
thank you for calling. I appreciate you. Very well spoken.
She's better spoken than I am. And she's eleven years old,
(12:48):
so I'll just go ahead and step aside. Let her
take over the program. Hey, Tony, Tony, just happened with
your son's communion? You invited a bunch of kids and
then a bunch of kids backed at the last minute.
Speaker 3 (12:59):
Is that what happened?
Speaker 7 (13:00):
Right?
Speaker 10 (13:00):
It was family. It wasn't all children. That's even worse
ad all ten children.
Speaker 3 (13:05):
Yeah, what did you do about it?
Speaker 10 (13:06):
But you know, and honestly, I didn't do anything. I
just felt bad for my son and we tried to
make the best of the day. But like I said,
I ordered food for one hundred people because eighty six responded,
and you know, about fourteen people showed up, So we
just had Chinese food for months. I threw it in
the freezer, and you know, just tried to make the
best of the base.
Speaker 3 (13:26):
Just messed up.
Speaker 1 (13:27):
I mean, you're planning on one hundred people and of
those eighties, some told you they were coming, So I
mean that is no small undertaking, Like you got to
have enough stuff for eighty some people. Why do you
think what was the mass exodus about? Like why did
so many people say they were coming and then that
show up?
Speaker 3 (13:43):
Do you think.
Speaker 10 (13:45):
Honestly, I think we planned it too far in advance,
and then you know, coming up to the date, people's
lives they just get busy.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
Yeah.
Speaker 10 (13:52):
I mean, like, you know, I'm assuming my family wouldn't
do that to me on purpose, but you know, honestly,
I never looked at my family the same way. Again, Yeah,
like other events, you know, I would plan for let's say,
you know, they responded with fifty five them, like realistically,
let's say thirty we'll show up.
Speaker 3 (14:11):
Yeah, that's that's bad.
Speaker 1 (14:13):
Yeah, I'm sorry, Tony, Thanks for calling, man, thanks for listening.
Speaker 3 (14:15):
Have a good day at a problem as well. So
Kelly's got a theory too. Hi Kelly, welcome, Good morning guys.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
How are you hi?
Speaker 1 (14:23):
Good morning? So what's your theory on this? The final say?
Speaker 11 (14:27):
So, I think this is across the board. I think
the social media and everything else, everyone has constant somo.
So we commit to everything right, we want to do
all the things, and we want to go to all
the parties when we're humans, and so when it gets
to that day, we're burnt out, or we're sick, our
our kids are cranky, and I think people really just
need to take a deep look inside themselves before you commit,
(14:50):
and really prioritize, Like what are the things that are important?
Speaker 1 (14:54):
Yeah, I think you're right. I think there are. And
I have no problem with this personally. But a lot
of people have an issue saying no. They can't me
no issue whatsoever. I'll tell you no, and that's good
and I know right away, and but be you right.
People don't want to say no. They say yes and
they think that that's a nice thing, even though they
have no intention of going, or they forget and then
(15:15):
they don't go, or they already are coming up with
an excuse, and you wind up probably hurting someone more
that way than you would if you just said, hey,
I can't do it one.
Speaker 11 (15:22):
Hundred percent, Like just be upfront and it's okay. Like
I don't even do big parties for my kids anymore,
just because it's not worth it. I'll have like two
or three friends, you know what I mean, and like
from the get go, that's just all we do because
I get it.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
People are busy now.
Speaker 5 (15:37):
Everyone can spend.
Speaker 11 (15:38):
You know, you get invited when kids are small, especially
you'll get two, three, four or five six birthday party
invitations a month, you know, and then you're trying to
do the soccer games and you're trying to do.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
You know, this whole pro family stuff. There's enough hours
to do all of the things.
Speaker 3 (15:53):
Yeah, Kelly, thank.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
You, Thank you guys so much. Have a great day.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
You'd do.
Speaker 1 (15:57):
Another thing you can do is as annoying as it
is is you could the whole thing on one of
those websites, you know, you know, evite or whatever, because
not only then and then if it's a kid's party
or something, then make it, make the make the invitation
public or the at least the invitees, like for the
people who are s vpdes, they can see who else
is there, and then it's almost like there's an accountability.
And then it also sends out like little annoying reminders
(16:20):
like hey, the party is tomorrow or whatever.
Speaker 3 (16:22):
Because of those Yeah, because in advance, you it's.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
Easy to say like, hey, in two months, we're doing
this thing, and then people will forget if you don't
say one more word about it.
Speaker 6 (16:31):
And I cannot, I cannot do this any longer. I
need to say this. We cannot send a picture of
an invite in a text message.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
That is not a way a good way for me.
To remember your party.
Speaker 6 (16:42):
Use those online things so I can say add to calendar,
because if you send me a picture in text, I'm
gonna save it and then lose it and not know
how the party is.
Speaker 2 (16:50):
We must stop this.
Speaker 1 (16:51):
Tell you said that to me actually, and I didn't
go to the party, and they were like, you didn't
go to the party.
Speaker 3 (16:55):
I'm like, but you didn't invite me. And then then
it showed me.
Speaker 1 (16:58):
Deep in the middle of a bunch of texts about
something else, they popped in some picture about a Halloween
pop like what I can't do I didn't even see
what that was. Like, I was, We're talking about something
totally different. You can't just spring that on me and
then be like, where were you. I tried to guilt
them a little bit for not inviting me, you know,
and then it turned out I was invited, but it.
Speaker 3 (17:18):
Was the thing.
Speaker 1 (17:19):
It was a picture of an IM what's doing? No,
that's that's unacceptable.
The Fred Show On Demand News
Show Links
Official WebsitePopular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.
The Breakfast Club
The World's Most Dangerous Morning Show, The Breakfast Club, With DJ Envy, Jess Hilarious, And Charlamagne Tha God!