Radio Blogs: Ashland's Married

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Tuck better than they said. These are the radio blogs

(00:04):
on the Fred Show, like we're writing in our diaries,
except we say him aloud. We call them blogs. Nick
Caitlin brought something to our attention, Rufio that you've just
failed to mention. I mean, yeah, something in your life
that you just failed to mention. And it's upsetting. All right,
Well it was upsetting to me too, I would imagine.

Speaker 2 (00:20):
Yeah, dear blogs, So about a month ago, I don't
know how to tell you all this. I'm sorry you
weren't invited. But Ashland is now married.

Speaker 1 (00:31):
Wow, your four year old vocal four and a half,
four and a half, he's a married man. Yeah it happened,
but he was.

Speaker 2 (00:39):
He's out of school now. But it would happen in
school at the playground during their little recess session. I
was picking them up from school that day and his
teacher's like, oh, just let you know Ashland is married now.

Speaker 1 (00:52):
I said, excuse me why? Wow.

Speaker 2 (00:54):
Apparently they had a wedding ceremony in the They asked
the teacher to help them get married. Him and his
friend Harley his wife.

Speaker 1 (01:01):
Oh yes, yeah, your daughter in law.

Speaker 2 (01:04):
Yeah, didn't have a cake too.

Speaker 1 (01:07):
The wedding cakes.

Speaker 2 (01:09):
Yeah, they had all the friends attend the wedding. All
the classmates attend this wedding. Wow, I asked him. I
was like, did you you know did you kiss your bride?
And he's like, I kissed her on the hand. I
was like, I know, I got this little player man.
I'm I'm so scre Yeah. So him and Harley are
like best school friends, like they would when it started

(01:30):
getting nice out after I actually learned how to ride
a bike because she was She's the same age, but
she already knew how to ride a bike. So when
he started learning how to ride a bike, he would
ask me to bring his bike to school to pick
him up, and they would ride home to either our
house or her house. We don't live too far from
each other, but so we would. They would spend every
day after school riding the bikes together. And then towards

(01:50):
the end of the school year, he just came out.
It's like hey, I was like, what, You're married?

Speaker 1 (01:55):
Wow. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:56):
So they had a ceremony. All their friends were there
in attendance. Obviously the classmates. They're excited. Yeah, they wanted
a cake, but they didn't get a cake.

Speaker 1 (02:05):
No, Well, he was able to He's a player from
the Himalayas, right, he was able to get this woman
to commit without a ring even.

Speaker 2 (02:11):
Yeah, man of god, I know, I'm so proud.

Speaker 1 (02:15):
You need to call it big tim.

Speaker 2 (02:21):
Oh yeah, So, like I said, I apologize, I wasn't
even invited to this wedding.

Speaker 1 (02:26):
Is awful.

Speaker 2 (02:26):
But he is married. I don't know. Tomorrow we're supposed
to hang out with his other girlfriend Donatella.

Speaker 1 (02:33):
Yeah. This guy's polyamorous, right, so I don't know how
she's gonna take it. But he is a married man
ethical nominogamy. Has he discussed this with her an open
relationship or is he? Is he just out here? You know,
I don't know. I don't know what he talks about. Wow, yeah,
this guy.

Speaker 2 (02:49):
So yeah, he's like, yeah, that dimples is getting everybody.

Speaker 1 (02:54):
I have terrible news for your There was a bachelor party.
It was that Chuck E Cheese. I hope Todd. He
got absolutely wild, right, I've never seen the Chucky Cheese
mouseman get that crazy.

Speaker 2 (03:06):
But Fred left when he said, oh, I gotta go
to the bathroom wipe my butt, and it's like, I'm
on it.

Speaker 1 (03:12):
I had to get going. I paid, though in typical fashion,
he didn't have any money with him, just like his dad. Yeah, exactly,