Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
I just Taylor needs to ends, not as a human.
Taylor needs to come perform, make everybody happy for three nights,
and then get the hell out of here and it's over.
I think the whole tour needs to end, actually, because
I think people are going to start getting the impression
that somehow we can get them tickets in other cities too,
So the whole thing just needs to come and go
and everyone needs to be happy. Hit the tangent intro thing.
(00:22):
Let's go, Rufio. It's the tangent with the bread show,
giving you all the we couldn't talk about on air. Yeah,
I'm tired of it. I'm tired of it and I
don't even know if people are messing with me now.
But more and more texts, Hey where are my tailor tickets? Hey?
Can I get Taylor tickets? Even Mama Marta yesterday texted
you and said, hey, can I get two Taylor Swift tickets?
(00:43):
Where are you? Where are you living? Marta?
Speaker 2 (00:46):
Marta Taylor is.
Speaker 3 (00:47):
I was going to ask were they for her? Because
I would think about it. Maybe for Marta, but I no, no,
she knows the Taylor Swift song.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
No, not for her.
Speaker 4 (00:56):
That'd be something though it's like Marta, I know, come
on to the show, mom, and it shows there is nothing.
Speaker 1 (01:03):
Nothing announces that your mom is not supporting us. Then
her asking for the hardest ticket in the world, my
hustle to get. I just needed to come and go.
I do needed to come and go.
Speaker 5 (01:14):
But can I go after Detroit because I think Jason
and I are going to go try to hit this
next weekend after.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
The d I said the whole two I just everyone
just as planned, Everything goes, everyone be happy, everyone enjoyed themselves.
I just I can't help you, and so none of
us can. So sorry.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
And you didn't believe in us that we could see
multiple shows. So if we if we go to multiple shows.
Speaker 1 (01:35):
Okay, I think you guys got three cities in you guys.
I think you were well, no, no, no. What I was
giving you a hard time about is that you were
you were. You both were so flippantly before the ticket
Master debacle, going oh, I'm going to go.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
Because it's always been that we're going to hit up Foxborough.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
We're not Troy. We'll pull through, uh, you know, swing
through and sold your field, go to l A or
good Arizona. Probably we'll probably hit up the d I
don't know. We'll probably get through your.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
Yes, it is because that's how it was.
Speaker 3 (02:06):
I'm sorry, I have dreams, you guys to.
Speaker 5 (02:13):
People that don't even like her are going and that's
the literal reason.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
Cloue.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
Yeah, everybody wants Cloud, everybody wants to pick there.
Speaker 1 (02:20):
But where were y'all boy during love where someone just
left the fuse? Where are y'all y'all?
Speaker 3 (02:26):
You need to call him down because I had to.
Speaker 5 (02:29):
We had to ride for that Cardivans.
Speaker 1 (02:32):
Yeah, look at that. Push it. All you got to
do is push. I got a new button over here.
It's the Caylin Jason button. I pushed that. Watch them
just explode and then I leave the room for twenty minutes. Yeah,
but you you were saying off the air, you know,
you were asking me, Caitlin, what the sort of application
process is going to be if I'm giving a plus one?
First of all, for the record, I don't even know
(02:55):
that I was asked. If I was, It was the
text why You're going to Taylor Swift from somebody at
the record label. I said, okay, sure, I mean that's
very nice. I would like to I would like to
go I like Taylor Swift. I'd like to go. But
what I'm un clear on is what that means, Like
do I get to take someone with me? Do I not?
But if I do, this is gonna be tricky, Okay.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Can I can?
Speaker 5 (03:20):
Jason and I have like clipboards and have some sort
of like casting.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
I need a pro cons list for you to bring
everybody in here and they can audition like it's a
movie or something shot.
Speaker 3 (03:31):
I need. I need to know like their top favorite
not single song, what.
Speaker 2 (03:37):
Would they wear to the show? Very important? Would they
leave early? Very important?
Speaker 6 (03:42):
Right?
Speaker 3 (03:42):
Exactly.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
It's amazing some of the people who, like one person
reached out to me who I went on one date with
like a year ago, and she ship all over radio
and the person's kind of in the business and was like, oh,
I don't radio this, radio that, and and the person
also on the date was telling me how connected she was.
(04:03):
And yet somehow I am the last person on earth
that can get her tickets and I work on the radio. WHOA, OK, No,
I'm you said too much?
Speaker 2 (04:15):
You said too much, way too much? Does she know who?
How you paid for that dinner?
Speaker 1 (04:20):
Of course, It's just that's the number of people that
ship on the business. And then it's like, oh, but
you don't see the mind, you know, asking me for
tickets and the most difficult thing to access, want to
why because we can get in? Can we work at
the radio?
Speaker 2 (04:32):
So do you have anyone in mind?
Speaker 5 (04:33):
Because I mean you had literally you have the power
to make someone's life.
Speaker 1 (04:37):
I don't want that power. I don't want that power.
And I don't know what to do. I really don't.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
With great gifts come great responsibility.
Speaker 7 (04:45):
If you take any don't take any kind of date.
Take someone that's like deserving that wants to go to
this concert. No, like I feel like Fred should like
pay forward to like you know, like I don't know,
like someone in the hospital, or someone in the exist
or someone doing that.
Speaker 2 (04:59):
You know what I'm saying, Yeah, have a nice date night.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
Yeah I don't. I don't. I mean I think that's
a very nice idea. I don't know how possible it is.
And to be honest with you, if it were up
to me, and it's not, if it were up to
because I'm someone's guest, I would just give them. I
would give whatever access I have to someone who really
want I mean, because I want to go, but I don't.
It's not. My life doesn't depend on it. But some
of the stories that we're getting, it's like I wish
(05:24):
we could help, but we can't. Guys, Like, it's it
I know, I I oh, man, some of the stuff
I'm reading, it's like it's just oh, it's heartbreaking. But
I'm like, yeah, please don't. At the end of the
email say oh, but but Taylor Swift would solve all
my problems, It's like, well, it won't, and I don't
have I can't. We can't do it.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
We literally cannot.
Speaker 4 (05:45):
We got a message in our YEAH and our DMS
the other day too, and it makes me really sad.
I'm telling you guys, like, it just makes me sad
to read those stories and.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
We wish we could so hard. It's true.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
We do like we don't have any connections.
Speaker 5 (05:56):
Jason, I are literally driving to Detroit and we're gonna
like try to scalp ticket outside of the arena, Like
we have a zero connection.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
It's like it's embarrassing.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
If not, we'll be standing outside the arena with another
twenty things listening.
Speaker 5 (06:06):
But well we will be able to hear it. So
we could just go to a bar nearby if we
can't get tickets. But yeah, I mean literally we're begging.
Speaker 1 (06:12):
It's crazy. I mean I've seen some crazy things in
my career, you know, people trying to get into different shows.
I've never seen anything quite like this. So anyway, Yeah,
but I don't know. I really don't know what I'm
going to do.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Anyone like in your past that you're trying to reconnect with.
Speaker 1 (06:27):
I don't know. I don't know what you don't.
Speaker 6 (06:31):
Want this man today figuring that out. He don't want
you to talk to He said you don't need to
be in a relationship. Now he's saying you don't need
to take good day?
Speaker 2 (06:38):
What is it?
Speaker 1 (06:39):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (06:39):
What's going on?
Speaker 1 (06:40):
What's to take those those former two His former two.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
Relationships logo is rue feeling love.
Speaker 7 (06:52):
I don't want Fred to be taking advantage of for
this ticket.
Speaker 2 (06:56):
Somebody's going to take advantage of us if he gets.
Speaker 4 (06:59):
Sick, Glory, would your sister come in and come in
for the weekend and go with you?
Speaker 2 (07:05):
I don't know she does love Taylor.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
Maybe maybe she would, but I don't know, Like how
many more tickets you got? Yeah, I don't know. I
don't think she wants to leave. I don't think she
wants to sleep Polly for that. Take your moms, bring
moms into town. Yeah, don't start, don't start that. Yes,
I love my mom, but I don't I don't know.
I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker 6 (07:27):
Because she would get you to meet Taylor. She would
actually get all of us if.
Speaker 1 (07:30):
You take her. Make sure we friends already probably petting
the cat. What's the cat from? Is that? What is it?
The Great's anatomy?
Speaker 5 (07:45):
Rishka, Meredith, Grace the other one.
Speaker 1 (07:49):
My mom probably got the cat right now? Pat, Yes,
Oliver watching. Oliver probably just made Taylor's for breakfast.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
Yeah, she's girls with andrews Weft.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
I feel like they would be best friend you actually would,
I could see it.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
Yeah, they're both very sweet mamas.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
My mom could tuck her way into absolutely anything. I love.
Another thing I will say, and just in general, is
I'm kind of amazed. I was at an event recently
where for part and I don't want to like promote
this because they will get you, but I was at
an event recently where one person I knew had a
credential and I didn't yet because the credential was where
you needed a credential to go to get it, you
(08:23):
know what I'm saying. Like it was backstage, but it's
amazing how far you can get if you just act
like you belong.
Speaker 5 (08:28):
Oh Ye and Brandon.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
One person I was with had to pass, but but
like I don't know, I just walked with him like
I like he was my escort, like like I was
the star and he was supposed to be taking me around,
and no one said a word. I mean I literally
gained access from outside the building all the way to
a dressing room, and all I did was just act
like I'm supposed to be there. That's the key, if
you just act, if you just act with confidence, it's
(08:54):
amazing how many people will believe what you're doing in
a lot of situations.
Speaker 5 (08:58):
A friend in high school who was so good at this.
He would he bought like one of those lights that
you can put on top of your car and it
would blink but it was yellow, but he would still
ride the shoulder and get out of traffic. He also
at concerts would like have some sort of medical badge
and just show it to people and take us straight
to the front like that.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
People just believed him.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
I had a buddy in college and it was obnoxious,
but it worked. We'd go into a restaurant and it
would be like a two hour weight and he'd walk
up to the thing and be like, yeah, you know,
can we get a table for four or whatever? And
they'll be like, sorry to two hour weight and he'd go, oh,
you tell me, James didn't call ahead, and he had
this whole skit. I'm dead serious, and they'd be and
the hostess would be like, I'm sorry. He'd be like,
(09:37):
I'm in town for a tennis tournament and James didn't call.
I had this is the only food I want and
he'd like start to throw like a little bit of
a fit and all, and we would always get a
table like like just like that. Yeah, he'd be like,
so you didn't get a call from James, Like James, No, No,
I don't know what we're talking about. I don't want
to make a big deal out of this. But it
was always a tennis tournament. I'm here for this tennis
(10:00):
in a minut and apparently I don't have a table
and it's like this is terrible, and it was his
whole thing, and then we'd all but we would always
get a table and then usually we get something comped
on top of that because they felt bad. They didn't
know who this guy was, because he wasn't anyone.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
How did you keep a straight face?
Speaker 1 (10:15):
I didn't have the time because the first time he
did it, I didn't know he was gonna do it,
and it embarrassed me every single time. I only went
out with him a few times, but every time there
was no table. Damn it, you didn't hear from my management.
James didn't call. Oh no, I don't think he did.
I think he did. And I think there's a little
snafoo going on here. I think you forgot to write
it down because i'mupposed to have a table right now.
(10:36):
I brought my friends. You're embarrassing me and it always worked.
Oh my, yeah, I'm not still friends with this guy.
Speaker 2 (10:43):
I was gonna say, that's clutch.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
I also don't have the confidence to do that. Like,
I know, I can be a jackass, but I'm not
that big of a jackass. Like I don't I don't know. Yeah,
I would start laughing.
Speaker 4 (10:52):
Yeah, I think they're so funny, and they'll be like, well,
they're not funny. They think they're actually being like for
real and they'll be like, tell them who you are am?
I damn it, fucking nothing toilet.
Speaker 1 (11:03):
Well who I am? Yes, a few times I've attempted that,
and I do it like in such a way that
I'm trying to be like. I do it in like
a favor forward way. The very few times in my
life that I've tried to get around a line or something,
and it's like I try and trade and I lead
with like what's in it for them? Every time I
(11:24):
try it, I get a I don't know who you
are basically, so I don't and that's what you deserve.
That's what you deserve when you try and pull it.
Do you know who I am? Card? So I just
don't do it because I don't want to be humiliated.
Speaker 5 (11:36):
I went on a date with a guy who straight
up just gave a fake name for the reservation and
like didn't tell me, And then when we got there,
he said the fake name and I was.
Speaker 2 (11:42):
Like, who the fuck are you? He was nobody? What
do you think you're a celebrity?
Speaker 3 (11:46):
What was the reason.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
I don't know if he thought I would be turned on?
I was like, what the fuck is going on?
Speaker 1 (11:51):
What was the name? I meant I met I just
a random guy recently. I want to say his name
was Michael Jordan. I want to say that was his name.
And so he would call and say, I need a
reservation for Michael Jordan. And he never said I'm that Michael.
He just said Michael Jordan. And he'd always get the
best table in the restaurant. And there was always disappointment
on everybody's face when they saw that it was this
(12:12):
white dude. But he wasn't lying. He knew what he
was doing. But his name was Michael. That's my name.
My name is Michael Jordan, you know. So he'd walk
in there and they'd be like, is anyone else coming?
He's like, no, I'm Michael Jordan. That's me, and oh god, okay,
and then sit down. But I also hear Michael Jordan
like to pay his bill when he goes to a restaurant.
He just thinks it should be calm. So they were
(12:33):
probably happy they got paid. But yeah, and one more
thing on the tangent today because I couldn't do the
story earlier, but this is an actual news headline from
I don't even know where. This is Eastern Europe somewhere.
Maybe this is the actual headline. The student association at
(12:54):
this college is under fire for ring toss game involving
stripper's anus.
Speaker 5 (13:00):
Wait, I'm going to need that one.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
A student association under fire for ring toss game involving
strippers anus.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
Okay, I can imagine how that game went.
Speaker 1 (13:11):
Yeah, sou and it was a professor. I guess it
was doing it. So the university is under fire for
a photos circulating on social media showing members playing ring
toss with the goal of getting a ring over a
bottle that was held in a stripper's ass. The university
(13:32):
strongly disapproves of the behavior and has reported the incident
to the relevant authorities. The person responsible has received an
appropriate sanction. So I I, yeah, I don't I'm a
little unclear. It alludes to a professor being involved with this.
Maybe was a student, just a student, I don't know,
But yeah, that was the headline though, And obviously I
(13:55):
couldn't do that on the air this morning, but I'm like,
that's a hell of a headline. Students s Sociation under
fire for ring toss game involving strippers anus, Like, how
do you set that one up? Like the stripper comes
to the party, and you're like, hey, so this is
what we're thinking. This bottle there and then we're just
gonna throw rings at it. And by the way, that's
a very dangerous game. It's a stick of glass bottle.
(14:19):
But only once and and everything was fine. But I know.
I have a friend who's a physician. He was telling
me when he was going through training and he was
in whatever what do they call it, a resident He
was doing his rotation in the r and a dude
came in with a glass bottle all the way up
his ass. Oh, and and so that he was he
(14:42):
was just like, there was an attending, so he was assisting,
but he was I guess the attending was like, how
did you? How did this get here? And the guy
he said that, he said, I slipped and fell and
the bottle went up my ass. And the reason why
it was important for him to know the real reason
was because it was going to probably help them get
it out, Like, however it went in, we're going to
try and use the same method to get it out.
(15:03):
But what I didn't realize is that's actually extremely dangerous
because in the process of removing glass from your asshole, yeah,
it can break and sever an artery or an organ
and in which case that's a serious emergency. And then
apparently if it has to be surgically removed, they have
to go from the front. Huh, So they would have
(15:24):
to go like through your stomach, because I guess they
can't go through the because it's as your spine is
there or whatever. So it's a very serious surgery. But
somehow they were able to get this thing out, lub
it up and pull it out or whatever without surgery.
But he was the reason he told me the story
is because he was saying that it taught him about empathy,
because everybody was really mad at this guy for lying
(15:47):
and his thing was and he was mad too, like
they were all mad. They're like, we need to know
the truth, Like tell us what really happened. We don't
give a shit, We just need to get this thing
out of your asshole. And the guy kept on. I
slipped and fell and so his thing was. In my career,
I've learned that patients don't often tell the truth because
they're out of fear of being judged, and as opposed
(16:09):
to getting frustrated with them or angry, you have to
have an understanding of what they might be going through
as the person with the Bible in their asshole.
Speaker 5 (16:16):
I'm empathetic, but I also wonder if he knew there's
other things that you could stick up there that are
made for them.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
And that's the thing that surprises me is apparently it's
if you're an er doctor. Stuff in the butt is
extremely common, and it's often not stuff that's supposed to
be there. So I've talked to doctors about this before,
like friends of mine, like, what's the craziest thing you've
And usually it has something to do with buttholes.
Speaker 3 (16:39):
It's the craziest thing to butthole.
Speaker 1 (16:41):
Yeah, I'll be honest. He'd probably be here for an hour,
as you know, write that one we're doing tomorrow. Oh
my god, the channels just keep that other so here
(17:02):
it is, I found it. You're right. They do make
That's the public service that we're leaving you with. On
the tangent. They make things to put in your ass.
Don't use a glass bottle. Thanks, Okay, you add that
to the constitution. Add that to our constitution. Only put
(17:23):
things in your ass that are intended for an asterisk
next to that one, because we can't we can't read
that one to everybody, it's the Tangent and catch up
with the show anytime and all the other episodes on
the iHeartRadio web search for The Tangent
I just Taylor needs to ends, not as a human.
Taylor needs to come perform, make everybody happy for three nights,
and then get the hell out of here and it's over.
I think the whole tour needs to end, actually, because
I think people are going to start getting the impression
that somehow we can get them tickets in other cities too,
So the whole thing just needs to come and go
and everyone needs to be happy. Hit the tangent intro thing.
(00:22):
Let's go, Rufio. It's the tangent with the bread show,
giving you all the we couldn't talk about on air. Yeah,
I'm tired of it. I'm tired of it and I
don't even know if people are messing with me now.
But more and more texts, Hey where are my tailor tickets? Hey?
Can I get Taylor tickets? Even Mama Marta yesterday texted
you and said, hey, can I get two Taylor Swift tickets?
(00:43):
Where are you? Where are you living? Marta?
Speaker 2 (00:46):
Marta Taylor is.
Speaker 3 (00:47):
I was going to ask were they for her? Because
I would think about it. Maybe for Marta, but I no, no,
she knows the Taylor Swift song.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
No, not for her.
Speaker 4 (00:56):
That'd be something though it's like Marta, I know, come
on to the show, mom, and it shows there is nothing.
Speaker 1 (01:03):
Nothing announces that your mom is not supporting us. Then
her asking for the hardest ticket in the world, my
hustle to get. I just needed to come and go.
I do needed to come and go.
Speaker 5 (01:14):
But can I go after Detroit because I think Jason
and I are going to go try to hit this
next weekend after.
Speaker 1 (01:18):
The d I said the whole two I just everyone
just as planned, Everything goes, everyone be happy, everyone enjoyed themselves.
I just I can't help you, and so none of
us can. So sorry.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
And you didn't believe in us that we could see
multiple shows. So if we if we go to multiple shows.
Speaker 1 (01:35):
Okay, I think you guys got three cities in you guys.
I think you were well, no, no, no. What I was
giving you a hard time about is that you were
you were. You both were so flippantly before the ticket
Master debacle, going oh, I'm going to go.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
Because it's always been that we're going to hit up Foxborough.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
We're not Troy. We'll pull through, uh, you know, swing
through and sold your field, go to l A or
good Arizona. Probably we'll probably hit up the d I
don't know. We'll probably get through your.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
Yes, it is because that's how it was.
Speaker 3 (02:06):
I'm sorry, I have dreams, you guys to.
Speaker 5 (02:13):
People that don't even like her are going and that's
the literal reason.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
Cloue.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
Yeah, everybody wants Cloud, everybody wants to pick there.
Speaker 1 (02:20):
But where were y'all boy during love where someone just
left the fuse? Where are y'all y'all?
Speaker 3 (02:26):
You need to call him down because I had to.
Speaker 5 (02:29):
We had to ride for that Cardivans.
Speaker 1 (02:32):
Yeah, look at that. Push it. All you got to
do is push. I got a new button over here.
It's the Caylin Jason button. I pushed that. Watch them
just explode and then I leave the room for twenty minutes. Yeah,
but you you were saying off the air, you know,
you were asking me, Caitlin, what the sort of application
process is going to be if I'm giving a plus one?
First of all, for the record, I don't even know
(02:55):
that I was asked. If I was, It was the
text why You're going to Taylor Swift from somebody at
the record label. I said, okay, sure, I mean that's
very nice. I would like to I would like to
go I like Taylor Swift. I'd like to go. But
what I'm un clear on is what that means, Like
do I get to take someone with me? Do I not?
But if I do, this is gonna be tricky, Okay.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Can I can?
Speaker 5 (03:20):
Jason and I have like clipboards and have some sort
of like casting.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
I need a pro cons list for you to bring
everybody in here and they can audition like it's a
movie or something shot.
Speaker 3 (03:31):
I need. I need to know like their top favorite
not single song, what.
Speaker 2 (03:37):
Would they wear to the show? Very important? Would they
leave early? Very important?
Speaker 6 (03:42):
Right?
Speaker 3 (03:42):
Exactly.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
It's amazing some of the people who, like one person
reached out to me who I went on one date with
like a year ago, and she ship all over radio
and the person's kind of in the business and was like, oh,
I don't radio this, radio that, and and the person
also on the date was telling me how connected she was.
(04:03):
And yet somehow I am the last person on earth
that can get her tickets and I work on the radio. WHOA, OK, No,
I'm you said too much?
Speaker 2 (04:15):
You said too much, way too much? Does she know who?
How you paid for that dinner?
Speaker 1 (04:20):
Of course, It's just that's the number of people that
ship on the business. And then it's like, oh, but
you don't see the mind, you know, asking me for
tickets and the most difficult thing to access, want to
why because we can get in? Can we work at
the radio?
Speaker 2 (04:32):
So do you have anyone in mind?
Speaker 5 (04:33):
Because I mean you had literally you have the power
to make someone's life.
Speaker 1 (04:37):
I don't want that power. I don't want that power.
And I don't know what to do. I really don't.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
With great gifts come great responsibility.
Speaker 7 (04:45):
If you take any don't take any kind of date.
Take someone that's like deserving that wants to go to
this concert. No, like I feel like Fred should like
pay forward to like you know, like I don't know,
like someone in the hospital, or someone in the exist
or someone doing that.
Speaker 2 (04:59):
You know what I'm saying, Yeah, have a nice date night.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
Yeah I don't. I don't. I mean I think that's
a very nice idea. I don't know how possible it is.
And to be honest with you, if it were up
to me, and it's not, if it were up to
because I'm someone's guest, I would just give them. I
would give whatever access I have to someone who really
want I mean, because I want to go, but I don't.
It's not. My life doesn't depend on it. But some
of the stories that we're getting, it's like I wish
(05:24):
we could help, but we can't. Guys, Like, it's it
I know, I I oh, man, some of the stuff
I'm reading, it's like it's just oh, it's heartbreaking. But
I'm like, yeah, please don't. At the end of the
email say oh, but but Taylor Swift would solve all
my problems, It's like, well, it won't, and I don't
have I can't. We can't do it.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
We literally cannot.
Speaker 4 (05:45):
We got a message in our YEAH and our DMS
the other day too, and it makes me really sad.
I'm telling you guys, like, it just makes me sad
to read those stories and.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
We wish we could so hard. It's true.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
We do like we don't have any connections.
Speaker 5 (05:56):
Jason, I are literally driving to Detroit and we're gonna
like try to scalp ticket outside of the arena, Like
we have a zero connection.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
It's like it's embarrassing.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
If not, we'll be standing outside the arena with another
twenty things listening.
Speaker 5 (06:06):
But well we will be able to hear it. So
we could just go to a bar nearby if we
can't get tickets. But yeah, I mean literally we're begging.
Speaker 1 (06:12):
It's crazy. I mean I've seen some crazy things in
my career, you know, people trying to get into different shows.
I've never seen anything quite like this. So anyway, Yeah,
but I don't know. I really don't know what I'm
going to do.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Anyone like in your past that you're trying to reconnect with.
Speaker 1 (06:27):
I don't know. I don't know what you don't.
Speaker 6 (06:31):
Want this man today figuring that out. He don't want
you to talk to He said you don't need to
be in a relationship. Now he's saying you don't need
to take good day?
Speaker 2 (06:38):
What is it?
Speaker 1 (06:39):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (06:39):
What's going on?
Speaker 1 (06:40):
What's to take those those former two His former two.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
Relationships logo is rue feeling love.
Speaker 7 (06:52):
I don't want Fred to be taking advantage of for
this ticket.
Speaker 2 (06:56):
Somebody's going to take advantage of us if he gets.
Speaker 4 (06:59):
Sick, Glory, would your sister come in and come in
for the weekend and go with you?
Speaker 2 (07:05):
I don't know she does love Taylor.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
Maybe maybe she would, but I don't know, Like how
many more tickets you got? Yeah, I don't know. I
don't think she wants to leave. I don't think she
wants to sleep Polly for that. Take your moms, bring
moms into town. Yeah, don't start, don't start that. Yes,
I love my mom, but I don't I don't know.
I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker 6 (07:27):
Because she would get you to meet Taylor. She would
actually get all of us if.
Speaker 1 (07:30):
You take her. Make sure we friends already probably petting
the cat. What's the cat from? Is that? What is it?
The Great's anatomy?
Speaker 5 (07:45):
Rishka, Meredith, Grace the other one.
Speaker 1 (07:49):
My mom probably got the cat right now? Pat, Yes,
Oliver watching. Oliver probably just made Taylor's for breakfast.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
Yeah, she's girls with andrews Weft.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
I feel like they would be best friend you actually would,
I could see it.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
Yeah, they're both very sweet mamas.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
My mom could tuck her way into absolutely anything. I love.
Another thing I will say, and just in general, is
I'm kind of amazed. I was at an event recently
where for part and I don't want to like promote
this because they will get you, but I was at
an event recently where one person I knew had a
credential and I didn't yet because the credential was where
you needed a credential to go to get it, you
(08:23):
know what I'm saying. Like it was backstage, but it's
amazing how far you can get if you just act
like you belong.
Speaker 5 (08:28):
Oh Ye and Brandon.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
One person I was with had to pass, but but
like I don't know, I just walked with him like
I like he was my escort, like like I was
the star and he was supposed to be taking me around,
and no one said a word. I mean I literally
gained access from outside the building all the way to
a dressing room, and all I did was just act
like I'm supposed to be there. That's the key, if
you just act, if you just act with confidence, it's
(08:54):
amazing how many people will believe what you're doing in
a lot of situations.
Speaker 5 (08:58):
A friend in high school who was so good at this.
He would he bought like one of those lights that
you can put on top of your car and it
would blink but it was yellow, but he would still
ride the shoulder and get out of traffic. He also
at concerts would like have some sort of medical badge
and just show it to people and take us straight
to the front like that.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
People just believed him.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
I had a buddy in college and it was obnoxious,
but it worked. We'd go into a restaurant and it
would be like a two hour weight and he'd walk
up to the thing and be like, yeah, you know,
can we get a table for four or whatever? And
they'll be like, sorry to two hour weight and he'd go, oh,
you tell me, James didn't call ahead, and he had
this whole skit. I'm dead serious, and they'd be and
the hostess would be like, I'm sorry. He'd be like,
(09:37):
I'm in town for a tennis tournament and James didn't call.
I had this is the only food I want and
he'd like start to throw like a little bit of
a fit and all, and we would always get a
table like like just like that. Yeah, he'd be like,
so you didn't get a call from James, Like James, No, No,
I don't know what we're talking about. I don't want
to make a big deal out of this. But it
was always a tennis tournament. I'm here for this tennis
(10:00):
in a minut and apparently I don't have a table
and it's like this is terrible, and it was his
whole thing, and then we'd all but we would always
get a table and then usually we get something comped
on top of that because they felt bad. They didn't
know who this guy was, because he wasn't anyone.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
How did you keep a straight face?
Speaker 1 (10:15):
I didn't have the time because the first time he
did it, I didn't know he was gonna do it,
and it embarrassed me every single time. I only went
out with him a few times, but every time there
was no table. Damn it, you didn't hear from my management.
James didn't call. Oh no, I don't think he did.
I think he did. And I think there's a little
snafoo going on here. I think you forgot to write
it down because i'mupposed to have a table right now.
(10:36):
I brought my friends. You're embarrassing me and it always worked.
Oh my, yeah, I'm not still friends with this guy.
Speaker 2 (10:43):
I was gonna say, that's clutch.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
I also don't have the confidence to do that. Like,
I know, I can be a jackass, but I'm not
that big of a jackass. Like I don't I don't know. Yeah,
I would start laughing.
Speaker 4 (10:52):
Yeah, I think they're so funny, and they'll be like, well,
they're not funny. They think they're actually being like for
real and they'll be like, tell them who you are am?
I damn it, fucking nothing toilet.
Speaker 1 (11:03):
Well who I am? Yes, a few times I've attempted that,
and I do it like in such a way that
I'm trying to be like. I do it in like
a favor forward way. The very few times in my
life that I've tried to get around a line or something,
and it's like I try and trade and I lead
with like what's in it for them? Every time I
(11:24):
try it, I get a I don't know who you
are basically, so I don't and that's what you deserve.
That's what you deserve when you try and pull it.
Do you know who I am? Card? So I just
don't do it because I don't want to be humiliated.
Speaker 5 (11:36):
I went on a date with a guy who straight
up just gave a fake name for the reservation and
like didn't tell me, And then when we got there,
he said the fake name and I was.
Speaker 2 (11:42):
Like, who the fuck are you? He was nobody? What
do you think you're a celebrity?
Speaker 3 (11:46):
What was the reason.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
I don't know if he thought I would be turned on?
I was like, what the fuck is going on?
Speaker 1 (11:51):
What was the name? I meant I met I just
a random guy recently. I want to say his name
was Michael Jordan. I want to say that was his name.
And so he would call and say, I need a
reservation for Michael Jordan. And he never said I'm that Michael.
He just said Michael Jordan. And he'd always get the
best table in the restaurant. And there was always disappointment
on everybody's face when they saw that it was this
(12:12):
white dude. But he wasn't lying. He knew what he
was doing. But his name was Michael. That's my name.
My name is Michael Jordan, you know. So he'd walk
in there and they'd be like, is anyone else coming?
He's like, no, I'm Michael Jordan. That's me, and oh god, okay,
and then sit down. But I also hear Michael Jordan
like to pay his bill when he goes to a restaurant.
He just thinks it should be calm. So they were
(12:33):
probably happy they got paid. But yeah, and one more
thing on the tangent today because I couldn't do the
story earlier, but this is an actual news headline from
I don't even know where. This is Eastern Europe somewhere.
Maybe this is the actual headline. The student association at
(12:54):
this college is under fire for ring toss game involving
stripper's anus.
Speaker 5 (13:00):
Wait, I'm going to need that one.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
A student association under fire for ring toss game involving
strippers anus.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
Okay, I can imagine how that game went.
Speaker 1 (13:11):
Yeah, sou and it was a professor. I guess it
was doing it. So the university is under fire for
a photos circulating on social media showing members playing ring
toss with the goal of getting a ring over a
bottle that was held in a stripper's ass. The university
(13:32):
strongly disapproves of the behavior and has reported the incident
to the relevant authorities. The person responsible has received an
appropriate sanction. So I I, yeah, I don't I'm a
little unclear. It alludes to a professor being involved with this.
Maybe was a student, just a student, I don't know,
But yeah, that was the headline though, And obviously I
(13:55):
couldn't do that on the air this morning, but I'm like,
that's a hell of a headline. Students s Sociation under
fire for ring toss game involving strippers anus, Like, how
do you set that one up? Like the stripper comes
to the party, and you're like, hey, so this is
what we're thinking. This bottle there and then we're just
gonna throw rings at it. And by the way, that's
a very dangerous game. It's a stick of glass bottle.
(14:19):
But only once and and everything was fine. But I know.
I have a friend who's a physician. He was telling
me when he was going through training and he was
in whatever what do they call it, a resident He
was doing his rotation in the r and a dude
came in with a glass bottle all the way up
his ass. Oh, and and so that he was he
(14:42):
was just like, there was an attending, so he was assisting,
but he was I guess the attending was like, how
did you? How did this get here? And the guy
he said that, he said, I slipped and fell and
the bottle went up my ass. And the reason why
it was important for him to know the real reason
was because it was going to probably help them get
it out, Like, however it went in, we're going to
try and use the same method to get it out.
(15:03):
But what I didn't realize is that's actually extremely dangerous
because in the process of removing glass from your asshole, yeah,
it can break and sever an artery or an organ
and in which case that's a serious emergency. And then
apparently if it has to be surgically removed, they have
to go from the front. Huh, So they would have
(15:24):
to go like through your stomach, because I guess they
can't go through the because it's as your spine is
there or whatever. So it's a very serious surgery. But
somehow they were able to get this thing out, lub
it up and pull it out or whatever without surgery.
But he was the reason he told me the story
is because he was saying that it taught him about empathy,
because everybody was really mad at this guy for lying
(15:47):
and his thing was and he was mad too, like
they were all mad. They're like, we need to know
the truth, Like tell us what really happened. We don't
give a shit, We just need to get this thing
out of your asshole. And the guy kept on. I
slipped and fell and so his thing was. In my career,
I've learned that patients don't often tell the truth because
they're out of fear of being judged, and as opposed
(16:09):
to getting frustrated with them or angry, you have to
have an understanding of what they might be going through
as the person with the Bible in their asshole.
Speaker 5 (16:16):
I'm empathetic, but I also wonder if he knew there's
other things that you could stick up there that are
made for them.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
And that's the thing that surprises me is apparently it's
if you're an er doctor. Stuff in the butt is
extremely common, and it's often not stuff that's supposed to
be there. So I've talked to doctors about this before,
like friends of mine, like, what's the craziest thing you've
And usually it has something to do with buttholes.
Speaker 3 (16:39):
It's the craziest thing to butthole.
Speaker 1 (16:41):
Yeah, I'll be honest. He'd probably be here for an hour,
as you know, write that one we're doing tomorrow. Oh
my god, the channels just keep that other so here
(17:02):
it is, I found it. You're right. They do make
That's the public service that we're leaving you with. On
the tangent. They make things to put in your ass.
Don't use a glass bottle. Thanks, Okay, you add that
to the constitution. Add that to our constitution. Only put
(17:23):
things in your ass that are intended for an asterisk
next to that one, because we can't we can't read
that one to everybody, it's the Tangent and catch up
with the show anytime and all the other episodes on
the iHeartRadio web search for The Tangent
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