Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:06):
Nice.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
Hell, Hello, and welcome my favorite murder the minisode where
we reach you ear stories.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Do you like emails? I'm gonna go first, guys, it's Friday.
We're recording this on Friday with.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
Video, so we have to actually put makeup on.
Speaker 3 (00:34):
Yeah, it's exhausting this job.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
Oh god, it's hard. Okay. Oh. The subject light of
my first email is teenage cashiers saves the Day. Hello.
I feel like the cute greeting sentences have been done
to death.
Speaker 3 (00:51):
There it is.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
Back in the late nineties, I was the mother of
two small children, ages fifteen months and two years. My
husband was a manager in retail and worked very long hours.
He'd leave for work before SunUp and wouldn't get home
until the children were in bed. It was usually just
me and my little ones taking on the world.
Speaker 2 (01:10):
You don't even have like Instagram to like distract her
once in a while, can you imagine.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
Right, Because it's the late nineties, it was like her
and Jerry Springer doing their best. One scorching day in Houston,
we were out running errands. I stopped at a gas
station to get us drinks, as was usual at that time.
My brain wasn't always functioning on all cylinders. Hello welcome.
Toddler's exhaustion and undiagnosed anxiety and add had me rattled
(01:36):
most of the time. I pulled into a parking space
in front of the building, jumped out of my van
and walked around to the sliding door to get the
kids out. I was frustrated that the door didn't open
when I pulled on the handle, thinking the lock must
not have been disengaged. I treked back to the driver's
door to push the unlocked button, and it wouldn't open either.
I had left my keys in the van and locked
(01:57):
my kids in. Oh God, Now I know what you're thinking,
and this is in quotes kids locked in a hot
car on a scorching day. Don't fret. I hadn't only
forgotten my keys in the van. They were still in
the ignition and the engine was still running. I had
failed to even turn off the car, so even though
I wasn't worried about the heat, I was still panicking.
(02:19):
Yet Thank God, the car I'm still running.
Speaker 3 (02:21):
Seriously.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
Who My fifteen month old was asleep, so he was
no help, But my two year old was awake and
staring at me through the wind. Oh my god, Oh
my god, they're two. Like there's no there's not even
a five year old to communicate with, true babies. I
tried to get her to unlock the door, like she
was going to unbuckle her harness, to throw off the
(02:42):
straps of her car seat and jump to the rescue.
No luck. I went into the store and tried to
explain to the teenage boy behind the counter what happened.
Before I could finish my explanation, and without saying a word,
the boy ran from behind the counter, passed me, and
out the door. I watched him run to a van,
yelling driver had just got in behind the wheel and
was pulling away from the pump. My brain couldn't comprehend
(03:04):
what was happening until I saw what was written on
the side of the van locksmith. Yes, yes, this kid
had noticed the locksmith van at the pump and sprung
into action when I came in panicking. He was able
to stop the vehicle, and the lovely young locksmith unlocked
my van free of charge. Dude, looking back, I know
(03:25):
my kids weren't in danger, but that teenage boy and
young locksmith were both heroes. Thanks for reading my story.
Stay sexy and maybe put down your phone and pay
attention to what's going on around you. You just might
be someone's hero. Vicky, I love that.
Speaker 3 (03:41):
I love that so beautiful.
Speaker 1 (03:44):
Karen concern, Oh my god, try it?
Speaker 2 (03:49):
Who am I talking to?
Speaker 1 (03:50):
Give it a oh?
Speaker 2 (03:53):
Not reading you the subject? Hi, Karen and Georgia. I'll
get right to it. My grandma, Juanita was a og
murdery now. She and my grandpa Emilio lived next door
to us for most of my childhood and helped raise me.
We would watch Jeopardy and Lawn Order SVU every night.
Now that I'm older, I realized that I was way
too young to be watching Lawn Order at nine years old,
(04:15):
and SVU, which is like double hardcore.
Speaker 1 (04:17):
It's very not a good idea for a nine year old.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
But what can I say? That show has been on
for twenty six seasons for a reason, That's right. My
grandma passed away recently, but lived well into her nineties.
She was a badass farmer whose weapon of choice was
a shovel. She was known to have cut down a
wasp's nest without protection and killed a rattlesnake. Holy sit,
I'm so happy that I grew up next door to her,
because she influences my choices to this day. But let's
(04:42):
get to why I wrote this email. In California middle
school in the early two thousands, I took the US
Constitution test. If you got more than ninety percent, you
got to go to Outback Steakhouse, and it's got two
little stars around Outback Steakhouse Special where they would have
a little Sarah Moony and give you a certificate. They
obviously got ninety percent because it says I remember. There
(05:05):
was an attorney who seemed to be important, who took
pictures with us and gave a speech. At the end
of his speech, he opened the Florida Questions, being that
I watched Lawn Order S for You so much. I
felt like I knew a thing or two about the
court system, but was confused about some aspects of the
charges laid against people in the show. So I raised
my hand and asked, what is the difference between murder
(05:25):
one and murder two? That man's face was burned into
my memory because he looked horrified, Slash confused, Slash amused,
and then said next question. Years later, I thought this
was all a weird, made up memory but one night,
in an insomnia induced Wikipedia binge, I was looking at
political officials as you do in.
Speaker 3 (05:47):
The middle of the night.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
Sure, it's very comforting.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
And I realized that the important attorney from outback was
the California Attorney General at the time. What if I
ever had the chance to meet again, I would like
him to know that I was not a biding murder
and instead went the opposite direction. I'm a jeria Trician
who saw the injustices in medicine that occurred with my
grandparents and decided I want to correct them.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Shout out to my sister who recommended this podcast to
me when I was in medical school. You ladies got
me through my residency. Where I did I see you
night shifts during the pandemic.
Speaker 1 (06:19):
Oh my god, thank you. No chill there, I mean
also intense bravery. We all claimed our pots and pans. Yeah,
but again and again, everyone should be thanking those essential
workers that truly, when we thought we don't know what's happening,
They're like, anyway, bye, we're gonna take care of some stuff.
Speaker 3 (06:39):
Going to work overnight. Goodbye.
Speaker 2 (06:41):
I came out relatively unscathed, except for a touch of PTSD,
stay sexy, and don't ask the California Attorney General about
the nuances of murder charges.
Speaker 1 (06:51):
LP. She her LP. I think I think that sign
off should have been and definitely ask any your turn
anytime you're around them, any questions that you want. I mean,
while we're here, we should probably recommend. If you don't know,
we have a Law and Order SVU podcast that's right
call that's messed up, and if you love Law and Order,
(07:12):
you should listen to it because it's really good. It's
so good, and they book the actors from Law and
Orders and it's fucking crazy. It's the greatest. Okay, so
this email starts Hello there. I'm currently listening to a
Hometown episode in which Karen talks about her father narrating
parades and stated that it would be so easy to
(07:34):
just sneak in and join the procession. Well, I'm here
to tell you that it can be done, and with
style to boots. Imagine this. It's the early aughts and
you're at a Memorial Day parade in a small Wisconsin city.
You're watching the usual groups and floats go by, high
school marching bands, various armed forces battalions, fire trucks complete
(07:57):
with firefighters throwing candy to the hordes of children, etc.
Speaker 3 (08:01):
Etc.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
Suddenly you come to behold a very strange sight, indeed,
a nineteen eighty one white Chevy Camaro towing a vintage
yellow trailer from the sixties. In the trailer are two
life sized cardboard cutouts, one of former President Bill Clinton
playing a saxop the flock and the other of esteemed
former Green Bay Packers coach Mike Holmgren. There are spray
(08:24):
painted signs on the side of the trailer stating God
bless America and the Fresh Air Brigade. The song Hot
Barbecue by Brother Jack McDuff plays loudly on repeat from
a large speaker. Red white and blue streamers fly from
the back of the trailer. It is Memorial Day. After all.
The Fresh Air Brigade themselves aka my brother and one
(08:44):
of his friends are writing in the Camaro and throwing
taco bell hogs on his pockets to all the eagerly wait.
Speaker 3 (08:52):
Hot sauce peck.
Speaker 2 (08:57):
People are like, hey, they're growing something, and then they
catch a like, oh, I guess put these in that
drawer that we have.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
Some little six year old opens it up and just
starts crying. Yes, that's right. My at the time sixteen
year old brother just pulled into the parade lineup near
the start, and no one stopped them throughout the entire
for an eight mile route. They never got into trouble
afterward either, except for getting quote yelled at pretty severely
(09:24):
by one of our teachers the next day, despite her
having no real authority on what happens during a parade. Yeah,
my brother's one of the funniest people I know, and
this stunt will forever go down in our families and
probably our town's history as one of the greatest, weirdest
things to ever happen at a parade. Stay sexy and
think outside the bun Sam she here, and then it says,
(09:47):
ps pick or it didn't happen, and we have a
fucking pick of this.
Speaker 2 (09:53):
Oh my god, there's a photo of the fucking god
bless the USA. Oh this is way shittier than I
even imagined, right.
Speaker 1 (10:00):
Because the trailer that she's talking about is the cut
off back half of an old Chevy truck.
Speaker 2 (10:06):
I thought it was like a you know, a little
streamline air trailer, and I didn't get it. But this
is just the like the cut off back of a
truck ca maarrow and a.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
Badass barrow and the god bless Usa is spray painted
in black paint on like a piece of cardboards.
Speaker 2 (10:24):
Brigade. Oh my god, I love this.
Speaker 1 (10:27):
What do you think the fresh Air Brigade was referencing
like farting because of taco bell.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
Oh maybe, but that would be nothing.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
Yeah, maybe it's just random. And these guys love to
smoke pot Wow. I love this picture so many.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
Maybe one of their parents was like, you need to
get out of the house and get some fresh air,
and they're like, okay, and then find here's what you
fucking get.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
Yeah, fine, we'll join a parade.
Speaker 2 (10:49):
Then okay, here's my second one. I'm not going to
read to the subject and it just starts, Hello, Alejandra,
you're looking beautiful today. Alahada of course picks our hometowns.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
So yeah, and she picked this one because you can
manipulate Alejandra about her.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
I actually picked this one myself, so Alejandra's off the hook.
She probably would have deleted it.
Speaker 1 (11:10):
She's modest, incredibly modest, almost none like that's right, So
I am officially saying, Alejandro, you like beautiful today you do.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
Thank you okay, pre pandemic listener, which I think qualifies
as long ass time, fourth time writer. First time my
story is being read on the pod because you got
to manifest that shit.
Speaker 1 (11:31):
Right, and you did did manifesting works.
Speaker 2 (11:35):
I'll preface this by saying that I mean no disrespect
to the elder population, but the woman this story is
about was a cuckoo loco, and for the good of humanity,
I will not be silent about that. I grew up
so Mormon that when I was twenty one years old,
I went on a mission to preach the Sweet Gospel
of JC in one of the cities I lived in
my companion, and I taught an eighty seven year old
(11:56):
named Darlene name changed. Darlene lived in a single wide
mobile home. She was legally blind and had two cloudy
eyes that drifted off to separate sides at all times.
She was perpetually dressed in a floral boomo and I'm
here to say no shade us too. And she was
extremely opinionated and frequently interrupted our church lessons by inserting
what she thought the church's rules should be instead. Hell yes,
(12:20):
says go off. Queen for God knows what reason Darlene
decided to get baptized. We set up a meeting with
our district leader, a male missionary who was in charge
of other missionaries, which took place on a Saturday morning.
Speaker 3 (12:33):
A side note.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
In the LDS church, anyone who chooses to be baptized
has to have an interview with the priesthood leader, where
they answer such questions as one, do you believe the
Book of Mormon is the Word of God? Two? Do
you believe Joseph Smith was a prophet of God?
Speaker 3 (12:47):
Etc.
Speaker 2 (12:47):
I'm sure it's multiple choice, right d c Our district
leader told us that Darlene answered all the questions correctly,
so she was good to move forward with her baptism
scheduled for later that i afternoon. He then told us
that there was one thing during the interview that made
him laugh. When asked if she had repented all of
her sins, Darlene said yes, well there is one big
(13:10):
one and drifted off. But our district leader, being nineteen,
didn't find this reason enough to inquire further. He ended
the interview and Darlene was baptized a few hours later.
The next morning, we arrived at church for Darlene's confirmation,
a blessing where the newly baptized person receives the gift
of the Holy Ghost and is confirmed a member of
the LDS Church. However, Darlene was nowhere to be seen.
(13:32):
The church meeting proceeded as scheduled.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
No Darlene.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
After the service, we went to our bishop to ask
if he knew anything about where she might be. And
I bet they get points for each person they recruit,
and they're like, where's our girl. Yes, for sure, we
want God's point.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
That's the whole point of a mission. So it's like,
you're not going to lose that at the at the
eleventh hour.
Speaker 3 (13:50):
No, I need that gold star.
Speaker 2 (13:52):
Jesus, Jesus, please watch this, he says, quote oh, meaning
to tell you, ladies, Darlene is in jail. She was
arrested for arson. And that face that you're making right now,
that oface. There's literally an emoji, even emoji just like
a little two dots in a zero.
Speaker 1 (14:10):
It looks exactly like your I did the match of like.
Speaker 2 (14:13):
Ooh, here's what happened on that Saturday morning before her interview, Yes,
the same interview where she admitted that there was one
big thing she had not repented to. Darlene's trailer caught
on fire and was burnt to a crisp. Everything inside
was ruined. At first, authorities wondered if this was an accident,
blind old lady living alone and everything, but then they
discovered that the night before the fire, Darlene had moved
(14:35):
all of her valuables to a separate storage shed. She
was convicted of arson and spent a few weeks in jail,
but hey, at least she got that baptism in so
she could be forgiven all of her sins. Thank you
so much for doing this podcast. I'm thirty two and
often find myself extremely anxious that I haven't achieved my
life dreams yet. Can you fucking imagine?
Speaker 1 (14:54):
Please, don't even You're.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
Just starting life. You're just starting.
Speaker 1 (14:59):
When you feel that way, go to the movies. When
you feel that way, go do something outside.
Speaker 2 (15:04):
And then it says, then I remember, it's okay. Georgia
was thirty five when she started My favorite murder. It says, sorry, Karen,
I can't remember how old you were.
Speaker 1 (15:12):
If Georgia was thirty five, I was forty five, that's right,
But for real, you remind me that it's never too
late to start doing what you love.
Speaker 2 (15:19):
And I thought thirty five was so old.
Speaker 3 (15:21):
Now it's not.
Speaker 2 (15:22):
You're still fine not knowing what you're gonna do in
your thirties and forties and just doing what pays the
bills until you find something you love.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
Also, Georgia and I for this thing, it's it's not
like we had some plan. It's not like we were
like we have to sit down and figure out the way.
It's like you just try and you try, and you
try try again, and you do stuff and it's fucked
up and you think it's all ruined, and then you
do another thing. They're like, oh, that'll be fun, she
and I'll do and then suddenly you're like standing in
(15:49):
front of three thousand people who are screaming at the
top of your uns.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
Yes, everyone goes at a different pace, and that's totally fine.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
Yeah, you know, do you.
Speaker 1 (15:58):
It's not high school. There's no content. People aren't tracking you.
They're worried about themselves.
Speaker 2 (16:03):
Stay sexy and burn the house down while you have
the chance. You can always have your sins washed away later. Bronwyn,
she her.
Speaker 1 (16:11):
Bronwhen I'm sorry we lectured you so much, but it's
really fun, and that anytime anyone young expresses those things,
it's like, please listen to us. Please. Yeah, I've lived
for over half a century, which is still mind boggling
to me.
Speaker 2 (16:25):
I always think like, Okay, I'm hoping to live to
be like eighty six or so. That means I'm like
halfway done. I haven't done you so much more fucking
time to do the things. Thirty two is like not
even halfway done yet.
Speaker 1 (16:36):
For real, You've got time and thirty two you should
know that you're assuming that people are judging you like, oh,
you haven't done anything, when most people are like, oh,
look at Bronwyn's skin, look at look at Bronwin's overall youth. God,
I wish I had that, like truly don't understand.
Speaker 3 (16:54):
Yeah, wear SBF and have fun.
Speaker 1 (16:59):
And I could highly recommend Korean skincare. Okay, the subject
line of my last email is all caps, vibes, exclamation
point and a sixth sense, sort of happy Monday to
you all today. Minnisodes three ninety three, you asked if
anyone had stories about people who had sort of accurate
(17:21):
vibes when meeting someone good or bad, and my daughter
is one of those people.
Speaker 2 (17:26):
But if she had bad vibes.
Speaker 3 (17:27):
When she met her daughter, the nurse.
Speaker 1 (17:30):
Puts the baby on her chest and she's like, Oh,
this isn't gonna work. When Aaron was just fifteen months old,
she would connect strongly with so many people. She'd smile
and clap her hands with glee to almost anyone she'd
meet or sit next to in a restaurant or out shopping.
You get the point. She could just tell who the
good people were in her little world. Most were all good,
(17:53):
of course. Then one day my old college roommate came
over with her new boyfriend. She wanted us to meet
her latest love interest, and Aarin took one look at
him and screamed bloody murder. Literally one look and she
lost it. My hubby and I were like, this is
so odd. She's never done this before. She must need
a nap. And then in all caps it says nope.
(18:15):
He was a bad dude. It took my friend a
few years to figure it out, but she discovered that
he was a liar, a cheat, and drove her to bankruptcy.
Oh my god, if only we had trusted Aaron's vibes.
A few years later, and then in parentheses it says,
I know you'll find this fascinating erin gave us a
huge gift on the morning after my dad passed away.
(18:37):
He had lived with Parkinson's disease for twenty five years,
and she only knew her papa as basically the special
guy we visited at the long term care facility who
was confined to a wheelchair with limited verbal abilities. So
that morning, when we were obviously so sad, she burst
out of her room she was five at the time
to make the announcement that quote, Papa came to me
(18:59):
last night. He's good. He's chasing birds and making snow angels.
Oh my god, he's chasing birds.
Speaker 2 (19:07):
I make it like things that you have to do
with limbs specifically.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
Yes, Oh he's using his body.
Speaker 3 (19:14):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:14):
And then it just says, well, goosebumps. We absolutely knew
she was telling the truth. He chose her to visit,
I think because he knew that she was open to
receiving his message to all of us. He was a
bird nerd and loved the weather slash four seasons we
have here in Minnesota, so her announcement made perfect sense.
Oh my god, I know what a gift. She changed
(19:36):
our perspective on that sad day and helped us feel
grateful for our time with him on earth and put
a smile on our faces imagining how he was now
able to run and be free.
Speaker 3 (19:45):
Oh my god, I don't cry. I know ever, I'm
about to like a cry.
Speaker 1 (19:49):
You will now.
Speaker 3 (19:49):
This is the closest I think. Oh my god, you'll
get there.
Speaker 1 (19:53):
Aaron's vibes continue to steer her away from the creeps
of the world and keep the good ones close. Stay
sexy and listen to your kiddo. They might have good
intel and either save you from disaster or bring you
an unexpected blessing. Melissa, that is so special. Yeah, oh
my god, there's more going on. There's more going on
than we know.
Speaker 3 (20:13):
That's really beautiful.
Speaker 1 (20:14):
If you want to join the fan call, you can
see Georgia almost crying.
Speaker 2 (20:18):
We just get an influx. We've never gotten this one
fan like, everyone gives a shit them.
Speaker 1 (20:23):
This is the content people are absolutely starving for.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Okay, no, I look like shit. Okay, my last one
is just an MFM cute story. Og listener from twenty
sixteen is the subject line, Okay it's quickie, I'm an
OG listener and met you both at the Fort Lauderdale
show in twenty sixteen with my now ex, a first
responder who had the lion encounter in the eighties, which
you read out on Hometown thirty four or thirty seven.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
Remember that, Yes, yes, I do.
Speaker 3 (20:50):
Fort LAUDERDTT. That was a fun show.
Speaker 1 (20:51):
Yes, it was such a cool theater. Remember it was
kind of like carpeting on the walls kind of it felt.
Speaker 2 (20:56):
Like, yeah, like at a middle school, yes, auditorium or something.
Speaker 3 (21:01):
Mm hmm, that's cool.
Speaker 2 (21:03):
I was listening in episode four thirty eight about the
Zodiac killer copycat on That's when I did in New York. Yeah,
on the way to pick up my elderly mother to
take her to Target. She doesn't like talk radio, so
I turned it off when she got into my car.
I don't like talk radio, I agree with her. We
arrive and she's quietly watching me piece together her mobility scooter,
(21:24):
and out of nowhere, she says, I thought they didn't
catch the Zodiac killer. Taken aback at her timing of topic,
I said they didn't. Then she says, quote, so this
guy was a copycat, she said weirdly, And I asked,
how are you hearing my podcast? I turned it off?
She said, quote, I can hear it in my hearing aids.
Clear as hell. No, no, no, sorry, clear as a bell.
Speaker 3 (21:47):
I wish it was clear as hell.
Speaker 1 (21:49):
Clear as hell.
Speaker 2 (21:50):
Turns out her bluetooth hearing aids, which run from an
app on my phone, was picking up MFM because I'd
only muted it, not turned it off. Oh fucking cool.
Speaker 1 (22:00):
So sorry, so sorry, ma'am.
Speaker 2 (22:02):
So she didn't say anything, She just kept listening and
then was like, maybe I do like talk radio.
Speaker 1 (22:06):
This is the talk radio that she never encountered before.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
That's right, SSDGM and turn off, don't mute, Linda, Linda.
Speaker 1 (22:18):
That's amazing. We won over. We won over someone who
doesn't like this.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
Yeah, hey, hey, welcome to the fold.
Speaker 1 (22:26):
What's them?
Speaker 2 (22:27):
Tell us your stories about your sixth senses?
Speaker 1 (22:31):
And I like hearing about people we've met before. Yeah,
remember I met you? And because there are so many
people I remember from those of.
Speaker 2 (22:38):
You, you remember, its fucking everyone. And then you give
me some weird tidbit of information that I'm like, oh, yeah,
I remember that too.
Speaker 1 (22:46):
Still, never forget the two girls that brought their grandma
bustled her out of the I think we were in
Iowa or Cedar Rapids or was it. No, it was
somewhere super Midwest.
Speaker 2 (22:56):
Yeah, and they were like, we got Grandma to the
nursing home to bring her to this and it was
like ten o'clock at night or something, and she was she.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
Was a super og original Murderino. And then she started
telling us about a case she went to and visit
the jury every day.
Speaker 3 (23:10):
That's right, amazing.
Speaker 1 (23:12):
I love this job.
Speaker 2 (23:13):
Tell us your stories, tell us your ogie Murderino grandma stories.
Speaker 1 (23:16):
Oh my god, Georgia, my sweatpants are on backwards. I
just tried to reach into my pocket and my pockets
are going the other way.
Speaker 2 (23:25):
Stand up and show the fan. Call it your backwards sweatpants.
Come on, you have to do it. Oh my god.
You can grab your own butt whenever you want.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
Thank God, that's so comforting. Jesus Christ.
Speaker 3 (23:39):
Amazing, thanks for listening.
Speaker 1 (23:41):
Yes, we love you. Stay sexy and don't get murdered.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
Kill me, Elvis, do you want a cookie?
Speaker 1 (23:56):
This has been an exactly right production.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
Our senior producer is Alejandra k.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
Our editor is Aristotle Oscevedo.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
This episode was mixed by Leona Squalacci.
Speaker 1 (24:05):
Emailing her hometowns to My Favorite Murder at gmail dot com.
Speaker 2 (24:08):
And follow a show on Instagram and Facebook at my
Favorite Murder and on Twitter at my Fave Murder.
Speaker 3 (24:13):
Goodbye,