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April 2, 2024 5 mins

What is it with guys and their obsession of what would happen if they went to prison?  The guys talked about the hell of a time SBF faces while in prison. 

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Episode Transcript

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Speaker 1 (00:00):
This was my favorite thing over the weekend. And I
don't know why, but I think every guy does this.
This could this could be a meme equal to how
often do you think about the Roman Empire? Is how
often do you think or have you thought about how
you would survive in prison, or what you would do

in prison, or you know, just kind of planning getting
your ducks in a row for if you're in prison.

Speaker 2 (00:27):
Why do you guys think about that?

Speaker 3 (00:28):
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (00:29):
I don't commit crime.

Speaker 1 (00:31):
I'm as likely to be living in the Roman Empire
as to end up in prison. Really, yeah, yeah, it's
it seems unlikely, particularly at this point in my life,
but anyway, I do. So I read with great interest
the whole what Sam Bankman Freed's long stretch in prison
might look like, because he's got a twenty five year

sentence and you serve what three quarters of it minimum
in federal I don't know prison. I think something like that,
But anyway, I'm not a criminal. I don't keep these
facts at hand. Well, when you're stuck in jail, you're
gonna wish you'd thought about it like I have. Anyway,
So the word is the judge who's going to sentence
him Thursday. No, that's when he got sentenced. Anyway, he

doesn't know whether he's going to be in a low
security or medium security prison.

Speaker 2 (01:19):
Yet surely it's low. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:23):
People are making the point that he's got incredibly low
risk for violence. He is on the autism spectrum, and
his association with wealth makes him a target for other prisoners.
So but in a low security facility, you can sleep
in a dormitory style housing and have freedom to move

around the prison. You go up to the biggest, baddest
accountant on the block and you tell him you've got
something you wanted him to declare as a business expense.

Speaker 2 (01:56):
Hilarious, hilarious.

Speaker 1 (01:58):
In a medium security prison, bankmin freed could be serving
time with inmates with long sentences for violent crimes, including
sex offenses.

Speaker 2 (02:05):
Oh, man, I would hate that.

Speaker 1 (02:07):
In many of them, they sleep in cells. Yeah, but
here's the interesting part. I want the kind where you
like play tennis and it's basically like a college dorm.

Speaker 2 (02:17):
Oh interesting.

Speaker 1 (02:18):
Interestingly enough that SBF spent a lot of time in
the Metropolitan New York Detention Center, which is probably the
worst federal jail in the country. He shared a dorm
with a former Honduran president who was recently convicted of
conspiring to traffic drugs. He also used packets of mackerel,
which is an informal jail house currency, to get a haircut.

Mackerel replaced smokes after officials banned smoking trading mackerel. But
so he was in with some baddies at that level,
because I got a friend. I always think about this.
You know, you talk about going to prison. It's unlikely
him going to prison, but a person could end up
in the county jailiety of ways, even if you didn't

do something wrong.

Speaker 2 (03:04):
And I've got a buddy who is.

Speaker 1 (03:07):
Acquaintance, let's call him acquaintance, who has spent a good
chunk of his life in different kinds of jails at
different levels, including prison for long stretches. And he said,
county jail is by far the scariest place. You are,
way scarier because everybody of every stripe is thrown together,
and a lot of them are high and drunk and
angry and all kinds of things. Well, and I've heard

that prison has many written and unwritten rules that everybody
follows because you're going to be there for a long time.
And nobody wants chaos, right, so everybody minds their p's
and ques to some extent county jail.

Speaker 2 (03:41):
It's just nuts. That's horrible. It should not be that way.

Speaker 1 (03:44):
If you get pulled over because you had two glasses
of chardonnay at the restaurant and we're over the line,
didn't think you were.

Speaker 2 (03:50):
You shouldn't be scared for getting raped. For trying to
figure that out through our legal system.

Speaker 1 (03:58):
Yeah, I guess a different topic for another day perhaps,
but a couple of final details about the whole minimum
versus medium security for SBF. Now, there are a couple
of different low security prisons they could put him in,
not far from where his probably crooked communist parents live
at a Lompoke for instance, which is one of the choices.

Speaker 2 (04:17):
It mays have.

Speaker 1 (04:18):
Access to variety of various arts and crafts. According to
the prison handbook Welcome to Prison. It makes her signed
jobs ranging from food service to factory work, which pay
a few cents an hour. Let's see, in minimum security
you can have books in harmonica.

Speaker 2 (04:37):
They mentioned, Hey, I can have an.

Speaker 1 (04:39):
Harmonica, but not in medium security.

Speaker 2 (04:47):
When I stole all their money.

Speaker 3 (04:53):
And I threw it away, my weird little girlfriend should
go away now.

Speaker 1 (05:03):
Your medium security president has six handball courts, two softball fields,
five basketball courts, one soccer field, and one quarter mile track.

Speaker 2 (05:09):
According to its handbook.

Speaker 1 (05:11):
Inmates also have access to treadmills and stair climbers. Oh,
I'm sorry. They are permitted one harmonica, but can play
them only in recreation areas or in the music room
if selected as a band member. Wow, far more harmonica
regulations than I guess would exist, and.

Speaker 2 (05:28):
The only instrument for prisons is are harmonica.

Speaker 1 (05:31):
No, can't have a saxophone or clarinet or acousta qatarily
they're harmonica clarinet. But anyway, good luck, SBF. Maybe don't
steal people's stuff.
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