April 12, 2023 • 12 mins
First Date Follow Up is when we get an email from someone who went on a date and the other person isn't calling back. We get that other person on the phone to see why they're "ghosting".
Sometimes it is not always about getting a second date! Sometimes people just want to know why they are getting ghosted! One of our listeners is getting ghosted and she doesn't really care if she sees the guy again, but just wants to know why she is not getting a call or text back! Find out why in this First Date Follow Up!
Leave a rating and review wherever you listen. It will help the show out in a big way. If that's not your thing, you can find us on social media here:
https://instagram.com/thejubalshow
https://twitter.com/thejubalshow
https://www.tiktok.com/@thejubalshow
Sometimes it is not always about getting a second date! Sometimes people just want to know why they are getting ghosted! One of our listeners is getting ghosted and she doesn't really care if she sees the guy again, but just wants to know why she is not getting a call or text back! Find out why in this First Date Follow Up!
Leave a rating and review wherever you listen. It will help the show out in a big way. If that's not your thing, you can find us on social media here:
https://instagram.com/thejubalshow
https://twitter.com/thejubalshow
https://www.tiktok.com/@thejubalshow
Support the show: https://the-jubal-show.beehiiv.com/subscribe
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
The Jebel Show on Demand First Day follow Up. Jessica
is on the phone today for a first date follow up,
and she's getting ghosted by a dude named Chris. Jessica,
thank you for coming on the show. Before you tell
us about your date, how long has it been since
you heard from Chris. It's a few days with no
response whatsoever, nothing at all. Okay, have you tried to
(00:23):
reach out to him? Oh? Yeah, I've been texting him
because I think it's super weird that we had a
date and then he just stopped texting after weeks of
texting all the time. Yeah, okay, did you guys meet
on an app and we're talking a bunch before you
went out? Yeah, we met on an app and then
we only had one date, which was you know, kind
of basic like happy hour, just some drinks and we
(00:44):
shared an appetizer, but then nothing since that date ended.
Did the date go well? Well? I mean I can't
say that I was like super into him, but nothing
went wrong in the date. Like, it's not that big
of a deal that he goes to me. Except hate
when people don't respond to text She's like, I don't
really like him, but it's the principle at this point.
(01:06):
So it's more just getting ghosted than anything I get
that I need. I want to have to keep thinking
about him. It's like there's no reason too. But there's
something psychologically about being ghosted that makes me like obsessed
over something that I barely even care about. Could that
have come up in the date? It's kind of a
red flag. I'm not sure. Maybe you could tell I
(01:28):
understand you, and I know I'm a walking red flag
at times, and so that's why I'm just asking. I
don't know. I just think it's really rude, Like if
we're old enough to go on a date, then we
should be old enough to say if we're not interested.
And I'm curious, is it me or did he just
not feel a connection or did he go on a
date with someone else? And like the more like all
of that's fine. I would just like to know what
(01:49):
the answer is. If he was still talking to you,
would you want to go out with him again? Or
is it just that you're getting ghosted and you can't
you can't stand not knowing why. It's sort of more
of the ladder, But I'm open. I didn't have a
strong feeling one way or the other on whether we
should go out again. So I'm open. I would just
kind of like to know why he stopped responding to
(02:09):
text messages. So if you think back to the date though,
to your like okay date, was there anything that was
like less okay then normal? Yeah, Normally people are like
I really liked them, and I don't know why they're
ghosting me. You're just like, I don't whatever with him.
I just don't want to be ghosted because if you're
feeling like it was whatever, maybe he thought it was
(02:30):
just whatever too, and so he's like why bother? Yeah,
I guess, but it takes two seconds to be like,
oh I just don't feel a connection or I'm not interested,
you know, like why would you not stop back? Like
I'm actually kind of worried because he was so responsive
before in the date, and he went off smitially on
the date, so I'm worried he might like be really sick. Actually,
are you feeling sick at all? I mean maybe you
(02:52):
know if you feel good, Yeah, I feel totally fine.
So if he did have something, I didn't catch it.
I mean he was really sniffily, like totally nose blocks
and everything. Do you think that he knew you weren't
that into it. Maybe. I mean, like I said, it's
the first date, so it's not like I'm going to
be like dushing over someone right away or like completely uninterested.
(03:13):
I kind of feel like you should give people a chance,
So I don't know. I don't think I gave off
weird signals. Did anything happen on your date that you
think could be a reason that he ghosted you. Yeah,
Like he hugged when we first got there, and it
was a nice hug, Like he came full on in
full body contact. He had, you know, no problem sharing food,
which I like because I think that's like a way
(03:34):
to connect if you're sharing a plate as opposed to
getting your own things. Yeah, like your average date, I
feel like I don't know, Juebill, how do you feel
about going on an average date? Would you want another
date after an average date? Not? Usually No, And I
would be fine getting ghosted because I'm like cool, I
don't have to talk to him again, you know. Yeah, Well,
(03:55):
clearly you're healthier I am. I wouldn't say that he's
been working on it for a while. Yeah, Well, okay,
we'll try to figure out for you what's the last
thing that he said to you? Hello? He said, this
was great, Then I'll talk to you soon. Like it
ended in a positive way that would make you think
that there's going to be communication afterwards. Okay, all right,
(04:16):
well we'll see if we can figure it out for you. Well,
play us on come back and then call him and
find out where you're getting ghosted next. Okay, all right, thanks,
all right. In the middle of today's first date follow
up and if you're just joining us, Jessica is on
the phone and she's getting ghosted by a guy named Chris.
She doesn't really care that much about Chris, but she
wants to know why he's ghosting or real quick, Jessica,
(04:37):
for anybody just joining us, give us a recap of
your situation. So I went on a date with christ
Things went fine. I'm not sure if I even want
a second date, but he stopped responding to text and
it's driving me crazy. So I have to find out why. Okay,
you know what she's doing it for all the people
that just are like, well why not, I'm bomb yeah
(04:57):
you know, yeah. I mean, if I'm going on a
date and there's ghosting involved, it better be from me. Okay, Yeah,
we're about to call him and try to figure out
why he's ghosting here. All right, Jessica, are you ready?
I'm so ready. Okay, here we go one Dalla's phone number. Yeah,
(05:23):
this is Chris. Hello, Chris, how are you? This is
Jewel from The Jewel Show. It's a radio show. Hi, Chris.
I'm Nina also on that show. That's Nina, and then
Victoria's over there. There's three people on the phone with
you right now. What's up, Chris? I'm so sorry? What
is going on? We do a segment on our show
and it's called the First Date follow Up. It's where
you go out on a date with somebody and then
you end up ghosting them. They asked if we can
(05:45):
get you on the phone and figure out what happened,
and we got an email about you from somebody that
you went on a date with recently. Yeah, okay, now
I know what this is about. Brilliant. Hi, Okay, so
you do know who we're talking about. So is there
somebody your ghosts in particular? Yeah? No, Recently I have
been receiving a lot of texts and I haven't been
replying to them, just honestly, because I haven't known how
(06:08):
to let me guess this is Jessica online. That a
good guess. I Hi, Jessica, how how are you doing today?
Can I talk? Yeah? Did you have no choice? Now?
Chris knows that you're on the phone. Hid. Yeah, okay,
you know it's really awkward to bringing a whole radio
(06:31):
show into this, but I guess you know, I have
been dodging the text and everything. Um So the actual
reason that I haven't responded anything, and the reason I
haven't really like, I really haven't known how taxually to
do this. I couldn't breathe throughout the entire date. And
(06:52):
that's not actually like a feeling thing, that's like a
medical thing. When I went in for the hug, there
was all the cat hair on your sweater and I'm
destly just completely allergic to cats, and so my entire
breathing system was locking up. Oh well, why didn't you
(07:15):
tell me that fair question? I was trying to do
the you know, gentlemanly thing and trying to, you know,
keep my wits about me, to keep the date going,
trying to be lively, trying to not you know, especially
because I didn't want to put it on you and
be like, you know, you're the cause of this or whatever.
I really tried to bottle all that up. At the
(07:36):
same time. It would have been very difficult for me
to articulate any of this just because I couldn't breathe.
So I was very smiling, nodding in anything else but
an awkward day, no wonder. Yeah, average, I'm sorry, she said.
Jessica told us that your dates seemed kind of average,
and from what Nina said right there, it would make sense,
(07:57):
right because he wasn't really talking. Yeah, everyone out for
drinks and for appetizers. There's there's a happy hour, and
I was trying to be as happy as possible while
also trying to you know, not faint. Okay, So that's
why you weren't really talkative like you are in tech,
because you could have breathed like, oh my god, I'm
(08:19):
so sorry. I feel like I almost still do. No.
I mean so right and honestly, and that's why I
was sharing the plates and everything. It's because I kind
of wanted to keep our mouths full, so I had
an excuse not to talk. Yeah, you know, when we
were texting, it never came up that you had a
cat otherwise I would have given you the heads up
(08:40):
that I am allergic. Yeah, but I don't have a cat.
My roommate has a cat, And if you had just
told me about your allergy, I would have made sure
I used one of those like hair removal things so
that I didn't show up with cat here on my shirt. Okay,
so I can blame your roommate, then that's totally fine
(09:01):
with it. You can, I'll claim yourself because you could
have taken any anti hystamine if you were experiencing such
severe allergies. I just wasn't expecting to come face to
face with like a cat. That that's not really something
that I schedule on my daily routine, and therefore an
antihistamine is not quite something that is just routine for me. Jessica,
(09:24):
was there at any point during the date, like, did
you notice that he couldn't talked? Did he look itchy
or like he couldn't breathe? He didn't look itchy, but
he definitely sounded like yet a stuff he knows, Like
I thought he might have a cold or was getting
sick that he just didn't tell me about. But apparently
he's been suffering from this cat allergy all week, which
is why he can't respond to my text messages. Is
(09:45):
that when I'm hearing Chris again, it's difficult because I
don't want to throw anybody out of the bus here,
except I guess a cat or two. I just didn't
want to text and say, hey, we should get together
again and kind of lead anybody on, especially if I was,
you know, saying that I had to continually contend with like,
(10:05):
oh man, I'm gonna have to put my face and
other cats. But every time I see her, I will say.
It's a teachable moment though, for everybody listening at this point,
and especially like as a woman, for a man to
be direct and honest about what he's experiencing, that's attractive,
Like that's hot. So maybe in the future, Chris, like
(10:26):
if you start being able not to breathe, you just
straight up say I got allergies. That's way more attracting.
Nothing more attractives, more attractors going to die gasping for air.
All right, Chris, Well, I'm glad you're finally sharing now.
Like I feel like I can like close this chapter
a bit, but like, honestly, I feel like you handled
(10:47):
it completely wrong and maybe you'll take this as a
lesson going forward and not ghost people when you're having
some kind of issue. I will take that to heart.
And Desica, I'm so sorry, and I guess listeners of
this radio show, I'm I'm so sorry and I what
I did was not the correct thing to do again,
(11:10):
going to be more direct from mon from now on.
I love that you're being direct and apologizing to Jessica,
but it's also hot when you don't apologize to people
you don't need to apologize to you you. Yeah, nobody's really
that mad. I'm not mad at you. You, Chris, I
could understandable. Again, it's that martyrdom. I'm just trying to
make sure that everybody in this situation feels great, except
(11:30):
for me, who is blushing and just totally read in
his office. But you know it's okay. I mean, I
guess I have to ask, no matter what, totally Chris,
would you like to go on another date with Jessica?
Will pay for it? You know that I would. I
have a lot to make up for here, and Jessica
is very, very sweet and I enjoy talking to her
(11:52):
when I can talk, So yeah, I'm not interested. I
really just wanted to know why you go through me
so they know okay. And that was direct The Jewel
Show on Demand
The Jebel Show on Demand First Day follow Up. Jessica
is on the phone today for a first date follow up,
and she's getting ghosted by a dude named Chris. Jessica,
thank you for coming on the show. Before you tell
us about your date, how long has it been since
you heard from Chris. It's a few days with no
response whatsoever, nothing at all. Okay, have you tried to
(00:23):
reach out to him? Oh? Yeah, I've been texting him
because I think it's super weird that we had a
date and then he just stopped texting after weeks of
texting all the time. Yeah, okay, did you guys meet
on an app and we're talking a bunch before you
went out? Yeah, we met on an app and then
we only had one date, which was you know, kind
of basic like happy hour, just some drinks and we
(00:44):
shared an appetizer, but then nothing since that date ended.
Did the date go well? Well? I mean I can't
say that I was like super into him, but nothing
went wrong in the date. Like, it's not that big
of a deal that he goes to me. Except hate
when people don't respond to text She's like, I don't
really like him, but it's the principle at this point.
(01:06):
So it's more just getting ghosted than anything I get
that I need. I want to have to keep thinking
about him. It's like there's no reason too. But there's
something psychologically about being ghosted that makes me like obsessed
over something that I barely even care about. Could that
have come up in the date? It's kind of a
red flag. I'm not sure. Maybe you could tell I
(01:28):
understand you, and I know I'm a walking red flag
at times, and so that's why I'm just asking. I
don't know. I just think it's really rude, Like if
we're old enough to go on a date, then we
should be old enough to say if we're not interested.
And I'm curious, is it me or did he just
not feel a connection or did he go on a
date with someone else? And like the more like all
of that's fine. I would just like to know what
(01:49):
the answer is. If he was still talking to you,
would you want to go out with him again? Or
is it just that you're getting ghosted and you can't
you can't stand not knowing why. It's sort of more
of the ladder, But I'm open. I didn't have a
strong feeling one way or the other on whether we
should go out again. So I'm open. I would just
kind of like to know why he stopped responding to
(02:09):
text messages. So if you think back to the date though,
to your like okay date, was there anything that was
like less okay then normal? Yeah, Normally people are like
I really liked them, and I don't know why they're
ghosting me. You're just like, I don't whatever with him.
I just don't want to be ghosted because if you're
feeling like it was whatever, maybe he thought it was
(02:30):
just whatever too, and so he's like why bother? Yeah,
I guess, but it takes two seconds to be like,
oh I just don't feel a connection or I'm not interested,
you know, like why would you not stop back? Like
I'm actually kind of worried because he was so responsive
before in the date, and he went off smitially on
the date, so I'm worried he might like be really sick. Actually,
are you feeling sick at all? I mean maybe you
(02:52):
know if you feel good, Yeah, I feel totally fine.
So if he did have something, I didn't catch it.
I mean he was really sniffily, like totally nose blocks
and everything. Do you think that he knew you weren't
that into it. Maybe. I mean, like I said, it's
the first date, so it's not like I'm going to
be like dushing over someone right away or like completely uninterested.
(03:13):
I kind of feel like you should give people a chance,
So I don't know. I don't think I gave off
weird signals. Did anything happen on your date that you
think could be a reason that he ghosted you. Yeah,
Like he hugged when we first got there, and it
was a nice hug, Like he came full on in
full body contact. He had, you know, no problem sharing food,
which I like because I think that's like a way
(03:34):
to connect if you're sharing a plate as opposed to
getting your own things. Yeah, like your average date, I
feel like I don't know, Juebill, how do you feel
about going on an average date? Would you want another
date after an average date? Not? Usually No, And I
would be fine getting ghosted because I'm like cool, I
don't have to talk to him again, you know. Yeah, Well,
(03:55):
clearly you're healthier I am. I wouldn't say that he's
been working on it for a while. Yeah, Well, okay,
we'll try to figure out for you what's the last
thing that he said to you? Hello? He said, this
was great, Then I'll talk to you soon. Like it
ended in a positive way that would make you think
that there's going to be communication afterwards. Okay, all right,
(04:16):
well we'll see if we can figure it out for you. Well,
play us on come back and then call him and
find out where you're getting ghosted next. Okay, all right, thanks,
all right. In the middle of today's first date follow
up and if you're just joining us, Jessica is on
the phone and she's getting ghosted by a guy named Chris.
She doesn't really care that much about Chris, but she
wants to know why he's ghosting or real quick, Jessica,
(04:37):
for anybody just joining us, give us a recap of
your situation. So I went on a date with christ
Things went fine. I'm not sure if I even want
a second date, but he stopped responding to text and
it's driving me crazy. So I have to find out why. Okay,
you know what she's doing it for all the people
that just are like, well why not, I'm bomb yeah
(04:57):
you know, yeah. I mean, if I'm going on a
date and there's ghosting involved, it better be from me. Okay, Yeah,
we're about to call him and try to figure out
why he's ghosting here. All right, Jessica, are you ready?
I'm so ready. Okay, here we go one Dalla's phone number. Yeah,
(05:23):
this is Chris. Hello, Chris, how are you? This is
Jewel from The Jewel Show. It's a radio show. Hi, Chris.
I'm Nina also on that show. That's Nina, and then
Victoria's over there. There's three people on the phone with
you right now. What's up, Chris? I'm so sorry? What
is going on? We do a segment on our show
and it's called the First Date follow Up. It's where
you go out on a date with somebody and then
you end up ghosting them. They asked if we can
(05:45):
get you on the phone and figure out what happened,
and we got an email about you from somebody that
you went on a date with recently. Yeah, okay, now
I know what this is about. Brilliant. Hi, Okay, so
you do know who we're talking about. So is there
somebody your ghosts in particular? Yeah? No, Recently I have
been receiving a lot of texts and I haven't been
replying to them, just honestly, because I haven't known how
(06:08):
to let me guess this is Jessica online. That a
good guess. I Hi, Jessica, how how are you doing today?
Can I talk? Yeah? Did you have no choice? Now?
Chris knows that you're on the phone. Hid. Yeah, okay,
you know it's really awkward to bringing a whole radio
(06:31):
show into this, but I guess you know, I have
been dodging the text and everything. Um So the actual
reason that I haven't responded anything, and the reason I
haven't really like, I really haven't known how taxually to
do this. I couldn't breathe throughout the entire date. And
(06:52):
that's not actually like a feeling thing, that's like a
medical thing. When I went in for the hug, there
was all the cat hair on your sweater and I'm
destly just completely allergic to cats, and so my entire
breathing system was locking up. Oh well, why didn't you
(07:15):
tell me that fair question? I was trying to do
the you know, gentlemanly thing and trying to, you know,
keep my wits about me, to keep the date going,
trying to be lively, trying to not you know, especially
because I didn't want to put it on you and
be like, you know, you're the cause of this or whatever.
I really tried to bottle all that up. At the
(07:36):
same time. It would have been very difficult for me
to articulate any of this just because I couldn't breathe.
So I was very smiling, nodding in anything else but
an awkward day, no wonder. Yeah, average, I'm sorry, she said.
Jessica told us that your dates seemed kind of average,
and from what Nina said right there, it would make sense,
(07:57):
right because he wasn't really talking. Yeah, everyone out for
drinks and for appetizers. There's there's a happy hour, and
I was trying to be as happy as possible while
also trying to you know, not faint. Okay, So that's
why you weren't really talkative like you are in tech,
because you could have breathed like, oh my god, I'm
(08:19):
so sorry. I feel like I almost still do. No.
I mean so right and honestly, and that's why I
was sharing the plates and everything. It's because I kind
of wanted to keep our mouths full, so I had
an excuse not to talk. Yeah, you know, when we
were texting, it never came up that you had a
cat otherwise I would have given you the heads up
(08:40):
that I am allergic. Yeah, but I don't have a cat.
My roommate has a cat, And if you had just
told me about your allergy, I would have made sure
I used one of those like hair removal things so
that I didn't show up with cat here on my shirt. Okay,
so I can blame your roommate, then that's totally fine
(09:01):
with it. You can, I'll claim yourself because you could
have taken any anti hystamine if you were experiencing such
severe allergies. I just wasn't expecting to come face to
face with like a cat. That that's not really something
that I schedule on my daily routine, and therefore an
antihistamine is not quite something that is just routine for me. Jessica,
(09:24):
was there at any point during the date, like, did
you notice that he couldn't talked? Did he look itchy
or like he couldn't breathe? He didn't look itchy, but
he definitely sounded like yet a stuff he knows, Like
I thought he might have a cold or was getting
sick that he just didn't tell me about. But apparently
he's been suffering from this cat allergy all week, which
is why he can't respond to my text messages. Is
(09:45):
that when I'm hearing Chris again, it's difficult because I
don't want to throw anybody out of the bus here,
except I guess a cat or two. I just didn't
want to text and say, hey, we should get together
again and kind of lead anybody on, especially if I was,
you know, saying that I had to continually contend with like,
(10:05):
oh man, I'm gonna have to put my face and
other cats. But every time I see her, I will say.
It's a teachable moment though, for everybody listening at this point,
and especially like as a woman, for a man to
be direct and honest about what he's experiencing, that's attractive,
Like that's hot. So maybe in the future, Chris, like
(10:26):
if you start being able not to breathe, you just
straight up say I got allergies. That's way more attracting.
Nothing more attractives, more attractors going to die gasping for air.
All right, Chris, Well, I'm glad you're finally sharing now.
Like I feel like I can like close this chapter
a bit, but like, honestly, I feel like you handled
(10:47):
it completely wrong and maybe you'll take this as a
lesson going forward and not ghost people when you're having
some kind of issue. I will take that to heart.
And Desica, I'm so sorry, and I guess listeners of
this radio show, I'm I'm so sorry and I what
I did was not the correct thing to do again,
(11:10):
going to be more direct from mon from now on.
I love that you're being direct and apologizing to Jessica,
but it's also hot when you don't apologize to people
you don't need to apologize to you you. Yeah, nobody's really
that mad. I'm not mad at you. You, Chris, I
could understandable. Again, it's that martyrdom. I'm just trying to
make sure that everybody in this situation feels great, except
(11:30):
for me, who is blushing and just totally read in
his office. But you know it's okay. I mean, I
guess I have to ask, no matter what, totally Chris,
would you like to go on another date with Jessica?
Will pay for it? You know that I would. I
have a lot to make up for here, and Jessica
is very, very sweet and I enjoy talking to her
(11:52):
when I can talk, So yeah, I'm not interested. I
really just wanted to know why you go through me
so they know okay. And that was direct The Jewel
Show on Demand
Host
Jubal Fresh
Popular Podcasts
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.
Therapy Gecko
An unlicensed lizard psychologist travels the universe talking to strangers about absolutely nothing. TO CALL THE GECKO: follow me on https://www.twitch.tv/lyleforever to get a notification for when I am taking calls. I am usually live Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays but lately a lot of other times too. I am a gecko.