June 17, 2025 • 39 mins
In this episode of Just Heal with Dr. Jay, actor Kareem Grimes joins Dr. Jay for a thoughtful conversation about purpose, presence, and perseverance. Kareem shares his journey through the highs and lows of the entertainment industry, reflecting on the role of preparation, repetition, and mindset in building a lasting career. He speaks candidly about facing rejection, leaning on faith, and the discipline required to stay the course. Together, they explore the connection between healing and purpose, reminding listeners that growth takes work—and that being present for the process is just as important as the outcome. Tune in and join the conversation in the socials below.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Just Heal with Doctor j a production of
The Black Effect Podcast Network and iHeartRadio. Welcome back to
another episode with Just Heal with Doctor Jay. Listen. I'm
excited about today's episode because I get to sit with
my good friend and my brother, Kareem Grimes. Some of
you have seen him on All America Listen if you
(00:20):
have it, seventh great season. I'm hoping eighth season is
renewed for my brother because he's a phenomenal actor. More importantly,
he's a phenomenal brother. And also you've seen him on
Grey's Anatomy and Ben Staples Show. Listen. The one thing
that I love about Kareem is that he has his range.
And most artists, because I call actors artists because they
(00:43):
are creating artistically with their gift of expression and bringing
these characters to life. But what I love about Kareem
is he has this full range of life that he's lived.
Is you guys don't know his age, but the brother
looks like he's in his twenties. But you know what
I mean, we ain't gonna talk about. But I don't
know what he's drinking, what type of water he's on.
(01:04):
I don't know if it's vampire blood, and maybe it's
just he's keeping his mind right and living good life
and minding his business. See you know the business plays
of a man, good good brother Man, Welcome to the
hill and community. Man, you be here, brother man, listen, bro, listen.
You know a lot of people are in television and
we'll get into you know how I normally engage in
(01:25):
the episode. But man, you look like you're getting younger. Man, Man,
God is good.
Speaker 2 (01:31):
Bro Like literally, you know, it's been a long journey
for me in this business. And you know when you
are aligned with your uh, you know, your gifts and
your passion. You know, it just does something to me. Man,
And I just feel like I've been renewed and just
(01:53):
being able to do what I love. Yeah, the outside
world doesn't get to me because I'm actually living my
my purpose.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
Man, I won't. That's a moment of pause. And if
you're new to just here with doctor J. I love
to take moment to pause because I love for things
to just rest on us because too many times we
hear somebody say something profound and we just ooh, are
But I like to just give it a moment of
(02:22):
silence and you said the outside world doesn't get to you.
Is that how you stabilize your mental health? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (02:32):
Man, And you know I'm not perfect. Of course, there's
some things that come. But I think when you strip
everything down to the bare bones of I got a
roof over my head in my right mind, my family's healthy.
I'm able to take a hot shower, and I'm able
(02:54):
to go to a refrigerator, open it and get something
to drink or something to eat. Once you push your
in that mindset, it's just like, all right, I'm good.
Perspective is perspective. It is perspective, man.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
And when when when you think about that perspective, is
that what gives you? Because you know, you're one of
the few brothers that I've connected with over the past
few years that every time I talk to you or
connect there's such this lightness to your voice. Is that
(03:29):
one of the reasons that you're able to have that
lightness is because your perspective is always in the right space.
Speaker 2 (03:35):
Absolutely, man, I've been I've been on the other side
of it. I've been, you know, working two and three
jobs and you know, trying to make ends meet, still
pursuing my career, not giving up even though you have
those pressures, and then once you're able to get out
of that, you know, and then being be in a
(03:58):
space where you have you wrote that dream, that goal
down and now you're living it. I just want to
be as present and living that as much as possible.
Speaker 1 (04:12):
Man. You know what's powerful, man is everybody today from
you are real and Kenyon had all spoke about being present.
And you don't hear men speak about being present because
as much as we will say that, you know, women
are always trying to control the future. I think there's
(04:34):
a part of us that are trying to control it
through performing. And what I'm hearing from you is that
we have to move from performing to just being present.
Speaker 2 (04:46):
We have to, man, because life can ultimately, you know,
like literally, if you're not careful, life can you know,
it can speed up for you if you're not present,
you know what I mean, because you're thinking about something
that's ahead and you're not dealing with what's right now
(05:08):
right I mean, and you know, just a lot of
things can happen. Man. So for me, I've learned through
life of just being present, man, of just being in
the moment, you know, And for me that's just helped
me so much in my life, man, And that's what
I try to do and you know, preach to other people.
Speaker 1 (05:28):
What led you to being present?
Speaker 2 (05:32):
Working three jobs, figuring out, oh man, this bill do this,
I gotta do this, I gotta do that, I gotta
do that, and it's just like bruh, it's gonna be there.
It's not going nowhere. So what are we going to
do right now? What are we dealing with right now?
You know, I have a niece and a nephew, now
you know what I mean, So making sure that I
(05:54):
spend quality time with them, you know, as much as possible,
and not just off out and about, because then you
missed those years moments, those moments of them growing up
and achieving things because you're not being present. You're thinking
about something that's going on next week that you got
to get to.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
So that's one thing that I found myself when I'm
hanging out with my nieces and nephews, man, that it
has helped me to be more present. Funny story, So
last night, I'm out to dinner. You know, I worked
in film all day and my phone died and I
couldn't get in touch with my producer and a friend
(06:34):
of mine. You know, it's like a lot of us
are out eating and they were like, Jay, it's okay.
And I was cool, but you know, I was like, man,
I gotta talk to CJ. I gotta get all this
stuff together, like I couldn't. And they were like, man,
just be in this moment. And bro, when I tell you,
I put the phone down on the table. And I
was cool because so many moments that we miss because
(07:03):
we're trying to be in the future rather than being
in the present moment. Because the reality, man, that's the
only thing that's real. And to be honest, man, that
phone being.
Speaker 2 (07:15):
Dead probably was the best thing for the rest of
that night.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
Oh when I got back home and when I got
back to the hotel and to put it on the charge,
I was mad because I'm like, dang, now I got
to turn back on the world, you know what I mean.
Now I got to turn back on to put our
fires and now I got to turn it back on
to see what's needed and that this person needs to email,
this person need this, and this person need that. Man.
So just to hear you speak about how being present
(07:44):
is important, and I think for those that are watching,
I want to make sure that we echo that present
actually is a presence of the presence. I mean it's
I mean the present is actually a gift at present
yeah for us. Yeah, to just rest in that. Man.
Speaker 2 (08:04):
Man, you know a lot of people, what I what
I tell people is that even right now, me sitting
here with you is a present because it's always good
to see. I know we're gonna have good conversation. But
just think, man, somebody didn't wake up today. Somebody didn't
(08:25):
wake up today at two o'clock on a Wednesday. You
know what I mean. So when you once again, once
you look at it and put it in perspective, you're like, man,
I gotta seize everything that's going on right now today.
Let me focus on today. Yeah, because what they say,
you know, tomorrow's not promised.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
No, it's not. That's it. Bro, Man, Bro, when I
tell you, I love your perspective. Man, It's it's so
cathartic to hear a man just be centered because most
of the time, brothers a word of the next and
and and not to discount their worries or their concerns.
(09:05):
They're very valid. But I also think that's part of
why many of us are aging fast?
Speaker 2 (09:12):
Yeah, man, Yeah, but once again it was a you know,
I had to learn these things through through trials in life, man,
you know what I mean. And you know, women in
my life and you know Mom and everybody.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
Is just like yo.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
You know, people just like yo. Just be present, be
present in the main focus, you know, with what my
career is, and being an actor is being present and
being in the moment, you know what I mean, and
having that repetition.
Speaker 1 (09:43):
You know.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
It then transferred to my life outside of the cameras.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
Yeah, are you are you big on repetition?
Speaker 2 (09:49):
Yeah, I'm old school. I bought my script with me.
I gotta I gotta self tape, I gotta do later on.
So I brought my work with me, you know what
I mean. So it's just I look at it and
it's just repetition for me. I'm very old school, you
know what I'm saying. Go to school and we had
to write, you you had to write the times, and
you know, Thursday you got definitions. Friday you gotta test.
(10:13):
So you writing them definitions over and over and over again.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:16):
That's stuck with me. That's got me where I'm at
this far. I ain't changing nothing.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
If it ain't fix it exactly. Because I think also
one of the things that I shared with with with
my mentees is like sometimes when I'm talking, it's just
like I said, no, when you hear it, you learn
it once, light it down, you learn it twice. Yes. Indeed,
like when I like when I get on the phone
with my mentors, They'll start talking and I'll be like,
(10:43):
hold on, hold on, Paul, and I'll start jotting down
what they're saying, because in that moment, I know, man,
I gotta get all that I can. You know, you're
the old schools get all you can and can all.
Speaker 2 (10:55):
You get absolutely absolutely so so.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
For me man writing things down. And I think for
me the football player, me loves repetitions because the more
you do something to get you build that repetitive nature.
It comes second nature. Absolutely, get you get exactly get
those reps in. So yeah, and I think from you know,
(11:20):
from football man, just like being consistent, and I know,
being in a space and in a industry where there's rejection,
there's a lot of sort of ups and down, peaks
and valleys, and it's really like an emotional roller coaster.
(11:40):
It is. When you talk about the getting your reps
in what exercises do you do mentally bro to balance that, man,
because that's got to be a weight at times. I mean,
you're phenomenal because I go back and watch Grays and
Native you know, on the episodes, and you're phenomenal on
all Americans. And I'm look at the roles you got,
(12:02):
But what about the roles that you wanted it? You
didn't get that you knew, you showed up and gave
it your best.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
Sure, man, I think a lot of it is, you know,
at an early age, me starting in the business in
the eighties taught me a lot of how to build
tough skin, thick skin with rejection at an early age.
And then as I've progressed through this business, and then
(12:30):
you know, studying. You know, my acting teachers have always said,
you know, prepare as much as you can and just
do the work.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (12:41):
If you just do the work and you go in
there and leave no stone unturned, you know, you can
look yourself in the mirror and say, hey, I did
my best.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
Now, if you come up in there unprepared and you
just lacks a daisical. You know what I mean. Then
you know, of course you may have some You may
second guess yourself. You didn't go in there with your
with your choice already, you know what I mean. So
the mental reps is preparation, you know what I'm saying.
(13:12):
Waking up each and every day, writing in my journal,
looking in the mirror, affirmations, you know what I'm saying.
Being presidents saying hey man, I woke up today. I
got feelings in my leg my toes, my hands, I
can see, I can smell, I can hear. Okay, everything
else is a cherry on top. Let me go out
to this day and be better than I was yesterday.
Speaker 1 (13:34):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
That's the mental Those are the mental reps, literally talking
to yourself telling yourself, hey man, you got this. Yesterday
is over, this is a new day. What we're gonna
do today that we didn't do yesterday, that's gonna be
us better.
Speaker 1 (13:48):
Right. So, in some way, as much as you're preparing
for success and preparing to succeed what you say, you're
also preparing ful failure.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
Yeah, yeah, you you know. You go in it with
optimism and saying, hey, I'm gonna do my best. If
it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out. It wasn't
for me, This wasn't the time, you know. So of
course you always have that in the back of your mind,
but you have more of the positive than the negative.
(14:23):
You know what I mean. I'm not gonna I'm not
gonna take myself out the game before I get in
the game, right, you know what I'm saying. I'm gonna
let I'm gonna let myself prepare as much as I
can and say, hey, man, just go in there and
do your best. You know what I mean. If it
doesn't work out, it doesn't work out, but you know
that you prepared. You went in there, kicked ass, took names,
and left.
Speaker 1 (14:43):
Yeah. And the reason I ask it because you have
viewers watching and they will say, doctor Jay krreem, that's good.
But what happens when all I know is prepared to succeed.
And what I would say is that if you're preparing
(15:06):
to succeed, you are preparing for failure because failure is
part of success. It is. And I think that's one
of the things that I see that really challenge a
lot of individuals in them mental health is because I
prepare to succeed and it didn't work out the way
that I thought it would work out. And I love
(15:28):
to push them to say, what if the preparation that
you were doing was helping you to fail well in
order to succeed later, Because that's also a part of
getting those mental reps in. Because you know, as an
athlete or whatever raalm or businesses you're in and whatever
(15:51):
ram is you operate in life, I think there has
to be an element where you're not It's almost like
you're not playing to lose, but you understand lose it as.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Part of it absolutely, man, And I think you know,
for me, it's just like, let me get to failing fast.
Let me fail fast. I give it to me right now,
so now I know what not to do the next time.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
And for me, that's just what it's like. The man,
there was a show called The Shield. I auditioned seventeen times.
Seventeen times.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Brother.
Speaker 2 (16:29):
In between those seventeen times, I will book, they will
write the character oute, oh we're going a different route,
We're not doing this anymore, seventeen times now. After the
second or third one, the average person would have been like, man,
don't even call me no more. But my agent gave
me a nugget. He said, listen, if they're calling you,
(16:50):
if they keep bringing you back, that means they want you.
They want you to succeed, They want to put you
on the show for something. He said, be concerned. When
the phone stops ringing, I was just like, now, okay,
but here's my pushback. Here's my pushback as a therapist.
(17:10):
That don't sound good. Yeah, if I'm getting called back
seventeen times? So how what?
Speaker 1 (17:16):
What? What was your process to process that nugget? Because
that sounds good in theory.
Speaker 2 (17:24):
Yeah, it does, it does, man?
Speaker 1 (17:25):
How did you process that to keep going back? Because okay,
let's say you went back the second time, you went
the third time, and by this time you look up,
you're like, damn bro yes' the eight time? Yeah, damn man.
Speaker 2 (17:36):
I think it was just more of a my faith
had to come in, and my faith had to be
so strong.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
And when did your faith come in either the nineteen eleven?
Speaker 2 (17:48):
What you talking about after the third But that's all
I'm agin you three and then after that I'll be like, lord, okay,
all right, what's going on?
Speaker 1 (17:58):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (17:59):
And for me, it was just like having to revert
back to when I play organized sports. There's a bad play,
let it go, get ready for the next play, you
know what I mean. So that's what I had to
do with auditions. You do it and you let go
of it. You don't hold on to it, you don't
take it with you, and you just keep it pushing,
(18:21):
you know what I mean. And once again you just
prepare as much as you can, you.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
Know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
And you know, like I said, with with the preparation
and going in, of course, there's the losing part of it,
you know what I mean. So once you don't hear back,
you're like, okay, so what can I learn from this?
Speaker 1 (18:44):
And I think, and that's what I was going to
ask you, what did you learn? What did you learn
about yourself? Other resilience?
Speaker 2 (18:53):
Uh not taking no for an answer, Oh uh yeah,
like literally resilience.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
Man. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
You know when I tell people that, they be like, man, listen,
probably after the second one, I just be like, don't
even you know, if they call me back, I don't
even want to go in, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (19:15):
So that's a lot to digest, it is, man, You
know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (19:19):
But once again, the blessing, you know, it may take
a while to get there, but the end result, the
blessing is that I end up doing three seasons on it.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
You know, so just think if I would have said, man,
I'm cool on the seventeenth one seasons.
Speaker 1 (19:40):
I just want to let that sit for a while
because there's somebody that is watching that has tried therapy.
I hear that a lot. Doc I tried it, it
doesn't work, and I have to challenge you to try
again and to not allow one experience to determine other
(20:04):
experiences or future experiences. That if somebody says, man, I've
tried that before, it doesn't work, and now I don't
want to and I want you guys to hear me
with your heart. I don't want to invalidate what you
feel about trying, because there is a way to keep trying.
Because even to say that I'm resilient at times, it's
(20:27):
also a weight because it's like why do I keep
getting back up? You know what I'm saying, like why
do I keep fighting? Why do I keep doing this thing?
And I would say this to add add to what
I'm saying, is that when you are committed to an
outcome that's conducive to the future and to the version
(20:53):
of yourself that you want, you would have went back
twenty times. Man, come on, bro, I can leave right now.
That's powerful, that's powerful.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
Yes, you do it because you know if you keep
knocking them down, all you need is at one. Yes,
all you need is at one open door. You know
what I mean, and knowing and having that mental to say, listen,
no matter what, this is the outcome. This is the goal.
(21:28):
To be on television, to be on a hit TV show,
you know what I'm saying, To be able to be
on set, to do what I love. That's why I came.
That's why I went back.
Speaker 1 (21:37):
Seventeen times because I love it.
Speaker 2 (21:40):
I love it.
Speaker 1 (21:41):
I love what I do.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
I love it. It's not work to me. Wow, that's
my passion.
Speaker 1 (21:50):
Now.
Speaker 2 (21:50):
Once you find your passion, you'll never work a day
in your life. So I'm not working. I'm having fun. Man,
and I get paid to dress up and they feed me.
Speaker 1 (22:01):
Come on, brouh. Come on, what job you know that's
gonna get you clothes, feed you and pay you. Ye'ah?
Come on.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
So that's that's why you asked me earlier. Man, it's
such a light brocause.
Speaker 1 (22:20):
I didn't been through the shit I dodnet been through it.
I know what it feels like.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
I know what it feels like to go to a
job that you don't want to go to, and in
between that, you got an audition that you gotta go
to mentally prepared for that, then go right back to
a job that.
Speaker 1 (22:37):
You don't want to be at.
Speaker 2 (22:39):
So now you gotta change your mental from I gotta
be ready for this, and once that's over, I gotta
switch my mind back to that.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:48):
And then once you make it, once you make it
to where you've been writing your goals and praying God,
And this is where why I got to be angry.
I have no reason to be in a negative mindset
because I'm doing what I love, because I pray for
this and I wrote it down as a goal and
(23:11):
I'm doing it. So why do I need the outside
world to make me in a negative way Because I'm
doing what I love? This is what you blood, sweat
and tears. Work hard, ten thirteen hour days driving Lyft,
driving uber, working this job, working that job, going to
all thishes this and now you're here, man, please, you
(23:32):
can't knock me off my square because I have been
through it.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
Man, Bro, I'd have been through it.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
So once you get to that that goal, that that
that thing that you want so bad, You're gonna appreciate
it more. You're gonna appreciate it more. You're gonna treat
it right because you know what the other side looked like.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
And you know what it took to get there.
Speaker 2 (23:55):
And you know what it took to get there.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Bro. When I tell you, you just helped so many people.
I'm here in the size, even in the room as
we sitting here, you helping people because this role to
self discovery, this journey to living the life that we
desire in whatever way and whatever capacity, it requires much
(24:20):
from us. And let me tell you this, what it
requires would never be fair. Never it ain't, would never
be fair. So we have to remove our mind. And
this is helping somebody to be because some of you,
your mind is blocking you from getting to the other side.
And you'll call it a mental health issue, but what
(24:41):
it is is just a mental challenge. Let's see here.
You just have to do the work. Because brother, I'm
sitting here thinking that seventeen auditions for three seasons, yep.
And some of you won't give up one year, for
ten years or for the rest of your life. Come on, bro,
some of you won't give up two years, three years.
(25:01):
You won't do the therapi. It's like I tell people,
I said, and they said, well, if you would go
if you could go back and do it again in
therapy and to seeing where you are, I said, Man,
I would do it all over again, because those five
years I was in therapy has now put me in
the position to where I free people now you know
(25:22):
what I mean, Where I'm able to really take my
life and to allow it to be an example and
an instrument for God to use. And I'm just sitting
here thinking seventeen auditions and you got three seasons out
and it started with just the first one. It started
(25:43):
with the first one, bro. And if you never made
it through the first one, you would have never knew
that you would have three season.
Speaker 2 (25:49):
Wait on, you probably wouldn't be on this couch talking.
Speaker 1 (25:52):
Br And how did that opportunity kareem open up? What
did that opportunity from bashield do?
Speaker 2 (25:59):
I met? I met my boy Jamie Turner, who at
that point was a story editor and then fast forward,
he's now the coach showrunner on All Americas.
Speaker 1 (26:16):
Wow, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
So God had a plan, you know what I mean.
It was just you're gonna stick to this plan. You know,
there's gonna be some obstacles, but what you're gonna do.
You're gonna give up, You're gonna stop, or you're gonna
keep pushing through. And you know, by me knowing him,
not even just All American, Like, he's got me a
(26:45):
job on another show that I was. You know, I
was think on my second interview for FedEx and I
was working another job, and he was like, man, I
got some I got something for.
Speaker 1 (26:58):
You, you know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (27:01):
Because he knows that I'm gonna show up right on time.
I'm gonna do the work, you know what I'm saying,
and I'm gonna treat everybody with respect. Yeah, And that
has led to you know, me being on this show
for seven seasons when the character was only supposed to
(27:22):
do two episodes. It's those things of just you know,
showing up, man, and just doing the work. Gotta do
the work.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
I want to back up, because you said the character
was only supposed to have two episodes.
Speaker 2 (27:44):
Yeah, that character was only supposed to do two episodes. Man,
I get shot in the season finale. But the showrunner,
the showrunner who I met ten years prior.
Speaker 1 (28:00):
I did her.
Speaker 2 (28:01):
I did an episode her first script for TV, which
is Buons, and that's how I met her. And on
that show probably probably the most money I made as
a guest star, because they kept pushing production back because
people kept getting sick. But that's how I got to
know and Ketch who's.
Speaker 1 (28:23):
The showrunner of All American.
Speaker 2 (28:25):
So I mean Jamie ten years, I mean NK eleven
and then fast forward they're both on this show.
Speaker 1 (28:33):
Wow, and you get on All American Homy seven seeds,
seven seasons from one decision, one decision yep, to keep
going back to.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
A seventeen audition seventeen times audition.
Speaker 1 (28:49):
If that is not healing enough for somebody to keep
doing it again, doc is not working for you, don't
hear me keep doing it again? Well, they said no,
they said, you know I needed this key doing it again.
(29:13):
And I think we said in the previous previous sessions
that healing is not linear. It's not that thing is
probably one of the most difficult tasks that you're ever
going to do, because you're going to have to rip
some band aids off, You're going to have to take
some masks off then, and you're going to have to
(29:37):
take off the clothes that you have been wearing. And
I'm meaning the clothes are the labels that you've attached
to yourself from the experiences that you've had, because you
have a traumatic experience, and now the traumatic experience become
how you identify yourself because you go, my name is
such and such, and this happened, and this happened. This
(30:01):
is why I dot that that that's a piece of
clothing that you are attaching to yourself and this is
not invalidate from your experience. But I believe in this
moment you can take what Kareem is sharing, and this
moment is to keep doing it again and doing it again,
meaning that you may have to do something different when
(30:24):
you do it again.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
Yeah, it's like it's like it's sometimes you have to
revert back to when you were a kid and you
have the opportunity to be outside and play, ride your bike, skateboard,
whatever it is, and you scrape your knee and your elbow.
Speaker 1 (30:43):
You didn't stop, you either, went.
Speaker 2 (30:47):
To a water hole, put some cold water on that
thing that nerd out, and he was like, all right,
I'm ready to go back.
Speaker 1 (30:54):
Go in the house.
Speaker 2 (30:55):
Hey, your mama put that green alcohol on your barn
that wound, burn the hell out, burn and then put
that put that band aid and then send you right
back on out there. You didn't stay in. We went
right back out there. So you're everybody is capable of
doing it. You're capable of doing because you did it
when you were a child.
Speaker 1 (31:15):
So what you saying, Karns, We're all capable of healing.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
Absolutely, We've done it time and time again. When you
had the chicken pox, did you just stop and just
be like, oh, it's over. You put that pink lotion on,
laid in that bed, ain't that soup and crackers washing them,
wash some stories with your grandmother or whatever, you know
(31:38):
what I mean. And then once some bumps went away,
you was outside.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
He was ready to go.
Speaker 2 (31:43):
Yah, that tooth came out, Take that thing out, put
in your pillow, have some money.
Speaker 1 (31:49):
You went to school the next day. That tooth grew back.
Speaker 2 (31:55):
So that lets you know, we can heal ourselves. We
just got to do the work.
Speaker 1 (32:00):
Mm hmm. Yeah, I'll just let this baronet. We can
heal ourselves, but you got to do the work. This this,
this last question I want to ask as as I
asked every guest. Uh. And it is really the staple
of this show and what it represents. What does healing
(32:23):
means to Kareem? Shdding something shadding, shedding something old that
you know was.
Speaker 2 (32:44):
Holding me back or whatever it is, and seeing something
grow new, you know, looking at it from a different perspective. Yeah,
shedding something old and letting the new growth, the new
(33:07):
growth come in.
Speaker 1 (33:09):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (33:10):
Oh, you know we are we are powerful beings.
Speaker 1 (33:18):
You know.
Speaker 2 (33:20):
The tongue is life and death. Yeah, so what you're
gonna do with it? You can continue to feed and
say negative things and that continues the snowball and your
life continues to look the same way. Or you can
self check yourself each and every day. Thoughts become things,
(33:44):
Thoughts become things. All right, let me check myself. Let
me go into a mental space of thinking of something positive.
What brings me joy, what brings me happiness, what puts
a smile on my face? Let me start with that
little thing thing right there. Then let's go to the next.
You know, I think everybody has the power to write
(34:09):
your own ticket to happiness. You do, you put a
song on your favorite song, you get the smiling, you
get the dancing it's off of a song, or you
pull a picture up or pair of shoes or clothing
and you're like, oh, man, okay, it's in the good
(34:31):
it's right, I'm ready to go. So we have the
power to do it. You just got to go forth
and do it. It's gonna be a little uncomfortable, but
you got to do it. And you're worth it. You're
worth it, man, You're worth it. Everybody is here for
(34:52):
a purpose or reason. Don't don't let that die out, man,
because you're here for a reason. God, don't make no mistakes,
no period.
Speaker 1 (35:08):
Man. I'm just I'm just basking this in man, because
that you're worth it. Part It stands out to me
and everything that you're saying that we're worth taking the risks,
We're worth taking the journey. And this podcast speaks to
both men and women, but for the men that are watching,
(35:30):
and this is just a message to you, and I
want Kareem to look at this camera and talk to
you as we close this out. And I'm just telling
you that, brother, you're more than worth hit man, You're
deserving of it. Kareem can I and I just feel
this in this moment, man, because I'm sure you know,
individuals look at your character and look at what you've
(35:53):
been able to do your body of work and acting.
But in this moment, I just if you could, let's
just take an opportunity and just talk to a brother
or a sister that made it struggling to make the
decision to do it again, hood, if you could just
speak to them.
Speaker 2 (36:12):
Yeah, I'll break it down simple. Out of a billion, spired,
you made it. You're the one that made it to
the aid and you are here out of a billion.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
You special.
Speaker 2 (36:31):
You are special. You are here for a reason. You
have a purpose and all you have to do is
do that work to find out what that purpose is.
But you're here for a reason, you know, and from
that point on, you know, like I said, you have
(36:53):
the ability to write your own ticket to happiness.
Speaker 1 (36:56):
You gotta do the work. Brother, What a way to
close it out. You have your own ticket to write
to happenings. But you gotta do the world. Brother, It's
always it's rich when we talk because we go deep
and we have these these cathartic conversations man, that that
(37:21):
are encouraging to me and then their life and enriching
for the soul. And so Man, I speak blessings over you. Man,
I'm praying that you get another season with all Americas,
and praying that all of your endeavors, your auditions, all
of the things that you're putting your hands to, that
God not only breathes on it, that he blesses it
(37:43):
and allow it to expand, and that He keep expanding
your territories in giving you years of youth. Man, because
like I said, brother, I don't know what you I
know your real age, but at none of their business
what your age is. But my good brother here is
thriving in an aging backwards. And as we're closing out
to my brothers that are watching, man, brothers, take care
(38:04):
of yourself. Go to the doctor. Stop ignoring the chest pain,
stop ignoring the leg pain. We need to age better
so we can get to the place where we're pouring
wisdom back into this world. And I love that you
do that, man, on your platform, and then you do
(38:25):
that through your work. Brother. So man, thank you for
joining me. Today man on this healing community. Man as
always good seeing you Man. Listen. You can listen to
Just Here with Doctor J audibly on the Black Effect Podcast,
iHeart Podcast or anywhere else that you listen to podcasts.
Don't just pop in and listen to what's happening over
(38:46):
here in the healing community. I want you to subscribe
and join Just Heal with Doctor J YouTube family, and
over here we're healing and we're doing some great things.
And I'm just excited about what we're doing here, and
I'm excited that you get to listen to conversations that's
going to encourage you to continue to growing, encourage you
(39:09):
to continue expanding in life. And until next time, remember
healing is a journey and wholeness is the destination. Just
Here with Doctor J a production of the Black Effect
podcast Network. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
(39:32):
And you can follow me at King J. Barnett on
Instagram and x and follow us on YouTube. Just Heal
Doctor J
Welcome to Just Heal with Doctor j a production of
The Black Effect Podcast Network and iHeartRadio. Welcome back to
another episode with Just Heal with Doctor Jay. Listen. I'm
excited about today's episode because I get to sit with
my good friend and my brother, Kareem Grimes. Some of
you have seen him on All America Listen if you
(00:20):
have it, seventh great season. I'm hoping eighth season is
renewed for my brother because he's a phenomenal actor. More importantly,
he's a phenomenal brother. And also you've seen him on
Grey's Anatomy and Ben Staples Show. Listen. The one thing
that I love about Kareem is that he has his range.
And most artists, because I call actors artists because they
(00:43):
are creating artistically with their gift of expression and bringing
these characters to life. But what I love about Kareem
is he has this full range of life that he's lived.
Is you guys don't know his age, but the brother
looks like he's in his twenties. But you know what
I mean, we ain't gonna talk about. But I don't
know what he's drinking, what type of water he's on.
(01:04):
I don't know if it's vampire blood, and maybe it's
just he's keeping his mind right and living good life
and minding his business. See you know the business plays
of a man, good good brother Man, Welcome to the
hill and community. Man, you be here, brother man, listen, bro, listen.
You know a lot of people are in television and
we'll get into you know how I normally engage in
(01:25):
the episode. But man, you look like you're getting younger. Man, Man,
God is good.
Speaker 2 (01:31):
Bro Like literally, you know, it's been a long journey
for me in this business. And you know when you
are aligned with your uh, you know, your gifts and
your passion. You know, it just does something to me. Man,
And I just feel like I've been renewed and just
(01:53):
being able to do what I love. Yeah, the outside
world doesn't get to me because I'm actually living my
my purpose.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
Man, I won't. That's a moment of pause. And if
you're new to just here with doctor J. I love
to take moment to pause because I love for things
to just rest on us because too many times we
hear somebody say something profound and we just ooh, are
But I like to just give it a moment of
(02:22):
silence and you said the outside world doesn't get to you.
Is that how you stabilize your mental health? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (02:32):
Man, And you know I'm not perfect. Of course, there's
some things that come. But I think when you strip
everything down to the bare bones of I got a
roof over my head in my right mind, my family's healthy.
I'm able to take a hot shower, and I'm able
(02:54):
to go to a refrigerator, open it and get something
to drink or something to eat. Once you push your
in that mindset, it's just like, all right, I'm good.
Perspective is perspective. It is perspective, man.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
And when when when you think about that perspective, is
that what gives you? Because you know, you're one of
the few brothers that I've connected with over the past
few years that every time I talk to you or
connect there's such this lightness to your voice. Is that
(03:29):
one of the reasons that you're able to have that
lightness is because your perspective is always in the right space.
Speaker 2 (03:35):
Absolutely, man, I've been I've been on the other side
of it. I've been, you know, working two and three
jobs and you know, trying to make ends meet, still
pursuing my career, not giving up even though you have
those pressures, and then once you're able to get out
of that, you know, and then being be in a
(03:58):
space where you have you wrote that dream, that goal
down and now you're living it. I just want to
be as present and living that as much as possible.
Speaker 1 (04:12):
Man. You know what's powerful, man is everybody today from
you are real and Kenyon had all spoke about being present.
And you don't hear men speak about being present because
as much as we will say that, you know, women
are always trying to control the future. I think there's
(04:34):
a part of us that are trying to control it
through performing. And what I'm hearing from you is that
we have to move from performing to just being present.
Speaker 2 (04:46):
We have to, man, because life can ultimately, you know,
like literally, if you're not careful, life can you know,
it can speed up for you if you're not present,
you know what I mean, because you're thinking about something
that's ahead and you're not dealing with what's right now
(05:08):
right I mean, and you know, just a lot of
things can happen. Man. So for me, I've learned through
life of just being present, man, of just being in
the moment, you know, And for me that's just helped
me so much in my life, man, And that's what
I try to do and you know, preach to other people.
Speaker 1 (05:28):
What led you to being present?
Speaker 2 (05:32):
Working three jobs, figuring out, oh man, this bill do this,
I gotta do this, I gotta do that, I gotta
do that, and it's just like bruh, it's gonna be there.
It's not going nowhere. So what are we going to
do right now? What are we dealing with right now?
You know, I have a niece and a nephew, now
you know what I mean, So making sure that I
(05:54):
spend quality time with them, you know, as much as possible,
and not just off out and about, because then you
missed those years moments, those moments of them growing up
and achieving things because you're not being present. You're thinking
about something that's going on next week that you got
to get to.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
So that's one thing that I found myself when I'm
hanging out with my nieces and nephews, man, that it
has helped me to be more present. Funny story, So
last night, I'm out to dinner. You know, I worked
in film all day and my phone died and I
couldn't get in touch with my producer and a friend
(06:34):
of mine. You know, it's like a lot of us
are out eating and they were like, Jay, it's okay.
And I was cool, but you know, I was like, man,
I gotta talk to CJ. I gotta get all this
stuff together, like I couldn't. And they were like, man,
just be in this moment. And bro, when I tell you,
I put the phone down on the table. And I
was cool because so many moments that we miss because
(07:03):
we're trying to be in the future rather than being
in the present moment. Because the reality, man, that's the
only thing that's real. And to be honest, man, that
phone being.
Speaker 2 (07:15):
Dead probably was the best thing for the rest of
that night.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
Oh when I got back home and when I got
back to the hotel and to put it on the charge,
I was mad because I'm like, dang, now I got
to turn back on the world, you know what I mean.
Now I got to turn back on to put our
fires and now I got to turn it back on
to see what's needed and that this person needs to email,
this person need this, and this person need that. Man.
So just to hear you speak about how being present
(07:44):
is important, and I think for those that are watching,
I want to make sure that we echo that present
actually is a presence of the presence. I mean it's
I mean the present is actually a gift at present
yeah for us. Yeah, to just rest in that. Man.
Speaker 2 (08:04):
Man, you know a lot of people, what I what
I tell people is that even right now, me sitting
here with you is a present because it's always good
to see. I know we're gonna have good conversation. But
just think, man, somebody didn't wake up today. Somebody didn't
(08:25):
wake up today at two o'clock on a Wednesday. You
know what I mean. So when you once again, once
you look at it and put it in perspective, you're like, man,
I gotta seize everything that's going on right now today.
Let me focus on today. Yeah, because what they say,
you know, tomorrow's not promised.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
No, it's not. That's it. Bro, Man, Bro, when I
tell you, I love your perspective. Man, It's it's so
cathartic to hear a man just be centered because most
of the time, brothers a word of the next and
and and not to discount their worries or their concerns.
(09:05):
They're very valid. But I also think that's part of
why many of us are aging fast?
Speaker 2 (09:12):
Yeah, man, Yeah, but once again it was a you know,
I had to learn these things through through trials in life, man,
you know what I mean. And you know, women in
my life and you know Mom and everybody.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
Is just like yo.
Speaker 2 (09:27):
You know, people just like yo. Just be present, be
present in the main focus, you know, with what my
career is, and being an actor is being present and
being in the moment, you know what I mean, and
having that repetition.
Speaker 1 (09:43):
You know.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
It then transferred to my life outside of the cameras.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
Yeah, are you are you big on repetition?
Speaker 2 (09:49):
Yeah, I'm old school. I bought my script with me.
I gotta I gotta self tape, I gotta do later on.
So I brought my work with me, you know what
I mean. So it's just I look at it and
it's just repetition for me. I'm very old school, you
know what I'm saying. Go to school and we had
to write, you you had to write the times, and
you know, Thursday you got definitions. Friday you gotta test.
(10:13):
So you writing them definitions over and over and over again.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:16):
That's stuck with me. That's got me where I'm at
this far. I ain't changing nothing.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
If it ain't fix it exactly. Because I think also
one of the things that I shared with with with
my mentees is like sometimes when I'm talking, it's just
like I said, no, when you hear it, you learn
it once, light it down, you learn it twice. Yes. Indeed,
like when I like when I get on the phone
with my mentors, They'll start talking and I'll be like,
(10:43):
hold on, hold on, Paul, and I'll start jotting down
what they're saying, because in that moment, I know, man,
I gotta get all that I can. You know, you're
the old schools get all you can and can all.
Speaker 2 (10:55):
You get absolutely absolutely so so.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
For me man writing things down. And I think for
me the football player, me loves repetitions because the more
you do something to get you build that repetitive nature.
It comes second nature. Absolutely, get you get exactly get
those reps in. So yeah, and I think from you know,
(11:20):
from football man, just like being consistent, and I know,
being in a space and in a industry where there's rejection,
there's a lot of sort of ups and down, peaks
and valleys, and it's really like an emotional roller coaster.
(11:40):
It is. When you talk about the getting your reps
in what exercises do you do mentally bro to balance that, man,
because that's got to be a weight at times. I mean,
you're phenomenal because I go back and watch Grays and
Native you know, on the episodes, and you're phenomenal on
all Americans. And I'm look at the roles you got,
(12:02):
But what about the roles that you wanted it? You
didn't get that you knew, you showed up and gave
it your best.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
Sure, man, I think a lot of it is, you know,
at an early age, me starting in the business in
the eighties taught me a lot of how to build
tough skin, thick skin with rejection at an early age.
And then as I've progressed through this business, and then
(12:30):
you know, studying. You know, my acting teachers have always said,
you know, prepare as much as you can and just
do the work.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (12:41):
If you just do the work and you go in
there and leave no stone unturned, you know, you can
look yourself in the mirror and say, hey, I did
my best.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
Now, if you come up in there unprepared and you
just lacks a daisical. You know what I mean. Then
you know, of course you may have some You may
second guess yourself. You didn't go in there with your
with your choice already, you know what I mean. So
the mental reps is preparation, you know what I'm saying.
(13:12):
Waking up each and every day, writing in my journal,
looking in the mirror, affirmations, you know what I'm saying.
Being presidents saying hey man, I woke up today. I
got feelings in my leg my toes, my hands, I
can see, I can smell, I can hear. Okay, everything
else is a cherry on top. Let me go out
to this day and be better than I was yesterday.
Speaker 1 (13:34):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
That's the mental Those are the mental reps, literally talking
to yourself telling yourself, hey man, you got this. Yesterday
is over, this is a new day. What we're gonna
do today that we didn't do yesterday, that's gonna be
us better.
Speaker 1 (13:48):
Right. So, in some way, as much as you're preparing
for success and preparing to succeed what you say, you're
also preparing ful failure.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
Yeah, yeah, you you know. You go in it with
optimism and saying, hey, I'm gonna do my best. If
it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out. It wasn't
for me, This wasn't the time, you know. So of
course you always have that in the back of your mind,
but you have more of the positive than the negative.
(14:23):
You know what I mean. I'm not gonna I'm not
gonna take myself out the game before I get in
the game, right, you know what I'm saying. I'm gonna
let I'm gonna let myself prepare as much as I
can and say, hey, man, just go in there and
do your best. You know what I mean. If it
doesn't work out, it doesn't work out, but you know
that you prepared. You went in there, kicked ass, took names,
and left.
Speaker 1 (14:43):
Yeah. And the reason I ask it because you have
viewers watching and they will say, doctor Jay krreem, that's good.
But what happens when all I know is prepared to succeed.
And what I would say is that if you're preparing
(15:06):
to succeed, you are preparing for failure because failure is
part of success. It is. And I think that's one
of the things that I see that really challenge a
lot of individuals in them mental health is because I
prepare to succeed and it didn't work out the way
that I thought it would work out. And I love
(15:28):
to push them to say, what if the preparation that
you were doing was helping you to fail well in
order to succeed later, Because that's also a part of
getting those mental reps in. Because you know, as an
athlete or whatever raalm or businesses you're in and whatever
(15:51):
ram is you operate in life, I think there has
to be an element where you're not It's almost like
you're not playing to lose, but you understand lose it as.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Part of it absolutely, man, And I think you know,
for me, it's just like, let me get to failing fast.
Let me fail fast. I give it to me right now,
so now I know what not to do the next time.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (16:16):
And for me, that's just what it's like. The man,
there was a show called The Shield. I auditioned seventeen times.
Seventeen times.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Brother.
Speaker 2 (16:29):
In between those seventeen times, I will book, they will
write the character oute, oh we're going a different route,
We're not doing this anymore, seventeen times now. After the
second or third one, the average person would have been like, man,
don't even call me no more. But my agent gave
me a nugget. He said, listen, if they're calling you,
(16:50):
if they keep bringing you back, that means they want you.
They want you to succeed, They want to put you
on the show for something. He said, be concerned. When
the phone stops ringing, I was just like, now, okay,
but here's my pushback. Here's my pushback as a therapist.
(17:10):
That don't sound good. Yeah, if I'm getting called back
seventeen times? So how what?
Speaker 1 (17:16):
What? What was your process to process that nugget? Because
that sounds good in theory.
Speaker 2 (17:24):
Yeah, it does, it does, man?
Speaker 1 (17:25):
How did you process that to keep going back? Because okay,
let's say you went back the second time, you went
the third time, and by this time you look up,
you're like, damn bro yes' the eight time? Yeah, damn man.
Speaker 2 (17:36):
I think it was just more of a my faith
had to come in, and my faith had to be
so strong.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
And when did your faith come in either the nineteen eleven?
Speaker 2 (17:48):
What you talking about after the third But that's all
I'm agin you three and then after that I'll be like, lord, okay,
all right, what's going on?
Speaker 1 (17:58):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (17:59):
And for me, it was just like having to revert
back to when I play organized sports. There's a bad play,
let it go, get ready for the next play, you
know what I mean. So that's what I had to
do with auditions. You do it and you let go
of it. You don't hold on to it, you don't
take it with you, and you just keep it pushing,
(18:21):
you know what I mean. And once again you just
prepare as much as you can, you.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
Know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
And you know, like I said, with with the preparation
and going in, of course, there's the losing part of it,
you know what I mean. So once you don't hear back,
you're like, okay, so what can I learn from this?
Speaker 1 (18:44):
And I think, and that's what I was going to
ask you, what did you learn? What did you learn
about yourself? Other resilience?
Speaker 2 (18:53):
Uh not taking no for an answer, Oh uh yeah,
like literally resilience.
Speaker 1 (19:02):
Man. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
You know when I tell people that, they be like, man, listen,
probably after the second one, I just be like, don't
even you know, if they call me back, I don't
even want to go in, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (19:15):
So that's a lot to digest, it is, man, You
know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (19:19):
But once again, the blessing, you know, it may take
a while to get there, but the end result, the
blessing is that I end up doing three seasons on it.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
You know, so just think if I would have said, man,
I'm cool on the seventeenth one seasons.
Speaker 1 (19:40):
I just want to let that sit for a while
because there's somebody that is watching that has tried therapy.
I hear that a lot. Doc I tried it, it
doesn't work, and I have to challenge you to try
again and to not allow one experience to determine other
(20:04):
experiences or future experiences. That if somebody says, man, I've
tried that before, it doesn't work, and now I don't
want to and I want you guys to hear me
with your heart. I don't want to invalidate what you
feel about trying, because there is a way to keep trying.
Because even to say that I'm resilient at times, it's
(20:27):
also a weight because it's like why do I keep
getting back up? You know what I'm saying, like why
do I keep fighting? Why do I keep doing this thing?
And I would say this to add add to what
I'm saying, is that when you are committed to an
outcome that's conducive to the future and to the version
(20:53):
of yourself that you want, you would have went back
twenty times. Man, come on, bro, I can leave right now.
That's powerful, that's powerful.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
Yes, you do it because you know if you keep
knocking them down, all you need is at one. Yes,
all you need is at one open door. You know
what I mean, and knowing and having that mental to say, listen,
no matter what, this is the outcome. This is the goal.
(21:28):
To be on television, to be on a hit TV show,
you know what I'm saying, To be able to be
on set, to do what I love. That's why I came.
That's why I went back.
Speaker 1 (21:37):
Seventeen times because I love it.
Speaker 2 (21:40):
I love it.
Speaker 1 (21:41):
I love what I do.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
I love it. It's not work to me. Wow, that's
my passion.
Speaker 1 (21:50):
Now.
Speaker 2 (21:50):
Once you find your passion, you'll never work a day
in your life. So I'm not working. I'm having fun. Man,
and I get paid to dress up and they feed me.
Speaker 1 (22:01):
Come on, brouh. Come on, what job you know that's
gonna get you clothes, feed you and pay you. Ye'ah?
Come on.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
So that's that's why you asked me earlier. Man, it's
such a light brocause.
Speaker 1 (22:20):
I didn't been through the shit I dodnet been through it.
I know what it feels like.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
I know what it feels like to go to a
job that you don't want to go to, and in
between that, you got an audition that you gotta go
to mentally prepared for that, then go right back to
a job that.
Speaker 1 (22:37):
You don't want to be at.
Speaker 2 (22:39):
So now you gotta change your mental from I gotta
be ready for this, and once that's over, I gotta
switch my mind back to that.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:48):
And then once you make it, once you make it
to where you've been writing your goals and praying God,
And this is where why I got to be angry.
I have no reason to be in a negative mindset
because I'm doing what I love, because I pray for
this and I wrote it down as a goal and
(23:11):
I'm doing it. So why do I need the outside
world to make me in a negative way Because I'm
doing what I love? This is what you blood, sweat
and tears. Work hard, ten thirteen hour days driving Lyft,
driving uber, working this job, working that job, going to
all thishes this and now you're here, man, please, you
(23:32):
can't knock me off my square because I have been
through it.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
Man, Bro, I'd have been through it.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
So once you get to that that goal, that that
that thing that you want so bad, You're gonna appreciate
it more. You're gonna appreciate it more. You're gonna treat
it right because you know what the other side looked like.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
And you know what it took to get there.
Speaker 2 (23:55):
And you know what it took to get there.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Bro. When I tell you, you just helped so many people.
I'm here in the size, even in the room as
we sitting here, you helping people because this role to
self discovery, this journey to living the life that we
desire in whatever way and whatever capacity, it requires much
(24:20):
from us. And let me tell you this, what it
requires would never be fair. Never it ain't, would never
be fair. So we have to remove our mind. And
this is helping somebody to be because some of you,
your mind is blocking you from getting to the other side.
And you'll call it a mental health issue, but what
(24:41):
it is is just a mental challenge. Let's see here.
You just have to do the work. Because brother, I'm
sitting here thinking that seventeen auditions for three seasons, yep.
And some of you won't give up one year, for
ten years or for the rest of your life. Come on, bro,
some of you won't give up two years, three years.
(25:01):
You won't do the therapi. It's like I tell people,
I said, and they said, well, if you would go
if you could go back and do it again in
therapy and to seeing where you are, I said, Man,
I would do it all over again, because those five
years I was in therapy has now put me in
the position to where I free people now you know
(25:22):
what I mean, Where I'm able to really take my
life and to allow it to be an example and
an instrument for God to use. And I'm just sitting
here thinking seventeen auditions and you got three seasons out
and it started with just the first one. It started
(25:43):
with the first one, bro. And if you never made
it through the first one, you would have never knew
that you would have three season.
Speaker 2 (25:49):
Wait on, you probably wouldn't be on this couch talking.
Speaker 1 (25:52):
Br And how did that opportunity kareem open up? What
did that opportunity from bashield do?
Speaker 2 (25:59):
I met? I met my boy Jamie Turner, who at
that point was a story editor and then fast forward,
he's now the coach showrunner on All Americas.
Speaker 1 (26:16):
Wow, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
So God had a plan, you know what I mean.
It was just you're gonna stick to this plan. You know,
there's gonna be some obstacles, but what you're gonna do.
You're gonna give up, You're gonna stop, or you're gonna
keep pushing through. And you know, by me knowing him,
not even just All American, Like, he's got me a
(26:45):
job on another show that I was. You know, I
was think on my second interview for FedEx and I
was working another job, and he was like, man, I
got some I got something for.
Speaker 1 (26:58):
You, you know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (27:01):
Because he knows that I'm gonna show up right on time.
I'm gonna do the work, you know what I'm saying,
and I'm gonna treat everybody with respect. Yeah, And that
has led to you know, me being on this show
for seven seasons when the character was only supposed to
(27:22):
do two episodes. It's those things of just you know,
showing up, man, and just doing the work. Gotta do
the work.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
I want to back up, because you said the character
was only supposed to have two episodes.
Speaker 2 (27:44):
Yeah, that character was only supposed to do two episodes. Man,
I get shot in the season finale. But the showrunner,
the showrunner who I met ten years prior.
Speaker 1 (28:00):
I did her.
Speaker 2 (28:01):
I did an episode her first script for TV, which
is Buons, and that's how I met her. And on
that show probably probably the most money I made as
a guest star, because they kept pushing production back because
people kept getting sick. But that's how I got to
know and Ketch who's.
Speaker 1 (28:23):
The showrunner of All American.
Speaker 2 (28:25):
So I mean Jamie ten years, I mean NK eleven
and then fast forward they're both on this show.
Speaker 1 (28:33):
Wow, and you get on All American Homy seven seeds,
seven seasons from one decision, one decision yep, to keep
going back to.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
A seventeen audition seventeen times audition.
Speaker 1 (28:49):
If that is not healing enough for somebody to keep
doing it again, doc is not working for you, don't
hear me keep doing it again? Well, they said no,
they said, you know I needed this key doing it again.
(29:13):
And I think we said in the previous previous sessions
that healing is not linear. It's not that thing is
probably one of the most difficult tasks that you're ever
going to do, because you're going to have to rip
some band aids off, You're going to have to take
some masks off then, and you're going to have to
(29:37):
take off the clothes that you have been wearing. And
I'm meaning the clothes are the labels that you've attached
to yourself from the experiences that you've had, because you
have a traumatic experience, and now the traumatic experience become
how you identify yourself because you go, my name is
such and such, and this happened, and this happened. This
(30:01):
is why I dot that that that's a piece of
clothing that you are attaching to yourself and this is
not invalidate from your experience. But I believe in this
moment you can take what Kareem is sharing, and this
moment is to keep doing it again and doing it again,
meaning that you may have to do something different when
(30:24):
you do it again.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
Yeah, it's like it's like it's sometimes you have to
revert back to when you were a kid and you
have the opportunity to be outside and play, ride your bike, skateboard,
whatever it is, and you scrape your knee and your elbow.
Speaker 1 (30:43):
You didn't stop, you either, went.
Speaker 2 (30:47):
To a water hole, put some cold water on that
thing that nerd out, and he was like, all right,
I'm ready to go back.
Speaker 1 (30:54):
Go in the house.
Speaker 2 (30:55):
Hey, your mama put that green alcohol on your barn
that wound, burn the hell out, burn and then put
that put that band aid and then send you right
back on out there. You didn't stay in. We went
right back out there. So you're everybody is capable of
doing it. You're capable of doing because you did it
when you were a child.
Speaker 1 (31:15):
So what you saying, Karns, We're all capable of healing.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
Absolutely, We've done it time and time again. When you
had the chicken pox, did you just stop and just
be like, oh, it's over. You put that pink lotion on,
laid in that bed, ain't that soup and crackers washing them,
wash some stories with your grandmother or whatever, you know
(31:38):
what I mean. And then once some bumps went away,
you was outside.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
He was ready to go.
Speaker 2 (31:43):
Yah, that tooth came out, Take that thing out, put
in your pillow, have some money.
Speaker 1 (31:49):
You went to school the next day. That tooth grew back.
Speaker 2 (31:55):
So that lets you know, we can heal ourselves. We
just got to do the work.
Speaker 1 (32:00):
Mm hmm. Yeah, I'll just let this baronet. We can
heal ourselves, but you got to do the work. This this,
this last question I want to ask as as I
asked every guest. Uh. And it is really the staple
of this show and what it represents. What does healing
(32:23):
means to Kareem? Shdding something shadding, shedding something old that
you know was.
Speaker 2 (32:44):
Holding me back or whatever it is, and seeing something
grow new, you know, looking at it from a different perspective. Yeah,
shedding something old and letting the new growth, the new
(33:07):
growth come in.
Speaker 1 (33:09):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (33:10):
Oh, you know we are we are powerful beings.
Speaker 1 (33:18):
You know.
Speaker 2 (33:20):
The tongue is life and death. Yeah, so what you're
gonna do with it? You can continue to feed and
say negative things and that continues the snowball and your
life continues to look the same way. Or you can
self check yourself each and every day. Thoughts become things,
(33:44):
Thoughts become things. All right, let me check myself. Let
me go into a mental space of thinking of something positive.
What brings me joy, what brings me happiness, what puts
a smile on my face? Let me start with that
little thing thing right there. Then let's go to the next.
You know, I think everybody has the power to write
(34:09):
your own ticket to happiness. You do, you put a
song on your favorite song, you get the smiling, you
get the dancing it's off of a song, or you
pull a picture up or pair of shoes or clothing
and you're like, oh, man, okay, it's in the good
(34:31):
it's right, I'm ready to go. So we have the
power to do it. You just got to go forth
and do it. It's gonna be a little uncomfortable, but
you got to do it. And you're worth it. You're
worth it, man, You're worth it. Everybody is here for
(34:52):
a purpose or reason. Don't don't let that die out, man,
because you're here for a reason. God, don't make no mistakes,
no period.
Speaker 1 (35:08):
Man. I'm just I'm just basking this in man, because
that you're worth it. Part It stands out to me
and everything that you're saying that we're worth taking the risks,
We're worth taking the journey. And this podcast speaks to
both men and women, but for the men that are watching,
(35:30):
and this is just a message to you, and I
want Kareem to look at this camera and talk to
you as we close this out. And I'm just telling
you that, brother, you're more than worth hit man, You're
deserving of it. Kareem can I and I just feel
this in this moment, man, because I'm sure you know,
individuals look at your character and look at what you've
(35:53):
been able to do your body of work and acting.
But in this moment, I just if you could, let's
just take an opportunity and just talk to a brother
or a sister that made it struggling to make the
decision to do it again, hood, if you could just
speak to them.
Speaker 2 (36:12):
Yeah, I'll break it down simple. Out of a billion, spired,
you made it. You're the one that made it to
the aid and you are here out of a billion.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
You special.
Speaker 2 (36:31):
You are special. You are here for a reason. You
have a purpose and all you have to do is
do that work to find out what that purpose is.
But you're here for a reason, you know, and from
that point on, you know, like I said, you have
(36:53):
the ability to write your own ticket to happiness.
Speaker 1 (36:56):
You gotta do the work. Brother, What a way to
close it out. You have your own ticket to write
to happenings. But you gotta do the world. Brother, It's
always it's rich when we talk because we go deep
and we have these these cathartic conversations man, that that
(37:21):
are encouraging to me and then their life and enriching
for the soul. And so Man, I speak blessings over you. Man,
I'm praying that you get another season with all Americas,
and praying that all of your endeavors, your auditions, all
of the things that you're putting your hands to, that
God not only breathes on it, that he blesses it
(37:43):
and allow it to expand, and that He keep expanding
your territories in giving you years of youth. Man, because
like I said, brother, I don't know what you I
know your real age, but at none of their business
what your age is. But my good brother here is
thriving in an aging backwards. And as we're closing out
to my brothers that are watching, man, brothers, take care
(38:04):
of yourself. Go to the doctor. Stop ignoring the chest pain,
stop ignoring the leg pain. We need to age better
so we can get to the place where we're pouring
wisdom back into this world. And I love that you
do that, man, on your platform, and then you do
(38:25):
that through your work. Brother. So man, thank you for
joining me. Today man on this healing community. Man as
always good seeing you Man. Listen. You can listen to
Just Here with Doctor J audibly on the Black Effect Podcast,
iHeart Podcast or anywhere else that you listen to podcasts.
Don't just pop in and listen to what's happening over
(38:46):
here in the healing community. I want you to subscribe
and join Just Heal with Doctor J YouTube family, and
over here we're healing and we're doing some great things.
And I'm just excited about what we're doing here, and
I'm excited that you get to listen to conversations that's
going to encourage you to continue to growing, encourage you
(39:09):
to continue expanding in life. And until next time, remember
healing is a journey and wholeness is the destination. Just
Here with Doctor J a production of the Black Effect
podcast Network. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
(39:32):
And you can follow me at King J. Barnett on
Instagram and x and follow us on YouTube. Just Heal
Doctor J
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