November 18, 2021 • 52 mins
In this very special episode, Sammy Jaye sits down with actress/youtuber Claudia Sulewski. They have a very candid and honest discussion about the reality of making it in the entertainment business, staying true to who you are, her new movie, I Love My Dad, her relationship with Finneas, the pros and cons of social media, anxiety, journaling and so much more!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hi guys, and welcome back to this week's episode of
a Let's Be Real podcast. I'm your host, Sammy J.
And welcome. This week, I got to chat with the
incredible Claudia Seluski. She is a YouTube o G. She's
been on the platform for eleven years. She's done everything
from vlogs to lifestyle. She's also done some amazing collaborations
(00:22):
and her newest venture is starring and I Love My Dad,
which is a movie that just wrapped production a few
months ago and it hasn't come out, but we talked
all about that, having a healthy balance with social media, therapy, anxiety, journaling, life,
her relationship with Phineas, and so much more. I hope
you guys like this week's episode. Claudia, I'm so thrilled
(00:50):
that you're in my podcast. First of all, I just
realized this is like the first time a couple is
coming on because we had Phineas in season one and
now you're here in season three. I know, that's awesome.
I feel like we need to then have a reunion
where we're all together, the three of us on the
same conversation. Yeah, we should. And you know what I've
(01:10):
been I've watched your videos. I sink like five years now,
so I love your channel. I love the way you
edit um and you've been on social media for so
many years, and I know you can relate to this.
Being on social media at any age can be difficult
with everything that it's surrounded by. What has it been
like being on social media for so long, but also
trying to keep like the same mental health. What's interesting,
(01:34):
I think is social media changes so much. I feel
like it kind of didn't really exist when I first
started making YouTube videos, so I guess thinking about what
my headspace was and where I thought this was all
going when it first started versus now is so different
because when I started YouTube, I'm not sure Instagram really
(01:57):
existed yet or it had just come into play. TikTok
didn't exist, and it felt like I think the shift
was like I treated social media as this thing where
I'm putting these things out and I am editing cute
videos and having so much fun in the creation process
and dumping it somewhere, and now social media has become
(02:20):
this like bigger beast where you're creating, you are also
you know, watching and taking in other people's content, and
you're also communicating. I was talking about this with my
friend the other day, how like we feel that social
media breaks are really healthy, right, just just getting off
Instagram for a few days or whatever. But now there's
this component where like I have so many people in
(02:42):
my life that I only DM and that's like our
source of communication. Interesting, so then what do you do?
It's like the new text message, it really is. I
So I just started college, and something I'm realizing is
everyone they don't ask for your number. They only ask
for your snapchat, which is so odd to me because
I just deleted snaptrat Instagram. By the way, I didn't
(03:04):
delete my accounts. I was just like, I need a break.
But like it goes to show the people that actually
care about you will text you definitely, and the people
that don't really you know, have an interest, will just
send you random photos and won't even have a conversation.
It's just it's odd. There is definitely like a difference
in the platforms. I feel with d m NG exactly
(03:26):
what you're saying, it's like sharing a photo or commenting
on something or just giving it a heart, while text
messaging now is like this commitment where if you've made
a friend on social media and you exchange numbers, You're like, oh,
we're going there. It's like a true friendship. And then
if you go to FaceTime, Oh my goodness, a hundred percent.
Are you a big facetimer? Do you FaceTime friends every day?
(03:47):
You know? I think so, because I forget. There's just
something about it that forces me to be more present,
because when I'm on the phone and I'm doing something,
I can so easily be distracted. When I'm looking in
someone else's face, It's just more personal and I like
talking to faces instead of just like audio, if that
makes any sense, What about you? I totally agree. I'm
(04:08):
such a fan of FaceTime. Phineas is on tour right now,
so we are constantly facetiming all the time. Although the
feature of being able to swipe away and still have
the little person, you know, the little bugs, but it's
on pause? Is it on pause now? Or can you
think it is? Because sometimes I'm looking at his face
and I'm like, you are not, you are not looking,
(04:29):
You're not, you are not you are reading a text messager.
So it's when that eye glances Yeah, exactly exactly. Um,
but I totally agree. I think FaceTime is like the
optimal prime communication experience. Um. And it's like the closest
to real life, which is great. And also like I
mean truly, I feel like I learned this throughout COVID,
(04:50):
but like everyone is a FaceTime away, and it's crazy
how connected you can feel after even just like a
ten minute conversation. It's one button away, put that on
a shirt. Um. So we love it for that reason.
But to jump back to like social media and kind
of maintaining sanity, right and all of that, and I
(05:11):
think we are just like living in a world where
we are all sharing our lives, whether you are an influencer, creator, actor,
you know, whatever is bringing you to social media, or
if you just mostly like a watch or a listener
exactly all these things. Um, I don't know, it's tricky.
I was thinking about this recently about like the contrast
(05:33):
of like I feel like sometimes we post to feel
seen or for people to see that we are busy,
we are doing things, or Hi, look I'm happy and
I yeah, it's to prove something, yeah, And it's like
and then there's another version where you know, you you
have a photo that makes you really happy or you
are documenting a memory and you want to share it,
(05:55):
and that's the really pure side of it. It is
such a double edged sword, and I feel like every
single day is sort of like a little bit different,
And um, I think I fall in both categories. I
think we all do. And yeah, so I don't know
what the answer is. I'm still figuring that out. I
think everybody is. But it's hard to when you want
(06:17):
to post something, but then it's so easy to get
caught up in the oh my goodness, this didn't get
any likes. Oh my goodness, I had to delete this.
Turn off your legs, That's what I did. And you
just post what you want to post. That's what I say.
That's what I'm trying to the place I'm trying to
get to. Have you seen the social Yes, I turned
(06:38):
off my Instagram and Snapchat notifications since I've watched it,
and I don't have them on anymore, and I only
have my like, Gmail and text and that's it. Amazing.
Same here. I the notification setting that I had on
before watching that was like anyone who I follow, if
they comment or like anything, I would see all of it.
And I just like, do not need to know what
(06:59):
time someone is liking something like if I am really
that curious, I can go to the photo and I
can click on view more under the likes and like, see,
oh cool, cool cool. I don't need to see the
moment it's happening, you know, So same here. I'm glad
that we're all going through that because I feel like
it's one of those things where I've noticed, just in
(07:20):
the short time I've been at college, just how much
time everybody is on their phones, including me. So I'm
trying to cut back. I'm really in a space right
now where I'm trying to be the best version of myself,
where I'm trying to grow. And something I love about
your channel is you're documenting your whole process. Um, I
know you've gone into journal journaling, and I'm really trying
(07:42):
to get into it. What are your tips because I
have trouble like it's not doing, it's starting to do.
It's like sitting down designating the time. Does it really help?
Would you say? Okay? I love it? And honestly, it's
one of those if you're looking at it as like
a form of therapy, it is something that can it
(08:04):
can make you feel different ways, like I think it is. Um,
it's like untruthful to be like it's going to make
you feel amazing all the time, because sometimes like the
times when I really need a journal or when I'm
at a low point and and then journaling it like
makes me sadder. But there at the end of the day,
(08:24):
I just like love recording and writing down like where
I'm at, you know, on a specific day or in
a specific moment, because I love looking back. I mean,
I think that's like partially why I've made my YouTube
channel so personal and and very vlog styles because I
just love like being able to record these memories. You
can see your growth as a human, which is awesome.
(08:46):
That's crazy. It is very trippy to go back on
videos and see like what I was interested in reading
and what I'm talking about and the way that I'm speaking, Like,
I don't know, we just like change and evolve in
so many different ways. But I think with journal this
is what I'll say, um, and I'm like trying to
do this to myself or for myself with reading right now,
which is like give yourself smaller hills to climb. So like,
(09:12):
journaling can definitely feel very intimidating. What do you write
about how many pages. Like people talk about like do
morning pages three pages a day. I rarely am journaling
three pages a day. That is only if I'm like
on one, I'm like caffeine's running through the veins. I'm like, yeah,
I got so much right. But I think like giving
yourself um, just like literally the shortest, smallest prompts of
(09:36):
like one of my favorite things to do is, um,
let's say it's like at the start of a week,
I'll just write, I'll write the date, and I'll write
like more of, less of, and I'll just write more
of and then just list things that like have brought
me joy or things that I want to do more
and then just like less of things that haven't brought
me joy, you know, less of staying up too late,
(09:57):
less of you know, whatever it is people pleasing I
don't know like, And I think giving yourself like a
few questions like that gives you that format of like
because sometimes it's you're just like, I don't know what
to write, and other times I just make a list
of things that I'm like grateful for, and that puts
me in a that is definitely like the most rewarding
(10:20):
I think in the moment, because being grateful, is it
really just kind of like put things into perspective. Yeah, yeah, totally.
So I think start like give yourself no expectations on
like writing pages and pages and pages. That is not
what it is. I use my journal to write like
list to do list, like literally anything. Sometimes I draw,
(10:41):
and I think that's what it's fun, is like dedicating
a journal to literally dumping whatever you want in it.
I think also like my like perfectionism wants me to
like stay in theme with what I am writing, and
I'm like, okay, well right, You're like, well, if I'm
going to draw on this journal, then I'm gonna have
a separate journal for the draw. And it's like you
(11:03):
just have to release that and be like like I
literally have my drawl right here. I'm like, this girly
has everything in it. And the way that I organize
it in my brain is I'm like, this is my girly.
Love that, and she stays with me and I write
whatever I want in it. And I think releasing that
sort of feeling of like needing to organize really kind
(11:24):
of like sets you for you a little bit, I know,
And I think I honestly think we have a lot
in common because I know you did a whole video
about being in a funk, and girl, do I relate
to that because I don't know if it's a combination
of just like being in a pandemic for a year
and a half or like just growing as a human.
But you want to better yourself, but sometimes like I
(11:44):
saw your video and I related to it and just
like I feel like I want to get a bunch done,
but then I don't. I feel worse if I don't. Yeah,
I mean that all falls into like giving yourself the
smaller like hills to climb. I think, Um, I don't know,
it's really tricky, Like I'm I'm personally coming into understanding
(12:06):
that I for so long have like based my value
and worth on my productivity. Um, I don't know where
that came into play with my childhood, but that's certainly
where I found most worth. And I'm like kind of
re um, I don't know, I'm like trying to rewire
in myself and be like no, no, no, that's so
incredible though that you're doing that. Yeah, And it's I
(12:30):
think we're just like in this time of life where
like hustle culture is just like very you know, it's
seen as like that you are you are killing it,
if you are busy, if you are productive, if you're
doing a million things. But I think like finding joy
and just like doing things for yourself and just letting
(12:52):
yourself relax, like that's really important, and I for so
long would feel so guilty about it, or like if
I have slower periods in life, I'm like, oh my gosh,
I'm not doing enough. Oh my gosh. And it's like
always just like remembering to give yourself the perspective of
just like if things are feeling slower or if things
are feeling less chaotic, like eventually things will pick back
(13:13):
up for a season of life and you will look
back and be like, oh my gosh, I had all
the time to like get into all those books I
told myself I was going to read. I had all
the time to like focus on, uh, doing hikes or
like whatever. I think. It's just it's like so perspective
and that's what I'm telling myself. And I think we're
all experiencing a lot of that, definitely through COVID. I
(13:35):
think like COVID forced a lot of us to look
inward and now that we're in this like in between
where things are opening back up and we're like re
establishing our relationship to like balancing life. Yeah exactly. Um,
Like I personally have been like going really crazy on
like socializing. I'm trying to get I think I'm trying
(13:57):
to repay all the lost time. And you know that's
tricky too, because sometimes you just need it yourself. It's
listening to like your body and what you need, which
it can be really hard. And I think social media
exacerbates the household culture because you see everybody coming out
with a new line or new this or knew then
it's like, you know, sometimes you just need time for
(14:19):
yourself to grow. And that's just as productive I feel like.
And that's to be reminded of a And I think also,
like back to what I was saying about, like feeling
the need to post on social media to feel seen
by others. It's like, at the end of the day,
if you are not genuinely happy and feeling just present
(14:41):
and grateful and fulfilled in all those things, like that
is where the source should be coming from. Those are
the questions for yourself to be answering for yourself, not
for others, you know what I mean. Absolutely, I'm a
big proponent of therapy. I've been in therapy since I
was like on and off there was like eight that's amazing,
and I am so grateful for that because I've learned
(15:03):
so much about myself and how I grow. You talked
about the therapy where you put these like electros on
your Can you please tell me more about this cause
I'm very curious. I literally just came home from an appointment,
like I just had it done this morning. Okay, wait,
please explain. So Okay, So it's called neurofeedback, and it
(15:24):
is something that like is becoming more widely known, but
I certainly I have never heard of it, and it's
sort of you hear it and you're like this little
life hack, like this sounds like kind of life hack
right here? It really does, it really does. So I
got introduced to it through Phineas because his therapist like
specializes in it. But there's I guess there are therapists
(15:47):
all around that do it. Like it's definitely becoming more
and more popular. But basically neuro feedback, there's like two
stages of it. The first one is they're like taking
all these little electro things and sticking them all around
your head because like basically you're different parts of your
brain obviously are in different locations, and so she kind
(16:09):
of she's very specific about where she puts everything, because
every part has a different purpose. And the first thing
that she does, I'm saying she because his therapists woman,
and she UM essentially like sends off a very low frequency.
And at first I was like, this is us. This
is scary. This does not sound uh safe, but it's
(16:31):
actually like the amount of UM doesn't our computers exactly exactly,
and like so the wavelengths that it's sending are so
low they are like I forgot the the actual number,
but it is the smallest fraction of what like literally
these headphones are emitting or a cell phone, and it's
(16:52):
so low that your brain is able to pick up
and read on it because all the other devices around
us are so high that our brain is like no, no no, no,
we're not at that speed, so we don't care about that.
So it's low enough for your brain to actually interact
with the waves. And so like the first the first
few sessions of it, she's like emitting a very low
frequency just to see what the brain is sending off,
(17:14):
and so it catches the size of the wavelengths and
the speed, which basically shows, um, how how developed you
are in those areas, and then how hard you're working
in those areas. And so you're like fully having a
graph displayed in front of you showing you what areas
of your brain are least developed. And so in that case,
(17:34):
it would be like suppression. Um so where like your
brain has decided, oh, I don't really need to develop
this area. So for me, like just sort of with
my childhood and my environment, like, for example, my emotional
suppression is like the smallest little sliver because at some
point in my formative years I told myself, I don't
(17:55):
I need to take after others and not be so
concerned with my emotions. My emotions don't matter, and so
my emotional suppression is like this tiny little sliver and
it's it's wild to see it. It's validating, but it's
also like, yeah, validates everything you think. It totally does.
And it's interesting because then like the analytical and critical
(18:17):
side of my brain was like super super high. If anything,
it was like hypo suppressed, which was like over the standard,
so it was like blue. Everything else is like super
Origin small, super blue. So um. Basically, she explained like, oh,
you are doing a lot of your emotional processing through
the critical side of your brain, because you're essentially telling
yourself how you should be feeling about things. And I
(18:39):
was like, yes, I do that. I'm always talking myself
into how I should be feeling about things. So once
she does all of that, you like learn all of it.
And now I'm in this process where she's starting to
tweak the frequencies because essentially, like there is a healthy
frequency at which your brain should be operating at and um.
(18:59):
Essentially like she sends it off and then your brain
listens to that and it decides like, oh I like
this more, so I'm gonna I'm gonna match this. And eventually,
if you do it enough, your brain will learn like,
oh I really like this this speed and I like
this wavelength. And so what it's eventually supposed to do
(19:20):
is just sort of like help rewire your brain and
help remind your brain that it doesn't need to suppress
these different areas. And what's crazy about it too, is
like it has helped cure so many different conditions and diseases,
Like she's had patients that can hear better, or like, um,
someone used to one of her patients like used to
(19:42):
know Chinese and like completely forgot it because she blacked
out her childhood and then one day she woke up
and like remembered the entire language. It's like, I can
speak Chinese again. So it's like kind of going into
your subconscious a little bit. Yeah, Like it's it definitely.
It's not like creating any superpowers for you, but if
there's anything that your brain has chosen to hold back,
(20:03):
like it can help open that door again and be
like hey, it's okay to you know, like access this again.
It's really crazy. And so it's it's like helped people
with memory or yeah, any hearing loss or like site, Um,
I have really bad um like selective hearing. And I'm
that's the thing that I am hoping. Like sometimes like
(20:25):
Phineas and I will just be hanging out and we'll
be having a full bown conversation. In the middle of
the sentence, I'm like, oh my god, I have no
idea what he's talking about. I don't know what what
why that's happening. But I that is the thing that
I'm hoping that I can relate to that because so
I have my learning disabilities processing, so I have dealt
without my entire life. So I feel you on that.
(20:45):
Oh my gosh. It's very frustrating because I'm often having
to ask people to repeat themselves. And it's not that
you're not listening. It's just that your brain genuinely can't
take in the information and process it. But it's like
you here be you can't process it, yes, all the time,
and like or I'll hear someone say a word and
I'm like and I'll be like, wait, did you just
(21:06):
say blah blah blah? And it isn't an English word
at all, and they're like, what how did you get
that from that? Like, I don't know. I feel you
on that. Okay, we have to take a quick break,
but when we come back, I want to talk about
your hobbies outside of acting in YouTube, what you love
about storytelling, your relationship with Phineas, and so much more.
We'll be right back and we're back. Something that I've like,
(21:38):
try to find his outlets to um turning shitty situations
into something art Like that's how this podcast came about
came out from my anxiety. Um so that's what I've
been trying to do. But do you have I know
you paint. I know you have a bunch of hobbies.
Is there a hobby during quarantine that you picked up?
Oh hobby that Oh my gosh. I feel like not
(22:02):
even specifically like painting creatively, but I did a lot
of like wall painting the COVID, Like I I decided
that I wanted to like paint my entire office and
painting an entire room wout as an individual, and also
(22:22):
like I think the reason why I didn't want to
hire anyone to do it because I was like, I
don't want to take the furniture out and like covering
and cover it all up like I can do it
wall by wall, and um I just like d I
Y queen a d I Y queen. And it was,
oh my gosh, it took so long, but also I
found like so much peace in it, like just when
(22:45):
you go all out and you get like the big
roller and like the pan and you're just like it's
also a workout too. So weirdly enough, I found myself
painting a lot of walls during COVID. I like also
painted my bathroom and now I'm thinking of painting our
master bathroom. I have like the paint can like sitting
there staring at me every day, and I'm like, what
if I just cracked it open? But if I just no, no, no,
(23:07):
I should hire someone. I should just hire someone. But
what if I just did it myself? Mean what you
should do? Then? While I was painting what I got
obsessed with Bob Ross for the pandemic, And of course
I watched his videos to call asleep. But if you
go to Bob Ross Incorporated his like website, you can
buy all his paints, his brushes, his canvases, everything. And
(23:28):
then what I would do is I'd watch Bob rossors
and paint with him. Huh. And I actually they came
out well, like really well, and you use his paints everything.
But I saw a YouTube video where a girl did
a Bob Ross painting on a wall, which could be
fun to do. I saw that, I know, oh my gosh,
that I wish I had the I think for me,
(23:52):
like I would just feel like that's that's too much
happening on one wall, Like I like things like so
clean and minimalistics, or I'll just get the Barbara us
like kit and paint girl. It's great that Yeah, that
is really that is like really really good information to know.
I feel like going into paint vers is very inating. Yeah,
(24:13):
because you're like acrylic versus oil, satin versus shine versus
matt and you're just like where do I begin? Yeah.
And also I'm a perfectionist, so like whenever I get
stressed about doing a painting, Bob Ross was like, there's
no mistakes, only happy accidents, and I was like, thanks, Bob.
He was really calming me down when I was painting. Wow,
(24:33):
I should really. I feel like I've never like dove
into that world, but do it. It's so clear. Yeah,
it's so clear that it's like only a low risk,
high reward like experience because they come out beautiful. And
I've seen like YouTubers do like, yeah, let me see
your let me see your paintings. I feel like I've
(24:54):
seen so many YouTubers like painting to Bob Ross and
it comes out almost exactly to what Keep in mind,
I'm not a painter. Okay, so this is without having
ever really painted. This is okay, So this was this
is for my senior thing. We were drawing on the sidewalk. Anyways,
I drew this was my first one I ever did.
It wasn't on the canvas boos that on this sidewalk.
(25:16):
If you can kind of see stunning the classic trees,
the classic and that was just with charcoal. That was
with charcoal. That's crazy. Bob ros is a great teacher. Wow.
So you were just like following everything but with charcoal.
Does he have charcoal tutorials? No? I was just kind
of figuring it out as I went because I need
(25:36):
something to like drive my brain. Sometimes I find it
very helpful. Oh my gosh. Well, I'm going to look
into his website. I mean, Bob Bars not sponsored, but
Bob Bras. I love you, we love you. Another weird
parallel we have is that you moved to l A
when you're eighteen. I just moved here from New York
and nineteen. And I know you used to do like
(25:57):
red carpet stuff for Team Vogue. I did that for
Radio Disney. So I feel like we have this weird
like similar like parallels happening, parallels happening definitely. And something
that I've always been really inspired by your videos is
just how driven you are in your work ethic and
just getting stuff done because what people don't realize is
(26:17):
they just see the finished product, but how much work
it takes into just creating a video. You know, it's
coming up with the concept, it's producing it, it's editing,
it's being in it. What is the process like to
stay so driven and not not loose sight of like
your end goal because it can be hard when you
see like fourteen year olds making millions of dollars from
(26:39):
just doing these dances on TikTok. Definitely, I think like
that was the evolution of YouTube that none of us
could really um anticipate for anyone that started way back
in the day. Because you're an o G. I feel
like and I feel like right around the time I
(27:00):
moved out was when we really started seeing like viral
videos were definitely a thing. Like I think that's like
what started YouTube, Like the man there was like a
video at the zoo or something like, but specifically like
the clickbait culture and like the explosions and like like
when all of that sort of came into play. I
(27:21):
think for me because when I when I started YouTube,
it came from such an authentic place of just like
this is so fun. For me, this is fascinating, Um,
I want to do this for fun. Like, I think
a huge part of me held onto that. I definitely
understood that it had become my job and I had
(27:43):
to there were responsibilities with that and taking it seriously,
but also like, yeah, I think when I started seeing
that shift, it never felt authentic and like sometimes honestly
look back and I'm like, damn, maybe I maybe I
should have jumped on like some of those trends right
just in terms of like the types of videos that
(28:03):
we're doing really well or everyone was collaborating, and I
was always like, that's not you exactly at the end
of the day, like it's so clear that I didn't
have interest in it, And looking back at it now,
I guess like I look at all my videos and like,
of course I'm younger, and so there's embarrassment in that,
but like, genuinely, I'm so proud of everything that I've made,
(28:24):
and I think like holding onto that, I guess like
integrity for for lack of a less dramatic word, it
it's like allowed me to be really proud of my
YouTube videos and be proud of the platform. And I
think that's helped to maintain this uh like healthy relationship
that I have with it now where it doesn't feel
(28:46):
like gimmicky or slimy or like any of these sorts
of things. You know, and like strictly from a viewer perspective,
it comes across because you can go through any of
your videos and you see the common theme, which is
just you. It's it's you could tell it's not trying
to be anybody else, and that's refreshing, especially in the
world where everything is so saturated with the exact same thing.
(29:08):
So I think it's so great what you're doing. What
do you love about storytelling? Oh? Um, the thing that
oh gosh, I mean honestly, like this is where I
geek out. I feel like I love every single different
component coming together. I feel that, I think because I
I really I really like I see myself as an
(29:31):
editor first, because I just love the editing process, because
I feel like that is like that is like the
moment where you're the chef in the kitchen and you're
like adding and piecing everything together, putting the story together exactly.
And I often I'll hear sometimes like I'll just go
through like different because we have to use world two
free music. I'll go through like world two free websites
(29:53):
or whatever SoundCloud and I will like find a song.
This was my process back in the day when I
made like a lot of look books where I'd find
a song and I did envision like what I could
see with it, and then shoot based on the song. Um. Nowadays,
because my content is more like just personal, I'll kind
of like cut everything together, find something that feels harmonious,
(30:15):
like with the footage, and then just like play around
from there and like cut to the beat and then
like give every every video a theme and all this stuff.
And now it's like getting into like acting more and
stuff Like I find myself like getting so excited about
that because it's like on this bigger scale with like
the project I just shot. I'd be like, you know,
(30:37):
you should really have like this sort of song with this,
and he's like, oh my god, you're so right and
so collaboration, you know what, as a YouTube as someone
who's been yes, you're doing everything alone, and that has
been like the most I just I love working with people.
It is really fun to allow yourself to like trust
others and work on one thing together because get off
(31:00):
each other totally, totally. It's so refreshing. I think like
that is definitely what's keeping me, I guess like motivated
these days and inspired and excited, because if you're yeah,
it sometimes can feel very like isolating, kind of bouncing
ideas only with yourself. Um, and I feel like I've
(31:23):
definitely sometimes I'm like, Okay, well, I could be sitting
down with friends and like brain storming videos together and stuff.
But I think when you're just so used to being
able to rely on yourself for so long, you get
stuck in that. So it's it's nice to be forced
to like collaborate and like work with the community of
people and stuff. And I'm very excited about this film.
(31:44):
I love my dad because thank you. First of all,
what people don't realize that I tried to spread I
have a bunch of friends or actors. Auditioning is the
full time job in itself, and then if you get
booked in my brain, but I feel like people, I
feel like I need to preface that because well, what
would you say your ratio it's per auditions? How many?
Oh my gosh, well okay, truly, I don't even know
(32:07):
what the ratio would be, but I can I can
confirm that I've been on like thousands of auditions. It
is so that whole process is so wild, and you really,
like I feel like in order to stay we're talking
about like the sanity of social media. Meanwhile, with auditions,
that is the bigger beast that I'm trying to tackle,
(32:30):
and I think it's like it's really I feel very
fortunate in the fact that, like, I have many different
things going on, and so I try every time I
go into an audition for room or if I'm prepping
for like a self tape, just reminding myself to have fun.
I think it is so easy to sense that in
(32:52):
a room, and I genuinely feel like the projects that
I have booked were the projects that I've gone like
super far along the process, are the ones where I'm like,
I'm just gonna have fun. I'm never going to get this,
you know. And having that approach really helps with the
constant rejection because that is just the industry that it is,
(33:12):
and there are so many people going out for the
same role, and there are so many factors that are
like outside of yourself, that are not in your control,
so not about you, and it's so hard to realize
that too, I know a hundred percent. And it's like,
so it's it's tricky, It's yeah, there are lots of
auditions all the time, lots of many many many, um
(33:35):
and and yeah that is just a part of it
and accepting that and just being game. I think also,
like you know, we're talking about how perspective is everything.
I think too for anyone that is like trying to
get into acting and um, wanting to take it seriously
and everything. I think also like looking at every audition
as an opportunity to show face in front of a
(33:56):
new casting director or like I just meeting people if
a thing a hundred percent, and I think like things
always come full circle. There have been so many moments
where like there's a project that I that I've recently
been attached to, I can't realize anything about it because
I'm like crossing my fingers that it happens. But they
(34:16):
will manifest manifest. But they had seen like older tapes
of mind that furroles I never booked, but they were like,
I loved your tape for this specific thing, and and
that's how we knew you were the right person for that.
And so you just never know where your efforts are
like really going to come back in your direction, you know,
and it's it's really hard to feel like you're at
(34:38):
least I feel this way where like you're behind. Yeah.
So we had Wayne Brady on he was that he
kicked off the season three and he said, um, you're
right where you're supposed to be. You're not ahead of anyone,
You're not behind. And that's something that I'm constantly having
to tell myself because it's so eat. We're in a
world where it's so easy to compare yourself and especially
(34:59):
with social immediate and I think if we all just
realize that we're all on our own path, there's room
for everybody. Yep, there shouldn't be any competition because we're
all on our own journey. And also to add to that,
like don't compare your chapter one to someone's like chapter twenty.
I think like, especially in the beginning, I used to
(35:21):
totally look up to like different actresses and think like,
oh my gosh, I wish I was booking these sorts
of roles and stuff. And then I look back at
it and I'm like, they've been acting since they were five,
and I have been acting for only five years, you know,
and and remembering that as well, that it's like a dent.
Everyone is on their own path. Everyone is on a
different part, in a different chapter of their journey. And like,
(35:44):
I think you're totally right that there's room for everyone.
I just in terms of like content opportunities, platforms, mediums,
like we are at a time where there is so
much of it, truly, and um, I think that it's great.
It's very very fruitful and I and it's really encouraging
(36:05):
because there's, yeah, there's just like so much happening. Okay, Claudia,
we have to take one more quick break, but when
we come back, I want to talk to about the
difference between working alone, like creating YouTube content versus being
in a movie and working with production teams and having
that collaborative process Phineas and so much more. While we're
(36:25):
right back and we're back, we're also living in a
world where instant gratification is everything. Post you get the
instant gratification of likes, but when you're working on a
movie or developing these projects that won't see the light
of day for a long time, oh my gosh, you
(36:47):
really have to like practice patients a what has that
been like for you because you can just post a
video and then get that instant gratification. But I love,
I Love My Dad doesn't even have a set release
date yet, I know it is. Yeah, that is one
of you know what I think, Um, I think having
(37:07):
patience for those things. And I often feel like the
things that take the most time like they're taking the
most time for a reason. I mean, of course, like
a YouTube video versus a feature film very different, and
I think it's just a little bit different. Um, And
I think like it just it's a sign of like
(37:28):
how precious it helps. It's exciting, like just having this
build up because it's it's helping me just like continue
to appreciate the opportunity and what it is and and
hopefully what it becomes and what people's reaction will will
be to it. And I feel like, like, don't you
sort of feel like in terms of the immediate gratification.
(37:51):
So there's like posting a photo maybe one of the
easiest things you can really do right, and you get
it immediately, and then it's like a YouTube video or
a pot cast episode, there's like a little bit more
time and there's a little bit more time into the
editing and then the release of it and then okay, great,
now it's here, and it's like, so I don't know,
I feel like the things that take a long time, Um,
(38:11):
it's instant gratification kind of goes away because you're kind
of like okay and just put it out, Like that's
how I feel at this point. Yeah, and totally and
like also, don't you feel like with the things that
do give you immediate gratification you get over it sooner
because you got it so fast, you know, you're like
all right, onto the next That's a really good point, Claudia,
because I'm thinking about it, and I got the most satisfaction.
(38:34):
The most satisfaction was when we launched season one because
that was the most length of time it took. My goodness,
I haven't thought of that. It's sort of like works
both ways, like it'll it takes the most time leading
up to it and then like just keeps you so
fulfilled and like grateful for it also just continuing on
past its life, you know, like like an album for example, right,
(38:56):
like it'll take a couple of years to produce, but
then the shell life is years and years, if not decades,
which is so great with that. Yeah, what would you say,
the best piece of advice you've received, Oh, the best
piece of advice I've ever received. Um, I think like
the reoccurring theme that I'm having for myself right now,
(39:19):
or like what I'm reminding myself. And I definitely hurt somewhere.
I don't know by who, but it's like, at the
end of the day, all you have is you, like you,
You are there when you are born, you are there
every single day with yourself. You are there to the
end of your days. And I think, like that's really
important because I find that I like often lose myself
(39:41):
in my environment and my surroundings, like whoever I'm talking
to or you know, my relationship or my friendships, like
I often give so much of I'm a big people
pleaser and I'm working on it and it's gotten way better. Girl.
I feel that. See, I knew we had a lot
in comment. I just knew it. I know we're like
(40:02):
unveiling all the onions. Layers are unpeeling, I know, and
I so I just feel that I often lose myself
and sort of give up all these self sacrifices in
order to make sure everyone around me is comfortable and
like that is definitely a great quality to have, but
knowing where your limit is, um, it's really important. Like
(40:25):
my therapist, Uh, this is like a few months ago,
but it just hit me so hard. I one time
like flipped a question to her and I was like,
if you're stuck in a position where you know you're
going to disappoint someone or you can just sort of
disappoint yourself by like you know, pleasing them, Like, are
you always choosing to disappoint the other person? And she
was like, and I was like really like even like
(40:49):
I know, I'm like, but what if it's like a
really big deal for the person, Like it, let's say
it's their birthday or whatever, and you just don't have
a lot of energy, But it's fine, you can suck
it up, and you can. And she's like, if you
keep this pointing yourself, eventually you will just disappoint everyone.
And that's stuck with me because rights like if you
keep just giving and giving your time and your energy,
(41:11):
if you don't give yourself the time to like fuel
up and and have be full enough to be able
to give, Like there's a big difference between giving and pleasing.
Pleasing is like an I lose you in situation because
I am taking from essentially like just there's nothing of me,
(41:32):
Like I am just taking pieces of me because there
is nothing extra in there too. And then on the
other side of it, giving is like when you have
enough to share, and it's an eye win you in situation.
And so I think that is really important, Like our
relationship with ourselves and what we're saying to ourselves literally
(41:52):
like affects the way that we are seeing everything and
like interpreting everything a hundred per scent. And I think that, like,
I think that is my answer, my very long answer
to your question, because it impacts like every aspect of life.
Would you say, now that Phineas is on tour, you're
(42:13):
having some time to just reflect because I know, I'm
sure you're going to go to some tour dates, but
that's that's a whole other thing, because I'm sure you
want to go to as many shows as you can
and be a supportive partner and all that, but at
the same time, I got to focus on you. So
this tour kind of it's really perfect how it's laid out.
(42:34):
So I've had like roughly this whole week without him, which,
like you know, in the moment when you're saying goodbye,
you're so sad and you're like, oh my god, I'm
gonna miss you just since makes the heart grow fonder,
though exactly, it is so important to have that balance,
and so I have been high key loving and vibing. Yes,
having the house to myself, been loving it, just like
(42:57):
even in terms of like choosing, Wow, what breakfast I
want to eat? Choosing will show you want to watch?
We'll show I want to watch, what time I want
to walk the dog, you know, all these little things
that usually are very communal decisions for us. Um So
that has been really fun. And then next week I'm
flying to Chicago for the Chicago Show since my parents
(43:17):
lived there, and then after that I have another week
to myself, which I'm excited about as well. It's like
the perfect amount of like, yeah, what has it been
like having such a public relationship. So that's a that's
a beast in itself, I know, it really is. And
I truly feel like we got so lucky with each
(43:37):
other because we were kind of we're talking about this
the other day and saying, like, it's pretty wild that
we are both are feeling about like being public about dating,
Like we're so happy that we're on the same page
with it. Um, you know, because we have certain friends
(43:58):
that are in relationships and you just like didn't even
tell online, which is which is totally fine because it's
up to personal preference. And I just I think we're
both like thank God that we are in a great,
healthy place. And I think at this point too, it's
like the relationship always comes first. I think that's really
(44:20):
really important because we recognize like how many life changes
we've made together in terms of like you know, buying
this house together and having mortgage that we're splitting, and
like having a dog. We were literally like talking about
it on FaceTime. It is very adult of us. It's
very sexy, and it's so bad. Um. We were talking
(44:43):
about him FaceTime last night. I was like showing him
Peaches and I was like, I was like, ah um,
what did I say? I was like, funny that we
can never break up for Peach's sake. She deserves better,
and he's like, You're absolutely right. It's it's all about Peaches.
It's a child. And so I think it's like the
way to do it is just to always know that,
like it's always the relationship first. And there are definitely
(45:08):
times with posting online where sometimes they can feel like,
oh gosh, are we like posting too much? Like sometimes
we'll look at our feets and we're like, is there
too much couple ee happening on here? Because we often
will have feelings about some couples that share so much
and we're like, oh my god, this is too much.
This is out of control. They need to stopping so gushy.
And then we're like, wait, but let's I feel like
for three years in yeah, you tell me, you guys
(45:31):
post a solid amount, not too much. Not I think
it's a fair amount. Okay, very sweet, thank you. But
I also think like whatever you want, you know what
I mean, Like you shouldn't not because if you don't
want to, so true, Yeah, take a cute photo post
it's your feet because at the end, at the end
of the day, yeah, and he's he's like he's also
(45:52):
like my best friend. I spent every day with him,
and so of course I just have more photos with
him than like anyone else's your life partner. I'm like,
I like cute in this photo, so like it's going
to pop the think you broke up if you cropped
it out to be like what is happening exactly? Um,
but I think, I guess the other fun thing about
(46:12):
being public is that like there's never any room for
anyone to like pry too much in terms of like
anyone being like, so, what's going on? Because he wasn't
in your last video, you know, like it's I don't know,
there's something nice about being like we're we're mom and
dad of the internet, and everything's great and here we are,
and um, I like, at the end of the day,
(46:34):
I just feel so grateful that he is so comfortable
being in my YouTube videos like that that truly like
I could never force upon someone or change someone in
order to tow I guess like not fit that role,
but just like to be comfortable with it, and like
he genuinely is all that. He's always like you should
(46:56):
be blogging this. This is hilarious. Go get your camera.
You know it's it feels it's so we love a
supportive boyfriend who is down for it. I love that.
We love that exactly and encourages. We love a boyfriend
who supports an independent woman. That's what we all need.
It is really sweet to know that, Like I I'm
(47:18):
never feeling like I am like dampening the moment or
pestering by like asking to film something because I think
at the day, end of the day, like he also
recognizes how many like memories were documenting and that's really sweet.
And like when when we're spending time apart, you know,
he's like telling me about how he's watching our old
like Coachella vlog and and just like reminiscing on the
(47:41):
days and so it's just really sweet. And then it's like,
you know, fingers crossed, we get married and have kids
eventually one day and like Manifest and Manifest Manifest, we
get to show our kids like footage of us looking
young and hot when you started day we could see
the journey. I know, Like that's that's such a gift
(48:04):
you're gonna be able to give that, Like that's awesome.
My biggest beer is like having a child that is
like so uninterested in it. Like I'm gonna be like,
if you want to see what your mom was like
from thirteen to you know whatever age, it is all
there and they're going to be like absolutely not. Why
would I At one point they'd have to be. I
don't know how you wouldn't be interested in that, right,
(48:26):
I mean, like, you guys are having a pretty awesome,
incredible life, but I'm sure something that's so important is
to stay grounded, which is something that I feel like
we all need to do more and feel centered with.
Do you meditate? Oh my gosh, I have been on
a meditation kick as of lately. I literally meditated right
before this. Actually, I'm meditate you this morning for the
(48:48):
first time. You're like reading my mind. Oh my god?
Did you like it? Did you guided? Did you? What
do you do? I did a five minute YouTube good
morning thing. I kind of fell asleep to it though. Amazing. No,
that is honestly, that's so wonderful to hear, because I
feel like if you go in too hard and too long,
like you will not find it. Not sustainable. No, it
(49:11):
is not sustainable, and it is such a It's the
same as working out, truly, it's like working out for
your mind. And like I feel that when I'm in
a really good, uh whatever like rhythm with meditation, like
it's easier for me to clear the mind because it's
all about like just letting thoughts kind of like subside
(49:31):
and allowing them to just come and go. But when
you first start, you're like all I can think about
is what I have to do once I finished this meditation,
and I have to send this text message and I
have to do this, and then oh my god, I
have to pick this up. So it's one of those
things where like I have not found the answer to it.
I have not found what works best just yet, because
I'm constantly like trying different apps. It's a journey. It's
(49:54):
a journey. Uh. The meditation I listened to just before
this was by Louise hey Um. She was an author.
She wrote the book You Can Heal Your Life, but
you may have heard of. It's like a self helpy book.
It's a feel good, feel good type of book. But
her voice is really she's like all about self affirmations,
which honestly, they make me feel good. So like it's
(50:18):
like what they're meant to do, so they're doing their
job exactly, and so it's like a it's kind of
a long one. It's like a twenty four minute meditation.
That's impressive that you can do that, but it's guided.
She's like talking the whole time, so you're just kind
of laying there and like feeling good is She's like
sweetly speaking in your ears. Um this silent ones. I cannot.
(50:41):
I can't do those yet, Claudia. I am so happy
that you can have my podcast. This was so much fun.
When I Love my Dad comes out, we got to
do a part two and yes can come to Yes
you can talk about all the movie we can talk
about when it's out and more beautiful. This conversation meant
so much, So thank you so much taking the time. Oh,
(51:03):
it was so wonderful meeting you. This was so sweet.
I truly feel like there's there's clearly just like so
much we can relate on and we just like met
in the middle and we're like I see you, you
see me? And do you know it's real when you
can make a connection on zoom, I know that's rare. Seriously, Well,
thank you so much for making my day literally this
(51:24):
was so much fun, goodness and I will be back,
aren't you coming soon? Ladies and Gen's amazing. Thank you
guys so much for taking the time out of your
day to listen to this week's episode. Up the Let's
Were a podcast. If you want subscribe follow, leave a comment.
I always love to hear your feedback on episodes. Claudia,
(51:45):
thank you so much for coming on. This conversation was
so refreshing and I genuinely loved it. And if you want,
follow me on Instagram at it Sammy J. That's I
T S S A M M Y J A y E.
And I will see you guys next week. It's another episode.
I'll see you later.
Hi guys, and welcome back to this week's episode of
a Let's Be Real podcast. I'm your host, Sammy J.
And welcome. This week, I got to chat with the
incredible Claudia Seluski. She is a YouTube o G. She's
been on the platform for eleven years. She's done everything
from vlogs to lifestyle. She's also done some amazing collaborations
(00:22):
and her newest venture is starring and I Love My Dad,
which is a movie that just wrapped production a few
months ago and it hasn't come out, but we talked
all about that, having a healthy balance with social media, therapy, anxiety, journaling, life,
her relationship with Phineas, and so much more. I hope
you guys like this week's episode. Claudia, I'm so thrilled
(00:50):
that you're in my podcast. First of all, I just
realized this is like the first time a couple is
coming on because we had Phineas in season one and
now you're here in season three. I know, that's awesome.
I feel like we need to then have a reunion
where we're all together, the three of us on the
same conversation. Yeah, we should. And you know what I've
(01:10):
been I've watched your videos. I sink like five years now,
so I love your channel. I love the way you
edit um and you've been on social media for so
many years, and I know you can relate to this.
Being on social media at any age can be difficult
with everything that it's surrounded by. What has it been
like being on social media for so long, but also
trying to keep like the same mental health. What's interesting,
(01:34):
I think is social media changes so much. I feel
like it kind of didn't really exist when I first
started making YouTube videos, so I guess thinking about what
my headspace was and where I thought this was all
going when it first started versus now is so different
because when I started YouTube, I'm not sure Instagram really
(01:57):
existed yet or it had just come into play. TikTok
didn't exist, and it felt like I think the shift
was like I treated social media as this thing where
I'm putting these things out and I am editing cute
videos and having so much fun in the creation process
and dumping it somewhere, and now social media has become
(02:20):
this like bigger beast where you're creating, you are also
you know, watching and taking in other people's content, and
you're also communicating. I was talking about this with my
friend the other day, how like we feel that social
media breaks are really healthy, right, just just getting off
Instagram for a few days or whatever. But now there's
this component where like I have so many people in
(02:42):
my life that I only DM and that's like our
source of communication. Interesting, so then what do you do?
It's like the new text message, it really is. I
So I just started college, and something I'm realizing is
everyone they don't ask for your number. They only ask
for your snapchat, which is so odd to me because
I just deleted snaptrat Instagram. By the way, I didn't
(03:04):
delete my accounts. I was just like, I need a break.
But like it goes to show the people that actually
care about you will text you definitely, and the people
that don't really you know, have an interest, will just
send you random photos and won't even have a conversation.
It's just it's odd. There is definitely like a difference
in the platforms. I feel with d m NG exactly
(03:26):
what you're saying, it's like sharing a photo or commenting
on something or just giving it a heart, while text
messaging now is like this commitment where if you've made
a friend on social media and you exchange numbers, You're like, oh,
we're going there. It's like a true friendship. And then
if you go to FaceTime, Oh my goodness, a hundred percent.
Are you a big facetimer? Do you FaceTime friends every day?
(03:47):
You know? I think so, because I forget. There's just
something about it that forces me to be more present,
because when I'm on the phone and I'm doing something,
I can so easily be distracted. When I'm looking in
someone else's face, It's just more personal and I like
talking to faces instead of just like audio, if that
makes any sense, What about you? I totally agree. I'm
(04:08):
such a fan of FaceTime. Phineas is on tour right now,
so we are constantly facetiming all the time. Although the
feature of being able to swipe away and still have
the little person, you know, the little bugs, but it's
on pause? Is it on pause now? Or can you
think it is? Because sometimes I'm looking at his face
and I'm like, you are not, you are not looking,
(04:29):
You're not, you are not you are reading a text messager.
So it's when that eye glances Yeah, exactly exactly. Um,
but I totally agree. I think FaceTime is like the
optimal prime communication experience. Um. And it's like the closest
to real life, which is great. And also like I
mean truly, I feel like I learned this throughout COVID,
(04:50):
but like everyone is a FaceTime away, and it's crazy
how connected you can feel after even just like a
ten minute conversation. It's one button away, put that on
a shirt. Um. So we love it for that reason.
But to jump back to like social media and kind
of maintaining sanity, right and all of that, and I
(05:11):
think we are just like living in a world where
we are all sharing our lives, whether you are an influencer, creator, actor,
you know, whatever is bringing you to social media, or
if you just mostly like a watch or a listener
exactly all these things. Um, I don't know, it's tricky.
I was thinking about this recently about like the contrast
(05:33):
of like I feel like sometimes we post to feel
seen or for people to see that we are busy,
we are doing things, or Hi, look I'm happy and
I yeah, it's to prove something, yeah, And it's like
and then there's another version where you know, you you
have a photo that makes you really happy or you
are documenting a memory and you want to share it,
(05:55):
and that's the really pure side of it. It is
such a double edged sword, and I feel like every
single day is sort of like a little bit different,
And um, I think I fall in both categories. I
think we all do. And yeah, so I don't know
what the answer is. I'm still figuring that out. I
think everybody is. But it's hard to when you want
(06:17):
to post something, but then it's so easy to get
caught up in the oh my goodness, this didn't get
any likes. Oh my goodness, I had to delete this.
Turn off your legs, That's what I did. And you
just post what you want to post. That's what I say.
That's what I'm trying to the place I'm trying to
get to. Have you seen the social Yes, I turned
(06:38):
off my Instagram and Snapchat notifications since I've watched it,
and I don't have them on anymore, and I only
have my like, Gmail and text and that's it. Amazing.
Same here. I the notification setting that I had on
before watching that was like anyone who I follow, if
they comment or like anything, I would see all of it.
And I just like, do not need to know what
(06:59):
time someone is liking something like if I am really
that curious, I can go to the photo and I
can click on view more under the likes and like, see,
oh cool, cool cool. I don't need to see the
moment it's happening, you know, So same here. I'm glad
that we're all going through that because I feel like
it's one of those things where I've noticed, just in
(07:20):
the short time I've been at college, just how much
time everybody is on their phones, including me. So I'm
trying to cut back. I'm really in a space right
now where I'm trying to be the best version of myself,
where I'm trying to grow. And something I love about
your channel is you're documenting your whole process. Um, I
know you've gone into journal journaling, and I'm really trying
(07:42):
to get into it. What are your tips because I
have trouble like it's not doing, it's starting to do.
It's like sitting down designating the time. Does it really help?
Would you say? Okay? I love it? And honestly, it's
one of those if you're looking at it as like
a form of therapy, it is something that can it
(08:04):
can make you feel different ways, like I think it is. Um,
it's like untruthful to be like it's going to make
you feel amazing all the time, because sometimes like the
times when I really need a journal or when I'm
at a low point and and then journaling it like
makes me sadder. But there at the end of the day,
(08:24):
I just like love recording and writing down like where
I'm at, you know, on a specific day or in
a specific moment, because I love looking back. I mean,
I think that's like partially why I've made my YouTube
channel so personal and and very vlog styles because I
just love like being able to record these memories. You
can see your growth as a human, which is awesome.
(08:46):
That's crazy. It is very trippy to go back on
videos and see like what I was interested in reading
and what I'm talking about and the way that I'm speaking, Like,
I don't know, we just like change and evolve in
so many different ways. But I think with journal this
is what I'll say, um, and I'm like trying to
do this to myself or for myself with reading right now,
which is like give yourself smaller hills to climb. So like,
(09:12):
journaling can definitely feel very intimidating. What do you write
about how many pages. Like people talk about like do
morning pages three pages a day. I rarely am journaling
three pages a day. That is only if I'm like
on one, I'm like caffeine's running through the veins. I'm like, yeah,
I got so much right. But I think like giving
yourself um, just like literally the shortest, smallest prompts of
(09:36):
like one of my favorite things to do is, um,
let's say it's like at the start of a week,
I'll just write, I'll write the date, and I'll write
like more of, less of, and I'll just write more
of and then just list things that like have brought
me joy or things that I want to do more
and then just like less of things that haven't brought
me joy, you know, less of staying up too late,
(09:57):
less of you know, whatever it is people pleasing I
don't know like, And I think giving yourself like a
few questions like that gives you that format of like
because sometimes it's you're just like, I don't know what
to write, and other times I just make a list
of things that I'm like grateful for, and that puts
me in a that is definitely like the most rewarding
(10:20):
I think in the moment, because being grateful, is it
really just kind of like put things into perspective. Yeah, yeah, totally.
So I think start like give yourself no expectations on
like writing pages and pages and pages. That is not
what it is. I use my journal to write like
list to do list, like literally anything. Sometimes I draw,
(10:41):
and I think that's what it's fun, is like dedicating
a journal to literally dumping whatever you want in it.
I think also like my like perfectionism wants me to
like stay in theme with what I am writing, and
I'm like, okay, well right, You're like, well, if I'm
going to draw on this journal, then I'm gonna have
a separate journal for the draw. And it's like you
(11:03):
just have to release that and be like like I
literally have my drawl right here. I'm like, this girly
has everything in it. And the way that I organize
it in my brain is I'm like, this is my girly.
Love that, and she stays with me and I write
whatever I want in it. And I think releasing that
sort of feeling of like needing to organize really kind
(11:24):
of like sets you for you a little bit, I know,
And I think I honestly think we have a lot
in common because I know you did a whole video
about being in a funk, and girl, do I relate
to that because I don't know if it's a combination
of just like being in a pandemic for a year
and a half or like just growing as a human.
But you want to better yourself, but sometimes like I
(11:44):
saw your video and I related to it and just
like I feel like I want to get a bunch done,
but then I don't. I feel worse if I don't. Yeah,
I mean that all falls into like giving yourself the
smaller like hills to climb. I think, Um, I don't know,
it's really tricky, Like I'm I'm personally coming into understanding
(12:06):
that I for so long have like based my value
and worth on my productivity. Um, I don't know where
that came into play with my childhood, but that's certainly
where I found most worth. And I'm like kind of
re um, I don't know, I'm like trying to rewire
in myself and be like no, no, no, that's so
incredible though that you're doing that. Yeah, And it's I
(12:30):
think we're just like in this time of life where
like hustle culture is just like very you know, it's
seen as like that you are you are killing it,
if you are busy, if you are productive, if you're
doing a million things. But I think like finding joy
and just like doing things for yourself and just letting
(12:52):
yourself relax, like that's really important, and I for so
long would feel so guilty about it, or like if
I have slower periods in life, I'm like, oh my gosh,
I'm not doing enough. Oh my gosh. And it's like
always just like remembering to give yourself the perspective of
just like if things are feeling slower or if things
are feeling less chaotic, like eventually things will pick back
(13:13):
up for a season of life and you will look
back and be like, oh my gosh, I had all
the time to like get into all those books I
told myself I was going to read. I had all
the time to like focus on, uh, doing hikes or
like whatever. I think. It's just it's like so perspective
and that's what I'm telling myself. And I think we're
all experiencing a lot of that, definitely through COVID. I
(13:35):
think like COVID forced a lot of us to look
inward and now that we're in this like in between
where things are opening back up and we're like re
establishing our relationship to like balancing life. Yeah exactly. Um,
Like I personally have been like going really crazy on
like socializing. I'm trying to get I think I'm trying
(13:57):
to repay all the lost time. And you know that's
tricky too, because sometimes you just need it yourself. It's
listening to like your body and what you need, which
it can be really hard. And I think social media
exacerbates the household culture because you see everybody coming out
with a new line or new this or knew then
it's like, you know, sometimes you just need time for
(14:19):
yourself to grow. And that's just as productive I feel like.
And that's to be reminded of a And I think also,
like back to what I was saying about, like feeling
the need to post on social media to feel seen
by others. It's like, at the end of the day,
if you are not genuinely happy and feeling just present
(14:41):
and grateful and fulfilled in all those things, like that
is where the source should be coming from. Those are
the questions for yourself to be answering for yourself, not
for others, you know what I mean. Absolutely, I'm a
big proponent of therapy. I've been in therapy since I
was like on and off there was like eight that's amazing,
and I am so grateful for that because I've learned
(15:03):
so much about myself and how I grow. You talked
about the therapy where you put these like electros on
your Can you please tell me more about this cause
I'm very curious. I literally just came home from an appointment,
like I just had it done this morning. Okay, wait,
please explain. So Okay, So it's called neurofeedback, and it
(15:24):
is something that like is becoming more widely known, but
I certainly I have never heard of it, and it's
sort of you hear it and you're like this little
life hack, like this sounds like kind of life hack
right here? It really does, it really does. So I
got introduced to it through Phineas because his therapist like
specializes in it. But there's I guess there are therapists
(15:47):
all around that do it. Like it's definitely becoming more
and more popular. But basically neuro feedback, there's like two
stages of it. The first one is they're like taking
all these little electro things and sticking them all around
your head because like basically you're different parts of your
brain obviously are in different locations, and so she kind
(16:09):
of she's very specific about where she puts everything, because
every part has a different purpose. And the first thing
that she does, I'm saying she because his therapists woman,
and she UM essentially like sends off a very low frequency.
And at first I was like, this is us. This
is scary. This does not sound uh safe, but it's
(16:31):
actually like the amount of UM doesn't our computers exactly exactly,
and like so the wavelengths that it's sending are so
low they are like I forgot the the actual number,
but it is the smallest fraction of what like literally
these headphones are emitting or a cell phone, and it's
(16:52):
so low that your brain is able to pick up
and read on it because all the other devices around
us are so high that our brain is like no, no no, no,
we're not at that speed, so we don't care about that.
So it's low enough for your brain to actually interact
with the waves. And so like the first the first
few sessions of it, she's like emitting a very low
frequency just to see what the brain is sending off,
(17:14):
and so it catches the size of the wavelengths and
the speed, which basically shows, um, how how developed you
are in those areas, and then how hard you're working
in those areas. And so you're like fully having a
graph displayed in front of you showing you what areas
of your brain are least developed. And so in that case,
(17:34):
it would be like suppression. Um so where like your
brain has decided, oh, I don't really need to develop
this area. So for me, like just sort of with
my childhood and my environment, like, for example, my emotional
suppression is like the smallest little sliver because at some
point in my formative years I told myself, I don't
(17:55):
I need to take after others and not be so
concerned with my emotions. My emotions don't matter, and so
my emotional suppression is like this tiny little sliver and
it's it's wild to see it. It's validating, but it's
also like, yeah, validates everything you think. It totally does.
And it's interesting because then like the analytical and critical
(18:17):
side of my brain was like super super high. If anything,
it was like hypo suppressed, which was like over the standard,
so it was like blue. Everything else is like super
Origin small, super blue. So um. Basically, she explained like, oh,
you are doing a lot of your emotional processing through
the critical side of your brain, because you're essentially telling
yourself how you should be feeling about things. And I
(18:39):
was like, yes, I do that. I'm always talking myself
into how I should be feeling about things. So once
she does all of that, you like learn all of it.
And now I'm in this process where she's starting to
tweak the frequencies because essentially, like there is a healthy
frequency at which your brain should be operating at and um.
(18:59):
Essentially like she sends it off and then your brain
listens to that and it decides like, oh I like
this more, so I'm gonna I'm gonna match this. And eventually,
if you do it enough, your brain will learn like,
oh I really like this this speed and I like
this wavelength. And so what it's eventually supposed to do
(19:20):
is just sort of like help rewire your brain and
help remind your brain that it doesn't need to suppress
these different areas. And what's crazy about it too, is
like it has helped cure so many different conditions and diseases,
Like she's had patients that can hear better, or like, um,
someone used to one of her patients like used to
(19:42):
know Chinese and like completely forgot it because she blacked
out her childhood and then one day she woke up
and like remembered the entire language. It's like, I can
speak Chinese again. So it's like kind of going into
your subconscious a little bit. Yeah, Like it's it definitely.
It's not like creating any superpowers for you, but if
there's anything that your brain has chosen to hold back,
(20:03):
like it can help open that door again and be
like hey, it's okay to you know, like access this again.
It's really crazy. And so it's it's like helped people
with memory or yeah, any hearing loss or like site, Um,
I have really bad um like selective hearing. And I'm
that's the thing that I am hoping. Like sometimes like
(20:25):
Phineas and I will just be hanging out and we'll
be having a full bown conversation. In the middle of
the sentence, I'm like, oh my god, I have no
idea what he's talking about. I don't know what what
why that's happening. But I that is the thing that
I'm hoping that I can relate to that because so
I have my learning disabilities processing, so I have dealt
without my entire life. So I feel you on that.
(20:45):
Oh my gosh. It's very frustrating because I'm often having
to ask people to repeat themselves. And it's not that
you're not listening. It's just that your brain genuinely can't
take in the information and process it. But it's like
you here be you can't process it, yes, all the time,
and like or I'll hear someone say a word and
I'm like and I'll be like, wait, did you just
(21:06):
say blah blah blah? And it isn't an English word
at all, and they're like, what how did you get
that from that? Like, I don't know. I feel you
on that. Okay, we have to take a quick break,
but when we come back, I want to talk about
your hobbies outside of acting in YouTube, what you love
about storytelling, your relationship with Phineas, and so much more.
We'll be right back and we're back. Something that I've like,
(21:38):
try to find his outlets to um turning shitty situations
into something art Like that's how this podcast came about
came out from my anxiety. Um so that's what I've
been trying to do. But do you have I know
you paint. I know you have a bunch of hobbies.
Is there a hobby during quarantine that you picked up?
Oh hobby that Oh my gosh. I feel like not
(22:02):
even specifically like painting creatively, but I did a lot
of like wall painting the COVID, Like I I decided
that I wanted to like paint my entire office and
painting an entire room wout as an individual, and also
(22:22):
like I think the reason why I didn't want to
hire anyone to do it because I was like, I
don't want to take the furniture out and like covering
and cover it all up like I can do it
wall by wall, and um I just like d I
Y queen a d I Y queen. And it was,
oh my gosh, it took so long, but also I
found like so much peace in it, like just when
(22:45):
you go all out and you get like the big
roller and like the pan and you're just like it's
also a workout too. So weirdly enough, I found myself
painting a lot of walls during COVID. I like also
painted my bathroom and now I'm thinking of painting our
master bathroom. I have like the paint can like sitting
there staring at me every day, and I'm like, what
if I just cracked it open? But if I just no, no, no,
(23:07):
I should hire someone. I should just hire someone. But
what if I just did it myself? Mean what you
should do? Then? While I was painting what I got
obsessed with Bob Ross for the pandemic, And of course
I watched his videos to call asleep. But if you
go to Bob Ross Incorporated his like website, you can
buy all his paints, his brushes, his canvases, everything. And
(23:28):
then what I would do is I'd watch Bob rossors
and paint with him. Huh. And I actually they came
out well, like really well, and you use his paints everything.
But I saw a YouTube video where a girl did
a Bob Ross painting on a wall, which could be
fun to do. I saw that, I know, oh my gosh,
that I wish I had the I think for me,
(23:52):
like I would just feel like that's that's too much
happening on one wall, Like I like things like so
clean and minimalistics, or I'll just get the Barbara us
like kit and paint girl. It's great that Yeah, that
is really that is like really really good information to know.
I feel like going into paint vers is very inating. Yeah,
(24:13):
because you're like acrylic versus oil, satin versus shine versus
matt and you're just like where do I begin? Yeah.
And also I'm a perfectionist, so like whenever I get
stressed about doing a painting, Bob Ross was like, there's
no mistakes, only happy accidents, and I was like, thanks, Bob.
He was really calming me down when I was painting. Wow,
(24:33):
I should really. I feel like I've never like dove
into that world, but do it. It's so clear. Yeah,
it's so clear that it's like only a low risk,
high reward like experience because they come out beautiful. And
I've seen like YouTubers do like, yeah, let me see
your let me see your paintings. I feel like I've
(24:54):
seen so many YouTubers like painting to Bob Ross and
it comes out almost exactly to what Keep in mind,
I'm not a painter. Okay, so this is without having
ever really painted. This is okay, So this was this
is for my senior thing. We were drawing on the sidewalk. Anyways,
I drew this was my first one I ever did.
It wasn't on the canvas boos that on this sidewalk.
(25:16):
If you can kind of see stunning the classic trees,
the classic and that was just with charcoal. That was
with charcoal. That's crazy. Bob ros is a great teacher. Wow.
So you were just like following everything but with charcoal.
Does he have charcoal tutorials? No? I was just kind
of figuring it out as I went because I need
(25:36):
something to like drive my brain. Sometimes I find it
very helpful. Oh my gosh. Well, I'm going to look
into his website. I mean, Bob Bars not sponsored, but
Bob Bras. I love you, we love you. Another weird
parallel we have is that you moved to l A
when you're eighteen. I just moved here from New York
and nineteen. And I know you used to do like
(25:57):
red carpet stuff for Team Vogue. I did that for
Radio Disney. So I feel like we have this weird
like similar like parallels happening, parallels happening definitely. And something
that I've always been really inspired by your videos is
just how driven you are in your work ethic and
just getting stuff done because what people don't realize is
(26:17):
they just see the finished product, but how much work
it takes into just creating a video. You know, it's
coming up with the concept, it's producing it, it's editing,
it's being in it. What is the process like to
stay so driven and not not loose sight of like
your end goal because it can be hard when you
see like fourteen year olds making millions of dollars from
(26:39):
just doing these dances on TikTok. Definitely, I think like
that was the evolution of YouTube that none of us
could really um anticipate for anyone that started way back
in the day. Because you're an o G. I feel
like and I feel like right around the time I
(27:00):
moved out was when we really started seeing like viral
videos were definitely a thing. Like I think that's like
what started YouTube, Like the man there was like a
video at the zoo or something like, but specifically like
the clickbait culture and like the explosions and like like
when all of that sort of came into play. I
(27:21):
think for me because when I when I started YouTube,
it came from such an authentic place of just like
this is so fun. For me, this is fascinating, Um,
I want to do this for fun. Like, I think
a huge part of me held onto that. I definitely
understood that it had become my job and I had
(27:43):
to there were responsibilities with that and taking it seriously,
but also like, yeah, I think when I started seeing
that shift, it never felt authentic and like sometimes honestly
look back and I'm like, damn, maybe I maybe I
should have jumped on like some of those trends right
just in terms of like the types of videos that
(28:03):
we're doing really well or everyone was collaborating, and I
was always like, that's not you exactly at the end
of the day, like it's so clear that I didn't
have interest in it, And looking back at it now,
I guess like I look at all my videos and like,
of course I'm younger, and so there's embarrassment in that,
but like, genuinely, I'm so proud of everything that I've made,
(28:24):
and I think like holding onto that, I guess like
integrity for for lack of a less dramatic word, it
it's like allowed me to be really proud of my
YouTube videos and be proud of the platform. And I
think that's helped to maintain this uh like healthy relationship
that I have with it now where it doesn't feel
(28:46):
like gimmicky or slimy or like any of these sorts
of things. You know, and like strictly from a viewer perspective,
it comes across because you can go through any of
your videos and you see the common theme, which is
just you. It's it's you could tell it's not trying
to be anybody else, and that's refreshing, especially in the
world where everything is so saturated with the exact same thing.
(29:08):
So I think it's so great what you're doing. What
do you love about storytelling? Oh? Um, the thing that
oh gosh, I mean honestly, like this is where I
geek out. I feel like I love every single different
component coming together. I feel that, I think because I
I really I really like I see myself as an
(29:31):
editor first, because I just love the editing process, because
I feel like that is like that is like the
moment where you're the chef in the kitchen and you're
like adding and piecing everything together, putting the story together exactly.
And I often I'll hear sometimes like I'll just go
through like different because we have to use world two
free music. I'll go through like world two free websites
(29:53):
or whatever SoundCloud and I will like find a song.
This was my process back in the day when I
made like a lot of look books where I'd find
a song and I did envision like what I could
see with it, and then shoot based on the song. Um. Nowadays,
because my content is more like just personal, I'll kind
of like cut everything together, find something that feels harmonious,
(30:15):
like with the footage, and then just like play around
from there and like cut to the beat and then
like give every every video a theme and all this stuff.
And now it's like getting into like acting more and
stuff Like I find myself like getting so excited about
that because it's like on this bigger scale with like
the project I just shot. I'd be like, you know,
(30:37):
you should really have like this sort of song with this,
and he's like, oh my god, you're so right and
so collaboration, you know what, as a YouTube as someone
who's been yes, you're doing everything alone, and that has
been like the most I just I love working with people.
It is really fun to allow yourself to like trust
others and work on one thing together because get off
(31:00):
each other totally, totally. It's so refreshing. I think like
that is definitely what's keeping me, I guess like motivated
these days and inspired and excited, because if you're yeah,
it sometimes can feel very like isolating, kind of bouncing
ideas only with yourself. Um, and I feel like I've
(31:23):
definitely sometimes I'm like, Okay, well, I could be sitting
down with friends and like brain storming videos together and stuff.
But I think when you're just so used to being
able to rely on yourself for so long, you get
stuck in that. So it's it's nice to be forced
to like collaborate and like work with the community of
people and stuff. And I'm very excited about this film.
(31:44):
I love my dad because thank you. First of all,
what people don't realize that I tried to spread I
have a bunch of friends or actors. Auditioning is the
full time job in itself, and then if you get
booked in my brain, but I feel like people, I
feel like I need to preface that because well, what
would you say your ratio it's per auditions? How many?
Oh my gosh, well okay, truly, I don't even know
(32:07):
what the ratio would be, but I can I can
confirm that I've been on like thousands of auditions. It
is so that whole process is so wild, and you really,
like I feel like in order to stay we're talking
about like the sanity of social media. Meanwhile, with auditions,
that is the bigger beast that I'm trying to tackle,
(32:30):
and I think it's like it's really I feel very
fortunate in the fact that, like, I have many different
things going on, and so I try every time I
go into an audition for room or if I'm prepping
for like a self tape, just reminding myself to have fun.
I think it is so easy to sense that in
(32:52):
a room, and I genuinely feel like the projects that
I have booked were the projects that I've gone like
super far along the process, are the ones where I'm like,
I'm just gonna have fun. I'm never going to get this,
you know. And having that approach really helps with the
constant rejection because that is just the industry that it is,
(33:12):
and there are so many people going out for the
same role, and there are so many factors that are
like outside of yourself, that are not in your control,
so not about you, and it's so hard to realize
that too, I know a hundred percent. And it's like,
so it's it's tricky, It's yeah, there are lots of
auditions all the time, lots of many many many, um
(33:35):
and and yeah that is just a part of it
and accepting that and just being game. I think also,
like you know, we're talking about how perspective is everything.
I think too for anyone that is like trying to
get into acting and um, wanting to take it seriously
and everything. I think also like looking at every audition
as an opportunity to show face in front of a
(33:56):
new casting director or like I just meeting people if
a thing a hundred percent, and I think like things
always come full circle. There have been so many moments
where like there's a project that I that I've recently
been attached to, I can't realize anything about it because
I'm like crossing my fingers that it happens. But they
(34:16):
will manifest manifest. But they had seen like older tapes
of mind that furroles I never booked, but they were like,
I loved your tape for this specific thing, and and
that's how we knew you were the right person for that.
And so you just never know where your efforts are
like really going to come back in your direction, you know,
and it's it's really hard to feel like you're at
(34:38):
least I feel this way where like you're behind. Yeah.
So we had Wayne Brady on he was that he
kicked off the season three and he said, um, you're
right where you're supposed to be. You're not ahead of anyone,
You're not behind. And that's something that I'm constantly having
to tell myself because it's so eat. We're in a
world where it's so easy to compare yourself and especially
(34:59):
with social immediate and I think if we all just
realize that we're all on our own path, there's room
for everybody. Yep, there shouldn't be any competition because we're
all on our own journey. And also to add to that,
like don't compare your chapter one to someone's like chapter twenty.
I think like, especially in the beginning, I used to
(35:21):
totally look up to like different actresses and think like,
oh my gosh, I wish I was booking these sorts
of roles and stuff. And then I look back at
it and I'm like, they've been acting since they were five,
and I have been acting for only five years, you know,
and and remembering that as well, that it's like a dent.
Everyone is on their own path. Everyone is on a
different part, in a different chapter of their journey. And like,
(35:44):
I think you're totally right that there's room for everyone.
I just in terms of like content opportunities, platforms, mediums,
like we are at a time where there is so
much of it, truly, and um, I think that it's great.
It's very very fruitful and I and it's really encouraging
(36:05):
because there's, yeah, there's just like so much happening. Okay, Claudia,
we have to take one more quick break, but when
we come back, I want to talk to about the
difference between working alone, like creating YouTube content versus being
in a movie and working with production teams and having
that collaborative process Phineas and so much more. While we're
(36:25):
right back and we're back, we're also living in a
world where instant gratification is everything. Post you get the
instant gratification of likes, but when you're working on a
movie or developing these projects that won't see the light
of day for a long time, oh my gosh, you
(36:47):
really have to like practice patients a what has that
been like for you because you can just post a
video and then get that instant gratification. But I love,
I Love My Dad doesn't even have a set release
date yet, I know it is. Yeah, that is one
of you know what I think, Um, I think having
(37:07):
patience for those things. And I often feel like the
things that take the most time like they're taking the
most time for a reason. I mean, of course, like
a YouTube video versus a feature film very different, and
I think it's just a little bit different. Um, And
I think like it just it's a sign of like
(37:28):
how precious it helps. It's exciting, like just having this
build up because it's it's helping me just like continue
to appreciate the opportunity and what it is and and
hopefully what it becomes and what people's reaction will will
be to it. And I feel like, like, don't you
sort of feel like in terms of the immediate gratification.
(37:51):
So there's like posting a photo maybe one of the
easiest things you can really do right, and you get
it immediately, and then it's like a YouTube video or
a pot cast episode, there's like a little bit more
time and there's a little bit more time into the
editing and then the release of it and then okay, great,
now it's here, and it's like, so I don't know,
I feel like the things that take a long time, Um,
(38:11):
it's instant gratification kind of goes away because you're kind
of like okay and just put it out, Like that's
how I feel at this point. Yeah, and totally and
like also, don't you feel like with the things that
do give you immediate gratification you get over it sooner
because you got it so fast, you know, you're like
all right, onto the next That's a really good point, Claudia,
because I'm thinking about it, and I got the most satisfaction.
(38:34):
The most satisfaction was when we launched season one because
that was the most length of time it took. My goodness,
I haven't thought of that. It's sort of like works
both ways, like it'll it takes the most time leading
up to it and then like just keeps you so
fulfilled and like grateful for it also just continuing on
past its life, you know, like like an album for example, right,
(38:56):
like it'll take a couple of years to produce, but
then the shell life is years and years, if not decades,
which is so great with that. Yeah, what would you say,
the best piece of advice you've received, Oh, the best
piece of advice I've ever received. Um, I think like
the reoccurring theme that I'm having for myself right now,
(39:19):
or like what I'm reminding myself. And I definitely hurt somewhere.
I don't know by who, but it's like, at the
end of the day, all you have is you, like you,
You are there when you are born, you are there
every single day with yourself. You are there to the
end of your days. And I think, like that's really
important because I find that I like often lose myself
(39:41):
in my environment and my surroundings, like whoever I'm talking
to or you know, my relationship or my friendships, like
I often give so much of I'm a big people
pleaser and I'm working on it and it's gotten way better. Girl.
I feel that. See, I knew we had a lot
in comment. I just knew it. I know we're like
(40:02):
unveiling all the onions. Layers are unpeeling, I know, and
I so I just feel that I often lose myself
and sort of give up all these self sacrifices in
order to make sure everyone around me is comfortable and
like that is definitely a great quality to have, but
knowing where your limit is, um, it's really important. Like
(40:25):
my therapist, Uh, this is like a few months ago,
but it just hit me so hard. I one time
like flipped a question to her and I was like,
if you're stuck in a position where you know you're
going to disappoint someone or you can just sort of
disappoint yourself by like you know, pleasing them, Like, are
you always choosing to disappoint the other person? And she
was like, and I was like really like even like
(40:49):
I know, I'm like, but what if it's like a
really big deal for the person, Like it, let's say
it's their birthday or whatever, and you just don't have
a lot of energy, But it's fine, you can suck
it up, and you can. And she's like, if you
keep this pointing yourself, eventually you will just disappoint everyone.
And that's stuck with me because rights like if you
keep just giving and giving your time and your energy,
(41:11):
if you don't give yourself the time to like fuel
up and and have be full enough to be able
to give, Like there's a big difference between giving and pleasing.
Pleasing is like an I lose you in situation because
I am taking from essentially like just there's nothing of me,
(41:32):
Like I am just taking pieces of me because there
is nothing extra in there too. And then on the
other side of it, giving is like when you have
enough to share, and it's an eye win you in situation.
And so I think that is really important, Like our
relationship with ourselves and what we're saying to ourselves literally
(41:52):
like affects the way that we are seeing everything and
like interpreting everything a hundred per scent. And I think that, like,
I think that is my answer, my very long answer
to your question, because it impacts like every aspect of life.
Would you say, now that Phineas is on tour, you're
(42:13):
having some time to just reflect because I know, I'm
sure you're going to go to some tour dates, but
that's that's a whole other thing, because I'm sure you
want to go to as many shows as you can
and be a supportive partner and all that, but at
the same time, I got to focus on you. So
this tour kind of it's really perfect how it's laid out.
(42:34):
So I've had like roughly this whole week without him, which,
like you know, in the moment when you're saying goodbye,
you're so sad and you're like, oh my god, I'm
gonna miss you just since makes the heart grow fonder,
though exactly, it is so important to have that balance,
and so I have been high key loving and vibing. Yes,
having the house to myself, been loving it, just like
(42:57):
even in terms of like choosing, Wow, what breakfast I
want to eat? Choosing will show you want to watch?
We'll show I want to watch, what time I want
to walk the dog, you know, all these little things
that usually are very communal decisions for us. Um So
that has been really fun. And then next week I'm
flying to Chicago for the Chicago Show since my parents
(43:17):
lived there, and then after that I have another week
to myself, which I'm excited about as well. It's like
the perfect amount of like, yeah, what has it been
like having such a public relationship. So that's a that's
a beast in itself, I know, it really is. And
I truly feel like we got so lucky with each
(43:37):
other because we were kind of we're talking about this
the other day and saying, like, it's pretty wild that
we are both are feeling about like being public about dating,
Like we're so happy that we're on the same page
with it. Um, you know, because we have certain friends
(43:58):
that are in relationships and you just like didn't even
tell online, which is which is totally fine because it's
up to personal preference. And I just I think we're
both like thank God that we are in a great,
healthy place. And I think at this point too, it's
like the relationship always comes first. I think that's really
(44:20):
really important because we recognize like how many life changes
we've made together in terms of like you know, buying
this house together and having mortgage that we're splitting, and
like having a dog. We were literally like talking about
it on FaceTime. It is very adult of us. It's
very sexy, and it's so bad. Um. We were talking
(44:43):
about him FaceTime last night. I was like showing him
Peaches and I was like, I was like, ah um,
what did I say? I was like, funny that we
can never break up for Peach's sake. She deserves better,
and he's like, You're absolutely right. It's it's all about Peaches.
It's a child. And so I think it's like the
way to do it is just to always know that,
like it's always the relationship first. And there are definitely
(45:08):
times with posting online where sometimes they can feel like,
oh gosh, are we like posting too much? Like sometimes
we'll look at our feets and we're like, is there
too much couple ee happening on here? Because we often
will have feelings about some couples that share so much
and we're like, oh my god, this is too much.
This is out of control. They need to stopping so gushy.
And then we're like, wait, but let's I feel like
for three years in yeah, you tell me, you guys
(45:31):
post a solid amount, not too much. Not I think
it's a fair amount. Okay, very sweet, thank you. But
I also think like whatever you want, you know what
I mean, Like you shouldn't not because if you don't
want to, so true, Yeah, take a cute photo post
it's your feet because at the end, at the end
of the day, yeah, and he's he's like he's also
(45:52):
like my best friend. I spent every day with him,
and so of course I just have more photos with
him than like anyone else's your life partner. I'm like,
I like cute in this photo, so like it's going
to pop the think you broke up if you cropped
it out to be like what is happening exactly? Um,
but I think, I guess the other fun thing about
(46:12):
being public is that like there's never any room for
anyone to like pry too much in terms of like
anyone being like, so, what's going on? Because he wasn't
in your last video, you know, like it's I don't know,
there's something nice about being like we're we're mom and
dad of the internet, and everything's great and here we are,
and um, I like, at the end of the day,
(46:34):
I just feel so grateful that he is so comfortable
being in my YouTube videos like that that truly like
I could never force upon someone or change someone in
order to tow I guess like not fit that role,
but just like to be comfortable with it, and like
he genuinely is all that. He's always like you should
(46:56):
be blogging this. This is hilarious. Go get your camera.
You know it's it feels it's so we love a
supportive boyfriend who is down for it. I love that.
We love that exactly and encourages. We love a boyfriend
who supports an independent woman. That's what we all need.
It is really sweet to know that, Like I I'm
(47:18):
never feeling like I am like dampening the moment or
pestering by like asking to film something because I think
at the day, end of the day, like he also
recognizes how many like memories were documenting and that's really sweet.
And like when when we're spending time apart, you know,
he's like telling me about how he's watching our old
like Coachella vlog and and just like reminiscing on the
(47:41):
days and so it's just really sweet. And then it's like,
you know, fingers crossed, we get married and have kids
eventually one day and like Manifest and Manifest Manifest, we
get to show our kids like footage of us looking
young and hot when you started day we could see
the journey. I know, Like that's that's such a gift
(48:04):
you're gonna be able to give that, Like that's awesome.
My biggest beer is like having a child that is
like so uninterested in it. Like I'm gonna be like,
if you want to see what your mom was like
from thirteen to you know whatever age, it is all
there and they're going to be like absolutely not. Why
would I At one point they'd have to be. I
don't know how you wouldn't be interested in that, right,
(48:26):
I mean, like, you guys are having a pretty awesome,
incredible life, but I'm sure something that's so important is
to stay grounded, which is something that I feel like
we all need to do more and feel centered with.
Do you meditate? Oh my gosh, I have been on
a meditation kick as of lately. I literally meditated right
before this. Actually, I'm meditate you this morning for the
(48:48):
first time. You're like reading my mind. Oh my god?
Did you like it? Did you guided? Did you? What
do you do? I did a five minute YouTube good
morning thing. I kind of fell asleep to it though. Amazing. No,
that is honestly, that's so wonderful to hear, because I
feel like if you go in too hard and too long,
like you will not find it. Not sustainable. No, it
(49:11):
is not sustainable, and it is such a It's the
same as working out, truly, it's like working out for
your mind. And like I feel that when I'm in
a really good, uh whatever like rhythm with meditation, like
it's easier for me to clear the mind because it's
all about like just letting thoughts kind of like subside
(49:31):
and allowing them to just come and go. But when
you first start, you're like all I can think about
is what I have to do once I finished this meditation,
and I have to send this text message and I
have to do this, and then oh my god, I
have to pick this up. So it's one of those
things where like I have not found the answer to it.
I have not found what works best just yet, because
I'm constantly like trying different apps. It's a journey. It's
(49:54):
a journey. Uh. The meditation I listened to just before
this was by Louise hey Um. She was an author.
She wrote the book You Can Heal Your Life, but
you may have heard of. It's like a self helpy book.
It's a feel good, feel good type of book. But
her voice is really she's like all about self affirmations,
which honestly, they make me feel good. So like it's
(50:18):
like what they're meant to do, so they're doing their
job exactly, and so it's like a it's kind of
a long one. It's like a twenty four minute meditation.
That's impressive that you can do that, but it's guided.
She's like talking the whole time, so you're just kind
of laying there and like feeling good is She's like
sweetly speaking in your ears. Um this silent ones. I cannot.
(50:41):
I can't do those yet, Claudia. I am so happy
that you can have my podcast. This was so much fun.
When I Love my Dad comes out, we got to
do a part two and yes can come to Yes
you can talk about all the movie we can talk
about when it's out and more beautiful. This conversation meant
so much, So thank you so much taking the time. Oh,
(51:03):
it was so wonderful meeting you. This was so sweet.
I truly feel like there's there's clearly just like so
much we can relate on and we just like met
in the middle and we're like I see you, you
see me? And do you know it's real when you
can make a connection on zoom, I know that's rare. Seriously, Well,
thank you so much for making my day literally this
(51:24):
was so much fun, goodness and I will be back,
aren't you coming soon? Ladies and Gen's amazing. Thank you
guys so much for taking the time out of your
day to listen to this week's episode. Up the Let's
Were a podcast. If you want subscribe follow, leave a comment.
I always love to hear your feedback on episodes. Claudia,
(51:45):
thank you so much for coming on. This conversation was
so refreshing and I genuinely loved it. And if you want,
follow me on Instagram at it Sammy J. That's I
T S S A M M Y J A y E.
And I will see you guys next week. It's another episode.
I'll see you later.
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