Motherhood Unmasked

Motherhood Unmasked

We all know it. Motherhood is not for the faint of heart. But I bet you feel faint—make that exhausted—from the demands to nurture your children, raise them to be responsible citizens, keep a clean home, work that job, be present, make time for you, make time for the family and time for hubby, all while pretending you’re confidently doing any of it! Why wrestle with mom guilt and secret overwhelm all while trying to prove you have it all together? Motherhood isn’t about carefully curated images on a social media feed or popularity with your kids. It’s a beautiful ride that’s also messy and full of opportunity to use your influence to change the trajectory of your family. But if you can’t get real about the childhood trauma keeping you from confidently showing up as the mom your children need, then you’ll suffocate under “the everything’s fine” mask. Hi, I’m Vanessa. And as a pediatrician, stay at home mom of three, and multi-trauma overcomer, I say—nope, not on my watch! If you’re raising children while carrying unresolved childhood wounds from traumatic experiences, including abuse, abandonment, and neglect and you struggle with expressing compassion, showing up with confidence, and connecting with your child, this podcast will inspire your own healing journey. And empower you to break the negative cycles threatening your family. Because no matter your childhood traumatic experiences, the hand that rocks the cradle impacts generations. And you have the right to decide what kind of impact. You have a legacy to change. And it starts with you believing that when it comes to you being the mother of your children; you are the woman for the job. So, tap in and join me for Motherhood Unmasked.

Episodes

November 15, 2022 11 mins

It's not just you, Mama Bare. Everybody has issues—even those who don't have the courage to admit it.

So don't you get free from old false narratives to get tied up in a new one.

Imposter Syndrome tried to label you, but you're on your healing. Removing all the masks.

So who's the imposter...

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No one likes to bleed all over people. And when you first start counseling and old wounds reopen, you may feel like you're doing just that.

So, except for your support circle, you hold back a lot.

But as your wounds heal, is there a way to serve from your scars? Does it make you an imposter? Does your story even matter?

...

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November 1, 2022 14 mins

Sometimes it’s all you can do to make it to and through your therapy session.

Having the presence of mind to take notes sounds like a luxury.

But as you heal, the time will come when you have the bandwidth to invest more of yourself in your recovery. And this episode is full of practical tips on how to do it.

 

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October 25, 2022 17 mins

There's no shortage of people ready to comment on your parenting skills.

But they don't know what you step over in your soul to show up as a mom.

They don't know the skeletons in your childhood trauma closet that you're battling in therapy. And they don't have to—as long as you have a squad who does.

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October 18, 2022 12 mins

We say stuff like, “They drive me crazy!” But the truth is the only reason they can, is because we allow it.

But ...

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October 11, 2022 10 mins

In the last episode, we talked about the reality that healing gets a little ugly before it gets better. And we covered the importance of acknowledging what therapy causes to rise to the surface without getting tripped up by it. 

Well, in this episode Vanessa's unpacking a key component we need to do just that. Are you up for a little R & R?

 

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October 4, 2022 13 mins

When you see a potter fashioning clay on the wheel, it’s not a pretty sight.

It’s a wet, splashy mess and that’s on top of the varying degrees of pressure needed to shape it into the potter’s vision. And that’s before it gets fi...

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September 27, 2022 9 mins

Healing from childhood trauma is not a 100 meter dash.

It's a marathon you run at the pace of grace. And in this episode, Vanessa talks about what trips you up on the way and how to avoid it.

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September 20, 2022 18 mins

After the last couple years, everyone could use some therapy.

But in this episode, Vanessa runs down a list of reasons why therapy is the game changer you need to live an abundant life.

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September 13, 2022 12 mins

Motherhood Unmasked is back for season 7 and in this episode Vanessa's uncovering the reason so many moms feel forced to fake it and how to show up authentically as you.

 

THE PODCAST

MOTHERHOOD UNMASKE...

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April 5, 2022 9 mins

Forgive has seven letters, but depending on your level of pain, it sounds like a four letter word!

Forgiving the person or people who abandoned, abused, or violated when you were most vulnerable sounds like asking the impossible.

And I get it. I lived it.

You feel like forgiveness validate...

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March 29, 2022 9 mins

Women talk about glass ceilings in the corporate space, but for those who experienced childhood trauma, there’s another kind.

The ceiling that says what your mother was like is all you’ll ever be as a mom.

If your mom was awesome, you may be happy to be half the mother she was.

But if your...

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March 22, 2022 10 mins

If the thought of writing your thoughts and feelings in a journal sounds boring or worse frightening, in this episode, I talk about the benefits of journaling and the role it plays in maximizing your therapy sessions.

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March 15, 2022 8 mins

Trauma is traumatic. “Someone having it worse than you” doesn’t make your trauma less significant. And the fact that it happened as a child doesn’t mean it shouldn’t affect you now. So how do you respond to the pressure to “get over it?” Listen in.

 

 

THE PODCAST

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March 8, 2022 8 mins

When they say you can’t pick your family, it’s often about that embarrassing aunt or uncle or the cousin who asks to borrow money. 

But the truth is you can’t pick your children either and that’s the tricky part of parenting.
 
It’s a stretch to find the beauty in the uniqueness of each child, especi...

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March 1, 2022 7 mins

When you’re assaulted as a child and no one notices, much comes to your rescue, you learn to fend for yourself. Later in life, you may even doubt the sincerity of those who offer to help because well—once burned twice shy.

 

But if you’ve noticed, life is getting stranger and harder. And the reality that no one should do life alone is clearer than ever.

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February 22, 2022 7 mins
Perfectionism and people pleasing are not the same. They show up differently and in this episode, we’re talking about what psychologists refer to as the fourth kind of trauma response.
 
Which one are you: perfectionist or people pleaser? Cheers to getting free from all of it! Listen in🎙
 
 

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February 15, 2022 10 mins

Did you ever pinky swear when you were a little girl? That promise was binding like a mortgage. The only way out was death!

You pinky swore to hold someone accountable because you don’t have to be alive long to figure out people make promises they don’t keep—even to protect children.

So when you were mishandled and left to fen...

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February 8, 2022 9 mins
As I often say, “Misplaced expectation is the mother of all disappointment.” And when you’re the mother with the misguided expectation, your children pay the price. As a survivor of childhood trauma you likely paid it too.
 
I know what it’s like to be conditioned to believe I had to meet “the standard” in order to feel love and accepted...

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February 1, 2022 8 mins
Shame will tell you your existence is wrong because of however you believe you caused the abuse, the abandonment or the neglect.
 
And it will tell you you’re a horrible mother because you don’t show compassion and empathy as easily with your children as you do friends or strangers because you didn’t receive it in your home, growing up.<...

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