July 27, 2021 • 53 mins
The Jubal Show talks about dumb things said in Doctors' offices! A Phone Prank where Jubal Fresh is in love with his AirBnB guest! A War Of The Roses that has wine involved! English Evan goes up against Krist in Beat The Brit! Plus so much more!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Ladies and gentstic is the moment you've waited for. The
Jewels Show is here. Get your butt at the front door.
We are super villains ready to overtake the world, and
we're gonna do it in style. It's time for the
best ready ego you've heard in a while, The Jews Show.
(00:28):
One of two things is about to happen. It's the
Jewel Show that's happening right now. One of two things
is about to happen. Either you're gonna get really nostalgic
and cry a bunch, or you're gonna learn something right
now that will make you so cool that all your
friends will be jealous of you. Because the nineties nineties
stuff is very popular right now. Yeah, it was the
(00:49):
best decade. I feel like I like the nineties. I
grew up in the nineties. Alex Fresh grew up in
the nineties. English seven grew up whin I technically did.
I was born in ninety three, but I feel like
I was too young to experience it. Yeah, you still
haven't grown up. And we have a list of the
ten snacks from the nineties that you can still buy
on Amazon. Oh yeah, if you were a kid in
the nineties, or you really wish you were like most
people right now, you would have been munching on some
(01:11):
pretty amazing snacks and not all of the extincts. So
it's it's actually cool when you find something that you
thought was discontinued and realize that it still exists. So
here are some of the nostalgic snacks from the nineties
that you can still buy on Amazon. Dunk a Ruse,
Dunk Rush, the cookie things chocolate. It's like a dunk
(01:31):
and they're not good, that's right. I used to like
the commercials for those. I watched a lot of TV
as a kid. I was raised by the TV. They
did have good commercials, but it didn't work because I
didn't have a good tasting product. It sounds delicious, though,
a cookie dunking chocolate. I can't think of ever having
Dunk a Ruse text in four one six one. By
the way, what's your favorite nineties snack? They're still available
on Amazon. Se because your parents told you that you
were allergic to chocolate, that is true. My parents told
(01:53):
me that it was allergic to chocolate was lies and
never bought Dunk Ruse. So I never had chocolate because
if I had chocolate, I would go crazy and fight people.
Um airheads. Airheads are another one of you, yes, okay,
which I mean they were in the nineties, and so
it's weird that's on the list, right, So I think
Amazon made a list and put it out there on
(02:13):
the internet on the news sites to be like, these
are nineties snacks that you can buy right now, because
the nineties are like the hip popular thing right now, right,
and so all this stuff is available in stores. I
don't know much about candy and snacks, so I just
grabbed it. But there could be someone out there who's
thinking about the nineties when they were riding around on
their bike or skating around on their skateboard, listening to
(02:34):
some Tupac, probably Aggy or I think, like that's what
I grew up on. But I think other people that
I've heard, when they think of the nineties, they think
of um, Nirvana. Oh, like the Bronze music was big. Yeah,
I didn't listen to I never did either. I listened
to rapping, R and B, so I was a bit
more into rock. But okay, yeah, all right, these are
(02:55):
snacks that are still available on Amazon to buy and
also in stores apparently from the nineties. So we're now
we're just talking about ninety snacks, going like remember that?
So remember little hug fruit barrels. I don't, Oh gosh, yes,
it's those drinks. It's those fruit drinks that aren't like
the small barrels are clear and they come in all
the different rainbow colors, the little clear ones with like
the foil top. I never know what. I don't know
(03:17):
those ones. But you know what, what drink I loved
in the nineties? What because I always like I always
likes yeah, is it squeeze it where you squeeze it
and has like this like a skinny long one. It
looks like a coke bottle. Right, those are squeezes long.
So those are the barrels. I'm showing jewel to barrels.
I don't remember those things. I don't remember barrels, No,
my god, but I remember squeeze it's big time and
(03:40):
squeeze it's yeah. I've always like liquid snacks more than
cherie snacks, so I guess it means I like drinks.
But um, yeah, squeeze it's I love squeeze. It's oh
my god, always left like a weird taste. Like after
taste my mouth. Oh, I loved Squeeze. It has way
too much sugar. If you're doing that, that's probably why.
And the best thing about Squeeze it's for me. It
had a little plastic, like soft plastic tip that you
(04:01):
had to like twist off. Yeah, and I would chew
on that tip after too. I think every kid did.
I think. I think everybody I knew chewed on the
tip of the squeeze at too. But I was just
thinking about how soft, and yeah, it was actually a
good thing to chew on, and I did it every
single time. Yeah, it was. That conversation should definitely be
taken out context. Pop rocks, there are still around in
(04:22):
the nineties, are cool? Yes, just for the sensation in
my mouth. Oh, it's amazing. I just gave Jack's, my
nine year old son, pop rocks like two weeks ago
for the first time. What did he say? He thought
it was cool? Yeah. And another popular snack at him
from the nineties that you can still buy an Amazon.
This conversation could probably taken out of context. To gushers, Oh,
people loved gusts float in your mouth. Gushers, that's not okay,
(04:46):
And they're filled with like like yummy juice. Oh yeah,
I liked those nineties was all about sensations. The nineties
was all about things popping in your mouth. I no
wonder people like the nineties. Text in four one six one.
What's the favorite snack from the nineties you had that
popped in your mouth? And remember anything you missed on
the show. You're can always find it at the Jewils
Show on TikTok and Instagram, or you can follow all
(05:07):
of us individually. I met Jewel Fresh. My name is
spelled Juba l No. He never knows how to spell.
So there you go. Mine's at that Drea's Mind at
Evan on the radio, the Jebil Show on demand. It's
another jubile phone frame Mornings. That's twenties. Hello, Hey, todd Sparks,
(05:30):
put the spark back in your life. I was looking
for Crisp. Yeah. Hey, yeah, Chris, Chris. How are you
feeling great? Feeling good? I bet you are. This is
Todd Sparks, the motivational live coach that Hank set you
up with. Yeah, yeah, it's good to hear from you.
Its awesome. I'm excited. I'll tell you why. It's even
(05:51):
better to be talking to you, right. Have you checked
out my books by the way? Oh no, all right,
we'll do yourself a favor and pick one up now
that we're getting this whole thing started, todd Sparks Putting
the Spark Back in your Life. Second book follow up
that was todd Sparks spark Up another one, and third
installment was todd Sparks Sparking. Ain't easy, but it sure
is fun. I'm sure you've heard of me before. Actually
(06:15):
this was my first time. All right, all right, well,
I'm sure you've read some of my quotes on Instagram
or something like that. People are always posting them. But
it's a pleasure to meet you and make your acquaintance.
It's always good to meet a new lifetime friend. And
that's what we've just done. We've created a lifetime bond.
So tell me what is the thing? Okay, how about this?
(06:39):
I hope to keep off? All right? Wait, okay, they
may stop you right there, No bad dog, No hope.
It's not a strategy, sir. Hope is not a strategy.
When's the last time you won a game with hope?
I guess you're right, never right, never never, And you
know why never and you know why. Here's another todd
(06:59):
Sparks Barca wisdom I'm dishing out to you. You know
why you never won a game with hope before, because
hope is not a strategy exactly. All right, now he's
getting a todd Sparks spark back in your life. How
are you feeling? I can tell you're feeling better, all right.
I just want to get to the point real quick.
So your trainer said that you want to stay on
track as far as eating healthy and continuing to keep
the weight off. Yes, because you all right, you're committed
(07:23):
to it, and that's good. Here's the thing though, that
I want to tell you. Okay, you're scared. I can
tell you're scared at Chris is afraid of cat. Telling
me a scaredy cat is not motivational. But like childhood bullying,
I mean we have already ground here. What I mean
(07:43):
is you're scared to gain the weight again now that
you've lost it. All right? Yeah, absolutely, And let me
tell you. I'm here to give you some good news
straight from the mouth todd Sparks, which is a clean
mouth and a good mouth. You'd like my mouth if
we were in person, right, now tell you that you'd
love my mouth. I would like your mouth. You would
love it about everybody loves my mouth because a lot
(08:08):
of good comes out of this mouth. I will just
tell you this. Overweight is a state of mind. Eat
what you want. You're welcome. Okay, that's it. Think skinny,
be skinny. It's that simple. Wow, it's really that simple.
So I want you to do me a favorite to
day and go ahead and eat a box of donuts.
Because you just learned how to think skinny. You're you're
(08:30):
staying to throw the meal plan out and just eat
a box of donuts. Think skinny, and I'll be skinny.
That doesn't make any sense. Like, yeah, So I'm gonna
go ahead because I can tell this is not fully
setting in and I have your card number and everything
for the deposit that you paid, which again not refundable.
I'm gonna go ahead and just charge you the two
hundred dollars for my new book, todd Sparks the skinny
(08:52):
on skinny, think and feel the burn because I gotta
throw a spark thing in there. You know what, don't
charge my card. Okay, you're a fraud, dude. This is
what you need to know you're a fraud. If you
charge my card, I'll sue you. Okay, I don't want to.
This is both man, you suck. You're saying ridiculous. I'll
tell you what. Being a fraud, though, is not a lie.
(09:13):
I am exactly a fraud because this is actually Jewil
from The Jewel Show doing a phone prank on you
and your trainer, Hank set you up. What Oh my god.
I'm just like trying to figure out how to get
through the phone and punch you in the face. He's like,
congratulations on reaching your goal and wanted to mess with
you a little bit, and he knows that you'll be
able to keep the weight off and stay motivated. So
(09:36):
all right, well I cannot believe this. Hey, keep that
spark going, all right? Oh yeah, I'll keep a spark going.
Wake up every morning with Jubil phone pranks, we say,
Mornings on the twenties, The Jewel Show on Demand, first
day follow up. Never know where you might meet the
(09:57):
love of your life. It could be the grocery store,
could be a farmer's market. I hear there's lots of
loves of lives at farmer's markets. Walking around really could
be a funeral home. Wow, could be a retirement home, grandma,
And that's where Bruce, who's on the phone today for
a first date follow up, met the girl that he
(10:18):
went on a date with, and now she's not calling
him back. So Bruce is obviously into older ladies. How
are you? Oh? What an intro? Thank you so much
for taking my call. I hate to break it to you. Um,
I was at the retirement home visiting my grandma. I
love my grandma. She I don't care what your reasons
were for being at the retirement home. I'm not judging that.
(10:39):
I'm not even judging you for asking out older ladies
at the retirement home. Everybody's got their thing that they're into.
So tell us about the great place for scouting. Yeah,
tell us about the woman you went out on a
date with. What's her name? What's her age? Ethel? Her
name's May Deane, she's twenty six. She actually works at
the retirement home. That relation, I'm trying to set us
(11:01):
up for months now, Like she works with my grandma,
Like pretty often I see her when I visit my grandma.
Stuff like that. How long has it been since your date? Um?
Maybe like a week? A little over a week ago.
How many times you try to reach out to her
in that week and a half. I've called like maybe twice,
(11:23):
but I have sent her more texts than I'd care
to admit. Right now, you know what you should have done.
You should have asked your grandma to get a hold
of her. I did, but my grandma said she didn't
say anything about the date. So that's even weirder. That's
kind of worst. Okay, So that is a lot of
(11:44):
reaching out to her and she didn't respond at all. No,
what did you guys do? So there's this really cool
restaurant right near the retirement home and I sometimes take
my grandma there, and I thought it was pretty cool,
and like, I don't know, they know me there, and
obviously I wasn't there with my grandma, so they knew
I was like on a date, and like, I feel
(12:07):
like she just didn't like it because it was close
there and I took my grandma there, like she felt
like I didn't like take it seriously or something like.
That's how I feel like, vibe, I'm denning why she's
not calling me back or whatever. As long as it
wasn't a place like Denny's. You know where I could
see Grandma's liking to go, yeah Miami. Was it a
(12:28):
diner or was it like a really cool restaurant. Grandma's
more of an eyehop lady, but this was just more
of like a I don't want to say, like low key,
but it's just a nice little Italian restaurant. Yeah. I
don't think that going to a restaurant close to where
she works would be a problem. No, I don't know.
I had a good time and I thought it went well,
(12:48):
Like when I asked her for her number, she seemed
really into it. I thought we had a good date.
But then just complete no calls, no text Afterwards, I'm like,
I don't know what I could have said her done
for such a I don't know, extreme like reaction, because
it's like now I'm like even afraid to go visit
my grandma because there might be this awkward tension. Okay, well,
(13:08):
how did the date end? Did you get a kiss?
A hug? It was a hug, but like you know,
it was more of like a lunch date, sort of
saying it wouldn't have that. I don't know, it wasn't
like in the evening where I feel like that sort
of ending happens. I don't know, maybe I'm overthinking that,
all right. And when you guys parted ways, did you,
you know, make plans to go out again in the future,
(13:31):
you know how that happens, Like, Hey, that was a
really fun time. I enjoy myself so much, so did
I would you like to go out again soon? Yes?
I would? Goodbye? Yeah. I kind of made some sort
of mention as like, you know, we hugged and went
our separate ways, and she said, yeah, that'd be great
or something along those lines. That's exactly what I said.
That is the exact same. All right. Well, we'll try
(13:53):
to figure it out for you, because I mean everything
you're telling us, like you're sure not leaving anything out
important in the story because it sound always, you know,
pretty normal. And sometimes we'll call someone and they're like, oh, yeah,
they burn the whole restaurant down. Sud No, I really can't.
I don't know, I can't think of anything. I just
feel like she was just polite and like going on
the date with you to begin with, like movie, she
just doesn't like you, and she just did it to
(14:13):
like get it over with and maybe to please the
grandma as well. I mean, that could be it, but
I'd rather she had just said no, then I don't know.
All right, we'll play a song, come back, and then
call her. Se'nt figure it out? What your first day
fall up? Oh? Thank you in the middle of your
first day fall up? If you're just joining us. Bruce
is on the phone, and Bruce met the girl who's
(14:34):
not calling him back at a retirement home. And no,
she's not one of the retirees who lives there. She
actually works there. His grandma lives at the retirement home.
So he asked her out and they went out to
an a tirean restaurant down the street. He says, everything
went fine, and now she's ghost him for over a
week and a half and he has no idea why.
So we're gonna call her and try to figure it out.
(14:54):
You really can't think of anything, Bruce, I really can't.
I've been replaying the situation over and over again in
my head. My thought had even ended, well, like, I'm
really just confused about the whole thing. Okay, I'm gonna
call it right now and see if we can figure
it out for you. Right, you're ready, awesome, I'm ready? Hello,
(15:22):
Hi man, I speak to Nadine. Please. This is Nadine. Nadine,
how are you? My name is Jewel Fresh from the
Jewel Show. Mine's Alex Fresh from the Jewel Show. Minds
English Evan from the Jewel Show. And this is if
you haven't figured that out by now, the show. Okay,
I'm sorry who I'm a little confused The Jewel Show. So, like,
(15:47):
why are you guys calling me? Well, the Jewels Show
is a radio show, and we do a thing on
the show where we if you go out on a
date with someone and then don't call them back, they
can email us to get you on the phone and
ask you what happened and why you're not getting back
to them. It's called a first date follow up. Oh boy,
(16:10):
can we go back to politics? I think I'd rather
talk politics. Yeah. Well, so you went on a date
with someone that lets listen to our show and they
emailed us. So do you have any guests on who
would be? I have my suspicion, but I'm gonna instead
of opening mouth and inserting foot, I'm gonna let you
guys tell me what's going on. You met a guy
(16:33):
at the retirement home that you work at, and he
wasn't an elderly gentleman. He was of the young variety.
His name, I think it's Bruce. Yeah, I know who
you're talking about. Um. So he he called you, he
(16:54):
emailed us, told us about your date, told us that
you've been ghosting him for like a week and a half.
And then we talked to him on the phone and
learn a little more. And he's wondering what he did
because he really liked you. At this point, he's taken
every avenue, so I'll just put it all out there.
I'm not necessarily ghosting him. He spent the entire date
wishing his grandma was a ghost so he could have
(17:17):
her inheritance. And I did not appreciate that at all,
Like all of our residents are like second sets of
grandparents to me, Like I love our residence so much,
like I work at the retirement home that his grandmas
I'm sure told you everything. And so he's staying close
with his grandma so he can get her inheritance. He
(17:38):
legitimately was saying that, like he just can't wait for
her to die. Is to me insanely sad. Use those
exact words. Yes, and she's the sweetest woman and The
thing is is like he just seems like such a
snake because he's there a lot. He takes her out
and stuff. Until I always thought like, wow, like he
(17:59):
really like must be a good catch, Like what a
loving person? Yeah, yeah, we have a lot of residents
who just like sit there alone, you know, and like
she has company and she lights up every time he
walks from the door. And now I'm like, he's only
doing it because he's like money hungry. Okay, question for
you guys, everybody, including you, I know we just met,
but I have a question for you. So he's spending
(18:21):
time with his grandma to get the inheritance. So is
it a bad thing though, because at least he's spending
time with her. I mean, you don't know, won't hurt you?
But the truth is, I know, and it hurt me.
So I don't want to date somebody like that because
I truly and honestly care about my residence and I
care about my family, and like I want I mean,
(18:43):
like I'm in my mid twenties, I'm thinking, you know, future,
Like when I date somebody, I want to like not
waste time. I want to see you know, those things
are going to lead to somewhere, and he clearly is
not a family man, Like personally, I'm not. I'm just
not into him anymore. And it stinks because otherwise he
really seemed like a good guy. But I've been wrong before,
(19:03):
and I guess I was wrong again. The difference with
him is it sounds like if he's comfortable saying that
out loud, he's obviously a psycho, Like no one normal
says that out. I think it exactly, but you might
be like, man, I'm gonna get so much money, yeah,
but and to say it to you is like really weird, yeah,
because you work there and on a date. Right. Plus
he takes his grandma out to that same restaurant, So
(19:24):
I'm like, okay, if you were taking her here and
you want her dead so you can benefit from it,
what are you using me for? You know? Like I
just felt like if that's like, if that's how you're wired,
then if there's like no true altruism here, like there's
something up, like you want something from me, Like I
don't know. He just seems like a snake at this point,
and I'm just not interested in his trousers. Snake at
(19:44):
this juncture. He doesn't stop texting me at any point. Now,
that'd be great. Actually, now, yeah, let's just tell him
to stop texting anything because actually, Nadine, he's on the
phone listening, but like he's on he's on the line
right now. Yeah, I cannot with this person. Oh my god,
(20:05):
Nadine said to Bruce. Um, Hi, Nadine, Uh wow, this
is way more awkward than I ever thought it was
gonna be. Um, yeah, those were just jokes. I just
take a joke about it. And I guess it was.
I was nervous, it was poorly times and stuff like that.
I said the thing about the inheritance like when we
(20:27):
got the bill because it was just higher than I
thought it was gonna be because I eat there all
the time. Just weird things like that. I just didn't
I was just joking. But yeah, I just see how
it comes across as awful. I mean, I'm pretty sure
you said it more than once, and like the way
you're framing it right now. I was like, okay, Like
(20:47):
if you said it when the bill came, like I
can take a joke, I would laugh at that. I
would think that's like probably you know, just ingest, But no,
you definitely said it multiple times. You literally were talking
about how you hate going there, you hate wasting your time.
I'm the only reason you even want to come around. Like,
don't don't start with this, honestly, Like, don't don't try
to like backpedal just because you're on the radio. You
(21:09):
did this to yourselves. You need to take your medicine,
just like all the folks at the retirement home need
to take theirs. So it is what it is. I'm sorry,
it's just not going to work out. I'll be polite
and professional when I see you at the center, but
like that's really it. So you swear he wasn't joking,
and Bruce used you swear you were joking. I mean,
like she doesn't even have like a good sense of
humor obviously, So it's like I don't want to date
(21:31):
somebody like that, you know, Oh Bruce, Wow, Okay, maybe
you're just not funny. So there's that. Um, I think
I have plenty of a sense of humor. I burned
you multiple times in this call, sir, So I'm really
not well. I do have to ask a question, even
though I'm gonna take a wild guess and say that
(21:52):
you guys want to go out again. But Nadine, would
you like to go on another date with Bruce? We
will pay for it. Um, that's going to be a
no for me. Dog, But you can go ahead and
give him the money because clearly that's all he's interested.
The Jewels Show on demand Jebils dirty Little Secret. Today's
(22:13):
dirty little Secret will make your piece mouth funny? Yeah, yes, yes.
Asparagus is on the phone. Remember, we give everybody a
fake anonymous nicknames. You want to tell us a dirty
little secret, all you have to do is text in
four one O six one. You can tell us anything.
We keep everybody anonymous. We don't even ask what your
name is. That's why you get a fake name when
you call in. And Alex knew exactly where I was
going with that. Asparagus is on the phone. Hello, asparagus. Hey,
(22:37):
this is asparagus. All right. You're delicious by the way. Yeah,
i'd like to point that out. Thanks, except if I
forget that I eat you and I wake up in
the morning to go to the bathroom, I'm like, oh
my god, what's wrong with me? Problem? And I'm like,
oh wait, oh that's good. I just had asparagus last night.
All right, So you have a dirty little secret you'd
like to tell us about asparagus. Yes, my dirty little
(23:01):
secret is that I have an odd kind of collection.
So when I was in high school, we had a
health class and they gave out free condoms to all
the students, nice, and I held on to that one. Yeah.
I was like, great, I might have to use this,
(23:23):
and so I like put it in a box. And
then I kept collecting different kinds of condoms everywhere I went,
Like if I went to the drug store, I'd be like, well,
maybe I'll just pick up these. And you go through
the condomile in the grocery store or wherever, and you're
just like, oh that, and you have a collection. All
(23:44):
I can think about that one. Yet, remember like when
your teams you can go to the walking clinic and
you get free condoms, like on the counter, there's all
of them. Yeah, did you steal all those? Yeah? Basically
like anyone that I hadn't had before I took. Or
like you know, in a like a bar, if you
go into the bathroom and there's like maybe weird ones,
(24:04):
you know, ribbed for her pleasure or for those weird
brands that you've never heard of. Yeah, yeah, where you're
like knocker brand condoms and I've never heard of them.
What's your best one, the one that you're most proud
of in your collection? Um, the one that's my favorite. Actually,
when you unroll it, it says your name here on it. Wow,
(24:27):
that's incredible. So you have a big collection of really
random condoms. Uh, yeah, that's true. It's a pretty big collection.
But that's uh, that's not actually my dirtiest little secret.
We even want to know. Yeah, what did you do
with these gondoms? Well, the problem is that I didn't
(24:51):
do anything with it. U. My collection is so big
because I'm actually still a virgin a ever even used
one at all before, other than maybe probably blown them
up in pop. Yeah, yeah, I've dave. I'm half of
them have expired at this point. Oh my god, keep collecting.
(25:12):
I think that's an amazing collection. Yeah. I mean, as
a conversation starter, it's a weird one. But maybe it'll
work one day. Maybe. I'd hate to say this too, Asparagus,
but you sound like, you know, relatively mature in terms
of age. How has it just not never happened or
you know, what's been the problem? Yeah, I don't I
(25:33):
don't know. I can never seem to like get over
the friendship hump, and I like what you did there
and when that does happen. Um, you know a lot
about protection, right, because you've been collecting it since you
were very young and have all kinds of different ones.
Have you heard of the trojan extended pleasure ones? Who yes,
(25:53):
I have like a numbing thing in it, so that
oh so you can, you can last so a little
bit longer, longer, longer than thirty second. Yeah, they make
a spray too, so spy. Oh my god, yeah, so
that you yeah, so that you don't seek a last longer.
But it's not good though. I bet that's not good
(26:14):
for you. No, I mean it's not good as far
as how it makes you feel. Because it sounds like
a good idea, like, oh, this could help out, you know,
I could maybe last a little bit longer than a
TV commercial maybe, right, But then you use it and
then nothing works, because it's like if you know, if
you go to the dentist, right and you shot a novocane.
Oh yeah, it feels like that party you went to
the dentist and it just will not work. Oh okay,
(26:36):
don't get the spray. Just kidding. Yeah. They then all right, well,
thank you for your dirty little secret? Yeah, thanks guys.
What's your dirty little secret? The Jebil Show on demand?
It's another Jubil phone praying Hello, Hello there, This is
(27:01):
Aquarius calling from the Psychic Network. I was looking for Kelly. Uh, yes,
what are you? What are you calling records to? This
is Aquarius calling from the psychic Network. Your boss Mark
gifted you a psychic reading, and so that's why I'm calling.
Oh yeah, hi are you told me you'd be And
he said that you've always been wanting to do a
(27:22):
psychic reading? Is that the truth? Uh? No, actually I haven't,
but he thought this would be a cool gift. Well, yes,
I was sort of picking up on a bit of skepticism,
and we just do the reading. Yes, that would be great.
I knew you were going to say that. And here
we go. I'm beginning. Aquaria is here for my funky
(27:53):
spirit friends and Kelly, Kelly, I'm here. I'm on the
spirit a plain. I can see for miles and miles
and miles, and you know what I see what? I
see a young Kelly in her childhood home in Argentina.
(28:16):
I've never actually even been to Argentina. I grew up
in California. Called us Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, I'm sorry, I'm
I'm getting a very strong reading right now, very strong.
Hello Aquaria, Kelly, I I have some news for you. Yes,
you did not grow up in Argentina. It's actually California.
(28:40):
That's right. Told you, yes, and that's what I meant, right. Yes,
I was saying, I see a young kellying her child
at home in Bakersfield, California. I'm no, I was. I
actually grew up in Pasadena. Hold on, Kelly, I'm getting
something very strong that just came through Aquarius. I'm getting
a feeling of getting Let me guess, Can I just guess?
(29:01):
Excuse me? I have a little bit of a psychic
in Kelly. I Oh, I hate to ask you to
not do that again, but once Aquarius is making his
way into the spirit plane, if you interrupt him, it
can be very jarring. So I would ask you not
to interrupt me like that again. Okay, I'm sorry. I
(29:23):
have to keep interrupted you because I have a little
I'm having a psychic moment of my own, and I'm
pretty sure you're gonna tell me that I grew up
in Pasadena. Because I just told you that, Oh you are,
I must be speaking to someone who was also gifted. Yes,
I was going to say that you grew up in Pasadena, California, Kelly, Well,
because I told you that. How would I have been
able to know that if I was not in touch
(29:44):
with the divine? Because I told you that, I said it, Aquarius.
Oh hay, Steve, Hey, I just saw my friend Steve
on the spirit plane and he told me something about you, Kelly.
He said that he thinks you're getting frustrated with something
that's going on in your life right now. Yes, I am.
(30:06):
I'm actually I am getting upset and I'm getting very frustrated,
as you say, and I just keep hearing going, but
there's nothing that you say afterwards. And I'm sorry. I
don't mean to be rude, but are you red legit? Yes,
it's fine, let it out. I've told you some very
disturbing news that there's something going on that you feel
like you're wasting your time with. And it's okay for
you to feel those feelings and share them with Aquarius,
(30:26):
because I understand how that can feel when one is
wasting their time strating would you like to know what
is wasting your time? Would you like to know that
I already know what's wasting my time. This bone hall
is wasting my time. I have so many things that
I need to be doing right now, and instead I'm
just hearing you saying, Aquarius over, Okay, I'm getting something.
I'm getting something. I'm getting something. Aquaria, you there is
(30:50):
something you want to be doing right now, but you're
not doing it, and Aquarius feels that you should do it.
I need to hang up on you because you're obviously
up from well. Before you do that, I sh let
you know it's a prank phone call and then maybe
have to make more sense a prank phone call. Yes,
these days, he's actually Jewel from The Jewels Show doing
a phone prank on you and your boss Mark set
(31:11):
you up. Oh my god, I'm going to hear that, Aquarious,
like all day, Aquarius, no, no, no, wake up every
morning with jubil phone pranks, we'd say mornings on the
twenties the Jewbil Show on demand, It's time four of
(31:32):
the Roses only on The Jewbil Show. Show is on
the phone today for a War of the Roses to
catch a cheater and she thinks that her boyfriend Mike
might be cheating on her. That's the whole reason she
thinks that. I guess they've been dating for about nine months,
and Michelle, your email says that you guys moved pretty quickly. Yeah,
we are currently living together and like we've talked about marriage. Wow. Okay, yeah,
(31:57):
you're already living together after nine months. Yeah, okay, that's quick,
very quick. It is what makes you think that that
he's cheating? Um, well, so my sister told me that
he made a pass at her. But my thing is that,
like she's always been kind of a jealous person and
(32:18):
a pretty avid liar. Like she's you know, tried to
make up some stuff before and like ruined some relationships.
So I'm not really sure what to believe. But I
think something about this time, it's just not sitting right
with me. So I want to see what was going on.
(32:38):
How has she tried to ruin your relationships in the past.
I mean she's told me some lies like this one.
And she's also she's been the one to make passes
at my boyfriends. So she will hit on your boyfriends
on purpose. Yeah, it's not something new at all. Oh, Okay,
(33:00):
have your ex boyfriend's ever hit on her back? Yes,
it's happened a couple of times. So at this point,
I don't really know what to believe. That's why I'm
calling in. Why do you still talk to your sister? Yeah,
it's complicated. No, she's family, and you know you hope
(33:21):
that your sister's lying about him hitting on her, but
you're not sure. Yes, is there any other reason? Why
do you think that he might be cheating on you? Egg?
Has he been shady at all? Well, not necessarily shady,
but I don't know. I feel like I've noticed like
some glances here and there since she's told me, so, Like,
(33:44):
this is honestly just me trying to see if I'm
thinking too much into it or like something's really happening.
Have you asked her about it? Yeah? I like I've
asked her a couple of times after she told me,
and you know, she's just been like, I'm not lying
you to time this and that, So I'm not sure. Honestly,
(34:04):
she said that he hit on her, And did she
say anything about any other women or just that he
hit on her? She just said that he's hit on her,
and like he tried to kiss her once. Oh okay,
what did you ever confront your boyfriend about the kiss?
I mean, I like slip in some questions about my
(34:28):
sister casually sometimes, but it doesn't he doesn't really react,
so right, so it seems pretty not guilty. Yeah, Like
I've like slipped in a couple of questions about her,
and like, you know, he doesn't really react. He's like
called her crazy a couple of times. Sounds crazy a
(34:53):
little bit, yeah, I mean the way she's, you know,
trying to sabotage your relationships all the time sounds a
bit crazy to me. But we'll we'll see. Have you
thought of a way that we could call him where
it wouldn't seem suspect. Well, he shocked up, so I
figured maybe you guys could you know, call him up
(35:15):
and be like, I don't know, does he get calls
from there? I know they have his number because he
gets like texts about like sales and all that. Oh okay,
well that was then Well that's good. If if that
was fun, or he shops there and he likes the store,
then that's that's easy. Perfect. We'll pretend to call from there.
We'll offer him a discount or a gift card or
something like that, and then we'll offer him flowers to
(35:37):
send to somebody and see whose name he puts on
the card, either yours or maybe your sisters or maybe
someone else's sister who knows. Well, I hope it's me.
All right, we'll play a song come back, and then
we'll make our phone call to him and see if
we can catch him teating or not. Okay, all right,
thank you, Yeah, we'll do it next. It's a jewel
(35:58):
show on Hits one or six point one, right in
the middle of War of the Roses, to catch a
cheater and if you're just joining us. Michelle is on
the phone and she thinks that her boyfriend of nine
months might be playing snooker with someone else. Snooker. That's
a game you guys cool at snooker in England, it's
called snooka. She thinks that he might be actually cheating
with her sister, because apparently her sister has tried to
(36:21):
sabotage relationships of hers before by telling her that guys
are hitting on her when they haven't been, and then
she's also hit on some of her boyfriends. So really,
at the end of the day, Michelle does not have
a great sister, and she might not have a great boyfriend.
So we're about to call him and pretend to be
from where he shops a lot, and I guess he
gets text messages from them with sales from time to time.
So we're gonna pretend to be from there, offer from
a discount and some flowers to send to somebody and
(36:42):
see if he gives us his girlfriend Michelle's name or
someone else's Michelle. What's your sister's name? By the way,
her name is Emily, Emily. If he says Emily, then
we know who that is. All right? Are you ready
to go? Anything else you want to say before we
make our phone call? Oh, let's get going. All right,
let's get to it. Here we go. I'm Dallas Nam
(37:03):
right now. Hello? Is this Michael? Yes? Hey, what's up? Dude?
How are you good? Thanks? I'm gonna help you. My
(37:25):
name is Thad and I'm calling from dude. How are
you great? Yeah? I've got to call people today, um
that are regular customers, to tell them thank you for
the business, and then to also tell them that the
next time they come into the store they can receive
a twenty percent discount. All they have to do is
show the text message we will send you once this
(37:47):
phone call is over, and then you're good. All right,
that sounds good, So cool dude. And then also, um,
just to say thank you. We're sending flowers to people.
Are you saying flowers? Is somebody? Yes, to say thank
you for doing twenty percent discount. And then also hoping
that you'll get someone else in the store, you send
(38:08):
him some flowers and then maybe like you put on
the card like, hey, come in by a shirt for me.
Would you like to send anybody flowers? Um? Yeah, why not?
Let's do it. Um, all I need well, I'm gonna
need the address and all that stuff to plug in
the computer here, and then i'll need the name of
the person. Well let's start with the UM name first.
Can you give me the name of the person that
(38:28):
you want to send him to you? Yeah? Emily? Oh
that's crazy. What's crazy? I had a girlfriend named Emily
in middle school and I always think about her. So
that Yeah, Um, is there anything you'd like to put
(38:50):
on a card? Um? Yeah, I just you can put
it in there like you're the real one for me, Oh,
the real one for you? Huh. Yeah, I would have
thought the roal one for you would have been Michelle,
your girlfriend, instead of her sister. That's what I would
have thought. Yeah, wait what Yeah, what the mike? Um?
(39:19):
What's going on right now? Like, Michelle, why are you
on the phone? Why do you think I'm on the phone? Um?
I don't know, Like I'm so confused right now? Are
you at the store? No, she's not. This is actually
the Jewel Show. My name is Jewel fresh Mine's Alex
fresh Mind's English Evan, and your girlfriend, Michelle is on
(39:40):
the phone because she thought you might be cheating on
her with her sister named Emily and serious right now? Yeah? Serious?
Are you serious? Just sending my sister flowers? Yeah? I
(40:00):
mean yeah, I'm just like I'm talking to your sister. Sorry,
you told me you thought she was crazy? You've been
lying to me? Yeah, yeah, I guess, Like I don't know,
it's just we were like talking, like texting back and
forth and just like led to more. I don't know
(40:27):
what to tell you, Like, it's just it's just what's
going on right now. I can't believe this is happening again. Well,
Like Michelle, I mean, you're like always like checking on
me or always like checking in and doing stuff like this.
I mean, it's like, why wouldn't you I'm not, I
mean I wasn't at first and until you's like started
(40:51):
accusing me and Stoff and it's like we were just
like texting back and forth and she just like wouldn't
take no for an answer. So I don't know, it
just like started hanging out and you can also continue
to say no. You can also continue as they know
you have that power. Yeah, It's just it was really hard.
She's very very pressing individual. I don't know, she's uh, wow,
(41:16):
you don't know anymore. You know, you can't turn it
out your girlfriend's sister. Why can't her sister find her
own men? Yeah, it's the fact that you're like putting
it on Emily. Now, Yeah, it's her fault, but you
can literally say no, this is your fault, all right,
excusing you. And I've been checking up on you because
(41:39):
literally you've been cheating on me. I mean, but like
I haven't always been cheating on you, like it has
just that way. Yeah, it has. It's just been very recent,
Like you know, I talked to your sister, like she
isn't like she's not pressing for anything. She's just like
very easy to get along. Way. I don't know, I
(42:00):
just feel like we get along. This isn't making things like,
well guess what she's she's done this before, and the
moment I break up with you, which is right now,
by the way, she's done, stop talking to you. The
only reason that you want you is because I am
with you. Yeah, all right, okay, I mean we'll see
(42:20):
when that happens. Like, what else? Is there anything else
you guys need? I mean, what do you say? No? Nothing?
I mean nothing, dude. I think you've told us everything
we need to know. I just want to let you
know that the twenty percent discount is still good. You
could just go into the store and get it. Okay.
Oh my god, Michelle, Just like we talked about at
(42:42):
the beginning of this whole thing, I think you need
to get a new sister. Yeah. Time to cut Emily
off for real? Yeah yeah, I think I probably will.
I can't keep doing this anymore. Thanks for the helps, guys,
no problem, and you will find someone out there who
won't cheat with your sister, And hopefully you'll find a
(43:04):
sister who won't want to cheat with I don't know
if that was possible, but anyway, things will get better.
Thanks guys. Yeah, the Jewel shows were of the roses.
The Jewel Show on demand. Dexter is dead? What it's
the Jewel Show? Who's Dexter? Dexter is not dead. That's
a text that somebody got and it's made national news
(43:27):
and it's going viral because that's a text that a
dog owner got from a groomer on accident. It was
a mistext. They meant to text him the height Dexter
is ready because they were grooming him, and the accidentally
texted him Dexter is dead and you posted online to
a viral and then there's text after that was like
a picture of Dexter the dog at the groomer like proof,
(43:48):
Hey look he's still alive. And okay, wow, that's embarrassing.
Text in four one o six one calls up add
eight three four three one oh six one. That unfortunate
mistext leads us to the question, what's the most awkward
miss text you've ever sent? And that's how you do it.
That is how you make broadcast industry interesting. History is
(44:08):
you see a story like that? History? Yeah, Like there's
a Hall of Fame me in there one day, You're saying,
because the transition was so good, because it's just genius
to see a story like that online, and they'd be like,
why don't we do a topic about it, because a
lot of people have awkward miss texts that they've sent.
I can't even think of like a time where I
sent a mistext. I know I have, but I don't
remember what I said. But I received one from my
(44:29):
ex husband that said I love you yeah recently, too recently,
and he was like texting his girlfriend something and then
he sent it to me because like we had just
been texting not too long before that, and I didn't respond.
I'm like, I knew that he meant to send it
to his girlfriend. I'm like, that's skworth gosh, waite did
he wrote like a couple of hours later, and I
was like, sorry, I'm in there for my girlfriend. Yeah,
(44:50):
like I hope. So super awkward when you said the
text like that and then you can't you don't notice
it for a while and then you check and you're like,
oh my goodness, yeah, I told my ex wife that
I loved her. A couple hours I did reply, right,
I'm like a girlfriend probably didn't respond. He's like, why
didn't respond? And then when I when it came in,
I said, I love you. I showed it to Jewel
and I was like, ah, I was like, that's hilarious.
It's gonna be so embarrassed right now. Three one six one, Sean,
(45:13):
what's up? How are you? Hey? I'm good? How much?
Just um? Talking about texting people are awkward texts? Oh
my god, Well, I accidentally text someone something that I
wasn't supposed to text, and it was crazy. I text,
(45:33):
I choked on a goat this morning, and that's not
what I meant to text. Joke on a goat? Is
what you said? Yes, I choked on a goat this morning.
I'm trying to think what you No, No, no, well no,
I actually meant to say I choked on toast this morning.
(45:55):
Choked on toast. Why did you text that too? Oh
my god, my boss, Oh that's not ideal. You just
texted your boss I choked on a goat this morning. Yes,
I'm assuming the boss was pretty confused. Extremely what did
they say back? Oh my god? He text me back
(46:17):
and it said, are you taking a six day? Yeah?
That's a good question. I guess if I had an
employee that said they choked on a goat, I'd be like,
you probably can't make it into work then, right right,
all right, well, thank you very phone call, Thank you?
One six one T What was the miss text that
you sent? So I sent my best friend then I
(46:40):
killed her at the front door, Oh hopefully, and you're
not a murderer. I am not a murderer. I meant
to write kissed her at the front door, but I
texted it while I was going into a meeting. So
my friend just was on hold basically for two hours
of my life before I responded back like oops, like
(47:01):
spelling there. So he's sit there like, oh my god,
he's like holding all my friends to make sure. I
was like just joking, or you're lucky he didn't cool
the cops. Yeah, because he weren't able to text back
for two hours. He had to be like, oh dude,
he's he's fleeing the country or I don't know, that's
why he's my best friend. Eight three one to six
one all of What was the mistext that you sent?
(47:23):
Oh my god, it's so embarrassing. I texted my best
friend verbatim. It said Um, I'm going to sleep on
my dad's body this weekend. Oh, sleep on your dad's
body this weekend. I'm glad that was a mistext. What
were you trying to say? Um? Well, he certainly wasn't
trying to admit that. I was trying because I was
(47:45):
sleeping on my dad's boat boat boat like, extend the
invite to my best friend. And instead she responded and
just said kinky with a wink face. What he said? No, thanks,
been there, done that? Yeah? More awkward. No, I wouldn't
be the best friend to do jump off the boat
(48:06):
with Cement shows on that one. All right, call us
up made three four three one six one, text in
four on sixth one. What's the most unfortunate mistext you've
ever sent? The Jebils Show on demand, Jebils Dirty Little Secret.
Today's dirty little secret will make your piece mouth funny? Yeah, yes, yes,
asparagus is on the phone. Remember we give everybody a
(48:28):
fake anonymous nicknames. You want to tellus a dirty little secret,
all you have to do is text in four one
six one. You can tell us anything. We keep everybody anonymous.
We don't even ask what your name is. That's why
you get a fake name when you call in, and
Alex knew exactly where I was going with that. Asparagus
is on the phone. Hello, asparagus. Hey, this is asparagus.
All right. You're delicious, by the way. Yeah, i'd like
to point that out. Thanks, except if I forget that
(48:50):
I eat you and I wake up in the morning
to go to the bathroom, I'm like, oh my god,
what's wrong with me? Problem? And I'm like, oh wait,
oh that's oh good. I just ad asparagus last nime.
All right, So you have a dirty little secret you'd
like to tell us about asparagus. Yeah, So my dirty
little secret is that I have an odd kind of collection.
(49:11):
So when I was in high school, we had a
health class and they gave out free condoms to all
the students, nice and I held on to that one. Yeah.
I was like, great, I might have to use this,
and so I like put it in a box. And
(49:33):
then I kept collecting different kinds of condoms everywhere I went, Like,
if I went to the drug store, I'd be like, well,
maybe I'll just pick up these. So yeah, and you
go through the condom miisle and the grocery store or wherever,
and you're just like, oh that and you have a
collection all. I got to think about that one yet.
Remember like when your teens can go to the walking
(49:53):
clinic and you get free condoms, like on the counter,
there's all of them. Yeah, did you steal all those? Yeah?
They like anyone that I hadn't had before I took.
Or like you know, in a like a bar, if
you go into the bathroom and there's like maybe weird ones,
you know, ribbed her her Pleasure or for those weird
(50:13):
brands that you've never heard of. Yeah, yeah, where you're
like knocker brand condoms and I've never heard of them.
What's your best one? The one that you're most proud
of in your collection? Um, the one that's my favorite.
Actually when you unroll it, it says your name here
on it. Wow, that's incredible. So you have a big
(50:37):
collection of really random condoms. Uh, yeah, that's true. It's
a pretty big collection. But that's uh, that's not actually
my dirtiest little secret. Even want to know, Yeah, what
did you do with these condoms? Well, the problem is
that I didn't do anything with it. My action is
(51:00):
so big because I actually still a virgin. You've never
even used one at all before other than maybe probably
blown them up in pop m Yeah, yeah, I've I'm
half of them have expired at this point. Oh my god,
keep collecting. I think that's an amazing collection. Yeah, I
(51:22):
mean as a conversation starter, it's a weird one. But
maybe it'll work one day. Maybe. I'd hate to say
this too, asparagus, but you sound like, you know, relatively
mature in terms of age. How has it just not
never happened or you know what's been the problem? Yeah?
I don't. I don't know. I can never seem to
like get over the friendship hump. And I like what
(51:46):
you did there and when that does happen. Um, you
know a lot about protection, right because you've been collecting
it since you were very young, and I'm all kinds
of different ones. Have you heard of the trojan extended
pleasure ones who yes, yeah, but like a numbing thing
in it so that oh so you can you can
last last for a little bit longer, longer longer than second. Yeah,
(52:09):
they make a spray too, so they Oh my god,
yeah so that you Yeah, so they don't seek a
last longer. But it's not good though. I bet that's
not good for you. No, I mean it's not good
as far as how it makes you feel, because it
sounds like a good idea, like, oh, this could help out,
you know, I can maybe last a little bit longer
than a TV commercial maybe, right, But then you use
(52:32):
it and then nothing works because it's like if you know,
if you go to the dentist, right and your shot
of novacane. Oh yeah, it feels like that party you
went to the dentist and it just will not work.
Oh okay, don't get the spray kidding. Yeah. They then
all right, well, thank you for your dirty little secret? Yeah?
Thanks good? What's your dirty little secret? The Jewil Show
(52:56):
on demand and remember anything you missed on the show,
you can always find it at the Jewil Show on
TikTok and Instagram, or you can follow all of us individually.
I'm at Jewel Fresh. My name is pell j U
b al No, he never knows how to spell it,
So there you go. Mind's at Thatrea's mind's at Evan
on the radio. And we never like to break the
news to you, so we'll let Kim k do it
for us. And I just want you guys know, like
(53:16):
how much we really appreciate you guys, Each and every
one of you are spending time away from your families
to be with our crazy family. All right, we'll see
you later. It's a jewel show.
Ladies and gentstic is the moment you've waited for. The
Jewels Show is here. Get your butt at the front door.
We are super villains ready to overtake the world, and
we're gonna do it in style. It's time for the
best ready ego you've heard in a while, The Jews Show.
(00:28):
One of two things is about to happen. It's the
Jewel Show that's happening right now. One of two things
is about to happen. Either you're gonna get really nostalgic
and cry a bunch, or you're gonna learn something right
now that will make you so cool that all your
friends will be jealous of you. Because the nineties nineties
stuff is very popular right now. Yeah, it was the
(00:49):
best decade. I feel like I like the nineties. I
grew up in the nineties. Alex Fresh grew up in
the nineties. English seven grew up whin I technically did.
I was born in ninety three, but I feel like
I was too young to experience it. Yeah, you still
haven't grown up. And we have a list of the
ten snacks from the nineties that you can still buy
on Amazon. Oh yeah, if you were a kid in
the nineties, or you really wish you were like most
people right now, you would have been munching on some
(01:11):
pretty amazing snacks and not all of the extincts. So
it's it's actually cool when you find something that you
thought was discontinued and realize that it still exists. So
here are some of the nostalgic snacks from the nineties
that you can still buy on Amazon. Dunk a Ruse,
Dunk Rush, the cookie things chocolate. It's like a dunk
(01:31):
and they're not good, that's right. I used to like
the commercials for those. I watched a lot of TV
as a kid. I was raised by the TV. They
did have good commercials, but it didn't work because I
didn't have a good tasting product. It sounds delicious, though,
a cookie dunking chocolate. I can't think of ever having
Dunk a Ruse text in four one six one. By
the way, what's your favorite nineties snack? They're still available
on Amazon. Se because your parents told you that you
were allergic to chocolate, that is true. My parents told
(01:53):
me that it was allergic to chocolate was lies and
never bought Dunk Ruse. So I never had chocolate because
if I had chocolate, I would go crazy and fight people.
Um airheads. Airheads are another one of you, yes, okay,
which I mean they were in the nineties, and so
it's weird that's on the list, right, So I think
Amazon made a list and put it out there on
(02:13):
the internet on the news sites to be like, these
are nineties snacks that you can buy right now, because
the nineties are like the hip popular thing right now, right,
and so all this stuff is available in stores. I
don't know much about candy and snacks, so I just
grabbed it. But there could be someone out there who's
thinking about the nineties when they were riding around on
their bike or skating around on their skateboard, listening to
(02:34):
some Tupac, probably Aggy or I think, like that's what
I grew up on. But I think other people that
I've heard, when they think of the nineties, they think
of um, Nirvana. Oh, like the Bronze music was big. Yeah,
I didn't listen to I never did either. I listened
to rapping, R and B, so I was a bit
more into rock. But okay, yeah, all right, these are
(02:55):
snacks that are still available on Amazon to buy and
also in stores apparently from the nineties. So we're now
we're just talking about ninety snacks, going like remember that?
So remember little hug fruit barrels. I don't, Oh gosh, yes,
it's those drinks. It's those fruit drinks that aren't like
the small barrels are clear and they come in all
the different rainbow colors, the little clear ones with like
the foil top. I never know what. I don't know
(03:17):
those ones. But you know what, what drink I loved
in the nineties? What because I always like I always
likes yeah, is it squeeze it where you squeeze it
and has like this like a skinny long one. It
looks like a coke bottle. Right, those are squeezes long.
So those are the barrels. I'm showing jewel to barrels.
I don't remember those things. I don't remember barrels, No,
my god, but I remember squeeze it's big time and
(03:40):
squeeze it's yeah. I've always like liquid snacks more than
cherie snacks, so I guess it means I like drinks.
But um, yeah, squeeze it's I love squeeze. It's oh
my god, always left like a weird taste. Like after
taste my mouth. Oh, I loved Squeeze. It has way
too much sugar. If you're doing that, that's probably why.
And the best thing about Squeeze it's for me. It
had a little plastic, like soft plastic tip that you
(04:01):
had to like twist off. Yeah, and I would chew
on that tip after too. I think every kid did.
I think. I think everybody I knew chewed on the
tip of the squeeze at too. But I was just
thinking about how soft, and yeah, it was actually a
good thing to chew on, and I did it every
single time. Yeah, it was. That conversation should definitely be
taken out context. Pop rocks, there are still around in
(04:22):
the nineties, are cool? Yes, just for the sensation in
my mouth. Oh, it's amazing. I just gave Jack's, my
nine year old son, pop rocks like two weeks ago
for the first time. What did he say? He thought
it was cool? Yeah. And another popular snack at him
from the nineties that you can still buy an Amazon.
This conversation could probably taken out of context. To gushers, Oh,
people loved gusts float in your mouth. Gushers, that's not okay,
(04:46):
And they're filled with like like yummy juice. Oh yeah,
I liked those nineties was all about sensations. The nineties
was all about things popping in your mouth. I no
wonder people like the nineties. Text in four one six one.
What's the favorite snack from the nineties you had that
popped in your mouth? And remember anything you missed on
the show. You're can always find it at the Jewils
Show on TikTok and Instagram, or you can follow all
(05:07):
of us individually. I met Jewel Fresh. My name is
spelled Juba l No. He never knows how to spell.
So there you go. Mine's at that Drea's Mind at
Evan on the radio, the Jebil Show on demand. It's
another jubile phone frame Mornings. That's twenties. Hello, Hey, todd Sparks,
(05:30):
put the spark back in your life. I was looking
for Crisp. Yeah. Hey, yeah, Chris, Chris. How are you
feeling great? Feeling good? I bet you are. This is
Todd Sparks, the motivational live coach that Hank set you
up with. Yeah, yeah, it's good to hear from you.
Its awesome. I'm excited. I'll tell you why. It's even
(05:51):
better to be talking to you, right. Have you checked
out my books by the way? Oh no, all right,
we'll do yourself a favor and pick one up now
that we're getting this whole thing started, todd Sparks Putting
the Spark Back in your Life. Second book follow up
that was todd Sparks spark Up another one, and third
installment was todd Sparks Sparking. Ain't easy, but it sure
is fun. I'm sure you've heard of me before. Actually
(06:15):
this was my first time. All right, all right, well,
I'm sure you've read some of my quotes on Instagram
or something like that. People are always posting them. But
it's a pleasure to meet you and make your acquaintance.
It's always good to meet a new lifetime friend. And
that's what we've just done. We've created a lifetime bond.
So tell me what is the thing? Okay, how about this?
(06:39):
I hope to keep off? All right? Wait, okay, they
may stop you right there, No bad dog, No hope.
It's not a strategy, sir. Hope is not a strategy.
When's the last time you won a game with hope?
I guess you're right, never right, never never, And you
know why never and you know why. Here's another todd
(06:59):
Sparks Barca wisdom I'm dishing out to you. You know
why you never won a game with hope before, because
hope is not a strategy exactly. All right, now he's
getting a todd Sparks spark back in your life. How
are you feeling? I can tell you're feeling better, all right.
I just want to get to the point real quick.
So your trainer said that you want to stay on
track as far as eating healthy and continuing to keep
the weight off. Yes, because you all right, you're committed
(07:23):
to it, and that's good. Here's the thing though, that
I want to tell you. Okay, you're scared. I can
tell you're scared at Chris is afraid of cat. Telling
me a scaredy cat is not motivational. But like childhood bullying,
I mean we have already ground here. What I mean
(07:43):
is you're scared to gain the weight again now that
you've lost it. All right? Yeah, absolutely, And let me
tell you. I'm here to give you some good news
straight from the mouth todd Sparks, which is a clean
mouth and a good mouth. You'd like my mouth if
we were in person, right, now tell you that you'd
love my mouth. I would like your mouth. You would
love it about everybody loves my mouth because a lot
(08:08):
of good comes out of this mouth. I will just
tell you this. Overweight is a state of mind. Eat
what you want. You're welcome. Okay, that's it. Think skinny,
be skinny. It's that simple. Wow, it's really that simple.
So I want you to do me a favorite to
day and go ahead and eat a box of donuts.
Because you just learned how to think skinny. You're you're
(08:30):
staying to throw the meal plan out and just eat
a box of donuts. Think skinny, and I'll be skinny.
That doesn't make any sense. Like, yeah, So I'm gonna
go ahead because I can tell this is not fully
setting in and I have your card number and everything
for the deposit that you paid, which again not refundable.
I'm gonna go ahead and just charge you the two
hundred dollars for my new book, todd Sparks the skinny
(08:52):
on skinny, think and feel the burn because I gotta
throw a spark thing in there. You know what, don't
charge my card. Okay, you're a fraud, dude. This is
what you need to know you're a fraud. If you
charge my card, I'll sue you. Okay, I don't want to.
This is both man, you suck. You're saying ridiculous. I'll
tell you what. Being a fraud, though, is not a lie.
(09:13):
I am exactly a fraud because this is actually Jewil
from The Jewel Show doing a phone prank on you
and your trainer, Hank set you up. What Oh my god.
I'm just like trying to figure out how to get
through the phone and punch you in the face. He's like,
congratulations on reaching your goal and wanted to mess with
you a little bit, and he knows that you'll be
able to keep the weight off and stay motivated. So
(09:36):
all right, well I cannot believe this. Hey, keep that
spark going, all right? Oh yeah, I'll keep a spark going.
Wake up every morning with Jubil phone pranks, we say,
Mornings on the twenties, The Jewel Show on Demand, first
day follow up. Never know where you might meet the
(09:57):
love of your life. It could be the grocery store,
could be a farmer's market. I hear there's lots of
loves of lives at farmer's markets. Walking around really could
be a funeral home. Wow, could be a retirement home, grandma,
And that's where Bruce, who's on the phone today for
a first date follow up, met the girl that he
(10:18):
went on a date with, and now she's not calling
him back. So Bruce is obviously into older ladies. How
are you? Oh? What an intro? Thank you so much
for taking my call. I hate to break it to you. Um,
I was at the retirement home visiting my grandma. I
love my grandma. She I don't care what your reasons
were for being at the retirement home. I'm not judging that.
(10:39):
I'm not even judging you for asking out older ladies
at the retirement home. Everybody's got their thing that they're into.
So tell us about the great place for scouting. Yeah,
tell us about the woman you went out on a
date with. What's her name? What's her age? Ethel? Her
name's May Deane, she's twenty six. She actually works at
the retirement home. That relation, I'm trying to set us
(11:01):
up for months now, Like she works with my grandma,
Like pretty often I see her when I visit my grandma.
Stuff like that. How long has it been since your date? Um?
Maybe like a week? A little over a week ago.
How many times you try to reach out to her
in that week and a half. I've called like maybe twice,
(11:23):
but I have sent her more texts than I'd care
to admit. Right now, you know what you should have done.
You should have asked your grandma to get a hold
of her. I did, but my grandma said she didn't
say anything about the date. So that's even weirder. That's
kind of worst. Okay, So that is a lot of
(11:44):
reaching out to her and she didn't respond at all. No,
what did you guys do? So there's this really cool
restaurant right near the retirement home and I sometimes take
my grandma there, and I thought it was pretty cool,
and like, I don't know, they know me there, and
obviously I wasn't there with my grandma, so they knew
I was like on a date, and like, I feel
(12:07):
like she just didn't like it because it was close
there and I took my grandma there, like she felt
like I didn't like take it seriously or something like.
That's how I feel like, vibe, I'm denning why she's
not calling me back or whatever. As long as it
wasn't a place like Denny's. You know where I could
see Grandma's liking to go, yeah Miami. Was it a
(12:28):
diner or was it like a really cool restaurant. Grandma's
more of an eyehop lady, but this was just more
of like a I don't want to say, like low key,
but it's just a nice little Italian restaurant. Yeah. I
don't think that going to a restaurant close to where
she works would be a problem. No, I don't know.
I had a good time and I thought it went well,
(12:48):
Like when I asked her for her number, she seemed
really into it. I thought we had a good date.
But then just complete no calls, no text Afterwards, I'm like,
I don't know what I could have said her done
for such a I don't know, extreme like reaction, because
it's like now I'm like even afraid to go visit
my grandma because there might be this awkward tension. Okay, well,
(13:08):
how did the date end? Did you get a kiss?
A hug? It was a hug, but like you know,
it was more of like a lunch date, sort of
saying it wouldn't have that. I don't know, it wasn't
like in the evening where I feel like that sort
of ending happens. I don't know, maybe I'm overthinking that,
all right. And when you guys parted ways, did you,
you know, make plans to go out again in the future,
(13:31):
you know how that happens, Like, Hey, that was a
really fun time. I enjoy myself so much, so did
I would you like to go out again soon? Yes?
I would? Goodbye? Yeah. I kind of made some sort
of mention as like, you know, we hugged and went
our separate ways, and she said, yeah, that'd be great
or something along those lines. That's exactly what I said.
That is the exact same. All right. Well, we'll try
(13:53):
to figure it out for you, because I mean everything
you're telling us, like you're sure not leaving anything out
important in the story because it sound always, you know,
pretty normal. And sometimes we'll call someone and they're like, oh, yeah,
they burn the whole restaurant down. Sud No, I really can't.
I don't know, I can't think of anything. I just
feel like she was just polite and like going on
the date with you to begin with, like movie, she
just doesn't like you, and she just did it to
(14:13):
like get it over with and maybe to please the
grandma as well. I mean, that could be it, but
I'd rather she had just said no, then I don't know.
All right, we'll play a song, come back, and then
call her. Se'nt figure it out? What your first day
fall up? Oh? Thank you in the middle of your
first day fall up? If you're just joining us. Bruce
is on the phone, and Bruce met the girl who's
(14:34):
not calling him back at a retirement home. And no,
she's not one of the retirees who lives there. She
actually works there. His grandma lives at the retirement home.
So he asked her out and they went out to
an a tirean restaurant down the street. He says, everything
went fine, and now she's ghost him for over a
week and a half and he has no idea why.
So we're gonna call her and try to figure it out.
(14:54):
You really can't think of anything, Bruce, I really can't.
I've been replaying the situation over and over again in
my head. My thought had even ended, well, like, I'm
really just confused about the whole thing. Okay, I'm gonna
call it right now and see if we can figure
it out for you. Right, you're ready, awesome, I'm ready? Hello,
(15:22):
Hi man, I speak to Nadine. Please. This is Nadine. Nadine,
how are you? My name is Jewel Fresh from the
Jewel Show. Mine's Alex Fresh from the Jewel Show. Minds
English Evan from the Jewel Show. And this is if
you haven't figured that out by now, the show. Okay,
I'm sorry who I'm a little confused The Jewel Show. So, like,
(15:47):
why are you guys calling me? Well, the Jewels Show
is a radio show, and we do a thing on
the show where we if you go out on a
date with someone and then don't call them back, they
can email us to get you on the phone and
ask you what happened and why you're not getting back
to them. It's called a first date follow up. Oh boy,
(16:10):
can we go back to politics? I think I'd rather
talk politics. Yeah. Well, so you went on a date
with someone that lets listen to our show and they
emailed us. So do you have any guests on who
would be? I have my suspicion, but I'm gonna instead
of opening mouth and inserting foot, I'm gonna let you
guys tell me what's going on. You met a guy
(16:33):
at the retirement home that you work at, and he
wasn't an elderly gentleman. He was of the young variety.
His name, I think it's Bruce. Yeah, I know who
you're talking about. Um. So he he called you, he
(16:54):
emailed us, told us about your date, told us that
you've been ghosting him for like a week and a half.
And then we talked to him on the phone and
learn a little more. And he's wondering what he did
because he really liked you. At this point, he's taken
every avenue, so I'll just put it all out there.
I'm not necessarily ghosting him. He spent the entire date
wishing his grandma was a ghost so he could have
(17:17):
her inheritance. And I did not appreciate that at all,
Like all of our residents are like second sets of
grandparents to me, Like I love our residence so much,
like I work at the retirement home that his grandmas
I'm sure told you everything. And so he's staying close
with his grandma so he can get her inheritance. He
(17:38):
legitimately was saying that, like he just can't wait for
her to die. Is to me insanely sad. Use those
exact words. Yes, and she's the sweetest woman and The
thing is is like he just seems like such a
snake because he's there a lot. He takes her out
and stuff. Until I always thought like, wow, like he
(17:59):
really like must be a good catch, Like what a
loving person? Yeah, yeah, we have a lot of residents
who just like sit there alone, you know, and like
she has company and she lights up every time he
walks from the door. And now I'm like, he's only
doing it because he's like money hungry. Okay, question for
you guys, everybody, including you, I know we just met,
but I have a question for you. So he's spending
(18:21):
time with his grandma to get the inheritance. So is
it a bad thing though, because at least he's spending
time with her. I mean, you don't know, won't hurt you?
But the truth is, I know, and it hurt me.
So I don't want to date somebody like that because
I truly and honestly care about my residence and I
care about my family, and like I want I mean,
(18:43):
like I'm in my mid twenties, I'm thinking, you know, future,
Like when I date somebody, I want to like not
waste time. I want to see you know, those things
are going to lead to somewhere, and he clearly is
not a family man, Like personally, I'm not. I'm just
not into him anymore. And it stinks because otherwise he
really seemed like a good guy. But I've been wrong before,
(19:03):
and I guess I was wrong again. The difference with
him is it sounds like if he's comfortable saying that
out loud, he's obviously a psycho, Like no one normal
says that out. I think it exactly, but you might
be like, man, I'm gonna get so much money, yeah,
but and to say it to you is like really weird, yeah,
because you work there and on a date. Right. Plus
he takes his grandma out to that same restaurant, So
(19:24):
I'm like, okay, if you were taking her here and
you want her dead so you can benefit from it,
what are you using me for? You know? Like I
just felt like if that's like, if that's how you're wired,
then if there's like no true altruism here, like there's
something up, like you want something from me, Like I
don't know. He just seems like a snake at this point,
and I'm just not interested in his trousers. Snake at
(19:44):
this juncture. He doesn't stop texting me at any point. Now,
that'd be great. Actually, now, yeah, let's just tell him
to stop texting anything because actually, Nadine, he's on the
phone listening, but like he's on he's on the line
right now. Yeah, I cannot with this person. Oh my god,
(20:05):
Nadine said to Bruce. Um, Hi, Nadine, Uh wow, this
is way more awkward than I ever thought it was
gonna be. Um, yeah, those were just jokes. I just
take a joke about it. And I guess it was.
I was nervous, it was poorly times and stuff like that.
I said the thing about the inheritance like when we
(20:27):
got the bill because it was just higher than I
thought it was gonna be because I eat there all
the time. Just weird things like that. I just didn't
I was just joking. But yeah, I just see how
it comes across as awful. I mean, I'm pretty sure
you said it more than once, and like the way
you're framing it right now. I was like, okay, Like
(20:47):
if you said it when the bill came, like I
can take a joke, I would laugh at that. I
would think that's like probably you know, just ingest, But no,
you definitely said it multiple times. You literally were talking
about how you hate going there, you hate wasting your time.
I'm the only reason you even want to come around. Like,
don't don't start with this, honestly, Like, don't don't try
to like backpedal just because you're on the radio. You
(21:09):
did this to yourselves. You need to take your medicine,
just like all the folks at the retirement home need
to take theirs. So it is what it is. I'm sorry,
it's just not going to work out. I'll be polite
and professional when I see you at the center, but
like that's really it. So you swear he wasn't joking,
and Bruce used you swear you were joking. I mean,
like she doesn't even have like a good sense of
humor obviously, So it's like I don't want to date
(21:31):
somebody like that, you know, Oh Bruce, Wow, Okay, maybe
you're just not funny. So there's that. Um, I think
I have plenty of a sense of humor. I burned
you multiple times in this call, sir, So I'm really
not well. I do have to ask a question, even
though I'm gonna take a wild guess and say that
(21:52):
you guys want to go out again. But Nadine, would
you like to go on another date with Bruce? We
will pay for it. Um, that's going to be a
no for me. Dog, But you can go ahead and
give him the money because clearly that's all he's interested.
The Jewels Show on demand Jebils dirty Little Secret. Today's
(22:13):
dirty little Secret will make your piece mouth funny? Yeah, yes, yes.
Asparagus is on the phone. Remember, we give everybody a
fake anonymous nicknames. You want to tell us a dirty
little secret, all you have to do is text in
four one O six one. You can tell us anything.
We keep everybody anonymous. We don't even ask what your
name is. That's why you get a fake name when
you call in. And Alex knew exactly where I was
going with that. Asparagus is on the phone. Hello, asparagus. Hey,
(22:37):
this is asparagus. All right. You're delicious by the way. Yeah,
i'd like to point that out. Thanks, except if I
forget that I eat you and I wake up in
the morning to go to the bathroom, I'm like, oh
my god, what's wrong with me? Problem? And I'm like,
oh wait, oh that's good. I just had asparagus last night.
All right, So you have a dirty little secret you'd
like to tell us about asparagus. Yes, my dirty little
(23:01):
secret is that I have an odd kind of collection.
So when I was in high school, we had a
health class and they gave out free condoms to all
the students, nice, and I held on to that one. Yeah.
I was like, great, I might have to use this,
(23:23):
and so I like put it in a box. And
then I kept collecting different kinds of condoms everywhere I went,
Like if I went to the drug store, I'd be like, well,
maybe I'll just pick up these. And you go through
the condomile in the grocery store or wherever, and you're
just like, oh that, and you have a collection. All
(23:44):
I can think about that one. Yet, remember like when
your teams you can go to the walking clinic and
you get free condoms, like on the counter, there's all
of them. Yeah, did you steal all those? Yeah? Basically
like anyone that I hadn't had before I took. Or
like you know, in a like a bar, if you
go into the bathroom and there's like maybe weird ones,
(24:04):
you know, ribbed for her pleasure or for those weird
brands that you've never heard of. Yeah, yeah, where you're
like knocker brand condoms and I've never heard of them.
What's your best one, the one that you're most proud
of in your collection? Um, the one that's my favorite. Actually,
when you unroll it, it says your name here on it. Wow,
(24:27):
that's incredible. So you have a big collection of really
random condoms. Uh, yeah, that's true. It's a pretty big collection.
But that's uh, that's not actually my dirtiest little secret.
We even want to know. Yeah, what did you do
with these gondoms? Well, the problem is that I didn't
(24:51):
do anything with it. U. My collection is so big
because I'm actually still a virgin a ever even used
one at all before, other than maybe probably blown them
up in pop. Yeah, yeah, I've dave. I'm half of
them have expired at this point. Oh my god, keep collecting.
(25:12):
I think that's an amazing collection. Yeah. I mean, as
a conversation starter, it's a weird one. But maybe it'll
work one day. Maybe. I'd hate to say this too, Asparagus,
but you sound like, you know, relatively mature in terms
of age. How has it just not never happened or
you know, what's been the problem? Yeah, I don't I
(25:33):
don't know. I can never seem to like get over
the friendship hump, and I like what you did there
and when that does happen. Um, you know a lot
about protection, right, because you've been collecting it since you
were very young and have all kinds of different ones.
Have you heard of the trojan extended pleasure ones? Who yes,
(25:53):
I have like a numbing thing in it, so that
oh so you can, you can last so a little
bit longer, longer, longer than thirty second. Yeah, they make
a spray too, so spy. Oh my god, yeah, so
that you yeah, so that you don't seek a last longer.
But it's not good though. I bet that's not good
(26:14):
for you. No, I mean it's not good as far
as how it makes you feel. Because it sounds like
a good idea, like, oh, this could help out, you know,
I could maybe last a little bit longer than a
TV commercial maybe, right, But then you use it and
then nothing works, because it's like if you know, if
you go to the dentist, right and you shot a novocane.
Oh yeah, it feels like that party you went to
the dentist and it just will not work. Oh okay,
(26:36):
don't get the spray. Just kidding. Yeah. They then all right, well,
thank you for your dirty little secret? Yeah, thanks guys.
What's your dirty little secret? The Jebil Show on demand?
It's another Jubil phone praying Hello, Hello there, This is
(27:01):
Aquarius calling from the Psychic Network. I was looking for Kelly. Uh, yes,
what are you? What are you calling records to? This
is Aquarius calling from the psychic Network. Your boss Mark
gifted you a psychic reading, and so that's why I'm calling.
Oh yeah, hi are you told me you'd be And
he said that you've always been wanting to do a
(27:22):
psychic reading? Is that the truth? Uh? No, actually I haven't,
but he thought this would be a cool gift. Well, yes,
I was sort of picking up on a bit of skepticism,
and we just do the reading. Yes, that would be great.
I knew you were going to say that. And here
we go. I'm beginning. Aquaria is here for my funky
(27:53):
spirit friends and Kelly, Kelly, I'm here. I'm on the
spirit a plain. I can see for miles and miles
and miles, and you know what I see what? I
see a young Kelly in her childhood home in Argentina.
(28:16):
I've never actually even been to Argentina. I grew up
in California. Called us Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, I'm sorry, I'm
I'm getting a very strong reading right now, very strong.
Hello Aquaria, Kelly, I I have some news for you. Yes,
you did not grow up in Argentina. It's actually California.
(28:40):
That's right. Told you, yes, and that's what I meant, right. Yes,
I was saying, I see a young kellying her child
at home in Bakersfield, California. I'm no, I was. I
actually grew up in Pasadena. Hold on, Kelly, I'm getting
something very strong that just came through Aquarius. I'm getting
a feeling of getting Let me guess, Can I just guess?
(29:01):
Excuse me? I have a little bit of a psychic
in Kelly. I Oh, I hate to ask you to
not do that again, but once Aquarius is making his
way into the spirit plane, if you interrupt him, it
can be very jarring. So I would ask you not
to interrupt me like that again. Okay, I'm sorry. I
(29:23):
have to keep interrupted you because I have a little
I'm having a psychic moment of my own, and I'm
pretty sure you're gonna tell me that I grew up
in Pasadena. Because I just told you that, Oh you are,
I must be speaking to someone who was also gifted. Yes,
I was going to say that you grew up in Pasadena, California, Kelly, Well,
because I told you that. How would I have been
able to know that if I was not in touch
(29:44):
with the divine? Because I told you that, I said it, Aquarius.
Oh hay, Steve, Hey, I just saw my friend Steve
on the spirit plane and he told me something about you, Kelly.
He said that he thinks you're getting frustrated with something
that's going on in your life right now. Yes, I am.
(30:06):
I'm actually I am getting upset and I'm getting very frustrated,
as you say, and I just keep hearing going, but
there's nothing that you say afterwards. And I'm sorry. I
don't mean to be rude, but are you red legit? Yes,
it's fine, let it out. I've told you some very
disturbing news that there's something going on that you feel
like you're wasting your time with. And it's okay for
you to feel those feelings and share them with Aquarius,
(30:26):
because I understand how that can feel when one is
wasting their time strating would you like to know what
is wasting your time? Would you like to know that
I already know what's wasting my time. This bone hall
is wasting my time. I have so many things that
I need to be doing right now, and instead I'm
just hearing you saying, Aquarius over, Okay, I'm getting something.
I'm getting something. I'm getting something. Aquaria, you there is
(30:50):
something you want to be doing right now, but you're
not doing it, and Aquarius feels that you should do it.
I need to hang up on you because you're obviously
up from well. Before you do that, I sh let
you know it's a prank phone call and then maybe
have to make more sense a prank phone call. Yes,
these days, he's actually Jewel from The Jewels Show doing
a phone prank on you and your boss Mark set
(31:11):
you up. Oh my god, I'm going to hear that, Aquarious,
like all day, Aquarius, no, no, no, wake up every
morning with jubil phone pranks, we'd say mornings on the
twenties the Jewbil Show on demand, It's time four of
(31:32):
the Roses only on The Jewbil Show. Show is on
the phone today for a War of the Roses to
catch a cheater and she thinks that her boyfriend Mike
might be cheating on her. That's the whole reason she
thinks that. I guess they've been dating for about nine months,
and Michelle, your email says that you guys moved pretty quickly. Yeah,
we are currently living together and like we've talked about marriage. Wow. Okay, yeah,
(31:57):
you're already living together after nine months. Yeah, okay, that's quick,
very quick. It is what makes you think that that
he's cheating? Um, well, so my sister told me that
he made a pass at her. But my thing is that,
like she's always been kind of a jealous person and
(32:18):
a pretty avid liar. Like she's you know, tried to
make up some stuff before and like ruined some relationships.
So I'm not really sure what to believe. But I
think something about this time, it's just not sitting right
with me. So I want to see what was going on.
(32:38):
How has she tried to ruin your relationships in the past.
I mean she's told me some lies like this one.
And she's also she's been the one to make passes
at my boyfriends. So she will hit on your boyfriends
on purpose. Yeah, it's not something new at all. Oh, Okay,
(33:00):
have your ex boyfriend's ever hit on her back? Yes,
it's happened a couple of times. So at this point,
I don't really know what to believe. That's why I'm
calling in. Why do you still talk to your sister? Yeah,
it's complicated. No, she's family, and you know you hope
(33:21):
that your sister's lying about him hitting on her, but
you're not sure. Yes, is there any other reason? Why
do you think that he might be cheating on you? Egg?
Has he been shady at all? Well, not necessarily shady,
but I don't know. I feel like I've noticed like
some glances here and there since she's told me, so, Like,
(33:44):
this is honestly just me trying to see if I'm
thinking too much into it or like something's really happening.
Have you asked her about it? Yeah? I like I've
asked her a couple of times after she told me,
and you know, she's just been like, I'm not lying
you to time this and that, So I'm not sure. Honestly,
(34:04):
she said that he hit on her, And did she
say anything about any other women or just that he
hit on her? She just said that he's hit on her,
and like he tried to kiss her once. Oh okay,
what did you ever confront your boyfriend about the kiss?
I mean, I like slip in some questions about my
(34:28):
sister casually sometimes, but it doesn't he doesn't really react,
so right, so it seems pretty not guilty. Yeah, Like
I've like slipped in a couple of questions about her,
and like, you know, he doesn't really react. He's like
called her crazy a couple of times. Sounds crazy a
(34:53):
little bit, yeah, I mean the way she's, you know,
trying to sabotage your relationships all the time sounds a
bit crazy to me. But we'll we'll see. Have you
thought of a way that we could call him where
it wouldn't seem suspect. Well, he shocked up, so I
figured maybe you guys could you know, call him up
(35:15):
and be like, I don't know, does he get calls
from there? I know they have his number because he
gets like texts about like sales and all that. Oh okay,
well that was then Well that's good. If if that
was fun, or he shops there and he likes the store,
then that's that's easy. Perfect. We'll pretend to call from there.
We'll offer him a discount or a gift card or
something like that, and then we'll offer him flowers to
(35:37):
send to somebody and see whose name he puts on
the card, either yours or maybe your sisters or maybe
someone else's sister who knows. Well, I hope it's me.
All right, we'll play a song come back, and then
we'll make our phone call to him and see if
we can catch him teating or not. Okay, all right,
thank you, Yeah, we'll do it next. It's a jewel
(35:58):
show on Hits one or six point one, right in
the middle of War of the Roses, to catch a
cheater and if you're just joining us. Michelle is on
the phone and she thinks that her boyfriend of nine
months might be playing snooker with someone else. Snooker. That's
a game you guys cool at snooker in England, it's
called snooka. She thinks that he might be actually cheating
with her sister, because apparently her sister has tried to
(36:21):
sabotage relationships of hers before by telling her that guys
are hitting on her when they haven't been, and then
she's also hit on some of her boyfriends. So really,
at the end of the day, Michelle does not have
a great sister, and she might not have a great boyfriend.
So we're about to call him and pretend to be
from where he shops a lot, and I guess he
gets text messages from them with sales from time to time.
So we're gonna pretend to be from there, offer from
a discount and some flowers to send to somebody and
(36:42):
see if he gives us his girlfriend Michelle's name or
someone else's Michelle. What's your sister's name? By the way,
her name is Emily, Emily. If he says Emily, then
we know who that is. All right? Are you ready
to go? Anything else you want to say before we
make our phone call? Oh, let's get going. All right,
let's get to it. Here we go. I'm Dallas Nam
(37:03):
right now. Hello? Is this Michael? Yes? Hey, what's up? Dude?
How are you good? Thanks? I'm gonna help you. My
(37:25):
name is Thad and I'm calling from dude. How are
you great? Yeah? I've got to call people today, um
that are regular customers, to tell them thank you for
the business, and then to also tell them that the
next time they come into the store they can receive
a twenty percent discount. All they have to do is
show the text message we will send you once this
(37:47):
phone call is over, and then you're good. All right,
that sounds good, So cool dude. And then also, um,
just to say thank you. We're sending flowers to people.
Are you saying flowers? Is somebody? Yes, to say thank
you for doing twenty percent discount. And then also hoping
that you'll get someone else in the store, you send
(38:08):
him some flowers and then maybe like you put on
the card like, hey, come in by a shirt for me.
Would you like to send anybody flowers? Um? Yeah, why not?
Let's do it. Um, all I need well, I'm gonna
need the address and all that stuff to plug in
the computer here, and then i'll need the name of
the person. Well let's start with the UM name first.
Can you give me the name of the person that
(38:28):
you want to send him to you? Yeah? Emily? Oh
that's crazy. What's crazy? I had a girlfriend named Emily
in middle school and I always think about her. So
that Yeah, Um, is there anything you'd like to put
(38:50):
on a card? Um? Yeah, I just you can put
it in there like you're the real one for me, Oh,
the real one for you? Huh. Yeah, I would have
thought the roal one for you would have been Michelle,
your girlfriend, instead of her sister. That's what I would
have thought. Yeah, wait what Yeah, what the mike? Um?
(39:19):
What's going on right now? Like, Michelle, why are you
on the phone? Why do you think I'm on the phone? Um?
I don't know, Like I'm so confused right now? Are
you at the store? No, she's not. This is actually
the Jewel Show. My name is Jewel fresh Mine's Alex
fresh Mind's English Evan, and your girlfriend, Michelle is on
(39:40):
the phone because she thought you might be cheating on
her with her sister named Emily and serious right now? Yeah? Serious?
Are you serious? Just sending my sister flowers? Yeah? I
(40:00):
mean yeah, I'm just like I'm talking to your sister. Sorry,
you told me you thought she was crazy? You've been
lying to me? Yeah, yeah, I guess, Like I don't know,
it's just we were like talking, like texting back and
forth and just like led to more. I don't know
(40:27):
what to tell you, Like, it's just it's just what's
going on right now. I can't believe this is happening again. Well,
Like Michelle, I mean, you're like always like checking on
me or always like checking in and doing stuff like this.
I mean, it's like, why wouldn't you I'm not, I
mean I wasn't at first and until you's like started
(40:51):
accusing me and Stoff and it's like we were just
like texting back and forth and she just like wouldn't
take no for an answer. So I don't know, it
just like started hanging out and you can also continue
to say no. You can also continue as they know
you have that power. Yeah, It's just it was really hard.
She's very very pressing individual. I don't know, she's uh, wow,
(41:16):
you don't know anymore. You know, you can't turn it
out your girlfriend's sister. Why can't her sister find her
own men? Yeah, it's the fact that you're like putting
it on Emily. Now, Yeah, it's her fault, but you
can literally say no, this is your fault, all right,
excusing you. And I've been checking up on you because
(41:39):
literally you've been cheating on me. I mean, but like
I haven't always been cheating on you, like it has
just that way. Yeah, it has. It's just been very recent,
Like you know, I talked to your sister, like she
isn't like she's not pressing for anything. She's just like
very easy to get along. Way. I don't know, I
(42:00):
just feel like we get along. This isn't making things like,
well guess what she's she's done this before, and the
moment I break up with you, which is right now,
by the way, she's done, stop talking to you. The
only reason that you want you is because I am
with you. Yeah, all right, okay, I mean we'll see
(42:20):
when that happens. Like, what else? Is there anything else
you guys need? I mean, what do you say? No? Nothing?
I mean nothing, dude. I think you've told us everything
we need to know. I just want to let you
know that the twenty percent discount is still good. You
could just go into the store and get it. Okay.
Oh my god, Michelle, Just like we talked about at
(42:42):
the beginning of this whole thing, I think you need
to get a new sister. Yeah. Time to cut Emily
off for real? Yeah yeah, I think I probably will.
I can't keep doing this anymore. Thanks for the helps, guys,
no problem, and you will find someone out there who
won't cheat with your sister, And hopefully you'll find a
(43:04):
sister who won't want to cheat with I don't know
if that was possible, but anyway, things will get better.
Thanks guys. Yeah, the Jewel shows were of the roses.
The Jewel Show on demand. Dexter is dead? What it's
the Jewel Show? Who's Dexter? Dexter is not dead. That's
a text that somebody got and it's made national news
(43:27):
and it's going viral because that's a text that a
dog owner got from a groomer on accident. It was
a mistext. They meant to text him the height Dexter
is ready because they were grooming him, and the accidentally
texted him Dexter is dead and you posted online to
a viral and then there's text after that was like
a picture of Dexter the dog at the groomer like proof,
(43:48):
Hey look he's still alive. And okay, wow, that's embarrassing.
Text in four one o six one calls up add
eight three four three one oh six one. That unfortunate
mistext leads us to the question, what's the most awkward
miss text you've ever sent? And that's how you do it.
That is how you make broadcast industry interesting. History is
(44:08):
you see a story like that? History? Yeah, Like there's
a Hall of Fame me in there one day, You're saying,
because the transition was so good, because it's just genius
to see a story like that online, and they'd be like,
why don't we do a topic about it, because a
lot of people have awkward miss texts that they've sent.
I can't even think of like a time where I
sent a mistext. I know I have, but I don't
remember what I said. But I received one from my
(44:29):
ex husband that said I love you yeah recently, too recently,
and he was like texting his girlfriend something and then
he sent it to me because like we had just
been texting not too long before that, and I didn't respond.
I'm like, I knew that he meant to send it
to his girlfriend. I'm like, that's skworth gosh, waite did
he wrote like a couple of hours later, and I
was like, sorry, I'm in there for my girlfriend. Yeah,
(44:50):
like I hope. So super awkward when you said the
text like that and then you can't you don't notice
it for a while and then you check and you're like,
oh my goodness, yeah, I told my ex wife that
I loved her. A couple hours I did reply, right,
I'm like a girlfriend probably didn't respond. He's like, why
didn't respond? And then when I when it came in,
I said, I love you. I showed it to Jewel
and I was like, ah, I was like, that's hilarious.
It's gonna be so embarrassed right now. Three one six one, Sean,
(45:13):
what's up? How are you? Hey? I'm good? How much?
Just um? Talking about texting people are awkward texts? Oh
my god, Well, I accidentally text someone something that I
wasn't supposed to text, and it was crazy. I text,
(45:33):
I choked on a goat this morning, and that's not
what I meant to text. Joke on a goat? Is
what you said? Yes, I choked on a goat this morning.
I'm trying to think what you No, No, no, well no,
I actually meant to say I choked on toast this morning.
(45:55):
Choked on toast. Why did you text that too? Oh
my god, my boss, Oh that's not ideal. You just
texted your boss I choked on a goat this morning. Yes,
I'm assuming the boss was pretty confused. Extremely what did
they say back? Oh my god? He text me back
(46:17):
and it said, are you taking a six day? Yeah?
That's a good question. I guess if I had an
employee that said they choked on a goat, I'd be like,
you probably can't make it into work then, right right,
all right, well, thank you very phone call, Thank you?
One six one T What was the miss text that
you sent? So I sent my best friend then I
(46:40):
killed her at the front door, Oh hopefully, and you're
not a murderer. I am not a murderer. I meant
to write kissed her at the front door, but I
texted it while I was going into a meeting. So
my friend just was on hold basically for two hours
of my life before I responded back like oops, like
(47:01):
spelling there. So he's sit there like, oh my god,
he's like holding all my friends to make sure. I
was like just joking, or you're lucky he didn't cool
the cops. Yeah, because he weren't able to text back
for two hours. He had to be like, oh dude,
he's he's fleeing the country or I don't know, that's
why he's my best friend. Eight three one to six
one all of What was the mistext that you sent?
(47:23):
Oh my god, it's so embarrassing. I texted my best
friend verbatim. It said Um, I'm going to sleep on
my dad's body this weekend. Oh, sleep on your dad's
body this weekend. I'm glad that was a mistext. What
were you trying to say? Um? Well, he certainly wasn't
trying to admit that. I was trying because I was
(47:45):
sleeping on my dad's boat boat boat like, extend the
invite to my best friend. And instead she responded and
just said kinky with a wink face. What he said? No, thanks,
been there, done that? Yeah? More awkward. No, I wouldn't
be the best friend to do jump off the boat
(48:06):
with Cement shows on that one. All right, call us
up made three four three one six one, text in
four on sixth one. What's the most unfortunate mistext you've
ever sent? The Jebils Show on demand, Jebils Dirty Little Secret.
Today's dirty little secret will make your piece mouth funny? Yeah, yes, yes,
asparagus is on the phone. Remember we give everybody a
(48:28):
fake anonymous nicknames. You want to tellus a dirty little secret,
all you have to do is text in four one
six one. You can tell us anything. We keep everybody anonymous.
We don't even ask what your name is. That's why
you get a fake name when you call in, and
Alex knew exactly where I was going with that. Asparagus
is on the phone. Hello, asparagus. Hey, this is asparagus.
All right. You're delicious, by the way. Yeah, i'd like
to point that out. Thanks, except if I forget that
(48:50):
I eat you and I wake up in the morning
to go to the bathroom, I'm like, oh my god,
what's wrong with me? Problem? And I'm like, oh wait,
oh that's oh good. I just ad asparagus last nime.
All right, So you have a dirty little secret you'd
like to tell us about asparagus. Yeah, So my dirty
little secret is that I have an odd kind of collection.
(49:11):
So when I was in high school, we had a
health class and they gave out free condoms to all
the students, nice and I held on to that one. Yeah.
I was like, great, I might have to use this,
and so I like put it in a box. And
(49:33):
then I kept collecting different kinds of condoms everywhere I went, Like,
if I went to the drug store, I'd be like, well,
maybe I'll just pick up these. So yeah, and you
go through the condom miisle and the grocery store or wherever,
and you're just like, oh that and you have a
collection all. I got to think about that one yet.
Remember like when your teens can go to the walking
(49:53):
clinic and you get free condoms, like on the counter,
there's all of them. Yeah, did you steal all those? Yeah?
They like anyone that I hadn't had before I took.
Or like you know, in a like a bar, if
you go into the bathroom and there's like maybe weird ones,
you know, ribbed her her Pleasure or for those weird
(50:13):
brands that you've never heard of. Yeah, yeah, where you're
like knocker brand condoms and I've never heard of them.
What's your best one? The one that you're most proud
of in your collection? Um, the one that's my favorite.
Actually when you unroll it, it says your name here
on it. Wow, that's incredible. So you have a big
(50:37):
collection of really random condoms. Uh, yeah, that's true. It's
a pretty big collection. But that's uh, that's not actually
my dirtiest little secret. Even want to know, Yeah, what
did you do with these condoms? Well, the problem is
that I didn't do anything with it. My action is
(51:00):
so big because I actually still a virgin. You've never
even used one at all before other than maybe probably
blown them up in pop m Yeah, yeah, I've I'm
half of them have expired at this point. Oh my god,
keep collecting. I think that's an amazing collection. Yeah, I
(51:22):
mean as a conversation starter, it's a weird one. But
maybe it'll work one day. Maybe. I'd hate to say
this too, asparagus, but you sound like, you know, relatively
mature in terms of age. How has it just not
never happened or you know what's been the problem? Yeah?
I don't. I don't know. I can never seem to
like get over the friendship hump. And I like what
(51:46):
you did there and when that does happen. Um, you
know a lot about protection, right because you've been collecting
it since you were very young, and I'm all kinds
of different ones. Have you heard of the trojan extended
pleasure ones who yes, yeah, but like a numbing thing
in it so that oh so you can you can
last last for a little bit longer, longer longer than second. Yeah,
(52:09):
they make a spray too, so they Oh my god,
yeah so that you Yeah, so they don't seek a
last longer. But it's not good though. I bet that's
not good for you. No, I mean it's not good
as far as how it makes you feel, because it
sounds like a good idea, like, oh, this could help out,
you know, I can maybe last a little bit longer
than a TV commercial maybe, right, But then you use
(52:32):
it and then nothing works because it's like if you know,
if you go to the dentist, right and your shot
of novacane. Oh yeah, it feels like that party you
went to the dentist and it just will not work.
Oh okay, don't get the spray kidding. Yeah. They then
all right, well, thank you for your dirty little secret? Yeah?
Thanks good? What's your dirty little secret? The Jewil Show
(52:56):
on demand and remember anything you missed on the show,
you can always find it at the Jewil Show on
TikTok and Instagram, or you can follow all of us individually.
I'm at Jewel Fresh. My name is pell j U
b al No, he never knows how to spell it,
So there you go. Mind's at Thatrea's mind's at Evan
on the radio. And we never like to break the
news to you, so we'll let Kim k do it
for us. And I just want you guys know, like
(53:16):
how much we really appreciate you guys, Each and every
one of you are spending time away from your families
to be with our crazy family. All right, we'll see
you later. It's a jewel show.
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