May 26, 2025 • 46 mins
Do you need a fashion overhaul? Some grown-up clothes. Grown-up attitude. Grown-up advice? Holly Wainwright did, and she knew exactly who to call for a gentle roasting and some no-bullshit advice: Grace Lam.
You might remember Grace because she’s our first-ever repeat guest on MID. The fashion stylist, former Senior Fashion Editor of VOGUE China for a decade, was on MID Season Two talking about hormones, because as well as being a style guru, she’s an incredible advocate for women going through Peri and menopause.
And if you heard that episode, you know she’s sweary, forthright and funny as hell.
Grace has recently relocated from Perth to Melbourne to continue her bespoke styling & shopping consultancy, and so we thought it might be the moment to call her up for some no bullshit advice for all of us: about grown-up style, shopping and spending and definitely, definitely NOT “dressing your age”.
Enjoy this conversation with the exceptionally stylish Grace Lam about clothes, fashion, fun, and not giving an F about what you SHOULD wear.
Want to see the pics of Holly that Grace critiqued? Follow us here: https://www.instagram.com/midbymamamia/
Follow Grace Lam & book her for your OWN style makeover, here: https://www.instagram.com/gracelamstyle/
Listen to our first episode with Grace on menopause here.
CREDITS:
Host: Holly Wainwright
Guest: Grace Lam
Executive Producer: Naima Brown
Senior Producer: Grace Rouvray
Producer: Tahli Blackman
Audio Producer: Jacob Round
Our studio is styled with furniture from Fenton and Fenton visit.
Mamamia acknowledges the Traditional Owners of the Land we have recorded this podcast on, the Gadigal people of the Eora Nation. We pay our respects to their Elders past and present, and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
You're listening to a MoMA Mia podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Mamma Mere acknowledges the traditional owners of land and waters
that this podcast is recorded on. Skinny jeans are out,
but all maybe they're in again. Heels are too try hard,
but trainers, well, they have to be right. Ballet shoes
are back, but twiddle at ankles only.
Speaker 3 (00:31):
Please. Socks.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
You've got to wear socks, but those are too long,
and those are too short. That color isn't your season.
Those earrings are too big, No, sorry, too small? Big
colorful glasses. Let you wear black, but you don't want
to look like one of those women in big colorful glasses.
What's next a chunky necklace? I'm mid wardrobe confusion. I
(00:57):
want to look like me, but also not like me,
because me likes the same things I liked when I
was twenty one. I'm thirty one and forty one jeans
and frocks and everything blue and apparently dressing like you
with breaking fashion laws in several states and certainly in
the Big Book of fashion rules we all internalized as teens.
(01:20):
Don't show too much flesh, but don't be a nun.
Lengthen your legs, whittle your waist trick the eye into
what a twenty year delusion, perhaps where what I wear
makes me feel great and confident, capable and strong, sexy,
perhaps comfy, cool French not falling into a trap of comfy,
(01:43):
cozy midlife dressing that only adds to the whole invisible
woman effect that comes with.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
The last zero birthday.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
Find me a look please that makes me not double
take when I pass a shop window.
Speaker 3 (01:55):
Wait, that's me now?
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Is it too much to ask?
Speaker 3 (02:01):
Hello?
Speaker 2 (02:02):
I'm Holly Wainwright and I am mid midlife, mid family,
mid fashion crisis. Welcome to our new episode, which could
be called What to Wear when You're not a fetus?
Grown up clothes, grown up attitude, grown up advice. When
I decided it was time for a fashion overhaul, you know,
a grown up one, I knew exactly who to call
(02:22):
for a gentle roasting and some new bullshit advice. Grace Lamb.
You might remember Grace because she's our first ever repeat
guest on mid The fashion stylist who was a former
senior fashion editor at Vogue China for a decade, was
on Mid season two talking about hormones. Because as well
as being a style guru, she's an incredible advocate for
(02:44):
women going through perry and menopause, and if you heard
that episode, you know Grace is sweary, forthright and funny
as hell. Grace has recently moved from Perth to Melbourne
to continue her bespoke styling and shopping consultancy, and so
I thought it might be the perfect moment to call
her up for some no bullshit advice for me, for you,
(03:05):
for all of us about grown up style shopping and
spending and definitely definitely not dressing your age. Before we spoke,
I sent Grace a whole folder full of mirror selfies
I'd taken over a long period of time of me
wearing clothes, and as you'll hear, her feedback was real.
Enjoy this conversation with the exceptionally stylish Grace Lamb about clothes, fashion,
(03:28):
fun and not giving an f about what.
Speaker 3 (03:31):
You should wear.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
Grace Lamb, before we sat down for this conversation, now
and middle listeners know you from our wonderful conversation about
menopause last year. But after I spoke to you, I
was like, if there's one woman who's going to tell
it to me straight about clothes, style, fashion in this
point of my life.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
It's grace.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
I sent you a whole folder of pictures of me,
like just things I normally wear to work, a couple
of things i'd wear around the house. I think one
or two, like going out outfits. Be honest, critique my style.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
I mean to be honest. They weren't as bad as
I imagined. You told me.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
We don't know.
Speaker 3 (04:09):
Yah, it's a compliment or not.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
You told me to be brutal. I'm going to tell
it how it is. Some of the style, the mix
and match are really good, but I think you just
need to tweak it a little bit.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
Great because I think we'll, obviously said the listeners, No,
we'll put some of these pictures up on our socials
so we can see. But also a lot of our
lists probably have seen me on socials and stuff. There
are a few things I rely on all the time,
right jeans, wide legged jeans, silk shirts, things like that.
I think that they make me look grown up and
(04:40):
a little bit cool.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
Am I right? Am?
Speaker 2 (04:42):
I wrong?
Speaker 1 (04:42):
One hundred percent? But I think you can go even
wider on your jeans. So I used to be a
very skinny jeans girl, because I've got quite sim legs,
and I think last year, or at least the past
few months, I started wearing more baggy jeans and it
changed the whole game. And I implement it on my
(05:04):
well with all my clients in per because I just
moved from Perth to Melbourne and it's a game. So
I saw on your picture your jeans are are pretty white,
wider than like a skinny jeans, but it needs to
be even wider on the legs or even some of it.
You can. You can buy a few pair, like I
think jeans you can have different colors, different style for
(05:26):
different locations. So I have a pair because living in Perth,
there's not many choices to go shopping. So I was
looking for like a high wasted white jeans, like a
lighter blue color. Of all places, I found it in
Targets and it was very reasonable. People don't think, oh,
how can you stop with Target? You know you're like
used to work a vote. I'm like, so fucking what.
(05:47):
That doesn't mean that I can't shop at Target?
Speaker 3 (05:48):
You know?
Speaker 1 (05:49):
Does that mean I can't shop in secondhand clothes? I mean,
gonna be ridiculous. So I found this high waisted jeans
very seventy style quite wide for target kind of you know, demographic,
and it works really well because it just makes me
look thinner in the middle and makes my leg look longer.
And by the way, i'm if I've got five and
(06:10):
it makes me look even taller in photos for some reason.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
So you know, a lot of women are scared if
they were wearing skinny jeans in their say, twenties and
thirties and it made them feel good, and that they
get a bit scared.
Speaker 3 (06:23):
They're like, oh, but if I break.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Out of that, maybe I'm going to look really big
and dumpy, or maybe I'm going to look like I'm
trying to be cool. Do you think it's really crucial
to not kind of get wedded to these stories we
tell ourselves, like skinny jeans make me look skinny one
hundred percent.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
Don't give a fuck what other people think women, I mean,
how old are we We're we're in our forties, fifties
and even sixties above. Why do we care about what
other people think about what we wear? I mean, life's
too short. Just wear whatever fuck you want, That's what
I'm saying. I say to all my clients, well, and
they always say to me, oh, don't you think there's
a bit too young for me? Don't you think I
look like you know, I'm trying to be younger. I'm like,
(06:59):
why do you care what other people think? Honestly, don't
give a fuck what other people think. Just go with
your instinct if you feel good. And this is the
one sentence I teach all my clients who are like,
especially middle age. When they ask me, do you think
this is too young for me? I always say to
them no, because you need to wear what makes you
(07:19):
happy and fuck what everyone says, and you tell these
people you'll be wearing that next year. Bitch, I love it.
Speaker 3 (07:29):
So do you think back to my like denim silk shirts? Whatever?
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Do you think if you're not like super confident with fashion,
but you don't want to be boring, do you think
it's helpful for grown up.
Speaker 3 (07:39):
Women to like me?
Speaker 2 (07:40):
Then think about it like key pieces I'm gonna build around.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
Oh yeah, definitely. I always say wide leg jeans for
middle aged women because it makes you look more trendy,
and also it is so diverse. Don't think skinny jeans
is gonna be you look skinny. Sometimes I look at
women because this is what I do on the street.
When I see women, I always say to them, oh,
I wish I could tell her that to cut her shoulder,
and sometimes I do. I'll go up to the woman
go you look fabulous, but I think you look better
(08:05):
with shutter hair, and they go, oh my god.
Speaker 3 (08:07):
People. I was going to say, what the people say
when you do that grace.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
Sometimes they're shocked, and sometimes they find it really helpful
because that's all they know, whereas I don't know any
of these people. They're strangers. So when I walk on
the street, or if I sit on a tram or
the train, whatever and stuff, I imagine how I would style
these people. And if I feel like friendly that day,
or you know, if I had my charity, then I
(08:32):
feel great. Then I'll go up to people say hey,
you look great, but I think you look even better
if you cut your hair to a bob or if
you wear like white legged jeans, and people are like,
You'll naturally be like, who's this weirdo? But then once
we start a conversation, I mean, I'm very good at talking,
as you can tell, so they we just get into
this whole conversation and then I'll just give them a
field tips, and I'm like.
Speaker 2 (08:52):
Seeyah, oh, I would love that as long as no
one's telling me that I look terrible, but they're telling
me you look good, but you could look even better.
Speaker 3 (08:58):
That's such a good intro.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
But as we age, I mean, I used to be
such a bitch when I was. I'm not saying I'm
not anymore, but I still am. But I choose my
words carefully now. You know. It's all about compassion. So
no one likes to be tall. You're not like shit,
So it's how you say to people.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
Do you think it's helpful like, because sometimes when you're
getting a bit older, you feel a bit rocky in
your identity. We talked about that a bit with we're
talking about menopause last time. Do you think it's helpful
to have like a story to tell yourself about what.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
Style you want?
Speaker 1 (09:30):
You know?
Speaker 2 (09:30):
Like that we went We had this thing on out
loud a while ago where we were talking about the
three word theory and it was something like, chwose three
words that sum up your style? And I can't even
remember what mine were, but I think one of them
was easy.
Speaker 3 (09:43):
French.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
I think I picked up, which me thought was hilarious.
Because she was like, you're not French.
Speaker 1 (09:51):
One.
Speaker 2 (09:54):
I can't remember what the other relaxed or something, But like,
do you think it's useful to have like.
Speaker 3 (09:59):
A sort of style story for yourself?
Speaker 1 (10:02):
I wake up every morning depends on my mood obviously,
you know, because we're going through perimon pause. If I
had really good night's sleep, I feel a lot more
energized and a lot more brave and fun that morning.
I'm a very colorful person, so I like to dress
in all sorts of colors, even some of the colors
(10:24):
I don't normally wear, like a bright fusion pink or green.
So I try to force myself out of my own
comfort zone. So I would say fun colors and brave
every day. So that's kind of like my motto, and
I always tell my clients that you need to break
out of your comfort zone otherwise you don't even know
(10:46):
what kind of world is out there in terms of
like fashion and style. It's the same. It's like if
you eat fish and chips every day, like you know,
we both live in the UK. If you eat fish
and chips all your life, how do you know that
there's Chinese food, Japanese friends, you know, and it's just
a whole new world out there, and I think, sorry,
back to I tend to go of attention back to
your own question about the key pieces. I honestly feel
every woman needs to have a pair of a few
(11:08):
pair of like and style jeans, different colors black, like
denim black or white, even a pair of really stylish loafersts,
you know, because I mean I can't. I used to run.
I could used to be able to run in my
high heels to catch a bus or weather in London.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
Well that's because you worked at Vogue, mate, Yeah, you
could run in high heels.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
So I haven't worn high heels for ages since you know,
living in Perth is very rare I get to wear
my high heels. So nowadays it's also a trend to
wear more like flats or trainers or loafers. So really
invest into a really cool pair of loafers and you
can wear. And I'm a huge fan of like colorful socks.
Socks makes a huge difference to a look, So invest
in a lot of colorful socks, a lot of fun socks.
(11:50):
I buy all my socks from Japan. They're just so
much fun. And also, you know, I have loads of jewelry.
I stack myself with loads of jewery, and multi stacking
is the thing for me. So sometimes people, I saw
some of your pictures, you wore like two necklaces. It's great,
but I would even stack and just still over the
top because jewelry makes a huge it hance at Haunt.
Speaker 3 (12:12):
I know I'm not very good at accessories.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
I need to get better at accessories, which is every
single woman need to do. Can I, because you know
I'm going to be making notes, copious notes, as I'm
sure our listeners are. Can I push you on the
loafers a second? I feel like I'm allergic to black shoes.
I don't like black shoes. Generally speaking, what color are
my loafers to make the most versatile?
Speaker 1 (12:34):
Black is the most diverse in a way, because if
you wear why don't you like black shoes?
Speaker 3 (12:39):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
I always feel like I think I've always really because
you know, I said I'm not good at accessories, but
I really like shoes, and I often buy colorful shoes
or brown. But you think that am I missing a
classic trick on just not going for the If I'm
going to invest in some loafers, they should just be black.
Speaker 1 (12:55):
You can buy a few pets. I mean, I'm not
saying that every person needs to buy design yourself. Of
course they're better made and all that stuff, but there's
loads of high shipt brands that do really good shoes
as well, like loafers, which I've seen. And if you
don't like black, try brown first. I think the darker
color it is the easier to match with different things.
But then at the same time, you know, if you're
feeling adventuress, definitely go for red or white even and
(13:20):
loafers goes so well with like socks that I always
wear the Michael Jackson style black loafers with white socks,
sometimes like poker dot, like transparent socks, sometimes that completely
like solid white. It just gives you that kind of
like preppy school girl kind of back to school. I mean,
who wants to go back to school? No one. But
at the same time, game, it's just a fun touch
(13:42):
to an outfit.
Speaker 2 (13:45):
After this shortbreak, Grace gives it to me straight and
tells me what I've been wearing that needs to go
to the style graveyard.
Speaker 3 (13:51):
Back in a tick.
Speaker 2 (13:54):
So, having looked at myselfies and you've been generous. What
should I throw in the bin? What am I wearing
that does not work for me?
Speaker 1 (14:01):
I hate ugly shoes and I saw a few ugly
shoes that you have. I'm like, you know what, you
need to bin those motherfucking shoes.
Speaker 3 (14:07):
Man, like my floggy wooden cloggy ones.
Speaker 1 (14:12):
You have a pair of red shoes, which I love
the color, but it's just a style. It just looks too.
It reminds me of like, really like a strep shoe.
What's that called? That brand?
Speaker 2 (14:24):
Is like my red sandals, like the sort of cage
sandal ones.
Speaker 1 (14:28):
Oh yeah, those gotta go. Those gotta go.
Speaker 3 (14:30):
Oh yes, no no, oh I like those.
Speaker 1 (14:34):
No, if you want to keep them, then just wear
fun socks underneath. Please.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
Okay, yes, but that's fine.
Speaker 1 (14:40):
Computer says no, no, no.
Speaker 3 (14:42):
No, computer says no on the sandals. That's fair crops.
Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
Yeah, sorry, it reminds me of like, you know, crops,
but not in a good way. I'm just not a
fan of crocs. I mean, anyone older than age five
shoe were crops?
Speaker 3 (14:59):
Fair enough?
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Okay, So we're getting rid of them. We're getting rid
of the ugly shoes and going for some loafers. What
are the common mistakes? And I hate saying mistakes because
it's like getting dressed is a test, you know. But
as women get older, what are the common mistakes that
they make about their clothes? Do you think or the
women you see that they want to change.
Speaker 1 (15:18):
So my clients will come to me for advice and
we go, you know, I go to the home to
redo the wardrobe, edit their clothes, and then we go
shopping together. Most of them are so safe to the
point that they think that I'm like too outrageous. I'm like,
you ain't seen nothing yet. This is like my normal data.
I think women are too safe, Like we need to
(15:42):
branch out and explore. I mean, fashion is one of
the few things you can be adventurous and experimental. And
there's no right or wrong in fashion. There's only good
tastes and bad taste. It's important to explore, you know,
try different things, and it's all try an error, right,
So what if you wear something that you don't like
(16:02):
or you look shit in it, you just take it off.
It's so easy, but you need to try something new.
I say to my clients all the time. Every time
you dress, you think of me, what will grace them?
Do would grace them approve of this look? Or she
will go come on, you can do better than this, mate,
you know, So always push yourself every day and the
minute you go outside to the street the one person.
(16:25):
Not that we always seek for validation, but it's nice
to have someone compliment you. Oh, really like your look,
really like your shoes, really like your hair. It makes
you feel good, right, and then you practice that and
you do more and more each day.
Speaker 3 (16:38):
It's interesting.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
But what you said before about this is a space
where give yourself permission to have fun and experiment, because
I think that a little bit like food and other things,
we can be very emotional about clothes in terms of
I can't have fun with it because it's sort of
caught up in my self esteem, you know what I mean, Like, oh,
what if I look like I'm trying to be too young,
(17:00):
or it doesn't suit my body or whatever, and we
get very emotional about it. So you're kind of saying,
give yourself permission to just treat it like fun.
Speaker 1 (17:09):
And also, women get told. We get told since a
young age, oh you're too fat, you're too this, you know,
you're not good enough or weave and stuff. It's like,
fuck them, Who the fuck are you to tell me
what I should look like and not wear and where
it's none of your business? And as I said, you'll
be wearing that next year, bitch.
Speaker 3 (17:30):
All right. I want to touch on colors a little
bit because we were.
Speaker 2 (17:34):
Briefly obsessed with color theory in the Mama Mir office
last year and everyone got their colors done. And what
was funny is I've always been, as you can probably
tell from what I said to you I was wearing
and what I'm wearing right now, I love blue like
I love it right. But when I had my colors done,
the woman was like, actually, that blue isn't for you.
Speaker 3 (17:53):
You should be.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
Wearing paler colors or whatever. Do you think it's crucial
to understand what colors work for you or you shouldn't
restrict yourself and you should just go with what you like.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
Sometimes worth people with their skin color, like I don't
think I look good in yellow, but I will still
buy things yellow just because I want myself to get
used to the color. Then it's easier for me to
work on my color palette. So let's say, for example,
my red lips I'm wearing lipstick today, and I've been
wearing for like probably like twenty years or so. The
(18:26):
first time I put on this red lipey, I was like,
oh my god, I look like an Asian hole, you know,
Like it was just so it was so much, and
I was like, oh my god, if I stand on
a street corner, someone's gonna ask me how much. And
I was like, I shouldn't do that. But then as
the day goes past, I do it every day every day,
and now when I don't do a red lipey, I
(18:48):
kind of feel like I look ill. So it's all
bu pro perspective. And if you like the color, you're
going to make it work. It's the same thing. It's
like you're going to make You know, you're not going
to make a cake one time and then give up.
If you don't make it good, right, You're going to
keep trying and tweak it a bit, and then maybe
if let's say the blue that your your friends or
(19:08):
colleagues said that you don't it doesn't suit you, then
maybe okay, I'm going to try a necklace a blue
necklace instead, something small I can just take off, right,
just try. I always say to people try something small
and just graduate, you know, increase the volume, Increase the
amount on your body from a necklace to like a
complete T shirt and then to a whole dress. You know,
(19:29):
the color that you dislike or you're not used to.
It's all about getting used to style and fashion in colors.
Speaker 3 (19:36):
Do you think getting your colors done is a good thing? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (19:39):
Why not? I mean, as I said, do whatever makes
you happy. And also another very important point, especially in
mid live women, we need to own our looks and
we need to own it big because if you let's
say you're at home and you feel so good about
your outfit and you go out and you walk like
you know, everyone's like you're really sheepish. Now you're going
(20:01):
to go out and walk like like you're a million
dollars because your aura will come off and it will spread.
It's all about comfort. You need to be confident you
own your outfit.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
Having looked at the selfies, I said, you were there
any colors you think I should not be wearing?
Speaker 1 (20:16):
I mean there were so many girlfriends I kind of forgot.
Speaker 3 (20:21):
What I love.
Speaker 1 (20:22):
I love the outfit of was it like a pestel jacket?
Speaker 3 (20:27):
The pink?
Speaker 1 (20:28):
Yes, the pink coat with the was it purple trousers
or pink trousers?
Speaker 3 (20:33):
Yeah, yeah, like a magenta trouser.
Speaker 1 (20:35):
And then you put a black shirt underneath. Okay, that
look is good, but the black shirts too safe. You
should you should work tone on tone, like a very
similar tone but in different shades, or even like a
pink color that is the same family, the pestel colored family,
and then just tweet it. And then you wear like
do you have ear piers ye, or and then you
(20:55):
have like like a pestel bright color yellow ear rings
or like a necklace, loads of bracelets. It just it
just geled the whole whole thing together. Dial it all up, yes,
and then like a little fusion pink bag or something,
you know, just to top of it all, or like
a very colorful pair of trainers.
Speaker 3 (21:15):
You know.
Speaker 2 (21:15):
That's a good example of what I was talking about before,
because all my life, I don't really I'm not a
big fan of pastel pink. But I'm a blonde, and
I know people say it looks good, but I've never
liked it. But whenever I wear that coat, and I've
also got a pair of pink pants, whenever I wear
those everybody always says, oh, so maybe it's true, Like
I think I don't like pink, but maybe Pink likes
me exactly.
Speaker 1 (21:36):
Just try, just try it, and then you know you're
gonna feel good. People gonna compliment you. It makes you
feel even better.
Speaker 3 (21:41):
Now.
Speaker 2 (21:41):
The women who come to you and want your help,
what are they most What do they most commonly want
help with? Like what's going on with them and their
fashion and their clothes that they think, right, I really
need some help?
Speaker 3 (21:54):
Here are they?
Speaker 2 (21:54):
Is it because they're stuck? Is it because they feel
crappy about themselves?
Speaker 1 (21:58):
Like?
Speaker 3 (21:58):
What do they want your help with?
Speaker 1 (22:00):
So I get a lot of mid like women contacting
me about the wardrobe and style. Is because the waistline
have expended and we all have the men belly, so
nothing fits anymore, So they just have no idea how
to wear or what to wear. I think for work
it's a bit easier for them because they go down
this very very normal way of dressing for work. I
(22:23):
think it's the casual style that they all get stuck,
because I'm even sometimes for myself when I go casual,
I feel a little bit like to to casual, so
you don't feel silent, but there are ways of doing it.
I would also recommend in your go to list to
buy for essential items for the wardrobe. It's a pair
(22:44):
of really cool tracks of bottoms. I'm not talking about
Vicki polar style. I'm talking about, like, you know, a
big baggier. I have a pair of like Adidas Tracts
of bottom, which I love. Sometimes I actually wear high
heels and at the bottom of the trousers you can
unzip the top right up to your calf, so it
makes the legs look even bigger, like wider, so it's
(23:07):
not narrow. I think narrow makes you look a bit odd,
you know, proportion wise, especially for like my height.
Speaker 3 (23:13):
Five o five.
Speaker 1 (23:14):
So when I zip the side at the bottom of
my pants, it just makes me look cooler. And I
can wear like really funky trainers, funky socks. Sometimes I
wear high heels just to like you know, do like
a Vikie pool up glamorous style. So that's really good tips.
I think doesnitely invest into like a really cool TRECs
of bottoms wide legs.
Speaker 3 (23:35):
You're right that casual style is harder as you get older.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
I think it is.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
Because you just and it's interesting what you just said
about bodies, right, because, as I'm sure you probably see
from my pictures, but my weight goes up and down
a bit, and my wardrobe has to stretch and contract
to deal with that. What's your take on like wardrobe edit?
You know, should you keep those clothes that?
Speaker 3 (23:56):
You know?
Speaker 2 (23:56):
How some women have a I'm going to get back
into that part of their wardrobe or they have a
like they kind of can't decide.
Speaker 3 (24:03):
What's your take on that?
Speaker 2 (24:04):
Do you think we should throw out a lot of
clothes that make us feel less?
Speaker 3 (24:08):
Then?
Speaker 1 (24:08):
So I'm the worst per to us because I'm Maria
Kondor like crazy, I'm so.
Speaker 3 (24:13):
Brute you are you don't clutter?
Speaker 1 (24:14):
No, No, I'm not a holder like my home, we
don't hold, you know? Is that my pet peeve? So
I am very brutal when it comes to my wardrobe,
maybe sometimes too brutal. So when social media send me reminders,
I'm like, why the hell did I give that away?
Is so cool? You know? But anyway, it's only things.
Doesn't matter. I would say, if you have a favorite
(24:36):
piece of sentimental value, then keep it. But at the
same time, you need to be realistic. And I'm a
very realistic stylist. So I tell people, if you have
something for more than two years that you don't touch
or wear, that's got to go because otherwise it's just
gonna like clutter. And you know, we need good energy
even in your wardrobe. So you know what you have
(24:58):
the problem with people like my sister, my second sister,
she's a complete holder. She has shoes from like nineteen eighties,
and so you know, do you remember that brand Burlington
socks from you? Okay, yes, he has Burlington socks. Back
in the day when we're all in boarding school, I'm like,
are you kidding? Like, why would you keep like forty
year old socks? That's disgusting. Definitely don't hold because it's
(25:21):
not necessary. And I don't know, I'm a very brutal editor,
so I definitely don't like to keep things that I
don't wear because it's just pointless.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
Does it make getting dressed easier?
Speaker 1 (25:33):
Too?
Speaker 2 (25:34):
Like, do you think that you kind of need to
have a wardrobe of high rotation things and then things.
Speaker 3 (25:39):
That need to go?
Speaker 2 (25:40):
Like do you think that's a key to getting dressed
easily in the world?
Speaker 1 (25:43):
Now, I think what you need is time. If you
can spare like twenty minutes every night if you can
to work out what you're going to wear the next day.
You know, obviously check the weather report all of that
and stuff, because I think the problem with people is
when they're in the rush, they obviously don't have a
clear mind, and they put on whatever, and then they
look like shit, and then they feel shit, and then
the whole day shit.
Speaker 3 (26:04):
Yeah, so I think that sounds familiar.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
Just be very organized and trying to organize your outfit,
or even just do it on like a Sunday night
when the kids go to bed, say you know what,
I'm going to play my whole week outfit. You know,
just losey. So it's not like a mad rush in
the morning.
Speaker 2 (26:24):
Friends, when we come back, Grace is going to help
us decide what we need to add to our wardrobe
and an affordable accessible and because it's Grace Lamb, no bullshit, way,
don't go anywhere.
Speaker 3 (26:38):
We've talked about.
Speaker 2 (26:39):
This a little bit in terms of the wide leg
jeans and the good tracky pants and the loafers. But
if you're in a bit of a style run, obviously
you know times are tough. We can't all afford a
lot of new clothes. But what are the few things
that will refresh your wardrobe, as in, will help you
wear things you've already got, Like, what are the key
pieces that you should do that with.
Speaker 1 (26:59):
So I'm a huge fan of pre loved clothing. I
mean when I lived in London most of my life
and in Nottinghill Gate, so I go to Posabola every weekend.
And being Chinese, we aren't well. My mom's generation and
my grandmother they are not into second hand clothes. So
when I used to come back from London to Hong
Kong to visit them, I would deacktight in all my
like cool notting Hill outfit, you know, Like I remember
(27:22):
my twin sisters. No, my big sister's wedding, I wore
like a really gorgeous pre love dress from New York
and I said to my mom, oh my god, I
love this dress. Is pre love a secondhand She was like,
why would you? Why would you buy that? We're not poor.
You know you should have told me you need money.
Some people might die in it. You're wearing dead people's clothes.
Speaker 3 (27:43):
I'm like, oh my god, that kind.
Speaker 1 (27:44):
Of mentality is crazy, right, But nowadays even Chinese people
have changed, so we're more into like pre love secondhand
and also for the environment. You can buy your whole
wardrobe with secondhand shops in an op shop. So when
I was in Perth, I do like a monthly giveaway
with Red Cross. So I would go to an op
shop once a month and then provide like a free
(28:07):
service for an hour and a half two hours to
one lucky winner on my Instagram. So I do this
giveaway and it's amazing how you watch these women because
they have no idea how to like, I mean, it's
a lot. I mean, I'm a stylist and I've been
doing this for like over twenty five years, and it's
a lot for me to go into that shop because
it's just so much to take so much stuff. You
just don't even know where to start, right. But when
(28:29):
they come with me, they realize and you can see
their brain and start processing and just like going through
Oh oh really I can do that. Oh I would
have never picked that. And throughout the whole an hour
and a half two hours, I see the changes in
the way they think. It's the most beautiful thing ever,
just to watch women click in their own head of
breaking out of the comfort zone and going to another
(28:52):
dimension with fashion and dressing.
Speaker 2 (28:54):
And you think with secondhand shops, is that like do
you think it's good for basics? Do you think it's
good for dressy things? Like what's your when you go
into a new like through place that you've never been
in before, what do you make a b line for?
Like the men's jackets? Is it the jeans? Like what's
great knop shops?
Speaker 1 (29:13):
So I bought three massive shirt from a n op
shop a few months ago in Perth. They're like massive,
they're like ex men's size shirt and I just wear
like a dress and just things like that. You know,
you can tweak it a bit, you know, just because
it's in the men's section doesn't mean women can't wear it.
And I think when you go into these shops, first
(29:37):
thing you need to think of is not get overwhelmed,
because then you're going to create like a negative energy
and you're not going to find anything. And also, don't
bring your children, don't bring your husband or partner. Just
go by yourself and spend at least two hours because
it's so much to intake. Start with something that you need.
So let's say, if you need a dress, go to
(29:58):
the dress section and just go through it like bit
by bit. If it gets overwhelmed, go to another session,
look at something different, and then go back to it.
With secondhand shopping, you need to patients, and there are loads.
I mean, I'm in the best city, one of the
best city in the world to buy secondhand stuff. There
are lots of op shops. I mean, I know there's
that Vignia's Red Cross and all that, but there are
(30:19):
loads of designer shops, secondhand shops that you can go
in and there's like huge bargains you can buy, like
a Prada bag or Gucci bag. There might be a
few seasons off, but who cares, right, So.
Speaker 2 (30:30):
You need to go to the posh suburbs and go
to the thrift shops in the posh suburbs.
Speaker 1 (30:34):
Yes, that's the true exactly. So I think it's I
think every woman need a good fun bag, whether it's
for work or for you know, going out. You need
a very cool whether it's a designer or just like
an och shape. We need a fun back because that
will elevate the whole outfit. And then you also need
(30:55):
op shop or second hand have the best jewelry because
they're quite retro and sometimes those you can't find anymore,
you know, And a lot of designers nowadays they just
regurg to take the same old design from the sixty
to seventy eighties. Anyway, So you can definitely decked out
your whole wardrobe with pre love clothes and it's like
at least half the price.
Speaker 2 (31:15):
Is there one thing in a woman's wardrobe the women
you work with that you think can make them look
in inverted commas?
Speaker 1 (31:20):
Old?
Speaker 3 (31:21):
Or should we retire that way of thinking?
Speaker 1 (31:23):
Floral dresses?
Speaker 3 (31:26):
Yeah, I'm not talking about cool floral.
Speaker 1 (31:28):
I mean there's loads of cool floral pattern but kind
of like Laura actually kind of floral. I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
we don't do that anymore. We're not in the eighties.
Speaker 3 (31:38):
We don't do that now.
Speaker 2 (31:40):
No. I know you like to throw things away when
they're not working anymore. But if our body's changing and
we've got some items that we just love, should we
be getting them tailored? I know a lot of fashion
people get things tailored altered.
Speaker 3 (31:54):
Is that what we should be doing?
Speaker 1 (31:55):
Per if you can find good tailor so I think
genes is quite difficult to alter too bigger or smaller.
I think because there's so many type of genes that
you can buy. I mean, say, a pair of jeans
will fit your thighs and your bump, but it won't
fit your waist. So it's very hard to kind of
(32:16):
alter that. So why don't you buy something that's that
low waisted, so it just said below the belly or
something right. Trialsers all a little bit easier to alter.
So I had a pair of a few pair of
old jeans that I didn't want to throw out. So
I asked my friend who's very good at sewing, to
sew it out for me, and so we're combined three
(32:36):
pair of geese. So I designed this in a certain
night way, so she just saw it up for me
and it looks great.
Speaker 3 (32:41):
So I think always.
Speaker 1 (32:42):
I mean, I don't really throw away stuff. I either
give it to friends, or I just exchange with other people,
or or I resell it in a pre up shop.
So it's important to recycle and just exchange clothes to
your friends with a girlfriends. How fun is that? And
make it make it a fun party.
Speaker 3 (33:00):
I'm sure.
Speaker 2 (33:01):
So every pair of pants I buy, I have to
get them taken up. It's it's just a tax on
being a short person.
Speaker 1 (33:07):
On the trial on the on the length right trousers.
But however, it is quite cool to have longer pens,
just so that it covers the trainers for a bit,
so it's a little bit longer just touching the ground.
So don't alter to show either.
Speaker 3 (33:23):
Don't cut them up above the shoe.
Speaker 1 (33:24):
No, no, no. And sometimes it's good to have extra
material at the bottom. So it does look a little
bit like you've borrow someone's trousers, but it's a cool look.
Speaker 3 (33:32):
Okay, I like that. Yeah, that's good.
Speaker 2 (33:35):
I've literally just bought a pair of red soup pants
online the other day because I've decided I need to
break out from my jeans and they.
Speaker 3 (33:42):
Are too long. But I'm like, oh, how much too
long are they?
Speaker 2 (33:46):
I'll put I'll put them on, and I'll send you
a picture with some non ugly shoes. Tell me, now,
I feel like you've done a lot of this in
this conversation already. But what's a big thing that fashion
people understand about dressing the ordinary? Mere models like us
do not. I kind of feel like maybe it's the
having fun part, right, fashion.
Speaker 1 (34:05):
People, I mean, no disrespect because you know, are you
to be the same fashion people believe in their own hype.
I think that's something very different from ordinary people. Like
fashion people, they have no qualm of dressing weird, going
all without mishmash, you know, and they are just not afraid.
Whereas normal people, you know, who's gone nine to five
(34:27):
job or that office job, they're a lot more conscious
about what they wear and what people think about them.
Whereas fashion people, they really don't give a fuck. So
I think that's that's the attitude that a lot of
people should take. And I mean even some of the
fashion people. You know, when I used to go to
fashion week, I see some people are like what the
hell are you wearing? But they own it? And that's
the trick. You have to own it, you know, and
(34:50):
they're almost like shameless.
Speaker 2 (34:53):
Do you have any tricks for helping yourself own it?
On one of those days when you look in the
mirror and you're feeling a bit crappy and a bit
mid LIFEI and you're I.
Speaker 3 (35:02):
Don't think I can pull this off today? Like are
we power posing?
Speaker 1 (35:06):
What are we doing? Have you seen tat Lasso? I have?
So you know, one aftels when Hannah bodingdam warding him.
She said that she, you know, boosts her self confidence
or up herself by breathing in loud, breathing in high
and tall. Everyone has a different mentor or a different
way of like, you know, upping themselves up.
Speaker 3 (35:28):
Right.
Speaker 1 (35:29):
I have many days when I wake up and I
feel like I look like shit or I don't feel
good because I didn't see the night before because of perimenopause.
I think I just take a moment and just have
some meat time and before I say any mean things
to my son or my husband because I'm in a
bad mood. I always trying to find me time for
a little bit to myself and just say, you know what,
(35:50):
today I'm going to set the day. It's going to
be a good day and just it's all about self
talking to yourself how you want your day to be.
Doesn't always work, but I think self self talk is
very important, especially during midlife.
Speaker 2 (36:05):
Okay, we're going to tread on the toes of the
Nothing to Wear podcasts, which is the moment podcast that
you would be aware of by talking about our budget
and bougie favorites. Now, I want to think about women
listening to this. We are about to be, and I
know in Australia it's very different because where you are.
But we're kind of going into winter right now. A
lot of fashion people I know love winter. They like
winter dressing way more than they like summer dressing. I
(36:28):
find it a bit scary because I'm not very good
at jackets and coats. But I want you to tell
me some great bougie so expensive and fancy buys and
some more budget friendly buys that you think would be
great for this season for our kind of age women.
Speaker 1 (36:43):
To be honest, I don't really like to wear fashion
or wear items by what's trendy this season, because most
of those trends are set for fashion people. Yes, they
somehow reach to themass when they go to shops like Zara,
Janam or The or the high street shops. I don't
like to tell my clients to follow the trend because
(37:05):
not all the trendsfits everyone. I always say, if you
like an item, see whether you have it already. So
I used when I was younger. I used to buy
the same kind of style all the time, but it's
just in different colors, true, you know so, and then
you end up having the same thing you know, sometimes
I wear something new, my friends are like, don't you
have that already? I'm like, oh God, I did that again,
(37:26):
you know, so try not to do that because that's
just a waste of money. So, whether it's a designer
bag you want, you know, I do actually feel that
once in a lifetime for every woman you should have
a very cool designer bag that you like. I'm not
promoting designer stuff because they're very expensive, but at the
(37:46):
same time, because they're so well made, it does kind
of elevate the whole outfit, even if you feel even
if you dress out very careful. So let's say, if
you if you dress like, you know, like a casual,
attractive bottom kind of look with a pair of heels,
you know, like a top with a denim jacket, if
(38:06):
you wear like a very sculptural bag doesn't even have
to be like from Chanel or anything, like a really sculptured, independent,
local designer bag, it just makes a whole up more
interesting and more edgy. I think at our age fifty
is above, we need to push ourselves to look more
edgy rather than dowdy. I think that's so important because
(38:28):
I sometimes I had a client who's recently was an
accountant and she wasn't very adventurous. So most of my
starting sessions I spent a lot of time convincing people
what I can.
Speaker 2 (38:44):
See, I bet you do you can wear this, and
they're going, I can't wear this, and you're like, just
wear this.
Speaker 1 (38:50):
And sometimes, you know, when I used to start people
in Hong Kong, I'm like, you're paying me a lot,
just fucking listen to me already. Okay, So you know,
so I think invest in a designer bag, even if
it's secondhand. You know, it will completely you elevate an
outfit or an interesting shaped bag that will make a
(39:14):
huge difference to your outfit. And invest in a good
coat because you know, like I'm in Melbourne, it apparently
gets quite cold here. Invest in a really good coat.
And just like small things like a nice scarf or
colorful scarf. So if you wear like a black jacket
or like a gray long coat, you know, wear it
(39:35):
was something a bit more fun with the colors, you know,
like I recently bought like a red scarf just because
you know, I don't even know where I'm old around
im in between. I just moved to Melbourne, so I'm
like in between boxes and stuff. Yeah, so stuff like that,
small things like scarf or gloves doesn't have to be
very boring color. Just go all out, start with the
small things with colorful stuff first and go from there.
Speaker 3 (39:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (39:57):
I like that advice about going for color with little
in a little bases, because not everyone in little doses.
Not everyone's as brave as me. I understand that, you know,
but at the same.
Speaker 1 (40:06):
Time, you need to explore. You don't know what you
missing until you try.
Speaker 2 (40:12):
Finish me off by telling me some style mattress for
grown up women that work.
Speaker 3 (40:15):
So you said that your three word style was I
think it was color, brave and fun. Fun.
Speaker 2 (40:21):
Yeah, what kind of things do you tell your your
clients they should think about?
Speaker 3 (40:26):
What are some good style mattress For those of us who.
Speaker 2 (40:28):
Feel like I like clothes, but I don't feel one
hundred percent confident about it. I just want to shift.
I want to elevate myself a bit. I want to
make myself a bit cooler. That's how I feel. What
should my mantra be?
Speaker 1 (40:40):
I think find your style icon. It doesn't have to
be a celebrity. It could be someone you know, or
it could be like someone who you really you really
enjoy looking at their style. It doesn't matter what age.
There are loads of really mature women that I follow
on Instagram. They are so cool and stylish and they're
all about for like sixty five or if something even
(41:02):
like seventy, And when I see them, I'm like, wow,
that's what I want to look like when I get older.
And even in my I've only been here two weeks.
So when I go on the street, I'm starting this
fashion series that I want to do off Street Star
in Melbourne. So I started going up to strangers and
the hey, you know, you look really cool. Can I
take a picture? Most people think it's fine, you know,
(41:22):
some people think I'm a freak. So I went up
to two older ladies who must be above seventy, and
they look so fabulous and they have one thing in common.
Is that also another tip for midlife lad women to
have one of them had really both of them have
really cool glasses and they're really thick rim And I
(41:44):
think it's really essential for midlife women to have really
cool glasses because if you wear something very normal, something
very casual, if you have like a really sick pair
of light glasses, they're like colorful or some kind of
fabulous funky design. It makes a huge difference. And then
you put on a red lipee, you're good to go.
(42:05):
So I think older women needs to be braver and
also experiment with colors. And I love my new mantra
for Mel Robbins. She teaches how to let them theory.
I don't know whether you hurt let them let me.
I actually make these braces. I don't know if you
can see. I make these brace of myself before I
left Perth. I bought these like beads from my set
(42:27):
like a kids shop, and it says let them let me,
because I want to remind myself when someone pisses me off,
or someone says something really mean or hurtful, or they
discredit me, I look at my risk and it reminds me,
you know what, let them be, what not not to
curse that word. Sorry, I just I was gonna say,
just now the sea one, let that be. Let them work,
(42:49):
but let me choose whether they get to sit at
my table. So this is something all women, especially perimenopausal
woman and mid life women should take on board. Let
them let me, and especially with that fashion and clothes
let them jush, but let me have fun.
Speaker 3 (43:08):
I have one last question before I let you go.
Should I be cutting my hair?
Speaker 1 (43:11):
Oh my, it's so weird that you asked me. That's
the first thing I wrote down when I make notes
today to tell you to cut your hair.
Speaker 2 (43:21):
But don't you think that I'm scared that then I
will look really middle aged if I cut my hair.
Speaker 1 (43:26):
How short you're going to cut it?
Speaker 2 (43:28):
I don't know, because like, I've always had lots of hair,
and I'm like, I don't know, maybe it's mental that
that feels useful to me to have hair.
Speaker 3 (43:36):
No, how short should I cut it?
Speaker 1 (43:38):
I think if you're not unsure, just do a bit
by bit. But I was thinking about your hair today
before we locked on that. I thought it's nice to
have wavy hair, but sometimes it could be a bit
too messy and it could be looked too mature. But
you know what you look good with death straight hair.
You should get loads of hair iron and straighten it
(44:01):
just to see how it looks. And I think it
will make a huge difference because that you can just
go back to, like, you know, wavy and stuff afterwards. Right,
just get like hair iron and irons like you know
kind of my kind of like texture, and I think
you look so much cooler. So then if you like
that straight hair look, then you cut it to like
a really straight lazy cup Bob fierce.
Speaker 2 (44:25):
Okay, let's see if I'm brave enough to follow Graces
and fun you can't do it.
Speaker 3 (44:31):
Thank you so much, Grace.
Speaker 2 (44:32):
You've been amazingly helpful as always, and I know there'll
be loads of tips there for all of our listeners.
Is there anything you want to leave them with or
do you feel like you've imparted your widow?
Speaker 1 (44:41):
Anyone who wants to get my starting tips you know
dm me on Greysome Style. I would love to help.
And then if you're in Melbourne, you know, get my
starting service. I can go shopping with you, and there's
so many choices in Melbourne is amazing.
Speaker 2 (44:54):
It would be so fun to go shopping with you.
I'm gonna put we'll put obviously all the links to
that in our show notes, because I think there'll be
some women who are like, oh my god, I need
Grace to tell you, shut up.
Speaker 3 (45:03):
I'm wearing exactly where try it.
Speaker 1 (45:07):
That means a boring bitch.
Speaker 2 (45:10):
Don't be such a boring bitch, that's our style mantra
for today friends, exactly what a that mantra?
Speaker 3 (45:22):
Well, I've been told.
Speaker 2 (45:23):
I hope this conversation about clothes was helpful and funny
and encouraged you like me to be a bit more
grace and just whar in her words, whatever the fuck
you like. If you love Grace and I do, go
listen to her epp about hormones and perry and menopause.
Speaker 3 (45:39):
It's fantastic.
Speaker 2 (45:40):
And if you want to find out more about her
stylist business, there's a link in the show notes. And
if you haven't listened to the conversation I had with
Lee Campbell about beauty treatments, tweakments, makeup and skincare, which
had a similar don't give a fuck energy, please scroll
back and do just that. A massive thanks to our
mid team. The executive producer is Nama Brown, the senior
(46:02):
producer is Grace Ruvray, the producer is Tarlie Blackman, and
we've also had audio production from Jacob And to you,
my mid friends, for being here for listening. Please tell
a friend about our show. If you love it, give
us a rating and a review. It means the world,
It really does. And I'll see you next week.
You're listening to a MoMA Mia podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:13):
Mamma Mere acknowledges the traditional owners of land and waters
that this podcast is recorded on. Skinny jeans are out,
but all maybe they're in again. Heels are too try hard,
but trainers, well, they have to be right. Ballet shoes
are back, but twiddle at ankles only.
Speaker 3 (00:31):
Please. Socks.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
You've got to wear socks, but those are too long,
and those are too short. That color isn't your season.
Those earrings are too big, No, sorry, too small? Big
colorful glasses. Let you wear black, but you don't want
to look like one of those women in big colorful glasses.
What's next a chunky necklace? I'm mid wardrobe confusion. I
(00:57):
want to look like me, but also not like me,
because me likes the same things I liked when I
was twenty one. I'm thirty one and forty one jeans
and frocks and everything blue and apparently dressing like you
with breaking fashion laws in several states and certainly in
the Big Book of fashion rules we all internalized as teens.
(01:20):
Don't show too much flesh, but don't be a nun.
Lengthen your legs, whittle your waist trick the eye into
what a twenty year delusion, perhaps where what I wear
makes me feel great and confident, capable and strong, sexy,
perhaps comfy, cool French not falling into a trap of comfy,
(01:43):
cozy midlife dressing that only adds to the whole invisible
woman effect that comes with.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
The last zero birthday.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
Find me a look please that makes me not double
take when I pass a shop window.
Speaker 3 (01:55):
Wait, that's me now?
Speaker 2 (01:58):
Is it too much to ask?
Speaker 3 (02:01):
Hello?
Speaker 2 (02:02):
I'm Holly Wainwright and I am mid midlife, mid family,
mid fashion crisis. Welcome to our new episode, which could
be called What to Wear when You're not a fetus?
Grown up clothes, grown up attitude, grown up advice. When
I decided it was time for a fashion overhaul, you know,
a grown up one, I knew exactly who to call
(02:22):
for a gentle roasting and some new bullshit advice. Grace Lamb.
You might remember Grace because she's our first ever repeat
guest on mid The fashion stylist who was a former
senior fashion editor at Vogue China for a decade, was
on Mid season two talking about hormones. Because as well
as being a style guru, she's an incredible advocate for
(02:44):
women going through perry and menopause, and if you heard
that episode, you know Grace is sweary, forthright and funny
as hell. Grace has recently moved from Perth to Melbourne
to continue her bespoke styling and shopping consultancy, and so
I thought it might be the perfect moment to call
her up for some no bullshit advice for me, for you,
(03:05):
for all of us about grown up style shopping and
spending and definitely definitely not dressing your age. Before we spoke,
I sent Grace a whole folder full of mirror selfies
I'd taken over a long period of time of me
wearing clothes, and as you'll hear, her feedback was real.
Enjoy this conversation with the exceptionally stylish Grace Lamb about clothes, fashion,
(03:28):
fun and not giving an f about what.
Speaker 3 (03:31):
You should wear.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
Grace Lamb, before we sat down for this conversation, now
and middle listeners know you from our wonderful conversation about
menopause last year. But after I spoke to you, I
was like, if there's one woman who's going to tell
it to me straight about clothes, style, fashion in this
point of my life.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
It's grace.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
I sent you a whole folder of pictures of me,
like just things I normally wear to work, a couple
of things i'd wear around the house. I think one
or two, like going out outfits. Be honest, critique my style.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
I mean to be honest. They weren't as bad as
I imagined. You told me.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
We don't know.
Speaker 3 (04:09):
Yah, it's a compliment or not.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
You told me to be brutal. I'm going to tell
it how it is. Some of the style, the mix
and match are really good, but I think you just
need to tweak it a little bit.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
Great because I think we'll, obviously said the listeners, No,
we'll put some of these pictures up on our socials
so we can see. But also a lot of our
lists probably have seen me on socials and stuff. There
are a few things I rely on all the time,
right jeans, wide legged jeans, silk shirts, things like that.
I think that they make me look grown up and
(04:40):
a little bit cool.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
Am I right? Am?
Speaker 2 (04:42):
I wrong?
Speaker 1 (04:42):
One hundred percent? But I think you can go even
wider on your jeans. So I used to be a
very skinny jeans girl, because I've got quite sim legs,
and I think last year, or at least the past
few months, I started wearing more baggy jeans and it
changed the whole game. And I implement it on my
(05:04):
well with all my clients in per because I just
moved from Perth to Melbourne and it's a game. So
I saw on your picture your jeans are are pretty white,
wider than like a skinny jeans, but it needs to
be even wider on the legs or even some of it.
You can. You can buy a few pair, like I
think jeans you can have different colors, different style for
(05:26):
different locations. So I have a pair because living in Perth,
there's not many choices to go shopping. So I was
looking for like a high wasted white jeans, like a
lighter blue color. Of all places, I found it in
Targets and it was very reasonable. People don't think, oh,
how can you stop with Target? You know you're like
used to work a vote. I'm like, so fucking what.
(05:47):
That doesn't mean that I can't shop at Target?
Speaker 3 (05:48):
You know?
Speaker 1 (05:49):
Does that mean I can't shop in secondhand clothes? I mean,
gonna be ridiculous. So I found this high waisted jeans
very seventy style quite wide for target kind of you know, demographic,
and it works really well because it just makes me
look thinner in the middle and makes my leg look longer.
And by the way, i'm if I've got five and
(06:10):
it makes me look even taller in photos for some reason.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
So you know, a lot of women are scared if
they were wearing skinny jeans in their say, twenties and
thirties and it made them feel good, and that they
get a bit scared.
Speaker 3 (06:23):
They're like, oh, but if I break.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Out of that, maybe I'm going to look really big
and dumpy, or maybe I'm going to look like I'm
trying to be cool. Do you think it's really crucial
to not kind of get wedded to these stories we
tell ourselves, like skinny jeans make me look skinny one
hundred percent.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
Don't give a fuck what other people think women, I mean,
how old are we We're we're in our forties, fifties
and even sixties above. Why do we care about what
other people think about what we wear? I mean, life's
too short. Just wear whatever fuck you want, That's what
I'm saying. I say to all my clients, well, and
they always say to me, oh, don't you think there's
a bit too young for me? Don't you think I
look like you know, I'm trying to be younger. I'm like,
(06:59):
why do you care what other people think? Honestly, don't
give a fuck what other people think. Just go with
your instinct if you feel good. And this is the
one sentence I teach all my clients who are like,
especially middle age. When they ask me, do you think
this is too young for me? I always say to
them no, because you need to wear what makes you
(07:19):
happy and fuck what everyone says, and you tell these
people you'll be wearing that next year. Bitch, I love it.
Speaker 3 (07:29):
So do you think back to my like denim silk shirts? Whatever?
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Do you think if you're not like super confident with fashion,
but you don't want to be boring, do you think
it's helpful for grown up.
Speaker 3 (07:39):
Women to like me?
Speaker 2 (07:40):
Then think about it like key pieces I'm gonna build around.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
Oh yeah, definitely. I always say wide leg jeans for
middle aged women because it makes you look more trendy,
and also it is so diverse. Don't think skinny jeans
is gonna be you look skinny. Sometimes I look at
women because this is what I do on the street.
When I see women, I always say to them, oh,
I wish I could tell her that to cut her shoulder,
and sometimes I do. I'll go up to the woman
go you look fabulous, but I think you look better
(08:05):
with shutter hair, and they go, oh my god.
Speaker 3 (08:07):
People. I was going to say, what the people say
when you do that grace.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
Sometimes they're shocked, and sometimes they find it really helpful
because that's all they know, whereas I don't know any
of these people. They're strangers. So when I walk on
the street, or if I sit on a tram or
the train, whatever and stuff, I imagine how I would style
these people. And if I feel like friendly that day,
or you know, if I had my charity, then I
(08:32):
feel great. Then I'll go up to people say hey,
you look great, but I think you look even better
if you cut your hair to a bob or if
you wear like white legged jeans, and people are like,
You'll naturally be like, who's this weirdo? But then once
we start a conversation, I mean, I'm very good at talking,
as you can tell, so they we just get into
this whole conversation and then I'll just give them a
field tips, and I'm like.
Speaker 2 (08:52):
Seeyah, oh, I would love that as long as no
one's telling me that I look terrible, but they're telling
me you look good, but you could look even better.
Speaker 3 (08:58):
That's such a good intro.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
But as we age, I mean, I used to be
such a bitch when I was. I'm not saying I'm
not anymore, but I still am. But I choose my
words carefully now. You know. It's all about compassion. So
no one likes to be tall. You're not like shit,
So it's how you say to people.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
Do you think it's helpful like, because sometimes when you're
getting a bit older, you feel a bit rocky in
your identity. We talked about that a bit with we're
talking about menopause last time. Do you think it's helpful
to have like a story to tell yourself about what.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
Style you want?
Speaker 1 (09:30):
You know?
Speaker 2 (09:30):
Like that we went We had this thing on out
loud a while ago where we were talking about the
three word theory and it was something like, chwose three
words that sum up your style? And I can't even
remember what mine were, but I think one of them
was easy.
Speaker 3 (09:43):
French.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
I think I picked up, which me thought was hilarious.
Because she was like, you're not French.
Speaker 1 (09:51):
One.
Speaker 2 (09:54):
I can't remember what the other relaxed or something, But like,
do you think it's useful to have like.
Speaker 3 (09:59):
A sort of style story for yourself?
Speaker 1 (10:02):
I wake up every morning depends on my mood obviously,
you know, because we're going through perimon pause. If I
had really good night's sleep, I feel a lot more
energized and a lot more brave and fun that morning.
I'm a very colorful person, so I like to dress
in all sorts of colors, even some of the colors
(10:24):
I don't normally wear, like a bright fusion pink or green.
So I try to force myself out of my own
comfort zone. So I would say fun colors and brave
every day. So that's kind of like my motto, and
I always tell my clients that you need to break
out of your comfort zone otherwise you don't even know
(10:46):
what kind of world is out there in terms of
like fashion and style. It's the same. It's like if
you eat fish and chips every day, like you know,
we both live in the UK. If you eat fish
and chips all your life, how do you know that
there's Chinese food, Japanese friends, you know, and it's just
a whole new world out there, and I think, sorry,
back to I tend to go of attention back to
your own question about the key pieces. I honestly feel
every woman needs to have a pair of a few
(11:08):
pair of like and style jeans, different colors black, like
denim black or white, even a pair of really stylish loafersts,
you know, because I mean I can't. I used to run.
I could used to be able to run in my
high heels to catch a bus or weather in London.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
Well that's because you worked at Vogue, mate, Yeah, you
could run in high heels.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
So I haven't worn high heels for ages since you know,
living in Perth is very rare I get to wear
my high heels. So nowadays it's also a trend to
wear more like flats or trainers or loafers. So really
invest into a really cool pair of loafers and you
can wear. And I'm a huge fan of like colorful socks.
Socks makes a huge difference to a look, So invest
in a lot of colorful socks, a lot of fun socks.
(11:50):
I buy all my socks from Japan. They're just so
much fun. And also, you know, I have loads of jewelry.
I stack myself with loads of jewery, and multi stacking
is the thing for me. So sometimes people, I saw
some of your pictures, you wore like two necklaces. It's great,
but I would even stack and just still over the
top because jewelry makes a huge it hance at Haunt.
Speaker 3 (12:12):
I know I'm not very good at accessories.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
I need to get better at accessories, which is every
single woman need to do. Can I, because you know
I'm going to be making notes, copious notes, as I'm
sure our listeners are. Can I push you on the
loafers a second? I feel like I'm allergic to black shoes.
I don't like black shoes. Generally speaking, what color are
my loafers to make the most versatile?
Speaker 1 (12:34):
Black is the most diverse in a way, because if
you wear why don't you like black shoes?
Speaker 3 (12:39):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
I always feel like I think I've always really because
you know, I said I'm not good at accessories, but
I really like shoes, and I often buy colorful shoes
or brown. But you think that am I missing a
classic trick on just not going for the If I'm
going to invest in some loafers, they should just be black.
Speaker 1 (12:55):
You can buy a few pets. I mean, I'm not
saying that every person needs to buy design yourself. Of
course they're better made and all that stuff, but there's
loads of high shipt brands that do really good shoes
as well, like loafers, which I've seen. And if you
don't like black, try brown first. I think the darker
color it is the easier to match with different things.
But then at the same time, you know, if you're
feeling adventuress, definitely go for red or white even and
(13:20):
loafers goes so well with like socks that I always
wear the Michael Jackson style black loafers with white socks,
sometimes like poker dot, like transparent socks, sometimes that completely
like solid white. It just gives you that kind of
like preppy school girl kind of back to school. I mean,
who wants to go back to school? No one. But
at the same time, game, it's just a fun touch
(13:42):
to an outfit.
Speaker 2 (13:45):
After this shortbreak, Grace gives it to me straight and
tells me what I've been wearing that needs to go
to the style graveyard.
Speaker 3 (13:51):
Back in a tick.
Speaker 2 (13:54):
So, having looked at myselfies and you've been generous. What
should I throw in the bin? What am I wearing
that does not work for me?
Speaker 1 (14:01):
I hate ugly shoes and I saw a few ugly
shoes that you have. I'm like, you know what, you
need to bin those motherfucking shoes.
Speaker 3 (14:07):
Man, like my floggy wooden cloggy ones.
Speaker 1 (14:12):
You have a pair of red shoes, which I love
the color, but it's just a style. It just looks too.
It reminds me of like, really like a strep shoe.
What's that called? That brand?
Speaker 2 (14:24):
Is like my red sandals, like the sort of cage
sandal ones.
Speaker 1 (14:28):
Oh yeah, those gotta go. Those gotta go.
Speaker 3 (14:30):
Oh yes, no no, oh I like those.
Speaker 1 (14:34):
No, if you want to keep them, then just wear
fun socks underneath. Please.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
Okay, yes, but that's fine.
Speaker 1 (14:40):
Computer says no, no, no.
Speaker 3 (14:42):
No, computer says no on the sandals. That's fair crops.
Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
Yeah, sorry, it reminds me of like, you know, crops,
but not in a good way. I'm just not a
fan of crocs. I mean, anyone older than age five
shoe were crops?
Speaker 3 (14:59):
Fair enough?
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Okay, So we're getting rid of them. We're getting rid
of the ugly shoes and going for some loafers. What
are the common mistakes? And I hate saying mistakes because
it's like getting dressed is a test, you know. But
as women get older, what are the common mistakes that
they make about their clothes? Do you think or the
women you see that they want to change.
Speaker 1 (15:18):
So my clients will come to me for advice and
we go, you know, I go to the home to
redo the wardrobe, edit their clothes, and then we go
shopping together. Most of them are so safe to the
point that they think that I'm like too outrageous. I'm like,
you ain't seen nothing yet. This is like my normal data.
I think women are too safe, Like we need to
(15:42):
branch out and explore. I mean, fashion is one of
the few things you can be adventurous and experimental. And
there's no right or wrong in fashion. There's only good
tastes and bad taste. It's important to explore, you know,
try different things, and it's all try an error, right,
So what if you wear something that you don't like
(16:02):
or you look shit in it, you just take it off.
It's so easy, but you need to try something new.
I say to my clients all the time. Every time
you dress, you think of me, what will grace them?
Do would grace them approve of this look? Or she
will go come on, you can do better than this, mate,
you know, So always push yourself every day and the
minute you go outside to the street the one person.
(16:25):
Not that we always seek for validation, but it's nice
to have someone compliment you. Oh, really like your look,
really like your shoes, really like your hair. It makes
you feel good, right, and then you practice that and
you do more and more each day.
Speaker 3 (16:38):
It's interesting.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
But what you said before about this is a space
where give yourself permission to have fun and experiment, because
I think that a little bit like food and other things,
we can be very emotional about clothes in terms of
I can't have fun with it because it's sort of
caught up in my self esteem, you know what I mean, Like, oh,
what if I look like I'm trying to be too young,
(17:00):
or it doesn't suit my body or whatever, and we
get very emotional about it. So you're kind of saying,
give yourself permission to just treat it like fun.
Speaker 1 (17:09):
And also, women get told. We get told since a
young age, oh you're too fat, you're too this, you know,
you're not good enough or weave and stuff. It's like,
fuck them, Who the fuck are you to tell me
what I should look like and not wear and where
it's none of your business? And as I said, you'll
be wearing that next year, bitch.
Speaker 3 (17:30):
All right. I want to touch on colors a little
bit because we were.
Speaker 2 (17:34):
Briefly obsessed with color theory in the Mama Mir office
last year and everyone got their colors done. And what
was funny is I've always been, as you can probably
tell from what I said to you I was wearing
and what I'm wearing right now, I love blue like
I love it right. But when I had my colors done,
the woman was like, actually, that blue isn't for you.
Speaker 3 (17:53):
You should be.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
Wearing paler colors or whatever. Do you think it's crucial
to understand what colors work for you or you shouldn't
restrict yourself and you should just go with what you like.
Speaker 1 (18:03):
Sometimes worth people with their skin color, like I don't
think I look good in yellow, but I will still
buy things yellow just because I want myself to get
used to the color. Then it's easier for me to
work on my color palette. So let's say, for example,
my red lips I'm wearing lipstick today, and I've been
wearing for like probably like twenty years or so. The
(18:26):
first time I put on this red lipey, I was like,
oh my god, I look like an Asian hole, you know,
Like it was just so it was so much, and
I was like, oh my god, if I stand on
a street corner, someone's gonna ask me how much. And
I was like, I shouldn't do that. But then as
the day goes past, I do it every day every day,
and now when I don't do a red lipey, I
(18:48):
kind of feel like I look ill. So it's all
bu pro perspective. And if you like the color, you're
going to make it work. It's the same thing. It's
like you're going to make You know, you're not going
to make a cake one time and then give up.
If you don't make it good, right, You're going to
keep trying and tweak it a bit, and then maybe
if let's say the blue that your your friends or
(19:08):
colleagues said that you don't it doesn't suit you, then
maybe okay, I'm going to try a necklace a blue
necklace instead, something small I can just take off, right,
just try. I always say to people try something small
and just graduate, you know, increase the volume, Increase the
amount on your body from a necklace to like a
complete T shirt and then to a whole dress. You know,
(19:29):
the color that you dislike or you're not used to.
It's all about getting used to style and fashion in colors.
Speaker 3 (19:36):
Do you think getting your colors done is a good thing? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (19:39):
Why not? I mean, as I said, do whatever makes
you happy. And also another very important point, especially in
mid live women, we need to own our looks and
we need to own it big because if you let's
say you're at home and you feel so good about
your outfit and you go out and you walk like
you know, everyone's like you're really sheepish. Now you're going
(20:01):
to go out and walk like like you're a million
dollars because your aura will come off and it will spread.
It's all about comfort. You need to be confident you
own your outfit.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
Having looked at the selfies, I said, you were there
any colors you think I should not be wearing?
Speaker 1 (20:16):
I mean there were so many girlfriends I kind of forgot.
Speaker 3 (20:21):
What I love.
Speaker 1 (20:22):
I love the outfit of was it like a pestel jacket?
Speaker 3 (20:27):
The pink?
Speaker 1 (20:28):
Yes, the pink coat with the was it purple trousers
or pink trousers?
Speaker 3 (20:33):
Yeah, yeah, like a magenta trouser.
Speaker 1 (20:35):
And then you put a black shirt underneath. Okay, that
look is good, but the black shirts too safe. You
should you should work tone on tone, like a very
similar tone but in different shades, or even like a
pink color that is the same family, the pestel colored family,
and then just tweet it. And then you wear like
do you have ear piers ye, or and then you
(20:55):
have like like a pestel bright color yellow ear rings
or like a necklace, loads of bracelets. It just it
just geled the whole whole thing together. Dial it all up, yes,
and then like a little fusion pink bag or something,
you know, just to top of it all, or like
a very colorful pair of trainers.
Speaker 3 (21:15):
You know.
Speaker 2 (21:15):
That's a good example of what I was talking about before,
because all my life, I don't really I'm not a
big fan of pastel pink. But I'm a blonde, and
I know people say it looks good, but I've never
liked it. But whenever I wear that coat, and I've
also got a pair of pink pants, whenever I wear
those everybody always says, oh, so maybe it's true, Like
I think I don't like pink, but maybe Pink likes
me exactly.
Speaker 1 (21:36):
Just try, just try it, and then you know you're
gonna feel good. People gonna compliment you. It makes you
feel even better.
Speaker 3 (21:41):
Now.
Speaker 2 (21:41):
The women who come to you and want your help,
what are they most What do they most commonly want
help with? Like what's going on with them and their
fashion and their clothes that they think, right, I really
need some help?
Speaker 3 (21:54):
Here are they?
Speaker 2 (21:54):
Is it because they're stuck? Is it because they feel
crappy about themselves?
Speaker 1 (21:58):
Like?
Speaker 3 (21:58):
What do they want your help with?
Speaker 1 (22:00):
So I get a lot of mid like women contacting
me about the wardrobe and style. Is because the waistline
have expended and we all have the men belly, so
nothing fits anymore, So they just have no idea how
to wear or what to wear. I think for work
it's a bit easier for them because they go down
this very very normal way of dressing for work. I
(22:23):
think it's the casual style that they all get stuck,
because I'm even sometimes for myself when I go casual,
I feel a little bit like to to casual, so
you don't feel silent, but there are ways of doing it.
I would also recommend in your go to list to
buy for essential items for the wardrobe. It's a pair
(22:44):
of really cool tracks of bottoms. I'm not talking about
Vicki polar style. I'm talking about, like, you know, a
big baggier. I have a pair of like Adidas Tracts
of bottom, which I love. Sometimes I actually wear high
heels and at the bottom of the trousers you can
unzip the top right up to your calf, so it
makes the legs look even bigger, like wider, so it's
(23:07):
not narrow. I think narrow makes you look a bit odd,
you know, proportion wise, especially for like my height.
Speaker 3 (23:13):
Five o five.
Speaker 1 (23:14):
So when I zip the side at the bottom of
my pants, it just makes me look cooler. And I
can wear like really funky trainers, funky socks. Sometimes I
wear high heels just to like you know, do like
a Vikie pool up glamorous style. So that's really good tips.
I think doesnitely invest into like a really cool TRECs
of bottoms wide legs.
Speaker 3 (23:35):
You're right that casual style is harder as you get older.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
I think it is.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
Because you just and it's interesting what you just said
about bodies, right, because, as I'm sure you probably see
from my pictures, but my weight goes up and down
a bit, and my wardrobe has to stretch and contract
to deal with that. What's your take on like wardrobe edit?
You know, should you keep those clothes that?
Speaker 3 (23:56):
You know?
Speaker 2 (23:56):
How some women have a I'm going to get back
into that part of their wardrobe or they have a
like they kind of can't decide.
Speaker 3 (24:03):
What's your take on that?
Speaker 2 (24:04):
Do you think we should throw out a lot of
clothes that make us feel less?
Speaker 3 (24:08):
Then?
Speaker 1 (24:08):
So I'm the worst per to us because I'm Maria
Kondor like crazy, I'm so.
Speaker 3 (24:13):
Brute you are you don't clutter?
Speaker 1 (24:14):
No, No, I'm not a holder like my home, we
don't hold, you know? Is that my pet peeve? So
I am very brutal when it comes to my wardrobe,
maybe sometimes too brutal. So when social media send me reminders,
I'm like, why the hell did I give that away?
Is so cool? You know? But anyway, it's only things.
Doesn't matter. I would say, if you have a favorite
(24:36):
piece of sentimental value, then keep it. But at the
same time, you need to be realistic. And I'm a
very realistic stylist. So I tell people, if you have
something for more than two years that you don't touch
or wear, that's got to go because otherwise it's just
gonna like clutter. And you know, we need good energy
even in your wardrobe. So you know what you have
(24:58):
the problem with people like my sister, my second sister,
she's a complete holder. She has shoes from like nineteen eighties,
and so you know, do you remember that brand Burlington
socks from you? Okay, yes, he has Burlington socks. Back
in the day when we're all in boarding school, I'm like,
are you kidding? Like, why would you keep like forty
year old socks? That's disgusting. Definitely don't hold because it's
(25:21):
not necessary. And I don't know, I'm a very brutal editor,
so I definitely don't like to keep things that I
don't wear because it's just pointless.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
Does it make getting dressed easier?
Speaker 1 (25:33):
Too?
Speaker 2 (25:34):
Like, do you think that you kind of need to
have a wardrobe of high rotation things and then things.
Speaker 3 (25:39):
That need to go?
Speaker 2 (25:40):
Like do you think that's a key to getting dressed
easily in the world?
Speaker 1 (25:43):
Now, I think what you need is time. If you
can spare like twenty minutes every night if you can
to work out what you're going to wear the next day.
You know, obviously check the weather report all of that
and stuff, because I think the problem with people is
when they're in the rush, they obviously don't have a
clear mind, and they put on whatever, and then they
look like shit, and then they feel shit, and then
the whole day shit.
Speaker 3 (26:04):
Yeah, so I think that sounds familiar.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
Just be very organized and trying to organize your outfit,
or even just do it on like a Sunday night
when the kids go to bed, say you know what,
I'm going to play my whole week outfit. You know,
just losey. So it's not like a mad rush in
the morning.
Speaker 2 (26:24):
Friends, when we come back, Grace is going to help
us decide what we need to add to our wardrobe
and an affordable accessible and because it's Grace Lamb, no bullshit, way,
don't go anywhere.
Speaker 3 (26:38):
We've talked about.
Speaker 2 (26:39):
This a little bit in terms of the wide leg
jeans and the good tracky pants and the loafers. But
if you're in a bit of a style run, obviously
you know times are tough. We can't all afford a
lot of new clothes. But what are the few things
that will refresh your wardrobe, as in, will help you
wear things you've already got, Like, what are the key
pieces that you should do that with.
Speaker 1 (26:59):
So I'm a huge fan of pre loved clothing. I
mean when I lived in London most of my life
and in Nottinghill Gate, so I go to Posabola every weekend.
And being Chinese, we aren't well. My mom's generation and
my grandmother they are not into second hand clothes. So
when I used to come back from London to Hong
Kong to visit them, I would deacktight in all my
like cool notting Hill outfit, you know, Like I remember
(27:22):
my twin sisters. No, my big sister's wedding, I wore
like a really gorgeous pre love dress from New York
and I said to my mom, oh my god, I
love this dress. Is pre love a secondhand She was like,
why would you? Why would you buy that? We're not poor.
You know you should have told me you need money.
Some people might die in it. You're wearing dead people's clothes.
Speaker 3 (27:43):
I'm like, oh my god, that kind.
Speaker 1 (27:44):
Of mentality is crazy, right, But nowadays even Chinese people
have changed, so we're more into like pre love secondhand
and also for the environment. You can buy your whole
wardrobe with secondhand shops in an op shop. So when
I was in Perth, I do like a monthly giveaway
with Red Cross. So I would go to an op
shop once a month and then provide like a free
(28:07):
service for an hour and a half two hours to
one lucky winner on my Instagram. So I do this
giveaway and it's amazing how you watch these women because
they have no idea how to like, I mean, it's
a lot. I mean, I'm a stylist and I've been
doing this for like over twenty five years, and it's
a lot for me to go into that shop because
it's just so much to take so much stuff. You
just don't even know where to start, right. But when
(28:29):
they come with me, they realize and you can see
their brain and start processing and just like going through
Oh oh really I can do that. Oh I would
have never picked that. And throughout the whole an hour
and a half two hours, I see the changes in
the way they think. It's the most beautiful thing ever,
just to watch women click in their own head of
breaking out of the comfort zone and going to another
(28:52):
dimension with fashion and dressing.
Speaker 2 (28:54):
And you think with secondhand shops, is that like do
you think it's good for basics? Do you think it's
good for dressy things? Like what's your when you go
into a new like through place that you've never been
in before, what do you make a b line for?
Like the men's jackets? Is it the jeans? Like what's
great knop shops?
Speaker 1 (29:13):
So I bought three massive shirt from a n op
shop a few months ago in Perth. They're like massive,
they're like ex men's size shirt and I just wear
like a dress and just things like that. You know,
you can tweak it a bit, you know, just because
it's in the men's section doesn't mean women can't wear it.
And I think when you go into these shops, first
(29:37):
thing you need to think of is not get overwhelmed,
because then you're going to create like a negative energy
and you're not going to find anything. And also, don't
bring your children, don't bring your husband or partner. Just
go by yourself and spend at least two hours because
it's so much to intake. Start with something that you need.
So let's say, if you need a dress, go to
(29:58):
the dress section and just go through it like bit
by bit. If it gets overwhelmed, go to another session,
look at something different, and then go back to it.
With secondhand shopping, you need to patients, and there are loads.
I mean, I'm in the best city, one of the
best city in the world to buy secondhand stuff. There
are lots of op shops. I mean, I know there's
that Vignia's Red Cross and all that, but there are
(30:19):
loads of designer shops, secondhand shops that you can go
in and there's like huge bargains you can buy, like
a Prada bag or Gucci bag. There might be a
few seasons off, but who cares, right, So.
Speaker 2 (30:30):
You need to go to the posh suburbs and go
to the thrift shops in the posh suburbs.
Speaker 1 (30:34):
Yes, that's the true exactly. So I think it's I
think every woman need a good fun bag, whether it's
for work or for you know, going out. You need
a very cool whether it's a designer or just like
an och shape. We need a fun back because that
will elevate the whole outfit. And then you also need
(30:55):
op shop or second hand have the best jewelry because
they're quite retro and sometimes those you can't find anymore,
you know, And a lot of designers nowadays they just
regurg to take the same old design from the sixty
to seventy eighties. Anyway, So you can definitely decked out
your whole wardrobe with pre love clothes and it's like
at least half the price.
Speaker 2 (31:15):
Is there one thing in a woman's wardrobe the women
you work with that you think can make them look
in inverted commas?
Speaker 1 (31:20):
Old?
Speaker 3 (31:21):
Or should we retire that way of thinking?
Speaker 1 (31:23):
Floral dresses?
Speaker 3 (31:26):
Yeah, I'm not talking about cool floral.
Speaker 1 (31:28):
I mean there's loads of cool floral pattern but kind
of like Laura actually kind of floral. I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
we don't do that anymore. We're not in the eighties.
Speaker 3 (31:38):
We don't do that now.
Speaker 2 (31:40):
No. I know you like to throw things away when
they're not working anymore. But if our body's changing and
we've got some items that we just love, should we
be getting them tailored? I know a lot of fashion
people get things tailored altered.
Speaker 3 (31:54):
Is that what we should be doing?
Speaker 1 (31:55):
Per if you can find good tailor so I think
genes is quite difficult to alter too bigger or smaller.
I think because there's so many type of genes that
you can buy. I mean, say, a pair of jeans
will fit your thighs and your bump, but it won't
fit your waist. So it's very hard to kind of
(32:16):
alter that. So why don't you buy something that's that
low waisted, so it just said below the belly or
something right. Trialsers all a little bit easier to alter.
So I had a pair of a few pair of
old jeans that I didn't want to throw out. So
I asked my friend who's very good at sewing, to
sew it out for me, and so we're combined three
(32:36):
pair of geese. So I designed this in a certain
night way, so she just saw it up for me
and it looks great.
Speaker 3 (32:41):
So I think always.
Speaker 1 (32:42):
I mean, I don't really throw away stuff. I either
give it to friends, or I just exchange with other people,
or or I resell it in a pre up shop.
So it's important to recycle and just exchange clothes to
your friends with a girlfriends. How fun is that? And
make it make it a fun party.
Speaker 3 (33:00):
I'm sure.
Speaker 2 (33:01):
So every pair of pants I buy, I have to
get them taken up. It's it's just a tax on
being a short person.
Speaker 1 (33:07):
On the trial on the on the length right trousers.
But however, it is quite cool to have longer pens,
just so that it covers the trainers for a bit,
so it's a little bit longer just touching the ground.
So don't alter to show either.
Speaker 3 (33:23):
Don't cut them up above the shoe.
Speaker 1 (33:24):
No, no, no. And sometimes it's good to have extra
material at the bottom. So it does look a little
bit like you've borrow someone's trousers, but it's a cool look.
Speaker 3 (33:32):
Okay, I like that. Yeah, that's good.
Speaker 2 (33:35):
I've literally just bought a pair of red soup pants
online the other day because I've decided I need to
break out from my jeans and they.
Speaker 3 (33:42):
Are too long. But I'm like, oh, how much too
long are they?
Speaker 2 (33:46):
I'll put I'll put them on, and I'll send you
a picture with some non ugly shoes. Tell me, now,
I feel like you've done a lot of this in
this conversation already. But what's a big thing that fashion
people understand about dressing the ordinary? Mere models like us
do not. I kind of feel like maybe it's the
having fun part, right, fashion.
Speaker 1 (34:05):
People, I mean, no disrespect because you know, are you
to be the same fashion people believe in their own hype.
I think that's something very different from ordinary people. Like
fashion people, they have no qualm of dressing weird, going
all without mishmash, you know, and they are just not afraid.
Whereas normal people, you know, who's gone nine to five
(34:27):
job or that office job, they're a lot more conscious
about what they wear and what people think about them.
Whereas fashion people, they really don't give a fuck. So
I think that's that's the attitude that a lot of
people should take. And I mean even some of the
fashion people. You know, when I used to go to
fashion week, I see some people are like what the
hell are you wearing? But they own it? And that's
the trick. You have to own it, you know, and
(34:50):
they're almost like shameless.
Speaker 2 (34:53):
Do you have any tricks for helping yourself own it?
On one of those days when you look in the
mirror and you're feeling a bit crappy and a bit
mid LIFEI and you're I.
Speaker 3 (35:02):
Don't think I can pull this off today? Like are
we power posing?
Speaker 1 (35:06):
What are we doing? Have you seen tat Lasso? I have?
So you know, one aftels when Hannah bodingdam warding him.
She said that she, you know, boosts her self confidence
or up herself by breathing in loud, breathing in high
and tall. Everyone has a different mentor or a different
way of like, you know, upping themselves up.
Speaker 3 (35:28):
Right.
Speaker 1 (35:29):
I have many days when I wake up and I
feel like I look like shit or I don't feel
good because I didn't see the night before because of perimenopause.
I think I just take a moment and just have
some meat time and before I say any mean things
to my son or my husband because I'm in a
bad mood. I always trying to find me time for
a little bit to myself and just say, you know what,
(35:50):
today I'm going to set the day. It's going to
be a good day and just it's all about self
talking to yourself how you want your day to be.
Doesn't always work, but I think self self talk is
very important, especially during midlife.
Speaker 2 (36:05):
Okay, we're going to tread on the toes of the
Nothing to Wear podcasts, which is the moment podcast that
you would be aware of by talking about our budget
and bougie favorites. Now, I want to think about women
listening to this. We are about to be, and I
know in Australia it's very different because where you are.
But we're kind of going into winter right now. A
lot of fashion people I know love winter. They like
winter dressing way more than they like summer dressing. I
(36:28):
find it a bit scary because I'm not very good
at jackets and coats. But I want you to tell
me some great bougie so expensive and fancy buys and
some more budget friendly buys that you think would be
great for this season for our kind of age women.
Speaker 1 (36:43):
To be honest, I don't really like to wear fashion
or wear items by what's trendy this season, because most
of those trends are set for fashion people. Yes, they
somehow reach to themass when they go to shops like Zara,
Janam or The or the high street shops. I don't
like to tell my clients to follow the trend because
(37:05):
not all the trendsfits everyone. I always say, if you
like an item, see whether you have it already. So
I used when I was younger. I used to buy
the same kind of style all the time, but it's
just in different colors, true, you know so, and then
you end up having the same thing you know, sometimes
I wear something new, my friends are like, don't you
have that already? I'm like, oh God, I did that again,
(37:26):
you know, so try not to do that because that's
just a waste of money. So, whether it's a designer
bag you want, you know, I do actually feel that
once in a lifetime for every woman you should have
a very cool designer bag that you like. I'm not
promoting designer stuff because they're very expensive, but at the
(37:46):
same time, because they're so well made, it does kind
of elevate the whole outfit, even if you feel even
if you dress out very careful. So let's say, if
you if you dress like, you know, like a casual,
attractive bottom kind of look with a pair of heels,
you know, like a top with a denim jacket, if
(38:06):
you wear like a very sculptural bag doesn't even have
to be like from Chanel or anything, like a really sculptured, independent,
local designer bag, it just makes a whole up more
interesting and more edgy. I think at our age fifty
is above, we need to push ourselves to look more
edgy rather than dowdy. I think that's so important because
(38:28):
I sometimes I had a client who's recently was an
accountant and she wasn't very adventurous. So most of my
starting sessions I spent a lot of time convincing people
what I can.
Speaker 2 (38:44):
See, I bet you do you can wear this, and
they're going, I can't wear this, and you're like, just
wear this.
Speaker 1 (38:50):
And sometimes, you know, when I used to start people
in Hong Kong, I'm like, you're paying me a lot,
just fucking listen to me already. Okay, So you know,
so I think invest in a designer bag, even if
it's secondhand. You know, it will completely you elevate an
outfit or an interesting shaped bag that will make a
(39:14):
huge difference to your outfit. And invest in a good
coat because you know, like I'm in Melbourne, it apparently
gets quite cold here. Invest in a really good coat.
And just like small things like a nice scarf or
colorful scarf. So if you wear like a black jacket
or like a gray long coat, you know, wear it
(39:35):
was something a bit more fun with the colors, you know,
like I recently bought like a red scarf just because
you know, I don't even know where I'm old around
im in between. I just moved to Melbourne, so I'm
like in between boxes and stuff. Yeah, so stuff like that,
small things like scarf or gloves doesn't have to be
very boring color. Just go all out, start with the
small things with colorful stuff first and go from there.
Speaker 3 (39:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (39:57):
I like that advice about going for color with little
in a little bases, because not everyone in little doses.
Not everyone's as brave as me. I understand that, you know,
but at the same.
Speaker 1 (40:06):
Time, you need to explore. You don't know what you
missing until you try.
Speaker 2 (40:12):
Finish me off by telling me some style mattress for
grown up women that work.
Speaker 3 (40:15):
So you said that your three word style was I
think it was color, brave and fun. Fun.
Speaker 2 (40:21):
Yeah, what kind of things do you tell your your
clients they should think about?
Speaker 3 (40:26):
What are some good style mattress For those of us who.
Speaker 2 (40:28):
Feel like I like clothes, but I don't feel one
hundred percent confident about it. I just want to shift.
I want to elevate myself a bit. I want to
make myself a bit cooler. That's how I feel. What
should my mantra be?
Speaker 1 (40:40):
I think find your style icon. It doesn't have to
be a celebrity. It could be someone you know, or
it could be like someone who you really you really
enjoy looking at their style. It doesn't matter what age.
There are loads of really mature women that I follow
on Instagram. They are so cool and stylish and they're
all about for like sixty five or if something even
(41:02):
like seventy, And when I see them, I'm like, wow,
that's what I want to look like when I get older.
And even in my I've only been here two weeks.
So when I go on the street, I'm starting this
fashion series that I want to do off Street Star
in Melbourne. So I started going up to strangers and
the hey, you know, you look really cool. Can I
take a picture? Most people think it's fine, you know,
(41:22):
some people think I'm a freak. So I went up
to two older ladies who must be above seventy, and
they look so fabulous and they have one thing in common.
Is that also another tip for midlife lad women to
have one of them had really both of them have
really cool glasses and they're really thick rim And I
(41:44):
think it's really essential for midlife women to have really
cool glasses because if you wear something very normal, something
very casual, if you have like a really sick pair
of light glasses, they're like colorful or some kind of
fabulous funky design. It makes a huge difference. And then
you put on a red lipee, you're good to go.
(42:05):
So I think older women needs to be braver and
also experiment with colors. And I love my new mantra
for Mel Robbins. She teaches how to let them theory.
I don't know whether you hurt let them let me.
I actually make these braces. I don't know if you
can see. I make these brace of myself before I
left Perth. I bought these like beads from my set
(42:27):
like a kids shop, and it says let them let me,
because I want to remind myself when someone pisses me off,
or someone says something really mean or hurtful, or they
discredit me, I look at my risk and it reminds me,
you know what, let them be, what not not to
curse that word. Sorry, I just I was gonna say,
just now the sea one, let that be. Let them work,
(42:49):
but let me choose whether they get to sit at
my table. So this is something all women, especially perimenopausal
woman and mid life women should take on board. Let
them let me, and especially with that fashion and clothes
let them jush, but let me have fun.
Speaker 3 (43:08):
I have one last question before I let you go.
Should I be cutting my hair?
Speaker 1 (43:11):
Oh my, it's so weird that you asked me. That's
the first thing I wrote down when I make notes
today to tell you to cut your hair.
Speaker 2 (43:21):
But don't you think that I'm scared that then I
will look really middle aged if I cut my hair.
Speaker 1 (43:26):
How short you're going to cut it?
Speaker 2 (43:28):
I don't know, because like, I've always had lots of hair,
and I'm like, I don't know, maybe it's mental that
that feels useful to me to have hair.
Speaker 3 (43:36):
No, how short should I cut it?
Speaker 1 (43:38):
I think if you're not unsure, just do a bit
by bit. But I was thinking about your hair today
before we locked on that. I thought it's nice to
have wavy hair, but sometimes it could be a bit
too messy and it could be looked too mature. But
you know what you look good with death straight hair.
You should get loads of hair iron and straighten it
(44:01):
just to see how it looks. And I think it
will make a huge difference because that you can just
go back to, like, you know, wavy and stuff afterwards. Right,
just get like hair iron and irons like you know
kind of my kind of like texture, and I think
you look so much cooler. So then if you like
that straight hair look, then you cut it to like
a really straight lazy cup Bob fierce.
Speaker 2 (44:25):
Okay, let's see if I'm brave enough to follow Graces
and fun you can't do it.
Speaker 3 (44:31):
Thank you so much, Grace.
Speaker 2 (44:32):
You've been amazingly helpful as always, and I know there'll
be loads of tips there for all of our listeners.
Is there anything you want to leave them with or
do you feel like you've imparted your widow?
Speaker 1 (44:41):
Anyone who wants to get my starting tips you know
dm me on Greysome Style. I would love to help.
And then if you're in Melbourne, you know, get my
starting service. I can go shopping with you, and there's
so many choices in Melbourne is amazing.
Speaker 2 (44:54):
It would be so fun to go shopping with you.
I'm gonna put we'll put obviously all the links to
that in our show notes, because I think there'll be
some women who are like, oh my god, I need
Grace to tell you, shut up.
Speaker 3 (45:03):
I'm wearing exactly where try it.
Speaker 1 (45:07):
That means a boring bitch.
Speaker 2 (45:10):
Don't be such a boring bitch, that's our style mantra
for today friends, exactly what a that mantra?
Speaker 3 (45:22):
Well, I've been told.
Speaker 2 (45:23):
I hope this conversation about clothes was helpful and funny
and encouraged you like me to be a bit more
grace and just whar in her words, whatever the fuck
you like. If you love Grace and I do, go
listen to her epp about hormones and perry and menopause.
Speaker 3 (45:39):
It's fantastic.
Speaker 2 (45:40):
And if you want to find out more about her
stylist business, there's a link in the show notes. And
if you haven't listened to the conversation I had with
Lee Campbell about beauty treatments, tweakments, makeup and skincare, which
had a similar don't give a fuck energy, please scroll
back and do just that. A massive thanks to our
mid team. The executive producer is Nama Brown, the senior
(46:02):
producer is Grace Ruvray, the producer is Tarlie Blackman, and
we've also had audio production from Jacob And to you,
my mid friends, for being here for listening. Please tell
a friend about our show. If you love it, give
us a rating and a review. It means the world,
It really does. And I'll see you next week.
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