Episode #14: A Very Bravoholic Birthday Breakdown! (The Valley SSN2 E8 +E9, Love Hotel, Summer House, Love Island Week 1+2))

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:06):
Hi, everybody.
My name is Lindsay, and I'm a bravo holic.
You're preaching to the choir.
Bravo, Bravo, bravo!
Honey, you have to stop saying that.
stupid enough to give it up.
Hey, Lindsay.
So Natalie tells me it's your birthday.
Happy birthday.

(00:27):
June 11th, I believe that's Gemini.
Geminis are amazing in it.
Which I'm sure you're amazing as well.
You started a podcast.
Listen, starting a podcast is super hard.
It takes so much work. So.
But even, like, getting it offthe ground, that's a huge accomplishment.
Which I think it's called Bravo Halex.

(00:50):
Anonymous.
Super cool.
Love the name. Super catchy.
But yeah,I hope it's getting off the ground.
I hope it's starting really well.
And also,I hope you have the best birthday.
She also tells me that, I'm one of your favorites from the Valley.
Thank you.
I appreciate it, or I was justthe cheapest on cameo, and she just didn't

(01:10):
want to say that about me, but,I'm just kidding.
But, yeah, I hope you have a greatbirthday and good luck on your podcast.
Hello, Lindsay.
Mia Sanchez here from the Valley.
And happy birthday. Oh my goodness.
It is your third.
37th birthday.
I hope you have the best day ever.

(01:31):
I hope you feel so loved and celebratednot only on your birthday,
but every single day.
So your sister Natalie told me that youhave your Bravo holic fan like you love.
Bravo! You have a Bravo Holic podcast.
So I feel so honored that I get tocelebrate and wish you happy birthday.
She also said to say,obviously we're saying happy birthday,

(01:55):
but share a favorite beauty tipand I feel like I have so many.
How do you choose?
How do I choose?
But I love Heelys hairstyles.
Obviously I didn't do that today,but I love a good heat list hairstyle
where you can just curl your hair,
sleeping it overnight and wake up and feelso put together in the morning.
And then moistureand sunblock are like my number one thing.

(02:17):
But at 37,
I'm sure you already know that I lovea really great moisturizing product.
And oh hey, we're saying happy birthday.
Happy birthday to you.
Happy happy birthday to you.
Yep Lindsay happy birthday.
You're awesome.
Happy birthday.
That was a surprise.
That's fun.

(02:37):
But yes, happy birthday from both of us.
Back to the beauty moisturizer.
Sunblock? It's everything.
But, yeah.
Daniel,I don't know if you know this about him.
He is a classically trained, like,vocalist.
Like, he went to schoolon a Fulbright scholarship for his vocal.
And so I love it when he singsHappy Birthday or sings just whatever.
So that was a very special little moment.

(02:58):
But happy birthday.
I hope you have the best 37th birthdayever.
We're so close in age.
I'm turning 36 coming up in my nextbirthday, but setting so much love to you.
And you're also born in June,
which my girls are born in June,and the little baby that's on the way.
Hopefully we'll be born in June as well,unless she comes early.
But sending you so muchlove. Happy happy birthday.

(03:32):
ho. That's right.
It's my birthday.
Welcome back. Addicts to Bravo.
Horlicks. Anonymous.
Your weekly support groupfor all things reality TV.
And if you're new here,this is a safe space where Bravo
and reality TV addicts and pop cultureobsessives come to break down the drama.
One meltdown at a time.

(03:54):
So to kick it off, those were some cameosthat listener of the pod Natalie
and my beloved sister,gave to me for my birthday.
And, I'm just so excitedto share them with you guys.
They're from two of the Valley Stars,so we've got Neha and Zak,
a show we've been covering, hereon the podcast all season,

(04:16):
and I thought they were perfectand I was so excited to get them.
And I thought it was so cute that Nehashared some of her favorite beauty tips.
And then Danny showed up and sangHappy Birthday, and she, like,
sincerely looked so excitedthat he got to sing
and then shared some informationthat we've never heard before.
Danny, I guess has a master's in vocals,so that's so cool.

(04:38):
Yeah.
So it was awesome and it was awesometo get Zack saying the podcast show name.
Maybe I'll work that into the intro ofthe show now, because that's really cool.
And he'sone of my favorite people on the show.
Both of them are so great gift.
Thank you so much, Natalie,for doing that.
It made my birthday extra special.

(04:59):
I want you to reach out.
I came in for
Adam.
I came It'sno surprise that Love Island has started.
Summer is hereand I love watching this show,
not only because it's on multiple timesa week, and it's something to look forward
to at the end of the day, every day,like literally 4 to 7 days a week.

(05:23):
But I also just love how messy it is
to have all these really hotmodels on there trying to date each other.
And of course, they're all exhibitingthe most toxic traits possible.
But I excuse it because they're hot.
And I was talking to my friendSimon today about that,
and I was literally saying how it's
I can't watch Love Is Blind on Netflix

(05:46):
because I feel like the people onthere are so average looking.
There's no excuse for their toxicity,
but there's plenty of excuses we can giveto these ultra hotties on Love Island.
Plus, you know, sorry I have a cold.
Plus, Ariana is the host of that showand she always serves
these banging looksso like I'm here for it.

(06:07):
Let's jump right into Love Island.
The initial cast is awesome.
I think we're already connectedto a lot of them now that we're into week
two. But my initial thoughts,the opening dance number
in the first episode was like the gayestopening ever.

(06:27):
Happy pride.
Because it was the gayest opening ever.
It was, I think it was an attempt
on like a mamma mia thing,but it felt more like pride.
Musical dance number, mixed with TikTok.
I don't know, it was weird,but I was here for it
because it felt of the seasonof Pride Month.

(06:48):
And they really want us to love BlackCordell, aka Taylor.
I'm not really here for it after I think
we're all at this pointnow where we're seeing this guy has like,
I don't know if he's asexualor if the environment's just not for him
or if he's just truly not into anybody,but he's not exploring anybody.
He is like coupled with Orlando.

(07:11):
But I don't think he actually is attractedto or interested in Orlando.
Yeah, it's really weird.
And I also thought in the,
in the intro like area thing,my sister made a great point.
There's Belle Dasha or Belle Bella,
but she spells at Belle with a hyphenand a, so we're going to call her Belle.

(07:33):
Dasha, like the rest of the internet, isBelle Dash is like dancing in a bikini
in front of shipping containers,
and my sister made a jokethat it's like giving sex trafficking,
because why is she dancing in, like,
an industrial zone, in a bikiniin front of shipping containers?
It's weird.
It's really weird.
And so I don't know whothe creative genius was.

(07:55):
The thought of thaton the Love Island show, but
it definitely is giving sex trafficking.
It's like, oh, we put all these models
in shipping containersand brought them here to Love Island.
It's weird.
So I didn't love the intro.
But excited about the cast.
I think everybody loves Chelsea.
Or as some of the castmembers are calling her, Shelly.

(08:16):
So now I really don't know.
We were introduced to her as Kelly,though.
Kelly.
But literally the guy she's coupled upwith, Austin calls her Shelly, so.
And she's a day trader and she is hot.
She is literally like, she reminds me of,the girl that played The Little Mermaid.
What was her name? Haley. Something

(08:38):
I literally want to call her Holly Berry,but that's not her name.
Anyway, she is so cute.
So likable.
She's going to be around for the longhaul.
She's definitely going to be, like,one of the core girls that we're standing.
Also, Andrea is, like, so cute.
She's elevated in escalator industry.
I don't know what that means, butshe's from Alabama and we love that too.
Then we have Hoda.

(09:00):
And, she's a fitness coach from North Carolina,
and she had a baby when she was 19,which we all know from her
weird ways that she broke the news toJeremiah and Nick calling herself a mummy.
And they're like a what of a dog?
It was just like,
so messy, and so unclear and like,not really adult.

(09:20):
Like not an adult way to say it.
But maybe she was nervous.
And I will give herthe benefit of the doubt.
Then another original girlwe have is, Belle.
Tasha.
She's a Hawaiianthat works in a family coffee shop.
She's 22 and she's super Christian,so she comes in, like, telling
people she's not going to kiss them.
And then we see the awesome, like,baseball challenge, which is
I think is like the second challengeor the first true challenge.

(09:43):
And she's already, upfor consideration of elimination.
And so she starts making outwith everybody and everyone's like, whoa.
And I was like,did she really think she was going to go
the whole show and like,not be kissing on people?
Because as she's seen the show before,it was weird.
But she warmed up to it.
And then she was, you know,having these like, I know it feel it's

(10:04):
like to be on this show,you have to be very pro orgy.
Because they're going around in circlesand, like, making out with everybody.
So you're swapping spit with everybody,so you got to be like, pro orgy.
I also think it's weird that, like,no one ever has monsters, like chewing
gum on the show.
I know that they have mikes going in theremonitoring like 24/7.
So gum might be annoying,but like for them

(10:26):
to all be making outwith each other all the time,
you just thinkthat they would have something like that.
You know?
I don't want to taste like Andrea's mouth.
Her tongue.
We all know how she baby bird kissesafter watching the show.
Like,I don't want to taste that, you know?
Then we have you, Lisa,and she's like, 410
and we already knowshe was kicked off the show.

(10:47):
But she was willing to suck your toe,and her dad is from Missouri,
and her mom is Cuban.
And I was just like, you know what?
Maybe Jesse should date her.
We all know that she's a Republican.
And honestly, wouldn't surprise meif Jesse was a Republican, too.
From Summer House.
If you're not knowingwho I'm talking about.
But he likes this toe being sucked.

(11:08):
And you, Lisa, literally says in her introthat she will suck toes.
So I was like, oh,maybe she could go be with Jesse. No.
Yeah.
Then we have Nick.
Nick is 24 and he's a nurse and his wholeintro is sexual, so good luck ladies.
He is definitely onethat's going to probably hop

(11:30):
around a little bit in my opinion.
And I think we've seen a little bit of italready
with some love trianglesand him not being able to side.
But I don't think that's goingto stop the whole season.
And I just think it's interestingthat like,
even when they cut togetherhis whole intro, his or his whole intro
of his character in the first episodeis sexual, I think that's really telling.
And another one that does that is ace.

(11:51):
So ace walks in and he already knows Kellyand he says he owns a dance company.
But have we all seen the videos of his,like,
dancing with Pakistani men on TikTok?
It's funny, it's good content.
But I'm wondering,does he even have a dance studio
or is this the dance studio?
Like he teachesforeign people in third world countries
how to danceand kind of makes fun of them?

(12:12):
And I don't know, it's I'mnot I'm not knocking it
because I watched a few videosand was like, oh, this is kind of funny.
But then it got tiring after a while
and then I was like,wait, is this really all he does?
Or is this promo for the dance studio?
Because I haven't heard anythingabout actual dancing.
So if you have, let me know,I don't know, comment on TikTok

(12:33):
or Instagram and tell me, like, doeshe actually have a dance studio?
Wouldn't surprise me if he didn'tbecause he's literally only 22.
So we have another.
All these guys so farare in their early 20s, which is not good
because these women have other thingsgoing down.
One's a mom, so we don't need more babies.

(12:54):
We don't need I don't understandwhy they're casting such young guys.
And then we have Taylorspeaking of young guys,
he looks like he hasn't grown into his,like, man body yet.
He's, like, super skinny, scrawny,even though he works on
a farm and is with horses or something.
And his whole intro was weirdbecause everyone was like
dancing in bikinis in the intro.

(13:14):
And then he was like, I don't know,twirling a rope around in front of a horse
pen, in a cowboyhat and like, pants or like, whatever.
Those western pants are galoshes, Idon't know, what do you call those things?
I don't know, but I thought
it was weird that everyone had to bein a bikini bathing suit except him.
He's a black rodeo boy.

(13:37):
He looks a little short,but he's not that short.
He's in vet school, and he said
if a girl can't take care of her feet,how is she going to deal with me?
So we have another foot guy.
And I thought that was a really weirdquote to have for your intro.
But he said it and they decided to use it.
So maybe that was the most exciting thing.

(13:59):
He said.
After two weeks with Taylor, I don't thinkhe says very many exciting things.
I'm not Tim Taylor at all.
Then we have Jeremiah,
and he stepped out of the limoand I was like, oh my God,
they are going to fight for this one.
He's got a great smile.
He's a model slash caterer.
He plays Fortnite, I don't know.
And then I said,oh my God, he's a cheater.

(14:21):
He shared that in his intro.
He literally saidhe's cheated before in his intro.
So I was like, okay, so so far just dogs.
Only dogs on the show.
Nick is cute though and I can see whythey're all fighting for him.
He's like a modern day.
What Gen Z does think is attractive.
He's like a tall, slender TimothyShalamar, but with a little bit more.
He's like, If Timothy Shalom was alifeguard, that's what Nicholas is giving.

(14:44):
And I think that's why so many bombshellsget into the house, are into Nick,
and why he's already found himselfin the love triangle.
I also think that watching Nickfor the first two weeks,
he actually has in-depth conversationswith people.
Like when Hoda wentand told Nick that she was a mom,
it took a moment to understandwhat the hell she was saying.

(15:07):
Like she thought he was a petmom and stuff a mommy.
I'm a mr..
This is really funny.
But then when he got it,
he actually asked her questionsabout her kid, which Jeremiah did it.
Hoda, Jeremiah's partner, didn't ask her
anything about her kid, so I was that.
So that was really tellingof where Jeremiah's I'm like,
I understand maybe he was thrown off

(15:28):
because she just sprung it on himso late in the game,
and I feel like it's somethingshe should have brought up
from the beginningto make sure people were chill with it.
But also, I thought he was likeway more interested in himself
and his position because he didn'teven ask, like, what's the kid's name?
Like, tell me about them. Like,what gender are they like?
He didn't ask youthat. Nick was asking those questions.
So I thought that was really interesting

(15:50):
that they showed bothbecause it made Jeremiah look really bad.
I also am of the stance at this point
talking about Jeremiah two weeksin, I think he's absolute trash.
Like it's not a surprise.
He's kind of a narcissist model guy, but
the fact that when she told him about herkids kid, he like had a withdrawal

(16:10):
and he has complete avoidant attachment,you can see it like he literally embodies
his inner child when he thinks he'sbeing shamed or deals with confrontation,
he like shuns away,
can't make eye contact, smiles through it,looks down at the floor,
literally shrugs his shoulders inward,and gets really uncomfortable
and like that's his traumathat he's not actually dealing with.

(16:31):
And so he's not, like, speaking upabout how he feels about things.
So, when Hoda is Harris has had a has
probably like anxious attachmentand avoidant attachment.
She is both but more anxious.
She'll be like leaning backwardsin like the sub dom like leather
and lace competition and being like,that's enough, stop kissing my guy.

(16:52):
And like,
making eyes and making faces at Jeremiahand trying to get Jeremiah's attention.
She'll be doing all that toxic stuffverbally.
Jeremiah is just like not saying it,
but he's still feeling the same wayand having the same conversations.
And when you watch Hoda and Jeremiahtalk about stuff like when they're having
a moment of conflictbecause they're definitely
the most progressed couple in the Houseat this point.

(17:13):
They've passed the honeymoon phaseand they're now in like their trauma
and feeling out what their trauma isand it's starting to conflict.
You can see that like one
is trying to talk to himand she's looking for
some kind of validationbecause she needs it from him,
and he doesn't give itbecause he has this avoidance stuff.
And then he, like, shies away from itand gets angry at her for, for and starts

(17:37):
and literally weaponizesthat she's a mom and says things like,
you're mothering me, stop being like a momand all this stuff.
It's really annoyingbecause he was the one
the first few days in that was claimingher, saying
they weren't kissing other peoplelike love, total love bombing.
So I think he's gross and I hate thateveryone's coming down on harder online
and not coming down on Jeremy,because I think they're both just as bad.

(18:00):
Yeah, I think they're both just as bad.
But he sure sees a cheater in his intro.
And I thought that was likenot a good look.
So oops. That's embarrassing. Jeremiah.
And then we have Austin.
He's 26 and from Michigan,but now he lives in Fort Lauderdale
and he's a pool boy and he looks like he'sstraight out of the 90s.
He does have some skin stuff like little

(18:21):
I don't knowif it's razor burn on his neck
all the time or some zits on his facebecause they're not eating.
I don't know what they're eating in there.
I know they can only make breakfastin the house.
And, catering bringsthe other meals out for them.
But I don't know what's going onwith Austin, but I honestly hated Austin.
To Starks, I heard he was another, like,Republican guy and just the like

(18:42):
the juxtapositionbetween how Austin treats Kelly
and how ace is treating Kelly.
I'm like more in Austin's favor,but I still don't think
they have that romantic chemistrythere, and I just don't.
I think he's being respectful,
but I think it's honestlylike killing the vibe a little bit.
So Kelly's like leaning towards a s'more,

(19:03):
even though ace is toxic as hell, likehe has his name tattooed on his own back
and he really didn't start tryingto pursue anyone until week two.
So it's like we're 7 or 8 episodes inand now he's trying.
It was just weird.
He also did that whole thing with Maya,which was really distasteful.
Amaya was a bombshell that came in,

(19:24):
and he paired with herinstead of pairing with Kelly.
And then, like immediate,Lee was trying to put it about like
he was calling it putting up boundaries,but he was just being rude.
She was trying to connectand be flirty with him,
and he was finding every waypossible to, like, shut her down.
I don't understand why he I honestly thinkace is trying to play the game
and he wanted to like draw outthis storyline of making the the viewers

(19:47):
want him and Kelly to get togetheror like to really make this
like arc the story arc for themso they can win the show.
And so he was trying to drag outgetting with Kelly as long as possible
so everyone could celebrate itwhen he does it or whatever.
But I also like I'm wondering if he's justlike toxic and wanted her to chase him.
I don't know, it was weirdand I don't like them.

(20:08):
I'm really hoping a killer bombshellcomes in for Kelly at some point.
We just saw, Pepé and that otherthe truck driver guy come in.
I forget his name.
Both of themseem like pretty good male bombshells.
At least they're like bigger dudesand they're a little bit older.
They're not like 22.
So hopefully that can be goodfor the group.
We had Iris come intoand she's really hot.

(20:30):
She's from here in LA from Santa Monica.
And while I do think like herand Nick on paper
would be the ideal match,
I think that Americajust did this big vote and they're like,
re coupling the bombshells with peopleand everyone on TikTok and Instagram.
If you're not on there was talking aboutlike who they're going to pair together

(20:51):
and they stuck Iris I think with aceI think that was the plan.
Let me check.
Let me just get a quickremember here, let me remind myself
okay.
So I pulled up the resultsof the recoupling poll from Reddit.
And this was like a thing that was beingpassed around on TikTok and everything.
So Iris, most people wanted to be

(21:13):
coupled with Jeremiah,which God, that's poor Iris.
I mean, I think that
Judah and Jeremiah are so toxic right now.
I think Jeremiah is looking for an outbecause he's avoidant.
He's like, oh,America doesn't want us to be together.
We shouldn't be together.
How does have a very hard time with that?
I don't thinkshe's going to blame Iris for it though.

(21:34):
But I think if it was another girlthat posed a threat that was like another,
like juicy little person of color,then maybe it'd be a problem.
Like if Jeremiah was repairedwith someone like Sierra,
then I think that would be like reallyjealous and having a hard time with it,
even though I don't think Sierra is thatinto Jeremiah, you know what I'm saying?

(21:54):
Jalen, the other new bombshell,
the truck driver guy, they have him being,paired up with Andrea,
which is great because I thinkthey actually have a good vibe.
I could see her being like a trucker'swife and, like, being home,
and he's on the road and he's coming homeand they're,
you know, live in this, like, countrylife, Americana lifestyle together.
I think that's kind of likethat works to me.

(22:17):
And then, Pepé is kind of a split, likemost people want him to be with Hannah.
But Sierra was a really close
second on this poll,so I guess we'll see the results tonight.
I, I'm recording this on Sundayon Father's Day,
and I was really waiting for this coldto go away, like the last couple days.
I just could not record it would.
But I would have sounded like a monster.

(22:39):
And, Yeah.
So I I'm excited to see where it goes.
I really
who other couples do we have to talk aboutthat are like worth talking about?
Nick and Sierraseem like a really cute couple,
and I could see them being togetherin real life.

(23:00):
I don't know if she would, like, reallycaptivate him in the real world very long
because he's like,got that tall, white little surfer boy
look that, like, everyonewould be throwing themselves at him.
But she's so smart and so funny.
Like, I really like her.
And if she sticks around a long time,she could move into, like, my
top three for the women with all Andreaand with Kelly.

(23:22):
But I guess we'll waitand see who our faves are.
Let me know who your favorites onLove Island are.
I know it's moving quickly.
I there's no way I could be podcastingand keeping up, but we will do
weekly check ins on where they'reat in the house or in the villa.
And, we'll talk about where it's at.
Arianna. What?
Maddox was, asked what couples she is
standing, and I loved her answer.

(23:45):
She is standing.
Kelly and Sierra.
I thought that was really hotbecause they're both by girls
and they're both really pretty.And they did.
They did kiss in the pie or like,I don't know, smooch or pie contest.
It was a horrible competitionname. Basically.
It was like, you get a pie to the faceor you kissed somebody.

(24:05):
They kissed and it was great.
And I think that that would actuallybe a really good couple.
I don't know if they'reI think they're both looking for men
just judging on how it goes.
But I,
and I think Sierra might be a little bitmore queer than Charlie is,
but like, is that even a thing?I don't think so.
But I, I'm, like, excited

(24:26):
at that because Ariana said it,so maybe like,
they'll put a little pressure on themand see if it works out.
I don't know,maybe it'll be a diamond after,
and then the other couplethat she was really into was Nick
and or Andrea,because Nick kissed all Andrea
in the first challengewhen they were all blindfolded
and like on the astroturf,and they were like, sneaking away
to kiss people that they weren'tand show me answers with.

(24:49):
So I thought that was really interesting.
There is a group of people online
that are like standing them,but let me know what you think.
And yeah, let's jump into the next show.
Let's talk about Summer House.
So on the

(25:09):
back of the reunion for Summer House,
Paige has not only launched,Gigli Squad book with Hannah,
and it's now a New York Times bestseller,but she's also launched her own
pajama line, which makes sense with herwhole, like, bed rotting brand.
And how she's always doing.
Her Amazon lives from a bed.

(25:29):
She's kind of, like,made that part of her brand.
So it makes sense that she'd come upwith, like, a pajama line
and off initial looks of the line.
The line itself is pretty simple.
It's supposed to be made with cottons.
So cottons nowadays are a little bitmore expensive than they used to be.
Since we're all getting oversaturatedwith poly blend fabrics,
which are plastics,plastic and oil based clothing.

(25:53):
It's a little tougher to get organiccottons and cotton clothing.
So Page's line is all cotton.
So I think that is really nice.
And I think there's
definitely a market for that, but I thinkit definitely increases the price. Plus
her limited supply
with increased demand of her,you know, her built in audience.
I think she can also increasethe price of her products.

(26:15):
So while the appear really simple,at least they're a cotton quality product.
And you know, you're buyinginto supporting Paige and her cat Daphne.
The line is called Daphneand that's her brand.
There was, though, the first weekof sales, which everything pretty much
sold out.
There was a lot of buzzabout potential for Daphne.

(26:37):
Paige, the circle is line lookingincredibly similar to another pajama line
that came out, and there is a TikTokerwhose viral video is going
viral right now, investigating itthat I want to share.
Her username is, CV, PJs.
And some people think she's reachingand some people think

(27:00):
that she's on to something.
And we will talk a little bit more aboutthe discourse after I play the video.
So here it is. excited at first.
I was making pajamasbecause that's a girl like me.
If you see her on Summer House, you just,you know, it's perfect for her.
And I design pajamas. I'm like,all right, great.
Great for the industry.
Let's normalize more pajamas.
Then I started to read the articleand I got a little sad.

(27:22):
Designed to be worn in and out of bed.
The girl in college,
the young professionallogging on to zoom for her first job.
That's my shtick.
That's how I advertise my brand.
Pajamas for zoom calls is my main thing.
It's what I use in articleson social media.
We're sending press kits out like inthis one page, says the girl in college,
the young professional logginginto zoom for her first job.

(27:43):
And that was my marketingfor when I was on Fox Philly.
Gift ideas for college grads,PJs that are zoom ready or timeline.
These were both like over a year agoand my brand's been out for two years now.
I don't want to assume that page herselfhas seen my brand.
Like I'm not famous.Like I've been on the news.
Like maybe she saw a billboardthat I keep reading the article,
and she goes on to talk abouthow she picked out the brand incubator

(28:05):
that she was going to useto make her brand.
And then it says Kyle Difford, a longtimefashion retail professional and former
GM of Jenna Lyons love scene,who is now the general manager of Daphne.
And I instantly was like, oh, literally.
A year ago today, Jenna Lyons
did a pop up shop doing a closetclean out in her office.

(28:25):
And with me, I brought my pajamas.
I didn't even think she'dlook at them again.
I just had to, for myself,put them in her orbit.
I gave her my pajamas.I gave her the lookbook.
I gave her the press kit.
I just gave her my bestbatch of my cute stuff.
I had a feelingI'd never see her in my pajamas,
but someone posteda picture of her at the sale
and I was like, all right,that's a win. That's my orange bag.
Back to the article.

(28:46):
So Kyle Difford worked for Jenna, and thennow he's the general manager of Daphne.
And then that was the missingpuzzle piece.
My pajamas were in the hands of love sceneJune 2024.
And then Kyle left and then went to meetDaphne in August 2024.
I'm not saying he stole my brand.
What I am saying isI hand delivered my press samples

(29:07):
and PR kit to her co-founder's box.
That's just the words and the conceptand the branding.
And the final piece wasI went on the Daphne Instagram
and I saw her merch,which has the same placement as my merch,
which isn't on my site, in my lookbookthat I hand delivered to her co-founder.
This isn't about the product similarities.
It's the same branding vibe.

(29:28):
It's the same ethos of my company.
So yeah, so she's
she's kind of going intohow they have identical branding
and even the custom like,I don't know, Monogramming
that's happening aroundthe collar has the exact same placement.
Paige kind of putting togethera collection of pieces.
Like, I'm sure she's looking at factoriesthat manufacture certain products

(29:52):
and she's pulling pieces togetherto a collection.
She's branding it and tagging itlike every other,
you know, big retail chain that does that.
That doesn't come upwith their own original designs.
So this is like a risk that you take.
And then you also risk,you know, it looking I don't know, it's
I feel so bad for this personif any of this is true, like the fact that

(30:14):
a lot of the brand verbiage
verbiage seems to be rippledand be the same is kind of wild.
But it's you know what?
It's getting Paigeeven more press for her brand.
Not that she needed itbecause it's all sold out.
Hopefully this helps this user and this,you know, this woman
who has her own pajama line, CV, PJs,

(30:36):
maybe it helps her get some press to.
But people on Reddit seem to say like
that page has been quoted sayingeverything from like, her making sure
the buttons were the perfect size, like,as if she's designed the looks,
all mattered to her and like,made a big deal for Daphne.
I don't know, it seems like this guy Kyleprobably stepped his foot in it.

(31:00):
But I also think that we'rejust not going to hear anything
about it in a week or two.
So, yeah, if you know anythingabout this, it's it's interesting.
But I mean, in music and fashion, it's so,so hard to just be like,
this is my thing.
Especially pajamas, because youand I know how basic pajamas are,
you either have like a button up shirtor it's a t shirt.
Either have the pantsor you have the shorts.

(31:21):
It's like,
I don't know, no one's reallycome out with anything groundbreaking
in pajamas in a long time, a nightgown,I don't know, that's a bathrobe.
Okay.
Like none of it's groundbreaking,so it's hard.
But also, I think it's importantthat I share my rankings.
We started the seasontalking about summer House.
It was a pretty boring season overall.

(31:43):
I think that the cast really didn'tbring it.
And that's why we had to listen to so muchdrama about Jesse and Lexi.
I'm so over it.
And I, like, would be happy ifJesse and Lexi weren't back next season.
Honestly, I want a whole new young cast.
I don't care what you guys sayat home. Page isn't coming back.

(32:03):
We've already heardall the announcements of them.
Who's not coming back? Lexi and rule.
None of them are coming back.
We need young blood, fresh partiers.
I want people that actually workduring the week
and want to let some steam offon the weekends in the house.
I think Kyle Cook can come back.
He can be like living down the streetin a house with like, Lindsay

(32:24):
and like Amanda, I don't know, likethe senior living center down the street.
And Kyle can come inand DJ a party here and there.
Or he could be, like the landlordof the summer house, and he could come
pop by for the parties and, like,get some drama.
But I think they're done.
They're just too old and boring.
Unless you're going to bring themsomewhere like Martha's Vineyard

(32:45):
and make it like the old boringsummer house where they're playing
pinnacle and drinking Aperol Spritz.
And listen, that sounds great to me,but that's why I'm not on the show.
We want to watch them party and fight andbe crazy and do what Summer House is so
after the
finale, hereis my ranking of the cast members, okay?

(33:07):
And number 11, I have Jesse.
Jesse is the worst.
He is the worst person in the housefor a number of reasons.
And namely, it'sbecause he's a giant doofus who cannot
stop smiling while he gaslights peopleand I think it's criminal
how everyone just chuckled awayat the reunion while he got away

(33:29):
scot free with doing what we didlast season, but ten times worse.
Literally.
Like saying he loved you on day 11 to Lexitelling her
they should move in together, telling herthey should adopt a cat together
like he was doing all the stuffduring the week to gas
her up and progresstheir relationship at an insane rate,
and then on the weekends was talking shitabout her to his friends.

(33:53):
I hate him, he can go. He's number 11.
Ten is Lexi.
I was actually really on Lexi sidefor a long time, until she started
this big podcast circuit where she justcould not stop talking about it.
I understand thatbecause she didn't form relationships
with the women on the show that summer,she then felt towards
the end of the season that she had to godo reconnaissance

(34:14):
and build up the drama to maybehave herself invited back the next season.
But I just don't think thatshe established enough of a friendship.
I think she was almost therewith Gabby and Lindsay.
Like if she just like ask the girlsabout themselves a little bit more,
she would be okay.
But I really think that Lexiis one of these girls
that gets in a relationshipand she doesn't have any other friends.

(34:34):
That's why her best friendsare her mom and her sister.
So she just loses all of her other friendsevery time she's in a relationship.
Maybe it's because she's a young modeland she travels a lot.
Maybe it's not.
But either way, I'm not about it.
And I hate girlsthat are like that. So Lexi, number ten,
number nine is coral.
Carl's boring.

(34:54):
Carl shouldn't have even been in the housethe summer.
Like he served no purpose.
Except that he is
Kyle's friend and was already on the showfor a number of seasons.
But he was boring like a piece of baloneyis more exciting than Carl.
So Carl numbernine. Number eight was West.
I think West was having a great summer,but he wasn't showing any of it on camera.
He was doing it all at the clubsand he was doing it all on the DL.

(35:17):
So, West wasn't giving us anything.
I think it got interesting in like oneepisode and then the reunion a little bit
when he was like talking to Jesse
about, like,I wasn't flirting with Lexi at the club.
Like, I thought that was a little bitinteresting.
I would have loved for himto actually jump down Jesse's throat,
but I literally think that West doesn'tsee Jesse as a threat at all.

(35:41):
And so doesn't even bother to check him.
And I think that Jesse's
ego's only getting bigger,especially because a couple weeks ago,
there were rumors in the press about Jesse
and Erika Jayne from The Real Housewivesof Beverly Hills hooking up,
and I would put my parents mortgage onJesse calling those in himself.
If you think that Jesse didn't immediatelyleave Erika's bed because, you know,

(36:06):
he had to travel to her,and then go sprinting in the streets
and screaming it on a megaphone
to everyone who would hear itthat he slept with Erika Jean or whatever.
Like that is absolutely him.
He has something to prove.
He's desperateto be seen in a certain light,
and he's going to keep trying to push it.
I think next season we're going to seeif West and Jesse come back.

(36:29):
It's going to be a lot of that.
I think we're gonna havesome butting heads in that friendship.
If Jesse starts putting his nosein more places, he shouldn't.
And I really hope someonelike fucking slaps him back a little bit.
Puts him in his placebecause he's annoying.
He's so annoying.
I thought the singing was annoying.
This.
This other stuff is annoying.
Like,everything about the dude is annoying
when he's like smiling and talking shit.

(36:49):
I didn't mean that. Zero. So annoying.
So by Jesse again later.
So that's West at number eight.
Number seven is M roll.
I actually loved M rolland I think he got a really hard at it.
I think he he was the best.
He came into the house.
He was getting the guys out of the houseand the girls out of the house
to go to the bars.
He was buying the table, okay,and he was bringing girls home.

(37:13):
M roll was embodyingthe early seasons of Summer House
and I was like, really grossed out.
And I wanted to take, like a spritzbottle of water to page when she was like,
I'm trying to, like,
have my boring storyline in bed over here,and you're having sex in the next room?
Yeah, that's what the show used to beabout hooking up and being crazy,

(37:33):
not sitting in bed, ushaving to watch you sit in bed
and contemplateif Craig is the right guy for you. Ick.
He's not. He's a loser. We always knew it.
I mean, a southern charm watchers.
Craig, there's no way.
I mean, Craig fooled us for a minute,but like, that's
just because we want to believethat people can be better.
And as women, we're constantly fallingvictim to that.

(37:54):
But at the end of the day, Craig'sstill a mess.
He'll always be a mess.
And I'm really hopingnow that the Warren Buffet girl dumped him
and, like, blocked him on Instagram,that he's going to be so messy on camera.
And guys, side noteif you didn't see that video of Shep
at that woman's house at late at night
where he's like, shitfacedand he's still talking about like what?

(38:16):
What happened on his season of the show?
It's dark.
I really do think that Shep does have
substance abuse issues,whether it's it's alcohol or it's more.
It was weird.
He was kind of out of his mindand the girl was like recording him
talking at the table.
And then clearly, like the other girland another girl and her, like,
boyfriend is sitting next to him.

(38:37):
It was just bizarro,and really dark, but like,
I kind of loved seeing it on TikTok,so maybe I'll share that.
I'll go find it and share it
on my page if you want to check it out.
LindseySaint Laura or filmmaker on TikTok. Oh.
So number six, I have Amanda.
Amanda came up with the bathing suit line.

(38:59):
Sure. There was a little bit of a flop.
First people to get their bathingsuits were saying
that the fitting was weird,but she was really responsive.
And I think they're workingon correcting it, and that's okay.
Fortunately, she has a solid fan basethat's going to work with her,
and I think the product is necessary.
There are tons of women out there

(39:20):
that need mix and match suitsthat have larger tops.
So hopefully she actually makes suitsfor women that need larger tops.
And we're not talking about
like a large C cup being the extra large,you know what I'm saying?
Because the women of America deservebetter.
And Amanda, you should give it to thembecause then you will be a millionaire.
Okay, so she's at number six.
I think that her and Kylehad the best season ever,

(39:43):
because they got to gossipso much about Lexi and Jesse.
I think Amanda is obsessed with Jessebecause he gives her a lot of the things
Kyle doesn't,namely public attention and flattery. But
I just think
that Amanda and Kyle have no relationship.
If there isn't something to gossip about,they definitely have their best days

(40:06):
in the house.
And I think now that Amanda is on
antidepressants and working on herself
and is feeling so positiveand more like herself,
I think she's going to notice that
more and more that her and Kyle reallydon't have a lot in common.
And, you know, it was sadwhen she said to the girls, hey,
can we find a way to stay in touchthroughout the year?

(40:27):
Because I really miss you when it's notthe summer and it's like, pages too busy.
Like Sierra is busy. Amanda.
They actually are running arounddoing stuff,
and maybe Amanda'sgoing to call for a course, correct?
Or maybe she's going to change herlife too.
Or maybe we're going to get the showthat we want
where we follow the girls in the city,and then they'll
have an excuse to be together becausethey're filming like, that would be great.

(40:49):
They'd be happy for Amanda,but she kind of made this bad,
and now she has to sit there.Pun intended.
In fifth place, I have Gabby,I love her, God,
I love Gabby, and she is the truefashionista of the show.
She has the best styleand I think it's a combination of things.
Why she doesn't get a better edit

(41:09):
and we don't get more screen timewith Gabby. One.
She comes from money,so I don't think she really cares.
I think she's really friendswith these people, and she doesn't care
if she's reallybeing like the main focus of the show.
But two, she's a Taurus and I just thinkthat she generally keeps to herself more
and she's not, like, interested instanding up in the limelight.
But three she's also a girls girland I love her.

(41:31):
So like our moments of seeing herare always supportive.
She's supportive to Lindsay,she's supportive to Lexi,
she's always being supporting cast,and it kind of sucks because we want her
to step to the main stage.
But I also don't think she's goingto get in petty little fights, like she's
going to snap when she feels it,and she's usually right when she does.
So I mean,

(41:53):
it's hard for there to
be like a longer residual burn with Gabby
or more fights going on with Gabbybecause she's kind of like brief.
And when she speaks, it's at like a momentwhere it's like thought out,
unintentional,or she's snapping at someone
to just shut up, like West, who's notreally going to carry on a fight with her.
He's going to grumble about it privatelyand then like, you know, move

(42:14):
on the next day because he's not lookingto harbor resentment.
So that's Gabby.
Sorry about my mic hold, you guys.
I feel bad. But, in fourthwe have Lindsay.
Lindsay was pregnant.She glowed this season.
She was supportive to Lexiand got some great scenes in.
She snapped at Karl a couple times.
She had a great season.
I was really happy for her

(42:35):
and I'm really happy that now she has thishealthy, beautiful little girl
and who cares about whoever the baby databetter baby daddy is.
And if it works out, like who cares?
Lindsay is the main focusand she killed it in third place.
I have Sierra, Sierra
needs to take a bit of a chill pill.

(42:58):
I, at the beginning of the season,was talking a lot
about how we're going to shoot on West
all season, and that, like, isn'tgoing to stop, but it really bothered me
that Sierra couldn't step outside herselfand see what was happening to
Lexi was like, parallelto what happened to her.
And I think there were momentswhere she did support Lexi.
But I think Sierra gets so hung upabout people talking in the press like,

(43:23):
I don't understandwhy she isn't used to it yet.
It's become something in the Bravo versethat's like very
normalpeople are stretching the seasons on
and building up for the next seasonby talking on podcasts or going on radio
shows and saying stuff, or TikTokor Instagram Stories
or something like, it's not unheard of.

(43:46):
And I get it.
She wantsshe doesn't want people doing it,
so she's putting her foot down and like,really punishing people who do it.
But of course, peoplewere going to ask Lexi about Sierra
because last year Sierra was the goldenbaby of the show, like everyone was team
Sierra against West.
So of coursethe press and everyone's going to be like
bringing Sierra into the mix.
Especially when Jesse literally laid it onso thick,

(44:08):
flopping on top of her in the pool,like snapping at her,
not to touch him and not to flirt with himlike I feel anything I.
If I was Sierra, I'd be angry at Jesseand not like hanging out with Jesse,
you know? Ick. So ick.
Sierra just needs guidance.
But I still love her.
And that'swhere she got the third place marker.

(44:29):
She did bring some dramathis season, and I loved seeing her,
but I just want her to grow.And I want her to be better.
And I want,
why can't she, like, be more friendlyto the girls coming into the house?
Same thing goes for Paige, too,but we'll get to her in second place.
I have KyleCook. Kyle Cook can really do no wrong.
He can bethe most toxic man on the planet.

(44:49):
Something about Kyle Cook and Summer Housego hand in hand.
Like he is the presidentof this fraternity.
And he can go nowhere.
Like if something goesreally wrong with Kyle.
I'm going to hate him, but, like,I still need him in the summer house.
Kyle ranks high.
He sends it every weekend.
No matter how old he gets.
He's going to get shitfaced, andhe's going to make sure it's a good time.

(45:12):
He's going to get in some fights,like he brings it every season 120%.
And that's why I love Kyle.
And, I'd be bummedif Summer House went on and Kyle
wasn't there, but I do think, like,he could be like the landlord
type guy that pops in, like,I don't think he needs to be in the house
with the young bloods. Like pushing it.
I think he could takea more glamorous title

(45:32):
and still keep the paycheckrolling in, you know what I mean?
And then first place, I have Paige.
Paige really is the star.
We all knew she wasn't going to come backafter the season.
She's outgrown the show entirely.
The types of drama that are on the showjust aren't for her anymore.
She's got bigger brandsbringing in way more bank.
Her podcast has reached likethe outer Space Go Out, Galaxy of Income.

(45:56):
She's a New York Times bestseller,and now she has a pajama line
that's sold out,and it's like just navy blue cotton sets.
Like you couldyeah, you could go buy it at target,
but it doesn't say Paige on the labelor Daphne on the label.
So I think it kicks ass.
I love Paige, I do wish she was morewarm and friendly, like,
I just, I think about Julia,you guys all the time.

(46:18):
Jules.
Just as for Jules,when she was on Summer House
and she just wanted to be Page's friend,and it's like Paige was into it.
And then all of a sudden, like,
someone said something to herand then she wasn't.
I just felt bad.
And I just wish these women would be morewelcoming to their female cast members,
especially because
Amanda
introduced Lexi as her friendat the beginning of the season.

(46:39):
And then I don't think Amanda
spent like one minute being Lexie's friendthe entire season.
It was weird.
She's like, and then we got my friendAmanda coming into the house, like,
just say you guys cast herfor the show at this point, because Amanda
barely showed any friendship towards her.
Hilarious.
But that's my rankings for Summer Houseat the end of the season.

(47:00):
It's definitely changedsince the beginning.
And I'm really excited for this summerto see where they're going.
Like, I can't wait.
I'm so tempted to just go to the Hamptonsfor a weekend and try to find people.
So if that's an interestingand I should do it, let me know.
Maybe I could find a way to be like,that's it, I'm going to the Hamptons.

(47:21):
So let's go.
Let's move on to the Valley.
We've got two episodesto talk about for the Valley.
Let's take a quick break,and then we're going to jump into it.

(47:42):
Okay, so we're jumping into the valley.
Episode eight.
This is the snake in the grass episode,
and it kicks off with Janet and Jasongetting their moment,
venting over Sheena'sdumb enchiladas at Brittany's house.
I really think that up until this pointthis season,
Lala and Sheena are playing

(48:05):
two different roles.
Sheena is playing, an amplifier slashice breaker for Janet and like,
I feel like Sheena is always inthese scenes with Jay and Brock
are always in these scenes with Janetand Jason to, like, really humanize them
and soften them and give them a momentto like tell their part of the story.
I think that's why Janet keepsbringing her on.

(48:26):
It's almost like a mutualunderstanding that they have.
Lala is somebody I honestly,I'm starting to think that Brittany
fucking needs in her life because
in some of these
interviews, Lalais the only one talking sense to Brittany.
She's the only one that's callingBrittany's attention to Jax.
Is things being controlling.

(48:47):
And if Lala wasn't there doing that,
I don't think Brittany would havetwo pennies to put together, like $0.02
to put together, to realize thatall the deep control that Jax has on her,
when it's like stalking her on the camerasor whatever, you know?
So I think I'm actuallystarting to be like, God,

(49:07):
Brittany needs Lala to be,like, tethered to her right now
to point out the toxic shit she's doing,because I think Randall did a lot of that
toxic shit to Lala, but she wasn't in itas many years as Brittany.
And I also think Lala's
a little sharper than Brittany,so she didn't fall for it and she sees it.
But Brittany doesn't see half of it.
Brittanyisn't like saying Jax is so controlling.

(49:29):
He did Z. She's like, oh, he's crazy.
He watches the cameras
and he even said to me,I know what you're even wearing today.
It's red shirt, black.
She's like, she doesn't understandwhat he's doing is like
is controlling her and telling herhe has control over her, suppressing her.

(49:49):
She doesn't get it.
And if Lala wasn't there,I don't know if anyone would tell her.
I think she'd still be.
I don't know this. It's a mess.
Brittany is a mess.
It's all a mess.
And it's very hard to judge and read.
And I just as a bystander,we see it and I get it.
If you were sucked into Jax Taylor'sworld 24 hours a day
for ten years,you'd probably be all fucked up too.

(50:11):
But like, it's confusing and it's hard.
And sometimes I get frustratedwith Brittany, and then other times
I feel bad for Brittany, and I'm just inthis weird place where she makes me angry.
But I'm sad for her too.
And I just don't know what to do with it,you know?
Except feel it when I feel it. So
something I was really excited about.
A bravo moment,
as you know,

(50:31):
we're going to go through and do Bravoand hell no moments
because that's our thing for the valleyright now.
Our bravo moment for this episode,
the first one that comes upis that we're getting a beach day.
And if you guys have watchedVanderpump Rules, you know
that if there's a beach day,we're going to get some shit.
Some shit's going down.
So there at Redondo Beach,there's these fire pits.

(50:53):
It's first come, first serve.
There is RV parking there.
So it's all these fire pitsthat are kind of close together
and people get hella competitivesometimes, especially in the summer
for the fire pits.
And it could be any walk of life therethat you're fighting with for a fire pit.
So some people go really earlyand hold it down all day like it's a mess.
It's not for me.

(51:13):
We have another thingwe do, and I'm not sharing it online
because I don't want y'all goingand doing it, but it's much better, okay?
It's much more luxurious.
Anyway,
we go to the beach and I'm like,oh, this is going to be good.
I thought it was going to be so gooduntil fucking Aaron gets out of the car
and his fugly hat, his weird like alpacawinter hat.

(51:34):
Oh my God, this guy just wants attentionso badly.
He's wearing this ugly, ugly hat.
No one else had a hat on.
It wasn't that cold, obviously.
So why does he have to wear that hat?
It's insane.
Unless he's still doing the cocaine thingwhere he's, like, coming down that day.
So he's wearing sunglasses and a hatbecause he's got the shivers or something.
I don't know, but I thoughtthe hat was weird and I hated it.

(51:56):
So kilo honeys.
Aaron, stupid hat, I roll.
I totally hear Jasmine's point
about how she didn't even bring up
the no ring thing to Janet and Jason.
As if it means she wasn't a part of, like,spreading the rumor or perpetuating it.
But like, I don't agree with it.

(52:19):
If youif I think she was spreading the rumor
and I think that it's not,you know, you're not a good friend.
If you're hearing a rumor like that
and you're not bringing it upto those people in the moment.
So Jasmine can like double down,triple down as much as she wants.
She can stomp her feetand throw a tantrum.

(52:39):
But I'm not on her side about that.
If she's like, she's supposed to beJason's friend of yours.
I don't like that.
She's belittling and talkinga certain way about Janet.
Like as she's walking away again.
Jasmine's like, non-confrontational.
The second she has to have a fight,
she goes or like,have a discussion with someone.
She's, like easily instigated.

(53:01):
She goes from 0 to 200 becauseshe can't hold her emotions at all.
And then she starts screaming.
And when people leave, that'swhen she really starts
digging down and saying horrible shit,just like fucking Zach.
But he's blackout wasted when he does it.
At least he has kind of an excuse.
Jasmine does it,and that's why it bothers me
that people aren't calling Jasmine outfor doing this shit.

(53:25):
Maybe it's a newer thing for her,but I know her
and Zach hang out, so it's probablylike a learned skill here.
But like, Zach reallydoes that stuff when he's shitfaced.
Blackout wasted.
Jasmine's doing it sober,and she's doing it like after
she has a discussionwith someone about something or a fight
with someone about something.It's exhausting.
I think it's stupid and childish, but

(53:47):
a rotten press?
I'm not.
I think she fails to take accountability.
And it's giving.
Like, honestly, it reminds mea little bit of Vinita and Southern charm.
Vinita is not,
like nearly as loud or crazy,but she is scared of confrontation too.
She just handles it an entirely differentway, like she just shuts down.

(54:07):
But it made me think of Vinitaa little bit and like
how she is scared of confrontation.
And I guess there's space on these showsfor people that handle
these things differently,just like there is in life.
But I don't know, I think it'skind of a buzzkill for the fight.
Like I'd rather have themlike do a little verbal spar, like
if you're going to go up with Jason,somebody who's an attorney,

(54:29):
you have to have some kind of emotionalcomposure so you can make a good rebuttal.
Like, I want to see someone go toeswith him and Janet that can, like,
stick it to them and not just screamand have a tantrum, but
I want to see himgo, I want to I want to be challenged.
If you're going to do it on the show,do it.

(54:49):
Anyway, the group plays Truth or Dare.
This is a hell no moment for me
because Sheena gets a moment on cameraor like three minutes.
Honestly, where Janet prompts herto talk about Brock's dick
and I'm like, God, you guys are justJanet.
Is Janet so smart?
She's so smart.

(55:10):
She. I know that we're all buying into the
who cares if she, like, befriendedSheena to get on a reality show?
She played a very long game,if that's the case.
But she's smart because she knowscoming on and helping her do these scenes
where she gets to talk aboutwhat's bothering her on camera,
and Sheena will spoon feed herand prompt her and set her up for it
so she can get that camera time overcasserole talking about Jasmine.

(55:35):
But then Janetpays it back in the same episode
by being like Sheena,tell us about Brock's dick.
Like, how big is it?
And then she knows, like it's not so muchabout length as it is about girth.
And then
talks about doing having anal with Brockand I'm like, God would be watching.
And then I thought of Thomas,friend of the pod, Thomas Norman,

(55:57):
and how much he probably loved hearing
about Sheena and Brock's anal.
You know what?
Let's ask him.
Hello?
Hey, Thomas, it's Lindsay. Hi.

(56:19):
How are you?
Brooke.
A massive,
Oh, no, you did.
I did all the French I know.
Okay, well, that's all right.
I'm calling them two second language.
It's barely.
I mean, I'mI want to take lessons and be better,
but I'll take I'll take itas my second language.
You know?
Yeah. It's like you're it'sprobably my third.

(56:41):
It's probably my third or fourth language.
My first language is English.
My second language is sarcasm.
My third language is reality TV.
And then maybe my fourthlanguage is French.
Okay. Boy.
And that's what I'm calling.
I'm calling because I want to talk to youabout the time that,
Janet gave Sheena the floorat the beach day

(57:03):
on the Valley recently,
and she asked, Sheena
about rocks deck, and I just want to knoweverything you thought about that seem.
Oh, yeah.
Are you talking about
when these 35 to 50 year oldsplay Truth or Dare on the beach?
That's right.
Yeah.

(57:23):
I mean, I mean, I was here for it.
I, I also kind of wonderedabout what Brock's
penis looked like because he'sa big Australian piece of meat.
So you're like,okay for him to get a green card here?
He's. He must have a big deck.
You know what?
You know, I just
you know what my algorithm has shown mea lot recently is rugby players
like caught like celebratingmade like whatever.

(57:46):
Goal. Touchdown. I don't know what it is.
But like, with their, like,taking balls spilling out of their shorts.
Yeah.
Because they were short shorts
and, like,apparently no underwear and they,
like, lift each other up by the shorts.
That can't be good for their scrotumhealth now,
like, it's very sloppy, floppy.
Yeah.
They're sperm counts are probably down.
The ligaments are strained.

(58:08):
Yes. But yeah, I mean,
I think I think he,I think he's doing well
and I think he appreciates it and so muchso that she got him
right when they did anal.
Yeah. How did you feel about, them,
being comfortabletalking about anal on the show?
You know, I'm here for itduring pride month.

(58:29):
During pride Monthespecially. It's beautiful.
I felt seen I felt heard,
I don't know, I, I said this to you
before that, like, I think poop is, like,the great equalizer.
I think it's I think it's very importantto talk about that.
One time I talked about my turd brownies.
Just because it's like we all do it.
Like,sometimes when I have crippling diarrhea,
the kind where you have to get nakedon the toilet, I'm like, you know what?

(58:53):
I bet Heidi Klum has this sometimes, too.
If the diary is crippling,how do you have time to get naked?
I'm usually justlike, kind of have a hot flash and say it
like when you're on the toilet,you have to like quickly.
It drove.
Oh, I've never had that. No.
Okay.
Well, I mean, I've been sick where I've just had
to, like, live in the bathroom and like,I pretty much am, like, so sick.

(59:15):
I'm just, like,sitting in there, but, like,
I've never had an experiencewhere I had to disrobe.
Okay, I guess I'm fortunate.
I guess I'm fortunate.
This reminds me of the time,but I was watching Burton
when he was a brand new puppyand I pooped at your house,
and I was like, hey,my pooped in the flesh.
Where's your plunger?
You know, like, I'm not a plunger.

(59:37):
Yeah, plungers are gross.
I mean, yeah, but,like, you can't just live like a plunger.
Less.
So I had to go home and get my plungerand take it home.
Literally,I that worked out perfect for me
because I didn't want a stinky,smelly plunger in my house.
Yeah.
So the only person,the only people that have ever had

(59:58):
problems and insistedI should have a plunger are men.
Yeah, that checks out.
What's the deal with that?
I don't know, I just think.
I think we're animals.
Really? I.
I said to someone the other day,I was like,
you think like when people saythat being gay is a choice, like,
you think I would choosebeing attracted to men.
They are the worst.

(01:00:19):
I don't even nobody would choose that.
You're right. Women are way better.
Like if you could be with a woman versusa man.
Women are more gentle.
They take care of everything.
They're so empathetic.
They're clean,you know, they're beautiful creatures.
I that's a great point.
If it was a choice,you would choose a woman.

(01:00:41):
I'm. I still am ready to to wed eitheryou or not.
Okay, I stand by that.
Okay. Well,
I think we're going to end upfighting over you at this point.
I. I thought about it and I was like,I would really like dual citizenship.
But then I was like, well,what am I bringing to the table?
Yeah. What are you bringing to the table?
I think you're like,I could do here for life.

(01:01:02):
That's really good. That's a great offer.
Is that a good okay?
If you co-host on the podcast a lotmore than then, I think we have a deal.
Also, it might be tri citizenship soon.
I'm going for my Scottish.
Wait. Really? Yeah.
How do you do that?
I have anthat like my grandma's from Scotland.
So she did all the paperworkbefore she passed away.

(01:01:23):
Oh, that was so freaking sweet of her.
That's right. Oh, my God,so you fit in perfect.
I can do better. I can do better.
Come try that again.
Oh, that's fucking great.
I'm so proud of her for doing that for me.
That's so sweet.
I have one more questionthan in this, lavender marriage interview.
How do you feel about uspicking a sperm donor that is, like,

(01:01:47):
tall, blond,British man or something like that?
Like, maybe better teeth.
Maybe we go Sweden, but, like,something, like, really athletic prowess.
And then we tell everyone that it isyour sperm.
That way doesn't inherit your abs.
But it like, has your features, but likethe best version of all of your features.

(01:02:07):
So that.
And we'll take it to our grave.
I love that I, I'm like 18% NorwegianI think like,
okay, mom's right from the voice and yeah,we don't like,
put the mental health card like the deckof cards given to them by genetics.
We don't want that. Right, right.
Let's do a little color when we goto Spain to freeze freezer eggs.
We'll also go to Norwayto get some sperm. Yes, I make it.

(01:02:29):
We'll make it happen.
We'll loop around, we'll drop it off.
We'll keep it together.
I think it's genius.
And we'll make sure that,
whoever donated it, like,what has girth to length ratio is.
And make sure we'll compare it to Brock's.Yeah. Perfect.
Okay, good. Oh, my God. Yes.
But it give us hemorrhoids.
You might, you might just have moved upto tie my friend Nick

(01:02:50):
for this lavendermarriage application process.
Hey, he still thinks he's going to bewith a guy, so.
I mean, maybe you're aheadof him now. I don't know.
Yeah,
he's got stiff competition at this point.
I can take care of myself.
Like finding love. So this.
This could be really good for us.
I would I would be honored.

(01:03:11):
Okay, well, then we can go.
We can go have bonfire beaches with truthor Dare with our friends. Yes.
And then thenthey could ask me about your girth.
Just say, well, when I hug his sperm.
That's right, his sperm.
I captured his sperm.
Okay, okay. It was dark.

(01:03:32):
It was dark.
But I felt
reasonably satisfied.
Yeah.
We are you gold star.
I forget I am, I,I am I'm not platinum because I did
come on my mother's vagina,but I that's ridiculous.
That's ridiculous.
That just tells me you don't have as manyallergies as other people.

(01:03:54):
Wait, what?
Yeah.
There's, like a statisticthat if you had a caesarean,
because you didn't have,like, your mother's vaginal fluids on you
and you were released into the world,
you're, like, more proneto allergies and stuff like that.
Whoa. Yeah.
I was actually a vacuum
on a birth after cesarean,which they don't really do a lot of.
Oh, my God, that's crazy.So they cut her open for that.

(01:04:16):
Then she still passed you through.
When she cut,they cut her open for my sister.
And then I was that for there.
Oh, I thought it was somethinglike they cut her open, put their hand
in, and just shoved it out.
I would have been better because I brokemy collarbone on the way out.
Oh, Jesus.
Yeah.
See, wecan't have that DNA in our children,

(01:04:37):
but we won't tell anybody.It'll be our secret.
And then we'll get, like,literally, Hercules
will literally get, like,a Viking gods DNA.
And then we're going to be like, yep,that's Thomas's baby.
And he's gonna be likethe Olympic swimmer.
Like Olympic everything.
Yeah.
Oh my God, oh my God.

(01:04:58):
Okay. At the Olympics in 2028, in LA.
Ew ew.
Oh my God.
What should I do? We got we should win.
Oh my God oh my god oh my God.
What if we both become matesat the Olympics
and we empty the trash binsand we steal the Olympians
dirty condoms and we use their semen.

(01:05:18):
We put them in a coolerbecause it has to be kept cold.
Right? That's a thing.
We'll put it in a really cold cooler and
then we sell their sperm
on the black sperm market.
Of course, we'll keep the best one.
Norwegian now.
Yeah. Whoever wins gold, and then we.
And then we sell the rest of it.
Like, based on how they ranklike gold, silver, bronze.

(01:05:41):
And there's like a,there's like a sliding scale.
That's right.
Yeah. I'm down for that or loser.
Just loser sperm.
But you know from this country.
Right.
And then, we'll give you a complimentary lapel pin.
Of the nation's flag with your sperm.
Oh my God.
And if we do it,if we do it, whoever won gold, we can say

(01:06:02):
he was literally the best swimmerwith the best swimmers.
Oh, that could be the billboard.
That's the that's the slogan.
That'sthat's our that's our website. Okay.
So if you can go ahead and
I'll look up, the best swimmers.com on GoDaddy.
Okay. We'll get started. Okay. Great.
We'll get this started right now.I'll let you go and do that.
I'll let you go do that okay? Okay.Thanks for weighing in.

(01:06:24):
Talk to you next week.
Of course. Toodles. Bye.
Okay.
Oh, wait wait wait wait wait wait wait.
Have you seen the New Traders cast?
Yeah, I did okay. What are your thoughts?
Okay, I some of them I love,
like Tiffany fromBig Brother is a really good choice.

(01:06:44):
And so is Ian from Big Brother.
Like, if they work together,they're going to be a really crazy team.
And I am excited to see TaraLipinski and her, like, costar.
What's his name?
Oh, Johnny Weir, Johnny Weir,they're both there,
so they're definitely going to worktogether.
So I don't know, they could be targetedpretty early.
I also think that they could
make one of them a traderbecause they're like a strong, strong duo.

(01:07:10):
But, I
honestly can say somethingthat's probably unpopular.
I don't. Okay. Yeah.
I just wish they picked a different dragqueen than Monet.
You're like,oh, no, I just feel like we just had
Monet last season.
Well, I think we had Bob. Exactly.
We had Bob, and now we have Bob 2.0.

(01:07:30):
And it's just kind of like, couldn'tthey find a different flavor?
I, I have a feelingthat Monet is going to get in drag
more than Bob did,which I'm excited to see.
That's good.
And I'm
sure Monet will play it better than Bobdid because Monet watched Bob do it.
But I just feel like
they're already bringing Dorinda back,which is great.

(01:07:52):
Like,I'm excited for her to get another shot.
Of course she did.
I feel like Dorinda, since she got kickedoff traders, was calling
Andy every single morning at like 4 a.m.
to bitch about it, and he was like,finally, like screamed and was like,
you want to read the fine,I'll just put you on the next season.
I'll call whoever I have to call atPeacock to get you on the next season.
Just stop calling me.
And so he did it.

(01:08:12):
Like, I feel like that literally happened,so I'm not surprised.
ARIN does back. I literally am not.
But I just I'm not crazyabout all the other people.
Like, why is Travis Kelsey's mom? They're
that is like, okay, what are
what are we doing there is, are she therefor someone to hurt her feelings?
Because that's what's going to happen,right?

(01:08:33):
Someone's gonna
hurt that old white woman's feelings,and then we're going to have to.
There's going to be literallya civil, civil unrest about it in America,
at least there's not a British royalthis time.
There has to be.
I don't think there is.
I think maybe she's the British royalthis time.
You know, I can't wait to see her.

(01:08:54):
I had a crush on when I was probably,what, like 8 or 9 years old.
Stephen from Laguna Beach.
Oh my God.
Wait, is Stephen on it? Yes.
Oh my God, we got.
So I was like, Stephen, that's so perfect.
That's so perfect because I am literallytalking to my friend Charlie
on the Meet My Friends podcast laterthis week about the Hills.

(01:09:15):
Like we're going to recaptalk a whole The Hills period.
So I'm excited. That steep.
Wow. Stephen's backStephen, that's so random.
We I haveto pull up the list because I want to see
who else is, like,who's the bachelor person?
I don't think there is one. Number one.
God, I hate him.

(01:09:37):
I know my heard.
He was like, I just came out.
So I know everything about being gay.
So this is my Netflix docu series.
Yeah. What the fuck is that?
But do you know,do you know what his, like, deal with?
The deal with, like, his ex?
He, like, stalked his ex?
Yeah.
Yeah,I heard it's like, super mixed because.

(01:09:58):
So there was a guy
that was on this podcastcalled Juicy Scoop with Heather McDonald,
and he, was part of the legal teamfor Colton against that woman.
And she I allegedly made
all of that stuff up,like the pregnancy stuff, everything.
I'm God, it was all her.

(01:10:20):
And she has a history of doing itwith other people.
I'm looking at the list right now.
So Michael Rapaport, he's such a lot.
Oh my God, wait.
Lisa RinnaI'm so excited that Lisa Rinna is on it.
She killed on The Apprentice.
Did you ever see her on The Apprentice?
I don't know, I think I might have,I think, yeah, she's slaughtered.

(01:10:40):
She's such a hustler.
She literally was so good on that show.
I was like, wow,
Eric Nam.
Okay, I'mgonna like seeing him on my television.
Who's that?
He's this really hot, singer,songwriter, TV person.
I think he's in Korea.
Wait, Porsha Williams from The Housewivesof Atlanta is on, and she's amazing.
I don't honestly, I don't know howthese people I never watch Housewives.

(01:11:02):
I don't know any of them.
Oh, this guy from Love Island, Rob,he's like the snake guy.
Oh, God. Rob is on it.
So is Maura Higgins, though,from Love Island.
She's a host. She's great.
I'm a good Christian from Top Chef.
I love Kristin, she's a gay
Ron. Ron Funches is pretty funny.

(01:11:23):
He might be a good counterweight,
honestly, to Monet exchange like thatbecause both of them are in there.
Maybe they won't be targeted as hardcoreas Bob was.
I cannot believe I'mlooking at a picture of Stephen Colletti.
He's still fine as hell.
I want to see.
I'm. I'm like literally scrolling.
Oh wait, KristenKish is really cute, right?

(01:11:45):
Yeah, she's really pretty.
I like her tattoo, too.
It's like a weird skeleton thing.
Look at Stephen.
He just looks like someone's fat dad.
No, he does not look fat. What?
Are you sure he looks I don't know.
Variety has a picture hereand he's in the stripe.
I know stripes aren't the most flatteringfor everybody.
Yeah, he doesn't look fat.
He's got, like, a total round tummy here.

(01:12:06):
It's cute though.
I mean, he's a One Tree Hill.
When was he on One Tree Hill?
I no idea what the fuck
creating and starring in everything.
Everyone is doing great.
I think I've heard of that show too. Wow.
Oh my God.
Caroline Stanbury is in it.
Who's that?

(01:12:26):
She was on Ladies of Londonand Real Housewives of Dubai.
She's. She's rich. Rich.
And she's like aa publicist, like, badass woman.
She's like, if Samantha Joneswas a real person, it's Caroline Stanbury.
Oh, okay.
Michael RapaportI actually am kind of here for.
He's going to be such a loud mouth.

(01:12:49):
I hatehim, but yeah, I, I know what you mean.
What do you hate about him?
I just, I don't like it's like,demeanor and voice
and, like, politics,and I just don't like him.
And the only thing I remember himfrom is, Friends,
when you played, the cop on friends that dated Phoebe.
Oh, I remember that.

(01:13:10):
Yeah, we.
Eric Nam I know him.
Yeah, right. What's he from?
Mark balance.
I love Mark Ballas.
What's Eric numb from?
What's he from?
I forget, oh.
He's a Korean. He's like a K-pop guy.
Thank you. Yeah.
I was like, yeah, he's from Korea.
Yeah. Or.

(01:13:33):
No, he's American, but he's he's American.
He's he was born in Georgia,but he's of Korean descent.
Or maybe he lived he grew up in Georgia.
He's my age.
He grew up in Georgia,but he's of Korean, Korean descent.
And yeah, K-pop, R&B and EDM vocals.

(01:13:53):
Oh, I gotta look into him.
Okay. Oh,we're gonna learn a lot about him.
Well, I don't know.
So I'm not, like, blown away, but, like,I trust the trader's
casting teamthat they've made magic before.
And they'll do it again.
Brian. So I'm not blown away.
There's like four.
I think there's like 4 or 5 peopleI probably would trade out, but

(01:14:14):
whatever.
It's not as goodas my casting was on a previous episode.
Right?
I, I'm, I'm wanting
I wish there were more peoplefrom like shows that I watch
like the talents, like I likewhen there was someone from the challenge
the past two seasons,I know that one person.
I'm kind of shocked
they didn't get someone like Josh
because Josh has been likedoing a lot of shows right now.
Oh yeah, like a bunch of shows.You're right.

(01:14:35):
He was just on the red balloonpopping show on Netflix.
Like the dating thing.
Oh my gosh.
He literally the first questionout of the gate.
He goes she goes ask a question.He's like, well, I'm pretty forward.
I just want to jump right into it.
So kissing is really important to me.
And the host laugh.
She's like, you're not asking to kissevery woman here.
And he's like, no, no.
Just like, how does that make you feel?

(01:14:56):
What's important to you?
It was like the weirdest.
Yeah,it was the weirdest lead in question ever.
Okay,I'm gonna have to watch pop the balloon.
It's so good.
I seen clips online, obviously,but not the,
They do a queer episode twothat I really liked.
Okay. Okay, great.
Yeah, I really so it's kind of mixed,but it's mostly hetero.

(01:15:19):
That's fine.
I'll allow it.
I think they should do,but I think they should do LoveIsland.
And I think everyone on LoveIsland should be bi and it should be like
that would be better.
Did you ever watch Are you the one?
Yeah, of course he wants the queer season.
Yes, of course that was the best season.
Was the best one. Yeah.
Maybe we need to do a deep dive episodewhere we talk about that season.

(01:15:41):
I. Yeah, cry for pride month.
Maybe we need to do it.
Either one.
Are you the two? Are you the three?
I don't know which one.
Probably one. I'm sorry. Oh yeah.
I like the color ball,you know, you never know.
You're right.
That was.
That wasn't discussed as an option before.
Yeah, it's it's a little too hard

(01:16:01):
for Americato get their head around right now.
Let's just focus on, like,let's just focus on acceptance
of the more basic formula first. Right.
And then maybe we could like the thingthe thing about all of that,
I don't know who gives a fuck who,just who gives a fuck who anyone fucks.
I'm over. I'm so over it.
It's not even a thing anymore.
We're done, we're over, we're done.

(01:16:24):
I'm exhausted.
Literally no one cares.
Yeah, literally no one cares.
But Love Island would be so good because.
Have you been watching Love Island?
No, but I think I'm gonna start.
You need to startbecause, well, watch literally
watch last season, watch season sixbecause you'll like it a lot more.
Shows lots of girl power.
But on Love Island recently,two of the girls in a challenge cast

(01:16:46):
because they're both by,this girl named Sierra
called out Kelly, who everyone lovesbecause she's so gorgeous.
She literally looks like, the LittleMermaid actress from the live action.
What's her name?
Yes, she is.
What's her name? Haley Bailey.
Haley Bailey.
I always want to call her Holly Berry.
Always.
Anyway, she's like,I've been waiting for this opportunity.

(01:17:09):
I'm calling out Kelly,and she calls out Kelly in the migo.
And I was like, oh my God,please just be together. Please.
There's so much better than the menyou're paired up with.
Like, you've no idea.
And it's happened before.
There's been girl girl girl relationshipson Love Island before, so it's not crazy.
It's not.
It's not unheard of.
But there's never been boy, boy.

(01:17:31):
There was,I remember when Demi Demi proposed to her
girlfriend on The Bachelor Bachelorette,I can't remember.
Wait.
Yeah, that was like this year, right?
I mean, I think it was a couple seasonsago, and she's like, that's right.
I'm by. This is my girlfriend.We're gonna get engaged.
And then she came back on Paradiseand was like a monster.
Yeah. Okay.
So queer people can be awful, too.

(01:17:52):
Yeah, exactly.
And she definitely single because she wasalso on the Pop the Balloon show.
Oh, God. Okay,you know what? I'm gonna go.
She's on that. She's on the.
She's on the queer episode of the Popthe Balloon show. So.
And I heard Johnny Bananas is on it, too.
He is, he is.
I know, metoo. I'd be like, Hi. Whatever you want.
Thank you.
Oh, really? Oh, you like him?
I love Johnny Bananas.

(01:18:12):
I think we'd be so compatible, actually.
Oh, yeah.
You and him with. Yeah. That's your.
That's your marriage, right?
I feel like we would bothmentally stimulate each other,
but we'd both be very fun,to both be very social,
but both get sick of each otherand like, the exact same pattern.
She just has the
biggest head I've ever seenon another human body.
Like, physically or emotionally.

(01:18:34):
Yeah, like really?
Oh my God, we.
I've never pay attention to that.
But I do like I do listen to podcastssometimes if he has good guests on
because he's just like he's really smart,
you know. Yeah, he is full of brains.
But yeah, you probably drive me crazy.
When he was he when he was like,
literally Lindsay from Summer Housewas doing like some fake publicity shit

(01:18:58):
and hanging out with himand having paparazzi take photos of her
right after she, after she broke upwith Karl on Summer House.
And he was, like, making the roundsand then was on traitors right after that.
So he was doing, like, a lot of work,if you know what I mean.
But they were, like, seen together,and I was like,
actually, don't stop the press shit.
You guys could actuallymaybe be a good partner ship.

(01:19:18):
Like, for realsies.
Yeah.
He wouldn't put up with Lindsay'sshit, though, so it would never work.
Wait, Lindsay, that person or Lindsay.
You know Lindsay from Summer House?
Well, another show you need to watch,I don't.
Okay, when the valley's over,maybe we have to have, like,
our listenersvote on what you need to watch.

(01:19:40):
Okay?
Okay.
Now, now, I'm really going to let you go,okay?
Okay, I'll talk to.
This one's called the balloon.
Go watch.Have the balloon, and we'll talk later.
Okay.
Bye bye.

(01:20:05):
Give it up. I'm.
Needed to be done.
To be done.
I do have to say, though,Jason is still a man after
my own heart because he is, like,getting ready on the beach.
He's a little nervous, too,
because he wants to talk to Jasmineabout all of this ring stuff,
and I really just wishthat he led into the conversation

(01:20:30):
with, hey, after the party,we were thinking more about it
and now we just like,can we talk about it really quick?
Like there's just some stuffI want to clear up about the ring thing.
Like he could just said that,but the way that they started it
first, Janet clearly doesn'twanna have the conversation.
She asked for like ten more minutesand she says,
why isn't Jasmine come up to us and do it?

(01:20:50):
And like, she's clearly dreading it,which is kind of human of her.
And honestly, like,I was kind of didn't expect to see that.
I thought Janet would, like, jumpat a scene.
She'd jump at any opportunityto be in a scene and be confrontational,
but I guess not.
And then Jason's so funny.
So you want ten minutes? Okay. No problem.
And then he's like, I think I'mjust going to pull Jasmine now.
And he just does it like he's it.

(01:21:10):
But it's so cute that she's like,please have ten more minutes.
He's like, yeah, okay.
I think it's so relatable and so cute.
Anyway, we know that the conversationdoesn't go well.
Jasmine calls him whippedafter they leave
and goes on about Janetsaying all sorts of things about her,
and I just don't understand how, like,

(01:21:31):
I just think Jason thoughtthey were different type of friend
than what Jasmineobviously thought they were.
I know that in the aftershow,they talk about how they haven't
really been that close of friendsfor a year or whatever,
but in Guy worldthat's a little different.
Like with Guy world,you're either good or you're not good.
And he probably thought they were good.
So it's not about frequencyas much, you know, whereas women

(01:21:52):
read into so many complex citiesin their friendships and relationships,
so it's no surprisethat they're on different pages.
And that really sucks.
And I think that's why I gave Jasminelike a hell no,
because I just thought,like, talking behind their back
and still saying all that shit was likeso immature and icky in
a Bravo moment in the episode,though, is that Nia, Zach, and Kristen

(01:22:14):
and Brittany all go to this bakery herein North Hollywood called La Rochelle.
It's a bakery and cafe. It's really cute.
Used to be a boba spot.
It's on Vineland,but there's a baker there.
Her name is Catherine and I'm a huge, hugefan of her baked goods, specifically
the almond croissant and her pistachiolike roulade or roll or whatever.

(01:22:35):
It's so good.
There's also a chocolate hazelnutone that's so good.
Anyways, she gets thereat the crack of dawn and bakes them.
I haven't met her yet,but every time I go in,
which is usually much later in the day,I'm like, Is Catherine here?
And then like,now she's here in the morning.
And so maybe one day I'll meet Catherine,but I haven't yet.
Either way,they didn't show the sign in the episode.
But that bakery is called La Rochelle.

(01:22:55):
It's on Vineland, and I think you shouldgo and support that business.
It's a small business.
I think that the owner is,like, on the spectrum,
and he's there all the time,and he remembers my name.
And I've been there, you know, like 4 or5 times spread out over a couple months.
So I think that's so impressiveand so sweet.
It's a cool local spot.
So go check out La Rochelle if you'rea friend of the show or a fan of the show,

(01:23:19):
and give them some business and honestly,you won't regret it.
The baked goods are so good.
There's a breakfast sandwich up my friendAlexandria.
If you listen to Meet My Friends podcastthat I also host,
I have a friend, Alexandria,that comes on that show sometimes,
and she loves to get the croissantbreakfast sandwich there, and it's like
a crescent roll.
That's cut in half.

(01:23:39):
And then they make a breakfast sandwichwith it.
It's so good. So yeah, good food there.
And I love that Nia also shouts outthat they went to a great outdoor place.
And it's actually on Magnolia.
It's called El Hollow.
And you see them playing cornholeand so it's like a Mexican spot.
Tex-Mex spot.
There's free chips and salsa at the backand they give you,

(01:24:01):
like, fishbowl margaritas.They've got TVs there.
It's a really good hangout spot.
Day drinking on weekends, whatever.
So if you're in North Hollywood
and you're looking to check outsome cool spots that were on the Valley,
I'm just goingto keep highlighting them as we go
because I think they, like,totally deserve it.
I think last episodethey also went to another place

(01:24:22):
we love called The Thirsty Merchant.
That's a really good spot.
That one's over on Riverside.
Near Cold Water,and it's got all sorts of outdoor games.
They've got TVs tuned.
It's kind of like a sporty vibe,but they have a frozen,
like a frozen rosé frozen margarita.That's really good.
They have a bunch of,like, tap poured frozen drinks,
but then they also have like lamadre mezcal.

(01:24:44):
So I usually get a mezcal margarita there.
And there'slike a lot of straight people.
So which is a funny joke, but it's real.
If you are in LA,you know, it's like everyone's queer.
Everyone's on the,on the rainbow spectrum.
And so if you're like a girl or a guyand you're looking to meet
more straights in the valley, the thirstymerchant is a good spot for that

(01:25:05):
because they're all there.
Yeah, especially on sports days.
But like, you could also go inif we like a Thursday night,
we like if they're a Tuesday or Thursdaynight, they're,
just drinks with the girls, you know?
Anyway, back to them at the bakery.
Zach talks to Brittanyand says the bravo moment for me.
Zach talks to Brittanyabout how she'll defend Jax and she'll

(01:25:26):
defend Gianna, and doesn't feel likeBrittany protects him the same way.
And Kristen actually backs him upand says she feels the same way too.
And I think I see it.
I'm not surewhere the Janet thing comes in.
If it's the way Janet talks to Brittany,or if it's like a Brittany
she if it's like a Brittany SheenaJanet connection,
or if it's because, like, Jason and Janethave been there so much for her and know

(01:25:49):
so much about the dark,dark points of her relationship
with Jax, because Jason's clearly comeand put her in a hotel.
And like, taken Jax to rehab.
I think that Janet and Jason knowa lot about Brittany,
and Jax is situation that they don'twant to share with the public.
The dark, dark shit.
And I think that's why Brittanyprobably protects Janet so much.

(01:26:09):
But at the same time,we this whole season have seen Zach
rallying behind Brittany and like,we'll see it in the next episode, too.
He's leading the command on as her righthand anywhere she's going
meeting about bar meetingabout like the Britt bar thing.
He was at that meeting like he's
going everywhere she's goingand he's being a true friend.

(01:26:30):
And so it hurts methat Brittany is not like respecting him
and loving himthe way that he wants to be loved,
because he's going aboveand beyond to love her.
So I was happy to see himstand up for himself
when it comes to that, and is happythat that group was there to do it,
because I think that was likea really good recipe
for him to speak his mindand her to maybe hear him.

(01:26:50):
I don't know if she agrees with it, but
I think she heard him.
It's kind of a chill environment.
And then I have another hellno moment for this episode before it ends.
And that's the scenewhere Jason calls Jax.
It's so annoying.
And I'm going to say it every episodethat Jax gets an appearance on it.
I'm annoyed, and I don't need to see Jaxdelivering some false narrative on camera

(01:27:13):
about how he's healing in his therapy,because we all know what happens.
Like the day he gets out of that placeand it's fucking crazy.
He's nuts. He can't. We see clips.
There's already clips playing on TikToklike the preview of next week's episode.
Jessie picks him up at his mental healthfacility, not rehab,
and takes him to his houseto pick up his stuff.

(01:27:33):
And I don't think it's the best ideabecause I think Jesse's just gonna, like,
antagonize the whole situation and pointout the garbage bag stuff or whatever.
And James and then Jax is like,I'm not going to take away the big stuff
from my son.
I'm not going to take away the whatevercouch in the whatever
for my son that needs it.
And then he goes on a tangentsaying how Brittany is just a woman

(01:27:54):
and she doesn't need such a big house,and she's to sell it right away.
So Jax isn't going to take the furniture,
but he is going to take the housefrom his son.
I just want everyone to like, hear thatand I know, we know he's crazy,
but we need to listento every single crazy thing he says
and identify it as crazybecause he's a monster.
And I hate Jax Taylor,and he's not a friend of this podcast.

(01:28:16):
And we are going to talkso much shit about him
whenever we want to,because everyone should be aware.
We can't be apologizing for this guy.
No one should be buying a $50 ticketto his Michigan podcast appearance.
I know he canceled a lot of his podcastappearance tour dates now,
and he should have,
but the fact that multiple womenwere in Michigan at that park

(01:28:37):
and they all paid $50 to listen to himtalk in a gazebo is mortifying.
The guy does not deserve any of that.
I can't imagine what kind of spithe was slew in, you know, just gross.
Jax is gross.
And so the fact that I knowthat Jason and people on the show
probably have a contractual obligationto do scenes with Jax,

(01:28:57):
but the producersshould have thought back on that.
And I'm going to say it every time.
He doesn't need to make an appearance
in every episode,even those contract says it.
He ruined thatby going to a mental health facility,
by checking out of the showbecause he had to go get help,
and he's still fucking up and textingand like, you know, harassing people.
And I don't thinkhe should get his appearance fee.

(01:29:19):
I don't think he should becut into the episode
because the episodes are great.Without Jax. We don't need him.
We literally do notneed him. On the next season.
Okay,
the aftershow for this episodeis pretty good.
Jax admits to digging throughBrittany's garbage multiple times.
I think that's worth highlighting.
I think it's worth highlightingthat Zach talks about growing up

(01:29:40):
and being obsessed with would be Goldberg,which I actually can really relate to.
Maybe not at his level,where he had posters and stuff of her,
but I honestly get it.
Sister act was a thing,like she was in every Muppet movie.
And I love the Muppets, so I, I,I love her too.
And I feel like I'm even closer to Zachnow that I know he loved what he.
Goldberg. I think it's hilarious.
He's also a member of a fishing lure club.

(01:30:04):
That's weird.
His parents are both in itand he's in it too.
He collects fishing lures and I thoughtthat was really just so interesting.
Like Zach Lore.
Everyone agrees that they don't thinkJason
is cheating about the ring thing,like everybody collectively.
So I thought that was worth noting.
And I also think it's worth
noting that Jax is talking abouthow his podcast makes $1 million a year.

(01:30:24):
Eyeroll. I wish that was me.
And maybe it soon will be,but that's crazy that he's getting ads
that get him $1 milliona year, that he's splitting with Brittany,
and he's in one shot saying she'sgoing to get all that money to pay off
what's owed to the house.
And then their shot is like,no, she's not.
So I don't know what the truth iswith all of that, but she

(01:30:45):
but she should just runamuck with his name and just talk.
Just tell us,Brittany, what's going on. You know,
so another thing.
Let's talk about the ring stuff.
There's some ring stuff they talk about.
Janet says she checks Jackson'seBay regularly
and hasn't seen Britney'sring up for sale yet.
And it made me think, wow,Janet is really like she could

(01:31:09):
she could be a good adversaryfor Kristen Doty
because Kristen Doty,we know, is like the FBI on the research.
And I think it's just really interestingthat Janet's keeping an eye on Jax
Taylor'seBay store to look for Britney's ring.
Jax says that he hasn't sold the ring yetand how he wants to give it back.
Get it back to Kyle Chan.

(01:31:31):
So he did take itof course, everyone knew he took it.
Jesse tellsJax that he spoke to a million lawyers,
and it's a gift in the state
of California, and Jax turns and goes,so I have to give it to her.
And then the editors cut it.They cut the scene.
I was like, what the fuck?
Like,what the fuck did Jesse say after that?
I want to know.

(01:31:51):
I think it'sI think they're protecting these men.
That cut is ridiculous.
They should have played that scene out.
I want to see what JacksonJesse said to each other
about the ringbeing a gift in the state of California
and Brittany, if you hear this,or if someone sends this to
Brittany, Brittany needs to knowthat that's her property.
She could be using that to pay offpart of the house.
Kyle Chant would help Brittany to,you know, just as much as he'd help

(01:32:13):
Jax, probably more so
couldn't
Kyle can melt it down,make it into something new for her.
At the very least.
You know.
Brittany says,
I'm just going to tell all thisI don't care.
And it was the same vibe as the podcastshe did with Kristen Doty
that I was talking about a few weeks ago,and I loved it.

(01:32:33):
But Brittany is clueless.
My God, she is so lucky.
Lala's there, sitting next to her,pointing out that Jax was controlling
of Brittany's money.
Brittany's like, well, we are reallyconservative with our with our money.
Jax is always telling meif we were spending too much on clothes
and Lala's like, no,he was doing that with your money
because you guys had separatea bank account.

(01:32:54):
He was doing that with your money.
And they're luckythey had separate bank accounts.
Because if he didn't, Jax probablywould have snorted all of Brittany's
money away to, like, the only reasonBrittany's been able to pay for the house
and take care of their son.
Crews during all of this time isbecause they had separate bank accounts,
and I'm actually so impressed thathe didn't get his hooks into her money.

(01:33:16):
I'm actually shockedthat they have separate bank accounts,
but I'm really happy about it because,
God, where would we be if she didn't?
It'd be horrible.
It'd be horrible.
I think, we
to save the midseason rankingsfor next time.

(01:33:36):
I have Thomas on the pod next week.
We're going to kick it off with announcing
wherewe're at in our rankings of the cast.
And, I think we should gointo the next episode.
So episode nine, when one door forecloses.
Dun dun dun, what a good title.
I mean.
What a mess.

(01:34:15):
jumping into episode nine,
Danny and Zachshare with the guys that they get screwed
talks instead of Botoxand talk about scrotum, Botox.
And I thought this was a fun, littlelighthearted moment between the guys.
And I like thatZach is integrating into the guys as well.
I think that Jesse's right.
He should have brought Jesseinstead of Danny to that appointment,

(01:34:38):
but I don't think that Zach and Jessegenerally get along in that way.
But I think Jesse would have been the guythat got it.
Yeah, it's not surprisethat Danny didn't get it.
I mean,
I could see him being a little uptight
or a little concerned or like, needingMia's permission for something like that.
This girl, Jenna, is at the party,
and Zach encourages her to gotell Jesse that she dated Aaron.

(01:35:01):
So she does.
And we see this girl again later,so I think she might be
a potential reoccurring characterthat they're trying out, but she goes
and tells,Jesse when she was dating Aaron.
And then Jesse's like,
building this timeline of when he thinksMichelle and Aaron were together
and that there was this momentwhere he heard that the guy she was seeing

(01:35:22):
was caught with another girl,and now he's like, was that Jenna?
Was that person? Jenna.
And so small world.
If it was really small world, but
I'm going to say it again, this is athis is a bravo moment.
And like,I can't believe I'm going to say this,
but I loved the scenewith Leila and Michelle.

(01:35:42):
And they're comparingwhen their daughters
spend time with their ex-husbands.
Lola goes, I know when she spends timewith Randall, because she will throw
whatever she wants in the cart and demandto go swimming and stuff like that.
And I was like,
oh my God, because you know that, like,Randall isn't like parenting properly.
He's just giving the girlswhatever they want, so they like him.

(01:36:04):
Same with Jesse.
Jesse's like, you want cheese?
I bought three different types of cheeseat the beginning of the last episode.
Like,I think it's nice to see that Michelle's
getting to bond with someonewhose husband is very similar.
I think Jesse and Randallare both really similar people,
and in just different ways,but like the same type of narcissist.

(01:36:26):
And I think it's nice that someone likeLala can bring that conversation
out of Michelle because she's not havingthese conversations with the other girls.
Like, I really don't think Michelle'sthat close a friend with these people,
and I'll get into it a little bitin another moment in this episode.
But, you know, it'sjust it's starting to show a little bit.
And I don't know if it's because she was

(01:36:46):
in this failing marriage for so longwith Jesse
struggling to raise her young kid,and now her mom has cancer.
But like,
it's there's a lot going onand I can just tell that the attention
hasn't gone into her friendships.
So, with that,we finally get to hear about
Michelle's mom having cancer,and it's devastating.
She shared a lot about thison The Viall Files.

(01:37:08):
So that episode that I talkedabout a couple weeks ago
that I listened toand I learned a lot more about Michelle.
And one of those things was that while sheher marriage was failing with Jesse
and he was like,you know, going out and partying
and according to her,had been doing coke and stuff like that.
She also was trying to take careof her mother, who had terminal cancer.

(01:37:29):
And so she's having a hard time with that.
She opens up about that.
And I thought it was really good
to learn more about Michelle and hearwhat she's going through,
so that maybe as an audiencewe can, like, rally around her, support
her, and kind of understandwhere she's coming from instead of, like,
hating on her so much.
A lot of people onlineare just hating on Michelle,
and I'm like, there's a lot more to her.
She's just not doing a good jobof opening up about it

(01:37:51):
or she's not getting the edit to do it.
So I think what she went on the podcast,
The Viall Files,it was a good move for sure.
So we're finally hearing about that
a hell
no moment that I have from this episodethat came up.
Is that
Michelle?
Okay,
I think it's really cute that everyone'srallying around Brittany,

(01:38:12):
and Michelle is like,why am I not getting this
kind of support from my friends?
And my hell, no moment is like, hell no.
Michelle,you aren't the people that are rallying
around Brittanyand throwing these parties and stuff.
Is Zach and Kristen.
You aren't close with Zach and Kristen.
You're not trying to build a relationshipwith Zach and Kristen.

(01:38:34):
So if they're two really good friendsand they're doing things to support
their friend,
you don't get entitled to those thingsjust because you're in the friend group.
You have to be a goodfriend to those people, to,
do you hear me?
So my hell, no moment is like, I feel badfor you, but I don't feel bad for you.
Like you have to do thingsfor other people too.
You don't just getyou don't just get support.

(01:38:55):
If you don't give support. Michelle.
So that's how I feel.
That's my held a little bit.
Zach's been leading the chargehelping Brittany.
Kristen has been leading the charge.
Janet shows up in his vocal,so she probably gets points for that
with Brittany and stuff.
And plus her and Jasonhave been helping behind the scenes
with like the really dark toxic stuff,the like real domestic abuse stuff.
And they've been really good friendsand I've just kind of like,

(01:39:19):
this is kind of on you, Michelle.
Like, if you want people to rally aroundyou, you have to rally around other people
and not just sulk in the cornerand be like, what about me?
We can get tension.
Does that bother me?
But do you want to, give a bravo moment?
A big bravocommending to our girl Brittany

(01:39:39):
because she meets with an attorneyand literally signs
the divorce papers in that momentand she doesn't hold back.
She shows those toxic,horrible text messages to the attorney,
and she's like,this is the stuff he's doing.
she's literally like, this is stalking.
And I'm happyshe said that because he is crazy, okay?

(01:40:00):
People need to tell Brittanyhow crazy he is
and give her words to usebecause she does not use them
and refer to it properly or understandthe severity of what's happening.
And I think she's just barely startingto understand it where she's at the show,
so I love that for her.
Bravo, Brittany. I'm so proud of you.

(01:40:20):
I'm also another Bravo momentin this episode.
They turned Jackson's bar into Brett'son the eve of him getting out of rehab.
I don't think the date.
I think, like the last hurrah ideamakes sense.
And, like, the date makes sense of it.
But I don't think changingJackson's name to Brett's
is because he's getting out the next day.
I think it'sjust because he's a piece of shit,
and she put lots of workinto that bar, too.

(01:40:42):
Like it?
It doesn't look great, you guys.
If you go to Jackson's bar,it's pretty dumpy.
It's like a backyard that they decorated.
It's picnic tablesthat haven't been properly stained.
It's like a succulent wall that's probablydead at this point, you know?
And it's like a circus tentwith some TVs in it.
It's all open air. There's cobwebs.
I watched Jax change and Brittany changecruises diaper on one of the bar tops.

(01:41:06):
Like so unhygienic.
It's just it's it's whatever.
It's not great.But Britney did her best with it.
She painted the walls and she did a lot.
And so it's cutethat they, like, made T-shirts
that said, Britt's like, I want oneof those. Those those look great.
And I thought it was like really cutethat they flipped it over.
And honestly, Jackshould be so mortified by his behavior.
He should have no reaction to this.

(01:41:27):
He should think it's cute that they'resupporting her and he should move on.
But we know he's not going to,
and we know Jesse's going to probably dumpgasoline on that fucking dumpster fire
and make it worse.So I expect that to happen.
But let's enjoy the moment nowand let's say bravo to the group, Kristen
and Zach and Nia who really threwthis thing together because it's so cute.
And I remember it making the news likeit was in the social media, like iced.

(01:41:51):
When it happened.
People were like, oh my God, they turnedJax into Brett's like, it was great.
So I'm excited to see that on TVand I'm excited to see them having
a good time and partying
and like, who cares what pisses them off?
Like,who honestly cares? Boo. Faculty who?
Jax. Taylor I love it.

(01:42:11):
They're all hanging out.
Okay.
Danny gets kind of surprisedthat Jason and Janet are already cool,
or Jason already cool with Jasmine,
and because he still feels likehe probably isn't.
Like Jasmine keeps bringing upshit to him, so he's probably expecting
Jasmineto hold on to shit with Janet and Jason
longer, which could be like a bindinga bonding thing for them.

(01:42:34):
And because like at this event, they'resaying that they're cool now or whatever.
He, like, double takes and asks forclarification and isn't really getting it.
And then the group jumps down his throatand is like, starts calling him Doug.
Dark side. Danny and a drunk.
And I mean,we don't see enough of the scene
to really understand
if that's the case, butI didn't think he looked like intoxicated.

(01:42:55):
I thought it looked like he was confusedthat they were already good.
And he had he wanted to know, like,how are you guys already?
Okay.
She was basically calling outyour marriage
and calling youand like saying there was infidelity.
Publicly on the show, like,how are you already good with that?
How are you already okay, what happened?
But, you know, they're trying to spinthis narrative that he's dark side.

(01:43:16):
Danny and Luke in a confessional.
Unfortunately, not in the real moment.
Like, I wish Luke did this in the moment.
In the confessional, Luke calls out Janetfor firing stray bullets, and he's right.
Why is Janet making comments like thiswhen Danny is being pulled away by Jesse?
She's like, there's dark Danny.
Like just shittalking behind his back again.

(01:43:37):
Like, I now don't feel so bad aboutJasmine shit talking Janet
while they're walking awaybecause she's doing the same shit.
Like sorry for literally ten minutes agoon this very podcast
saying that I felt bad
for Janet and Jasonbecause they were walking away
and Jasmine was still running her mouth

(01:43:59):
because literally Janet'sdoing the same thing right now.
So you deserve it, girl,
because you're you're spoonfeeding it to other people to,
and that made me annoyedthat she's like talking shit
while he's being walked away.
And I didn't even think he looked likehe was wasted.
I mean, maybe he was,
but there was nothing that happenedin that conversation in that, like,

(01:44:21):
made it warrantedfor them to jump down his throat.
Did we miss something?
Is there like a scene that we didn't see?
I don't get it.
And the fact
that Janet's still talking about himgroping somebody like from a year ago
from like, last Halloween,I just like, oh, it's so frustrating.
She's so patronizing.

(01:44:41):
How frustrating is that?
You make a mistake like thatand that just she'll know
she's not going to let it go.
It's going to be somethingshe holds on to all fucking season.
And I feel so bad for themhaving to still deal with this.
I know he fucked upand Jasmine can keep bringing it up
and she can hold it against himand she can never be his friend.
Whatever I get it,but I just can't believe

(01:45:02):
that like someone like Janetis still perpetuating it too.
It's annoying.
I'd be like they'd run across the tableand strangle her.
Kind of like Homer Simpson, you know?
I think that Jesse makes
a good point, that changingthe name of the bar will provoke Jax.
But, like, what doesn't provoke Jax?
So it's good TV,

(01:45:24):
and Jax can suck everyone'scollective dick.
Maybe it's not a good ideathat Jesse's picking up Jax.
At the rehab,
which is really a mental health
facility and could,I think that he's going to light
a match, to his canister of gas,and it's probably going to be really bad.

(01:45:45):
So I'm hoping that Brittany is notat the house when they go to the house.
I'm hoping that, no,that kid is nowhere to be seen
because I'm sure he's going to be
screaming and probably doing more blowin the bathroom.
I don't even think he properly detoxed.
One of those videos,we saw him in the facility.
He had a giant snowflake under his nose.
It's like literally thereI TikTok zoomed in version of it.

(01:46:06):
It's literally how couldand what is it, baby powder?
What was he smelling? Sugar?
I don't think so. He's a mess.
And we do know now that he literallygoes out and parties that very night.
And then it's Thanksgiving,like the next day, and there's a big
altercation that happens.
We talked about it the past episode, sowe kind of know what's going down already.
On the aftershow for this episode,a few things I think are worth noting.

(01:46:30):
Jax is insaneand I don't even know how to address it.
It's exhausting and I'm so tiredof having to listen to Jax
say anything in this aftershowbecause he's just full of crap.
I think we can all agree that nothingJax says
has any weight or substance,and we shouldn't believe any of it.
he faked a heart attackto control his sister

(01:46:51):
and Brittany and stop themtalking about him on the show.
You know what?
Let's quit demonic behavior.
Sacks demonic behavior,
sacks demonic behavior.
Demonic.
Demonic. Demonic.

(01:47:12):
Demonic.
Demonic attacks.
Demonic behavior.
episode,
I am giving the title again to Jax Taylor.
Jax hides the ladder in the house

(01:47:33):
so Brittany can'tget to the camera system.
Okay.
Then Jax fakes a heart attackwhile his sister and Brittany
are talking about him on camera
because he is watching the camerashe's installed in the home or listening.
He's bug them because get thisI researched the make and model
of the security system.
I paused it, I google imagesearch the camera on their ceiling.

(01:47:56):
It does not have sound.
I was like, there's no way this thingdefinitely has sound recording.
It doesn't.
I spent like 20 minutes reading all of theever tech security system information,
and it doesn't have sound,so either he has access
to like the shooting schedule
and knows who's like in the house that daybecause
he's getting an automatic call sheet,

(01:48:16):
which is something in the industrythat happens
and so he knows they're on thereand he's worried they're talking about him
and he's spiralingin the mental health facility,
even though he is supposedto be leaving the next day.
Crazy. So crazy.
Or he has buggedthe house and is listening in.
Either way, he hears Britney on the phonewith his sister

(01:48:37):
and they're talking about him,
and then he goes texts the producerlike tell them to get it all on camera.
Me, me, me.
And then the person is like,how does he know we're here?
And like,they start talking fucking crazy.
So then he calls his sister.
And so that interruptsthe footage that they're taking.
So she takes the call from Jax,and then Jax fakes a heart attack

(01:48:58):
and he has the receptionistat the mental health facility
tell them that he's on his wayto the hospital because I guess his dad
and his other brother have sufferedor died from heart related stuff.
And then because he has to have control,he has to have their attention.
He wants Brittany's sympathy.
He wants her to care about him.
It's disgusting.

(01:49:19):
And I can't believewhatever facility he's at.
I need my social media people.
I need my FBI agents like the BravoHollyoaks that can find out this shit.
Where was he?
Becauseno one should be going to this facility
if they're falling for Jax is shit.
They're not helping anybody in there.
It's just a drain of money.

(01:49:40):
People are throwing money downthe drain. They're.
So we need to find out where it isand, like, make sure nobody goes there.
This is horrible.
I know he's a scary guy,but come on, like,
if you're a receptionistat one of these facilities,
you have to understand, like,how narcissistic and crazy your guests are
and the things that they're going to do,
the awful thingsthey're going to do to their spouses

(01:50:01):
if they're not getting proper help lettingthem have their phones and all the shit.
It's so messy.
So I thinkit's crazy that he's doing all this stuff.
And I think it's crazy that emailsBrittany, even though he's calling
and texting people, he sends her an emailtelling her she has to deal
with all the missed payments on the houseand like, listen to that.

(01:50:21):
Those are like insane points.
This is beyond demonic behavior.
This is like,
I really want her to file a restraining order against him.
He's insane.
These are insane things.
So I mean that that ends demonic behavior,but does it
because Jax Tayloris still living on this planet

(01:50:42):
and it's going to just probably get worseand worse?
And like, on
one hand, I feel really sickbecause I'm like, well, at this point,
how much worse can it get?
Let's fucking say, like, let's go, buddy.
But then I'm like, no,there's a kid involved.
It's horrible.
Like, this is so dark, but I don't know.
At this point.
I'm at the Coliseum and I'm rootingfor these savage barbarian gladiators

(01:51:05):
to fight each other,even though they don't deserve to be there
because they'reprobably captured slaves or,
you know, helpless animals.
I'm just like the savage.
I'm like, let's just go.
Come on. How much crazier can you get?
I challenge you.

(01:51:34):
Back to the after show, though.
I think it's nuts that he fakedthat, heart attack thing.
And you know what?
Honestly, Jackson's faked
heart attack is giving Randallwhen he owed 50 cent money.
Do you remember back when Randall owed 50cent money
and 50 cent, like, posted on Twittera threat like you have 72 hours to get me
my money and riddlepost a picture of himself with like, EKG,

(01:51:58):
like heart monitor stuff on him, shirtlessin like, a hospital.
It was hilarious. It was so pathetic.
And he still ended uppaying 50 cent in time.
But like trying to get like an extensionbecause I'm in the hospital
with a heart thing.
Feel bad for me even though, likeI lied to you and stole all your money.
That's literally how I feel aboutthe jackass faking a heart attack thing.
It's Randall.

(01:52:19):
Do the same.These people are all the same.
Jax, Jesse, Randallthey're all the same type of shit. Had,
and it's crazy.
And they're all Bravo guys,and it's so dark. But
I'm just like, let's go.
Let's play ball.
Even Jesse and Schwartz are like,
we think you did it to Jackson'sface on the aftershow.

(01:52:41):
What? He's like,you think I faked a heart attack?
I'm not that good.
And literally, Schwartzand Jesse are like, yeah, you did like.
Like what?
Insanity.
And then, like, just a minute of backto my thought of, like, Michelle
isn't really friends with these people.
There's a great example of iton the aftershow, Janet starts talking
about how she takes a bath every dayand she, like, never shower.

(01:53:04):
She's only ever takenone shower in her house.
And Michelle had no idea.
But Sheena knew
and I'm just like,
I don't knowif one of my friends told me like,
they they only bathand they never take a shower.
I would remember that.
It's so weird,but also like sounds so defining.
I would remember that about somebody.
And so I really just don't thinkMichelle is actually close friends

(01:53:26):
with these people.
So the fact that she expects themto be throwing parties for her and like,
going crazy for herunprompted, is just kind of surprising.
They probably think she's uncomfortablewith it because she barely talks to them.
She doesn't know anything about them.
I don't know, okay, wait.
And there's somethinglike really interesting
they talk about on the aftershow, too,the background on the Rocco's Bar stuff.

(01:53:48):
So Jack's Bar, it is on the back, like
they cut off a back patiothat wasn't being used.
Is probably, like, literally the employeesmoking section before.
And they turned it into Jack'sBar for a minute.
Britney was going to get her own baron the back of the Rocco's.
That's in West Hollywood,which is by far more popular.
Rocco's like, wow,that's prime real estate.

(01:54:09):
And it's in West Hollywood,so it's near sur.
It's near where pump used to be.
It's near Tomtom, it's nearsomething about her.
So it's in the verse of Bravoin Vanderpump in the Valley.
So if you were coming to visit LAand you want to check out these places
like it would be in prime real estatefor that, it'd be a great decision.
However, it's clear

(01:54:31):
that the partners at Rocco'swanted someone else to come in
and have to deal with Jaxnow that Brittany was bowing out.
Like the guy is too much, she's insane.
We already know that.
He was texting the the owners of Rocco'slike crazy when they changed the sign
the one night like from the rehab thing,texting them like crazy.
I'm sure he's in a pain in the assto have to work with.

(01:54:53):
So at first they triedto make Brittany partner with him
and she was like, no way, I'm not doing itand honestly good for her.
Then they went to Schwartzand they're like, come on Jax.
Like get Schwartz involved.
Schwartz has had a barbefore he can do it.
And Schwartz was like, no thanks. Like,good for you.
Schwartzfinally saying no to somebody for once.
And then Brock, they were like,Brock fixes things up around the house.

(01:55:14):
He could fix up this bar.He could do this and that.
And you knowwhat? Brock is an opportunist.
He might just say,yes, him and Sheena love the hustle.
He might just say yes.
So now Jax is teasing itlike it's a Brock Schwartz Jax thing.
Like,that's way too many cooks in the kitchen.
No one's going to get on board with it.
And basically it like fell through there.
And we're not talking about it anymore.

(01:55:35):
But I thought it was really interesting
that this like, conversationwas going on about who is going to get
to have to work with
Jax and deal with Jax becausethe owners of Rocco's don't want to do it.
The new managers don't want to do it.
So that's the aftershow.
That's the end of the aftershow.
Let's take a quick breakand then we will jump

(01:55:55):
into a little bit of Love Hotel.
ho. Okay, so on Love Island,
I am not surprised that Shannon and IRLstill have some drama going.

(01:56:18):
I don't think it's fabricated,
but I also don't think that they're, like,the smartest match.
I just think Shannon's
so afraid of rejectionand so afraid of coming out of the show.
Not in a relationshipthat she's kind of like pushing herself.
You know, maybe she maybe it's goodthat she's pushing herself
outside of her limits,because I don't think

(01:56:39):
she's in a life placewhere she's able to love another.
I think she's just got too much going onwhere she needs to sit back
and just worry about healing. Shannon.
But I also think that she's, like,propelling herself forward, not stopping,
not slowing down since the DUI, in the carcrash and everything.
Like I, I know it'sbeen time since that happened, but I

(01:57:01):
still don't think that work has been doneand you can feel it in her energy.
And so the fear of rejection,the fear of coming out of this love show
without a match,is making her push herself to be with IRL,
and that is causing lots of tension.
And the crying in the hotel room,like the uncontrollable sobbing

(01:57:22):
and all the girls having to come like asif someone died is crazy.
All because you got angryat her for not care.
I mean, don't get me wrong,I'm not dismissing Earl.
Earl's crazy to the fact that he's like,you didn't care enough about me
and my homes.
Like you weren't monitoring it with me.
Do you think it's weird that they weren't,like, monitoring it together?

(01:57:42):
I think it's weirdthat he wasn't talking about it to her.
But then again, how was she to knowhe was that worried?
If he doesn't say anything?
Like all of that feels weird, too.
So I don't know.
The Shannon thing I don't thinkis going to work out for anybody.
I don't think it comes as a as a surprisethat Giselle hasn't made a connection.

(01:58:03):
I don't think she came into the housereally looking for one.
It was weird.
It's like she kind of was open to it,but her type feels very specific.
And these guysall felt like they were for her.
So I still don't understandwhy she's there.
She's she's just she'skind of giving me like, Garcelle energy
and like hertype is going to be really hard to find.

(01:58:27):
It's got to be like an ex pro
athlete or an ex actorwho likes to travel the world, or
like a European guy who owns some big luxecompany and likes to travel the world.
She wants a Phil,but she doesn't like Phil.
She's not attracted to Phil's bodyor Phil's temperament or Phil's way,

(01:58:48):
which is funny because Phil's clearly gotlots of money and he throws fun parties
and like Phil, might have beena really good match for even a Shannon
if Shannon was healed,you know, if Shannon was a healed person,
maybe Phil would have been a good match,but she just did.
Shannon doesn't have the compositionor the composure for Phil,
and Giselle has those things, butshe's just not at all interested in Phil.

(01:59:11):
Phil feels a little old for her too,I don't know, so that's why
I think about Giselle.
Ashley is still goingwith the daddy stuff.
I now that we know that Ashley's like backfilming her show
and with the guy that looks likeJack Harlow, I'm starting to think that,
you know,she just broke up with him to come do
love hotel and wasn'tactually looking for love either.

(01:59:32):
I think the only personthat's really looking for love was Shannon
and Luann, and Shannon isn't healed,so it was never going to work.
The Ashley stuff is weird.
And likewhile they clearly felt disrespected
because she kept tagging him along,but then like, wasn't really into him,
she was clearly obsessed with Ralph.
I don't know, didI think it was a little weird

(01:59:53):
that Ralph was like, getting teary eyedand saying he was trying
not to fall in love with her.
Yes, but also no.
She's a total dimeand he would be lucky to have Ashley.
But I just think, like they weren'treally connecting on a deeper level.
So it's weird for him to thinkthat he was in love with her.
I think he just was like obsessed with herbecause they're filming the show,

(02:00:16):
staying in a hotel.
They're isolated and she's probablyall he thinks about 24 seven.
But then again,she was like obsessed with him, too,
and like, leading him on and like,I, I don't think she's leading him on.
I think she really is into him.
But I don't think she's into himlong term,
which is sador like she's not sure what she wants.
And now we know she's not with him.
So let's get to Lou.

(02:00:37):
And finally,because there were paparazzi photos
that Luann had takenand posted literally on her TikTok of her
with a big diamond engagementring on in a car service, pulling away
like singing like the Love Hotelor whatever that stupid song is that her
and James are always singing.
With her ring on.
And so it's making everyone whisper about,like, who is she engaged to?

(02:01:02):
Is it James? Who is it?
It's clearly not Mark.
Mark can't handle that. He's losing.
He makes a last ditch effort with Giselle,and it's almost comedic.
And Giselle, like,literally calls him out on it.
Which is crazy, because I actually dothink Giselle is kind of Mark's type,
but he got cornered into the Luann thing
so quickly because Luann wanted himthat I don't think

(02:01:26):
he got a chance to really pursue Giselleor get to even know her.
But it's too late now, Mark.
It's way too late.
And I think I honestly think
James is just the right amount of crazyfor Luann.
James gives like, swinger light vibes.
Like if Luann turned around and wantedto, like, be a swinger or hook up
with a young guy like a Joe Bradleywhen she's on her burlesque tour.

(02:01:49):
Honestly, I could see James being downto let her do it.
He just seems freaky and funand he scratches that itch for her
the right kind of itch.
And he's also like, just enough crazy.
Luann likes it.
Luann likes that he claims that he lovesher and like that she's his girlfriend.
And he's like, don't touch her.
She's mine. Like Luann loves that shit.

(02:02:11):
So while everyone else is reacting andis like, that's crazy, this guy's crazy.
But it's like, no, it's not crazythat he wants me to be his.
And I'm happybecause, like, at the end of the day,
I think we all just wanted to see Luannget with somebody.
You know, out of all those women,
I think we all knewLuann would hook up with people,

(02:02:32):
but we wanted her to find her next person
because, you know, she's starting hernew seven year phase.
Okay, I just did a little research.
If Luann is still with Jamesand what that rock was, and Luann
came outand said that that sparkly, flashy ring

(02:02:53):
was not an engagement ring,it was not even a real diamond.
Of course, she's just doing it forfor the clout for people to talk a little.
But an insider to page six,
and reality.com is reporting
that she did spill some tea recently,

(02:03:14):
that she is dating the Hamptons
real estate agent, Michael Remer Schmid.
And he's a
friend close to Lou or a friend closeto Lou.
Also revealed that Michael attendedthe gray van by a Roma 360
event in the Hamptons over Memorial Dayweekend.

(02:03:36):
It was there
that the realtor was introducing himselfas her boyfriend.
The spy shared with an outletthat he was there with Lewin's daughter,
Lauren's daughters boyfriend Andre,and Luann and her daughter
Victoria were at a wellness retreatfor the weekend.

(02:03:57):
Dorinda was deejaying the event, too.
That's hilarious.
And an insider shared that Luannsent them in her place to support,
and it was cute, so I guess she doesn'tend up staying with James.
Spoiler alert.
But she does have a new boyfriend thatshe met in the Hamptons over Memorial Day.
Or sorry,it was confirmed that she has a boyfriend.

(02:04:19):
And in the Hamptons on Memorial Day,so it sounds like she's going
to have a nice summer, with her familyand with this new guy.
Real estate in the Hamptonssounds pretty lucrative.
So sounds like he could be a winner.
And that'sit for this week's meeting of Bravo.
Horlicks. Anonymous.
We really ran the reality TV gantlettoday,

(02:04:42):
from Love Island Chaos to the Valleydoubleheader,
Love Hotel, Wild Cardsand the final summer House rankings.
And of course,we had to talk about the copycat
conspiracies swirling aroundPaige to serve as new pajama line.
Daphne, which may or may not be
a satin clad twin for another TikTokbrand.
Meanwhile, Amanda's new bikiniline dropped

(02:05:04):
and let's just saythe tops are doing something.
If you love this solo spiral,make sure to subscribe!
Leave a five star review and follow meon Instagram and TikTok at filmmaker
for more. Bravo chaos, fashion critiques
and the occasional deep dive into TikTokbrand beef.
And as always, keep your champagne coldand your taglines iconic.

(02:05:27):
We'll see you next week.

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