September 2, 2024 • 32 mins
Anthony was by himself when he first learned he had dementia. He didn’t feel like he had a close-knit family or a group of friends to turn to for support.
But now, Anthony’s not only made new friends and become closer with his three siblings – he’s also found love again.
So much changes after being diagnosed with dementia, including your relationships. But it doesn’t mean you have to let go of them. When Dom’s father was diagnosed with dementia, she took on some of the caring duties, but she didn’t want to lose their father-daughter dynamic. It took some creative thinking and a lot of practice, but it was worth the effort to keep the relationship strong.
Hold the Moment co-host Jim Rogers is still figuring out what friendship and romance looks like now he’s living with younger onset dementia. And co-host Hamish Macdonald who is navigating the changes with his father, who’s living with dementia with Lewy bodies and Parkinson’s.
Join them to hear how others are managing their relationships after a diagnosis.
The Dementia Australia website has resources about relationships for carers, family and friends, as well as people living with dementia here.
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Hold the Moment is a podcast from Dementia Australia, produced by Deadset Studios and hosted by Jim Rogers and Hamish Macdonald.
For support, you can contact the National Dementia Helpline on 1800 100 500 (24 hours a day, seven days a week). The National Dementia Helpline is funded by the Australian Government.
Follow Dementia Australia on Facebook and Instagram or find support resources on our website.
This episode was produced by Liam Riordan. Sound design by Sean Holden. The executive producers are Grace Pashley and Kellie Riordan. Production manager is Ann Chesterman.
Dementia Australia and Deadset Studios acknowledge the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognise their continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to their Elders past and present, and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples today.
Dementia Australia acknowledges and appreciates the support of the Australian Government for this initiative.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
- Hello, my name is Kevin.
I am a First Nations advocatewith Dementia Australia.
These lands in which we aremeeting are many countries
filled with languagessimilar and different.
For more than 50,000 years,we have come together
to trade knowledge, tolearn, and to teach.
Today, we joined tokeep up that tradition.
So with that in mind,we now pay our respects
(00:22):
to the traditional owners,to Elders past and present,
to those First Nationspeople joining us here today.
- I met Kylie in Brisbane,
through a walking football tournament,
Kylie had flown over witha couple of her friends,
(00:42):
and it wasn't a greatvenue because the floor
was very slippery, and I did my knee,
but I found out since then thatKylie had seen me that day,
and thought, "Who's this madman throwing himself around?"
- I'd been playing andhe was on the sideline,
he had crutches, he'd beeninjured the day before
(01:03):
in the tournament, and I justwent up and said, "Hello"
- And I said, "Hello."
- Thought, "Hmm, he's an interesting guy."
We talked a little bit.
- And I just was smittened.
I just got to get to know her.
I didn't even contemplateabout her living in Adelaide.
I didn't actually knowit at that point in time,
but even when I did, itjust didn't occur to me
(01:23):
how that was going to work.
I just wanted to get to know her.
We just clicked, bonded, andshe's such a beautiful person.
- A couple of weeks later,I came up to Brisbane
to watch the Women's World Cup,
and we're at a park,
(01:46):
and I asked Anthonyabout how he got involved
with Dementia Australia,
and that's when he toldme about his diagnosis.
And I pretty much thought, "Holy shit!"
(both laugh)
And I did think about researching it,
(02:07):
I went back to Adelaide,and we kept talking,
and that's when I decided,actually, I'd rather get
to know Anthony than getto know his diagnosis.
Just kind of figured thatwe really liked each other.
We had its connection, and you know,
(02:28):
just no one knows what'sgoing to happen in life,
so let's just live now.
- Meeting new people ishard at the best of times,
(02:50):
but Anthony and Kylie's story is proof
that you can forge new, lovingrelationships with dementia.
I am Jim Rogers, andthis is Hold the Moment,
a podcast from Dementia Australia
about life after diagnosis.
- And I'm Hamish MacDonald,and you're not wrong, Jim,
life is already full oftricky relationship dynamics,
(03:12):
not just romantic ones, withfriends and with family too.
And then, when you adddementia into the mix,
it can be pretty hard tonavigate how things change
between you and someone you love.
So you're about to hearmore of Anthony's story,
who found friends andlove after his diagnosis,
as well as Dom's story, whotry to be a great daughter
(03:35):
to her dad, as well as his carer.
- Yeah, it sure is a challenge.
I know you've dealtwith all of this Hamish,
with your friends, who've gotdementia, as well as your dad.
Are you ever worried aboutsaying the wrong thing
or know how to be there for them now?
- Nah, not really. Let's go meet Anthony.
(04:02):
- My name is Anthony, I'm 67,
and I've been diagnosedwith young-onset dementia,
and I have got Alzheimer'sversion of that.
- So, tell us a little bit about
who was in your lifebefore your diagnosis.
- Before my diagnosis,the most people in my life
were people I worked with,I was in a relationship
(04:24):
which changed after my diagnosis.
- When did you first sort ofstart to notice your symptoms?
- Well, I actually didn'tstart to notice them myself.
The person I was inthat relationship with,
- Ah!
- Was noticing symptoms,
so she kept pushing me to getchecked, which did lead me
(04:46):
to go to my GP, which then led to go on to
a geriatrician, which led togoing to a neuropsychologist,
which led to a diagnosis.
Even though I was in that relationship,
I was still on my own.
I lived on my own, and Icouldn't go to the hospital
to see the doctor becausewe aren't allowed.
(05:06):
So I got a phone call, and whileI was in my unit by myself,
and my first reaction was Ijust received a death sentence.
It just totally shocked me.
Well, because my partner was pushing me
to see a doctor.
- Yeah.
- The next step was I had to tell her,
(05:28):
and it wasn't a warm, supportive reaction.
- And she wasn't withyou for that diagnosis,
you were alone?
- No, I was alone in my unit. Yeah.
So I felt isolated and very lonely then,
and particularly when Ididn't get any support.
- That's sad, and I believeyou've got siblings?
(05:51):
How did they handle thenews of your diagnosis?
- Very well. It essentiallycaused us to come closer.
- Okay.
I've got two brothers and a sister,
and my next oldest brother,
we talk twice a week every week now,
and just to catch up, just to say hello,
(06:14):
and we never used to do that.
To get the lack of supportfrom the person I was with
at the time, and thenhave a different reaction
from my brothers and sister,
it was confusing, but thetime was confusing anyway,
because I didn't know whatwas going to happen to me,
and I didn't know whetherin 12-months' time
(06:35):
I was going to be notdriving, or whatever,
what my future held.
- Terrifying.- Yes.
You know, now it's differentbecause I know more,
but it was very confronting and confusing,
because I didn't have the knowledge.
I didn't really have any othersupport in the where I live,
(06:56):
and so, my only support wasmy siblings in another state,
and kind of, that helped me a lot,
the fact that they weresupportive because, you know,
I was very lonely and very scared,
and you know, at timeswas, like I said before,
you may not want to be here,but through their support
(07:17):
and their encouragement,that changed that.
- And so, your relationshipsort of broke down
from your diagnosis?
- Yes.
- How was the datingscene or what happened?
- Well, after that,after a period of time,
I was still wanting someone in my life,
and I tried the dating appsand that, and met a few people,
(07:41):
but I always feel I shouldbe upfront and honest.
I would not like to get in a relationship,
and then six months downthe track, kill that person.
So, I was always upfront and honest.
And I was pretty well ahundred percent every time,
they walked away.
- And so, that must havebeen so hard for you
to find the right personor even tackle that.
(08:01):
- It was difficult, but Istill felt I needed to stick
to my core values, and explain that
because it's a very importantpiece of information.
I mean we all know that youcan get into relationship,
and who knows what canhappen down the track,
but this was a pre-diagnosis,so I felt I really had
to be honest, and I got thestage where I just thought,
(08:24):
"Well, this is not going to work.
I'll just have to be contentthat I'll be on my own."
But I went to my GPand she said, you know,
"Find some social company,some sport perhaps,
try and start that way,
and to get yourself out of it,
and talk to more people,"which is not normally
(08:44):
what I do before diagnosis either.
So I said, "Right, I'llget on the internet,
and Google 'sport for over sixties',
and by chance, I cameacross walking football.
- Tell us a little bit about
what is walking football?How does it work?
- Well, in Australia, it'sprobably more appropriate
(09:05):
to call it walking soccer.
And it's just like a smallversion, safer version of
the running game of soccer.
Firstly, it's five or six people aside,
usually with goalkeepers,
and each side will havea different coloured bib,
and usually, it's a referee.
(09:26):
The whistle goes, kick off,it's walking so they can't run,
so they have to pass it,
opposition will walk up towards you,
try and stop you passing,
there's no tackling as such,
so they have to relyon you to make mistake,
or you pressuring them todo something with the ball.
(09:47):
So therefore, the technicalskill is then to know
where your other players are,and to pass the ball to them.
And people walk at different speeds.
But it can be very highly competitive
and it can be very social.
We have all parts of that game,
and the one that I playedis highly competitive.
(10:09):
We played against a young side
they'd be in their early twenties.
They played the running game,we challenged them to a game.
They thought, "Ha ha,we're going to smash these,
take the running out, takethe physical part out,
and we smashed them five-nil.
So it just proves what the game's like.
(10:33):
it levels the field for all abilities.
- So was it nerve wracking whenyou very first started this
walking football, and youwent to meet new people,
did you feel anxious becauseof your dementia diagnosis?
- I didn't tell themfor a while, you know.
(10:54):
I felt really good with walking football
because I felt accepted.
And particularly, asI became a goalkeeper,
and turns out to be a good one,
The best moment I ever hadon walking football field
was the day that someone gaveme the nickname "The Wall".
(11:18):
There was a day you playedfor an hour and a half,
I never let a goal in, no one got past me,
and the person that does ourFacebook and that thinking,
"Oh, what can I write?It's just like a wall."
And that's where it came from, "The Wall".
And I've never had anickname, not a positive one,
(11:42):
particularly growing up where I do,
and I just, "Wow, that's amazing.
I've got a nickname. That's awesome."
Which made me feel like I was somebody.
- Yeah. Which is what you want, you know,
particularly when you're new to the sport.
- Yeah, yeah. So I was like first picked,
(12:02):
as against like in school whenyou're last or never picked,
and that's really, really helped me a lot
to feel that belonging.
- Yeah.- And then, after a while,
once I got to know more people,
I went on the committee, andthen I told the committee,
and then it sort of went fromthere, told a few other people
(12:26):
and they all accepted it.
A lot of them come andask questions about it,
which I thought was great.
And most people said, "Oh, wewouldn't know you've had it."
- So, not only has walkingfootball brought new friendships
to your life, it's also brought love.
(12:48):
You met Kylie through thesport, so how did she react
when she found out about your diagnosis?
- Well, Kylie's a very specialperson, and she came back
and said, "Well, thediagnosis doesn't define you
as a person", and wantedto get to know me more,
which is just amazing.
- Tell me, what did that mean to you
(13:10):
for her to react in that way?
- Oh, that was so special.
That just made me feel so wonderful.
I thought, well maybe there'sa chance. Totally unexpected.
I was expecting the same
- Rejection.
- Rejection, and the fact thatKylie lived in another state,
(13:31):
would've made it veryeasy for her to do that.
- So you were originally in Brisbane,
and Kylie was in Adelaide.
So, in order to make thiswork, you have to think,
"Okay, somehow I've gotto get this, you know,
easier for us to be intouch with each other."
- We'd fly to Melbourne,or I'd fly to Adelaide,
or she'd fly to Brisbane,
and that's just not sustainable long term.
(13:53):
So, my lease was coming up, and I thought,
"Well, what do I do?Ah, bugger it." Sorry.
(both laugh)
- That's okay.- I'll move to Adelaide.
I can still do walking football there.
I can still do work withDementia Australia's advocacy.
I can do everything in Adelaidethat I can do in Brisbane.
(14:15):
- And now, you are based in Adelaide
and the friends that you'vegot there that you're starting
to get to know, the networkyou're starting to get to know,
how do they come across with the diagnosis
that you've talked to them about?
Or do they ask you questions?Are they interested?
Are they curious? What sortof reaction have you had?
- A lot of them don't know.- Really?
(14:35):
- At this stage.
There's a few that do.No one asks the question.
So, a lot of people don't know.
And that's fine for the moment.
- Yeah, I think it'sa tricky one isn't it?
I mean, part of you, in my own experience,
part of you doesn't reallywant to talk about it,
(14:56):
because you know, it's a bitof a downer to talk about it,
but then part of you sortof wants to acknowledge it.
It's a fine line isn't it,to sort of get it right.
- It is, and if peopleknow and they asked,
I am more than willingto talk and, you know,
educate them about what it's like.
- Yep.
(15:17):
- And to try and help them understand.
because they might haveother family relatives that
may get a diagnosis, orthey may get one themselves.
And that, to me, is educational,is to help them understand
but I only do that if they ask.
(15:42):
- Hi, my name's Dom. Mydad had vascular dementia.
His name is Noel O'Leary,and he was a plumber,
and a very warm, lovely personality.
He had a great sense of humour
and yeah, I was hisadvocate, carer, entertainer,
a looker-afterer, and daughter.
(all laugh)
- It sounds like you'rereally close to your dad.
(16:03):
- Yeah.
- Tell me about him.What kind of guy was he?
- Dad used to wear crisp, cotton shirts,
and there were alwayslike colourful patterns,
and he would always iron them beautifully,
and always be well presented.He was warm, funny.
He was pretty much everybody's friend.
He was very social and he loved fishing,
(16:25):
he loved telling a joke so we often read
from the dad joke book Ibrought up on visits to him.
He worked for himself his whole life,
so I found him so inspiring as a kid.
I ended up working for myself,just inspired by his ethics,
and you know, his working ethic,so he was my hero, my dad,
(16:48):
but he was also probably oneof my most favourite people
in the world.
- When you are that close to someone
and you see them receiving that diagnosis,
what's it like for you?
How did you take all of that?
- Obviously, grief and shock straight up.
(17:09):
I was already concernedthat might be the case,
that he may have dementia,
but I had to really quickly always be,
feel like I was neverlooking sad in front of him,
always in control and using humour
throughout his illness tomake him feel confident
(17:31):
that he was being cared for properly,
and to make him just not worry,
and not see that we'reall worried about him,
so it was that falsebravado that we put on.
I'd often put on the falseface, do a lot of laughing,
joking, confident stuff with him,
and then I'd have toleave the room sometimes
and have a bit of a cry. Yeah.
(17:52):
- Because it's quite hard forchildren, as well, to cope
with that, as I'm sureyou would find, Hamish,
with your dad and your siblings.
- Yeah, a hundred percent.
- It's a bit of a team effort, really,
of what's going to happen in the future.
- It's scary because you feellike you're making decisions
that are possibly quite consequential.
- There is definitely rolereversal and you notice that
(18:14):
as the first thing.
In the very first meeting,
when I took dad to thegeriatrician with mum,
and we heard the diagnosis,we had a test in the meeting,
and pretty much straightup, the geriatrician said,
"You have severe, moderatevascular dementia."
And afterwards, I talkedwith him after the meeting
(18:36):
and said, "How do you feel about this?
Have you been worried aboutyour cognitive thinking?
Have you been concerned?"
And he said, "Yes, yes I have."
And mom and I told himhe's not to worry anymore,
we are the ones that are going to take on
all his responsibilities in life.
He is just to enjoy himselfand we'll be his carers,
and make sure he lives a happy life.
(18:58):
- It's finding a fine line, isn't it,
to really just find the right balance.
- It is. Luckily, he had that sense of,
he loved ridiculous humour,
so I could hide behind that a little bit.
Whether it was like when I washelping him eat at lunchtime,
when he got quite bad,helping him eat food,
I would often like just breakout and play the spoons,
(19:20):
just do a random, andthat would make him laugh.
And then, then I knew Iwas connecting with him.
Sometimes, we'd playmusic, his favourite music
to enliven him if he wassleeping and not eating.
- What kind of music?
- He loved Phantom ofthe Opera, strangely,
so we would play that, youknow how it starts off...
(19:43):
Everyone else in the wing would be like,
"Oh my goodness, what is this music?
It sounds like a funeral."
(all laugh)
(Violin music plays)
- So Dom, tell me how did your mum react
to your dad's diagnosis?
- So, mum was devastated. of course.
(20:05):
Mum and dad have been together 56 years,
so they're a very, very loving couple.
Mum went into straight into grief.
She was grieving the wholetime Dad had dementia,
but she was amazing.
She managed to be braveand very loving for dad,
and she did some incredible things
that I'm really proud of watching her do.
(20:26):
She helped dad keep his sense of self.
When dad had to go into aged care,
because she was caring for him at home,
and when it became too dangerousfor him to stay at home
because he was having falls, she made sure
that he kept his senseof self by taking all
of his shirts home everyafternoon, and laundering
(20:47):
and ironing them exactlyhow dad would've done,
because he was a crazy ironer,
and if the laundry tookany of dad's shirts,
she would make a beelinedown to the laundry
in the aged care home andsteal the shirts back,
so they just looked perfect for dad,
and he was probably theonly man in aged care
that wasn't in his pyjamas,
but she really helped himretain his sense of self.
(21:10):
- That's amazing. That'sso important as you say,
to help keep that personclose to being who they were.
- Exactly. - And how aboutyour dad after the diagnosis?
Did he do things aswell that you recollect,
maybe protected you guys a little?
- I was the one to have
to tell dad he was going into aged care,
(21:30):
and I still have a lot ofgrief thinking about it.
It was one of the hardestthings I've ever done,
but dad made it much easier for mum and I,
we had taken him outto coffee that morning,
and I had driven himto the aged care home,
and I told him in the carthat he was having to go
just away for a few weekswhile mum needed a lot of rest
(21:53):
because she was very tired.
And I said to him, "Do you understand?"
And he said, "Yes, yes I do."
And I started getting a bitteary, and he could see that,
and I said, "Thanks for understanding.
You're amazing, aren't you?"And he said, "Yes, yes I am."
And I said, "and you're reallyhumble too, aren't you?"
(all laugh)
And he said, "Yes, yes I am."
(22:15):
- So, everyone's turning upwith this kind of fake bravado
trying to make everyone else feel better.
- Yeah. Yeah.
And these are the moments when you,
I mean talking about false bravado,
suddenly you don't care anymore.
You are just there makingpeople happy, and yourself,
because it's somethingyou can hide behind,
(22:36):
laughter and humour, and it'simportant as well just to...
- you've got to hold onto it, haven't you?
- You do.- So how do you feel, Jim,
about your kids adapting?
I mean, you've talked to mein the past about the changing
dynamics with your husband, Tyler,
but I'm just kind of wonderingabout the kids as well?
- I think with my kidsand my kids' partners,
(22:58):
I try and be jovial, chat,
and enjoy a beer with the boys,
and don't really want togo down that road too much.
And they, I think theyrespect that in me as well,
because they, I think theyavoid saying, "How are you?"
You know, and we talk abouteverything and anything but that
- This is the false bravadothat you were talking about.
(23:19):
- Yeah. And I think it's really important,
it's living a day at a time,
and celebrating the moment you're in now,
which I think is reallyimportant with dementia,
living in the moment you're in, and not,
I think that's whereanticipatory grief comes in
when you start worryingabout what's going to happen.
- So Dom, you did lotsof things to try and keep
your father-daughterrelationship alive, I guess,
(23:44):
while he was deteriorating.
- Yes.
- How did you make that distinction,
and how did you help foster that?
- I made tools.
I knew I would have baddays when he had a bad day,
and I would be, how am I goingto keep up this happy front?
You can't do it all the time.
So I thought, I'll make a book for dad.
(24:04):
So I started with a ring binder folder,
I started with a few little stories
about dad when he was young,some photos of him growing up.
I reached out to his siblings and said,
"Do you mind like sharing somestories about," funny stories
because he always hadfunny stories in his life
about growing up together,
and they wrote like two pages of stories,
(24:25):
put them in the book.
I started writing stories on our travel,
we had some funny things happen
when we were travelling overseas together.
I put pictures with every story,
and each time I visited, Iwould bring him up a new story.
And I thought, this is a greatway to give him something
to look forward to. I would say,
"there's going to be anotherstory next week, just wait."
(24:46):
And it also helped me if I washaving a particularly sad day
and I didn't feel it, likeI could really cheer him up,
or I thought I can go to that book
and just start reading from it,
and it's got the funny stories in it,
so it was like a good backup plan for me,
and I thought it would bereally helpful during Covid,
when nurses...
(25:07):
- To know about him, justlook into his life a little.
- Yeah, they could read to him about it,
- That's fantastic.
- And visitors, I often notice,
not just with our relatives or friends,
but dad had a good friendas well that would visit,
and he did say to us, "I'mso nervous, I don't know",
because dad was non-verbalmost of the time,
"I don't know how totalk to Noel anymore."
(25:28):
So I thought, this is agreat go-to for him as well.
He can just either point at the pictures
or read some stories.
Yeah, but I didn't noticejust in the home, in general,
people being scared, notknowing how to engage
with people with dementia.
- Yeah.
- So it was a great toolkit for, yeah.
- Well, that can be very conconfusing for people, right?
(25:48):
Because they're used to, like, I get calls
all the time now from familyor dad's friends saying,
"I can't really, like yourdad's not answering the phone,
he's not replying to emails."
I call him, and I can barelyhear him, and that's true,
he's just losing all of that function.
- Yeah, yeah.
But I don't really know what the,
I don't know what the solution is.
So I end up going to visit him.
(26:10):
We go through all his emailsand his messages, and we reply
or do stuff, and then as I'mleaving, I'll call back one
of the friends, put it onthe loudest speaker phone
and put it on dad's chestand say, "Off you go."
- That's great. - I don't knowif it's a very good solution.
And Jim, have you noticedany of your friends
reacting in different or interesting ways
(26:30):
when they learn about your diagnosis?
- Yeah, as you said earlier,
everybody's different the way they react.
Some of my friends are super positive
and really look for,will I do that, you know,
I'm forgetful, and stuff like that.
But some of my friendsdon't really mention it
or discuss it, and I thinkthey get the vibe from me
that let's just be positive and carry on.
(26:50):
But a couple of my close friend,
really close friends have been to
awareness about dementia,and really invested
and read upon it, you know,
and spent a lot of time finding out stuff.
But some of my mates justare very jovial about it,
and don't really want to deal with it.
- The ones that have investedin figuring things out
(27:13):
about it, and learning, andtaking courses or whatever,
what's that meant to you?
- A Lot. Yeah, it's meant a lot,
because Caroline and Nat,who, you know, went on holiday
with Ty and I recently, they both went
and did a course and learnt about it,
but they're very in touchwith a lot of stuff,
and they're very understanding,and I feel very relaxed
(27:34):
because I don't have to putany bravado on, which is
exactly what you're chattingabout earlier, with them.
If they say or do thewrong thing, you say,
"Go back to the course."
(All laugh)
- Do some homework.
- I don't, but I should.
- I think the most importantthing I'd tell anybody
(27:54):
that says you know, you dohear this often, people say,
"What's the point of visitingpeople in an aged care home,
because they're oftenasleep or they're not,
they've got dementia, you know,
they're not going to engage with us."
I think an important thingis trying to reach in
to your loved ones withdementia by using tools,
by reading them stories fromtheir past, by playing games,
(28:17):
even if it's, or colouring in,
just enjoyable things you can do together,
and I think when people saythere's no quality of life
for someone, even with advanceddementia, I really disagree
because to me, I thinkquality of life is reaching in
and connecting with someone you love.
(28:47):
- If you're strugglingwith how your friendships
and family relationships havechanged since your diagnosis,
or if you are the friend whojust isn't quite sure what
to say, you can call theNational Dementia Helpline
and talk to an advisor like Kristin.
They're here to help.
- After a diagnosis of dementia,
(29:08):
you might feel like so manythings are going to change,
and one of the ones youmight be really worried about
is the changes in yourrelationship with your partner.
If you're worried about
how your relationship's going to change,
or maybe you've alreadynoticed that it has
and you want to talkto somebody about that,
Dementia Australia offerssupport on the helpline,
(29:30):
or with counselling, sothat you and your partner
can talk about how you're both feeling,
and talk about waysthat you can make things
a little better,
maybe even a little fun as you go.
It can be really difficultwhen you find out
that you've got a diagnosis of dementia,
and you really want to reach out
(29:52):
to the people that you love,your friends and family,
but it feels like they're pulling away.
I've spoken to a number offriends who call the helpline
because they don't know what to say,
and often, I'll ask them,
"What do you usually talkto the person about?"
And you know, maybe it'sfooty or maybe it's flowers,
(30:13):
or maybe it's a jokethat you've always had,
and I encourage them to just start there.
One thing that might makeit easier for your friends
is to let them know howthey can be with you,
how they can make thefriendship work easier.
So maybe at golf, it's hardfor you to write the score,
(30:36):
your friend can do that for you,
and you can let them know that.
And when you're making new friends,
you don't have to tell themright away, "I have dementia."
It's okay to talk to them
about anything elseyou'd want to talk about.
Eventually, it might comeup just like anything else
would in conversation.
(30:59):
If you want to talk more
about anything you'veheard on this episode,
like navigating new territoryin your relationships,
you can contact the NationalDementia Helpline on
1800 100 500.
We're available 24-hours aday, every day of the year.
Give us a call.
(31:29):
- Hold the Moment is a podcastfrom Dementia Australia.
It's produced by Deadset Studios.
You can find more episodes and resources
through the Dementia Australiawebsite, dementia.org au.
And don't forget to follow Hold the Moment
in your podcast app, soyou don't miss an episode.
The show is hosted by me, Jim Rogers,
(31:49):
- And by me, Hamish MacDonald,
The executive producers areKelly Ridden and Grace Pashley.
The producer is Liam Ridden,sound design by Sean Holden.
A special thanks to the wholeteam at Dementia Australia,
and to all the advocates
who shared their stories on this podcast.
- If you are enjoying Hold the Moment,
you can leave us a review or rate us
(32:09):
in whatever podcast app youare listening to right now.
It really does help otherpeople struggling with dementia
find the show, and we'dlove to hear from you.
- Hello, my name is Kevin.
I am a First Nations advocatewith Dementia Australia.
These lands in which we aremeeting are many countries
filled with languagessimilar and different.
For more than 50,000 years,we have come together
to trade knowledge, tolearn, and to teach.
Today, we joined tokeep up that tradition.
So with that in mind,we now pay our respects
(00:22):
to the traditional owners,to Elders past and present,
to those First Nationspeople joining us here today.
- I met Kylie in Brisbane,
through a walking football tournament,
Kylie had flown over witha couple of her friends,
(00:42):
and it wasn't a greatvenue because the floor
was very slippery, and I did my knee,
but I found out since then thatKylie had seen me that day,
and thought, "Who's this madman throwing himself around?"
- I'd been playing andhe was on the sideline,
he had crutches, he'd beeninjured the day before
(01:03):
in the tournament, and I justwent up and said, "Hello"
- And I said, "Hello."
- Thought, "Hmm, he's an interesting guy."
We talked a little bit.
- And I just was smittened.
I just got to get to know her.
I didn't even contemplateabout her living in Adelaide.
I didn't actually knowit at that point in time,
but even when I did, itjust didn't occur to me
(01:23):
how that was going to work.
I just wanted to get to know her.
We just clicked, bonded, andshe's such a beautiful person.
- A couple of weeks later,I came up to Brisbane
to watch the Women's World Cup,
and we're at a park,
(01:46):
and I asked Anthonyabout how he got involved
with Dementia Australia,
and that's when he toldme about his diagnosis.
And I pretty much thought, "Holy shit!"
(both laugh)
And I did think about researching it,
(02:07):
I went back to Adelaide,and we kept talking,
and that's when I decided,actually, I'd rather get
to know Anthony than getto know his diagnosis.
Just kind of figured thatwe really liked each other.
We had its connection, and you know,
(02:28):
just no one knows what'sgoing to happen in life,
so let's just live now.
- Meeting new people ishard at the best of times,
(02:50):
but Anthony and Kylie's story is proof
that you can forge new, lovingrelationships with dementia.
I am Jim Rogers, andthis is Hold the Moment,
a podcast from Dementia Australia
about life after diagnosis.
- And I'm Hamish MacDonald,and you're not wrong, Jim,
life is already full oftricky relationship dynamics,
(03:12):
not just romantic ones, withfriends and with family too.
And then, when you adddementia into the mix,
it can be pretty hard tonavigate how things change
between you and someone you love.
So you're about to hearmore of Anthony's story,
who found friends andlove after his diagnosis,
as well as Dom's story, whotry to be a great daughter
(03:35):
to her dad, as well as his carer.
- Yeah, it sure is a challenge.
I know you've dealtwith all of this Hamish,
with your friends, who've gotdementia, as well as your dad.
Are you ever worried aboutsaying the wrong thing
or know how to be there for them now?
- Nah, not really. Let's go meet Anthony.
(04:02):
- My name is Anthony, I'm 67,
and I've been diagnosedwith young-onset dementia,
and I have got Alzheimer'sversion of that.
- So, tell us a little bit about
who was in your lifebefore your diagnosis.
- Before my diagnosis,the most people in my life
were people I worked with,I was in a relationship
(04:24):
which changed after my diagnosis.
- When did you first sort ofstart to notice your symptoms?
- Well, I actually didn'tstart to notice them myself.
The person I was inthat relationship with,
- Ah!
- Was noticing symptoms,
so she kept pushing me to getchecked, which did lead me
(04:46):
to go to my GP, which then led to go on to
a geriatrician, which led togoing to a neuropsychologist,
which led to a diagnosis.
Even though I was in that relationship,
I was still on my own.
I lived on my own, and Icouldn't go to the hospital
to see the doctor becausewe aren't allowed.
(05:06):
So I got a phone call, and whileI was in my unit by myself,
and my first reaction was Ijust received a death sentence.
It just totally shocked me.
Well, because my partner was pushing me
to see a doctor.
- Yeah.
- The next step was I had to tell her,
(05:28):
and it wasn't a warm, supportive reaction.
- And she wasn't withyou for that diagnosis,
you were alone?
- No, I was alone in my unit. Yeah.
So I felt isolated and very lonely then,
and particularly when Ididn't get any support.
- That's sad, and I believeyou've got siblings?
(05:51):
How did they handle thenews of your diagnosis?
- Very well. It essentiallycaused us to come closer.
- Okay.
I've got two brothers and a sister,
and my next oldest brother,
we talk twice a week every week now,
and just to catch up, just to say hello,
(06:14):
and we never used to do that.
To get the lack of supportfrom the person I was with
at the time, and thenhave a different reaction
from my brothers and sister,
it was confusing, but thetime was confusing anyway,
because I didn't know whatwas going to happen to me,
and I didn't know whetherin 12-months' time
(06:35):
I was going to be notdriving, or whatever,
what my future held.
- Terrifying.- Yes.
You know, now it's differentbecause I know more,
but it was very confronting and confusing,
because I didn't have the knowledge.
I didn't really have any othersupport in the where I live,
(06:56):
and so, my only support wasmy siblings in another state,
and kind of, that helped me a lot,
the fact that they weresupportive because, you know,
I was very lonely and very scared,
and you know, at timeswas, like I said before,
you may not want to be here,but through their support
(07:17):
and their encouragement,that changed that.
- And so, your relationshipsort of broke down
from your diagnosis?
- Yes.
- How was the datingscene or what happened?
- Well, after that,after a period of time,
I was still wanting someone in my life,
and I tried the dating appsand that, and met a few people,
(07:41):
but I always feel I shouldbe upfront and honest.
I would not like to get in a relationship,
and then six months downthe track, kill that person.
So, I was always upfront and honest.
And I was pretty well ahundred percent every time,
they walked away.
- And so, that must havebeen so hard for you
to find the right personor even tackle that.
(08:01):
- It was difficult, but Istill felt I needed to stick
to my core values, and explain that
because it's a very importantpiece of information.
I mean we all know that youcan get into relationship,
and who knows what canhappen down the track,
but this was a pre-diagnosis,so I felt I really had
to be honest, and I got thestage where I just thought,
(08:24):
"Well, this is not going to work.
I'll just have to be contentthat I'll be on my own."
But I went to my GPand she said, you know,
"Find some social company,some sport perhaps,
try and start that way,
and to get yourself out of it,
and talk to more people,"which is not normally
(08:44):
what I do before diagnosis either.
So I said, "Right, I'llget on the internet,
and Google 'sport for over sixties',
and by chance, I cameacross walking football.
- Tell us a little bit about
what is walking football?How does it work?
- Well, in Australia, it'sprobably more appropriate
(09:05):
to call it walking soccer.
And it's just like a smallversion, safer version of
the running game of soccer.
Firstly, it's five or six people aside,
usually with goalkeepers,
and each side will havea different coloured bib,
and usually, it's a referee.
(09:26):
The whistle goes, kick off,it's walking so they can't run,
so they have to pass it,
opposition will walk up towards you,
try and stop you passing,
there's no tackling as such,
so they have to relyon you to make mistake,
or you pressuring them todo something with the ball.
(09:47):
So therefore, the technicalskill is then to know
where your other players are,and to pass the ball to them.
And people walk at different speeds.
But it can be very highly competitive
and it can be very social.
We have all parts of that game,
and the one that I playedis highly competitive.
(10:09):
We played against a young side
they'd be in their early twenties.
They played the running game,we challenged them to a game.
They thought, "Ha ha,we're going to smash these,
take the running out, takethe physical part out,
and we smashed them five-nil.
So it just proves what the game's like.
(10:33):
it levels the field for all abilities.
- So was it nerve wracking whenyou very first started this
walking football, and youwent to meet new people,
did you feel anxious becauseof your dementia diagnosis?
- I didn't tell themfor a while, you know.
(10:54):
I felt really good with walking football
because I felt accepted.
And particularly, asI became a goalkeeper,
and turns out to be a good one,
The best moment I ever hadon walking football field
was the day that someone gaveme the nickname "The Wall".
(11:18):
There was a day you playedfor an hour and a half,
I never let a goal in, no one got past me,
and the person that does ourFacebook and that thinking,
"Oh, what can I write?It's just like a wall."
And that's where it came from, "The Wall".
And I've never had anickname, not a positive one,
(11:42):
particularly growing up where I do,
and I just, "Wow, that's amazing.
I've got a nickname. That's awesome."
Which made me feel like I was somebody.
- Yeah. Which is what you want, you know,
particularly when you're new to the sport.
- Yeah, yeah. So I was like first picked,
(12:02):
as against like in school whenyou're last or never picked,
and that's really, really helped me a lot
to feel that belonging.
- Yeah.- And then, after a while,
once I got to know more people,
I went on the committee, andthen I told the committee,
and then it sort of went fromthere, told a few other people
(12:26):
and they all accepted it.
A lot of them come andask questions about it,
which I thought was great.
And most people said, "Oh, wewouldn't know you've had it."
- So, not only has walkingfootball brought new friendships
to your life, it's also brought love.
(12:48):
You met Kylie through thesport, so how did she react
when she found out about your diagnosis?
- Well, Kylie's a very specialperson, and she came back
and said, "Well, thediagnosis doesn't define you
as a person", and wantedto get to know me more,
which is just amazing.
- Tell me, what did that mean to you
(13:10):
for her to react in that way?
- Oh, that was so special.
That just made me feel so wonderful.
I thought, well maybe there'sa chance. Totally unexpected.
I was expecting the same
- Rejection.
- Rejection, and the fact thatKylie lived in another state,
(13:31):
would've made it veryeasy for her to do that.
- So you were originally in Brisbane,
and Kylie was in Adelaide.
So, in order to make thiswork, you have to think,
"Okay, somehow I've gotto get this, you know,
easier for us to be intouch with each other."
- We'd fly to Melbourne,or I'd fly to Adelaide,
or she'd fly to Brisbane,
and that's just not sustainable long term.
(13:53):
So, my lease was coming up, and I thought,
"Well, what do I do?Ah, bugger it." Sorry.
(both laugh)
- That's okay.- I'll move to Adelaide.
I can still do walking football there.
I can still do work withDementia Australia's advocacy.
I can do everything in Adelaidethat I can do in Brisbane.
(14:15):
- And now, you are based in Adelaide
and the friends that you'vegot there that you're starting
to get to know, the networkyou're starting to get to know,
how do they come across with the diagnosis
that you've talked to them about?
Or do they ask you questions?Are they interested?
Are they curious? What sortof reaction have you had?
- A lot of them don't know.- Really?
(14:35):
- At this stage.
There's a few that do.No one asks the question.
So, a lot of people don't know.
And that's fine for the moment.
- Yeah, I think it'sa tricky one isn't it?
I mean, part of you, in my own experience,
part of you doesn't reallywant to talk about it,
(14:56):
because you know, it's a bitof a downer to talk about it,
but then part of you sortof wants to acknowledge it.
It's a fine line isn't it,to sort of get it right.
- It is, and if peopleknow and they asked,
I am more than willingto talk and, you know,
educate them about what it's like.
- Yep.
(15:17):
- And to try and help them understand.
because they might haveother family relatives that
may get a diagnosis, orthey may get one themselves.
And that, to me, is educational,is to help them understand
but I only do that if they ask.
(15:42):
- Hi, my name's Dom. Mydad had vascular dementia.
His name is Noel O'Leary,and he was a plumber,
and a very warm, lovely personality.
He had a great sense of humour
and yeah, I was hisadvocate, carer, entertainer,
a looker-afterer, and daughter.
(all laugh)
- It sounds like you'rereally close to your dad.
(16:03):
- Yeah.
- Tell me about him.What kind of guy was he?
- Dad used to wear crisp, cotton shirts,
and there were alwayslike colourful patterns,
and he would always iron them beautifully,
and always be well presented.He was warm, funny.
He was pretty much everybody's friend.
He was very social and he loved fishing,
(16:25):
he loved telling a joke so we often read
from the dad joke book Ibrought up on visits to him.
He worked for himself his whole life,
so I found him so inspiring as a kid.
I ended up working for myself,just inspired by his ethics,
and you know, his working ethic,so he was my hero, my dad,
(16:48):
but he was also probably oneof my most favourite people
in the world.
- When you are that close to someone
and you see them receiving that diagnosis,
what's it like for you?
How did you take all of that?
- Obviously, grief and shock straight up.
(17:09):
I was already concernedthat might be the case,
that he may have dementia,
but I had to really quickly always be,
feel like I was neverlooking sad in front of him,
always in control and using humour
throughout his illness tomake him feel confident
(17:31):
that he was being cared for properly,
and to make him just not worry,
and not see that we'reall worried about him,
so it was that falsebravado that we put on.
I'd often put on the falseface, do a lot of laughing,
joking, confident stuff with him,
and then I'd have toleave the room sometimes
and have a bit of a cry. Yeah.
(17:52):
- Because it's quite hard forchildren, as well, to cope
with that, as I'm sureyou would find, Hamish,
with your dad and your siblings.
- Yeah, a hundred percent.
- It's a bit of a team effort, really,
of what's going to happen in the future.
- It's scary because you feellike you're making decisions
that are possibly quite consequential.
- There is definitely rolereversal and you notice that
(18:14):
as the first thing.
In the very first meeting,
when I took dad to thegeriatrician with mum,
and we heard the diagnosis,we had a test in the meeting,
and pretty much straightup, the geriatrician said,
"You have severe, moderatevascular dementia."
And afterwards, I talkedwith him after the meeting
(18:36):
and said, "How do you feel about this?
Have you been worried aboutyour cognitive thinking?
Have you been concerned?"
And he said, "Yes, yes I have."
And mom and I told himhe's not to worry anymore,
we are the ones that are going to take on
all his responsibilities in life.
He is just to enjoy himselfand we'll be his carers,
and make sure he lives a happy life.
(18:58):
- It's finding a fine line, isn't it,
to really just find the right balance.
- It is. Luckily, he had that sense of,
he loved ridiculous humour,
so I could hide behind that a little bit.
Whether it was like when I washelping him eat at lunchtime,
when he got quite bad,helping him eat food,
I would often like just breakout and play the spoons,
(19:20):
just do a random, andthat would make him laugh.
And then, then I knew Iwas connecting with him.
Sometimes, we'd playmusic, his favourite music
to enliven him if he wassleeping and not eating.
- What kind of music?
- He loved Phantom ofthe Opera, strangely,
so we would play that, youknow how it starts off...
(19:43):
Everyone else in the wing would be like,
"Oh my goodness, what is this music?
It sounds like a funeral."
(all laugh)
(Violin music plays)
- So Dom, tell me how did your mum react
to your dad's diagnosis?
- So, mum was devastated. of course.
(20:05):
Mum and dad have been together 56 years,
so they're a very, very loving couple.
Mum went into straight into grief.
She was grieving the wholetime Dad had dementia,
but she was amazing.
She managed to be braveand very loving for dad,
and she did some incredible things
that I'm really proud of watching her do.
(20:26):
She helped dad keep his sense of self.
When dad had to go into aged care,
because she was caring for him at home,
and when it became too dangerousfor him to stay at home
because he was having falls, she made sure
that he kept his senseof self by taking all
of his shirts home everyafternoon, and laundering
(20:47):
and ironing them exactlyhow dad would've done,
because he was a crazy ironer,
and if the laundry tookany of dad's shirts,
she would make a beelinedown to the laundry
in the aged care home andsteal the shirts back,
so they just looked perfect for dad,
and he was probably theonly man in aged care
that wasn't in his pyjamas,
but she really helped himretain his sense of self.
(21:10):
- That's amazing. That'sso important as you say,
to help keep that personclose to being who they were.
- Exactly. - And how aboutyour dad after the diagnosis?
Did he do things aswell that you recollect,
maybe protected you guys a little?
- I was the one to have
to tell dad he was going into aged care,
(21:30):
and I still have a lot ofgrief thinking about it.
It was one of the hardestthings I've ever done,
but dad made it much easier for mum and I,
we had taken him outto coffee that morning,
and I had driven himto the aged care home,
and I told him in the carthat he was having to go
just away for a few weekswhile mum needed a lot of rest
(21:53):
because she was very tired.
And I said to him, "Do you understand?"
And he said, "Yes, yes I do."
And I started getting a bitteary, and he could see that,
and I said, "Thanks for understanding.
You're amazing, aren't you?"And he said, "Yes, yes I am."
And I said, "and you're reallyhumble too, aren't you?"
(all laugh)
And he said, "Yes, yes I am."
(22:15):
- So, everyone's turning upwith this kind of fake bravado
trying to make everyone else feel better.
- Yeah. Yeah.
And these are the moments when you,
I mean talking about false bravado,
suddenly you don't care anymore.
You are just there makingpeople happy, and yourself,
because it's somethingyou can hide behind,
(22:36):
laughter and humour, and it'simportant as well just to...
- you've got to hold onto it, haven't you?
- You do.- So how do you feel, Jim,
about your kids adapting?
I mean, you've talked to mein the past about the changing
dynamics with your husband, Tyler,
but I'm just kind of wonderingabout the kids as well?
- I think with my kidsand my kids' partners,
(22:58):
I try and be jovial, chat,
and enjoy a beer with the boys,
and don't really want togo down that road too much.
And they, I think theyrespect that in me as well,
because they, I think theyavoid saying, "How are you?"
You know, and we talk abouteverything and anything but that
- This is the false bravadothat you were talking about.
(23:19):
- Yeah. And I think it's really important,
it's living a day at a time,
and celebrating the moment you're in now,
which I think is reallyimportant with dementia,
living in the moment you're in, and not,
I think that's whereanticipatory grief comes in
when you start worryingabout what's going to happen.
- So Dom, you did lotsof things to try and keep
your father-daughterrelationship alive, I guess,
(23:44):
while he was deteriorating.
- Yes.
- How did you make that distinction,
and how did you help foster that?
- I made tools.
I knew I would have baddays when he had a bad day,
and I would be, how am I goingto keep up this happy front?
You can't do it all the time.
So I thought, I'll make a book for dad.
(24:04):
So I started with a ring binder folder,
I started with a few little stories
about dad when he was young,some photos of him growing up.
I reached out to his siblings and said,
"Do you mind like sharing somestories about," funny stories
because he always hadfunny stories in his life
about growing up together,
and they wrote like two pages of stories,
(24:25):
put them in the book.
I started writing stories on our travel,
we had some funny things happen
when we were travelling overseas together.
I put pictures with every story,
and each time I visited, Iwould bring him up a new story.
And I thought, this is a greatway to give him something
to look forward to. I would say,
"there's going to be anotherstory next week, just wait."
(24:46):
And it also helped me if I washaving a particularly sad day
and I didn't feel it, likeI could really cheer him up,
or I thought I can go to that book
and just start reading from it,
and it's got the funny stories in it,
so it was like a good backup plan for me,
and I thought it would bereally helpful during Covid,
when nurses...
(25:07):
- To know about him, justlook into his life a little.
- Yeah, they could read to him about it,
- That's fantastic.
- And visitors, I often notice,
not just with our relatives or friends,
but dad had a good friendas well that would visit,
and he did say to us, "I'mso nervous, I don't know",
because dad was non-verbalmost of the time,
"I don't know how totalk to Noel anymore."
(25:28):
So I thought, this is agreat go-to for him as well.
He can just either point at the pictures
or read some stories.
Yeah, but I didn't noticejust in the home, in general,
people being scared, notknowing how to engage
with people with dementia.
- Yeah.
- So it was a great toolkit for, yeah.
- Well, that can be very conconfusing for people, right?
(25:48):
Because they're used to, like, I get calls
all the time now from familyor dad's friends saying,
"I can't really, like yourdad's not answering the phone,
he's not replying to emails."
I call him, and I can barelyhear him, and that's true,
he's just losing all of that function.
- Yeah, yeah.
But I don't really know what the,
I don't know what the solution is.
So I end up going to visit him.
(26:10):
We go through all his emailsand his messages, and we reply
or do stuff, and then as I'mleaving, I'll call back one
of the friends, put it onthe loudest speaker phone
and put it on dad's chestand say, "Off you go."
- That's great. - I don't knowif it's a very good solution.
And Jim, have you noticedany of your friends
reacting in different or interesting ways
(26:30):
when they learn about your diagnosis?
- Yeah, as you said earlier,
everybody's different the way they react.
Some of my friends are super positive
and really look for,will I do that, you know,
I'm forgetful, and stuff like that.
But some of my friendsdon't really mention it
or discuss it, and I thinkthey get the vibe from me
that let's just be positive and carry on.
(26:50):
But a couple of my close friend,
really close friends have been to
awareness about dementia,and really invested
and read upon it, you know,
and spent a lot of time finding out stuff.
But some of my mates justare very jovial about it,
and don't really want to deal with it.
- The ones that have investedin figuring things out
(27:13):
about it, and learning, andtaking courses or whatever,
what's that meant to you?
- A Lot. Yeah, it's meant a lot,
because Caroline and Nat,who, you know, went on holiday
with Ty and I recently, they both went
and did a course and learnt about it,
but they're very in touchwith a lot of stuff,
and they're very understanding,and I feel very relaxed
(27:34):
because I don't have to putany bravado on, which is
exactly what you're chattingabout earlier, with them.
If they say or do thewrong thing, you say,
"Go back to the course."
(All laugh)
- Do some homework.
- I don't, but I should.
- I think the most importantthing I'd tell anybody
(27:54):
that says you know, you dohear this often, people say,
"What's the point of visitingpeople in an aged care home,
because they're oftenasleep or they're not,
they've got dementia, you know,
they're not going to engage with us."
I think an important thingis trying to reach in
to your loved ones withdementia by using tools,
by reading them stories fromtheir past, by playing games,
(28:17):
even if it's, or colouring in,
just enjoyable things you can do together,
and I think when people saythere's no quality of life
for someone, even with advanceddementia, I really disagree
because to me, I thinkquality of life is reaching in
and connecting with someone you love.
(28:47):
- If you're strugglingwith how your friendships
and family relationships havechanged since your diagnosis,
or if you are the friend whojust isn't quite sure what
to say, you can call theNational Dementia Helpline
and talk to an advisor like Kristin.
They're here to help.
- After a diagnosis of dementia,
(29:08):
you might feel like so manythings are going to change,
and one of the ones youmight be really worried about
is the changes in yourrelationship with your partner.
If you're worried about
how your relationship's going to change,
or maybe you've alreadynoticed that it has
and you want to talkto somebody about that,
Dementia Australia offerssupport on the helpline,
(29:30):
or with counselling, sothat you and your partner
can talk about how you're both feeling,
and talk about waysthat you can make things
a little better,
maybe even a little fun as you go.
It can be really difficultwhen you find out
that you've got a diagnosis of dementia,
and you really want to reach out
(29:52):
to the people that you love,your friends and family,
but it feels like they're pulling away.
I've spoken to a number offriends who call the helpline
because they don't know what to say,
and often, I'll ask them,
"What do you usually talkto the person about?"
And you know, maybe it'sfooty or maybe it's flowers,
(30:13):
or maybe it's a jokethat you've always had,
and I encourage them to just start there.
One thing that might makeit easier for your friends
is to let them know howthey can be with you,
how they can make thefriendship work easier.
So maybe at golf, it's hardfor you to write the score,
(30:36):
your friend can do that for you,
and you can let them know that.
And when you're making new friends,
you don't have to tell themright away, "I have dementia."
It's okay to talk to them
about anything elseyou'd want to talk about.
Eventually, it might comeup just like anything else
would in conversation.
(30:59):
If you want to talk more
about anything you'veheard on this episode,
like navigating new territoryin your relationships,
you can contact the NationalDementia Helpline on
1800 100 500.
We're available 24-hours aday, every day of the year.
Give us a call.
(31:29):
- Hold the Moment is a podcastfrom Dementia Australia.
It's produced by Deadset Studios.
You can find more episodes and resources
through the Dementia Australiawebsite, dementia.org au.
And don't forget to follow Hold the Moment
in your podcast app, soyou don't miss an episode.
The show is hosted by me, Jim Rogers,
(31:49):
- And by me, Hamish MacDonald,
The executive producers areKelly Ridden and Grace Pashley.
The producer is Liam Ridden,sound design by Sean Holden.
A special thanks to the wholeteam at Dementia Australia,
and to all the advocates
who shared their stories on this podcast.
- If you are enjoying Hold the Moment,
you can leave us a review or rate us
(32:09):
in whatever podcast app youare listening to right now.
It really does help otherpeople struggling with dementia
find the show, and we'dlove to hear from you.
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