Behind the Mic: The Realities of Stand-Up Comedy, Mental Health & Life on Tour With Marc-Anthony Sinagoga

In this episode of Recovering Out Loud, we talk with Marc-Anthony Sinagoga, a stand-up comedian with over 14 years on stage. Marc-Anthony shares what it’s like to write jokes, bomb on stage, and perform in wild venues — including some unexpected gigs at sex clubs. We also explore the mental health challenges of constant travel, the impact of fatherhood, and the realities of working solo in comedy. This episode is a raw and funny look behind the scenes of comedy life, with insights for anyone navigating creativity, recovery, and personal growth.

Go find him at

https://www.marcanth.com/

 @notmarcanthony 

https://www.instagram.com/notmarcanthony/

Episode Transcript

(00:06):
And we're back live with recovering out loud.

(00:29):
Fuck, you're busy, eh? What do you mean?
Like I've looked at. So I opened my phone and I see
your beautiful face. By the way, I love your espresso
videos. They're.
Oh, thank you. They fucking crack me up.
Appreciate that makes me use with my charm, yeah.
Makes me have more espresso though, so fuck you for that,
no? That's no it's so good you can
never have enough. I agree.
I agree. But so I opened up my phone this

(00:51):
morning, I saw your beautiful face.
And you were in Montreal last night.
Yeah, in front of a sold out crowd.
A week before that, you were in Disneyland.
Yeah, Disney World. Sorry.
What's the difference again? Orlando, LA.
That's a pretty big difference. It's a huge difference.
Yeah, I'm like pretending it's. Not in terms of the heat.

(01:11):
It's the worst, yeah. Yeah, I saw your beautiful face
sweating. Oh my God, dude.
Jesus. OK, that's better.
Sorry. I don't like hearing my voice
too loud. Yeah, I saw your beautiful face.
And so you're a busy guy. I, you know, I asked you to do
this. And we had this booked for a
while. And I was like, I'm going to be
honest. I was like, man, he looks.
I wouldn't even be mad if he said no.
So I appreciate it. And thanks so much for coming

(01:33):
on. Of course, man, anytime.
So I. Appreciate the the praise.
The busier the better, dude. Or else I fucking start eating
more than what I do. You know?
You get too, you know, then you just like things slow down too
much and then you feel like you gotta work even harder to get it
going. You know what I mean?
Yeah. Yeah.
And then I feel like for for me.So I'm newly getting into this.

(01:56):
I hate this word but like creator space I will never use
the word influencer because thatword drives me nuts and I hope
I'm not influencing anybody in this world.
Do not live like me. You do, though.
It's crazy, yeah. Yeah, I mean, like, yeah.
And I, I always hope that somebody watches something that
I put out one day. And it was like, huh, I never

(02:17):
thought about it like that. Because that's what social media
does for me when I'm like, I'm gonna try that in my life today.
And specifically with addiction and mental health.
I I came in here, I had to be, came into recovery.
I mean, like I had to be willingbecause my life was such a shit
show that I was just wrong on somany things.
So it's like OK, I need answers now.
Yeah, and that's the problem where like so many people, just

(02:37):
the term influencer, it's like this is the world we live in,
dude. Like everyone's on their phones.
Everyone's trying to make someone buy something or make
someone do something, in my case, laugh or whatever, and
guide them somewhere, you know, mine's ticket sales, see me
live, whatever. O it's kind of justice.
Like, you know what people, I feel like people get just
jealous when they do that. Yeah.
And they're just like, bro, you're an influencer.
You're a fucking loser. Yeah.

(02:58):
It's like, well, it's a living for me now.
Like, what do you, you know whatI mean?
Like, what do you want me to do?Not succeed?
Is that the plan? Yeah, You know what I mean?
Yeah. Well, no.
Well, for you, it's different, bro.
Like, you know what I mean? Like you have to because it's
part of your thing. But like, fuck, I could never
fuck that. I could never do it.
And then you start talking to them and you're like, yeah, you
could totally. Do you think so, man?
You think I could do that? You know, that'd be fucking
sick. And you're like, yeah, OK.

(03:19):
You just don't want to do it, that's all.
Yeah. Or you don't like seeing people,
right? That's the other thing I'm
really, really realizing. I heard a podcast yesterday
where someone was like Alex fromMosey, Of course.
Yeah, he's he's great. He was talking about how here.
You go, Alex, from Rosie. Let's go.
Yeah, let me get my thighs out for her, Mosey.
You need to, he's like, you needto have people in your life that

(03:39):
have that have bigger dreams foryou than you do, right.
And it's true. Like the people I surround
myself with today are like, oh, yeah, you could do that.
Yeah, do it. Like you could grow the podcast.
Why not? Why not you?
Why not you? You could be fucking Joe Rogan.
Why not? You know, why not?
And. You know what, dude, there's so
many people being Italian like us.
We, there's so much in our culture that's very limiting in

(04:01):
terms of being successful. There is a lot of Italians that
are like, well, no, you can't be, you can't be Joe Rogan.
Like that's crazy. Like, you know what I mean?
Or like, you know you what? You're gonna charge that much
money for this? Like, that's ridiculous.
Like that. That's way too much.
And what are you thinking? But then you hang out with other
people who are in the space and know the game and they're like,

(04:23):
buddy, you should be charging 10times the one that you're
charging, you know what I mean? And then you go back and say
that to like, let's say your dador your mom or fuck, God forbid.
You're not. No, they're like, are you out of
your mind, dude? Like that's insane.
No one's going to buy that. No, like, they just don't.
You can't talk to people who don't get it, you know what I
mean? You just don't get what you're
doing. No, it's a good point.
And so you're a stand up comic, you How long you been doing it?

(04:45):
For 12, My entire life. Legit since I was like 20 so 34
so. 13 years. 14 years dude, I was saying this to my wife this
morning and I truly mean this what I'm about to say.
I'm not just blowing smoke up your ass.
Come on, blow me. Let's go bring it.
Bring my smoke, yeah. We we went to elementary school
together, yes. And you were the kind of guy

(05:08):
that everybody would kind of a hint and myself especially, like
you still make me laugh today, but you made us all laugh back
then. And it was one of those like,
man, that guy should be Mark, should be a stand up comedian
one day. That's wild.
I don't remember anybody saying that at all.
We were all thinking it. Yeah, that's.
Insane. Yeah.
I mean, I was the funnier personin class and going to the office

(05:29):
for it, so. Was there?
Yeah. I know there was that I had a
lot. Of that too, but I don't have.
I remember seeing you in there I.
Don't have anything to show for it though.
Hey, how's it going? Good to see you buddy.
Same thing. Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, we give props in the office.
Yeah, Mom brings us lunch. Back to the fucking.
Back at it. Yeah, exactly.
How did you get into comedy? When did you know this?
Was there a moment that you're like, I'm going to be a fucking

(05:50):
comedian? Yeah, I mean, I went to that
Humber program, did that. So that's clown college
basically, Humber. Comedy.
Yeah, exactly. They give you a nose and
everything. For real, though, they give you
a nose and everything. But that was sort of like, OK,
let me try and take comedy seriously.
And I didn't really know what todo with that.

(06:12):
Like the goal was like, yeah, I wanted to be Mike Myers, Jim
Care, like those guys. And I was like, OK, what did
they do? They went to Second City.
They went to something and developed this skill.
So found Humber audition got in there.
But once I did stand up was never like, dude, doing speeches
in school was like hell, like, oh fuck, I would like be sick.

(06:33):
Everything. They're like, Mark, you're
tomorrow. I'm like, I won't be here.
I can guarantee you. So that was brutal for me.
But when I did stand up for the first time, that was like the
big defining, reassuring moment where I was like, OK, I'm going
to be doing this forever. I feel like I'm in the right
place. I feel like this is what I'm
supposed to be doing. And then just went 100% and that
was nice. That's been it.
Never. Looked back, what about it

(06:54):
excites you? Why do What about it makes you
happy? It's very much a solo game, so
like, there's no one else to blame but yourself.
Do you know what I mean? Like both ways, it goes both
ways. So it's kind of like if a joke
didn't work or you know, like it's just you and your thoughts.
So like, if the joke doesn't work, there's a billion reasons

(07:16):
why every decision you made while you were before and while
on stage effects what you're going to do next and affects the
outcome. And there's no like you can't
really stand on anybody else. You can't be like, Oh well,
fucking buddy showed up like a fucking like it's because of
you, bro. Like you can't blame anybody
else, you know? And there's like, it's very much

(07:37):
like working out. I'll relate that to you, not me,
but like the work you put into it is the results you're going
to get out of it and the consistency of it.
So that's the only thing I've ever done where I've given that
type of commitment to and that kind of thing.
So. And seeing the results.
And seeing the results and also like, you know, you see the
growth, these are your chops getbetter.
Like you know what I mean? You you're navigating it on your

(07:57):
own. There's no, there's no one in
charge of it. There's no rules.
There's no journey to like. There's a journey, but like
every, each person's different. There's no way of doing.
It there's no template there. You go yeah, no template and no
right or wrong way. So it's very much like yeah well
I do this because this works forme when I do it, you know what I
mean? I don't do 1 liners because I

(08:18):
can't fucking write them and when I do them they don't work
or I fucking hate it. Like, I just don't write that
way and it doesn't work out thatway, and that's that.
So you're gonna have a differentpath than I will, even if we're
both storyteller comics, you know what I mean?
Yeah, that is cool. It's like you can kind of mold
this whole, you know, you're kind of like making a movie,
honestly, every single time you go on stage and you're

(08:38):
presenting it and you're like, this could either flop or land
and you kind of learn from it every single time.
The really cool part about it islike being in the pocket.
Like what excites me about it the most is when you're on stage
and like I'm saying something tothe audience, but my brain is
thinking about something else. Most of the time when you're

(08:59):
crushing and you're actually like, that's when you're in it
the most and there is no, you'renot thinking about anything
after whatever. It's only when you start to
tank, you're like, OK, this didn't work.
This usually works right here and it didn't work right here.
Now I'm starting to lose them. The next joke that I'm going to
say is very similar to this one,so I should probably move that
later and put something else here.

(09:19):
Do you know what I mean? So you're doing that in your
head to guide the rest of the show.
Do you know what I mean? So like that part is, let's call
it exhilarating because like it's fun and it's nerve wracking
at the same time, you know what I mean?
So. I've I've always wondered this
and I hear, I hear a lot of comics say this.
I listen to a lot of podcasts, but I hear a lot of comics say,

(09:40):
you know, and you just said it there when the audience doesn't
like it or when it starts to turn.
How the fuck do you know when, when it starts to turn?
Because like, to me, I don't know the difference when I'm, I,
I go to watch a lot of stand up when I travel, especially every
time I go to Lai always try to go to comedy.
No New York Comedy Cellar. And I, I'm like, I don't, you
know, the guy starts talking about bombing on stage.

(10:01):
He's like, oh, this isn't going so well.
And I'm like, look, I'm like, I didn't really feel that.
How do you know? Oh dude, like when OK, you know
when you're watching someone andit really is bad.
Yeah, yeah. Like, really?
Bad and they can't tell the the comic yeah thinks he's crushing
or isn't changing. The way he's acting at all.
Yeah, and all of you are like getting real uncomfortable.
That's that moment when you can feel and you start looking at

(10:23):
other people and they know when you know that sort of, let's
call it fuck. Brutal word here, but that
energy in the room and like you guys all feeling a certain way,
we can all feel that in any roomwe go to with any scenario.
So he 90% of the time, like a lot of comics try to just blow
through it and not address it because addressing it is like,

(10:43):
like when I address it, it has to be going very badly.
And when it is, I'm like, I haveto address this.
Like I've tried everything at this point and now it's so bad.
It's like the elephant in the room.
Yeah, exactly. And you have to address it, or
at least you're trained to. But we are our worst critics.
So there is a problem with addressing it because sometimes,
a lot of the times anyways, theydon't know how it's supposed to

(11:05):
go. So yeah, sure, maybe at this
line, you know, because you've done this joke 1000 times, you
know that it's going to get a big pop here.
So if it doesn't get a huge pop that you're used to, but it gets
like a laugh that's just not as big, and you go, oh, this isn't
going well. It doesn't mean it's not going
well. You're just used to it
murdering, right? And it's not in this moment, you
know? But a lot of times they still

(11:26):
are paying attention and like, are still, you know, locked in,
you know. Yeah, that's wicked.
What's your creative process like writing?
How do you write? How do you get inspired?
It's brutal. I bet you had changes too over
time. Well, yeah, like it's never the
same per joke, you know, for a lot of the times, like for
example, I have a joke that I have about dinosaurs, about my

(11:47):
wife not believing in dinosaurs,which is a true story.
And the way I wrote that was we got into an argument live in
person, right? All arguments are live in
person, Mark. Fuck.
We got into an. Argument.
I thought you were on stage for a second.
With her, no, we got into an argument and then I had a show
the next day and I just said theargument back and forth like

(12:10):
what we actually said. I said it on stage and they
crushed. And I was like, OK, so then I
never wrote it. I just kept, every time I went
on stage, I was like, let me tell that story about me and my
wife arguing about dinosaurs. And then it started to hone
itself as you work it on stage. And then after, you know, you

(12:31):
start to remember the parts thatwork and don't work.
And then it starts to shape itself into a joke or into a
full story bit where it's like, you know, then from there you
kind of you draft that out and be like, OK, these are the main
points that work. And then you try and build it
and like punch it up or try to find alternatives for certain
parts or whatever. That's really cool.
I've. Never heard that.
The other side is like, you know, I have a joke about food

(12:55):
basics where like the whole thing was I wrote the whole
thing out and then went to go and perform it and then you go
back and you just keep editing it as you go. 90% of the time my
stuff is based on something thathas happened.
I go on stage, I tell it and then it, I tweak it as it goes.
You find new tags on stage, you know, you write new tags for it.

(13:16):
You know, this part is funny, but this line didn't work, so I
got to change this part and thenyou change it to something that
works. So look, a lot of family come
and see me and they go, Oh well fuck, I remember when Nona did
that, but this part never happened.
It's like, well, the real part doesn't fucking work.
So you know what I mean? Like some parts you have to add
some salt and pepper, you have some seasoning and stuff.
So, but like, it all comes from like a premise that has happened

(13:38):
at some point, you know? So we talked about bombing a
little bit. Tony Monaco, did you get any of
the live luxy nightclub I'm. Going to clip that.
Do it. Didn't Joe Rogan get his podcast
thing from some UFC fighter likeyelling it on stage?
I I learned that the other day, some UFC fighter in an interview

(13:59):
said Joe Rogan I got or whateverhe said and he clipped it from
that interview after the fight. I know I didn't even know that.
Either I. Didn't know that either.
Yeah. So I wanted to ask you.
This is a sensitive topic, but have you ever bombed before?
No. It's not sensitive at all.
Yeah, so bombing is a part of the process, much like relapsing

(14:21):
in. I just made that up right now.
But how on earth does one recover from bombing, even
either in the moment? Does it stay in your head for a
while after? How do you get over it?
I mean, I feel like you get a little better with it over time.
Like the bombs stick out less and less now.

(14:42):
It's almost like jokes bomb themselves rather than whole
performances at this point in the game for me anyways.
I mean, that's not true. There's I've had sets this year
where it's like from start to finish, it's like complete
silence. And I'm like, I don't know
what's going on here. And these are people who paid to
see me. Like on my tour I had one show,
dude was like silence the entirehour and a half opener and me

(15:06):
and I was like, but then the meet and greet line is 100
people deep. They're all taking photos.
They're all like, this was incredible.
I'm like, I'm like, were we in the same?
Room. Yeah.
Like, was there a sound barrier?Yeah.
Dude, and I literally, I watchedthe footage and I was like, no,
there's no laughs like at all. I and I don't know what I I
honestly have no idea what happened.

(15:26):
But yeah, man, it's like you sweat more, you hate it, you
hate yourself, you hate your bits, you blame your own
preparation, you know, because there is a such thing as over
preparing and stuff. But like, what is that?
How does that like, you don't know until it's all over and you
go fuck. I was too worried about
memorizing this part because youknow, like sometimes, for

(15:49):
example, in a set list, you'll Ihave this whole part about going
to Italy and like the different things that I'm grateful for in
Canada when I go to Italy, I'm not really Italian.
When I'm here, I feel like I'm the most.
Italian. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's good. Yeah, But I finally found like a
structure for it that works. So I really wanted to remember
the structure because the, you know, it works so smoothly,

(16:12):
right? And transitioned into my other
stuff. So I was like, so focused on
remembering that. But then when I went out there,
I wasn't really in the moment and connecting with the audience
for the first minute or two thatlike I was focused on hitting
those points that I was just like a fucking, you know, you're
not in the bit. You're just like, what do you
call it? Like in robot mode, you're just
saying, yeah, you're just reciting the bit, which never

(16:35):
works. And then you're like, well,
fuck, man, you can't. That's over rehearsing.
That's being over stressed out and fucking, you know, worried
about bullshit. I'm not finding the words in my
brain for the things I'm trying to describe on this entire
podcast. It's hot.
In here and it's it's very fucking hot here that's how I
bomb when I bomb dude you want to see me sweat bro yeah come

(16:56):
watch me bomb dude that's fucking my low back that's.
I'll be the guy standing up and cheering.
No, you won't. You'd be sweating too.
You'd be like this is a mess. Yeah, well, there's such a thing
as second hand embarrassment, right?
And like people, you know, I wasalways told whenever I gave a
public speech in certain areas, people are like, no one wants
you to do bad. Nobody.
It's kind of true in comedy too,right?

(17:16):
Dude, nothing, I can't watch comedy like I never watch the
people before me because if I watch someone who's eating it,
it fucks me up. Like I I get out of my head
space like, and I know I like a lot of times you should watch,
you know, because if someone's going to do crowd work, you want
to make sure that you either, you know, there's a birthday in
a room, you know that this guy'scelebrating.
So you don't want to be like, Hey, buddy, what do you

(17:36):
celebrate? And the whole room.
We just told you, yeah. Exactly right.
There's that type of thing. But when someone starts to bomb
dude, I get the fuck out of thatroom immediately.
I'm like I can't be a part of this, this is brutal cuz you're
just you. Like you soak in the energy a
little bit and it fucking. I don't know.
But that's why I try and do likebreath work before shows to get
out of my head and shit too. You know some Wim Hof.

(17:59):
Yeah, yeah, I mean, yeah, that'sthat's becoming a lot more
prevalent now and, and mainstream is this kind of
meditation breath work. Yeah, I try to do it every
morning and it wavers. But yeah, before you do any
public speaking, it's funny you bring up Second City because I
did a public speaking course there and I really enjoyed it.
I had a good time and a lot of what she was talking about, it
was a good experience. I feel like my public speaking

(18:24):
has gotten a little bit better, but I don't know.
Have you ever gone up? Because this, this has happened
to me before. I've had to lead some, you know,
in recovery. We have to share our story once
in a while. And I've been up like, you know,
probably I could say probably 3 or 4 times in front of like I've
been up a lot, but I've been up three or four times in the seven
or eight years in front of like 200 people.

(18:46):
And for me that was, that was a lot.
You know, you have a podium, youhave a microphone, everyone's
looking at you. No one wants to do bad.
What? Is that fucking podium dude?
Yeah. Well, you don't like well
because you, but you guys like to move back and forth, right
like. We don't like to necessarily.
Work the but you have to engage everybody.
Yeah, but like, you don't like just the podium is blocking 90%

(19:08):
of your body, Yeah. And body and we communicate what
90% yeah yeah of like through. Like next time just pull the mic
out and walk around. No, I'm serious.
That would literally engage everybody.
Oh, 100. Percent.
If you went up there and been like fucked this podium shit and
pulled the mic out and just and walked in front and just stood

(19:28):
in front of it and stood at the front of the tip of the stage
automatically, dude, you'll do 20 times better just from that.
Yeah, I know you've got the notes and stuff like that.
No, no, there's no notes. You just oh fuck dude, then get
rid of that thing. Because you're telling your
story, so it's like I I'm the only one that knows it.
So yeah, I can say whatever I want.
Yeah, you just have to be careful when you're talking when

(19:49):
and you're holding the mic, you're not doing this.
Yeah, sometimes you're like, so so then I was talking.
You know what I mean? You.
Oh, because then. Oh, yeah.
Then no one can. And everyone here.
Exactly. Yeah.
Yeah. So you, you know, you talk about
bombing. Is there What?
What's the weirdest place you'veever done a gig at?
At. There's quite a few weird how I.

(20:10):
Don't know, just like strange. I mean, the the one where you
just literally told me about thepeople not laughing like that
would be that's, that's like a Twilight Zone moment.
I mean I've done some at like sex clubs where people are
getting like their Dick sucked in the front room.
Really. You ever just bomb and buddies
getting this Dick sucked? No.
I can't say. Yeah, that's brutal.
Is anyone paying attention? Everyone's paying attention and

(20:33):
everyone's naked and everyone's got a boner.
Dude, I was dude, I was performing.
Dude. This is the crazy 'cause it's
like I feel this way about sex in general.
Not like everybody. If you see two people fucking
right there, we're both looking.Everyone is like, I can't you
see animals fucking like. Yeah, you can't look away.

(20:54):
You can't look away. So when you're performing and
there's like, you know, 200 people in there, they're all
naked or summer in robes and they're like feeling each other.
And this is like the preamble totheir night.
It's like you can't not see what's going on and not look.
So this one guy sitting in the front row waiting for his date,

(21:15):
cock ring on dude. Full fledger.
Like, just so like a rock. Ready to go?
Like just sitting there like this was he making front row
just like watching my stand up cock ring on looking at me like
into the bits and I'm I can't stop looking at his fucking is

(21:36):
solid Dong and I'm like looking around.
I'm like, OK, brother, like I can't do this.
Like you have to like this is you're like either start jerking
off, which is really weird, but it's par for the course you.
Know at least you're doing something.
Do something with this or or take a walk, like you know what
I mean? And he's just like, I'm just
waiting for my my plus one. I'm like, they're not coming.
Like, I don't like we're an hourinto the show here.

(21:59):
Like they're not here. Or like, you know, can you just
not be solid? Yeah, I call the doctor.
It's been a while. It's been a long time.
You have had a boner that's fulltilt for this long.
It's unbelievable. It's very weird.
Like, and that was like, I addressed it.
I said all this to him. He started laughing and then he
got up. He's like, would you feel better
if I like got up and left? I'm like, I want you to enjoy

(22:20):
the show, but like, like do whatever you want, but I just
want you to know that this is fucking me up.
I'm like then I go to the bar dude and he comes to me and
still full tilt boner butt nakedand he's like, man, that was
really funny. Sorry if I like interrupted you.
He orders a drink. I'm like, oh don't worry about
it. Orders a drink dude.
As he turns to walk away, his Dick.

(22:41):
Just. Just hits my leg.
I'm like I'm done dude. Get me the fuck out of here man.
His boner just fucking gets caught on my leg.
Like how? Does that gig come about?
Dude, there's like there's all these sex club have all the they
have like, you know, themed nights and they have like big
entertainment rooms where like shrimp dancing, burlesque,
whatever, right? Like, but yeah, it gets, you

(23:02):
know, then at a certain time, like after the show, like 11:00
PM, you either have to get in a robe and get naked to stay in
there or you got to go. So I always go obviously, you
know, but like I, it was funny. I forgot my bag in one time.
So I, I went back, I forgot likeI had like a little fucking side
satchel bag or whatever, crossbody Fanny pack and I left

(23:25):
it side stage. And like now, the stage at this
point was like an apparatus where you strap people to it and
whip them and shit. There's a different kind of show
going on after. You, yeah, there was like a, you
know, feel free to use the stageand whip your pal.
And that's what it was, dude. Like, I come back to get my bag
and, like, picture just like your standard, like anybody in

(23:47):
your brain, Like, they look likea bunch of school teachers, just
like getting whipped and, you know, doing everything you can
think of. And I just could not believe
what people were doing in there blowing me away.
Wow. People are into some crazy
stuff. Wow.
And they were like, you're just not tapped into your sexual
side. I'm like, yeah, for sure, dude.
Yeah, Sorry, I didn't want to get pegged tonight.

(24:08):
Yeah, that wasn't in my bingo card for today.
You know what I mean? Like.
Come on. And I don't think my wife and
child would appreciate. It Yeah, I don't think my wife
wants me here at all, to be honest.
If I wasn't getting paid, I would not be here.
You know what I mean? So it's crazy the gigs that you
end up doing. Man, I mean, so mental health is
a big part of stand up, obviously.

(24:29):
Yeah, so I so I hear, man. Yeah, there's, you know,
there's, there's a stigma in mental, in comedy.
You know, you've seen, we were talking about before the show,
you've seen a couple of people who are now in recovery, which
is good. That kind of, we're going
through it in in the throes of addiction and alcoholism and
you, you, it's kind of a thing, right?
Like you. Hear A.
Lot of people going through it, but how does I guess, how does

(24:52):
like mental health, how do you deal with your mental health and
around comedy, traveling, you know, being on the road a lot,
being away from your family, What's that like?
I I swear to do, the short answer is I eat, I swear to God.
Like I not to make a joke about it, but like everybody deals
with so many things and everyonehad like, and certain things
affect people differently. And what fucks me up more than

(25:16):
anything is being on the road for long periods of time.
Like, you know, you find your threshold.
Like sometimes you book a bunch of stuff and you're like, oh,
this is great. I've got like 2 months ready to
go. And then you're like at like a
month thing. Like buddy, I can't do this.
Like I got to go back. Like you, you're just like,
you've been on 22 different beds, you've been in 10
different hotels. Like you know what I mean?

(25:36):
Like it just it wear and tear onyour body alone, the flying a
bunch, you can get sick way easier.
And like the last two I did, I got like I got bronchitis, I got
walking pneumonia, I got strep throat, I fucking had a fever.
Like you know what I mean? You're like, this isn't a 2
month span because you're sleeping like shit.
You're on to the next, you're onto the next and you think you

(25:57):
can do it. I noticed earlier on ANYWAYS
that my threshold was about like3 weeks.
I was like OK, after three weeksI'm like almost sick of it, you
know what I mean? You're like, OK, mentally and
physically I'm drained and I need a reset.
I got to go back home. I got to eat my own food that I
make. And you know what I mean?
Because like you're eating late after a show, you sleep in maybe

(26:20):
you go to the gym, you're on a plane, you go to the next spot,
you're eating on the road, you're eating in a car.
Like especially in Canada, it's like it's really long drives
where you're, you know, you'll wake up in Edmonton, you'll do a
show, wake up the next morning and you're driving 8 hours to
fucking wherever you do the showthat night, you sleep the next
day, you're driving 4 hours somewhere else.
Like when you do that for even aweek, you're like, OK, you know,

(26:44):
fuck, we got a slot of gig in here where we're here for three
days or something. You know what I mean?
To really break it up and the wear and tear can get a lot,
which keeps you it keeps you busy, but it also you lose a
little bit of like, I don't wantto say reality because you're
not really in touch with what's going on in your personal life
in like mainstream life. You're just like, I'm going to

(27:05):
this town to entertain these people with the stuff that I
think works. You're working on some bits,
you're crafting an hour, whatever.
But the having a kid is like wayworse.
Dude. You're like, you go home.
Like I was in Montreal for the weekend, dude, was it gone four
days? I come home, I'm like my
daughter is taller. She looks like I'm like, what

(27:25):
the fuck? Like you just feel like you
missed out on like a growth period, right?
And like because you're so busy and you're moving a lot, the
kids schedule is so much different, which is terrible
when you come home, you know? But let me try and gather my
thoughts here on, like what I'm trying to say.
But like, you know, you come home, you feel like you missed
stuff. The schedule is different when
you're away. You try to FaceTime call and be

(27:46):
a part of it. But you know, they have nap
times, they have bed times. They wake up at a certain time,
which is completely the oppositeof your clock when you're on the
road. So like, you know, 8:00, my
daughter's going to bed. That's prime time Showtime.
OK, so I'm missing good nights. OK, let me try and get good
mornings. I've been up till 3:00 in the
morning. I'm up at 10:11 AM, You know

(28:10):
what I mean? I wake up, I have like half an
hour. She's going in for a nap.
It's like, you know, and then when you get home, the kids
like, for example, I got home atlike 1:00 in the morning last
night. The kid was up at 6:30.
So like you're not getting the sleep you're.
And then when you are with her in the morning, like it's
incredible. She's so happy to see me.

(28:30):
She's throw whatever. You know, my wife's like every
morning she runs to like your side of the bed and thinks
you're there, which is like soulcrushing.
Yeah, you're like, that's fucking awful.
So like all you want to do is bethere.
So like I'm trying to do things in my life now to just manage my
time better and buy my time backso I can do whatever the fuck I
want. So I'm trying to outsource

(28:51):
everything I can. I'm trying to have editors,
videograhers, like I just want to show U and do what I do.
Everything else, everybody else can fucking deal with it because
I don't want to deal with anybody but my child and that's
that, you know what I mean? So like, tell me where I got to
be, at what time, deposit the money in my account.
If I have to take half my money and give it to other people so

(29:11):
that I can do fuck all in my backyard with my kid when she's
home and available to do it perfect, no problem.
You know what I mean? Like, I don't mind losing a
chunk of my money to other people if it's going to make
this journey or my career run smoother, you know, give it up
to Diddy. That's the one thing he said
that made sense. He was like outsource man as

(29:32):
soon as you can, which he was like, 'cause then you can have
more oil parties, right? Like that was this whole thing.
But so many, I think Jay-Z said that, too.
It was just like the sooner thatyou can get people to take on
the hats that you're wearing that can just do it better than
you. Like I'm at the point, dude,
where like everyone you're dealing with does this pretty

(29:53):
well. Like does other things really
well. So like, why am I going to try
and learn how to use lenses and cameras and spend 2 weeks with a
camera trying to figure it the fuck out?
Let me pay this kid who literally sleeps next to his
lenses and would like bury me inany conversation with this
stuff. Like why am I bothering?

(30:14):
Pay him his fee, have him show up.
It's going to look 20 times better.
It's going to runway smoother. We're gonna have no headaches,
you know what I mean? So I've learned the hard way
many times by hiring people who don't know what the fuck they're
doing. So, you know, that was very
long. No, it's a.
It's a good point. I mean and.
I don't know if I dealt with howI deal with the mental health,
but you don't man like you like you know you.

(30:36):
Sorry, I got to get the sweat. Oh my God.
Yeah, dude, look at. This this water.
This is the water bottle just dripping sweat.
I'm wearing fucking. My thighs are out anyways.
I love it. Sorry, I don't like dude, you
binge eat. That's my biggest problem in
life. I binge eat and I do everything

(30:57):
in excess so I'm not a big drinker.
I've tried to cut alcohol almostentirely because like if me and
you were sitting here having beers, I'd be like 6 beers deep
because I drink it to finish it.Do you know what I mean?
I eat to finish it. I don't do blow on certain drugs
because if I do, we're doing it until it's done, you know?
What I'm saying that was me, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, Like you, just that's the culture we come from

(31:20):
is like, you must finish this plate of food because the war
happened and it might happen again.
And if you don't eat these potatoes, you might never see a
potato again. That's my no, no, you know.
Yeah, well, the kids across the world don't get it, so, you
know, right. Should be grateful that you have
it right. Yeah, so that's where, you know,
after shows, dude, it's fucked. Like I just, I eat enough for a

(31:40):
lot of people. Yeah.
So you know, what's your go to? I love diners, dude.
I just, they're the fucking best.
Like greasy spoons? Greasy spoon diners do where
ladies triceps are taking your orders like the swinging fucking
triceps. Yeah, Bertha.
Yeah, fucking Betty. Luanne Sue.
Like she's got a the shorter haircut than me and shit.

(32:04):
Like I love that her triceps swinging, her hands feel like
fucking Basel. Like, you know, this is the shit
I like because you can get anything you want, bro.
Like I love fucking yeah this atnight, you know what I mean?
Yeah. So like I'm basically just
having a construction plate. I love I fuck with the
construction plate all the time.Yeah, give me the lumberjack,

(32:25):
whatever you guys call it. Yeah, you know what I mean.
Like. Do you do you have any places
that you love to play like wherethe fans just kind of, you know,
feel more receptive to your jokes or.
Yeah, I mean, I love Alberta. Alberta's great.
Like in Canada, Yeah, Alberta seems to be awesome.
I mean, I've been going there for a long time, so that helps.
But like the audiences are just fucking, they're loving it, man.
They're like they're there to fucking laugh and they get it.

(32:49):
They're no, they are a very conservative province.
It's a. Pretty blue over there.
It's very blue, but where if youtake a place like Ottawa that's
very red Liberal, let's say, I can tailor my bits to really

(33:10):
anyone can be more racist, you know what I mean?
Or like more stereotypically this or that, or push these
buttons or play more conservative.
We can all do that. It's harder to play more left,
I'd say, which is, let's call itcleaner.
But I've been doing corporate clean comedy for fucking since I
started. So.
But you just find that the audience member is more nervous

(33:31):
to laugh at stuff because of howthey they will be perceived if
they will get in trouble. Oh, they're there with their
government staff party and they're always like, like they
always feel like they have to hide their laughs, which is the
complete opposite of what a liberal is, which makes me like
my brain baffle. But in Alberta, they're just
like, yeah, sure, they want you to go this way.

(33:55):
But regardless, they're just open for like, yeah, man, let's
fucking do it tonight. You know what I mean?
Regardless of what you say. So if you drop a little bit of
this or that, they love it, theyeat it up.
Now I don't, I try not to do that.
I do my shit the same everywhere.
But you know, you play to your audience and fuck, Alberta's
just ready to go, man. Yeah, yeah, it seems like that,

(34:16):
you know, they just, they're just want to have a good time,
right? They they know what they came
for Yeah, Cuz when I go to a comedy show, I want to laugh,
right? I want I you know I'm AI like
dark jokes right? And some people don't want to
laugh. Why they come to comedy clubs?
I know this sounds insane, but like you can feel it where they
come in nervous. They're like, I hope they don't
make fun of me. I hope they don't see this.

(34:37):
I really hope that that doesn't like you see people being like
nervous on. Guard.
Their their guards up. That's the whole first half of
the show is to be like fucking relax, man.
It's like even people who sit infront row like oh fuck, it's
like, dude, what am I going to say?
That's going to really shatter your day here.
Hey, you're a loser. Hey, you're a fat bald fuck.
Like what am I going to say? And like, and if I say that

(34:58):
you're going to be like feel like you're just going to cry
and breakdown. Like I don't get it why people
get so nervous, but a lot of them don't like being around
people or being the center of the tension or picked on.
Like it's triggering for some people to be like a man.
You look like a fucking hey, youknow, you look like this guy.
Everyone can see you from behindyou.
You can't see anybody else. You feel picked on or whatever.

(35:20):
So like, I get it, but like no one's there.
Be the butt end of the joke for half a second, dude.
Be part of the greater cause forjust literally 10 seconds 'cause
I am going to be for the next hour and a half and you're
paying to see it so fuck, just relax.
You know, easier said than done.I know things can be trigger for
some people, but anyways I talk a lot.

(35:40):
Do you do it's OK feel? Free to be like OK mark yo, but
listen. I have people in here so that we
can hear them. I talk too much anyways on this
podcast so don't even. Worry.
No, I feel like you don't talk enough.
I mean, you should be like Mark,OK, that's enough.
Yeah, I need a guy to just like,hey.
Yeah, I have a guy right on the other side.
I can't be like, OK, yeah, shut the fuck up, dude.
I feel like so the thing with doyou do crowd work yeah, cuz a

(36:04):
lot yeah. I feel like it could go either
way, right. But the thing I like about crowd
work, at least from the clips that I cuz I don't, I don't
know, being an being a viewer ofthat like, so it's a taped
special. You know, live is different.
Live anything goes for me. Live.
I like whatever I'm there to see.
It's your show. But I, I kind of I'm a little

(36:24):
more picky with my, my stand up that I watch recorded.
You see a lot of things go in places that you don't
necessarily think that they're gonna go.
Do you have any good stories about like that Working the
crowd and you know how it ended up?
Oh, like it going somewhere and it's like turns into a gem
moment type thing. Like it turns out, man, this was

(36:46):
such a good moment like a month ago and I have the clip.
It's going to come out soon. Perfect.
Once I edit it, which might not be for another five years.
Like fucking editors. So this guy was in this girl was
in the front row. Beautiful, beautiful woman
sitting front row. No one next to it was a theater

(37:07):
show in Hamilton. No one's sitting next to her.
And the guy on her left, like onher right side.
So I looked at them as if they were oh, no, right.
And I was like, oh, you guys aretogether.
She's like, no, no, no, I'm. I'm not with him, all right.
And his wife was next to him. I was like, oh, sorry, whatever.
Did some crowd work on these two?
Whatever. And I was like, is this seat
next to you empty? Like, where are they?

(37:29):
Like, where is this person? And they were like, oh, he's
here. He's just going to get drinks.
I was like, oh, nice. I was like, what does he do for
a living? She was like, I have no idea.
I'm like, do you know this person?
And she's like, yeah, yeah. This is like our, like, third
date. I'm like, oh, what's his name?
I'm like, we should do somethingfun.
Like when he comes in, we'll like, boom at the same time or
like, cheer or say something right?

(37:49):
Or chant his name. I was like, what's his name?
We'll chant his name. She's like, I have no idea.
I was like, you don't know what he does.
You don't know his name, and he's buying you drinks.
He bought tickets to the show. Yes.
Have you put out? No, what's been going on?
I was like these last three days, he's paid for everything.
I'm like, so this guy is wine and dining you for the last two

(38:10):
months, taking you on like 3 or 4 dates.
You don't know his name. She's like, no, as I say that
dude. This guy comes walking.
Oh my God. Perfect.
And I'm like, Boo, like we all start booing him.
OK, I shouldn't have done that. I felt so bad.
But he's into it. He's got his beers.
He's like, fuck yeah, fuck you guys, whatever, right?
He sits down and I'm like, hey, buddy, what's your name?

(38:32):
And he's like Steve. And I look at him like, you
know, I give her a head nod. I'm like, what do you do for a
living? Blah, blah, blah.
I get all this information out, dude, about him.
And she looks at me. She's like, thank you.
And I look at the audience. I'm like, I'm doing the Lord's
work. And he had no idea.
No clue, I'm like saving relationships one day at a time.
You're like, this guy's a poor. SAP was she embarrassed while

(38:54):
you were doing that? Oh, she was dying, dude.
She was dying. Yeah.
It was such a funny moment because, like, the whole
audience was in on something. Like that's what I like about
crowd workers. Like if when you get good
moments, man, they're fucking, they're the best moments of the
show 'cause they know it's organic, you know?
Then there's parts where you have duts who fucking say
nothing or try to like out joke you and you're like just answer
me dude. Like you know, what do you do

(39:15):
for a living? Your mom, You're like OK my mom,
you fucked my mom out of shit like.
You got me. You got me dude.
Now what? Like now this sucks and you're a
loser have. You ever had a Heckler?
Oh yeah, yeah. How do you deal with that?
I I find it interesting how everyone kind of deals with it,
but. I just try to engage with them
as little as possible. Like you talk to them, you try
and shut it down a little bit, you know what I mean?

(39:38):
Give them their true seconds of fame, you know, and then try and
flip it and make it funny somehow.
I don't try to go like roast forroast because I'm not the best
roast comic unless I'm angry. And when I get angry and I'm
like going at you, it's hard forme to like revert back to like
my usual self on stage, you knowwhat I mean?

(39:59):
And I feel like it takes away from the rest of the show.
And I hate when people come and we get side railed by this
bullshit for like 10 minutes. But that being said, I've been
like out roasted to death. Oh really?
Oh. This one lady, dude, she was
hammered in Kingston, bro. She roasted me so bad where I
started laughing, being like you're on fire, like you're
killing. Come up here.

(40:19):
Yeah. Like she was, and I was hosting
the show, so like I got on stageand she was standing up chirping
how I was looking and I was like, buddy, the show isn't even
fucking started yet, whatever. And the crowd is dying 'cause
like she said something about like, like I look like Patrick
from SpongeBob, like something like this.
And I started laughing. I start chirping her.
They're laughing. I'm like, OK, I won, we're good.

(40:41):
She does it again. I can't even remember.
I haven't recorded somewhere, but we go back and forth a few
lines and then she gives me likefucking three or four in a row.
Just darts. Like every one of them crushing
the audience is like hyperventilating.
And I'm just standing there. I'm like, OK, you win.
Like I, I lost Like this is fucked.
You are unbelievable. Like, you know, and I made them

(41:03):
start the show over again. Like I was like, I'm going to
get off stage. We're going to play music again.
Like I'm getting on stage and I'm coming back on and we're
starting the show again. Like I can't, I'll die like
this. You know what I mean?
Maybe she was a a comic. No, no, she was just like your
standard. It was a construction company's
concrete construction company's Christmas party that was in the

(41:25):
audience. And she was like, you know, the
bra who smoked fucking 40 packs.Edition.
Oh yeah. Yeah, she's like, yeah, yeah.
It'll just like your fucking, you know?
She's like, I bet you have gout like, you know what I mean?
Like. How about you come back with
that? I'm like, fuck, I don't.
Yeah, yeah, sure. You got a sleep apnea machine in
the hotel. Like they're like oh fuck dude.
Like and like she just sounds hilarious and like she's the

(41:46):
fucking ball Buster in the. Office who?
Deals with guys that look like me all day.
She's she's already got a one upon you.
Yeah, she's got credibility. She's got credibility around the
office. Yeah, VIP ball Buster.
Oh my God, Where do you see yourfuture going, Mark?
Like, what do you, what do you want to do?
What's next for you? I don't.
Know dad, like fuck, what's yourfive year plan?

(42:10):
I love you. You're gonna make money doing
what? Yeah, sorry.
What's this? What's the whole thing here?
You're charging how much? Yeah.
What's next for you? I mean, my goal is to get out of
this couch as soon as possible because I'm sweating.
I'm sorry. About that, No, no, I'm joking.
I'm hoping the goal for stand up.
I'd love to, you know, be selling out theaters across

(42:31):
North America. That'd be great.
I'd like, I only want to do 1 stadium and that's fucking ours,
you know what I mean? I'd love to do Air Canada
Center. That's what I call it still.
Scotia Bank. Yeah, I'd like to do Scotia.
Bank Yeah, ACC it's way better. Yeah, even Roger Center, like,
you know, no one, no comedian has done that.
I know it's completely unnecessary and not ideal for
comedy. Why the the acoustics are all

(42:52):
fucked up. I guess, yeah.
Yeah. Well, it's also like you're
watching the screen the whole time, you know what I mean?
Like, have you been in any comedy shows at the Scotia Bank?
Yeah, Dean Cook, a long time ago.
Yeah, like you watch the screen the whole time or?
Yeah, I know. I watched.
I watched the screen. Yeah, like I saw Sebastian.
I was like, I was in the lower bowl, but I was watching the
screen the whole time. Like, yeah, he's funny.
When you're that physical in your fate, like you want to, you
got to be pretty close. So I feel like theaters is as

(43:14):
big as it can get without feeling too distant.
And some theaters that are in like the, you know, 5 like 6-7
thousand range, it still feels like when you're in the back on
the balcony, like you're like, Ican't believe they don't have a
screen here. Like this is, you know, they're
so small and so far away. You feel really detached, like
it sucks. I I would hate to buy it like

(43:36):
someone buy a ticket to my show and feel that disconnected.
So, but I do feel like there's agood happy medium and there's
some good venues out there to beat that nice, you know, like
sound. Center Meridian.
Yeah, I mean, Meridian is fucking huge.
Like, is it? Yeah.
And I, I love Meridian Hall, butthat's the show I'm talking
about. Like I was in like, you know,
row 30 on the balcony. And I was like, I'm just like, I

(43:56):
don't even, they're like miniature.
There's no screens. I felt really out of it, you
know what I mean? But yeah, I think I saw Theo Von
there one time. Yeah, I think it was at that
one, but. But I mean, the price reflected
like I paid like 30 bucks was like, whatever.
Yeah, I don't even remember who the fuck I saw, to be honest.
Jim Gaffigan. Jim Gaffigan?
Nice. But I love Jim Gaffigan and my
wife hates Jim Gaffigan. Yeah, yeah.

(44:18):
You either love him or you. Hate him, my wife's like this is
the worst show I've ever seen. And like, too dark or just.
No, she was just like, I don't even know what the fuck this is
like. Yeah, she's just like, I don't
like, it's not funny. That's.
Outrage. There's nothing worse than when
you go to a comedy show someone and you're the only one laughing
and you're like, are we gonna have to break up now?
Oh yeah. Oh, my wife's the worst.
Like for her style of comedy, I'm like, I don't even know what

(44:38):
you find funny at all. Like she's like, you're
hilarious. I'm like, OK, but like, that's
not good. That's good.
Yeah, right. But like, I've taken her to see,
like, a lot of the greats and she's like, I don't know, dude.
Like that was OK. You know, I get it.
Some venues, like, like I said, you know, you see Chappelle at
Scotiabank, you're like, you know, it's hard to get into it.
You know, we went to see Kevin Hart.
I was Scotiabank fucking like last row just.

(45:01):
Bleeding. Yeah, I'm nose just drenched and
I'm like, this wasn't great, butyou know.
It's all on the venue. It's all on the venue.
And where you're sitting. Yeah, I mean, I'd like to do
some movies or some TV or something too, like, you know,
do some comedy, acting and. Yeah, sure you were.
Yeah, you were in a Canadian Tire commercial.
I meant to bring that up to you.Yeah, that was funny it.

(45:22):
Was whatever dude, I did like 900 takes.
They chose the worst one. I liked it.
It was just like an. Yeah, whatever.
It was fun. We did a bunch of takes.
A lot of great people on that shoe.
That was fun. But you know, commercials, I
don't love them. I'm also the Planet Fitness
Sasquatch. I don't know if you.
Know. Oh no.
Wow. Have you seen those commercials?
Yeah, I'm going to watch those differently now with a different
mindset, Yeah. So.

(45:43):
That's my friend, yeah. The more, dude, I love the
comedy, acting stuff, you know, like all the sketches.
That's what I get to do on social media, you know, except
low budget. But yeah, like, you know, that's
why I got into it. You know, I wanted to be fucking
Chris Farley and Mike Myers and do 50 characters and shit.
So that'd be fun to do somethinglike that.
Yeah, I love your stuff man appreciate it.

(46:04):
I I want to close with this and I usually on my podcast with
with something some. I feel like I have not talked
about mental health at all like and how I deal with it, which is
like. You complained a lot.
No, I'm kidding. Yeah, exactly.
That's all I do, dude. That's I rant.
I complain. You know what's funny?
My wife would say this. My wife would say Mark deals

(46:24):
with mental health by calling people during the day and saying
the same story to 40 people. That's good.
That's that's helpful. That works.
Man, yeah. Yeah, it's the science.
There I do find that it works and you get different
perspectives. It's kind of what I do with
jokes, like I'll call like 4 different comics to run bit the
same bit by them, but they're all very different.
So I'm getting a wide range of, you know?

(46:45):
Yeah, I mean, in recovery it's the same thing.
So whenever, every time I relapsed, it was always because
I had a great idea that I didn'tbounce off anybody, right.
And I always make this joke, butwhen I have good ideas, like,
and when I mean good idea, I mean about specifically like,
I'm feeling this way and I want to fix it.
And I know what's going to work,right?

(47:06):
That alcohol, that Band-Aid, that quick solution.
And then immediately you might have heard this one might not
have heard this. This is common across all of us.
Immediately it's like you, you just 100% forget about all the
bad times. Like it just, it just escapes
your memory all of a sudden. And you just remember that one
fucking quick moment that you had where you're like, that was
fun. Yeah, let's do it.

(47:27):
That was fun. Luckily I'm I'm further away
from that now, but it's because I talk to people and I call.
So I always make the joke that whenever I have this idea of and
I, I'm like, Nope, that's good. I'm going to do it.
I'm going to I'm going to start taking ADHD medication again.
That was one for me. I'm going to get on steroids.
That was another one for me. And it's just like it's a
seemingly small thing that kind of grows into this, you know,

(47:48):
smoking mess again, right? Eventually, right.
So. Eventually you're like, I'll get
there. It's coming.
Yeah, No. It's coming.
Yeah. So, yeah, just quickly, the the
thing, the analogy that I like to give is like, it's like me
performing to an audience of myself.
And I'm just like, this is my idea.
And everyone's like, yeah, do it, man.
That's great, right? It's not a good way to live.

(48:10):
No, I hear you. I'm trying to think of the
things that I actually do to cope with stuff.
Blasting music at an uncomfortable level in my car is
definitely one. I love long drives.
Like everyone's like, Oh, I can't believe you.
I'm like, I want to drive and I would prefer if you weren't in
the car. You know what I mean?
Like it's all like like when I'mpeople like, oh, you're going to

(48:31):
you want a hotel for the gig? I'm like, no, it's like a four
hour drive back home at like midnight.
I would love that. Oh fuck, dude.
And I'm like have the volume maxed out and just have music
going. I'll bawl my eyes out sometimes.
Like, you know, you just you go through your head quite a bit.
That's great. Or something to really like
going to the movies. Like the movie theater is one of

(48:53):
my favorite things on the planet.
Me too, because you don't you'renot looking at your phone.
You're fully submerged into thispiece of art, if you will.
Couldn't agree with anymore for that period of time and it
really pulls you out of it. It's like any live stuff.
Like I go see bands all the time.
Like anytime I go see something live where you got to be in it
is the best because it it pulls you out of it.
You have to pay attention, you get submerged into it, you go on

(49:15):
this journey that they mean for you to go on, and then all of a
sudden you're like, oh, I forgot2.
Hours. You're not thinking about
yourself. Yeah, and you know what's funny?
One of the best. I have to sit up because this is
fucking. Impressive, I mean.
Fuck, by the end of it my chin'seating my neck.
But this conversation, one of the best messages I've ever
gotten in my life. This guy sends me a message

(49:37):
being like hey man don't mean tobother you but it was like a
fucking essay of a thing. Doesn't matter.
He goes. I was planning on killing myself
today and I was taking a shit this morning to have my whole
day planned out of exactly how Iwas going to do it.
I had letters pre written and ready to go, but on the toilet I

(49:58):
got doom scrolling on your page and laughed at like a bunch of
videos and I totally forgot to go and kill myself.
And I was like, all right, that's sick.
And he was like, yeah, he's likeI I like my plan was to get up
and go to like Home Depot and buy stuff.
You know what I mean? He's like, I was going to go and

(50:18):
like execute this plan that I had.
But when I got off the shooter, like I just started my day like
a normal day. Like I, I laughed, I got up and
then just like unconsciously made a coffee and then made
breakfast and then went to the gym.
Like, and like, it hit me while I was at the gym that, like, I
didn't kill myself today becauseI got sucked into your videos.
Wow. And I was like, it's pretty

(50:39):
powerful. Oh, dude, it blew me away.
I was like, OK, this is a message that, like, I put on my
wall. And when my dad says you're a
loser, I go, yeah, yeah. Have you stopped anybody?
No, but like have you prevented suicide today?
Yeah, you have never. So you probably encouraged it by
a few people at your work. You know, that I think you suck,

(51:00):
but no, but I like, I've gotten quite a few messages like that,
not that detailed, quite a few people being like, hey, I've
been in a dark place. Your videos helped me out,
whatever, you know? So that's half the reason why I
do what I do. And those moments when things
are in a dark place or whatever,you're like, OK, A, I'm grateful
that I do what I like to do in the 1st place.

(51:23):
B It helps a lot of people see alot of people feel inspired for
some reason. And I that sounds like the most
egotistical thing I've ever said.
But like I stumbled in on a conversation at STL, actually at
our old high school and like theteachers were using me as an
example of like monetizing something that you're interested
in and turning it into a career and like things take time and

(51:47):
whatever. Just using me as an example of a
road less traveled, if you will,as if I'm like some great
success story and I'm like, I live with my none the dude.
Don't listen to these guys, whatever, you know, and like as
much as I joked about it, I was like, I was blown away that
like, you know, a lot of these kids followed me, their families
friend, like follow me and family and friends follow me.

(52:08):
And so like, I don't know, I wasjust blown away by that.
And I was like, OK, when shit gets tough, it could be so much
fucking worse. Like, you see what you open up
your Instagram in the last two weeks, you're like, it's crazy
how many people are dying and going through the craziest shit
on the planet. So the fact that I'm at The Keg
at midnight in Montreal and their kitchen is staying open

(52:29):
for us because they're fans or they came to the show.
What the fuck am I complaining about?
You know what I mean? Yeah, you're like, life is
great, so I can't complain. I have a podcast, buddy.
I'm done to complain and rant all day long, which is my
therapy. Nice.
I also have had a life coach andmultiple therapists over the

(52:52):
years, so you know what I mean. There you go, talking to people
and listening to music, drowningmyself home.
Have you answered that quickly? You answered that very well.
So yeah, I do. Hope so, my God.
I I I'm being honest when I say like, I don't laugh out loud a
lot at Instagram videos, but whenever I watch yours,

(53:12):
especially the nono stuff, because it's so relatable.
I think so relatable. A lot of comedy is like, can the
audience relate to what I'm whatI'm saying?
For sure could do they yeah, me too.
Like and dude, that's me too. That's hilarious.
But I that's all of it. Like there's a stupid movie.
I can't believe I'm going to reference this.

(53:33):
There's a movie called August Rush.
Have you seen that? No.
Is it August Rush? Gold I.
Think it's called August Rush? Should I watch it?
No. Yeah.
It's OK. It's about a kid who's like a
musical genius, whatever, and hemakes music based off the sounds
he has like a hyper hearing disability.
But like he's in like he's sitting on the subway train and

(53:54):
he's like listening to traffic and like noises and he notices
that they go in patterns and rhythms and then creates music
out of it. And this whole thing is like the
music's all around us. Comedy's the exact same way.
We're like, I'll go through something and I'm like, I know
because this is literally everything.
I know that 9000 other people have gone through this exact

(54:15):
thing. It's all been talked about.
And like you, I noticed that when I got married and I had a
kid, specifically when I got married, when I got married, so
many things fell into place withlike other comments when I would
watch comedy before I got married about guys talking about
their wives. Like all the premises are like
the same 10 premises really. And they're all taking their

(54:36):
take on it. And you like you can listen to
comics from like the 50s, dude. Like you listen to Richard Pryor
talk about marriage and kids. You're like, I'm going through
this exact same thing. Do you know what I mean?
So it's all relatable. Everyone has family, everyone's
got a grandfather, grandmother, whatever, you know what I mean?
It's like the more I don't know,people are like, I struggle with
finding content or what to do. I'm like, what did you do today?

(54:58):
Did you stub your toe getting out of bed Good. 10 million
people have done that. Start with that.
Start with that. Like.
It's just it's all around you atall times.
You just have to find a way to display it.
In in your perspective, I don't know if you've ever read Rick
Rubin's book Creative Way. He talks about that a lot and I
love it. I'm reading it right now.
I'm like halfway through. He talks about like, we're all

(55:19):
kind of this like. Yeah, nothing's been done.
Just. Experiencing and everything
you've ever done has been done. Before, Yeah, sorry,
everything's been done and nothing's.
New and nothing's new. And you, it's just you're
putting your perspective on it. What you're creating is not for
the audience, it's for you. And you're just taking in the
world and then regurgitating it.It's it's so true.
Your content is all around you. You know your inspiration is all
around you, right? I can't listen to him talk much

(55:43):
so his. Audio book.
I listen to the audio book. I didn't read the book book
because I'll never get through it, but like I was listening to
his audio book. I hate when it's the guy I know.
Like really? I used to love that.
Yeah, you hate when it's the guyreading his own book.
Yeah, because I'm like, this sounds so much more pretentious.
Or they'll try to read it. Yeah, yeah, A.
Reader, I'm like, no, man, you don't sound like that, you know,

(56:03):
because I listen to him in interviews and I love it.
I've watched every Rick Rubin interview ever.
But then in his audio book, I'm like, OK, dude, stop narrating
Harry Potter here. Like, you're killing me.
Like, you know what? Like, you just end up putting me
to bed, you know? So I try to like, you know, when
they do it. Like I think Jordan Peterson
does that too. Where he tries to read his own
kind of in, in the way that you that he thinks it should be

(56:24):
read. Yeah, and I know that's the
point, but like have some like, you know, some British guy who
was just like, you know, just I was walking down the street and
I know just like whatever, you know, you have to shit.
Oh, you don't have to. Just saying like all together.
Oh, OK, OK. Yeah, I'm good.
I don't give a shit. I'll do stuff to the camera
myself. What else do I do about mental

(56:47):
health? Talk to people on the phone.
I doom scroll, man. Fuck.
Scrolling is one of those thingsthat really just gets you.
You ever noticed that where you're like you're scrolling and
all of a sudden it's like an hour and a half later?

(57:07):
You ever dropped the phone on your face?
What a fuck. That's when I know I'm like,
you're not in bed. You're going to bed and you're
like elbow and like hands go numb completely and you're like,
wow, I've been doing this for two hours.
But it's it's the same thing as going to the moves.
Like, you just feel like, OK, let me find something to either

(57:28):
learn or laugh at. Like I don't go to bed until
I've like laughed out loud because there's some nights,
dude, you try to replicate it every night.
Like I'll be scrolling and I'll find something that makes me
laugh harder than I've laughed in like a month.
Then the next night you're like,OK, I got to find that again.
Or you watch the same meme dude.You ever watch the same meme

(57:50):
over and over again? I watch this one meme dude where
like this guy comes, his wife and him are taking the dog for a
walk and then he trips over the dog and falls into the fucking
garden and like crashes the garden table over.
It's one of the funniest things ever and he's like sham it.
You ever seen that? No, I'm talking to the camera

(58:11):
about other ways. Talking to the audience.
Talking to the audience about how I cope with things, I was
saying doom scrolling is one of those things.
Yeah, that's a, that's a rough one because hours will go by and
you just. Hours.
Yeah, but like I was saying, like, I love it when you find a
gem. Like I'll find something where I
laugh at it. Yeah, harder than I've laughed
all month. Yeah.
So then that's like the next night I'm like fuck I hope I
find a fucking gem dude. You know you're like addicted to

(58:34):
the the next laugh, right? You're like, it has to be
better. That's my whole career, dude.
Yeah, my career in a nutshell. Wait, you?
You mean you you'd want to find a gem for yourself?
No, I want to find a gym to like, laugh.
I laugh harder. Yeah, yeah, but my career in a
nutshell is the next laugh. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's a good comedy name. Like that on your shirt?

(58:54):
No. Yeah.
It's a good comedy album. Yeah, there.
You go. You're welcome the.
Last laugh, the next laugh. Yeah, and when you're famous,
you can all tribute to recovering a Loud podcast.
Oh, 100. Percent, yeah.
You know who you look like? You kind of look like a.
Fergie's boyfriend. Who?
Who's that? Josh Duhamel.
No, I. See, I've been, I've been told

(59:16):
that before, but also I think I'm better than I am, so.
You look like like if your brother was an alcoholic it
would be Strombo George Strombo Lavas.
Oh yeah, like an older brother, Yeah.
Like Strombo could easily be your older brother that used to
just bully the shit out of you and like.
Well, he's doing well so. He's doing really well, but he

(59:38):
looks like he's. Been strung out?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. He looks like unfortunate
because I don't think he ever was.
No, sorry, George, if you're watching this, he follows me.
We've chatted before. George, listen, I don't think
that you look like that, all right?
I'm just saying it's. OK, he'll never see this, don't
worry. He'll see it.
I'm going to make him. I'm going to send this to him.
Don't clip this out. Yeah, I don't, I don't think.

(01:00:01):
Thank you though. That's a compliment.
He's a good looking guy. Yeah, and if I could be half as
popular, no wrong word. If I could be half as successful
as him, I'd be happy. I don't want to be popular.
I don't like limelight. I don't, but a part of me does.
It's. Such a weird balance because
it's like it goes hand in hand. It's like, well, if you're

(01:00:21):
popular, you'll get all the other things, you know what I
mean, that come with it that youprobably want.
Yeah, it should be a bonus, right?
It should be a a result, you know?
Do you get noticed in public? It's ridiculous really, eh?
I hate I that was the worst, like the most egotistical answer
ever, but like it's it's great to.
Be honest so. It's quite a bit.
I'm grateful, but also sometimesit's like you're at the kids

(01:00:44):
park waiting for me. Yeah, that's crazy.
So what do they want? Like a selfie or?
Yeah. Which is fine.
Like I don't. I love meeting everybody.
I'm blown away that it even happened.
Yeah, I know. Like.
Like, it's insane. It's like I feel like I'm a
nobody and I don't think I'm anybody at all.
But it's like especially when I'm with people who've known me
forever and they and it happens,they're like, what the fuck is
this? Yeah, yeah.

(01:01:04):
I'm like, I know, dude. It's ridiculous.
Like I'll be at the mall with mykids and like someone will see
my kid and notice my kid. Jesus.
Yeah, they'll be like, Oh my God.
Oh, and see my wife and I'm like, is your husband here?
Like my wife has been getting noticed, she tells me.
And I'm like, what the fuck? You're not in anything, you
know. This isn't what I wanted.
Yeah, and I mean, like, it's fine, dude.
Like, I love it. Again, it all goes back to that

(01:01:27):
DM dude. It's like for them, dude, it's
changing their day. They're excited to meet me just
because I make videos. Like incredible, dude.
Like, it's incredible. Yeah, that's great, man.
If you could, if you could say something to a, you know, a
comic that's just starting out or a creator or somebody that
you know is struggling right nowwith with where they're going to

(01:01:47):
go next with their career and what they're going to do.
They want to do this full time. What would you say to that
person? In comedy specifically.
Or, or any general, but yeah, let do comedy because I think
that's pretty unique. And don't do it, buddy.
Yeah, turn around. Yeah.
No, no, do it. Don't take it too seriously

(01:02:07):
'cause you have to have fun. You know what I mean?
When people take it too seriously and they're too in the
weeds of things, like they're like get too.
You get lost in the minutia of things.
Big word is it? I don't even know how to spell
it. Yeah.
Neither do I. Minutia.
I'd ask tragedy to you. Talk to minutia anyways, so you

(01:02:28):
just like I know, just have fun and don't take it too seriously.
Sounds like the most like it sounds like a fucking Robin
Williams book cover. Like do that.
Like do that. Because if the audience is
coming to see you and have fun, if you're not having fun, how
are they supposed to have fun? If you take things too
seriously, you won't progress. You know what I mean?

(01:02:49):
Like, you can't. You got to let the haters roll
off your back. If you have a bad set, it's got
to roll off your back. You have to do the next one.
Like you just can't, you know, don't.
You're a comedian. Everything's a joke.
That's the problem that we face with regular people.
Let's call it non comms. That's what we call non comms.

(01:03:10):
That's great. Yeah.
Oh, I've never heard that. Yeah, non comms.
The problem is we take we find the joke everywhere and we're
like, that's a muscle you work at all the time.
It's like let's find the funny everywhere.
So like when I'm at a funeral and I'm laughing at something or
like I can't compose myself or like I say a joke to my brother
and he's fucking like vibrating next to me laughing to tears and

(01:03:34):
people think he's crying. Like it gets you in trouble.
But like, you know, that's the point, right?
Like we're always trying to findthat.
So if you're taking things too seriously, you're you're going
to limit yourself. So nice.
Where can we find you, Mark? Everywhere and anywhere, baby at
not Mark Anthony on all platforms.
Mark with AC, not with AK. Yeah, don't.

(01:03:56):
Fuck that up. Don't.
Fuck that up. But if you type it in with AK,
it will still come up, which is great.
So, yeah, Mark anthony.com. Any shows coming up?
Nah dude, not. Yet.
I got a big tour coming up in the fall, another big, it's
coming up. I got a lot of things coming up
like, but nothing like Set in Stone that I can release at the
moment. So, but yeah, I'm always posting

(01:04:18):
about stuff. So if you want to see me live
there, I will be always promoting to see me.
Beautiful dude. I appreciate you so much.
Thanks for coming down. Appreciate you.
It's hot as fuck. Thank you.
You're a good dude. It's 38° in the studio guys, but
it's actually shocking. Like it's, it's crazy because
I'm not sweating much here, but like I'm going to get up.
My back is going to be just. You're like a duck.

(01:04:40):
It's all happening under the water.
Everything looks good. Up to That's hilarious.
But everything but you're fuck. Yeah, that seems like an analogy
at a mental health place. How'd you know?
It has to be, yeah. Everything's OK except I'm
drinking like crazy and I can't stop smoking meth.
Meth dude guys listen. Like, comment, subscribe.
This is the podcast Recording Out Loud.

(01:05:03):
What is it? What is it?
Recovering out loud. Guys like comment, subscribe,
Recovering out loud with Anthonyand Marc Anthony.
Thanks buddy, love you. Thanks for listening.
Please help us grow the channel and like, share and subscribe
for more content. The discussions and stories

(01:05:24):
shared on this podcast are for informational and motivational
purposes only. This content is not a substitute
for professional medical advice,addiction treatment, or therapy.
If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction,
please consult A licensed physician, addiction specialist,
or mental health professional. You are no longer alone.