Ep 9 Mind Your Business Sabrina "Shine: Williams

Are you minding your business? 

I used to think that when someone said “Mind your business” it meant something bad. In reality, it is a great piece of advice. I am my business and I must learn to take care of myself first. 

Three possible steps in taking care of your business:

1 - Put on your oxygen mask first

2 - Set boundaries 

3 - Be a light once you are overflowing

When you serve from your overflow your cup stays full and you aren’t depleted. Serving from overflow is practicing self-love and self-care. Listen to the full conversation. 

Where are you in “minding your own business?” I invite you to share it in the chat. 

Feel free to apply or recommend guests who are empowering, educating, and uplifting! tinyurl.com/podcastrecommendatio

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All episodes can be found at http://www.shinebrightwithsabrina.com/ and your favorite podcast platform.

 

Episode Transcript

(00:06):
Mind your business.
Welcome to another episode of Shine
Bright with Sabrina, and I am your host,
Sabrina Shine Williams. This
is where we elevate stories to
amplify impact. Look,
there was a time in my life when somebody
would have said, girl, you need to mind
your business. I would have

(00:28):
taken it personal. And I would have been
so upset because I would have considered
it an insult. But today I
realized that when somebody said mind
your business, what they was doing was
actually giving me a great piece of
advice. Because I should have been
minding my own business every day
because my business is who

(00:50):
me and I should have been taking
care of me and taking care of what I need
versus out there worried about everybody
else, what they doing, making sure that
everybody else is being taken care of.
And if you have a traditional
business, you should be minding your
business. You should be making sure that
your business is being taken care of so

(01:12):
that it can be successful. And if you
don't have a traditional business,
realize that you are your business
and that you should be your priority to
make sure that you are being taken care
of with yourself. Love yourself
care, making sure that all the
0nutritions that you need is taken care 36 00:01:33,1000 --> 00:01:36,600 of. Because once you take care of

(01:36):
yourself properly, then you are
in a position to be able to take care of
other people. But before then
you can take care of nobody else fully
properly. Because you always trying to
serve from an empty cup or
and then you got to fill your cup back up
again and then try to serve somebody else

(01:58):
and fill them up again. Serve somebody
else they they serve from your
overflow. That's what you should
do. Is served from your overflow. If you
start serving from your overflow
then you don't have to worry
about ever trying to get that
what you've put out. I

(02:18):
have seen people that will loan
somebody else some money and the person
will promise them I'm going to pay you
back in two weeks. Here it
is 10 weeks and they still
haven't gotten their money back. So if
you are taking care of yourself.
And if you decide to loan money to
somebody, loan money from your

(02:40):
overflow, meaning if they don't pay
you back, it's OK. But now you know,
I'm not gonna. Ever
learn little Johnny no money anymore
because he ain't gonna pay me back or I'm
not gonna pay loan little Sally some
money 'cause she's not gonna pay me back.
Y'all know what I'm talking about? But

(03:00):
make sure that you are serving from your
overflow.
In a couple of things, when you're
looking at minding your business, you
have to figure out where you are on the
totem pole. Are you in the very first
spot? You are just now putting on your
own oxygen mask before you can
help anybody else. You're just now trying

(03:22):
to fill up your cup and allow
it to overflow so then you can
serve somebody else. If you
are at the very beginning, your cup is
not overflowing. Don't try to serve
somebody else because they're going to
deplete you completely.
And the end result is not going to be

(03:44):
good. It's best that you are full
before you're trying to assist somebody
else. Then the
second step place you might be at is
you're in the process of setting
boundaries. You're filling up your cup,
but now you're setting some boundaries.
And what I found is that most of the time
is women, we have the

(04:05):
tendency to do and be everything for
everybody. When really that's not
necessary. It's important that we are
the most important person for ourselves.
We have to learn to set some boundaries
so that we can
fill our cup and we can have
more light to give to other people.

(04:29):
Because when you are
depleted, when you have no
boundaries, everybody have access to you
whenever they want to. It's not a
good thing. Couple of things you
can do for setting boundaries. Maybe you
just don't answer your phone
at certain times. You make a conscious

(04:51):
effort not to answer your phone. Now that
we have cell phones, a lot of times it
feels like if my phone ring, I'm supposed
to answer. I'm supposed to be available
24/7. But there was a time when
this, the telephone was left at the house
and we used to go and be gone all day
and when we come back we have messages.
We answer the messages and then respond

(05:13):
to people. So maybe you start
setting a time when I am
with this particular person or doing this
particular time, I'm not answering my
phone for me. I have a do not
disturb on my phone. So after a
certain time, my phone doesn't ring
because I have decided between these

(05:34):
hours I'm not talking to anybody on the
phone. So that's something that
I have chosen to do to set my
boundaries. And let me be clear.
When you set your boundaries.
What's gonna happen is you will
most likely run into some people that's

(05:54):
upset with you about these new boundaries
that you set. Typically,
those are the people that have unlimited
access to you. All of a sudden now you're
telling them, Nope, you could only have
this much room, this much access,
and they are not gonna be happy. They're
gonna want to be able to cross those
boundaries. Now if you should slip up and

(06:16):
allow them to cross that boundary.
But get back on track, forgive yourself,
do not beat yourself up because this is
something new for you. So you have to get
back on track. If they should cross those
boundaries, they're going to be upset,
but that's their problem. That's not a
new problem, that's their problem. Then

(06:37):
the third place you might be at, maybe
you be in the light out here, baby, you
shining bright because you
overflowing and you want to be that
lighthouse for people to see.
You're shining bride in
just like the lighthouse. You're shining
bright in this Dark World, and you're

(06:59):
allowing people to see where they can
come to be safe. You're showing them the
safe harbor. You are just out here
shining bright. And you've been through
some things. Yeah, there may be sometimes
when you get a little dark at them
because the light does have to be
switched out every so often. It just
doesn't burn forever. But that's

(07:19):
OK because you are still the
lighthouse. You're letting people know
where they can come to safety.
Honestly, there was a time where I
didn't feel safe enough to be able to
share my desires, to share my
hurts, to share any of the dreams.
So I kept quiet. And we

(07:40):
tend to worry about what other people
feel and what other people need more than
we think about ourselves. And I'm here to
tell you, you don't have to put other
people before your needs. You don't have
to worry about taking care of other
people. Before you take care of yourself,
since you got to mind your business
and remember first of all, you are your

(08:01):
business. So you must take care of
yourself enough so that you can grow
and overflow. And then you can assist
other people and not feel
depleted and not feel like you are
diminishing who you are and you can show
up brighter and confidently.
So I have a question for

(08:22):
you. Are you?
Putting on your mask first. Are you
setting boundaries? Are you the light
and overflowing? What I am Sabrina
Shine Williams and I coach women who are
ready to play bigger, find their voice,
and become clear and confident enough to
shine authentically. Share below with me

(08:44):
which step are you at? Are you
at with minding your business? Are you at
step one? You're just getting ready to
put on your oxygen mask. You Step 2?
No, I'm I'm setting some boundaries. Or
maybe step three. I'm shining. Sabrina,
I'm shining the light. Everybody else,
it doesn't matter where you are. I'm just

(09:05):
curious where you are right now.
Don't forget to like and subscribe so
that you'll be aware when new episodes
come out. And follow me at Sabrina
Shine Williams on all social media
platforms. And you can listen to this
podcast at WWW.
Sabrina, www.

(09:26):
shinebrightwithsabrina.
com. That's www. shinebrightwith
sabrina. com. Go be the light.
Mind your own business.