June 17, 2025 • 18 mins
When we think of having a better mindset we might think in terms of always being positive. There is a little more to a growth mindset and deciding if you need a mindset reset is important.
First step to improving your mindset and gaining more confidence is to become aware of what your current thoughts and beliefs are. Sometimes these are holding you back. We have so many thoughts a day and we don't think about what we think about.
If mindset was simply being able to write down affirmations on a post it, affixing it to your bathroom mirror, and reading it over and over while brushing your teeth we would all be rich, famous, and in the best health of our lives. It's not that simple.
You have to believe what you are telling yourself. The mindset you adopt has to be believable to you. If you want better relationships, a higher paying job, or a fantastically fit body it requires a mindset of success.
A mindset shift happens when you take the time to identify what mindset you want. At times, it will take changing the way you interact with the world. If you complain it will require you to rewire your brain to stop complaining as much. If you think life is always a struggle it will require you imagine a world that isn't a struggle.
Mindset requires curiosity and you may need to enlist some help along the way. Listen to this episode for some mindset tricks, tips, and shifts that will help you live a life happier and healthier than ever.
Email me at heather@hcedwardscoaching.com.
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XOXO,
Heather
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:02):
If you're committed to staying where youare and doing what you've always been
doing, even though you're not happy, itmight be you That needs a mindset reset.
If you complain and you're defensive whenothers offer solutions, believing nothing
will work for you, even if it's worked forother people and finding all the reasons
you can't stop doing what you're doing.
(00:23):
You might need a mindset reset.
You're not.
Truly open to finding solutions.
You are staying in arelationship that isn't healthy.
You're staying in a job that isn't payingyou well, even though you have knowledge
and ability to get paid more or not.
Staying committed to becominga healthy version of yourself,
all those things could meanyou're ready for a mindset shift.
(00:47):
If you believe nothing ever goesright for your life or your life
is always a struggle, you oftenfeel hopeless and powerless.
You might need a mindset resetthis and so many other things.
Have you ever felt held back byself-doubt, whether it's speaking
up in a meeting or connectingwith others or simply just.
(01:08):
Believing in your own worth,well, you're not alone.
Welcome to the CrazyConfidence Coach Podcast.
I'm Heather Edwards, mastercertified life coach, and my goal
is to empower you to step into yourmost authentic, confident self.
Here you're going to discover practicalstrategies and powerful insights to
help you improve your communication,deepen those relationships,
(01:30):
and elevate your self-esteem.
And each week I'm gonna guide youthrough some actionable tips and
mindset shifts that are specificallydesigned to help you break free from
fear, show up boldly in every area ofyour life and build crazy confidence.
Are you ready to stop hidingin the shadows, playing small
and avoiding the spotlight?
Grab your favorite pen and anotebook and let's get to it.
(01:55):
When you hear people discussing mindsettricks, they say you have to be positive.
Just be positive andeverything will be better.
But having a growth mindset isgoing beyond just negativity.
When you complain, when you compareyourself to others, when you blame others,
when you don't have or get what youwant, focus on immediate gratification
(02:18):
or focus on what isn't working.
You will continue to find yourself.
Unhappy and dissatisfied.
So your attitudes and what youbelieve and think about yourself and
other people and how you interpretcircumstances, then the interactions,
all of that makes up your mindset.
The first.
(02:38):
Thing that you can do to improve yourmindset and gain more confidence is to
become more aware of what the thoughtsand beliefs you have, what they are.
So sometimes the thoughts and what youbelieve are holding you back, and then
they're just keeping you from being thebest, most confident version of you.
The other piece of it is, is thatit really can keep you in a state of
(02:59):
sabotaging yourself and your efforts.
Your thoughts can influence.
What your actions are, and then youractions directly impact your outcome.
If you're not getting the outcomeand the results in your life that
you'd really like, it's likely thatyou just have some thoughts and
beliefs that are leading you astray.
We have between 6,000 and60,000 thoughts per day.
(03:22):
For the most part, our thoughts are rapidand happen naturally without intention.
So in other words, we're just notthinking about what we're thinking about.
They just come naturally.
Your thoughts and interpretationsare a result of your experiences
and what you've been taught, or atleast a combination of that, and
it's completely impossible to manage.
(03:42):
All of that, all the thoughtsthat you have in a single day.
It's also impossible to captureall the thoughts you're having that
are limiting you or are negativeand that are preventing you from
doing better things in your life.
I would love to tell you thatall you have to do is repeat
positive thoughts and voila.
(04:02):
You have an amazing, positive mindset,and there's this idea that you can
write down positive thoughts on apost-it note, stick them to your mirror.
And repeat them, why you brush yourteeth, and eventually you'll just be this
different person with a different mindset.
And unfortunately, thatdoesn't always work.
And here's why.
(04:23):
If you don't believe the new positivethought you wrote down, you'll
never take ownership of it andyou'll see no significant difference
in your life from repeating it.
On a rare occasion, you might havesome success with this process, putting
the post-it up there and repeating it.
But as soon as the thought that you,the new thought you have is challenged,
(04:43):
or if life throws you something yourway, that interrupts that validity of
your new thought, it goes out the windowand you find yourself right back where
you started and searching for a wayto create that mindset that you want.
So for example.
If you write down the affirmativepositive statement, I'm a millionaire
and I can buy anything I want.
(05:05):
It sounds great, right?
It sounds positive, andit sounds affirmative.
And initially you may be motivated by thethought, but if you currently can't pay
your bills and you spend most of your dayhaving thoughts about how hard it is to
pay bills, you're struggling at your joband you're tired and exhausted from trying
to figure it all out, you're very likely.
(05:26):
Not to become a millionaire.
If you believe millionaires orpeople who have lots of money
are bad and they're selfish, youcertainly won't become one of them.
So our beliefs about ourselves andour ability to make money or have
better relationships or get a betterjob are tied heavily to our core
thoughts about us being able todo it and what it means to do it.
(05:49):
History guides our currentbeliefs and our thoughts.
If you've always made moneybased on hourly wages.
Or a fixed salary, it can be a difficultchallenge to see yourself as a person who
can break that money creation barrier.
So this week I had a discovery call withthis young woman who said three times in
our short conversation that she alwaysmakes stupid financial decisions, and her
(06:12):
family was absolutely right about her.
Her family didn't want her to takethe career path that she took due to
the money challenges they believedit would present, and she was
holding on to these borrowed beliefs.
That her family gave her, thatshe was living directly into
those beliefs about her choices.
So what I mean by that is this, thatshe believed her current challenge
(06:34):
of finances was due to the fact thatshe was stupid and that she wasn't
making the right decisions in her life.
Really and truly.
She just built up all thesewalls around what was.
Possible for her doing what shehad chosen to do as a career path.
What she chose to dowasn't a horrible thing.
(06:54):
I know many people in herchosen career path that are very
successful, making great money.
As I was listening to her tell herstories, I realized she had made
some amazing choices in her life.
That were out of the ordinaryand served her very well, and
she just couldn't see them.
She was criticizing herself, couldn't seea way out of her financial circumstance,
(07:15):
and she was making lots of excuseseach time I offered her something to
consider that would offer her somerelief financially and in her career.
So her case is very classic of havinga mindset block and needing some
mindset tricks to help her shift.
Because her thoughts currentlyabout her situation are absolutely
(07:37):
not gonna get her anywhere.
The mindset she's inright now is very stuck.
She kept asking me over andover what she should do.
She really was looking to meto make those choices for her.
And I realized that she just had severalmindset gaps that really need to be
filled, and ultimately she decidednot to work with me, which was fine.
(07:57):
Not a big deal.
I offer, you know, free discoverycall for that very reason.
But what I realized is I. Thisparticular situation, she had so
many places that I could help her.
So many places that she had mindset gapsand mindset resets would be very helpful
for her, and she was very resistant to it.
(08:19):
She had doubts thatanything would work for her.
She really had insecurities aroundher abilities or around her family,
and she really was trapped intobelieving that nothing could help her.
Here's what I want you to lookfor to determine if you too
might need a mindset reset.
If you see these behaviorsin yourself, it might be you.
(08:41):
If you're committed to stayingwhere you are and doing what you've
always been doing, even thoughyou're not happy, it might be you.
That needs a mindset reset Ifyou complain and you're defensive
when others offer solutions.
Believing nothing will work for you,even if it's worked for other people
and finding all the reasons youcan't stop doing what you're doing.
(09:02):
You might need a mindset reset.
You're not truly opento finding solutions.
You are staying in arelationship that isn't healthy.
You're staying in a job that isn'tpaying you well, even though you have
knowledge and ability to get paid more.
Or not.
Staying committed to becominga healthy version of yourself,
(09:22):
all those things could meanyou're ready for a mindset shift.
If you believe nothing ever goesright for your life or your life
is always a struggle, you oftenfeel hopeless and powerless.
You might need a mindset reset.
This and so many other thingsare absolutely red flags for you.
If you're in a place where you're askingother people what you should do, over
(09:45):
and over complaining, feeling lost orchaotic, most of the time it's just time
to rebuild the trust you have in yourself.
Reset your mindset andcreate more confidence.
You are absolutely always at alltimes capable of making decisions
in your life that will impactyour life in a positive way.
A quick and easy mindset habit to do istake five minutes a day, write out as many
(10:09):
of your thoughts about you and your lifeas possible, and then just pick one or
two thoughts that you can intentionallywork on, either for the day or for
the week, however you want to do it.
It's just intentionally going to workon the thoughts that you're having.
When you pick the thoughtsthat you wanna work on, you're
gonna ask yourself things like.
Is this thought trueor am I making excuses?
(10:30):
Am I being resistant to it somehow?
Am I doubting myself?
Is there something that I could do tochange my current mindset or belief?
If it's a negative mindset that'simpacting my life, is there a decision
I could make today that would change theresults or outcomes I'm currently having?
Is there a way to get somehelp addressing my mindset?
(10:52):
Can I find a friend, acolleague, a coach, or a mentor?
As a coach, I help you identifythose layers of doubts,
insecurities, resistance, andtriggers that are sabotaging you.
They are embedded in your mindsetand how you show up in the world.
What I do is I teach people howto identify and work on your.
(11:12):
Issues for yourself, because when youstay unaware or you allow yourself
to stay confused, it's impossibleto make changes in your life.
It's impossible to have abetter mindset if you don't even
know your mindset is broken.
The second part of addressing and buildinga strong mindset is reframing and managing
your mind around your specific issues.
(11:34):
In the coaching world, we talkabout challenging your thoughts
and learning to be uncomfortablebecause it's where the magic is.
Learning to redirect andmanage your mind is valuable.
It sounds weird, manage your mind, butit's exactly what I'm talking about.
Every time you change a complaintto find something positive or
(11:55):
find a solution, instead ofcomplaining, you become stronger.
Each time you realize you're beingresistant to change and explore what
it could look like to make changes, youbecome an advocate for possibilities
rather than choosing to stay stuck.
All of these little tweaks andthings that you can do will help you.
Build a better mindset.
(12:17):
Another fun way of strengtheningyour mindset is to work backwards.
This is my favoriteway to do mindset work.
Decide the mindset you'd liketo have, and then build that
mindset from the ground up.
Decide you're going to be aperson who is healthy and happy.
Ask yourself, what would ahealthy and happy person do?
How would a healthy and happy person act?
(12:37):
What kind of thoughtswould this person have?
What kind of actionsdoes this person take?
Then you go about working those thoughts,actions, and behaviors into your life.
At first, it's gonna feel.
Off.
It's not gonna feel great because you'renot used to being that person, but you
just keep tweaking and readjusting,especially if you're a person who
(13:00):
has always been unhappy and unfit.
Hopefully that's not the case.
This is just an example, let me tell you.
You can do it.
You can do whatever you want to.
Especially for me, I love doing the.
The ground up work.
You can do this with relationships.
You can decide today you wanna havea healthy, loving relationship.
This was me 15 years ago.
(13:21):
I had a breakup that was with aperson that was unhealthy, and the
relationship just wasn't the greatest.
What I ended up doing is I made alist of everything that I wanted
in my relationship, what I wantedto bring to the relationship, what
type of actions both partners wouldneed to make in the relationship.
How we can make it successful.
(13:42):
And then I put down all of thesetraits that I wanted and the person
that I would be married to one day.
And then I also made a list of thetraits I wanted to offer my partner.
So without all that time and effort thatI put into identifying what I wanted,
I didn't have the right mindset forfinding my right relationship before
(14:03):
I worked on my mindset I was dating.
Random guys, and I couldn'tfigure out why I wasn't happy.
As soon as I decided to have themindset of a person who was looking for
a healthy relationship and a specifictype of partner, dating became easy.
I stopped being sad or frustratedwhen the date wasn't great.
I became confident and securebecause I knew exactly what I was
(14:26):
looking for, and I knew exactly who.
I was and what I was offering andwhat I wanted my partner to offer me.
You may be sitting herethinking, oh, that's crazy.
Or you may be thinking, I'min a relationship already that
it isn't easy to get out of.
Maybe you're already marriedand you don't feel content.
My question to you would be this.
(14:47):
What type of mindset do youhave about your marriage?
Do you take responsibilityfor the health of relationship
or do you blame your partner?
Are you complaining all the time?
Are you being a nag?
Are you picking on them?
Are you finding ways tocontribute and make your partner
feel loved and appreciated?
Or are you constantly on the searchfor the things that aren't working?
(15:10):
There are so many waysthat we approach our lives.
That really matter.
The way we think about ourspouses, our jobs, our children,
our parents, our coworkers, thefood we eat, politics, all of it.
It all matters.
Your mindset is a set pointfor what your reality becomes.
So if you want to change yourlife, you absolutely have the
(15:32):
power to do that, but you have to.
Work at the mindset that you arebringing to whatever part of your
life that you want to change.
The quickest way to do that is decideyou're no longer going to live in the
chaos, overwhelm, drama, whatever, youknow, negative place you are in currently,
and begin working on it little by little.
(15:52):
Just decide that you're going to be thebest version of work, play, relationships,
whatever health, whatever it is.
Then start defining what that versionis and move toward that version.
Start with positive self-talk each day.
Identify positive things in yourlife, things that you like about you.
Identify what's really working inyour life, and then build from there.
(16:16):
Your mind will start to go to workto find what's amazing in your life.
Bust yourself when you're complaining.
If you're having a hard time with yourmindset reset, use this mindset trick.
Get super curious.
Do you remember Curious George?
He's my favorite.
He was the cartoon characterthat was a monkey and he would
go around just being curious.
(16:38):
He was sloppy and clumsy, buthe wasn't really worried about
what other people were thinking.
He is simply going around andexploring and questioning everything,
and that's what I, that I reallybelieve we should do with this.
Don't be afraid to ask why.
Why do you have your current mindset?
Would it be worth challengingyour current mindset?
(16:59):
What do you have to gain by changing yourmindset and what could be made easier by
cha challenging or changing your mindset?
When we are brave enough to ask whywe think the way we do and why we
currently function the way we do,it can give us this fresh outlook
about our lives and the people in it.
When we are willing to work on creatingstronger, healthier, and more supportive
(17:23):
thoughts and mindset, we set ourselves.
Up or success.
Thank you so much forhanging out with me today.
It has been a blast.
I would love for you to do me a hugefavor and either go leave a rating
or a review, and if you reallylove the podcast or you've learned
anything at all, please pass it on.
To a friend or a family member thatmight enjoy the podcast as well.
(17:45):
That's how I grow and that's how I'mable to continue bringing you content.
If you are interested in coaching, justgo to the crazy confidence coach.com.
You can sign up for afree discovery call there.
Thank you so much for being here.
I hope to see you next Tuesday so wecan build our crazy confidence together.
Love you big.
If you're committed to staying where youare and doing what you've always been
doing, even though you're not happy, itmight be you That needs a mindset reset.
If you complain and you're defensive whenothers offer solutions, believing nothing
will work for you, even if it's worked forother people and finding all the reasons
you can't stop doing what you're doing.
(00:23):
You might need a mindset reset.
You're not.
Truly open to finding solutions.
You are staying in arelationship that isn't healthy.
You're staying in a job that isn't payingyou well, even though you have knowledge
and ability to get paid more or not.
Staying committed to becominga healthy version of yourself,
all those things could meanyou're ready for a mindset shift.
(00:47):
If you believe nothing ever goesright for your life or your life
is always a struggle, you oftenfeel hopeless and powerless.
You might need a mindset resetthis and so many other things.
Have you ever felt held back byself-doubt, whether it's speaking
up in a meeting or connectingwith others or simply just.
(01:08):
Believing in your own worth,well, you're not alone.
Welcome to the CrazyConfidence Coach Podcast.
I'm Heather Edwards, mastercertified life coach, and my goal
is to empower you to step into yourmost authentic, confident self.
Here you're going to discover practicalstrategies and powerful insights to
help you improve your communication,deepen those relationships,
(01:30):
and elevate your self-esteem.
And each week I'm gonna guide youthrough some actionable tips and
mindset shifts that are specificallydesigned to help you break free from
fear, show up boldly in every area ofyour life and build crazy confidence.
Are you ready to stop hidingin the shadows, playing small
and avoiding the spotlight?
Grab your favorite pen and anotebook and let's get to it.
(01:55):
When you hear people discussing mindsettricks, they say you have to be positive.
Just be positive andeverything will be better.
But having a growth mindset isgoing beyond just negativity.
When you complain, when you compareyourself to others, when you blame others,
when you don't have or get what youwant, focus on immediate gratification
(02:18):
or focus on what isn't working.
You will continue to find yourself.
Unhappy and dissatisfied.
So your attitudes and what youbelieve and think about yourself and
other people and how you interpretcircumstances, then the interactions,
all of that makes up your mindset.
The first.
(02:38):
Thing that you can do to improve yourmindset and gain more confidence is to
become more aware of what the thoughtsand beliefs you have, what they are.
So sometimes the thoughts and what youbelieve are holding you back, and then
they're just keeping you from being thebest, most confident version of you.
The other piece of it is, is thatit really can keep you in a state of
(02:59):
sabotaging yourself and your efforts.
Your thoughts can influence.
What your actions are, and then youractions directly impact your outcome.
If you're not getting the outcomeand the results in your life that
you'd really like, it's likely thatyou just have some thoughts and
beliefs that are leading you astray.
We have between 6,000 and60,000 thoughts per day.
(03:22):
For the most part, our thoughts are rapidand happen naturally without intention.
So in other words, we're just notthinking about what we're thinking about.
They just come naturally.
Your thoughts and interpretationsare a result of your experiences
and what you've been taught, or atleast a combination of that, and
it's completely impossible to manage.
(03:42):
All of that, all the thoughtsthat you have in a single day.
It's also impossible to captureall the thoughts you're having that
are limiting you or are negativeand that are preventing you from
doing better things in your life.
I would love to tell you thatall you have to do is repeat
positive thoughts and voila.
(04:02):
You have an amazing, positive mindset,and there's this idea that you can
write down positive thoughts on apost-it note, stick them to your mirror.
And repeat them, why you brush yourteeth, and eventually you'll just be this
different person with a different mindset.
And unfortunately, thatdoesn't always work.
And here's why.
(04:23):
If you don't believe the new positivethought you wrote down, you'll
never take ownership of it andyou'll see no significant difference
in your life from repeating it.
On a rare occasion, you might havesome success with this process, putting
the post-it up there and repeating it.
But as soon as the thought that you,the new thought you have is challenged,
(04:43):
or if life throws you something yourway, that interrupts that validity of
your new thought, it goes out the windowand you find yourself right back where
you started and searching for a wayto create that mindset that you want.
So for example.
If you write down the affirmativepositive statement, I'm a millionaire
and I can buy anything I want.
(05:05):
It sounds great, right?
It sounds positive, andit sounds affirmative.
And initially you may be motivated by thethought, but if you currently can't pay
your bills and you spend most of your dayhaving thoughts about how hard it is to
pay bills, you're struggling at your joband you're tired and exhausted from trying
to figure it all out, you're very likely.
(05:26):
Not to become a millionaire.
If you believe millionaires orpeople who have lots of money
are bad and they're selfish, youcertainly won't become one of them.
So our beliefs about ourselves andour ability to make money or have
better relationships or get a betterjob are tied heavily to our core
thoughts about us being able todo it and what it means to do it.
(05:49):
History guides our currentbeliefs and our thoughts.
If you've always made moneybased on hourly wages.
Or a fixed salary, it can be a difficultchallenge to see yourself as a person who
can break that money creation barrier.
So this week I had a discovery call withthis young woman who said three times in
our short conversation that she alwaysmakes stupid financial decisions, and her
(06:12):
family was absolutely right about her.
Her family didn't want her to takethe career path that she took due to
the money challenges they believedit would present, and she was
holding on to these borrowed beliefs.
That her family gave her, thatshe was living directly into
those beliefs about her choices.
So what I mean by that is this, thatshe believed her current challenge
(06:34):
of finances was due to the fact thatshe was stupid and that she wasn't
making the right decisions in her life.
Really and truly.
She just built up all thesewalls around what was.
Possible for her doing what shehad chosen to do as a career path.
What she chose to dowasn't a horrible thing.
(06:54):
I know many people in herchosen career path that are very
successful, making great money.
As I was listening to her tell herstories, I realized she had made
some amazing choices in her life.
That were out of the ordinaryand served her very well, and
she just couldn't see them.
She was criticizing herself, couldn't seea way out of her financial circumstance,
(07:15):
and she was making lots of excuseseach time I offered her something to
consider that would offer her somerelief financially and in her career.
So her case is very classic of havinga mindset block and needing some
mindset tricks to help her shift.
Because her thoughts currentlyabout her situation are absolutely
(07:37):
not gonna get her anywhere.
The mindset she's inright now is very stuck.
She kept asking me over andover what she should do.
She really was looking to meto make those choices for her.
And I realized that she just had severalmindset gaps that really need to be
filled, and ultimately she decidednot to work with me, which was fine.
(07:57):
Not a big deal.
I offer, you know, free discoverycall for that very reason.
But what I realized is I. Thisparticular situation, she had so
many places that I could help her.
So many places that she had mindset gapsand mindset resets would be very helpful
for her, and she was very resistant to it.
(08:19):
She had doubts thatanything would work for her.
She really had insecurities aroundher abilities or around her family,
and she really was trapped intobelieving that nothing could help her.
Here's what I want you to lookfor to determine if you too
might need a mindset reset.
If you see these behaviorsin yourself, it might be you.
(08:41):
If you're committed to stayingwhere you are and doing what you've
always been doing, even thoughyou're not happy, it might be you.
That needs a mindset reset Ifyou complain and you're defensive
when others offer solutions.
Believing nothing will work for you,even if it's worked for other people
and finding all the reasons youcan't stop doing what you're doing.
(09:02):
You might need a mindset reset.
You're not truly opento finding solutions.
You are staying in arelationship that isn't healthy.
You're staying in a job that isn'tpaying you well, even though you have
knowledge and ability to get paid more.
Or not.
Staying committed to becominga healthy version of yourself,
(09:22):
all those things could meanyou're ready for a mindset shift.
If you believe nothing ever goesright for your life or your life
is always a struggle, you oftenfeel hopeless and powerless.
You might need a mindset reset.
This and so many other thingsare absolutely red flags for you.
If you're in a place where you're askingother people what you should do, over
(09:45):
and over complaining, feeling lost orchaotic, most of the time it's just time
to rebuild the trust you have in yourself.
Reset your mindset andcreate more confidence.
You are absolutely always at alltimes capable of making decisions
in your life that will impactyour life in a positive way.
A quick and easy mindset habit to do istake five minutes a day, write out as many
(10:09):
of your thoughts about you and your lifeas possible, and then just pick one or
two thoughts that you can intentionallywork on, either for the day or for
the week, however you want to do it.
It's just intentionally going to workon the thoughts that you're having.
When you pick the thoughtsthat you wanna work on, you're
gonna ask yourself things like.
Is this thought trueor am I making excuses?
(10:30):
Am I being resistant to it somehow?
Am I doubting myself?
Is there something that I could do tochange my current mindset or belief?
If it's a negative mindset that'simpacting my life, is there a decision
I could make today that would change theresults or outcomes I'm currently having?
Is there a way to get somehelp addressing my mindset?
(10:52):
Can I find a friend, acolleague, a coach, or a mentor?
As a coach, I help you identifythose layers of doubts,
insecurities, resistance, andtriggers that are sabotaging you.
They are embedded in your mindsetand how you show up in the world.
What I do is I teach people howto identify and work on your.
(11:12):
Issues for yourself, because when youstay unaware or you allow yourself
to stay confused, it's impossibleto make changes in your life.
It's impossible to have abetter mindset if you don't even
know your mindset is broken.
The second part of addressing and buildinga strong mindset is reframing and managing
your mind around your specific issues.
(11:34):
In the coaching world, we talkabout challenging your thoughts
and learning to be uncomfortablebecause it's where the magic is.
Learning to redirect andmanage your mind is valuable.
It sounds weird, manage your mind, butit's exactly what I'm talking about.
Every time you change a complaintto find something positive or
(11:55):
find a solution, instead ofcomplaining, you become stronger.
Each time you realize you're beingresistant to change and explore what
it could look like to make changes, youbecome an advocate for possibilities
rather than choosing to stay stuck.
All of these little tweaks andthings that you can do will help you.
Build a better mindset.
(12:17):
Another fun way of strengtheningyour mindset is to work backwards.
This is my favoriteway to do mindset work.
Decide the mindset you'd liketo have, and then build that
mindset from the ground up.
Decide you're going to be aperson who is healthy and happy.
Ask yourself, what would ahealthy and happy person do?
How would a healthy and happy person act?
(12:37):
What kind of thoughtswould this person have?
What kind of actionsdoes this person take?
Then you go about working those thoughts,actions, and behaviors into your life.
At first, it's gonna feel.
Off.
It's not gonna feel great because you'renot used to being that person, but you
just keep tweaking and readjusting,especially if you're a person who
(13:00):
has always been unhappy and unfit.
Hopefully that's not the case.
This is just an example, let me tell you.
You can do it.
You can do whatever you want to.
Especially for me, I love doing the.
The ground up work.
You can do this with relationships.
You can decide today you wanna havea healthy, loving relationship.
This was me 15 years ago.
(13:21):
I had a breakup that was with aperson that was unhealthy, and the
relationship just wasn't the greatest.
What I ended up doing is I made alist of everything that I wanted
in my relationship, what I wantedto bring to the relationship, what
type of actions both partners wouldneed to make in the relationship.
How we can make it successful.
(13:42):
And then I put down all of thesetraits that I wanted and the person
that I would be married to one day.
And then I also made a list of thetraits I wanted to offer my partner.
So without all that time and effort thatI put into identifying what I wanted,
I didn't have the right mindset forfinding my right relationship before
(14:03):
I worked on my mindset I was dating.
Random guys, and I couldn'tfigure out why I wasn't happy.
As soon as I decided to have themindset of a person who was looking for
a healthy relationship and a specifictype of partner, dating became easy.
I stopped being sad or frustratedwhen the date wasn't great.
I became confident and securebecause I knew exactly what I was
(14:26):
looking for, and I knew exactly who.
I was and what I was offering andwhat I wanted my partner to offer me.
You may be sitting herethinking, oh, that's crazy.
Or you may be thinking, I'min a relationship already that
it isn't easy to get out of.
Maybe you're already marriedand you don't feel content.
My question to you would be this.
(14:47):
What type of mindset do youhave about your marriage?
Do you take responsibilityfor the health of relationship
or do you blame your partner?
Are you complaining all the time?
Are you being a nag?
Are you picking on them?
Are you finding ways tocontribute and make your partner
feel loved and appreciated?
Or are you constantly on the searchfor the things that aren't working?
(15:10):
There are so many waysthat we approach our lives.
That really matter.
The way we think about ourspouses, our jobs, our children,
our parents, our coworkers, thefood we eat, politics, all of it.
It all matters.
Your mindset is a set pointfor what your reality becomes.
So if you want to change yourlife, you absolutely have the
(15:32):
power to do that, but you have to.
Work at the mindset that you arebringing to whatever part of your
life that you want to change.
The quickest way to do that is decideyou're no longer going to live in the
chaos, overwhelm, drama, whatever, youknow, negative place you are in currently,
and begin working on it little by little.
(15:52):
Just decide that you're going to be thebest version of work, play, relationships,
whatever health, whatever it is.
Then start defining what that versionis and move toward that version.
Start with positive self-talk each day.
Identify positive things in yourlife, things that you like about you.
Identify what's really working inyour life, and then build from there.
(16:16):
Your mind will start to go to workto find what's amazing in your life.
Bust yourself when you're complaining.
If you're having a hard time with yourmindset reset, use this mindset trick.
Get super curious.
Do you remember Curious George?
He's my favorite.
He was the cartoon characterthat was a monkey and he would
go around just being curious.
(16:38):
He was sloppy and clumsy, buthe wasn't really worried about
what other people were thinking.
He is simply going around andexploring and questioning everything,
and that's what I, that I reallybelieve we should do with this.
Don't be afraid to ask why.
Why do you have your current mindset?
Would it be worth challengingyour current mindset?
(16:59):
What do you have to gain by changing yourmindset and what could be made easier by
cha challenging or changing your mindset?
When we are brave enough to ask whywe think the way we do and why we
currently function the way we do,it can give us this fresh outlook
about our lives and the people in it.
When we are willing to work on creatingstronger, healthier, and more supportive
(17:23):
thoughts and mindset, we set ourselves.
Up or success.
Thank you so much forhanging out with me today.
It has been a blast.
I would love for you to do me a hugefavor and either go leave a rating
or a review, and if you reallylove the podcast or you've learned
anything at all, please pass it on.
To a friend or a family member thatmight enjoy the podcast as well.
(17:45):
That's how I grow and that's how I'mable to continue bringing you content.
If you are interested in coaching, justgo to the crazy confidence coach.com.
You can sign up for afree discovery call there.
Thank you so much for being here.
I hope to see you next Tuesday so wecan build our crazy confidence together.
Love you big.
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