December 31, 2024 • 13 mins
Overconfidence can be a silent saboteur, as I learned firsthand during a crucial game when my team’s winning streak came to a screeching halt. Join me, Coach Mikki, on 4thin1 Mindset, where I unpack this humbling experience and explore the fine line between confidence and cockiness in leadership. Through personal stories and real-world examples, we examine the pivotal role of mindset in fostering trust and building a positive team culture. Learn how true leadership not only involves self-reflection but also prioritizes collective success over individual glory, whether in the world of sports or business.
In this episode, we tackle the complexities of leadership, drawing insights from the strategies of an unconventional coach and the exemplary leadership style of NFL quarterback Patrick Mahomes. Discover how misguided tactics and arrogance can derail team performance, while genuine confidence can empower and inspire. We discuss how a leader should remain approachable and adapt to constantly changing environments, always learning and growing. Embrace challenges with confidence and vigor as we uncover the secrets to a strong start, a strong finish, and dominating the process in between.
Start Strong - Finish Strong! - Let's Go!
@4thand1Mindset
4th and 1 Mindset with Coach Mikki
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Okay, come on in, bring it in, bring it on, listen
up, listen up.
Hey, I'm Coach Mickey.
You're on 4thin1 Mindset Everyseason, as soon as I walk into
the locker room and I get theopportunity to address my team,
this is a topic that's reallyimportant and insightful, and I
like to start my season withthis, and I think this applies
(00:21):
not only to any kind of sportsorganization, but it also
applies to whether you are aleader, whether it's business,
as a player, as a person, andit's kind of self-reflection on
who are you and what are youpresenting when you are doing
things.
There's a fine line betweenbeing confident and cocky, and I
(00:45):
learned that firsthand, and Iwill tell you a story, and
definitely not one I'm proud of,but it definitely made me
realize that there is a huge,there's a fine line here, and
then, once you cross it, whatare you going to do with it?
We were a five and O season andwe were doing really, really
well, and at the time, the drumcorps from the band had offered
(01:08):
to do a full introduction wherethere was a ramp that went down
to our field, so we would leavethe locker room and then we'd
have to go down this ramp to godown onto the sidelines and then
onto the field.
We lined up like we usually do,and I usually have my guys line
up two by two as we go down asa unified team, and I'm usually
(01:28):
in the front, and then we have,you know, our other coaches, or
I put my captains up fronteither, or so the drum line
decided to give us this drumintroduction, to make this big
to-do as we came out on thefield.
So we get out on the field, wecome down, we're all, you know,
we're all puffed up, you know,ready to play, thinking we're
(01:48):
going to play and whatever wasgoing.
I guess we were overconfident,or were we cocky, because we got
down there and we got our asseskicked and it was the first
loss, and I'll tell you whatthat not only lit me up, but
also my guys.
I'll tell you what that notonly lit me up, but also my guys
.
That's when it hit me rightthen, on the field, there's a
(02:16):
big difference between beingconfident and cocky.
We had to do some soulsearching when we got back into
the locker room after that loss,because I could see it on their
faces.
That was the first thing I said.
I said did we go in thinking wewere going to win this game, or
knowing we were going to winthis game?
Or what mindset were we in whenwe walked out on that field?
So what's the differencebetween being confident and
(02:38):
cocky?
Well, I can tell you, as a coach, you know being confident, or
let's start with being cocky.
You know, and I have workedthrough the years with many of
these individuals and you cansee at the moment you step out
because it's not going to change.
You know what you're in for andyou got to learn how to deal
with it, and it's all about them.
(02:59):
You know a cocky coach, it'sall about them.
They're quick to dismissanybody's input or what they
think in regards to any kind ofplays, or talk over their
players, prioritize what's goodfor their team.
They don't build trust.
They want to just do whateverworks best for them.
They will do what's best forthemselves, or usually the
(03:20):
center of attention, and it justhurts the culture and everybody
around them.
And I've worked with it manytimes where I've had coaches
just do stupid things.
That I'm like okay, Iunderstand what you're trying to
do, but when you look at it inthe long run, is it really
helping the kids or are you justdoing this for yourself?
(03:41):
And I'll give you an example.
I worked on a team where thecoach wanted if you don't know
football, let me explain alittle.
There is certain numbers whenyou are running the ball to the
right and there's certainnumbers when you're running the
ball to the left.
And usually and I'm going tosay usually there are numbered
(04:02):
even and odd.
Most likely if you're runningto the right they're going to be
an even number, when you'rerunning to the left it's going
to be an odd number.
Well, I had a coach thatdecided to switch them and they
had some really good players anda lot of these kids were being
looked at for colleges.
And I kept saying to him I'mlike, why are you doing this?
What do you think is going tobe able to help us by switching
(04:28):
these numbers?
I said it's only going to beconfusing to the kids that have
been coming up through yourcoaching, from freshmen all the
way up to seniors that arepotentially going to go on to
college.
They're going to step out on afield.
Their coach is going to call aplay and majority I would say
99% of coaches usually have theeven numbers going right and the
(04:49):
odd numbers going left.
So why would you switch it?
He said, well, it's to confusethe defense.
And in my head I'm thinkingwell, you can pretty much figure
that out.
If you watch film, you knowwhich way they're going to go.
So it just didn't make anysense.
But that's okay.
Lo and behold, the coach wasfired because the season ended
up being really bad.
And I've seen it time and timeagain and that's not just one
(05:13):
season of coaching with cockycoaches, I've seen it over and
over again where, yeah, they'lldo okay, and then usually they
end up moving on to a differentlocation, or they get fired or
they quit because people aren'tworking with them.
And then you have the cockycoaches that are echo chambers,
where everybody will just tellthem they're doing great because
(05:33):
they want to keep their jobs.
But I'll tell you firsthand, Iwould much rather leave a team
and do something that was goingto be beneficial to the kids
than, yes, a coach all day, anyday, and, no, he's not doing the
right thing for their team.
So, anyway, that's what I feelabout.
So what makes a confident coachOkay?
So we kind of went off on thecockiness.
(05:53):
A confident coach comesprepared, they know the game
plan, they trust their team,they inspire the belief in the
players.
The confidence is aboutcreating an environment where
everyone knows that they cansucceed.
They put in effort, they'reprepared, they will do things
that they know are going tobuild confidence to each and
(06:16):
every one of these kids'abilities, and even when the
odds aren't in their favor.
And so I kind of realized thatwhen we lost that game.
I believe in my guys I always dobut there comes a point where
you become so confident that youbecome comfortable.
But there comes a point whereyou become so confident that you
become comfortable, and then Ithink it goes comfortable.
(06:38):
No, I'm going to say it goesconfident, comfortable and then
cocky.
And when you're in that grayarea of being comfortable,
that's where everything goessquirrely and haywire and you're
going to lead yourself intothings that you really don't
want to address.
And then, hopefully, you cancome back from it.
But if you catch it as a goodcoach and you realize, okay, we
got comfortable, we need to lookat this and now, no matter what
(07:02):
you're doing for your goals orwhatever's happening, once you
realize you've reached thatcomfortable zone, you need to
start revisiting what you needto do and get uncomfortable
again, because you have got togo back to being confident and
not allow comfort to be able tobring you into being cocky.
And I've seen it all through,not only through college, but
(07:24):
you see it in the NFL, wheresomebody just thinks they are
above and beyond everybody elseand it doesn't do good for their
team.
I think you have to have alittle bit to believe in
yourself, but not to the extremewhere it affects and makes it
miserable for everybody elsearound you and it's not going to
do something that's going tohelp everyone.
So when I look at that as aplayer, they have to be
(07:47):
confident in their abilities andthey want to focus on
contributing to the team andjust stay mentally tough even
when it's under pressure,because confidence shows up as
celebrating the team's success.
And I've seen I saw it in theNFL and I want to share a story.
When Patrick Mahomes got hurt acouple years ago and couldn't
play as the quarterback, I wouldwatch the game and one of the
(08:08):
things that really stood out tome as a really good quarterback
and player was that, even thoughhe was not in there playing
because he was hurt and was outfor quite a few games.
He was still up and down thatsideline and every time that
quarterback came off that hadtaken his place—and forgive me
because I don't remember hisname— he was on the sideline
(08:30):
helping him and they werewatching film and he was going
over and he was helping coachand he was bringing to the team
everything else to be able tohelp them win the game, even
though he wasn't the one outthere.
Good quarterbacks that take careof their offensive line.
And I'll tell you what if youwant to play well, you better
take care of your offensive line, because it really starts with
(08:51):
them.
What they do is what's going tomake you shine as a quarterback
.
But a lot of times thesequarterbacks get in their head
that they are it and everybodyelse is beneath them, and those
are the ones that are toxic toyour program.
If you've got a goodquarterback, there's somebody
who will be a leader and step upyour confident leaders.
They will empower others.
(09:12):
They will make tough decisions.
They'll remain approachable.
They'll be able to step up yourconfident leaders.
They will empower others.
They'll make tough decisions.
They'll remain approachable.
They'll be able to step up andhelp the guys and say, hey, I
don't know, but I'll find out.
They'll find weakness in thingsand then take the time to be
able to either present it to thecoaches or present it to other
people and help them with theirweaknesses and make them
stronger.
And they don't know everything.
(09:35):
They understand that there'salways learning.
They listen to their team.
They'll collaborate.
Now, I know I'm using a lot ofthis in football terms, but all
of this really can apply toanybody.
And I've seen it in thebusiness world.
I've seen it too many timeswhere you have got a leader, a
manager, a GM that is just sounapproachable and really has no
(10:01):
idea what's going on.
But because they're in thatposition, you know, do what I
say, don't do what I do.
And it's unfortunate becausethis is why a lot of
corporations and a lot ofcompanies really struggle,
because they have crossed theline of cockiness and confidence
.
And if you want to be confident,you got to bring to the table
(10:23):
something that is going to helpothers and be confident.
And being confident doesn'tmean you know everything.
Being confident means that youcan go and say, hey, I don't get
this, I don't understand this,I don't know.
Let me go and find out for youand I think there's a lot of
(10:43):
integrity in that.
Any coach that says, oh yeah, Iknow everything.
They're full of it becauseyou're always learning.
And the reason I say that isbecause every year, every season
, are always learning.
And the reason I say that isbecause every year, every season
, all the way up to the NFLlevel.
Now, grant, you're going to knowa lot because it's always going
to be changing and you've gotto understand the rules and
there's so many elements tobeing a head coach.
(11:05):
But what always changes is yourpersonnel.
When you've got personnel orpeople that come in that don't
know what they're doing or don'tunderstand or have to relearn
everything, that's when you haveto step up as a leader and be
confident that you can trainthem to be able to fill that
spot.
So if your main goal is foreverybody to succeed and to be
(11:29):
able to bring to the table thisextraordinary element of who you
are as a team and I'm talkingabout not only in football, but
in corporations, in life,wherever you're dealing with
people you have got to be ableto have the confidence to go.
Okay, this is the weakness.
This is what we have to figureout.
How are we going to get thereand how are we going to bring
(11:51):
this all together, and that iswhat's going to create the
success for you.
So I wanted you guys to knowthat and understand that, and I
know many of you have probablydone exactly what I've done.
But the most important thing isI learn from it and I keep
learning from from it and knowwhen you're presented with that
(12:15):
choice and you see it and whatdo you want to do with it.
So, all right, so bring it in.
Bring it in and I hope thishelped you with a little bit of
self-reflection and go out thereand be confident and let's
bring it in and take a break.
Get a break in, let's go, let'sgo.
Let's go.
Start strong and finish strongand dominate everything in
between.
I'm Coach Mickey, let's go.
Okay, come on in, bring it in, bring it on, listen
up, listen up.
Hey, I'm Coach Mickey.
You're on 4thin1 Mindset Everyseason, as soon as I walk into
the locker room and I get theopportunity to address my team,
this is a topic that's reallyimportant and insightful, and I
like to start my season withthis, and I think this applies
(00:21):
not only to any kind of sportsorganization, but it also
applies to whether you are aleader, whether it's business,
as a player, as a person, andit's kind of self-reflection on
who are you and what are youpresenting when you are doing
things.
There's a fine line betweenbeing confident and cocky, and I
(00:45):
learned that firsthand, and Iwill tell you a story, and
definitely not one I'm proud of,but it definitely made me
realize that there is a huge,there's a fine line here, and
then, once you cross it, whatare you going to do with it?
We were a five and O season andwe were doing really, really
well, and at the time, the drumcorps from the band had offered
(01:08):
to do a full introduction wherethere was a ramp that went down
to our field, so we would leavethe locker room and then we'd
have to go down this ramp to godown onto the sidelines and then
onto the field.
We lined up like we usually do,and I usually have my guys line
up two by two as we go down asa unified team, and I'm usually
(01:28):
in the front, and then we have,you know, our other coaches, or
I put my captains up fronteither, or so the drum line
decided to give us this drumintroduction, to make this big
to-do as we came out on thefield.
So we get out on the field, wecome down, we're all, you know,
we're all puffed up, you know,ready to play, thinking we're
(01:48):
going to play and whatever wasgoing.
I guess we were overconfident,or were we cocky, because we got
down there and we got our asseskicked and it was the first
loss, and I'll tell you whatthat not only lit me up, but
also my guys.
I'll tell you what that notonly lit me up, but also my guys
.
That's when it hit me rightthen, on the field, there's a
(02:16):
big difference between beingconfident and cocky.
We had to do some soulsearching when we got back into
the locker room after that loss,because I could see it on their
faces.
That was the first thing I said.
I said did we go in thinking wewere going to win this game, or
knowing we were going to winthis game?
Or what mindset were we in whenwe walked out on that field?
So what's the differencebetween being confident and
(02:38):
cocky?
Well, I can tell you, as a coach, you know being confident, or
let's start with being cocky.
You know, and I have workedthrough the years with many of
these individuals and you cansee at the moment you step out
because it's not going to change.
You know what you're in for andyou got to learn how to deal
with it, and it's all about them.
(02:59):
You know a cocky coach, it'sall about them.
They're quick to dismissanybody's input or what they
think in regards to any kind ofplays, or talk over their
players, prioritize what's goodfor their team.
They don't build trust.
They want to just do whateverworks best for them.
They will do what's best forthemselves, or usually the
(03:20):
center of attention, and it justhurts the culture and everybody
around them.
And I've worked with it manytimes where I've had coaches
just do stupid things.
That I'm like okay, Iunderstand what you're trying to
do, but when you look at it inthe long run, is it really
helping the kids or are you justdoing this for yourself?
(03:41):
And I'll give you an example.
I worked on a team where thecoach wanted if you don't know
football, let me explain alittle.
There is certain numbers whenyou are running the ball to the
right and there's certainnumbers when you're running the
ball to the left.
And usually and I'm going tosay usually there are numbered
(04:02):
even and odd.
Most likely if you're runningto the right they're going to be
an even number, when you'rerunning to the left it's going
to be an odd number.
Well, I had a coach thatdecided to switch them and they
had some really good players anda lot of these kids were being
looked at for colleges.
And I kept saying to him I'mlike, why are you doing this?
What do you think is going tobe able to help us by switching
(04:28):
these numbers?
I said it's only going to beconfusing to the kids that have
been coming up through yourcoaching, from freshmen all the
way up to seniors that arepotentially going to go on to
college.
They're going to step out on afield.
Their coach is going to call aplay and majority I would say
99% of coaches usually have theeven numbers going right and the
(04:49):
odd numbers going left.
So why would you switch it?
He said, well, it's to confusethe defense.
And in my head I'm thinkingwell, you can pretty much figure
that out.
If you watch film, you knowwhich way they're going to go.
So it just didn't make anysense.
But that's okay.
Lo and behold, the coach wasfired because the season ended
up being really bad.
And I've seen it time and timeagain and that's not just one
(05:13):
season of coaching with cockycoaches, I've seen it over and
over again where, yeah, they'lldo okay, and then usually they
end up moving on to a differentlocation, or they get fired or
they quit because people aren'tworking with them.
And then you have the cockycoaches that are echo chambers,
where everybody will just tellthem they're doing great because
(05:33):
they want to keep their jobs.
But I'll tell you firsthand, Iwould much rather leave a team
and do something that was goingto be beneficial to the kids
than, yes, a coach all day, anyday, and, no, he's not doing the
right thing for their team.
So, anyway, that's what I feelabout.
So what makes a confident coachOkay?
So we kind of went off on thecockiness.
(05:53):
A confident coach comesprepared, they know the game
plan, they trust their team,they inspire the belief in the
players.
The confidence is aboutcreating an environment where
everyone knows that they cansucceed.
They put in effort, they'reprepared, they will do things
that they know are going tobuild confidence to each and
(06:16):
every one of these kids'abilities, and even when the
odds aren't in their favor.
And so I kind of realized thatwhen we lost that game.
I believe in my guys I always dobut there comes a point where
you become so confident that youbecome comfortable.
But there comes a point whereyou become so confident that you
become comfortable, and then Ithink it goes comfortable.
(06:38):
No, I'm going to say it goesconfident, comfortable and then
cocky.
And when you're in that grayarea of being comfortable,
that's where everything goessquirrely and haywire and you're
going to lead yourself intothings that you really don't
want to address.
And then, hopefully, you cancome back from it.
But if you catch it as a goodcoach and you realize, okay, we
got comfortable, we need to lookat this and now, no matter what
(07:02):
you're doing for your goals orwhatever's happening, once you
realize you've reached thatcomfortable zone, you need to
start revisiting what you needto do and get uncomfortable
again, because you have got togo back to being confident and
not allow comfort to be able tobring you into being cocky.
And I've seen it all through,not only through college, but
(07:24):
you see it in the NFL, wheresomebody just thinks they are
above and beyond everybody elseand it doesn't do good for their
team.
I think you have to have alittle bit to believe in
yourself, but not to the extremewhere it affects and makes it
miserable for everybody elsearound you and it's not going to
do something that's going tohelp everyone.
So when I look at that as aplayer, they have to be
(07:47):
confident in their abilities andthey want to focus on
contributing to the team andjust stay mentally tough even
when it's under pressure,because confidence shows up as
celebrating the team's success.
And I've seen I saw it in theNFL and I want to share a story.
When Patrick Mahomes got hurt acouple years ago and couldn't
play as the quarterback, I wouldwatch the game and one of the
(08:08):
things that really stood out tome as a really good quarterback
and player was that, even thoughhe was not in there playing
because he was hurt and was outfor quite a few games.
He was still up and down thatsideline and every time that
quarterback came off that hadtaken his place—and forgive me
because I don't remember hisname— he was on the sideline
(08:30):
helping him and they werewatching film and he was going
over and he was helping coachand he was bringing to the team
everything else to be able tohelp them win the game, even
though he wasn't the one outthere.
Good quarterbacks that take careof their offensive line.
And I'll tell you what if youwant to play well, you better
take care of your offensive line, because it really starts with
(08:51):
them.
What they do is what's going tomake you shine as a quarterback
.
But a lot of times thesequarterbacks get in their head
that they are it and everybodyelse is beneath them, and those
are the ones that are toxic toyour program.
If you've got a goodquarterback, there's somebody
who will be a leader and step upyour confident leaders.
They will empower others.
(09:12):
They will make tough decisions.
They'll remain approachable.
They'll be able to step up yourconfident leaders.
They will empower others.
They'll make tough decisions.
They'll remain approachable.
They'll be able to step up andhelp the guys and say, hey, I
don't know, but I'll find out.
They'll find weakness in thingsand then take the time to be
able to either present it to thecoaches or present it to other
people and help them with theirweaknesses and make them
stronger.
And they don't know everything.
(09:35):
They understand that there'salways learning.
They listen to their team.
They'll collaborate.
Now, I know I'm using a lot ofthis in football terms, but all
of this really can apply toanybody.
And I've seen it in thebusiness world.
I've seen it too many timeswhere you have got a leader, a
manager, a GM that is just sounapproachable and really has no
(10:01):
idea what's going on.
But because they're in thatposition, you know, do what I
say, don't do what I do.
And it's unfortunate becausethis is why a lot of
corporations and a lot ofcompanies really struggle,
because they have crossed theline of cockiness and confidence
.
And if you want to be confident,you got to bring to the table
(10:23):
something that is going to helpothers and be confident.
And being confident doesn'tmean you know everything.
Being confident means that youcan go and say, hey, I don't get
this, I don't understand this,I don't know.
Let me go and find out for youand I think there's a lot of
(10:43):
integrity in that.
Any coach that says, oh yeah, Iknow everything.
They're full of it becauseyou're always learning.
And the reason I say that isbecause every year, every season
, are always learning.
And the reason I say that isbecause every year, every season
, all the way up to the NFLlevel.
Now, grant, you're going to knowa lot because it's always going
to be changing and you've gotto understand the rules and
there's so many elements tobeing a head coach.
(11:05):
But what always changes is yourpersonnel.
When you've got personnel orpeople that come in that don't
know what they're doing or don'tunderstand or have to relearn
everything, that's when you haveto step up as a leader and be
confident that you can trainthem to be able to fill that
spot.
So if your main goal is foreverybody to succeed and to be
(11:29):
able to bring to the table thisextraordinary element of who you
are as a team and I'm talkingabout not only in football, but
in corporations, in life,wherever you're dealing with
people you have got to be ableto have the confidence to go.
Okay, this is the weakness.
This is what we have to figureout.
How are we going to get thereand how are we going to bring
(11:51):
this all together, and that iswhat's going to create the
success for you.
So I wanted you guys to knowthat and understand that, and I
know many of you have probablydone exactly what I've done.
But the most important thing isI learn from it and I keep
learning from from it and knowwhen you're presented with that
(12:15):
choice and you see it and whatdo you want to do with it.
So, all right, so bring it in.
Bring it in and I hope thishelped you with a little bit of
self-reflection and go out thereand be confident and let's
bring it in and take a break.
Get a break in, let's go, let'sgo.
Let's go.
Start strong and finish strongand dominate everything in
between.
I'm Coach Mickey, let's go.
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