Self-Acceptance is the Rocket Fuel for Your Success

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Teru Nakashima delivers a powerful, transformative lecture on the profound connection between self-acceptance and achievement. As founder of Japan's Self-Acceptance Academy, Nakashima vulnerably shares how he emerged from spending a decade as a hikikomori (in severe social withdrawal) to discover universal principles of success rooted in authentic self-acceptance.

The lecture dismantles common misconceptions about authenticity, revealing that your true self isn't singular but multifaceted—you can be analytical professionally, playful with children, and contemplative spiritually without compromising authenticity. Using the vivid metaphor of a tree, Nakashima illustrates six essential elements of self-acceptance: self-worth (roots), self-acceptance (trunk), self-efficacy (branches), self-reliance (leaves), self-determination (flowers), and self-usefulness (fruits).

Delving into success psychology, Nakashima presents three critical principles: harnessing intuition as your inner compass, understanding that action precedes confidence (not vice versa), and learning from failure without letting it define your identity. These principles come alive through compelling examples including a professional golfer who improved dramatically by trusting her intuition, Edison's 10,000 attempts, and a figure skater who overcame trauma through visualization. Most practically, Nakashima shares his seven-step framework for achievement and introduces the powerful technique of using present perfect tense affirmations ("I have done it") to create completion images that propel you toward success.

Whether you're seeking to achieve specific goals, solve persistent problems, explore possibilities, or create systematic growth, this lecture offers actionable strategies grounded in the understanding that your inherent worth exists simply because you exist. The most successful people aren't those who never experience doubt—they're those who continue taking action despite challenges, guided by genuine self-acceptance and clear vision.

Teru Nakashima, All about Self-esteem

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
The Path to Success Through Self-Acceptance.
Teru Nakashima's First USLecture Introduction Warm
Greeting to Audience.

Speaker 2 (00:14):
Good afternoon everyone.
I am truly honored to bestanding before you today.
My name is Teru Nakashima,founder and representative of
the Self-Acceptance Academy inJapan.
This is my first lecture in theUnited States and I cannot
express how grateful I am forthis opportunity to share my
message with you.
Before we begin our journeytogether today, I'd like to

(00:37):
share something personal withyou.
Between the ages of 25 and 35, Ispent 10 years as a hikikomori,
a term that describes severesocial withdrawal.
For a decade, I rarely left myhome.
During that difficult time, aCEO of a major company would

(00:59):
visit me every six months,offering encouragement and
support, every six months,offering encouragement and
support.
His belief in me, even when Icouldn't believe in myself,
planted a seed that eventuallygrew into my life's work.
Today, I want to plant similarseeds with you, whether you're
here to achieve specific goals,solve persistent problems in

(01:21):
your life, explore newpossibilities or create
step-by-step systems for growth.
My promise is that you'll leavewith practical tools to enhance
your self-acceptance andaccelerate your path to success.
In the next 45 minutes, we'llexplore the essence of
self-acceptance, the psychologybehind success, a proven

(01:44):
seven-step framework for goalachievement On practical
affirmations you can implementimmediately.
Let's begin this transformativejourney together.

Speaker 1 (01:58):
Part 1.
The Essence of Self-Acceptance.

Speaker 2 (02:04):
What exactly is self-acceptance At its core is
the foundation upon which allachievement, happiness and
resilience is built.
For those of you focused onachieving specific outcomes,
self-acceptance is the rocketfuel for your success.
When you truly accept yourself,you unlock extraordinary energy
and focus that propels youtoward your goals.

(02:25):
Research consistently showsthat individuals with high
self-acceptance achieve theirobjectives faster and experience
greater satisfaction uponreaching them.
For those seeking to solvechallenges in your life.
For those seeking to solvechallenges in your life, low

(02:56):
self-acceptance often manifestsas procrastination,
self-sabotage and persistentnegative self-talk.
By addressing the root causeyour relationship with yourself
many problems that seemedinsurmountable begin to dissolve
.
But here's something crucialabout self-acceptance that many
misunderstand being yourauthentic self doesn't mean
having just one fixed identity.
For the creative thinkers whovalue options and possibilities,

(03:18):
true self-acceptance embracesthe multifaceted nature of who
you are.
You might be analytical in yourprofessional role, playful with
your children.
True self-acceptance embracesthe multifaceted nature of who
you are.
You might be analytical in yourprofessional role, playful with
your children, contemplative inyour spiritual practice and
passionate in your relationships.
All these versions of you areauthentic.

(03:40):
Self-acceptance means embracingthis rich diversity within
yourself.
For those who appreciate clearprocesses and step-by-step
approaches, finding yourauthentic self isn't about a
dramatic revelation.
It's a systematic journey ofsmall discoveries.
Each day you can take one steptoward greater self-knowledge by

(04:02):
observing yourself withoutjudgment and noting when you
feel most energized and at peace.
I like to illustrateself-acceptance using the
metaphor of a tree.
Like a tree with its roots,trunk, branches, leaves, flowers
and fruits, trueself-acceptance has six
essential elements Self-worthroots the fundamental belief

(04:23):
that you matter.
Self-worth roots thefundamental belief that you
matter.
Self-acceptance.
Trunk, embracing all aspects ofyourself.
Self-efficacy branches beliefin your ability to affect change
.
Self-reliance lives.
Trust in your own judgment.
Self-determination.
Flowers taking ownership ofyour choices.

(04:45):
Self-usefulness.
Fruits contributing value toothers.
Just as a tree needs all thesecomponents to thrive, so do we
need all these aspects ofself-acceptance to experience
true success and fulfillment.

Speaker 1 (05:03):
Part 2.
The Psychology of Success.

Speaker 2 (05:06):
Now let's explore how self-acceptance transforms into
tangible success by examiningthree critical psychological
principles.
Intuition your inner compass.
For those focused on achievinggoals, your intuition can be
your greatest ally, a shortcutto success that bypasses lengthy

(05:29):
analytical processes.
When you feel that spark ofexcitement about a particular
direction, pay attention.
This is often your subconsciousrecognizing an opportunity
before your conscious mind canarticulate it.
I worked with a professionalgolfer who learned to trust that

(05:52):
subtle feeling of rightnessbefore each swing.
By honoring this intuitionrather than overthinking, her
performance improveddramatically.
For problem solvers, be cautiousof intuitive impulses fueled by
anger, jealousy or fear.
Not all intuitive hits arecreated equal.
The key distinction, askyourself Is this intuition

(06:16):
arising from my high self orfrom my reactive emotions?
The wisdom lies in knowing whento act immediately on intuition
and when to pause.
As I often say to my clients, Itrust my intuition so deeply
that sometimes I choose to waiton it.
This paradoxical approach hassaved me from countless missteps

(06:39):
.
The primacy of action For thosewho value options and
possibilities.
There are infinite pathways tosuccess, but they all share one
common element action.
Many of us believe we must feelconfident before acting, but
this is backward thinking.
Thomas Edison didn't succeedbecause he felt confident before

(07:03):
each attempt.
He succeeded because he tookaction 10,000 times despite
uncertainty.
He succeeded because he tookaction 10,000 times despite
uncertainty.
Similarly, legendaryentrepreneurs like Steve Jobs
and Elon Musk have repeatedlyemphasized that their success
came not from unwaveringconfidence, but from willingness
to act despite profound doubts.

(07:24):
For those who prefer structuredapproaches, start with small,
manageable actions.
Success is rarely the result ofone dramatic leap, but rather a
series of small stepsconsistently taken.
Begin with the tiniest possibleaction toward your goal today,

(07:46):
even if it's just five minutesof focused effort.
Even if it's just five minutesof focused effort.
One of my clients, a successfulauthor who suffered from severe
writer's block, overcame it bycommitting to write just one
sentence per day.
This minimal commitmentbypassed her resistance and
often led to hours of productivewriting once she got started,

(08:09):
learning from failure and tryingagain.
We all experience failure, butthose who succeed don't allow
those failures to define theirself-image.
When you experience a setback,your brain creates a memory that
links your identity to thatfailure.
This is why many people repeatthe same mistakes.

(08:29):
They are unconsciouslyreinforcing a negative
self-concept.
Here's a powerful techniquewhen you recall a past failure,
consciously reimagine it withyour desired outcome.
Visualize yourself succeedingbrilliantly in that exact
scenario.
Do this repeatedly, almost likeoverwriting the memory.

(08:53):
This isn't mere fantasy.
It's reprogramming your brain'sexpectations and self-image.
A figure skater I worked withused this technique to overcome
a traumatic fall duringcompetition.
By visualizing a perfectlanding hundreds of times, she
not only healed psychologicallybut returned to win her next
competition.

(09:22):
Now let's get practical with acomprehensive framework that
incorporates everything we'vediscussed into a systematic
approach for success Foroutcome-focused individuals.
This framework begins and endswith clarity of purpose.
What specifically do you wantto achieve?
Why is it meaningful to you?
The more vivid and compellingyour vision, the more motivated

(09:45):
you'll remain through challengesFor problem solvers.
Steps three and four of thisframework monitoring progress
and analyzing current conditionswill especially resonate with
you.
These steps help identifyobstacles before they become
insurmountable.
Here are the seven stepsClarify your purpose.

(10:09):
Determine what you want toachieve and why it matters
deeply to you.
Set specific goals.
Define concrete targets withtimelines, numbers and action
plans.
Monitor progress Objectively.
Track your advancement withoutemotional judgment.
Analyze current conditions.
Use quantitative analysis tounderstand your situation

(10:31):
clearly.
Develop a plan.
Create short-term objectivesEvery two to three months with
specific actions.
Seek support.
Identify your strengths andweaknesses, then gather the
necessary support, review andreflect, document challenges,
processes and obstacles at eachsmall step.

(10:51):
For those who value variousoptions, step five developing a
plan should include multiplepathways to your goal.
Always have plans B and C ready, knowing that flexibility is a
strength, not a sign of weakness, for process-oriented
individuals.
You'll appreciate thesystematic progression of these

(11:14):
steps.
Follow them sequentially andyou'll build momentum.
Naturally, I've seen thisframework transform businesses,
athletic careers and personalrelationships.
Transform businesses, athleticcareers and personal
relationships.
An American executive I coachedused this system to revitalize
a struggling division, turningit into his company's most

(11:35):
profitable unit within 18 months.
There's something else I'veobserved repeatedly when you
commit fully to your goals andtake consistent action, the
universe seems to conspire tohelp you.
You'll, coincidentally,discover exactly the information
you need, or happen to meetsomeone who provides a crucial

(11:59):
connection.
This isn't mystical thinking.
It's your reticular activatingsystem, the part of your brain
that filters informationaligning with your conscious
objectives.

Speaker 1 (12:13):
Part 4.
Practical Affirmations and NextSteps.

Speaker 2 (12:19):
Let me share one of the most powerful yet simple
tools for buildingself-acceptance and accelerating
success Affirmations.
In the present perfect tense,the most effective phrase I've
found is surprisingly simple Ihave done it.
Dekichata in Japanese whenfacing a challenge, don't say I

(12:41):
will succeed or even I amsucceeding.
Don't say I will succeed oreven I am succeeding.
Instead, tell yourself I'vealready succeeded at this.
This present perfect tensecreates a powerful completion
image in your mind.
Before an importantpresentation, say I've nailed
that presentation.
Before a difficult conversationI've handled that beautifully.

(13:02):
Before a major project I'vecompleted that project
successfully.
This approach works for allpersonality types.
For goal achievers, thistechnique creates a clear target
state for your subconscious toaim toward.
For problem solvers, thisreframes challenges as already

(13:23):
resolved, reducing anxiety andenabling clearer thinking.
For possibility explorers,these affirmations open your
mind to new approaches byassuming success is already
accomplished.
For process followers, thepresent perfect tense implies
that a complete process hasalready occurred, priming your

(13:43):
mind to recreate that process inreality.
As we conclude, I want to offerthree specific actions you can
take immediately.
Choose one area where you'dlike to increase your
self-acceptance.
Begin saying I have completelyaccepted myself in this area,
three times each morning andevening.
Identify a past failure thatstill affects you.

(14:06):
Spend five minutes dailyreimagining it as a spectacular
success.
Select one goal and apply thefirst two steps of our framework
.
Clarify your purpose and set aspecific goal.
Write it down before you sleeptonight.
Remember you don't need to feelconfident to begin.

(14:26):
You just need to take thatfirst small step.

Speaker 1 (14:31):
Conclusion.

Speaker 2 (14:34):
My journey from a decade of isolation to standing
before you today demonstratesthat transformation is always
possible.
The seeds of self-acceptanceand success exist within each of
you.
They simply need nurturing togrow.
As Ralph Waldo Emerson wiselynoted, every person has inherent
worth.

(14:54):
Your value isn't determined byothers' opinions, your
accomplishments or your mistakes.
It exists simply because youexist.
I'll leave you with thisthought the most successful
people aren't those who neverexperience failure or self-doubt
.
They're those who continuetaking action despite these
challenges, guided by genuineself-acceptance and a clear

(15:18):
vision of their goals.
Thank you for your attentiontoday.
I'm excited to see how you'llapply these principles to create
your own unique success story.