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August 8, 2025 59 mins

⚠️ Content Warning: This episode includes discussion of self-harm and emotional distress. Please take care when listening.

Disclaimer: This conversation is not a substitute for therapy or professional mental health care. If you’re struggling, please reach out to a licensed provider or a crisis support line in your area. In the U.S., you can call or text 988 for immediate, free, 24/7 support.

In this deeply honest episode of Bariatric Mindset Success, Dr. Kristin Lloyd is joined by Bariatric Mindset Coach Frances Vogel to explore the raw and often-overlooked reality of identity transformation after weight loss surgery.

Together, they unpack the emotional unraveling that comes with shedding not just pounds — but past versions of yourself.

Kristin shares how losing 150 pounds led to unexpected emotional fallout, the impact on motherhood, marriage, and self-worth, and how living in her parents’ basement during a personal rock bottom moment sparked a powerful rebirth that led to the creation of Bariatric Mindset®.

They dive into:

* How childhood trauma shapes identity and weight struggles

* Why people-pleasing intensifies after surgery (and how to break free)

* Navigating emotional transitions and hormonal shifts

* Building new support systems that don’t enable old habits

* How to rebuild your self-image beyond numbers, roles, or expectations

This episode is a powerful reminder: weight loss doesn’t erase your pain — it reveals what’s still unhealed.

If you've ever asked yourself, “Who am I now?” — this conversation will speak directly to your soul.

Chapters

00:00:00 - Navigating Identity After Bariatric Surgery

00:02:16 - Rediscovering Identity After Weight Loss

00:05:10 - Journey of Weight Loss and Identity

00:10:34 - Struggles with Identity and Mental Health

00:14:02 - Identity Transformation After Surgery

00:19:59 - Finding Identity as a New Mom

00:22:35 - Struggles with Identity and Support

00:26:19 - Finding Voice and Identity Transformation

00:32:46 - Navigating Life After Bariatric Surgery

00:35:45 - Identity Beyond Body Image

00:38:56 - Embracing Identity Shifts in Life

00:41:05 - Coping with Life's Unexpected Changes

00:43:24 - Exploring Identity After Bariatric Surgery

00:48:10 - Exploring Personal Values and Identity

00:51:06 - Embracing Curiosity Over Judgment

00:53:46 - Embracing Your Main Character Energy

Key Takeaways

* Losing weight doesn’t fix your identity — it forces you to face it. The real transformation begins after the scale changes, when you're left asking, “Who am I now?”

* Healing your self-worth requires more than a smaller body — it takes emotional excavation. Shedding pounds doesn’t automatically shed the shame, the trauma, or the people-pleasing patterns.

* True success isn’t just about how you look — it’s about how deeply you know yourself. Self-acceptance is holistic: mind, body, nervous system, and soul.

* The wrong people can keep you stuck in the old story. Creating a supportive community isn’t optional — it’s survival for your new identity.

* Rock bottom isn’t the end — it’s the start of your rebirth. When everything falls apart, it’s an invitation to rewrite who you are on your terms.



Get full access to Bariatric Mindset at bariatricmindset.substack.com/subscribe
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