What if your body’s breakdown isn’t a setback—but a sacred initiation?
In this deeply embodied conversation, I’m joined by Staci Bennett, founder of The Embodied Collective, breathwork facilitator, Reiki Master, and sacred rebel—who recently experienced a profound awakening after breaking her ankle in Mount Shasta. But this isn’t just about physical recovery. It’s about what happens when your nervous system slows you down—and your soul finally gets a word in.
We explore:
💥 How trauma stored in the nervous system can manifest as sudden injury or symptoms
🦴 The psychosomatic root of injury and what it means to break down at the foundation
🔥 How healing the wounded masculine is often a nervous system reckoning
🛑 Why the body’s forced stillness can unlock emotional patterns that talking never touched
💔 The fear of unconditional love and what it really means to receive without earning
🌿 Staci’s journey through pain, breath, plant medicine, Akashic Records, and inner child work
🌀 And what it means to walk again—not just physically, but metaphorically
Whether you’re navigating burnout, chronic symptoms, or your own sacred pause—this episode is your reminder that sometimes the most powerful healing comes when everything…stops.
Connect with Staci Bennett:
Instagram: @smlbennett
Facebook: The Embodied Collective
Website (coming soon): www.theembodiedcollective.com
🔗 Listen now on Apple, Spotify, or your favorite platform
❤️ If this episode resonated, share it and leave a review. Healing is a collective remembering.
🔗 CONNECT WITH LAUREN MICHELLE JEWEL
✨ Instagram → @laurenmichellejewel & Lauren's Facebook
💌 Join the Embody This Collective → Join Here
🌐 Website + Work With Me → https://msha.ke/laurenjewel
🎁 Free Resources → Grab All My Freebies
🎙️ Podcast Hashtag → #EmbodyThisPodcast
💬 DM me on Instagram and tell me what resonated most with you from this episode.
📣 Share the show and tag me so more women can reclaim their body, identity, and f*cking life.
⚠️ Disclaimer:
This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to diagnose, treat, or replace professional medical advice or mental health care. Always consult with a qualified healthcare provider before making any changes to your health practices.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Audio Only - All Participan (00:02):
The body is not less than the soul,
and the further up is in higher.
It's actually deeper in.
I heard those words recently,and something in me cracked wide
open because for far too longwe've been fed the myth that
healing and spirituality liveabove us somewhere outside the
mess.
We've been taught to chase thelight, to bypass the pain, to
(00:23):
transcend the body, and thencall it ascension.
But what I know in my bones isthat the soul doesn't wanna
float above life or the body.
It wants to feel it.
It wants to root in to livethrough the body, not in spite
of it.
And that's exactly where we'regoing in today's conversation.
(00:43):
This episode is an invitation tostop seeing physical symptoms as
setbacks and start honoring themas sacred stops to stop trying
to get over it and instead ask.
What is this moment trying toroot me into?
My guest today is Stacy Bennett.
She's the founder of theEmbodied Collective, a
breathwork facilitator, a soundhealer, a reiki master, and a
(01:06):
sacred rebel who has walked thepath of recovery, emotional
reclamation, and spiritualgrounding.
And right now she's deep in it,healing from a broken ankle, not
just physically, but spirituallyand psychosomatically.
Welcome to Embody this, the NOBS Healing podcast for women who
are done playing small.
(01:27):
I'm Lauren Michelle Jewel, asingle sober business owning
badass who has been humbled ashell by healing.
But I'm not just someone who'slived it.
I've studied it, coached it, andhelped women walk through it for
over seven years in mind, bodyhealth, gut brain science, and
nervous system healing.
I've worked with women who havetried everything, therapy,
(01:49):
diets, supplements, self-helpwork, but still feel
disconnected from their bodies,their health, and their truth.
Because here's the thing,healing isn't a trend.
It's not aesthetic.
It's not an identity.
Healing is embodied, and let mebe real with you, it's hard as
fuck and it's also rewarding asfuck.
(02:11):
I know because I've lived it.
And along the way I realizedsomething.
Modern healing methods arefailing us.
Everything is compartmentalized.
Go to therapy.
They say, take the supplements,do the inner work, but no one
teaches you how to actuallyintegrate it.
All this show is for you ifyou're ready to rethink healing.
(02:34):
It's not about being perfect,being a wellness influencer or
having a PhD in biohacking.
It's about undoing, unlearning,and finally coming home to
yourself.
Quick disclaimer, this podcastis for educational purposes
only.
It's here to expand your mind,challenge old narratives, and
empower you with knowledge.
(02:55):
It's not a replacement formedical advice.
Always consult a professionalwhen making health decisions.
If this episode hits home,follow the share, rate it,
review it, share it with someonewho needs to hear it, because
you never know whose life youmight change.
Now let's fucking go.
Audio Only - All Participa (03:14):
This is not a story about injury.
It's a story about what happenswhen life forces you to pause
when your forward motion stops,and the only direction left is
to go inward.
We'll be talking about what itmeans to surrender when your
nervous system is wired to dofix and achieve the grief of
unmet timelines and identities.
We've outgrown the body's way ofspeaking truth when the mind
(03:37):
tries to outrun it.
How pain breakdown and stillnessare often the exact portals to
embodiment.
So if you've ever felt betrayedby your body, if you've ever
judged your symptoms instead oflistening to them, and if you've
ever felt like healing washappening to you instead of
through you, then this one's foryou because healing isn't about
(03:57):
getting back to who you were.
It's about descending into whoyou're here to become.
So let's get into it.
Welcome, Stacy.
I'm so fucking excited to diveinto this conversation with you.
How you doing?
Ooh.
Oh my gosh.
That that took me back, like tothe beginning of this journey,
and I have tears already.
Just I thinking of those veryfirst days and all of that, all
(04:22):
of the, everything that you justsaid, it was good.
We're done.
The show's over to hear.
That was perfect.
There we go.
I know.
It's my favorite thing to do isto write these intros to honor
the guests and then also toreally.
Speak to the, the energetics ofhow this call is gonna go.
And you are such a magical humanbeing who I've just met honestly
(04:46):
a couple months ago, but itfeels like we've known each
other actually a couple year agoor so.
But it feels like we've knowneach other forever.
And when we met, we both werelike, we met for a reason.
Yeah, we don't know why yet, buthere we are, so I know I wanted
to get you onto this podcastprior to the injury, but.
(05:06):
The moment that I saw thathappening, and like I told you
before this call and the momentthat it came through me, I think
I was driving where I was like,this is a perfect conversation
to have for not only you, butfor others to be like, listen,
these moments in our life wherethey really feel like they're.
Stopping everything in yourtracks and causing you to be
(05:29):
confronted by everything thatwas no longer serving you.
This is a perfect conversationto have.
So seriously.
Welcome in.
I'll let you get your bearings,you know your bearings here, but
why don't you tell us a littlebit about yourself first before
we get into the story of thiswhole conversation and kind of
tell us a little bit about whoStacy is.
(05:52):
Whew.
That's the hardest question.
Oh my gosh, I, you didn't warnme about this question.
I am, I'm a woman who islearning to slow the fuck down.
I know that for sure right now.
I'm a personal chef.
I'm a, like you named off Reikisound breath.
Getting into all of it, I'm amom of three boys, a wife of 20
(06:15):
years.
And just this soul that is, likeyou said, just learning to feel
into her body.
Someone who ran from her bodyher whole entire life.
You really got me with that inthe beginning.
Like I just, I have to say thatI just felt that like the soul
doesn't wanna live outside.
It wants to be in and feel andgo through all of that.
(06:36):
And that really, I felt thatlike really emotionally, really
strong.
Not even from the accident butthat definitely, that hit a lot.
But just to now think who I amand somebody that has really
done her best to avoid the bodythat she's given.
And one of the many things,learning from this, having to
(06:58):
feel into the pain, breathe intothe pain instead of trying to
avoid the pain that was onsetfrom falling but just even just
learning to live and love andfeel into this body that.
I wanted, right?
Like we wanted to come to thistime and this space, like our
(07:20):
soul, all our soul ever wantedwas a body.
And I got one and all I've donemy whole life is just abuse and
neglect and unlove and mistreat.
I'm definitely learning.
That's not the way, especiallyto enlightenment or to enjoy
this time on earth.
Like I, this is what I wantedand this is what I got.
(07:42):
And just to be grateful andappreciative and feel all the
blessings of being who I am inthis body that I've been given
in this.
That's so beautiful.
What a beautiful realization.
'cause I think I said somethingyesterday.
It was like the soul came hereto be in the body because
without the body, the soul can'tfeel.
(08:04):
And that's like the whole point.
It's to feel all of it.
And we're learning that, right?
We've all been taught not tofeel certain emotions.
We've been taught to really likediscipline the body, to look a
certain way, to shame the body,to quiet the body.
But the whole point is feelingto live in, to experience
consciousness within the biologyof this body and.
(08:27):
That realization in itself isjust super profound.
I had it, I've known it, but it.
To hear it.
I was listening to somethingyesterday.
It's where that kind of gotinspired from that intro where I
was like, this is it.
This is the, it's not the hero'sjourney, but this is the
heroine's journey, it's the theopposite of the hero's journey
where it's about conquering andproving and ascending.
(08:49):
And the heroine's journey ismore about remembering,
releasing, reclaiming, androoting back in and really
allowing ourselves to just.
Transcend what has been densewithin our body to learn from
the lessons, to experienceeverything that we've gone
through, and seeing it as a giftrather than, a punishment.
(09:10):
Yeah.
Tell me a little bit aboutright, like in the har Heroin's
journey, there's always like theseparation from the old self,
the fall, the break.
So within my work with thepsychosomatic work, a lot of
times what I'll do withsymptoms, injury, muscular
disease.
We always ask what was going onbefore the injury.
(09:32):
So where were you at before thisinjury?
And if you can think back of notonly physically, but like
emotionally and mentally, wherewere you at?
I was doing really well,actually.
Which it was a big thing that Idwelled on like I was doing.
Really good.
I had been, I had just gotten agmap test done for my stomach
(09:56):
and so I, my vitamins were onpoint of everything that I
needed to take to clear, likeleaky gut things and what is it
called?
The estrogen recycling, likejust things that were going on
in detoxification.
Yes, I was doing all of that andjust eating a very, clean diet.
But I was, still thinking likelearning to.
(10:16):
Appreciate food and, not deprivemyself, but I was eating to
nourish my body as the goddessthat I am.
Let's really feed you for loveand purpose and not deprive you
like a diet.
I've been on a diet since I wasin the third grade, so it was
like, I didn't wanna do thatanymore.
My practice is going good.
I'm, hosting classes.
(10:37):
I have a retreat next month inAugust that I had, have
scheduled and, just differentclasses that I've been doing.
I was on, I had a lot ofmomentum and things that were
doing good.
I'm like, okay, like I'm on thistrack and everything's going
really well.
June was a huge month.
My husband and I werecelebrating our 20th anniversary
on June 4th.
(10:57):
He, I've had a huge surprise,50th birthday party planned for
him.
June 7th.
Then of course Father's Day, andthen his 20 year sobriety date,
and then his actual 50thbirthday.
And we had plans.
It was.
A crazy busy month.
So I had told him our bigcelebration for our 20th
anniversary is in September.
We're going to Hawaii.
(11:17):
Neither of us have ever been, sowe're super excited.
But I said, Hey, let's go toMount Shasta.
Just, the weekend prior to ouranniversary, I think it would be
great to just have a little minigetaway, like we deserve it and
like we'll do some hiking andit'll be really fun.
Let me say, I'm not like a hugehiker.
By hiking, like light trails.
Like we're not like doinganything crazy.
(11:38):
So we got there and did some funlittle trails and hikes and
waterfalls.
And then the next day, samething we were coming back from
Burning Falls and headed toanother fall area and we saw
there's the bridge from themovie Stand by Me.
That is right there in thatarea.
And we're like, oh yeah, let'sgo stop and look at it.
And so we're looking and, hewent, my, my husband decided to
(12:02):
walk down the hill, to gounderneath the bridge and just
explore down there.
I'm not much of an explorer.
I'm just kinda okay, like I'mgonna stand up here and just
take pictures and breathe it inbecause I'm in Mount Shasta, the
root chakra of the world, right?
And I was like, yeah, give it tome Pachamama.
Like I want, give it, come on.
Like I'm like here to.
What do you have to give me?
I'm like, in my meditative zonetaking it all in.
(12:25):
And I thought, okay, I'm gonnago walk down here to take a look
at him and say see what he'sdoing.
And I'm a very methodical whenit comes to walking downhill or
walking through rocks, I'm like,okay, I'm gonna go this way and
I'm gonna go, okay, let, thatdoesn't feel safe because.
Fear, is huge in my body.
And she's usually no, we ain'tgonna do that.
So I'm like, okay, I'm gonna gothis way, I'm gonna go this way.
(12:45):
And in my mind I was thinkinglike,'cause it seems when I hike
or get really like physicallyexertion, like going on, like
I'm really like working, like mybody wants to talk to me and
tell me all kinds of stuff.
And it had been sharing, justhow.
Some people, don't even, some,there's some people that will
just stand up on the hill andthey won't even come down.
(13:07):
And then there's some peoplethat will, take it nice and easy
or some that will run I wasgiven all these like metaphors
to hiking and walking and trailsand all this kind of stuff, and
I had thought in my mind like,yeah, some people wouldn't even
walk this way.
They'd be scared that they were,they'd be just afraid that they
would break an ankle.
So they don't even try.
And so I'm walking a night.
Start slipping and I'm like, oh,I'm gonna slide.
(13:29):
I'm gonna land on my butt, and Iwas ready for it.
Bracing myself and my left leg,decided maybe to slip a little
faster and my right leg, I don'tknow if it got stuck on
something, it just didn't, Idon't know.
But it just snapped.
The left side of me slipped, theright side of me, held still,
(13:51):
and it just.
I felt it snap and I just wasdown and I was screaming in
agony and pain and my husbandcame running up and was just
like, what, here, let me helpyou stand up.
And it was like, oh no.
I'm not standing up.
This is not happening.
And he's what do you want me todo?
And I was like, you need to gocall 9 1 1.
So ambulance came, got me up offthe hill.
(14:15):
Took the ambulance, like halfwaydown'cause we're, probably a
good over an hour away from thehospital.
Then they ended up having tometa flight me, which I am not
good at flying in general.
And I've swore I would never getinto a helicopter ever.
And so when the ambulance, Iwanna, we pulled over, I'm like,
what are we doing?
She's oh this, the helicopter'sgonna come pick you up.
(14:37):
I said, the fuck it is?
What are you talking about?
And she's just you'll be okay.
And just, yeah, all these allthese interesting things,
happening to me that like mybody's never comfortable with,
but having to go through.
But I do remember sitting onthat hill just like waiting for
the ambulance and remindingmyself to breathe and breathe
(15:02):
into stop holding onto thispain, but to breathe through it
and to breathe.
So that was, had become a bigpart of my healing process, was
just breathing through theemotional trauma, the physical
trauma, and the pain.
(15:23):
And just really letting that gothrough me feeling it instead of
holding.
Yeah it's as if your entire,something cracks, right?
It collapses.
And life doesn't go as planned.
So would you say in thebeginning did this injury feel
like a betrayal or more like asecret interruption?
(15:44):
I felt betrayed.
So the super interesting part isthat as I was sitting on this
slope, this hill just,breathing, crying, feeling all
the feelings, I saw outside ofmyself, I saw, felt, sensed,
imagined this crack in mytimeline.
(16:05):
Like I could just see it thiscrack, and here I was, that fell
underneath, right?
Like I just was sitting thereand then I could see my other
self, the girl that didn't walkdown the hill off.
Laughing, going on with her day,leaving the site, like driving
away, going to all the other,events we had planned that day.
(16:28):
Like just laughing and justenjoying herself.
Not laughing at me, but justjoyful in spirit.
And here I was left to sit inthis crack of a timeline in pain
and crying and miserable.
It was the craziest.
(16:49):
Imagery, the sense, the feeling,like all of it was so
gut-wrenchingly painful, likeemotionally painful.
Like I cried so hard for thatfor weeks and weeks because it
was like I could just, I couldfeel I was so alone.
I was like, no, don't leave me.
(17:11):
Why are you like, it was.
I see.
I cannot explain it well enough.
Just that depth of.
Loneliness.
Yeah.
And lonely and just, andbetrayal.
I can't, like what did I do?
This is not what I asked for.
Like I wanted thisenlightenment.
I'm here to receive what youhave to give me.
(17:34):
And you, but you fucked me over.
Like how did you do that to me?
Like I was doing so good.
I felt like I was on such agreat path.
I had this momentum and youdropped me.
And then this other, what partof you feels like it was being
peeled away at that moment?
(17:56):
I know you described like theother version of you, but in
this process, what part of youfelt like was being peeled away?
I don't know if I felt likeanything was being peeled away.
And maybe I just, I will need toprocess it some more and think
about it, but like I just.
I just felt like I had donesome, like it was a punishment.
(18:19):
Like I had done something wrong.
Like it was like, or I was beingstopped no, like you're, you
stay here.
Yeah, I'm not.
No worries.
Yeah.
I was gonna say, I something Ilearned recently that just
really allowed me to click fromever feeling like I did
something wrong or punished bythe universe, was that the
(18:39):
universe is unconditionally,it's a provider, so it provides
you, and it listens to youunconditionally.
So I find it ironic just as theoutsider listening to your
story, how you, that story isreally.
Profound with what you shared,with how you were like, I'm open
to receive the healing.
I'm open to receive the codes,the enlightenment, the, all
(19:03):
these things.
And I just find that littlethread there.
Where in this moment as wecontinue going on this
conversation, all of the thingsthat you've let go of and
learned of and the things thatit's brought up inside of you,
how enlightening it's, thiswhole process to which you would
never really be able to receivethat.
If life was going good, right?
If life was always just happy golucky and everything was
(19:25):
perfect.
But knowing that the universe isunconditionally like a provider
and it listens to usunconditionally, and it gives us
what it want, it's not that wedid anything wrong, it's just
oh, okay.
Here's the perfect solution forthat.
Here it is.
And it gives you exactly what isneeded in that moment.
It's just in that moment, itfeels like fucking bullshit and
it's fucking brings up the angerand it brings up the rage and it
(19:47):
brings up all the fucking thingsthat you absolutely don't wanna
feel in that moment, but.
The whole point of the soul,right?
Yeah.
To feel it be in it to all thosethings.
Yeah.
And it wasn't until probably,quite a few weeks later when I
was in my AK records and they solovingly and also laugh, they
(20:09):
like to laugh and giggle with mea lot and it was.
You asked for a spiritualexperience and you got one.
Yeah.
And I just had to laugh too, andI was like, oh yeah, you're
right.
You're right.
Yeah.
It brings you back into thebody.
It's like a descent, like intothe body, into the paw, into
that messy middle.
And I can only imagine, we'vealready spoken about this a
(20:31):
little bit, but I can onlyimagine.
It's the direct opposite of howyou were living before and your,
the way you valued going andproducing and providing, and all
of those things.
So when your nervous systemslows like that, the grief is
gonna surface.
And it's not just the grief ofthe incident.
We may feel like it is, and wemay put it all on that, but I
(20:52):
can only imagine the survivalpatterns that are lifted up and
the grief that was lifted up.
What emotion, I know you'veexpressed this pretty well, but
what emotion showed up when youcouldn't outrun yourself
anymore?
What were you finding you wereafraid of in that stillness?
Because you were literallyforced to just sit, you couldn't
provide, you had to receive, youhad to do all the things that
probably give you the eeb gvs,tell me a little bit about that.
(21:14):
What did you find?
I found actually like how.
I'm truly blessed that I am.
And somebody else had mentionedthis and I hadn't thought about
it before, but she was just Ireally think that it's
interesting that this came atyour anniversary, like a 20 year
anniversary, a huge part ofyour, an of your marriage.
(21:36):
And I was like, oh, I didn'teven really think about that.
And just discovering, the truelove that my husband does have
for me.
Whereas I always have had aguard up, right?
Because.
I think there was always a partof me that was just eh, does he
(21:57):
really love me?
I'm not the prettiest or the,definitely like body issues, not
the thinnest.
And he, my husband's a lotsmaller than me.
Physique wise, I'm a biggergirl.
He's, a very skinny man.
So that was always such an issuewith me.
But just that, fuck, this pianoreally loves me a lot.
(22:18):
Like he is really taking care ofme, like dropping everything and
nothing was, I was never aburden.
I was never he never acted,exasperated to okay what do you
need?
What can I do?
I'm here.
Just the support was amazing.
And of course, just feeling sookay I'm sorry, I can't help.
Okay.
It's okay.
It's okay.
Don't worry about it.
(22:38):
You just, you obviously youcan't move.
It's all right.
But yeah, having to cancelclasses, having to, not sure
what's gonna happen with myretreat.
There was a lot of that worry ofwhat am I gonna do now?
Like for a job wise, I'mentrepreneur, so I, I don't have
the traditional oh, I get myselfon disability.
It was just like, oh my gosh,financially too.
(22:59):
Like, how's that gonna work?
What am I gonna do?
How can I am, what am I puttingon the table for?
My family.
My family, or for my friends,and I didn't have to put
anything because they were allhere for me.
You get to just be, it's likethe gift that we always wanted,
but when we finally get it,we're like, this is so
uncomfortable.
I always say the fear isn'tactually of being left or
(23:21):
abandoned.
It's actually to experienceunconditional love because that
shit is frightening when youhaven't experienced it.
It is so frightening to reallyfeel that unconditional love,
and then once you finally let itin, you're like, oh.
This is what they mean.
Yeah.
You just be, you can justreceive and allow and there was
(23:43):
no need to do.
There's no give or take and allof those things and that's so
beautiful.
I can hear it in your voice andjust see it like what a big
realization, Stacy.
Yeah.
And it's not, maybe even not somuch oh, I can't, I'm sorry, I
can't give back to you, or Ican't do, but that of allowing
it and letting it come in andwhat does that oh yeah, that
(24:05):
does feel weird.
And it's not, it wasn't, andmaybe this is just coming to me
as we're talking whew.
That was okay.
Sorry.
That was just like the epiphany,right?
When something dawns on you, andmaybe that's why I've always
been such a give give.
Because to take it in withoutbeing allowed to give back,
you're forced to feel.
(24:27):
What that feels like.
Oh, okay.
Thank you for giving this to me.
What can I give you next to me?
Okay, what I have, on the sideof my bed I have nothing to give
back to you, so I just am forcedto feel your love and your you
think you just said that, right?
You're just forced to feel thislove and generosity and Yeah.
What does that feel like?
It's oh, am I worthy of that?
(24:48):
Oh God, don't you know?
Oh, I don't know how that feelsin my body.
It's like the most blissfulfeeling ever.
But it's, it brings up all thoseall the things that we haven't
dealt with, right?
And we all have it.
We all have those moments in ourlife multiple moments in our
life that compound, that lead tothat.
And they always say like, whenyou.
(25:09):
Something that I'm workingthrough, I'll be vulnerable
here.
So just to match with you,something that I'm working
through right now is like withinmy business, realizing my need
to do and to create a business.
Like I'm realizing, I'm like,where is this coming from?
Where is this massive need forthis big business coming from?
Because I, obviously, I'mputting in the effort, but it's
not actually happening.
(25:29):
So there's an incongruentenergetics there, right?
Obviously there's somethingincongruent.
And what I realized was the needto help and the need to provide
and to create was actually atrauma response to feeling
needed to not actually receivethe love and the uncondition of
(25:52):
just being like, who am Iwithout that?
Who am I without that?
And it was very confronting tojust say, I'm gonna put it to
the side right now.
It's a simple word, like I justsaid that, and it probably
doesn't sound that profound, butthat night when I did make that
decision to put my business tothe side for a moment and just
be, I was in my bed on Cha GBTam I, what does this mean?
(26:16):
And I just was like, wow.
Like I had so much of myidentity wrapped in needing to
create and need improve and allthese things, but it was really
came down to me not realizingthat.
Just us as human beings as weare is enough.
Yeah.
And we can hear it over and overand over and over again, but it
does not get through until it'sembodied, until you allow
(26:37):
yourself to feel whatever you'reafraid of.
Like I was afraid of just beinga waitress.
I was afraid of just being.
Who I am right now, even thoughI've done so many things and so
have you.
It comes with the territory, Ifeel of getting sober too.
The want to provide and do andcreate and catch up on time lost
and all those things.
(26:57):
So I think that's such abeautiful realization that you
just had.
Yeah.
What would you say, as thisjourney went on,'cause I've been
watching you, I've seen youdoing the breathing and moving
through the pain.
What other emotions reallyshowed up for you when you
couldn't really outrun them?
Where did it, where did theresistance to the descent,
right?
So going back into the body ofbeing stuck in the slow motion,
(27:20):
where did it break you open?
Obviously one we just sharedabout was huge, but what other
lessons and moments have youfound yourself metabolizing over
this time?
Definitely learning to be still.
That was another thing that Ireceived from the Aktion records
stillness and presence, becauseI was gung-ho, right?
I'm like, okay, this happenedfor a reason.
(27:41):
I'm ready to learn.
Tell me what it is.
What's my lesson?
What were what is it?
And so I just wanted to receiveit.
I'm like, I got nothing to do.
I have nothing but time like Iam your, student teach.
And then it was just likecrickets, and so it was very
frustrating to not be receiving.
It's you made this happen.
Now gimme the answers.
(28:02):
What is it that I have to workthrough?
But, slow and steady has been.
The theme for a lot of this tooslow and steady in the healing.
Slow and steady.
When you get to the next phase,like I was telling you before
now I'm learning to work thisknee scooter, so I am able to be
a little bit more independent.
But even with that, it has to bevery slow and steady.
(28:22):
I have to take my time.
Working with plant medicine,it's going very slow and steady.
Just, receiving the answers,receiving all the, I've been
sitting here for a month and ahalf and just now this one
little, like the little nuggets,they're just, very slow and very
steady.
So that was something that inthe Akash was told to me is just
stillness and presence.
That's all I needed to work on.
(28:43):
And so a part of me was likestillness and presence okay.
I know what they mean, but whatdoes stillness and presence mean
to me?
Show me what that means to me.
So stillness, of course, isgetting out of my head and into
my heart space.
And then just being present formy body.
Like they showed me they showedme like a kid getting an award
(29:04):
at a school and like a, likesomeone being there to just
being there for them.
And it wasn't like a parent, itwas more like a mentor.
So I just was like, okay, so I'mbeing there present for my body.
I need to be present for mybody.
I need to be like a mentor formy body and just being there for
it.
And of course, still I'm justlike I don't really know what
that means, but, so just being.
(29:25):
Patient and allowing thesethings to just come to me in
their own time.
The stillness definitely like myworking with, I'm working with
Iboga right now.
Plant medicine and just verysmall little micro mini, mini
doses, slow and steady.
And it is just interesting too.
Sit back and listen to my mind.
(29:46):
There, I know that there's afear.
Part of me, and I know she runsa lot of the show, and then, but
there's also this busy miss busybody is just and then we gotta
do this, and then we gotta dothis.
And like her mind is just, orher essence of who, whatever it
is just constantly, what's ournext step?
She's always.
Okay.
And then that, and then you, oh,you gotta do that.
(30:07):
And let's, that's beenabsolutely driving me bonkers.
But, so getting into thestillness of just even being
aware, like watching, listeningto all of that, but being
outside of it and just okay.
I see you.
I hear you.
I feel you.
I know what you're doing.
And just being conscious of allof that, not really quite sure
(30:27):
what all these next steps are,but just setting myself into
that awareness of what's goingon in the stillness.
A hundred percent.
And that's one of the first, andfoundations of any type of
healing is becoming aware.
And especially if you do likeIFS, which sounds like you're
doing parts work where you'rejust becoming aware and actively
like non-judgmentally observingthese parts of you that are
(30:49):
running the show a lot of timesand they get triggered in
different situations.
So it would be a cool processfor you to do is to really look
back on.
So when we have any type ofinjury like this, or disease or
symptom, it's a combination ofour core wound, right?
So our childhood trauma, thecore wounds.
It could be from not receivingsomething to an actual big T,
small T, whatever it is, right?
(31:10):
You understand that conceptwhere it's not necessarily what
happened, it's how it processedwithin our body, plus our
current life stressors of wherewe are.
And then that equals yourcurrent state of health or of
disease, right?
What you can do is you can lookback on with those parts and
see, okay, when did this part ofme come online?
What is she protecting me from?
(31:32):
What is she?
How is she my protector?
And allowing yourself to go backinto that energetics of that
body or even just have aconversation with her since you
do a lot of visualization andyou can sit and be present and
allow your soul to speak toreally just see what is it that
she's protecting you from andhow can you provide that
unconditional love to whatyou've learned through this
(31:52):
process now that you know whatthat felt sense is and provide
that for her.
Because in, in the end, likethat's really all we truly want
is that unconditional love andacceptance and the ability to
unravel in front of the personthat we love and the person that
we're receiving that from to beheard, to be seen to be
witnessed and all those things.
Yeah.
(32:12):
So just as a little like sidepiece for you to do that, I
think that you probably find alot of wisdom in that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
'cause she definitely always hassomething going on.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Mine's like my angry inner teen,right?
She's like the, she's the onewho decided at that age as a
teenager to just take control.
(32:34):
Take control of everything, getshit done.
She can't depend on themasculine nor the feminine.
It was like right around thetime that my mom died.
And like it wasn't like an innerchild healing where she's little
and she's playing.
It was more like.
What's up bitch?
What's up?
Like why are you coming to menow?
Okay.
You know what I mean?
It was a lot of sass, right?
It was a lot of talking back.
It was a lot of just, I had tojust stay there and be like, I'm
(32:57):
not leaving.
I know you hate me, but I'm notleaving and I love you and I'm
sorry, and I'm here now and justgive it to me.
What's up?
How do you need me right now?
And it was just profound, doingthat type of work, having the
place and space to do it.
Yeah.
And quietness.
I feel like when we have to sitstill, our soul becomes louder.
When our body becomes quieter,our soul becomes louder.
(33:18):
And like you said, you can hear,you hear more messages.
You're able to receive from thefield when you're in that
parasympathetic state when we'renot moving and grooving.
But also at the same time, a lotof times.
It's when we're not in the mind.
So like you said, when you werewalking and hiking and doing all
those things, or like whenyou're in the shower, when
you're gardening, when you'relike actively doing something
(33:41):
with your hands, that's, thoseare the moments that I usually
receive the most information.
So yeah, driving when I'mdriving, go for a drive.
So with that being said, whatwould you say as you are
returning back again, you'regetting closer to walking again,
(34:01):
who do you feel the personyou're becoming now in this
season compared to who you were?
Where do you feel things aregonna be changing and shifting?
I think, my hope and my plan isto, again, just really taking
things slow.
(34:22):
Not feeling that everything hasto be this rush to get done,
because if I do a million thingsin a 24 hour span, then that day
wasn't a waste of a day.
Or that I wasn't a waste of, amom or a wife or, a facilitator
or, a chef, whatever it is thatI'm doing.
But that just, that there's alot of healing still, like.
(34:45):
Inside of me that needs to bedone, not just in the physical
part, but there's been thisprocess of emotional healing
that has started.
And like I know that has justonly begun.
And somebody ha my neighbor hadmentioned to me too, that in.
They call it like in the fouryear of a spiritual awakening,
(35:07):
like when something, lots ofpeople will have a traumatic
experience usually a physicalexperience and it's like just
something to knock you down andget you where you need to be.
Like.
So I've been on this spiritualawakening journey for about four
years.
And it's going along, but maybenot fully surrendered.
(35:28):
So it's okay.
Boom, there's your crack.
You're sitting down here likeit's time to, to fully
surrender.
Like you get it but you don'tquite get it a thing.
Yeah.
We usually build on top of likewhen we first get into the work,
we build on top of the survivalbody, right?
'cause like we've been insurvival, we're on autopilot in
the beginning, and then webecome very aware and we start
(35:48):
to build on top of that.
And then it's.
There's this initiation thathappens where there's parts of
us that can't come with usanymore, and a lot of times,
like we, we're unaware of it.
It's really it's not likeanything that we can really do
more of.
It's just allowing life toactivate us and allow those
parts to come through anddifferent circumstances and
people will activate thosemoments.
(36:08):
Yeah, it's honestly an honor ofwhat you're going through.
It's just a, it's a sacrificeand it's painful and it's.
The human fucking experience onsteroids.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm, I'm grateful for it forsure.
I still know that there's a lotto learn from what happened, and
I may not get the full,unfolding of it all and this is
(36:30):
why, and I'll have it all laidout.
But like the, the nuggets arecoming.
And I think a lot of it too isjust that fear of being labeled
as lazy.
I was told a lot as a child thatI was lazy, and that's why I
was, fat.
I was a fat, lazy kid.
So just always keeping myself asbusy as possible, so no one.
(36:50):
Looks at me and thinks of me as,being lazy or that I don't think
of myself as being lazy.
Like I just have to keep busy.
But I just, and a lot of, in myaffirmations and things that I'm
working with in this plantmedicine is that, I am worthy
just how I am like that I don'thave to do or move or be, or,
provide or do all these thingsto be a worthy soul like I am
(37:15):
just.
More they just by being here.
Absolutely.
And you are, you a hundredpercent are with the, like the
psychosomatic connection betweenlike with your ankle, you said
it was on your right side.
Yeah.
Legs are usually a it's thetrust in foundation.
So it's a pillar of trust.
(37:35):
So legs represent foundationaltrust in life and movement in
your direction.
So when this area breaks down,it points to a break down in
trust in your path or force topause from moving forward.
And then with your feet that'slike landing in reality.
So they're connected togrounding, stability, direction,
and support from life itself.
So pain or injury usuallyreflects feeling unstable in
(37:58):
life's foundation, career,relationships, identity.
And I feel like all of this,like initiation has touched on
all those things.
Like we've touched on all thoseconver like in this
conversation.
Challenges with moving forwardand crisis of anchoring.
So where am I going?
Is it safe to get there?
So this will bring up your corewounds, right?
You had said something to melike, what's lighting me up
(38:20):
right now is the idea ofwalking.
Again, not just physically, butmetaphorically.
I want to grow from it.
I want to ring every ounce ofwisdom for this, so obviously
that's like textbooks,psychospiritual, recalibration.
So it's gonna touch on your rootwound, which is a, sounds like a
lot from our conversation, likean identity wound, right?
(38:41):
So fears of, I'm not safe, Ican't move forward until I'm
more in control.
It touches on shame.
I should be able to handle this.
I'm not who I thought I waswithout momentum.
It's gonna touch on grief.
So like letting go of what wassupposed to happen.
Morning plans, morningtimelines, mobility,
productivity, and it's gonnatouch on powerlessness.
(39:02):
So I didn't choose this right.
And then allowing you to reallystep into your body agency to
allow yourself to metabolizethose emotions, feel them, allow
them to be there.
And have more agency in thepause.
But in the moment it's gonnafeel like it threatens that
identity of what you've been,living through.
So I find it super fascinating'cause it's always like the
(39:25):
correlations usually are pretty,pretty direct.
And then I think the right isthe masculine side.
So healing the woundedmasculine, which usually is,
because I know I had to healthat a lot.
When I went from my addiction.
I was in the wounded feminine,and then when I got sober, I
moved directly, like I shut downany part of my feminine side and
(39:45):
I moved directly into my woundedmasculine, which was doing
proving, constantly achieving,gotta get more certifications,
gotta do this, gotta do that.
Like heavy lifting, all thosethings.
Yeah.
So it's that initiation intohealing those parts of you.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What you were saying, all ofthat like rings so true, like
the right side and then theankle and the foot and the lay,
(40:06):
like all of that.
And I think that it's so fuckinginteresting too that I was in
Mount Shasta, which is the rootchakra of the world.
Like it has the energy of theroot chakra.
So I just, all of that it'sjust, it's it tracks.
It all tracks.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
(40:26):
What support or wisdom do youhave for anybody who's
experiencing something similarin their life right now?
What, what feels called to movethrough you right now to, to
anybody listening?
I.
Just, I feel like definitelybreathing, like just connecting
(40:48):
to your breath in all aspects ofyour healing journey.
When the physical pain becomestoo much, when the emotional
pain comes too much, to juststop and recognize that you're
holding, that you're, we holdit.
We have to hold it in andholding it in.
It is just, for me, it was likethis is only going to prolong
(41:11):
the healing.
This is only going to stay stuckinside and create issues later.
And so as much as it hurts, Ijust breathe.
Take that breath in and breathethrough and feel it.
Feel the uncomfortable feelingsof what you're going through
(41:33):
emotionally.
Feel the excruciating pain ofthe things that are happening to
your body that like reallyfucking hurt, like just.
Because it, and it makes it gofaster than when you're holding
onto it.
When you're holding on andwanting to have control of it.
Oh, like I'm not, I don't wanna,I don't wanna it lasts longer
(41:55):
than if you surrender and just,and just really feel it.
Yeah, it hurts, but it's notgonna last as long as if you
just let it go through you.
I feel like that is my biggesttakeaway from all of that.
My strongest if I could telleverybody just to just remember
(42:19):
to breathe and take thosebreaths through that journey
that you are feeling.
It's just, it's been everythingfor me.
That's beautiful because itdoesn't just apply to pain or an
injury.
It applies to everything.
Everything.
Discomfort of emotion.
Yeah.
Just breathing through it,allowing yourself to go into
(42:41):
like root, deeper into theemotion.
Allow that to flow through yourather than to, I think the
saying is like, the minute thatyou try to heal to get
something, it stops becomehealing.
So it's just allowing, allowingit to move through.
That's beautiful.
I have some yeah, I have aprompt that I'm gonna ask you
and just complete the sentenceto just close out this ritual of
(43:05):
this conversation with us.
And then, we'll move forwardfrom that.
But it's the somatic truth.
So I'll ask you the question.
I'll just stop and then you canfinish it for me.
So it starts with my body taughtme that I am.
Powerful.
Beautiful.
(43:26):
I used to think healing meant.
Now I know it means, I used tothink that healing meant being
weak, and now I know that itmeans being strong.
(43:47):
Beautiful.
Let this be a reminder toeverybody that healing doesn't
always look like movement.
Sometimes the most sacredforward motion is staying
exactly where you are and justlistening.
So listening and allowing, andlike Stacy said, breathing into
it.
We touched on so much talkingabout receiving an unconditional
(44:08):
love, allowing surrendering,allowing the anger to come
through too.
Like you, I think that youreally have portrayed that
beautifully, how it's okay tofeel like it sucks because it
does, but it's also okay tobalance that out with also
knowing that it sucks.
I'm a human.
This is painful.
And then also.
I know that there's wisdom inthis and just really anchoring
(44:30):
in and allowing and surrenderingover and over again.
I don't know.
I just think that's gonna be sobeautiful for people.
So seriously.
Thank you Stacy.
How can people get in touch withyou?
You are welcome.
Thank you.
I am on Facebook.
I have the Embodied Collectivepage.
And then on Instagram, I'm juststill SML Bennett.
(44:53):
I also have a website that is inthe process of being
constructed, so hopefullythat'll be done soon.
But that's also, that'll be theembodied collective.com.
Perfect.
Amazing.
To anybody that feels called toreach out to Stacy, please do.
You have.
So much wisdom and you're suchan amazing soul.
Like I said being able to bondwith you at the retreat that we
(45:15):
were at a couple months ago justmeant the world to me.
And being able to hold space foryou in this moment and hear
everything that you've learnedand just to see how much you've
changed from this really I wannawitness you right now the
strength that it's taken andalso the strength to allow
yourself to unravel and just.
Allow it to move through you isbeautiful and I just can't wait
(45:36):
to see what comes from this, toreally see that.
Sending you so much love andgiving you a big virtual hug
right now.
But thank you so much for comingonto the episode.
Thank you so much.
I'm so grateful that you evenhad me.
I've told you a million times.
Just you're the smartest, mostbrilliant and eloquently spoken,
(45:59):
poetic, beautiful soul that I'veever met in my entire life, and
I could just sit and listen toyou speak for hours and hours.
I receive that.
I receive that.
I take that in.
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
We're gonna check outta here andhopefully you got something
outta this today, and
you'll find all the links in theshow notes below, and if this
(46:20):
episode cracks something open inyou, share it, text it to a
friend, post it to your stories,or write a review on Apple or
Spotify.
It means the world and it helpsthis medicine reach more women
who need it.
Until next time, stay embodied,stay curious, and remember,
healing isn't about fixingyourself.
It's about finally coming home.
(46:42):
I love you mean it, and I'll seeyou next week
The body is not less than the soul,
and the further up is in higher.
It's actually deeper in.
I heard those words recently,and something in me cracked wide
open because for far too longwe've been fed the myth that
healing and spirituality liveabove us somewhere outside the
mess.
We've been taught to chase thelight, to bypass the pain, to
(00:23):
transcend the body, and thencall it ascension.
But what I know in my bones isthat the soul doesn't wanna
float above life or the body.
It wants to feel it.
It wants to root in to livethrough the body, not in spite
of it.
And that's exactly where we'regoing in today's conversation.
(00:43):
This episode is an invitation tostop seeing physical symptoms as
setbacks and start honoring themas sacred stops to stop trying
to get over it and instead ask.
What is this moment trying toroot me into?
My guest today is Stacy Bennett.
She's the founder of theEmbodied Collective, a
breathwork facilitator, a soundhealer, a reiki master, and a
(01:06):
sacred rebel who has walked thepath of recovery, emotional
reclamation, and spiritualgrounding.
And right now she's deep in it,healing from a broken ankle, not
just physically, but spirituallyand psychosomatically.
Welcome to Embody this, the NOBS Healing podcast for women who
are done playing small.
(01:27):
I'm Lauren Michelle Jewel, asingle sober business owning
badass who has been humbled ashell by healing.
But I'm not just someone who'slived it.
I've studied it, coached it, andhelped women walk through it for
over seven years in mind, bodyhealth, gut brain science, and
nervous system healing.
I've worked with women who havetried everything, therapy,
(01:49):
diets, supplements, self-helpwork, but still feel
disconnected from their bodies,their health, and their truth.
Because here's the thing,healing isn't a trend.
It's not aesthetic.
It's not an identity.
Healing is embodied, and let mebe real with you, it's hard as
fuck and it's also rewarding asfuck.
(02:11):
I know because I've lived it.
And along the way I realizedsomething.
Modern healing methods arefailing us.
Everything is compartmentalized.
Go to therapy.
They say, take the supplements,do the inner work, but no one
teaches you how to actuallyintegrate it.
All this show is for you ifyou're ready to rethink healing.
(02:34):
It's not about being perfect,being a wellness influencer or
having a PhD in biohacking.
It's about undoing, unlearning,and finally coming home to
yourself.
Quick disclaimer, this podcastis for educational purposes
only.
It's here to expand your mind,challenge old narratives, and
empower you with knowledge.
(02:55):
It's not a replacement formedical advice.
Always consult a professionalwhen making health decisions.
If this episode hits home,follow the share, rate it,
review it, share it with someonewho needs to hear it, because
you never know whose life youmight change.
Now let's fucking go.
Audio Only - All Participa (03:14):
This is not a story about injury.
It's a story about what happenswhen life forces you to pause
when your forward motion stops,and the only direction left is
to go inward.
We'll be talking about what itmeans to surrender when your
nervous system is wired to dofix and achieve the grief of
unmet timelines and identities.
We've outgrown the body's way ofspeaking truth when the mind
(03:37):
tries to outrun it.
How pain breakdown and stillnessare often the exact portals to
embodiment.
So if you've ever felt betrayedby your body, if you've ever
judged your symptoms instead oflistening to them, and if you've
ever felt like healing washappening to you instead of
through you, then this one's foryou because healing isn't about
(03:57):
getting back to who you were.
It's about descending into whoyou're here to become.
So let's get into it.
Welcome, Stacy.
I'm so fucking excited to diveinto this conversation with you.
How you doing?
Ooh.
Oh my gosh.
That that took me back, like tothe beginning of this journey,
and I have tears already.
Just I thinking of those veryfirst days and all of that, all
(04:22):
of the, everything that you justsaid, it was good.
We're done.
The show's over to hear.
That was perfect.
There we go.
I know.
It's my favorite thing to do isto write these intros to honor
the guests and then also toreally.
Speak to the, the energetics ofhow this call is gonna go.
And you are such a magical humanbeing who I've just met honestly
(04:46):
a couple months ago, but itfeels like we've known each
other actually a couple year agoor so.
But it feels like we've knowneach other forever.
And when we met, we both werelike, we met for a reason.
Yeah, we don't know why yet, buthere we are, so I know I wanted
to get you onto this podcastprior to the injury, but.
(05:06):
The moment that I saw thathappening, and like I told you
before this call and the momentthat it came through me, I think
I was driving where I was like,this is a perfect conversation
to have for not only you, butfor others to be like, listen,
these moments in our life wherethey really feel like they're.
Stopping everything in yourtracks and causing you to be
(05:29):
confronted by everything thatwas no longer serving you.
This is a perfect conversationto have.
So seriously.
Welcome in.
I'll let you get your bearings,you know your bearings here, but
why don't you tell us a littlebit about yourself first before
we get into the story of thiswhole conversation and kind of
tell us a little bit about whoStacy is.
(05:52):
Whew.
That's the hardest question.
Oh my gosh, I, you didn't warnme about this question.
I am, I'm a woman who islearning to slow the fuck down.
I know that for sure right now.
I'm a personal chef.
I'm a, like you named off Reikisound breath.
Getting into all of it, I'm amom of three boys, a wife of 20
(06:15):
years.
And just this soul that is, likeyou said, just learning to feel
into her body.
Someone who ran from her bodyher whole entire life.
You really got me with that inthe beginning.
Like I just, I have to say thatI just felt that like the soul
doesn't wanna live outside.
It wants to be in and feel andgo through all of that.
(06:36):
And that really, I felt thatlike really emotionally, really
strong.
Not even from the accident butthat definitely, that hit a lot.
But just to now think who I amand somebody that has really
done her best to avoid the bodythat she's given.
And one of the many things,learning from this, having to
(06:58):
feel into the pain, breathe intothe pain instead of trying to
avoid the pain that was onsetfrom falling but just even just
learning to live and love andfeel into this body that.
I wanted, right?
Like we wanted to come to thistime and this space, like our
(07:20):
soul, all our soul ever wantedwas a body.
And I got one and all I've donemy whole life is just abuse and
neglect and unlove and mistreat.
I'm definitely learning.
That's not the way, especiallyto enlightenment or to enjoy
this time on earth.
Like I, this is what I wantedand this is what I got.
(07:42):
And just to be grateful andappreciative and feel all the
blessings of being who I am inthis body that I've been given
in this.
That's so beautiful.
What a beautiful realization.
'cause I think I said somethingyesterday.
It was like the soul came hereto be in the body because
without the body, the soul can'tfeel.
(08:04):
And that's like the whole point.
It's to feel all of it.
And we're learning that, right?
We've all been taught not tofeel certain emotions.
We've been taught to really likediscipline the body, to look a
certain way, to shame the body,to quiet the body.
But the whole point is feelingto live in, to experience
consciousness within the biologyof this body and.
(08:27):
That realization in itself isjust super profound.
I had it, I've known it, but it.
To hear it.
I was listening to somethingyesterday.
It's where that kind of gotinspired from that intro where I
was like, this is it.
This is the, it's not the hero'sjourney, but this is the
heroine's journey, it's the theopposite of the hero's journey
where it's about conquering andproving and ascending.
(08:49):
And the heroine's journey ismore about remembering,
releasing, reclaiming, androoting back in and really
allowing ourselves to just.
Transcend what has been densewithin our body to learn from
the lessons, to experienceeverything that we've gone
through, and seeing it as a giftrather than, a punishment.
(09:10):
Yeah.
Tell me a little bit aboutright, like in the har Heroin's
journey, there's always like theseparation from the old self,
the fall, the break.
So within my work with thepsychosomatic work, a lot of
times what I'll do withsymptoms, injury, muscular
disease.
We always ask what was going onbefore the injury.
(09:32):
So where were you at before thisinjury?
And if you can think back of notonly physically, but like
emotionally and mentally, wherewere you at?
I was doing really well,actually.
Which it was a big thing that Idwelled on like I was doing.
Really good.
I had been, I had just gotten agmap test done for my stomach
(09:56):
and so I, my vitamins were onpoint of everything that I
needed to take to clear, likeleaky gut things and what is it
called?
The estrogen recycling, likejust things that were going on
in detoxification.
Yes, I was doing all of that andjust eating a very, clean diet.
But I was, still thinking likelearning to.
(10:16):
Appreciate food and, not deprivemyself, but I was eating to
nourish my body as the goddessthat I am.
Let's really feed you for loveand purpose and not deprive you
like a diet.
I've been on a diet since I wasin the third grade, so it was
like, I didn't wanna do thatanymore.
My practice is going good.
I'm, hosting classes.
(10:37):
I have a retreat next month inAugust that I had, have
scheduled and, just differentclasses that I've been doing.
I was on, I had a lot ofmomentum and things that were
doing good.
I'm like, okay, like I'm on thistrack and everything's going
really well.
June was a huge month.
My husband and I werecelebrating our 20th anniversary
on June 4th.
(10:57):
He, I've had a huge surprise,50th birthday party planned for
him.
June 7th.
Then of course Father's Day, andthen his 20 year sobriety date,
and then his actual 50thbirthday.
And we had plans.
It was.
A crazy busy month.
So I had told him our bigcelebration for our 20th
anniversary is in September.
We're going to Hawaii.
(11:17):
Neither of us have ever been, sowe're super excited.
But I said, Hey, let's go toMount Shasta.
Just, the weekend prior to ouranniversary, I think it would be
great to just have a little minigetaway, like we deserve it and
like we'll do some hiking andit'll be really fun.
Let me say, I'm not like a hugehiker.
By hiking, like light trails.
Like we're not like doinganything crazy.
(11:38):
So we got there and did some funlittle trails and hikes and
waterfalls.
And then the next day, samething we were coming back from
Burning Falls and headed toanother fall area and we saw
there's the bridge from themovie Stand by Me.
That is right there in thatarea.
And we're like, oh yeah, let'sgo stop and look at it.
And so we're looking and, hewent, my, my husband decided to
(12:02):
walk down the hill, to gounderneath the bridge and just
explore down there.
I'm not much of an explorer.
I'm just kinda okay, like I'mgonna stand up here and just
take pictures and breathe it inbecause I'm in Mount Shasta, the
root chakra of the world, right?
And I was like, yeah, give it tome Pachamama.
Like I want, give it, come on.
Like I'm like here to.
What do you have to give me?
I'm like, in my meditative zonetaking it all in.
(12:25):
And I thought, okay, I'm gonnago walk down here to take a look
at him and say see what he'sdoing.
And I'm a very methodical whenit comes to walking downhill or
walking through rocks, I'm like,okay, I'm gonna go this way and
I'm gonna go, okay, let, thatdoesn't feel safe because.
Fear, is huge in my body.
And she's usually no, we ain'tgonna do that.
So I'm like, okay, I'm gonna gothis way, I'm gonna go this way.
(12:45):
And in my mind I was thinkinglike,'cause it seems when I hike
or get really like physicallyexertion, like going on, like
I'm really like working, like mybody wants to talk to me and
tell me all kinds of stuff.
And it had been sharing, justhow.
Some people, don't even, some,there's some people that will
just stand up on the hill andthey won't even come down.
(13:07):
And then there's some peoplethat will, take it nice and easy
or some that will run I wasgiven all these like metaphors
to hiking and walking and trailsand all this kind of stuff, and
I had thought in my mind like,yeah, some people wouldn't even
walk this way.
They'd be scared that they were,they'd be just afraid that they
would break an ankle.
So they don't even try.
And so I'm walking a night.
Start slipping and I'm like, oh,I'm gonna slide.
(13:29):
I'm gonna land on my butt, and Iwas ready for it.
Bracing myself and my left leg,decided maybe to slip a little
faster and my right leg, I don'tknow if it got stuck on
something, it just didn't, Idon't know.
But it just snapped.
The left side of me slipped, theright side of me, held still,
(13:51):
and it just.
I felt it snap and I just wasdown and I was screaming in
agony and pain and my husbandcame running up and was just
like, what, here, let me helpyou stand up.
And it was like, oh no.
I'm not standing up.
This is not happening.
And he's what do you want me todo?
And I was like, you need to gocall 9 1 1.
So ambulance came, got me up offthe hill.
(14:15):
Took the ambulance, like halfwaydown'cause we're, probably a
good over an hour away from thehospital.
Then they ended up having tometa flight me, which I am not
good at flying in general.
And I've swore I would never getinto a helicopter ever.
And so when the ambulance, Iwanna, we pulled over, I'm like,
what are we doing?
She's oh this, the helicopter'sgonna come pick you up.
(14:37):
I said, the fuck it is?
What are you talking about?
And she's just you'll be okay.
And just, yeah, all these allthese interesting things,
happening to me that like mybody's never comfortable with,
but having to go through.
But I do remember sitting onthat hill just like waiting for
the ambulance and remindingmyself to breathe and breathe
(15:02):
into stop holding onto thispain, but to breathe through it
and to breathe.
So that was, had become a bigpart of my healing process, was
just breathing through theemotional trauma, the physical
trauma, and the pain.
(15:23):
And just really letting that gothrough me feeling it instead of
holding.
Yeah it's as if your entire,something cracks, right?
It collapses.
And life doesn't go as planned.
So would you say in thebeginning did this injury feel
like a betrayal or more like asecret interruption?
(15:44):
I felt betrayed.
So the super interesting part isthat as I was sitting on this
slope, this hill just,breathing, crying, feeling all
the feelings, I saw outside ofmyself, I saw, felt, sensed,
imagined this crack in mytimeline.
(16:05):
Like I could just see it thiscrack, and here I was, that fell
underneath, right?
Like I just was sitting thereand then I could see my other
self, the girl that didn't walkdown the hill off.
Laughing, going on with her day,leaving the site, like driving
away, going to all the other,events we had planned that day.
(16:28):
Like just laughing and justenjoying herself.
Not laughing at me, but justjoyful in spirit.
And here I was left to sit inthis crack of a timeline in pain
and crying and miserable.
It was the craziest.
(16:49):
Imagery, the sense, the feeling,like all of it was so
gut-wrenchingly painful, likeemotionally painful.
Like I cried so hard for thatfor weeks and weeks because it
was like I could just, I couldfeel I was so alone.
I was like, no, don't leave me.
(17:11):
Why are you like, it was.
I see.
I cannot explain it well enough.
Just that depth of.
Loneliness.
Yeah.
And lonely and just, andbetrayal.
I can't, like what did I do?
This is not what I asked for.
Like I wanted thisenlightenment.
I'm here to receive what youhave to give me.
(17:34):
And you, but you fucked me over.
Like how did you do that to me?
Like I was doing so good.
I felt like I was on such agreat path.
I had this momentum and youdropped me.
And then this other, what partof you feels like it was being
peeled away at that moment?
(17:56):
I know you described like theother version of you, but in
this process, what part of youfelt like was being peeled away?
I don't know if I felt likeanything was being peeled away.
And maybe I just, I will need toprocess it some more and think
about it, but like I just.
I just felt like I had donesome, like it was a punishment.
(18:19):
Like I had done something wrong.
Like it was like, or I was beingstopped no, like you're, you
stay here.
Yeah, I'm not.
No worries.
Yeah.
I was gonna say, I something Ilearned recently that just
really allowed me to click fromever feeling like I did
something wrong or punished bythe universe, was that the
(18:39):
universe is unconditionally,it's a provider, so it provides
you, and it listens to youunconditionally.
So I find it ironic just as theoutsider listening to your
story, how you, that story isreally.
Profound with what you shared,with how you were like, I'm open
to receive the healing.
I'm open to receive the codes,the enlightenment, the, all
(19:03):
these things.
And I just find that littlethread there.
Where in this moment as wecontinue going on this
conversation, all of the thingsthat you've let go of and
learned of and the things thatit's brought up inside of you,
how enlightening it's, thiswhole process to which you would
never really be able to receivethat.
If life was going good, right?
If life was always just happy golucky and everything was
(19:25):
perfect.
But knowing that the universe isunconditionally like a provider
and it listens to usunconditionally, and it gives us
what it want, it's not that wedid anything wrong, it's just
oh, okay.
Here's the perfect solution forthat.
Here it is.
And it gives you exactly what isneeded in that moment.
It's just in that moment, itfeels like fucking bullshit and
it's fucking brings up the angerand it brings up the rage and it
(19:47):
brings up all the fucking thingsthat you absolutely don't wanna
feel in that moment, but.
The whole point of the soul,right?
Yeah.
To feel it be in it to all thosethings.
Yeah.
And it wasn't until probably,quite a few weeks later when I
was in my AK records and they solovingly and also laugh, they
(20:09):
like to laugh and giggle with mea lot and it was.
You asked for a spiritualexperience and you got one.
Yeah.
And I just had to laugh too, andI was like, oh yeah, you're
right.
You're right.
Yeah.
It brings you back into thebody.
It's like a descent, like intothe body, into the paw, into
that messy middle.
And I can only imagine, we'vealready spoken about this a
(20:31):
little bit, but I can onlyimagine.
It's the direct opposite of howyou were living before and your,
the way you valued going andproducing and providing, and all
of those things.
So when your nervous systemslows like that, the grief is
gonna surface.
And it's not just the grief ofthe incident.
We may feel like it is, and wemay put it all on that, but I
(20:52):
can only imagine the survivalpatterns that are lifted up and
the grief that was lifted up.
What emotion, I know you'veexpressed this pretty well, but
what emotion showed up when youcouldn't outrun yourself
anymore?
What were you finding you wereafraid of in that stillness?
Because you were literallyforced to just sit, you couldn't
provide, you had to receive, youhad to do all the things that
probably give you the eeb gvs,tell me a little bit about that.
(21:14):
What did you find?
I found actually like how.
I'm truly blessed that I am.
And somebody else had mentionedthis and I hadn't thought about
it before, but she was just Ireally think that it's
interesting that this came atyour anniversary, like a 20 year
anniversary, a huge part ofyour, an of your marriage.
(21:36):
And I was like, oh, I didn'teven really think about that.
And just discovering, the truelove that my husband does have
for me.
Whereas I always have had aguard up, right?
Because.
I think there was always a partof me that was just eh, does he
(21:57):
really love me?
I'm not the prettiest or the,definitely like body issues, not
the thinnest.
And he, my husband's a lotsmaller than me.
Physique wise, I'm a biggergirl.
He's, a very skinny man.
So that was always such an issuewith me.
But just that, fuck, this pianoreally loves me a lot.
(22:18):
Like he is really taking care ofme, like dropping everything and
nothing was, I was never aburden.
I was never he never acted,exasperated to okay what do you
need?
What can I do?
I'm here.
Just the support was amazing.
And of course, just feeling sookay I'm sorry, I can't help.
Okay.
It's okay.
It's okay.
Don't worry about it.
(22:38):
You just, you obviously youcan't move.
It's all right.
But yeah, having to cancelclasses, having to, not sure
what's gonna happen with myretreat.
There was a lot of that worry ofwhat am I gonna do now?
Like for a job wise, I'mentrepreneur, so I, I don't have
the traditional oh, I get myselfon disability.
It was just like, oh my gosh,financially too.
(22:59):
Like, how's that gonna work?
What am I gonna do?
How can I am, what am I puttingon the table for?
My family.
My family, or for my friends,and I didn't have to put
anything because they were allhere for me.
You get to just be, it's likethe gift that we always wanted,
but when we finally get it,we're like, this is so
uncomfortable.
I always say the fear isn'tactually of being left or
(23:21):
abandoned.
It's actually to experienceunconditional love because that
shit is frightening when youhaven't experienced it.
It is so frightening to reallyfeel that unconditional love,
and then once you finally let itin, you're like, oh.
This is what they mean.
Yeah.
You just be, you can justreceive and allow and there was
(23:43):
no need to do.
There's no give or take and allof those things and that's so
beautiful.
I can hear it in your voice andjust see it like what a big
realization, Stacy.
Yeah.
And it's not, maybe even not somuch oh, I can't, I'm sorry, I
can't give back to you, or Ican't do, but that of allowing
it and letting it come in andwhat does that oh yeah, that
(24:05):
does feel weird.
And it's not, it wasn't, andmaybe this is just coming to me
as we're talking whew.
That was okay.
Sorry.
That was just like the epiphany,right?
When something dawns on you, andmaybe that's why I've always
been such a give give.
Because to take it in withoutbeing allowed to give back,
you're forced to feel.
(24:27):
What that feels like.
Oh, okay.
Thank you for giving this to me.
What can I give you next to me?
Okay, what I have, on the sideof my bed I have nothing to give
back to you, so I just am forcedto feel your love and your you
think you just said that, right?
You're just forced to feel thislove and generosity and Yeah.
What does that feel like?
It's oh, am I worthy of that?
(24:48):
Oh God, don't you know?
Oh, I don't know how that feelsin my body.
It's like the most blissfulfeeling ever.
But it's, it brings up all thoseall the things that we haven't
dealt with, right?
And we all have it.
We all have those moments in ourlife multiple moments in our
life that compound, that lead tothat.
And they always say like, whenyou.
(25:09):
Something that I'm workingthrough, I'll be vulnerable
here.
So just to match with you,something that I'm working
through right now is like withinmy business, realizing my need
to do and to create a business.
Like I'm realizing, I'm like,where is this coming from?
Where is this massive need forthis big business coming from?
Because I, obviously, I'mputting in the effort, but it's
not actually happening.
(25:29):
So there's an incongruentenergetics there, right?
Obviously there's somethingincongruent.
And what I realized was the needto help and the need to provide
and to create was actually atrauma response to feeling
needed to not actually receivethe love and the uncondition of
(25:52):
just being like, who am Iwithout that?
Who am I without that?
And it was very confronting tojust say, I'm gonna put it to
the side right now.
It's a simple word, like I justsaid that, and it probably
doesn't sound that profound, butthat night when I did make that
decision to put my business tothe side for a moment and just
be, I was in my bed on Cha GBTam I, what does this mean?
(26:16):
And I just was like, wow.
Like I had so much of myidentity wrapped in needing to
create and need improve and allthese things, but it was really
came down to me not realizingthat.
Just us as human beings as weare is enough.
Yeah.
And we can hear it over and overand over and over again, but it
does not get through until it'sembodied, until you allow
(26:37):
yourself to feel whatever you'reafraid of.
Like I was afraid of just beinga waitress.
I was afraid of just being.
Who I am right now, even thoughI've done so many things and so
have you.
It comes with the territory, Ifeel of getting sober too.
The want to provide and do andcreate and catch up on time lost
and all those things.
(26:57):
So I think that's such abeautiful realization that you
just had.
Yeah.
What would you say, as thisjourney went on,'cause I've been
watching you, I've seen youdoing the breathing and moving
through the pain.
What other emotions reallyshowed up for you when you
couldn't really outrun them?
Where did it, where did theresistance to the descent,
right?
So going back into the body ofbeing stuck in the slow motion,
(27:20):
where did it break you open?
Obviously one we just sharedabout was huge, but what other
lessons and moments have youfound yourself metabolizing over
this time?
Definitely learning to be still.
That was another thing that Ireceived from the Aktion records
stillness and presence, becauseI was gung-ho, right?
I'm like, okay, this happenedfor a reason.
(27:41):
I'm ready to learn.
Tell me what it is.
What's my lesson?
What were what is it?
And so I just wanted to receiveit.
I'm like, I got nothing to do.
I have nothing but time like Iam your, student teach.
And then it was just likecrickets, and so it was very
frustrating to not be receiving.
It's you made this happen.
Now gimme the answers.
(28:02):
What is it that I have to workthrough?
But, slow and steady has been.
The theme for a lot of this tooslow and steady in the healing.
Slow and steady.
When you get to the next phase,like I was telling you before
now I'm learning to work thisknee scooter, so I am able to be
a little bit more independent.
But even with that, it has to bevery slow and steady.
(28:22):
I have to take my time.
Working with plant medicine,it's going very slow and steady.
Just, receiving the answers,receiving all the, I've been
sitting here for a month and ahalf and just now this one
little, like the little nuggets,they're just, very slow and very
steady.
So that was something that inthe Akash was told to me is just
stillness and presence.
That's all I needed to work on.
(28:43):
And so a part of me was likestillness and presence okay.
I know what they mean, but whatdoes stillness and presence mean
to me?
Show me what that means to me.
So stillness, of course, isgetting out of my head and into
my heart space.
And then just being present formy body.
Like they showed me they showedme like a kid getting an award
(29:04):
at a school and like a, likesomeone being there to just
being there for them.
And it wasn't like a parent, itwas more like a mentor.
So I just was like, okay, so I'mbeing there present for my body.
I need to be present for mybody.
I need to be like a mentor formy body and just being there for
it.
And of course, still I'm justlike I don't really know what
that means, but, so just being.
(29:25):
Patient and allowing thesethings to just come to me in
their own time.
The stillness definitely like myworking with, I'm working with
Iboga right now.
Plant medicine and just verysmall little micro mini, mini
doses, slow and steady.
And it is just interesting too.
Sit back and listen to my mind.
(29:46):
There, I know that there's afear.
Part of me, and I know she runsa lot of the show, and then, but
there's also this busy miss busybody is just and then we gotta
do this, and then we gotta dothis.
And like her mind is just, orher essence of who, whatever it
is just constantly, what's ournext step?
She's always.
Okay.
And then that, and then you, oh,you gotta do that.
(30:07):
And let's, that's beenabsolutely driving me bonkers.
But, so getting into thestillness of just even being
aware, like watching, listeningto all of that, but being
outside of it and just okay.
I see you.
I hear you.
I feel you.
I know what you're doing.
And just being conscious of allof that, not really quite sure
(30:27):
what all these next steps are,but just setting myself into
that awareness of what's goingon in the stillness.
A hundred percent.
And that's one of the first, andfoundations of any type of
healing is becoming aware.
And especially if you do likeIFS, which sounds like you're
doing parts work where you'rejust becoming aware and actively
like non-judgmentally observingthese parts of you that are
(30:49):
running the show a lot of timesand they get triggered in
different situations.
So it would be a cool processfor you to do is to really look
back on.
So when we have any type ofinjury like this, or disease or
symptom, it's a combination ofour core wound, right?
So our childhood trauma, thecore wounds.
It could be from not receivingsomething to an actual big T,
small T, whatever it is, right?
(31:10):
You understand that conceptwhere it's not necessarily what
happened, it's how it processedwithin our body, plus our
current life stressors of wherewe are.
And then that equals yourcurrent state of health or of
disease, right?
What you can do is you can lookback on with those parts and
see, okay, when did this part ofme come online?
What is she protecting me from?
(31:32):
What is she?
How is she my protector?
And allowing yourself to go backinto that energetics of that
body or even just have aconversation with her since you
do a lot of visualization andyou can sit and be present and
allow your soul to speak toreally just see what is it that
she's protecting you from andhow can you provide that
unconditional love to whatyou've learned through this
(31:52):
process now that you know whatthat felt sense is and provide
that for her.
Because in, in the end, likethat's really all we truly want
is that unconditional love andacceptance and the ability to
unravel in front of the personthat we love and the person that
we're receiving that from to beheard, to be seen to be
witnessed and all those things.
Yeah.
(32:12):
So just as a little like sidepiece for you to do that, I
think that you probably find alot of wisdom in that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
'cause she definitely always hassomething going on.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Mine's like my angry inner teen,right?
She's like the, she's the onewho decided at that age as a
teenager to just take control.
(32:34):
Take control of everything, getshit done.
She can't depend on themasculine nor the feminine.
It was like right around thetime that my mom died.
And like it wasn't like an innerchild healing where she's little
and she's playing.
It was more like.
What's up bitch?
What's up?
Like why are you coming to menow?
Okay.
You know what I mean?
It was a lot of sass, right?
It was a lot of talking back.
It was a lot of just, I had tojust stay there and be like, I'm
(32:57):
not leaving.
I know you hate me, but I'm notleaving and I love you and I'm
sorry, and I'm here now and justgive it to me.
What's up?
How do you need me right now?
And it was just profound, doingthat type of work, having the
place and space to do it.
Yeah.
And quietness.
I feel like when we have to sitstill, our soul becomes louder.
When our body becomes quieter,our soul becomes louder.
(33:18):
And like you said, you can hear,you hear more messages.
You're able to receive from thefield when you're in that
parasympathetic state when we'renot moving and grooving.
But also at the same time, a lotof times.
It's when we're not in the mind.
So like you said, when you werewalking and hiking and doing all
those things, or like whenyou're in the shower, when
you're gardening, when you'relike actively doing something
(33:41):
with your hands, that's, thoseare the moments that I usually
receive the most information.
So yeah, driving when I'mdriving, go for a drive.
So with that being said, whatwould you say as you are
returning back again, you'regetting closer to walking again,
(34:01):
who do you feel the personyou're becoming now in this
season compared to who you were?
Where do you feel things aregonna be changing and shifting?
I think, my hope and my plan isto, again, just really taking
things slow.
(34:22):
Not feeling that everything hasto be this rush to get done,
because if I do a million thingsin a 24 hour span, then that day
wasn't a waste of a day.
Or that I wasn't a waste of, amom or a wife or, a facilitator
or, a chef, whatever it is thatI'm doing.
But that just, that there's alot of healing still, like.
(34:45):
Inside of me that needs to bedone, not just in the physical
part, but there's been thisprocess of emotional healing
that has started.
And like I know that has justonly begun.
And somebody ha my neighbor hadmentioned to me too, that in.
They call it like in the fouryear of a spiritual awakening,
(35:07):
like when something, lots ofpeople will have a traumatic
experience usually a physicalexperience and it's like just
something to knock you down andget you where you need to be.
Like.
So I've been on this spiritualawakening journey for about four
years.
And it's going along, but maybenot fully surrendered.
(35:28):
So it's okay.
Boom, there's your crack.
You're sitting down here likeit's time to, to fully
surrender.
Like you get it but you don'tquite get it a thing.
Yeah.
We usually build on top of likewhen we first get into the work,
we build on top of the survivalbody, right?
'cause like we've been insurvival, we're on autopilot in
the beginning, and then webecome very aware and we start
(35:48):
to build on top of that.
And then it's.
There's this initiation thathappens where there's parts of
us that can't come with usanymore, and a lot of times,
like we, we're unaware of it.
It's really it's not likeanything that we can really do
more of.
It's just allowing life toactivate us and allow those
parts to come through anddifferent circumstances and
people will activate thosemoments.
(36:08):
Yeah, it's honestly an honor ofwhat you're going through.
It's just a, it's a sacrificeand it's painful and it's.
The human fucking experience onsteroids.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm, I'm grateful for it forsure.
I still know that there's a lotto learn from what happened, and
I may not get the full,unfolding of it all and this is
(36:30):
why, and I'll have it all laidout.
But like the, the nuggets arecoming.
And I think a lot of it too isjust that fear of being labeled
as lazy.
I was told a lot as a child thatI was lazy, and that's why I
was, fat.
I was a fat, lazy kid.
So just always keeping myself asbusy as possible, so no one.
(36:50):
Looks at me and thinks of me as,being lazy or that I don't think
of myself as being lazy.
Like I just have to keep busy.
But I just, and a lot of, in myaffirmations and things that I'm
working with in this plantmedicine is that, I am worthy
just how I am like that I don'thave to do or move or be, or,
provide or do all these thingsto be a worthy soul like I am
(37:15):
just.
More they just by being here.
Absolutely.
And you are, you a hundredpercent are with the, like the
psychosomatic connection betweenlike with your ankle, you said
it was on your right side.
Yeah.
Legs are usually a it's thetrust in foundation.
So it's a pillar of trust.
(37:35):
So legs represent foundationaltrust in life and movement in
your direction.
So when this area breaks down,it points to a break down in
trust in your path or force topause from moving forward.
And then with your feet that'slike landing in reality.
So they're connected togrounding, stability, direction,
and support from life itself.
So pain or injury usuallyreflects feeling unstable in
(37:58):
life's foundation, career,relationships, identity.
And I feel like all of this,like initiation has touched on
all those things.
Like we've touched on all thoseconver like in this
conversation.
Challenges with moving forwardand crisis of anchoring.
So where am I going?
Is it safe to get there?
So this will bring up your corewounds, right?
You had said something to melike, what's lighting me up
(38:20):
right now is the idea ofwalking.
Again, not just physically, butmetaphorically.
I want to grow from it.
I want to ring every ounce ofwisdom for this, so obviously
that's like textbooks,psychospiritual, recalibration.
So it's gonna touch on your rootwound, which is a, sounds like a
lot from our conversation, likean identity wound, right?
(38:41):
So fears of, I'm not safe, Ican't move forward until I'm
more in control.
It touches on shame.
I should be able to handle this.
I'm not who I thought I waswithout momentum.
It's gonna touch on grief.
So like letting go of what wassupposed to happen.
Morning plans, morningtimelines, mobility,
productivity, and it's gonnatouch on powerlessness.
(39:02):
So I didn't choose this right.
And then allowing you to reallystep into your body agency to
allow yourself to metabolizethose emotions, feel them, allow
them to be there.
And have more agency in thepause.
But in the moment it's gonnafeel like it threatens that
identity of what you've been,living through.
So I find it super fascinating'cause it's always like the
(39:25):
correlations usually are pretty,pretty direct.
And then I think the right isthe masculine side.
So healing the woundedmasculine, which usually is,
because I know I had to healthat a lot.
When I went from my addiction.
I was in the wounded feminine,and then when I got sober, I
moved directly, like I shut downany part of my feminine side and
(39:45):
I moved directly into my woundedmasculine, which was doing
proving, constantly achieving,gotta get more certifications,
gotta do this, gotta do that.
Like heavy lifting, all thosethings.
Yeah.
So it's that initiation intohealing those parts of you.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What you were saying, all ofthat like rings so true, like
the right side and then theankle and the foot and the lay,
(40:06):
like all of that.
And I think that it's so fuckinginteresting too that I was in
Mount Shasta, which is the rootchakra of the world.
Like it has the energy of theroot chakra.
So I just, all of that it'sjust, it's it tracks.
It all tracks.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
(40:26):
What support or wisdom do youhave for anybody who's
experiencing something similarin their life right now?
What, what feels called to movethrough you right now to, to
anybody listening?
I.
Just, I feel like definitelybreathing, like just connecting
(40:48):
to your breath in all aspects ofyour healing journey.
When the physical pain becomestoo much, when the emotional
pain comes too much, to juststop and recognize that you're
holding, that you're, we holdit.
We have to hold it in andholding it in.
It is just, for me, it was likethis is only going to prolong
(41:11):
the healing.
This is only going to stay stuckinside and create issues later.
And so as much as it hurts, Ijust breathe.
Take that breath in and breathethrough and feel it.
Feel the uncomfortable feelingsof what you're going through
(41:33):
emotionally.
Feel the excruciating pain ofthe things that are happening to
your body that like reallyfucking hurt, like just.
Because it, and it makes it gofaster than when you're holding
onto it.
When you're holding on andwanting to have control of it.
Oh, like I'm not, I don't wanna,I don't wanna it lasts longer
(41:55):
than if you surrender and just,and just really feel it.
Yeah, it hurts, but it's notgonna last as long as if you
just let it go through you.
I feel like that is my biggesttakeaway from all of that.
My strongest if I could telleverybody just to just remember
(42:19):
to breathe and take thosebreaths through that journey
that you are feeling.
It's just, it's been everythingfor me.
That's beautiful because itdoesn't just apply to pain or an
injury.
It applies to everything.
Everything.
Discomfort of emotion.
Yeah.
Just breathing through it,allowing yourself to go into
(42:41):
like root, deeper into theemotion.
Allow that to flow through yourather than to, I think the
saying is like, the minute thatyou try to heal to get
something, it stops becomehealing.
So it's just allowing, allowingit to move through.
That's beautiful.
I have some yeah, I have aprompt that I'm gonna ask you
and just complete the sentenceto just close out this ritual of
(43:05):
this conversation with us.
And then, we'll move forwardfrom that.
But it's the somatic truth.
So I'll ask you the question.
I'll just stop and then you canfinish it for me.
So it starts with my body taughtme that I am.
Powerful.
Beautiful.
(43:26):
I used to think healing meant.
Now I know it means, I used tothink that healing meant being
weak, and now I know that itmeans being strong.
(43:47):
Beautiful.
Let this be a reminder toeverybody that healing doesn't
always look like movement.
Sometimes the most sacredforward motion is staying
exactly where you are and justlistening.
So listening and allowing, andlike Stacy said, breathing into
it.
We touched on so much talkingabout receiving an unconditional
(44:08):
love, allowing surrendering,allowing the anger to come
through too.
Like you, I think that youreally have portrayed that
beautifully, how it's okay tofeel like it sucks because it
does, but it's also okay tobalance that out with also
knowing that it sucks.
I'm a human.
This is painful.
And then also.
I know that there's wisdom inthis and just really anchoring
(44:30):
in and allowing and surrenderingover and over again.
I don't know.
I just think that's gonna be sobeautiful for people.
So seriously.
Thank you Stacy.
How can people get in touch withyou?
You are welcome.
Thank you.
I am on Facebook.
I have the Embodied Collectivepage.
And then on Instagram, I'm juststill SML Bennett.
(44:53):
I also have a website that is inthe process of being
constructed, so hopefullythat'll be done soon.
But that's also, that'll be theembodied collective.com.
Perfect.
Amazing.
To anybody that feels called toreach out to Stacy, please do.
You have.
So much wisdom and you're suchan amazing soul.
Like I said being able to bondwith you at the retreat that we
(45:15):
were at a couple months ago justmeant the world to me.
And being able to hold space foryou in this moment and hear
everything that you've learnedand just to see how much you've
changed from this really I wannawitness you right now the
strength that it's taken andalso the strength to allow
yourself to unravel and just.
Allow it to move through you isbeautiful and I just can't wait
(45:36):
to see what comes from this, toreally see that.
Sending you so much love andgiving you a big virtual hug
right now.
But thank you so much for comingonto the episode.
Thank you so much.
I'm so grateful that you evenhad me.
I've told you a million times.
Just you're the smartest, mostbrilliant and eloquently spoken,
(45:59):
poetic, beautiful soul that I'veever met in my entire life, and
I could just sit and listen toyou speak for hours and hours.
I receive that.
I receive that.
I take that in.
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
We're gonna check outta here andhopefully you got something
outta this today, and
you'll find all the links in theshow notes below, and if this
(46:20):
episode cracks something open inyou, share it, text it to a
friend, post it to your stories,or write a review on Apple or
Spotify.
It means the world and it helpsthis medicine reach more women
who need it.
Until next time, stay embodied,stay curious, and remember,
healing isn't about fixingyourself.
It's about finally coming home.
(46:42):
I love you mean it, and I'll seeyou next week
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