February 21, 2025 • 27 mins
Day of Events: February 21, 2024
What a lying deceitful asshole. At least, that's my opinion of him. Though I'm definitely not alone in that opinion, here's one of many reasons why I am justified in that opinion....
I accepted his offer to let me file, days later, he congratulated me on doing it, thanked me for being "on it" but he had already filed... what a liar. what kind of small, manipulative person must you be to get joy out of something like that? Pathetic, right? So sad.
Underscores that I made the right choice.
His deceit blindsided me and rattled me a bit but you'll see that it takes more than that to keep me down- my creator and angels had plenty of messages for me letting me know that they had my back!! When God is for me, who can be against me? No one- not one single person.
Scarlett Davis
Facebook: Future Single Lady
email: FutureSingleLady@gmail.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:01):
You want to go on a trip?
You want to travel?
Take a journey?
Have an adventure?
Well then come along with mebecause this is me.
This is the chronicles of myjourney.
Emotional, mental, physical,financial, um, pretty much, and
(00:24):
spiritual I guess, um, prettymuch in just about every way
that you can have a journey.
This is me.
on my journey as I journey frombeing in a relationship of about
20 years with two almost adultchildren into life as a single
(00:45):
lady.
It's crazy.
It is often more times than I'dlike to admit straight up
absurd, but you're welcome.
You're welcome to it.
You're welcome to join me onthis, on this journey.
I hope you do, and I hope thatyou were entertained, because
(01:06):
the purpose of this podcast,aside from just being a little
bit of mental and emotionalrelief for me, one is I hope
that I'm reaching at least oneperson out there who needs this
as much as I do.
That said, basically thispodcast is for entertainment
(01:30):
purposes only.
I'm not a counselor.
I'm not any kind of anythingqualified to give advice, or
whether it's medical, emotional,mental, nope.
I don't have any of those piecesof paper that say I'm qualified
to do any of those things.
(01:51):
I am just a person.
I am a person who happens to bea woman, who is a hairdresser,
is a therapist of massage, Andjust a person who has lived life
and has some sometimes uniqueperspectives on things.
So entertainment purposes, noqualifications to give any kind
(02:18):
of advice.
I'm just a woman and ahairstylist, so that means that
I talk a lot.
So welcome to my podcast.
This is Future Single Lady andthat's me, Scarlett Davis.
I love you and I'm glad you'rehere.
Okay, it's about to get moredramatic.
(02:38):
Starts off a little, uh,mundane.
So, February 21st, 2024.
I start off in the morning, andI had, and so here's my journal
entries.
I'm going to gloss over some ofthis because some of it just
doesn't make any sense, and itdoesn't, uh, it doesn't really
matter.
Basically, I say I had somedreams last night, at least one
that I remember.
Turns out that it was actuallyprobably two dreams that I
(03:00):
remembered, and I I make thenote here that I think basically
it was just amalgamations ofwhat has been going on lately
and um, so I and I kind of listthose things that Had been going
on and how I think that theyactually fed into my dreams as
far as just coming together inone crazy story the stuff that
(03:23):
really matters is I got emailssent to my lawyer for temporary
orders The desired end resultthe family budget emails there
are 11 of these family budgetemails and on it They span a
couple of years We'll get backto that later around a year's
worth of checking and savingsaccount statements credit cards
comes next and irs I need tosend those to my husband also
(03:46):
And the bill pay information thetrade of the day is resilient as
well as strong and successfulHappy face.
I am so happy double exclamationmark happy face.
Ah Now things to now time to getready for the dentist and I also
Want to know why my alarms areshutting off after I alert dot
dot dot sleep was nice But Iwanted to be up and doing my
(04:08):
thing Exclamation mark.
Today is the walkout from schooland since my son's MEPS was
postponed he's here to do it.
Prayers, heart, sunshine, emoji.
Side note, there was an issue atthe school and a lot of the
students were very upset andthey wanted to do a walkout.
My husband and I have alwayssupported our children and that
if this is something that youfeel like you need to do, not
(04:30):
just in this topic but in otherthings, if there is something
that you feel you need to do andyou feel really strongly about
it.
We will support you, but youhave to be prepared to face the
repercussions, okay?
We don't know what that, whatthose are, and when appropriate,
we will, we will defend you tothe best of our ability, but you
know, we, we aren't in controlof everything, so there's
(04:51):
consequences to all actions, andif you're going to take actions,
whatever they are, be preparedto face the consequences, and if
you don't take action onsomething, be prepared to face
those consequences becausesometimes we do need to take
action, and a lack of action canbe just as detrimental as
standing up.
Anyway, continuing on.
(05:13):
5 on 9 pm.
So this is a an entry later onthat day.
Blindsided.
The lying bastard filed.
Process server tried doing herjob today.
Smiley face.
Also read the email about himnot paying bills.
The bank changed their website,which was frustrating.
And then my hairstylist friendwouldn't listen to me about my
(05:34):
hair.
I broke down.
I barely made it to my truck,praying all the while.
Then numbers 18 and 18, um, cameimmediately and 17 and 17.
I Googled at the light 18embrace the shift with embrace
the shift only with changes.
Can we progress also one equalsa high level.
(05:58):
Divinity in eight is infinity.
So one in eight, that's actuallylike a really good thing.
Happy face.
17, take responsibility for yourchoices.
Even though you haven'tnecessarily done anything wrong,
you have more influence overyour life patterns than you
think.
Chance for positive change.
Okay, Kesha's woman comes tomind.
(06:21):
I'm a motherfuckin woman, baby,that's right.
I'm a motherfucker.
So no more crack cry.
Then, the number 242.
Quote, rely on your skills.
Try to eradicate bad influencesthat might, might something in
(06:42):
your future.
So be optimistic.
Change your fortune in life.
Okay.
Smiley face.
Thank you, creator.
I receive and apply this.
So I apologize that I didn'tgive credit to, to where, uh,
the sources of that informationwas.
It was somewhere on Google.
And judging by what I put onhere, they were probably little
(07:03):
paragraphs that I screenshotted.
I will see if I could findthose.
I make no promises.
I also have to give credit to myformer stepdaughter for
introducing me to Kesha's womanwhenever she first shared
Honestly, this is one of thethings that I miss about her.
She and I had We liked to talkabout music and pop culture and
(07:23):
stuff, and she felt compelledone day to introduce me to this
song.
She was, I think, a senior inhigh school at the time, and she
said, I want you to hear thissong.
She said, it's got a lot ofcurse words in it, but it's the
intent behind it, and I thinkthat you would actually like it.
I said, okay.
And of course, as a parent whois hearing a song that's with
(07:44):
all of these F bombs in it, lotsand lots of F bombs, I,
basically, I was, I went intoparent, parenting mode, or I was
stayed, stayed in parentingmode, something like that, and I
was like, that's veryinteresting.
Thank you for sharing that withme.
That's got.
A little too many expletives init for me, but thank you.
And I could tell that she wasdisappointed that that was my
(08:06):
reaction.
And honestly, part of me in myhead goes back in time and
erases that and just thanks herand says, thank you for
introducing me to this songbecause it is a really powerful
song.
And later on, I got to sharethat with my daughter.
We, we went to a Girl Scoutevent out of, there was about an
(08:27):
hour out of town and As we wereleaving, the song had popped up
in the thing and as being nextand I paused it and I said, Okay
baby, I said, here's the thing,I said, I have this song and
your big sister actuallyintroduced me to it.
I said, it's got, it's got a lotof wordy ders in it.
(08:48):
It's got the F bomb in it a lot.
And I said, but I appreciate theintent.
Behind which the Kesha issinging this.
She's talking about being astrong powerful woman, and she
is owning her life and And Isaid I really like that I said
now it also talks about weed andyou know that that's not
(09:09):
something that that I reallyapprove of but I appreciate
where this person is coming fromas she she says that I said so I
would really like to jam out tothis song and I Uh, I would like
to share it with you, but pleasedon't judge me.
Is that okay?
And she was like, okay, mom.
Well, we loved it so much thatwe, we blasted it twice as we're
(09:31):
driving down the road, as we're,we waited to leave the Girl
Scout event before we startedblasting it.
Uh, also just as with manythings, the views that I
embraced at the time that I was,Engaging in these activities and
the time that I was journalingthese activities do not
(09:53):
necessarily reflect the viewsthat I have now people change
people learn people grow andJust because I was one way five
years ago or a year ago doesn'tmean that I'm the same way today
So if you want to judge me, thenthat's fine.
Judge me Because truthfully theonly judgment I really care
about it is from my creator AndI'm pretty sure that even though
(10:15):
God is Within all of us, I'mpretty sure you individually are
not the one who created me.
So, yeah, we're all littlecreators.
I don't think we are THE creatorthough.
So, I'm not concerned aboutanyone's judgment.
(10:37):
Negative judgment might make mylife a little bit more difficult
at some point, but if God bringsme to it, then God will bring me
through it.
Just like he did with thisdivorce.
And that's what we're talkingabout today.
So that's my thing.
This is, this is, uh, okay, letme, let me go back blindsided.
Here is why and how I wasblindsided.
So if we go back several days inthis and we see, this is
(11:00):
February 21st.
So sometime around February 13thor 14th.
I actually took my, I took, Icanceled clients and I took the
time to work on this and when myhusband at the time came home,
he said, you know, I'm reallyglad to see that you're working
on this because if you waitedtoo long to file, then I was
(11:22):
going to, I was going to fileahead of time or I was going to
tell my attorney to just goahead and he said, I wasn't
going to wait.
So I'm, I'm glad to see thatyou're working on it.
Okay, great.
And somewhere in there, I'dgiven him the update that, uh,
that, you know, there's apossibility I may be able to
file for free and, andeverything and save the 400
(11:43):
bucks and this and that.
And he's like, well, that'sgood.
That's good.
Well, little did I know that thelying bastard had already
instructed his attorney to file.
And it occurs to me, Thatpossibly the reason that he
(12:05):
keeps putting on the legaldocuments that everything
started on February 14th, 2024.
I think that was actually thedate that his attorney filed.
I could be wrong and if I am,God knows it wouldn't be the
(12:26):
first time and I seriously doubtit'll be the last time.
I don't know.
But I think that's thesituation.
So here we have a perfectexample of how this manipulative
narcissist came in and said onething and completely did
(12:46):
another.
So to you, my friend.
His secrets, his attitudes, andhis practices are being
revealed, and if they haven'tbeen revealed to his friends and
family and the people close tohim yet, they will be.
It's just a matter of time, andthis is why I can say with all
authority that his secrets willbe revealed, and that the crap
(13:10):
that he's doing, he might begetting his way for now, but it
won't last forever.
Just, oh, and uh, the reasonthat I was filing was because he
asked me When we had the, theinitial discussing discussion,
he said, do you want to followor do you want me to follow?
I said, I'll file.
(13:32):
Which years ago, whenever I waspregnant and we had had an
issue, I swore to him that Iwould never file that.
I believed in marriage too muchand, and everything else.
And that if things ever got thatbad, I would let him file.
I would let him because webelieved supposedly erroneously
that whoever files that thingsare automatically in their
favor.
(13:56):
Lawyers say that there's, thatthere's no truth to that.
Maybe there is, maybe thereisn't.
I really don't care.
I thought there was at the time,but don't know, don't care.
And I'm making a note that whenI was pregnant with our son and
we, almost split then actuallykind of for a night or for a few
(14:19):
hours we kind of did.
I'm making a note that that isprobably a story that that needs
to be told because that was alsothe same time I think that he
accused me of going out andgiving another man a blow job.
Mm hmm, yeah.
(14:39):
Red flags all over the place.
Hindsight is 20 20, right?
What else, what else?
Um, okay, so he, he filed aprocess server, tried to do her
job, and the reason that I foundthat out is because she went to
my home where my son was there,and he had a habit of not
answering the door if it was notsomebody that he knew, so good
(15:00):
for him.
But there was a business cardleft on the, or maybe she had
said something on the doorbell,I don't recall, but there was a
business card left there, and sohe took a picture of it, and he
texted it to his dad and myself,and then I inadvertently sent a
text, I was so flustered by thisthat I inadvertently sent a text
(15:23):
that was intended to myattorney, but it went to my
almost ex, or soon to be ex,that was like, does this mean
that he filed?
Well, yeah, that's exactly whatit meant.
So, so basically, okay,congratulations to him.
He got a little kudos.
Um, he, he got a little goldstar for himself.
That little feather in his cap.
(15:43):
That, yes, he got one over onme.
So, congratulations! Way to go,asshole! You're the Captain
Dickhead of the day! You must beso proud of yourself.
And yeah, you know what you maysay that I'm going over the top
and that I'm being a bitch aboutit with this name calling And
stuff like that, but honestly,these are the kinds of things
that go through my head this ishow Not how I feel About being
(16:09):
lied to it was the fact that Iwas Lied to it was purposeful He
was purposefully deceptive Hewas being like a puppeteer and
pulling strings to elicitcertain responses from people
And if you think that that's notsomething that is worthy of
commentary like what I'm giving,okay, that's fine, you don't
(16:32):
have to agree with me, but thepoint is this is my story.
This is how I felt about things.
These are about my emotions as Iam going through these things,
as I got blindsided.
So if you don't agree with me,that's fine.
If everybody agreed oneverything, the world would be a
pretty boring place.
And if you do agree with me, andyou empathize and sympathize
(16:53):
with me, then thank you.
I, I really appreciate yoursupport because it's not nice
when we get a negative shockerlike that, is it?
I don't think anybody enjoysthose kinds of things.
It makes for some interestingdrama, but it doesn't mean that
we enjoy it.
I mean, I know that some peopleThrive on that and they
(17:15):
purposefully create drama likehe did in this case, but that's
not my cup of tea.
I prefer a much more calm, zen,peaceful, kind, spiritual kind
of thing.
I would, you will hear from metime and time again that I
(17:36):
believe we rise by liftingothers.
And that's part of the reasonfor this podcast because if
there is anybody going throughanything Like what I went
through Then I want to lift youup If you have a friend who is
going through something andmaybe you just don't understand
what it is They're going throughor why they're behaving the way
(17:58):
they do Maybe they're up andthey're down and they're just
super crazy one minute and calmthe next Well, maybe they're
having an experience like mine.
I mean, this is a great Youexample here.
In one paragraph, I go frombeing, Oh my gosh, what the
fuck?
To, you know, and describing my,my mental breakdown as I'm going
(18:21):
through this about how I havebeen deceived.
I thought that we were goingthrough things peacefully.
We were doing things good.
And he completely fuckingblindsided me.
He lied to me.
He purposefully engaged indeceptive practices.
Holy.
Fuck.
And there I am trying not tobreak down and ball in public.
(18:46):
And then because my eyes areopened to signs and I
immediately see some signs thatsay, it's okay, sweetheart,
you're doing a good thing.
You're doing, you're goingthrough these things because of
the choices that you made andthey weren't bad choices.
These are just some of theconsequences of your choices of
(19:07):
your actions.
Okay.
Deep breath.
All right.
Don't have to bawl my eyes outanymore.
Um, the tools that I need to,to, to get in, uh, to get
through this are here.
Keep a good attitude.
As my mom says, keep your chinup, baby girl.
All right.
(19:28):
All right.
This is all for the greatestgood.
Be thankful.
And, and by the Bible tells usthat in all circumstances, give
thanks.
And I've been known to remindpeople of this that no matter
how down and out you are itcould always be worse So be glad
That you are where you are Ormaybe that this is the darkness
(19:50):
that you just got to get throughto get to the light that's on
the other side And I I keep myeye on the prize.
I Want to get through thistunnel of darkness so I can I
can get to the light on theother side because that's my
goal So attitude of gratitudeAnd I, I will refer to this,
(20:10):
this one sign that's in myaunt's kitchen all the time that
says an attitude of gratitudeturns what we have into enough.
So get, so yes, give thanks inall circumstances.
So receiving these blessings andapplying these things, being
reminded of these situations,being thankful because my eyes
(20:34):
are open to seeing some signs.
Yes, yes, absolutely.
I, I endeavor to do that all daylong, all the time, every day.
It doesn't mean I'm alwayssuccessful, but this is, that
was a hell of a roller coaster,right?
And I did that in one paragraphon this page, and that was just,
(20:55):
um, a small portion of my day.
So, I think we see anothertwist, another turn here.
Mm hmm.
And I think you're beginning tosee If you didn't already Just
how deceptive and that youprobably are agreeing with me
(21:16):
that yes This person absolutelyis an asshole and I hope I feel
like you're telling meCongratulations scarlet for
taking the steps and starting toget the fuck out of here because
yes You need to be away fromthat that person.
I'm so very thankful.
Also that I had somebody reachout to me last night She she
used to be a client.
She Is Basically, it was it wasone of those dills a friend of a
(21:39):
friend of a friend You know,that's how you make connections
with with people sometimes andshe will just say that she has
not been in my life and over adecade other than a couple of
random messages on on Facebookand but she was always a
beautiful wonderful sweet kindinfluence in my life and She
(22:00):
reached out to me yesterday andshe said Scarlett.
Are you okay?
She goes, I woke up in themiddle of the night thinking
about you.
And I just want to know, are youokay?
I hope this message finds yousafe and sound.
Please let me know.
And I messaged her back rightaway.
Yes, I'm good.
And she asked if I was stillliving in Portland, Texas, that
is.
(22:21):
And, uh, I told her, I said, I'mgood and I don't live in
Portland.
I live in Aransas Pass becausethat's where I moved after the
divorce and I launched mypodcast this week and, you know,
this is some, and she said, I'mgoing to look for it.
And even though I know thatsomebody had, had, uh, at least
(22:41):
one, I think probably two peoplehad listened or at least
downloaded some episodes before.
Right after that, there were alot more episodes downloaded and
she sent me a beautiful messageand said, Scarlett, it was so
good to hear your voice and yourlaughter.
You sound good.
I look forward to hearing moreof this.
And she told me that I needed tobe doing audio books and stuff.
(23:04):
And I said, thank you, because Ireally want to do that.
I want to be a voice actor.
So, a lot of blessings here, andI'm thankful that my friend
reached out to me.
I I Feel like and she told meshe said well, that must be what
(23:26):
what the Holy Spirit was tellingme was you know basically to
reach out to me in in this way,but um This is life, this is my
life It's sometimes crazysometimes sometimes Not as
enjoyable, but truthfully, it'salways good because even the
(23:48):
stuff that's not so good Helpsget me through and gets me to
the good stuff Right This is agreat example of what we look
for we find I could focus on thenot so good parts and be where
where where it's not so goodpoor me Woe is me blah blah.
You know what?
I just don't fucking care.
That's not who I am I'm a personwho You At least in this space,
(24:14):
this is a safe space for mebecause I'm not having to look
anybody in the eye.
And honestly, I can go throughand edit out stuff if I want to.
And truly, I just listened to,well, I was hearing, uh, my
computer was playing one of thelast episodes and I, I used some
really foul language, languageto describe how, or one reason
(24:36):
why.
The person I was married toshould be sharing information
with me before sharing it withhis mummy and it was really foul
and I'm I feel embarrassed byit, but that was Really basic
just that's just how reallybasic that I felt that this
(24:56):
should be an obvious thing anobvious decision a reason why
and To be treated with suchdisrespect was just But I
apologize because I feel like Idisrespected you in my extreme
potty mouth attitude.
But this is me, and I am sayingthings as, as I feel.
(25:19):
So, that's all the more reasonthat it is unedited.
It, it, the thought occurred tome that I could go in and I
could insert an apology in thereor whatever, but nope.
Nope, I'm not doing it becausethis is real, this is authentic,
and the more it's edited, theless of the true me that you're
getting.
So there you go.
(25:43):
I love you.
I truly appreciate you beinghere with me and all that's
going on.
You're amazing.
And I hope that whatever you'regoing through, that you feel
Uplifted, that you feelcherished and loved because
everyone deserves to feel that.
(26:04):
I hope you feel solid groundbeneath you, encouraging you to
walk taller, walk strong, to befaithful in the steps that
you're taking.
Not fearful.
Be confident.
Be a motherfuckin woman, baby,that's right.
(26:27):
Motherfucker.
Mm hmm.
And that's my story for today.
There are a lot of stories, alot of different days, a lot of
different ways, lots of ways forthings to go, and sometimes it's
just a shift in perspective thatchanges the narrative.
So that's why I'm herenarrating, because you will
(26:51):
sometimes hear my perspectiveshift as I narrate, and it
changes the story.
So.
I hope you like it.
I hope you enjoy.
Stay tuned.
You want to go on a trip?
You want to travel?
Take a journey?
Have an adventure?
Well then come along with mebecause this is me.
This is the chronicles of myjourney.
Emotional, mental, physical,financial, um, pretty much, and
(00:24):
spiritual I guess, um, prettymuch in just about every way
that you can have a journey.
This is me.
on my journey as I journey frombeing in a relationship of about
20 years with two almost adultchildren into life as a single
(00:45):
lady.
It's crazy.
It is often more times than I'dlike to admit straight up
absurd, but you're welcome.
You're welcome to it.
You're welcome to join me onthis, on this journey.
I hope you do, and I hope thatyou were entertained, because
(01:06):
the purpose of this podcast,aside from just being a little
bit of mental and emotionalrelief for me, one is I hope
that I'm reaching at least oneperson out there who needs this
as much as I do.
That said, basically thispodcast is for entertainment
(01:30):
purposes only.
I'm not a counselor.
I'm not any kind of anythingqualified to give advice, or
whether it's medical, emotional,mental, nope.
I don't have any of those piecesof paper that say I'm qualified
to do any of those things.
(01:51):
I am just a person.
I am a person who happens to bea woman, who is a hairdresser,
is a therapist of massage, Andjust a person who has lived life
and has some sometimes uniqueperspectives on things.
So entertainment purposes, noqualifications to give any kind
(02:18):
of advice.
I'm just a woman and ahairstylist, so that means that
I talk a lot.
So welcome to my podcast.
This is Future Single Lady andthat's me, Scarlett Davis.
I love you and I'm glad you'rehere.
Okay, it's about to get moredramatic.
(02:38):
Starts off a little, uh,mundane.
So, February 21st, 2024.
I start off in the morning, andI had, and so here's my journal
entries.
I'm going to gloss over some ofthis because some of it just
doesn't make any sense, and itdoesn't, uh, it doesn't really
matter.
Basically, I say I had somedreams last night, at least one
that I remember.
Turns out that it was actuallyprobably two dreams that I
(03:00):
remembered, and I I make thenote here that I think basically
it was just amalgamations ofwhat has been going on lately
and um, so I and I kind of listthose things that Had been going
on and how I think that theyactually fed into my dreams as
far as just coming together inone crazy story the stuff that
(03:23):
really matters is I got emailssent to my lawyer for temporary
orders The desired end resultthe family budget emails there
are 11 of these family budgetemails and on it They span a
couple of years We'll get backto that later around a year's
worth of checking and savingsaccount statements credit cards
comes next and irs I need tosend those to my husband also
(03:46):
And the bill pay information thetrade of the day is resilient as
well as strong and successfulHappy face.
I am so happy double exclamationmark happy face.
Ah Now things to now time to getready for the dentist and I also
Want to know why my alarms areshutting off after I alert dot
dot dot sleep was nice But Iwanted to be up and doing my
(04:08):
thing Exclamation mark.
Today is the walkout from schooland since my son's MEPS was
postponed he's here to do it.
Prayers, heart, sunshine, emoji.
Side note, there was an issue atthe school and a lot of the
students were very upset andthey wanted to do a walkout.
My husband and I have alwayssupported our children and that
if this is something that youfeel like you need to do, not
(04:30):
just in this topic but in otherthings, if there is something
that you feel you need to do andyou feel really strongly about
it.
We will support you, but youhave to be prepared to face the
repercussions, okay?
We don't know what that, whatthose are, and when appropriate,
we will, we will defend you tothe best of our ability, but you
know, we, we aren't in controlof everything, so there's
(04:51):
consequences to all actions, andif you're going to take actions,
whatever they are, be preparedto face the consequences, and if
you don't take action onsomething, be prepared to face
those consequences becausesometimes we do need to take
action, and a lack of action canbe just as detrimental as
standing up.
Anyway, continuing on.
(05:13):
5 on 9 pm.
So this is a an entry later onthat day.
Blindsided.
The lying bastard filed.
Process server tried doing herjob today.
Smiley face.
Also read the email about himnot paying bills.
The bank changed their website,which was frustrating.
And then my hairstylist friendwouldn't listen to me about my
(05:34):
hair.
I broke down.
I barely made it to my truck,praying all the while.
Then numbers 18 and 18, um, cameimmediately and 17 and 17.
I Googled at the light 18embrace the shift with embrace
the shift only with changes.
Can we progress also one equalsa high level.
(05:58):
Divinity in eight is infinity.
So one in eight, that's actuallylike a really good thing.
Happy face.
17, take responsibility for yourchoices.
Even though you haven'tnecessarily done anything wrong,
you have more influence overyour life patterns than you
think.
Chance for positive change.
Okay, Kesha's woman comes tomind.
(06:21):
I'm a motherfuckin woman, baby,that's right.
I'm a motherfucker.
So no more crack cry.
Then, the number 242.
Quote, rely on your skills.
Try to eradicate bad influencesthat might, might something in
(06:42):
your future.
So be optimistic.
Change your fortune in life.
Okay.
Smiley face.
Thank you, creator.
I receive and apply this.
So I apologize that I didn'tgive credit to, to where, uh,
the sources of that informationwas.
It was somewhere on Google.
And judging by what I put onhere, they were probably little
(07:03):
paragraphs that I screenshotted.
I will see if I could findthose.
I make no promises.
I also have to give credit to myformer stepdaughter for
introducing me to Kesha's womanwhenever she first shared
Honestly, this is one of thethings that I miss about her.
She and I had We liked to talkabout music and pop culture and
(07:23):
stuff, and she felt compelledone day to introduce me to this
song.
She was, I think, a senior inhigh school at the time, and she
said, I want you to hear thissong.
She said, it's got a lot ofcurse words in it, but it's the
intent behind it, and I thinkthat you would actually like it.
I said, okay.
And of course, as a parent whois hearing a song that's with
(07:44):
all of these F bombs in it, lotsand lots of F bombs, I,
basically, I was, I went intoparent, parenting mode, or I was
stayed, stayed in parentingmode, something like that, and I
was like, that's veryinteresting.
Thank you for sharing that withme.
That's got.
A little too many expletives init for me, but thank you.
And I could tell that she wasdisappointed that that was my
(08:06):
reaction.
And honestly, part of me in myhead goes back in time and
erases that and just thanks herand says, thank you for
introducing me to this songbecause it is a really powerful
song.
And later on, I got to sharethat with my daughter.
We, we went to a Girl Scoutevent out of, there was about an
(08:27):
hour out of town and As we wereleaving, the song had popped up
in the thing and as being nextand I paused it and I said, Okay
baby, I said, here's the thing,I said, I have this song and
your big sister actuallyintroduced me to it.
I said, it's got, it's got a lotof wordy ders in it.
(08:48):
It's got the F bomb in it a lot.
And I said, but I appreciate theintent.
Behind which the Kesha issinging this.
She's talking about being astrong powerful woman, and she
is owning her life and And Isaid I really like that I said
now it also talks about weed andyou know that that's not
(09:09):
something that that I reallyapprove of but I appreciate
where this person is coming fromas she she says that I said so I
would really like to jam out tothis song and I Uh, I would like
to share it with you, but pleasedon't judge me.
Is that okay?
And she was like, okay, mom.
Well, we loved it so much thatwe, we blasted it twice as we're
(09:31):
driving down the road, as we're,we waited to leave the Girl
Scout event before we startedblasting it.
Uh, also just as with manythings, the views that I
embraced at the time that I was,Engaging in these activities and
the time that I was journalingthese activities do not
(09:53):
necessarily reflect the viewsthat I have now people change
people learn people grow andJust because I was one way five
years ago or a year ago doesn'tmean that I'm the same way today
So if you want to judge me, thenthat's fine.
Judge me Because truthfully theonly judgment I really care
about it is from my creator AndI'm pretty sure that even though
(10:15):
God is Within all of us, I'mpretty sure you individually are
not the one who created me.
So, yeah, we're all littlecreators.
I don't think we are THE creatorthough.
So, I'm not concerned aboutanyone's judgment.
(10:37):
Negative judgment might make mylife a little bit more difficult
at some point, but if God bringsme to it, then God will bring me
through it.
Just like he did with thisdivorce.
And that's what we're talkingabout today.
So that's my thing.
This is, this is, uh, okay, letme, let me go back blindsided.
Here is why and how I wasblindsided.
So if we go back several days inthis and we see, this is
(11:00):
February 21st.
So sometime around February 13thor 14th.
I actually took my, I took, Icanceled clients and I took the
time to work on this and when myhusband at the time came home,
he said, you know, I'm reallyglad to see that you're working
on this because if you waitedtoo long to file, then I was
(11:22):
going to, I was going to fileahead of time or I was going to
tell my attorney to just goahead and he said, I wasn't
going to wait.
So I'm, I'm glad to see thatyou're working on it.
Okay, great.
And somewhere in there, I'dgiven him the update that, uh,
that, you know, there's apossibility I may be able to
file for free and, andeverything and save the 400
(11:43):
bucks and this and that.
And he's like, well, that'sgood.
That's good.
Well, little did I know that thelying bastard had already
instructed his attorney to file.
And it occurs to me, Thatpossibly the reason that he
(12:05):
keeps putting on the legaldocuments that everything
started on February 14th, 2024.
I think that was actually thedate that his attorney filed.
I could be wrong and if I am,God knows it wouldn't be the
(12:26):
first time and I seriously doubtit'll be the last time.
I don't know.
But I think that's thesituation.
So here we have a perfectexample of how this manipulative
narcissist came in and said onething and completely did
(12:46):
another.
So to you, my friend.
His secrets, his attitudes, andhis practices are being
revealed, and if they haven'tbeen revealed to his friends and
family and the people close tohim yet, they will be.
It's just a matter of time, andthis is why I can say with all
authority that his secrets willbe revealed, and that the crap
(13:10):
that he's doing, he might begetting his way for now, but it
won't last forever.
Just, oh, and uh, the reasonthat I was filing was because he
asked me When we had the, theinitial discussing discussion,
he said, do you want to followor do you want me to follow?
I said, I'll file.
(13:32):
Which years ago, whenever I waspregnant and we had had an
issue, I swore to him that Iwould never file that.
I believed in marriage too muchand, and everything else.
And that if things ever got thatbad, I would let him file.
I would let him because webelieved supposedly erroneously
that whoever files that thingsare automatically in their
favor.
(13:56):
Lawyers say that there's, thatthere's no truth to that.
Maybe there is, maybe thereisn't.
I really don't care.
I thought there was at the time,but don't know, don't care.
And I'm making a note that whenI was pregnant with our son and
we, almost split then actuallykind of for a night or for a few
(14:19):
hours we kind of did.
I'm making a note that that isprobably a story that that needs
to be told because that was alsothe same time I think that he
accused me of going out andgiving another man a blow job.
Mm hmm, yeah.
(14:39):
Red flags all over the place.
Hindsight is 20 20, right?
What else, what else?
Um, okay, so he, he filed aprocess server, tried to do her
job, and the reason that I foundthat out is because she went to
my home where my son was there,and he had a habit of not
answering the door if it was notsomebody that he knew, so good
(15:00):
for him.
But there was a business cardleft on the, or maybe she had
said something on the doorbell,I don't recall, but there was a
business card left there, and sohe took a picture of it, and he
texted it to his dad and myself,and then I inadvertently sent a
text, I was so flustered by thisthat I inadvertently sent a text
(15:23):
that was intended to myattorney, but it went to my
almost ex, or soon to be ex,that was like, does this mean
that he filed?
Well, yeah, that's exactly whatit meant.
So, so basically, okay,congratulations to him.
He got a little kudos.
Um, he, he got a little goldstar for himself.
That little feather in his cap.
(15:43):
That, yes, he got one over onme.
So, congratulations! Way to go,asshole! You're the Captain
Dickhead of the day! You must beso proud of yourself.
And yeah, you know what you maysay that I'm going over the top
and that I'm being a bitch aboutit with this name calling And
stuff like that, but honestly,these are the kinds of things
that go through my head this ishow Not how I feel About being
(16:09):
lied to it was the fact that Iwas Lied to it was purposeful He
was purposefully deceptive Hewas being like a puppeteer and
pulling strings to elicitcertain responses from people
And if you think that that's notsomething that is worthy of
commentary like what I'm giving,okay, that's fine, you don't
(16:32):
have to agree with me, but thepoint is this is my story.
This is how I felt about things.
These are about my emotions as Iam going through these things,
as I got blindsided.
So if you don't agree with me,that's fine.
If everybody agreed oneverything, the world would be a
pretty boring place.
And if you do agree with me, andyou empathize and sympathize
(16:53):
with me, then thank you.
I, I really appreciate yoursupport because it's not nice
when we get a negative shockerlike that, is it?
I don't think anybody enjoysthose kinds of things.
It makes for some interestingdrama, but it doesn't mean that
we enjoy it.
I mean, I know that some peopleThrive on that and they
(17:15):
purposefully create drama likehe did in this case, but that's
not my cup of tea.
I prefer a much more calm, zen,peaceful, kind, spiritual kind
of thing.
I would, you will hear from metime and time again that I
(17:36):
believe we rise by liftingothers.
And that's part of the reasonfor this podcast because if
there is anybody going throughanything Like what I went
through Then I want to lift youup If you have a friend who is
going through something andmaybe you just don't understand
what it is They're going throughor why they're behaving the way
(17:58):
they do Maybe they're up andthey're down and they're just
super crazy one minute and calmthe next Well, maybe they're
having an experience like mine.
I mean, this is a great Youexample here.
In one paragraph, I go frombeing, Oh my gosh, what the
fuck?
To, you know, and describing my,my mental breakdown as I'm going
(18:21):
through this about how I havebeen deceived.
I thought that we were goingthrough things peacefully.
We were doing things good.
And he completely fuckingblindsided me.
He lied to me.
He purposefully engaged indeceptive practices.
Holy.
Fuck.
And there I am trying not tobreak down and ball in public.
(18:46):
And then because my eyes areopened to signs and I
immediately see some signs thatsay, it's okay, sweetheart,
you're doing a good thing.
You're doing, you're goingthrough these things because of
the choices that you made andthey weren't bad choices.
These are just some of theconsequences of your choices of
(19:07):
your actions.
Okay.
Deep breath.
All right.
Don't have to bawl my eyes outanymore.
Um, the tools that I need to,to, to get in, uh, to get
through this are here.
Keep a good attitude.
As my mom says, keep your chinup, baby girl.
All right.
(19:28):
All right.
This is all for the greatestgood.
Be thankful.
And, and by the Bible tells usthat in all circumstances, give
thanks.
And I've been known to remindpeople of this that no matter
how down and out you are itcould always be worse So be glad
That you are where you are Ormaybe that this is the darkness
(19:50):
that you just got to get throughto get to the light that's on
the other side And I I keep myeye on the prize.
I Want to get through thistunnel of darkness so I can I
can get to the light on theother side because that's my
goal So attitude of gratitudeAnd I, I will refer to this,
(20:10):
this one sign that's in myaunt's kitchen all the time that
says an attitude of gratitudeturns what we have into enough.
So get, so yes, give thanks inall circumstances.
So receiving these blessings andapplying these things, being
reminded of these situations,being thankful because my eyes
(20:34):
are open to seeing some signs.
Yes, yes, absolutely.
I, I endeavor to do that all daylong, all the time, every day.
It doesn't mean I'm alwayssuccessful, but this is, that
was a hell of a roller coaster,right?
And I did that in one paragraphon this page, and that was just,
(20:55):
um, a small portion of my day.
So, I think we see anothertwist, another turn here.
Mm hmm.
And I think you're beginning tosee If you didn't already Just
how deceptive and that youprobably are agreeing with me
(21:16):
that yes This person absolutelyis an asshole and I hope I feel
like you're telling meCongratulations scarlet for
taking the steps and starting toget the fuck out of here because
yes You need to be away fromthat that person.
I'm so very thankful.
Also that I had somebody reachout to me last night She she
used to be a client.
She Is Basically, it was it wasone of those dills a friend of a
(21:39):
friend of a friend You know,that's how you make connections
with with people sometimes andshe will just say that she has
not been in my life and over adecade other than a couple of
random messages on on Facebookand but she was always a
beautiful wonderful sweet kindinfluence in my life and She
(22:00):
reached out to me yesterday andshe said Scarlett.
Are you okay?
She goes, I woke up in themiddle of the night thinking
about you.
And I just want to know, are youokay?
I hope this message finds yousafe and sound.
Please let me know.
And I messaged her back rightaway.
Yes, I'm good.
And she asked if I was stillliving in Portland, Texas, that
is.
(22:21):
And, uh, I told her, I said, I'mgood and I don't live in
Portland.
I live in Aransas Pass becausethat's where I moved after the
divorce and I launched mypodcast this week and, you know,
this is some, and she said, I'mgoing to look for it.
And even though I know thatsomebody had, had, uh, at least
(22:41):
one, I think probably two peoplehad listened or at least
downloaded some episodes before.
Right after that, there were alot more episodes downloaded and
she sent me a beautiful messageand said, Scarlett, it was so
good to hear your voice and yourlaughter.
You sound good.
I look forward to hearing moreof this.
And she told me that I needed tobe doing audio books and stuff.
(23:04):
And I said, thank you, because Ireally want to do that.
I want to be a voice actor.
So, a lot of blessings here, andI'm thankful that my friend
reached out to me.
I I Feel like and she told meshe said well, that must be what
(23:26):
what the Holy Spirit was tellingme was you know basically to
reach out to me in in this way,but um This is life, this is my
life It's sometimes crazysometimes sometimes Not as
enjoyable, but truthfully, it'salways good because even the
(23:48):
stuff that's not so good Helpsget me through and gets me to
the good stuff Right This is agreat example of what we look
for we find I could focus on thenot so good parts and be where
where where it's not so goodpoor me Woe is me blah blah.
You know what?
I just don't fucking care.
That's not who I am I'm a personwho You At least in this space,
(24:14):
this is a safe space for mebecause I'm not having to look
anybody in the eye.
And honestly, I can go throughand edit out stuff if I want to.
And truly, I just listened to,well, I was hearing, uh, my
computer was playing one of thelast episodes and I, I used some
really foul language, languageto describe how, or one reason
(24:36):
why.
The person I was married toshould be sharing information
with me before sharing it withhis mummy and it was really foul
and I'm I feel embarrassed byit, but that was Really basic
just that's just how reallybasic that I felt that this
(24:56):
should be an obvious thing anobvious decision a reason why
and To be treated with suchdisrespect was just But I
apologize because I feel like Idisrespected you in my extreme
potty mouth attitude.
But this is me, and I am sayingthings as, as I feel.
(25:19):
So, that's all the more reasonthat it is unedited.
It, it, the thought occurred tome that I could go in and I
could insert an apology in thereor whatever, but nope.
Nope, I'm not doing it becausethis is real, this is authentic,
and the more it's edited, theless of the true me that you're
getting.
So there you go.
(25:43):
I love you.
I truly appreciate you beinghere with me and all that's
going on.
You're amazing.
And I hope that whatever you'regoing through, that you feel
Uplifted, that you feelcherished and loved because
everyone deserves to feel that.
(26:04):
I hope you feel solid groundbeneath you, encouraging you to
walk taller, walk strong, to befaithful in the steps that
you're taking.
Not fearful.
Be confident.
Be a motherfuckin woman, baby,that's right.
(26:27):
Motherfucker.
Mm hmm.
And that's my story for today.
There are a lot of stories, alot of different days, a lot of
different ways, lots of ways forthings to go, and sometimes it's
just a shift in perspective thatchanges the narrative.
So that's why I'm herenarrating, because you will
(26:51):
sometimes hear my perspectiveshift as I narrate, and it
changes the story.
So.
I hope you like it.
I hope you enjoy.
Stay tuned.
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