September 4, 2025 • 32 mins
What if the key to healing isn't just what you do, but who you're being? In this thought-provoking conversation, Denise and Kira unravel the powerful connection between personality, identity, and transformation.
We explore Dr. Joe Dispenza's insight that "your personality creates your personal reality" and how shifting at the identity level (becoming the person who embodies the health, peace, or abundance you seek) is the foundation of lasting change. Drawing from our own years-long journeys, we share honest reflections on the non-linear path of transformation and why so many people give up before seeing results.
The conversation delves into practical approaches for identity shifts, from awareness practices and emotion regulation to self-forgiveness when you inevitably slip into old patterns. We discuss the importance of focusing on one significant identity shift at a time and offer specific techniques anyone can implement—even while sleeping!
Follow us on Instagram, leave a review, and share your experiences – we'd love to hear what resonates with you!
Follow our Instagram page
Follow Kira on IG
Follow Denise on IG
Click here to download Kira's free self-love hypnosis audio or her free gut guide
Book a consult with Kira: https://www.anourishedlifenutrition.com/services
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Welcome to the Heal Yourself Podcast, where we dive
deep into all things healing.
I'm Denise, a speech-languagepathologist and a self-love
coach for adults and teens.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
And I'm Kira, a traditional naturopath and
functional nutritionist, andwe're here to guide you through
the transformative process ofhealing your body, mind and soul
From the latest in functionalmedicine.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Of healing your body, mind and soul From the latest
in functional medicine tonurturing your relationship with
yourself, healing trauma andeven transforming your money
story.
We're here to empower you withthe knowledge and tools to
create lasting change.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
So, whether you're looking to heal physically,
emotionally or spiritually, joinus as we explore the many paths
to wholeness and wellness.
Hello everyone, welcome back toanother episode of Heal
Yourself Podcast.
Today you have Kira and Denise,and we're talking about two fun
(01:01):
subjects that tie togetherpersonality and identity.
About two fun subjects that tietogether personality and
identity.
Speaker 1 (01:06):
I know when we thought about it because, like I
have, I was like are they thesame?
Like, to me, identity is moreabstract.
Personality is like everybodytalks about, like, if you tell
somebody personality, they aregoing, I think, to understand it
more than when you say identity.
Some people will be like oh,what are you talking about?
Speaker 2 (01:23):
more than when you say identity, some people will
be like, oh, what are youtalking about?
And when I left you a messageto me, they are still different,
but they're together and maybethey are the same.
We're just presenting them asdifferent ways.
So I want you to tell me whatdo you think of with personality
?
Because when I think of that,I'm like, oh, this person's nice
, or you have a quietpersonality and that's it.
(01:44):
And it's like, okay, well, whatdoes that have to do with
healing?
So I know you were doing somereading or something with Wayne
Dyer.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
It was somebody, no, joe Dispenza, okay, okay, okay,
I switch.
But you know, you know how I am.
I go back and forth between,like, mentors and stuff like
that, and recently I've beenresonating a lot with Joe
Dispenza and what really, um, Iam going through some rough
patch right now.
So what really resonated withme is because I have heard the
(02:12):
identity, identity shift,identity shift.
But to me and again I'm gonnabe I'm gonna be very transparent
, very honest.
English is not my firstlanguage, right, and I, I'm an
immigrant.
So I came in to the countrywhen I was 17 years old and I
speak four languages, right.
So there is, there would besome like, what does that mean?
Like whatever.
So to me, identity was reallyabstract.
(02:34):
So if I'm going to tellsomebody like, who is 20 or 21
years old, you, in order to healyou gotta, you gotta, you gotta
change your identity and shiftyour identity, they're going to
probably look at me like, whatare you talking about?
But personality, because it'smore mainstream, right?
So Dr Joe Dispenza says yourpersonality creates your
(02:56):
personal reality.
Okay, your personality createsyour personal reality.
So if you're not loving yourpersonal reality, you got to
change that personality.
And to me personality is, yes,someone being nice, someone
being kind, but also, to me,feels like the personality,
because you know how, likesometimes I'll tell you like if
(03:17):
someone gets mad, right awaythey're like well, this is me,
that's my personality, that's mypersonality.
Or they overreact, or they Idon't know they overgive, for
example, like they over overlygive and they don't replenish.
Oh, that's my personality.
I'm a giver, right.
So to me, this is what Iunderstand and it makes a lot of
(03:38):
sense, like, wait a minute.
So changing my personality tochange my personal reality is
also changing the way I react tothings, the way that I speak,
the way that I use the words andthe way that I stay within my
truth.
I believe you know what I mean.
(03:59):
Yeah, that's how I interpret it, with my own language
differences, because you knowsomeone who is an immigrant and
is exposed to several languages.
There is a subtlety inunderstanding the languages and
the vocabulary and to interpretit.
(04:21):
Does that make sense?
Speaker 2 (04:22):
It does English teacher, ma'am, it does.
And the thing is is maybe thereis a subtle difference.
I don't even care at this point.
You know what I mean Like.
The point is, we want to sharewith you this aspect that's so
important and I view it asidentity, and I'll tell you guys
what I think, because again, wemight, we might be speaking the
same language, just you knowdifferently, whatever.
(04:43):
But to me identity is who am Ibeing?
So I'll use myself as anexample.
Years ago, I identified assomeone who had IBS, right, it's
not like I would lead with that.
I wasn't proud.
In fact, that was embarrassing.
I didn't just tell people hey,I have IBS, Nice to meet you.
But it was like that was a bigpiece of my identity.
(05:05):
I identified as someone whodealt with ongoing digestive
issues, right, and that wouldplay a role in how I showed up
in the world.
Well, I don't know if I canschedule this event, because
what if digestive issues kick inand I have to run to the
restroom?
It's going to be embarrassing.
Or I mean, I can use an example.
I've been honest about this onetoo.
(05:26):
I am a recovering perfectionist, Like I could be saying.
I'm trying to set boundaries,but I have to rewrite that
identity.
I have to become a person whohas boundaries, because if I'm
showing up in the world assomeone who still doesn't have
boundaries but I'm saying, well,I'm trying to set them, it
doesn't work.
So I do think we're saying thesame thing.
(05:48):
And this is such an importanttopic because everyone listening
is on some type of healingjourney, whether it's physical,
body, emotional, whatever.
You cannot change until youchange at the identity or
personality level.
You have to.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
Absolutely, absolutely.
And and then you know and youand I have talked about it
especially that we've been doingthe work, because sometimes,
like, yes, we want to Amazonprime everything.
And we have been doing the worksince 2018, you and I, 2018,
2019.
And just recently, I told you Ifinally achieved emotional
(06:26):
intelligence.
Um, you know, among chaos, Ifinally can stand in my truth.
But how do I achieve that?
That's not overnight, right?
So, same thing I talked to mydaughter about yesterday, so I'm
going to talk about, you know,like it's the subtlety of, like,
doing the work, showing up anddoing it little by little, and
some days you're not going to beable to show up, and some days
(06:46):
you are going to to, to, youknow, maybe react differently or
like the old, the old ways orwhatever, but it will all click
the more that you do the work,little by little, every single
day.
And then you look, you're like,wait a minute, wait a minute,
(07:10):
wow.
Like I can definitely right nowbe in my truth and be and say
things differently or reactdifferently or not react,
because I have been doing thework.
It does.
It will come, like you know, itwill come back to you.
It's just that it takes timeand it takes you showing up
every single day.
You can't just say well, I havebeen meditating for a year,
I've been meditating, I've beenjournaling for a year and a half
(07:31):
and things are not happening.
But guess what?
The work is not going to waste,because it will solidify and it
will come to fruition the moreyou do it and you show up.
But I do also want to mention oh, I was telling my daughter the
same thing, because she keptsaying, you know, she beats
herself up a lot about dancing.
And we're talking about ityesterday and we kind of like
(07:54):
were able to like be a littlebit truthful and I told her.
I said you know, but you alsolike right now, just about a
year or two ago, you decided tofocus more in the dance classes,
you decided to put more effortin.
So you can't expect theimprovement to happen overnight
because guess what, allthroughout the other years, you
(08:15):
weren't as focused, you weren'tas determined, you were fooling
around.
Sometimes in classes, you weresocializing more than you were
paying attention.
And then you look around,you're like wait a minute, why
am I still right here?
It's because you know.
Now you decided to put in theeffort and guess what?
It is going to take time, butdon't give up, and that's
another thing.
A lot of people give up beforethey see the fruits.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
And they didn't adopt that personality or identity,
right?
So when I first heard that term, like I think it was around
money.
Right, like you wanna createwealth to have the identity.
No, you've got to collapse timeor act as is.
(08:59):
And I'm like so am I supposedto walk into a store and buy
something really expensive?
I didn't understand that.
It was abstract.
But even with what you'resaying about your daughter, if
she identified as a dancer, ifthat was her personality I'm
going to use the termsinterchangeably how would she
show up in the world?
If she was like I'm an amazingdancer, she would be responsible
(09:24):
, committed, integral, likeshowing up for these, practicing
all the time.
It's the same thing in everyaspect of your life, right, I'm
not just going to say healthhere.
It could be in your finances,your relationships.
(09:46):
Like, how am I showing up?
Do I say every day, oh my gosh,I feel so sick.
What am I going to do?
Do I need another supplement?
Do I need to go see anotherdoctor?
You are identifying as a sickperson Absolutely.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
And I think I found a little subtle difference.
Because same thing when youwere saying, if I'm showing up
as I'm an amazing dancer, andwhat do the amazing dancers do?
They practice, they show up,they try, etc.
Same thing with health, let'stalk about health.
If you're saying, let's say youwant to say, oh, I need to
drink a lot of water, that's notan identity shift.
(10:14):
However, when you identify I'ma healthy person, what does a
healthy person do?
Well, a healthy person drinkswater.
A healthy person eats wholefoods.
A healthy person walks orwhatever, or exercises, etc.
Or like you, for example, withthe boundaries, I am going to
show up.
Or like, for example, with me,I am going to show up as an
(10:36):
entrepreneur, as someone whoowns the company, versus because
I contract with schools, right,so sometimes they may view you
as an employee and you're not.
So I am showing up, I am abusiness owner.
So it's not just in my words,it is in the actions and how I
talk to people and how I presentmyself in meetings, et cetera.
(10:57):
So I feel there is a differencebetween the identity versus
personality, right, so theidentity is the core.
Like I am a healthy person, Iam a person who has boundaries.
I am abundant, an abundantperson.
I'm not talking abundance likehaving millions in the bank.
No, you can be abundant.
I mean you have food in thefridge, you have a car, you have
(11:18):
a cell phone, et cetera.
You are abundant.
You look outside and you seeflowers.
You are abundant.
So if you're showing up as anabundant person, how does an
abundant person think, how doesan abundant person talk?
Right?
And then you have thatpersonality where we're used to
like you know the impulse or theemotions or how we react to
things.
So that will be part of thepersonality.
(11:40):
You know.
That can be shifted when youidentify with that new identity
shift.
Yeah, you know what I mean.
Instead of I'm a sick person, Ihave IBS, I'm a healthy person.
Because I'm a sick person, Ihave IBS.
What do you?
How do you show up?
You're going to make excuses.
(12:01):
You're not going to go to yourfriend's event because, guess
what, you may flare up, right.
But when you say I'm a healthyperson, you're going to show up
differently in the world.
Hence this will affect thepersonality and how you also
react to things and how youpresent things and how you talk
to others and to yourself, andyeah, that well well, and that's
the thing we already knowthoughts, emotions, all that
creates our reality.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
So if we're identifying as this sick person,
as this broke person, aswhatever it might be, whatever
these stories are, you're goingto keep attracting that back
because your thoughts and youremotions and all that create
reality.
And the thing is is I want togo back to the act, as if
because I heard that a lot yearsago it's not an overnight thing
(12:42):
, like I'll use your daughter asan example again with dancing.
She's not just going to for oneweek.
Be like I'm so committed, I'mgoing to show up and I'm going
to be an amazing dancer nextweek.
It is an ongoing process withlittle baby steps, just like if
you've been chronically sick, Idon't expect you to overnight be
like I'm so healthy.
(13:03):
You're not going to believe that.
Why on earth would you believethat if you felt like crap for
decades?
But it's little tiny things of.
I am committed, I amresponsible, I'm going to show
up and I'm going to tell myselfI am working on being a healthy
person.
So those words matter and Iknow we've done episodes on this
.
But then it's the little shiftsthat go with that that change
(13:24):
the identity of.
Okay, if I am that healthyperson, how do I show up in the
world?
How do I act?
How do I treat others?
You can start to make thosesubtle shifts without being like
, oh yeah, I feel reallyfreaking amazing right now.
Speaker 1 (13:39):
Right, or and I love how you're touching based on
that, because act as if it cancan get interpreted and
perceived differently and samewith same with me.
I didn't understand it, but Ijust love the way that you
explained it.
You know, acting as if it's notlike, oh so I'm, I'm acting as
if I'm rich, I'm going to go toCartier and then buy something
and put it on the credit card.
(14:00):
That's not acting as if right,because it can be misinterpreted
, but I really love the way thatyou explained it and it does
exactly.
And nothing happens overnight.
Nothing happens overnight,exactly.
You can't just expect yourselfto be healthy or eat healthy for
a week and guess what?
Speaker 2 (14:38):
no-transcript, all of those things leading up to that
.
If you had a crap ton ofstories from generations, good
luck.
You know, one session ofmeditation is probably not going
to not going to do much.
Speaker 1 (14:56):
Exactly.
No, no, no, no, you did it,it's fine.
No, I love how we're doing thatbecause it's just it's how we
build, and I really love how wedo things because we do come
from different backgrounds,different experiences, and we
bring all that in to the podcastand to how we interpret things,
because, guess what, what we'resaying has been said, it's not
like we're saying has been said.
It's not like we're saying likethings that are new.
However, we're saying how weare applying it to our own
(15:20):
experiences, and it does taketime.
I'm telling you like I swearI've been.
How many times have I told youI want to achieve peace among
chaos?
I really want to, and and I'vebeen working since my on my
mindset, on myself, since 2018,and it was never linear, like,
oh, I'm going up, up, up, it wasall over the place, but finally
(15:40):
I reached a place where, wow,there's chaos happening around
me and I'm not losing myemotions and my control.
I mean, like, sometimes I mayand you're human right.
Speaker 2 (15:53):
We're not gonna, we're never gonna be perfect
however.
Speaker 1 (15:56):
However, I'm bringing back myself to balance right
away.
Like it's, it's.
It's so phenomenal to be like Idon't know how to explain it,
but it just everything isclicking.
But they didn't start.
So I cannot come and say, oh,you know, it's just clicking,
everything is great, I, I like,I'm, I'm peaceful among chaos,
whatever.
(16:16):
But I need to tell, I need totell you know, our listeners,
that it's been years of showingup, of doing the work, of, of
you know and and hating the workand yelling at the work and be
like what the heck is going on.
Why can't it?
What can it happen?
And then you listen to otherpodcasts and other people.
Oh, life is roses and daisies,which is great.
Yes, life is roses and daisies,which is great.
(16:37):
Yes, life is roses and daisies.
But you are putting in the work, you're putting in the effort,
little by little, these smallshifts, small shifts, small
shifts.
And that's why we're talkingabout the not giving up, because
a lot of people will be like,fuck it, I've been eating
healthy.
How many of your clients may dothat?
Right, oh, I've worked withKira, or I've worked with
(16:59):
several practitioners and I'vedone everything but they were
not healthy at an identity level.
I'm just throwing that outexactly, but that's another
thing.
You, sometimes, a lot of us,you and I have done it before.
We have given up, maybe beforefruition comes in, but then we
were like you know, we talkedamongst each other and you know,
whatever.
But it's really, reallyimportant to just stay on your
(17:22):
path and I believe determinationand not giving up on yourself
is something that this is true,self unconditional love, loving
yourself even, even even whenyou are betraying yourself.
And that's what I tell myself.
Even when I find myselfbetraying myself, I just always
say I love you, I love you somuch.
(17:43):
I know that I did this.
Please forgive me.
I'm going to do better in thenext moment, because life is
moment by moment and that's howyou make the shift.
It's not?
Oh, you know, I'll start onMonday.
I'll start on Tuesday.
I'll start on Monday.
I'll start on Tuesday.
I'll start on, you know, newYear's Day or whatever, which is
great, but those don't get youany.
(18:03):
I mean, yeah, yeah, I mean theydo like for a little bit, but
you got to put in the effortevery single day, every single
day.
And even when you achieve it,guess what?
You're going to want more.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
Yeah, and then you dig deeper and that's how we got
into shadow work and theidentity thing is a daily thing.
I had a sticky note on mylaptop for the last 12 months no
joke, it's finally gone.
But it said am I being and thatwas me reminding myself at an
identity level for everythingI'm doing?
Who do I want to be in thisworld and do I have the identity
(18:37):
that matches what I'm after?
And many times it was no.
Speaker 1 (18:41):
Absolutely, and I know you and I leave messages to
each other all the freakingtime Sometimes, I know with you,
boundaries is a big thing foryou, and you had a situation
just recently, not too long ago,and we talked through it and
again you examined what am Ibeing, et cetera.
So it's really, reallyimportant to constantly analyze
(19:03):
it, to constantly, you know, um,also to constantly like, really
look within and takeaccountability, because, at the
end of the day, it is all you.
Speaker 2 (19:13):
It is all you, it's all you it is, and that's what I
was going to say is whateveryour goal is and don't have
5,000 goals right.
It's not to be rich, it's notto have amazing relationships,
it's not to be healthy, like,pick one, pick one thing right
now that would make your lifebetter.
And that's where you start withidentifying how's my
personality around that and ismy identity matching the person
(19:35):
that needs to be to get thatresult, if that makes sense?
Speaker 1 (19:39):
And forgive yourself when you, when you react, um,
like the old personality, itdoesn't matter, it's fine.
Forgive yourself, cause what wedo, sometimes we dwell over it
Like, oh my goodness, like, forexample, my daughter let's go
back to my daughter oh mygoodness, mommy, I've been, I
put in so much effort, I triedand I'm like, but you just like,
literally started practicinglike two days ago.
(20:00):
You know what I mean.
So it's you know, like it isimportant to also remind
yourself and be gracefulthroughout.
Right, it's like, okay, fine, Ifucked up.
This time, you know, I forgivemyself.
However, I'm going to try andalways do it moment by moment,
because our life is present,moment.
It is now, and I know we'vetalked about it, we have, um, an
(20:22):
episode about that, but it'sreally, it's the.
It's literally the momentsyou're driving in the car and
let's say, you want peace, right, and then you're driving and
then someone, someone doessomething and you, freaking,
have the road rage, right, soreact it as your old personality
.
I know you and I do that allthe time.
But if this is, you know,something like, for example, I'm
working on peace, I'm like,okay, fine, you cut me.
(20:43):
Okay, okay, god bless you, rightInstead of like, instead of you
know the middle finger, I know,instead of oh, I dropped the
microphone instead of going intothe road rage like this is a
simple example, right?
Or for example, let's say youare identifying, you're changing
identity about I am healthy,which is basically showing up
(21:05):
and drinking water, exercising,eating whole foods.
And let's say you know, guesswhat?
You go to the movies and youeat nachos.
Right, it's not the end of theworld.
Speaker 2 (21:13):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
It's okay Like go forgive yourself the world.
Yes, it's okay like go forgiveyourself.
But a lot, of, a lot of us,what we do is we beat ourselves
down so much that we um, what isit which?
Like, um, I don't know what I'mtrying to say, but we beat
ourselves so much that we um,counter what we are actually
working on.
You know what I mean.
Like it's fine, I get it.
(21:35):
You ate the nachos, okay, fine,sometimes healthy people eat
nachos.
It's gonna be okay yeah, and Ifeel that sometimes and correct
me if I'm wrong, kira becauseeverybody on the Instagram on
the Instagram.
Speaker 2 (21:45):
I just say Instagram.
I love it.
Speaker 1 (21:47):
We have a new term over here on the internet, on
social media, they're portrayingthese beautiful like oh, the
jets and the health and therelationships and the this.
I know you're rolling your eyesbut I feel like I mean.
But again, I'm not saying theydon't have, but I'm saying guess
(22:09):
how much work they've done toget there.
So don't compare your day oneto their 100 or 200.
Like you know, like everybodytalks about Mr Beast and like
dude, he even going oninterviews saying he freaking,
was posting every single day andno one was watching.
But guess what?
He did not give up.
He did not give up and he keptgoing.
And he kept going even when noone's watching.
(22:30):
Even with us look at us.
Even if no one's listening,guess what?
You and I are still showing upand are still recording.
You know what I mean.
Let's say, whether even we haveone listener or one download,
we celebrate that because thisone download could lead to more
and more and more.
And we're still showing up.
We didn't say, oh, you knowwhat, I give up, we only had
(22:52):
this amount in a year.
We are doing something wrong.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
Kira, we need to stop .
Speaker 1 (22:57):
We didn't, so that's really important.
To just continue, stay on yourfreaking path, and it's your
path.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
Well, and you guys know Denise is usually the one
with the short, actionable tips.
But I've got a few things forshifting this, because it does
sound obscure to change yourpersonality or your identity,
and I know that there's a subtledifference.
That's fine, but I think you'vegot to recognize how to do that
.
So my first thing is again,figure out what that identity is
(23:28):
right.
If you're working towardsoptimal health, how would I show
up in the world if I am ahealthy person?
So first thing is awareness.
Like catch what you're tellingyourself oh my gosh, I'm always
sick.
Oh, I always feel like crap, Ihate my body, whatever it is
like.
Catch that and then askyourself questions and I know
(23:49):
we've touched on this before butis that true?
Is that true?
You're always going to be sickfor the rest of your life?
Does that serve you?
And then start to shift.
Who can that future self beright?
For some of you you might belike I'm already eating healthy
and drinking the water, denise,I'm doing all the things, but
your mind might not be therebecause you're always going back
(24:12):
to the I'm sick, I feel likeshit, I hate my body, whatever
it is.
So you have to look at if I washealthy Even in joking.
Speaker 1 (24:21):
I want to mention yes , even joking.
Speaker 2 (24:23):
Yeah.
So how would I show up in theworld?
How would I talk to myself?
How would I talk to others?
What would I do with my day?
So it doesn't just have to beoh, it's the healthy eating.
No, think through what thatwould be.
Who would you need to be andshow up as, and keep doing that?
And then sometimes there needsto be some integration.
(24:43):
Sometimes you really need towork on the nervous system.
If you've been on overdrive,because that is the state of
your body and you got to shiftit out.
Sometimes you got to journal.
Sometimes you got to shift itout.
Sometimes you got to journal.
Sometimes you got to walk, likeDenise and I always talk about.
Sometimes you need anaccountability buddy, like
something.
But you got to work throughthese steps to start to shift at
that identity and personalitylevel.
Speaker 1 (25:05):
My tip is I love yours and definitely this is the
first step.
And because we always talk andnot just us, you know our
subconscious level.
It is a negative bias.
Right, I'm not the only one whosaid that and our subconscious
is 95 of our.
You know reality, so I thequick, actionable steps.
(25:27):
You're going to sleep anyway,right?
So choose, uh, whether it'ssubliminal messages or night
meditations that are working onthose values, and just listen to
that yeah like.
I mean, you're gonna sleepanyway, you're gonna fall asleep
anyway, whether you want to putthe headphones in your ears or
I know kira doesn't like that oryou want to, um, just put it on
(25:49):
alexa or put it in your room.
But I understand, because ifyou're sleeping with a partner
or with the kids or something wedon't know what your situation
is you can definitely have gethealthy headphones.
Like kira said, I I use airpods, so I'm not going to pretend
that I don't and I know she'sshaking her head, but, um, but I
really think this, definitelybecause it's behind the scenes
(26:11):
that you're not even thinkingabout, because you're already
sleeping, it's, and a lot ofthem are free on YouTube, so you
do not need a fancy app andthen just look up.
You know, um, whatever,whatever you are working toward,
whether it is, you know, morepeace, abundance, uh, whatever,
whatever, whatever, and I amgoing to also touch base on so
this is, this is a veryactionable step that you can do
(26:31):
while you're sleeping, that youdon't even have to think about
it and then it starts.
But, but don't think it'shappening overnight.
It is going to take time and um, yeah, and you said the
awareness, this one, and Iwanted to say another one that I
totally forgot.
Speaker 2 (26:46):
That's okay.
One thing I will one of my lastthings I'll say is you
mentioned self-love and I dothink that's important.
So I want to remind you guys,if you're really struggling to
shift at the identity level orthe personality there is a
disconnect there with theself-love go back and listen to
episode two, which is all aboutself-love, and Denise was
(27:06):
talking about subliminal.
I don't have subliminal.
However, I do have a freeself-love hypnosis download so
you could totally download thatand listen to it twice a day for
several weeks as a way to startto reprogram and that will make
things easier to shift at theidentity level.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
Yeah and um and then, but don't, but please don't
work on everything at once.
Nope, I remember.
I remember what I wanted to say.
It's also the emotions, right?
So the emotions are, you know,triggering.
So I also, I know we recorded alot on emotions.
So another actionable step iswhatever you want to feel like,
let's say, peace, abundance, etcetera, et cetera Start
(27:44):
practicing these emotions, evenif it is once a day, closing
your eyes, putting your hand onyour heart and taking a few deep
breaths, because also, this isfree, it doesn't require any
apps.
And then just what?
If you're working on you know,having joy or peace, no matter
what, or whatever the emotionsyou want to achieve.
You know, just close your eyesfor a little bit, have a few
(28:05):
deep breaths and say what doesfeeling joy feel like, what does
feeling peace feel like?
And just imagine it through thebreaths.
So what you're doing, also, youare interrupting, um, and you
are teaching your body as wellwhat it feels like to be joyful,
what it feels like to bepeaceful, etc.
Etc.
(28:25):
And I cannot stress enough I,you know, I've been working on
that piece for a long ass time,girl, a long ass time.
And eventually, once things getrolling.
I will talk about it veryopenly.
However, I cannot stress enough.
I've been working on it for somany years and now there is
plenty of chaos, plenty of chaosaround me, plenty, and you know
(28:48):
that and you know that.
And but deep down, I am sopeaceful and I'm so in tune to
the um, to the divine, to God,that every time I stop messing
with my brain, the analyticalwhat, every time the analytical
brain and analytical mind kicksin to convince me otherwise,
(29:12):
something happens in my reality,to show me that guess what?
You're on the right path, honey, literally, literally.
And I've wished for that, Iwish for that, I would.
I would hear people say that,oh, you know, God is speaking to
me or I can feel it.
I feel it.
I feel it every single time.
(29:33):
The analytical mind comes in toconvince me Otherwise, which
right now I call it the devil,because you know, in each one of
us there's a God and there's adevil.
God kicks in right away in themysterious ways, but why?
I'm aware and my eyes are open.
Speaker 2 (29:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
Oh, I love that.
But that took years and yearsof showing up and not giving up.
But it was not linear, it wasup and down, which?
Is how healing is right and butI definitely want to like share
this because you and I likesometimes you and I would say
we've been doing the rightthings.
We've been doing everythinglike why this is that happening?
Speaker 2 (30:11):
give it time it will happen.
Speaker 1 (30:13):
It will happen.
So it kind of gives me like youknow, please, like whenever
you're looking at social orlistening to people on podcasts,
that they tell you so manythings, just like us, just know
that behind the scenes we did alot of work, a lot of painful
work, yep, so so my guys yeah,oh, my goodness, I mean, yeah, I
(30:36):
love talking about this.
I wouldn't even look at thescript, I don't even know what
we're going to say, something.
Speaker 2 (30:41):
We never have a script, guys.
We might have some bulletpoints on a yeah, but I mean,
you guys know the drill.
We we are found through reviewsand I didn't realize that.
So I just want to reiteratethat we would love if this
resonates with you.
We would love a five-starreview.
We would love your words onthere with it, and then find us
(31:04):
on Instagram.
I know we're not great aboutour Instagram page, but leave us
a message.
That's identity.
Look at that, I caught it withidentity I wasn't, I wasn't
gonna lie, but I'm owning it.
We're owning it, we're takingaccountability, but we're on
there and we're active and weread messages.
So if there's any topic youwant us to discuss or bring an
(31:25):
expert in, please let us know,and then I know we keep, you
know, subtly dropping some hintsabout something coming.
It is, it's coming, it's coming.
Speaker 1 (31:35):
It's just life.
I mean, you're homeschoolingyour kid.
Oh, this is something new to me.
I'm going through something youknow, really also new to me.
So it will take time, but weare working on it, we're talking
about it and we are going toput it out in the world.
But please, meanwhile,especially with today, download
(31:56):
um kira self-love hypnosis.
It is free um, get it done.
We also are working on um likea landing page for our podcast,
so we can start um, you know,notifying you of good things.
But yes, please, please, please, if you resonate with this,
send it to a friend, leave us areview with your words, because
it will, you know, kind of.
You know, because a lot of likeyou and I are so real, I feel
that more people um can connectwith us because we're not coming
(32:16):
from the like you know, somighty.
Okay, guys.
Speaker 2 (32:22):
See you on the next episode.
Welcome to the Heal Yourself Podcast, where we dive
deep into all things healing.
I'm Denise, a speech-languagepathologist and a self-love
coach for adults and teens.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
And I'm Kira, a traditional naturopath and
functional nutritionist, andwe're here to guide you through
the transformative process ofhealing your body, mind and soul
From the latest in functionalmedicine.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Of healing your body, mind and soul From the latest
in functional medicine tonurturing your relationship with
yourself, healing trauma andeven transforming your money
story.
We're here to empower you withthe knowledge and tools to
create lasting change.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
So, whether you're looking to heal physically,
emotionally or spiritually, joinus as we explore the many paths
to wholeness and wellness.
Hello everyone, welcome back toanother episode of Heal
Yourself Podcast.
Today you have Kira and Denise,and we're talking about two fun
(01:01):
subjects that tie togetherpersonality and identity.
About two fun subjects that tietogether personality and
identity.
Speaker 1 (01:06):
I know when we thought about it because, like I
have, I was like are they thesame?
Like, to me, identity is moreabstract.
Personality is like everybodytalks about, like, if you tell
somebody personality, they aregoing, I think, to understand it
more than when you say identity.
Some people will be like oh,what are you talking about?
Speaker 2 (01:23):
more than when you say identity, some people will
be like, oh, what are youtalking about?
And when I left you a messageto me, they are still different,
but they're together and maybethey are the same.
We're just presenting them asdifferent ways.
So I want you to tell me whatdo you think of with personality
?
Because when I think of that,I'm like, oh, this person's nice
, or you have a quietpersonality and that's it.
(01:44):
And it's like, okay, well, whatdoes that have to do with
healing?
So I know you were doing somereading or something with Wayne
Dyer.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
It was somebody, no, joe Dispenza, okay, okay, okay,
I switch.
But you know, you know how I am.
I go back and forth between,like, mentors and stuff like
that, and recently I've beenresonating a lot with Joe
Dispenza and what really, um, Iam going through some rough
patch right now.
So what really resonated withme is because I have heard the
(02:12):
identity, identity shift,identity shift.
But to me and again I'm gonnabe I'm gonna be very transparent
, very honest.
English is not my firstlanguage, right, and I, I'm an
immigrant.
So I came in to the countrywhen I was 17 years old and I
speak four languages, right.
So there is, there would besome like, what does that mean?
Like whatever.
So to me, identity was reallyabstract.
(02:34):
So if I'm going to tellsomebody like, who is 20 or 21
years old, you, in order to healyou gotta, you gotta, you gotta
change your identity and shiftyour identity, they're going to
probably look at me like, whatare you talking about?
But personality, because it'smore mainstream, right?
So Dr Joe Dispenza says yourpersonality creates your
(02:56):
personal reality.
Okay, your personality createsyour personal reality.
So if you're not loving yourpersonal reality, you got to
change that personality.
And to me personality is, yes,someone being nice, someone
being kind, but also, to me,feels like the personality,
because you know how, likesometimes I'll tell you like if
(03:17):
someone gets mad, right awaythey're like well, this is me,
that's my personality, that's mypersonality.
Or they overreact, or they Idon't know they overgive, for
example, like they over overlygive and they don't replenish.
Oh, that's my personality.
I'm a giver, right.
So to me, this is what Iunderstand and it makes a lot of
(03:38):
sense, like, wait a minute.
So changing my personality tochange my personal reality is
also changing the way I react tothings, the way that I speak,
the way that I use the words andthe way that I stay within my
truth.
I believe you know what I mean.
(03:59):
Yeah, that's how I interpret it, with my own language
differences, because you knowsomeone who is an immigrant and
is exposed to several languages.
There is a subtlety inunderstanding the languages and
the vocabulary and to interpretit.
(04:21):
Does that make sense?
Speaker 2 (04:22):
It does English teacher, ma'am, it does.
And the thing is is maybe thereis a subtle difference.
I don't even care at this point.
You know what I mean Like.
The point is, we want to sharewith you this aspect that's so
important and I view it asidentity, and I'll tell you guys
what I think, because again, wemight, we might be speaking the
same language, just you knowdifferently, whatever.
(04:43):
But to me identity is who am Ibeing?
So I'll use myself as anexample.
Years ago, I identified assomeone who had IBS, right, it's
not like I would lead with that.
I wasn't proud.
In fact, that was embarrassing.
I didn't just tell people hey,I have IBS, Nice to meet you.
But it was like that was a bigpiece of my identity.
(05:05):
I identified as someone whodealt with ongoing digestive
issues, right, and that wouldplay a role in how I showed up
in the world.
Well, I don't know if I canschedule this event, because
what if digestive issues kick inand I have to run to the
restroom?
It's going to be embarrassing.
Or I mean, I can use an example.
I've been honest about this onetoo.
(05:26):
I am a recovering perfectionist, Like I could be saying.
I'm trying to set boundaries,but I have to rewrite that
identity.
I have to become a person whohas boundaries, because if I'm
showing up in the world assomeone who still doesn't have
boundaries but I'm saying, well,I'm trying to set them, it
doesn't work.
So I do think we're saying thesame thing.
(05:48):
And this is such an importanttopic because everyone listening
is on some type of healingjourney, whether it's physical,
body, emotional, whatever.
You cannot change until youchange at the identity or
personality level.
You have to.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
Absolutely, absolutely.
And and then you know and youand I have talked about it
especially that we've been doingthe work, because sometimes,
like, yes, we want to Amazonprime everything.
And we have been doing the worksince 2018, you and I, 2018,
2019.
And just recently, I told you Ifinally achieved emotional
(06:26):
intelligence.
Um, you know, among chaos, Ifinally can stand in my truth.
But how do I achieve that?
That's not overnight, right?
So, same thing I talked to mydaughter about yesterday, so I'm
going to talk about, you know,like it's the subtlety of, like,
doing the work, showing up anddoing it little by little, and
some days you're not going to beable to show up, and some days
(06:46):
you are going to to, to, youknow, maybe react differently or
like the old, the old ways orwhatever, but it will all click
the more that you do the work,little by little, every single
day.
And then you look, you're like,wait a minute, wait a minute,
(07:10):
wow.
Like I can definitely right nowbe in my truth and be and say
things differently or reactdifferently or not react,
because I have been doing thework.
It does.
It will come, like you know, itwill come back to you.
It's just that it takes timeand it takes you showing up
every single day.
You can't just say well, I havebeen meditating for a year,
I've been meditating, I've beenjournaling for a year and a half
(07:31):
and things are not happening.
But guess what?
The work is not going to waste,because it will solidify and it
will come to fruition the moreyou do it and you show up.
But I do also want to mention oh, I was telling my daughter the
same thing, because she keptsaying, you know, she beats
herself up a lot about dancing.
And we're talking about ityesterday and we kind of like
(07:54):
were able to like be a littlebit truthful and I told her.
I said you know, but you alsolike right now, just about a
year or two ago, you decided tofocus more in the dance classes,
you decided to put more effortin.
So you can't expect theimprovement to happen overnight
because guess what, allthroughout the other years, you
(08:15):
weren't as focused, you weren'tas determined, you were fooling
around.
Sometimes in classes, you weresocializing more than you were
paying attention.
And then you look around,you're like wait a minute, why
am I still right here?
It's because you know.
Now you decided to put in theeffort and guess what?
It is going to take time, butdon't give up, and that's
another thing.
A lot of people give up beforethey see the fruits.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
And they didn't adopt that personality or identity,
right?
So when I first heard that term, like I think it was around
money.
Right, like you wanna createwealth to have the identity.
No, you've got to collapse timeor act as is.
(08:59):
And I'm like so am I supposedto walk into a store and buy
something really expensive?
I didn't understand that.
It was abstract.
But even with what you'resaying about your daughter, if
she identified as a dancer, ifthat was her personality I'm
going to use the termsinterchangeably how would she
show up in the world?
If she was like I'm an amazingdancer, she would be responsible
(09:24):
, committed, integral, likeshowing up for these, practicing
all the time.
It's the same thing in everyaspect of your life, right, I'm
not just going to say healthhere.
It could be in your finances,your relationships.
(09:46):
Like, how am I showing up?
Do I say every day, oh my gosh,I feel so sick.
What am I going to do?
Do I need another supplement?
Do I need to go see anotherdoctor?
You are identifying as a sickperson Absolutely.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
And I think I found a little subtle difference.
Because same thing when youwere saying, if I'm showing up
as I'm an amazing dancer, andwhat do the amazing dancers do?
They practice, they show up,they try, etc.
Same thing with health, let'stalk about health.
If you're saying, let's say youwant to say, oh, I need to
drink a lot of water, that's notan identity shift.
(10:14):
However, when you identify I'ma healthy person, what does a
healthy person do?
Well, a healthy person drinkswater.
A healthy person eats wholefoods.
A healthy person walks orwhatever, or exercises, etc.
Or like you, for example, withthe boundaries, I am going to
show up.
Or like, for example, with me,I am going to show up as an
(10:36):
entrepreneur, as someone whoowns the company, versus because
I contract with schools, right,so sometimes they may view you
as an employee and you're not.
So I am showing up, I am abusiness owner.
So it's not just in my words,it is in the actions and how I
talk to people and how I presentmyself in meetings, et cetera.
(10:57):
So I feel there is a differencebetween the identity versus
personality, right, so theidentity is the core.
Like I am a healthy person, Iam a person who has boundaries.
I am abundant, an abundantperson.
I'm not talking abundance likehaving millions in the bank.
No, you can be abundant.
I mean you have food in thefridge, you have a car, you have
(11:18):
a cell phone, et cetera.
You are abundant.
You look outside and you seeflowers.
You are abundant.
So if you're showing up as anabundant person, how does an
abundant person think, how doesan abundant person talk?
Right?
And then you have thatpersonality where we're used to
like you know the impulse or theemotions or how we react to
things.
So that will be part of thepersonality.
(11:40):
You know.
That can be shifted when youidentify with that new identity
shift.
Yeah, you know what I mean.
Instead of I'm a sick person, Ihave IBS, I'm a healthy person.
Because I'm a sick person, Ihave IBS.
What do you?
How do you show up?
You're going to make excuses.
(12:01):
You're not going to go to yourfriend's event because, guess
what, you may flare up, right.
But when you say I'm a healthyperson, you're going to show up
differently in the world.
Hence this will affect thepersonality and how you also
react to things and how youpresent things and how you talk
to others and to yourself, andyeah, that well well, and that's
the thing we already knowthoughts, emotions, all that
creates our reality.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
So if we're identifying as this sick person,
as this broke person, aswhatever it might be, whatever
these stories are, you're goingto keep attracting that back
because your thoughts and youremotions and all that create
reality.
And the thing is is I want togo back to the act, as if
because I heard that a lot yearsago it's not an overnight thing
(12:42):
, like I'll use your daughter asan example again with dancing.
She's not just going to for oneweek.
Be like I'm so committed, I'mgoing to show up and I'm going
to be an amazing dancer nextweek.
It is an ongoing process withlittle baby steps, just like if
you've been chronically sick, Idon't expect you to overnight be
like I'm so healthy.
(13:03):
You're not going to believe that.
Why on earth would you believethat if you felt like crap for
decades?
But it's little tiny things of.
I am committed, I amresponsible, I'm going to show
up and I'm going to tell myselfI am working on being a healthy
person.
So those words matter and Iknow we've done episodes on this
.
But then it's the little shiftsthat go with that that change
(13:24):
the identity of.
Okay, if I am that healthyperson, how do I show up in the
world?
How do I act?
How do I treat others?
You can start to make thosesubtle shifts without being like
, oh yeah, I feel reallyfreaking amazing right now.
Speaker 1 (13:39):
Right, or and I love how you're touching based on
that, because act as if it cancan get interpreted and
perceived differently and samewith same with me.
I didn't understand it, but Ijust love the way that you
explained it.
You know, acting as if it's notlike, oh so I'm, I'm acting as
if I'm rich, I'm going to go toCartier and then buy something
and put it on the credit card.
(14:00):
That's not acting as if right,because it can be misinterpreted
, but I really love the way thatyou explained it and it does
exactly.
And nothing happens overnight.
Nothing happens overnight,exactly.
You can't just expect yourselfto be healthy or eat healthy for
a week and guess what?
Speaker 2 (14:38):
no-transcript, all of those things leading up to that
.
If you had a crap ton ofstories from generations, good
luck.
You know, one session ofmeditation is probably not going
to not going to do much.
Speaker 1 (14:56):
Exactly.
No, no, no, no, you did it,it's fine.
No, I love how we're doing thatbecause it's just it's how we
build, and I really love how wedo things because we do come
from different backgrounds,different experiences, and we
bring all that in to the podcastand to how we interpret things,
because, guess what, what we'resaying has been said, it's not
like we're saying has been said.
It's not like we're saying likethings that are new.
However, we're saying how weare applying it to our own
(15:20):
experiences, and it does taketime.
I'm telling you like I swearI've been.
How many times have I told youI want to achieve peace among
chaos?
I really want to, and and I'vebeen working since my on my
mindset, on myself, since 2018,and it was never linear, like,
oh, I'm going up, up, up, it wasall over the place, but finally
(15:40):
I reached a place where, wow,there's chaos happening around
me and I'm not losing myemotions and my control.
I mean, like, sometimes I mayand you're human right.
Speaker 2 (15:53):
We're not gonna, we're never gonna be perfect
however.
Speaker 1 (15:56):
However, I'm bringing back myself to balance right
away.
Like it's, it's.
It's so phenomenal to be like Idon't know how to explain it,
but it just everything isclicking.
But they didn't start.
So I cannot come and say, oh,you know, it's just clicking,
everything is great, I, I like,I'm, I'm peaceful among chaos,
whatever.
(16:16):
But I need to tell, I need totell you know, our listeners,
that it's been years of showingup, of doing the work, of, of
you know and and hating the workand yelling at the work and be
like what the heck is going on.
Why can't it?
What can it happen?
And then you listen to otherpodcasts and other people.
Oh, life is roses and daisies,which is great.
Yes, life is roses and daisies,which is great.
(16:37):
Yes, life is roses and daisies.
But you are putting in the work, you're putting in the effort,
little by little, these smallshifts, small shifts, small
shifts.
And that's why we're talkingabout the not giving up, because
a lot of people will be like,fuck it, I've been eating
healthy.
How many of your clients may dothat?
Right, oh, I've worked withKira, or I've worked with
(16:59):
several practitioners and I'vedone everything but they were
not healthy at an identity level.
I'm just throwing that outexactly, but that's another
thing.
You, sometimes, a lot of us,you and I have done it before.
We have given up, maybe beforefruition comes in, but then we
were like you know, we talkedamongst each other and you know,
whatever.
But it's really, reallyimportant to just stay on your
(17:22):
path and I believe determinationand not giving up on yourself
is something that this is true,self unconditional love, loving
yourself even, even even whenyou are betraying yourself.
And that's what I tell myself.
Even when I find myselfbetraying myself, I just always
say I love you, I love you somuch.
(17:43):
I know that I did this.
Please forgive me.
I'm going to do better in thenext moment, because life is
moment by moment and that's howyou make the shift.
It's not?
Oh, you know, I'll start onMonday.
I'll start on Tuesday.
I'll start on Monday.
I'll start on Tuesday.
I'll start on, you know, newYear's Day or whatever, which is
great, but those don't get youany.
(18:03):
I mean, yeah, yeah, I mean theydo like for a little bit, but
you got to put in the effortevery single day, every single
day.
And even when you achieve it,guess what?
You're going to want more.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
Yeah, and then you dig deeper and that's how we got
into shadow work and theidentity thing is a daily thing.
I had a sticky note on mylaptop for the last 12 months no
joke, it's finally gone.
But it said am I being and thatwas me reminding myself at an
identity level for everythingI'm doing?
Who do I want to be in thisworld and do I have the identity
(18:37):
that matches what I'm after?
And many times it was no.
Speaker 1 (18:41):
Absolutely, and I know you and I leave messages to
each other all the freakingtime Sometimes, I know with you,
boundaries is a big thing foryou, and you had a situation
just recently, not too long ago,and we talked through it and
again you examined what am Ibeing, et cetera.
So it's really, reallyimportant to constantly analyze
(19:03):
it, to constantly, you know, um,also to constantly like, really
look within and takeaccountability, because, at the
end of the day, it is all you.
Speaker 2 (19:13):
It is all you, it's all you it is, and that's what I
was going to say is whateveryour goal is and don't have
5,000 goals right.
It's not to be rich, it's notto have amazing relationships,
it's not to be healthy, like,pick one, pick one thing right
now that would make your lifebetter.
And that's where you start withidentifying how's my
personality around that and ismy identity matching the person
(19:35):
that needs to be to get thatresult, if that makes sense?
Speaker 1 (19:39):
And forgive yourself when you, when you react, um,
like the old personality, itdoesn't matter, it's fine.
Forgive yourself, cause what wedo, sometimes we dwell over it
Like, oh my goodness, like, forexample, my daughter let's go
back to my daughter oh mygoodness, mommy, I've been, I
put in so much effort, I triedand I'm like, but you just like,
literally started practicinglike two days ago.
(20:00):
You know what I mean.
So it's you know, like it isimportant to also remind
yourself and be gracefulthroughout.
Right, it's like, okay, fine, Ifucked up.
This time, you know, I forgivemyself.
However, I'm going to try andalways do it moment by moment,
because our life is present,moment.
It is now, and I know we'vetalked about it, we have, um, an
(20:22):
episode about that, but it'sreally, it's the.
It's literally the momentsyou're driving in the car and
let's say, you want peace, right, and then you're driving and
then someone, someone doessomething and you, freaking,
have the road rage, right, soreact it as your old personality
.
I know you and I do that allthe time.
But if this is, you know,something like, for example, I'm
working on peace, I'm like,okay, fine, you cut me.
(20:43):
Okay, okay, god bless you, rightInstead of like, instead of you
know the middle finger, I know,instead of oh, I dropped the
microphone instead of going intothe road rage like this is a
simple example, right?
Or for example, let's say youare identifying, you're changing
identity about I am healthy,which is basically showing up
(21:05):
and drinking water, exercising,eating whole foods.
And let's say you know, guesswhat?
You go to the movies and youeat nachos.
Right, it's not the end of theworld.
Speaker 2 (21:13):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
It's okay Like go forgive yourself the world.
Yes, it's okay like go forgiveyourself.
But a lot, of, a lot of us,what we do is we beat ourselves
down so much that we um, what isit which?
Like, um, I don't know what I'mtrying to say, but we beat
ourselves so much that we um,counter what we are actually
working on.
You know what I mean.
Like it's fine, I get it.
(21:35):
You ate the nachos, okay, fine,sometimes healthy people eat
nachos.
It's gonna be okay yeah, and Ifeel that sometimes and correct
me if I'm wrong, kira becauseeverybody on the Instagram on
the Instagram.
Speaker 2 (21:45):
I just say Instagram.
I love it.
Speaker 1 (21:47):
We have a new term over here on the internet, on
social media, they're portrayingthese beautiful like oh, the
jets and the health and therelationships and the this.
I know you're rolling your eyesbut I feel like I mean.
But again, I'm not saying theydon't have, but I'm saying guess
(22:09):
how much work they've done toget there.
So don't compare your day oneto their 100 or 200.
Like you know, like everybodytalks about Mr Beast and like
dude, he even going oninterviews saying he freaking,
was posting every single day andno one was watching.
But guess what?
He did not give up.
He did not give up and he keptgoing.
And he kept going even when noone's watching.
(22:30):
Even with us look at us.
Even if no one's listening,guess what?
You and I are still showing upand are still recording.
You know what I mean.
Let's say, whether even we haveone listener or one download,
we celebrate that because thisone download could lead to more
and more and more.
And we're still showing up.
We didn't say, oh, you knowwhat, I give up, we only had
(22:52):
this amount in a year.
We are doing something wrong.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
Kira, we need to stop .
Speaker 1 (22:57):
We didn't, so that's really important.
To just continue, stay on yourfreaking path, and it's your
path.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
Well, and you guys know Denise is usually the one
with the short, actionable tips.
But I've got a few things forshifting this, because it does
sound obscure to change yourpersonality or your identity,
and I know that there's a subtledifference.
That's fine, but I think you'vegot to recognize how to do that
.
So my first thing is again,figure out what that identity is
(23:28):
right.
If you're working towardsoptimal health, how would I show
up in the world if I am ahealthy person?
So first thing is awareness.
Like catch what you're tellingyourself oh my gosh, I'm always
sick.
Oh, I always feel like crap, Ihate my body, whatever it is
like.
Catch that and then askyourself questions and I know
(23:49):
we've touched on this before butis that true?
Is that true?
You're always going to be sickfor the rest of your life?
Does that serve you?
And then start to shift.
Who can that future self beright?
For some of you you might belike I'm already eating healthy
and drinking the water, denise,I'm doing all the things, but
your mind might not be therebecause you're always going back
(24:12):
to the I'm sick, I feel likeshit, I hate my body, whatever
it is.
So you have to look at if I washealthy Even in joking.
Speaker 1 (24:21):
I want to mention yes , even joking.
Speaker 2 (24:23):
Yeah.
So how would I show up in theworld?
How would I talk to myself?
How would I talk to others?
What would I do with my day?
So it doesn't just have to beoh, it's the healthy eating.
No, think through what thatwould be.
Who would you need to be andshow up as, and keep doing that?
And then sometimes there needsto be some integration.
(24:43):
Sometimes you really need towork on the nervous system.
If you've been on overdrive,because that is the state of
your body and you got to shiftit out.
Sometimes you got to journal.
Sometimes you got to shift itout.
Sometimes you got to journal.
Sometimes you got to walk, likeDenise and I always talk about.
Sometimes you need anaccountability buddy, like
something.
But you got to work throughthese steps to start to shift at
that identity and personalitylevel.
Speaker 1 (25:05):
My tip is I love yours and definitely this is the
first step.
And because we always talk andnot just us, you know our
subconscious level.
It is a negative bias.
Right, I'm not the only one whosaid that and our subconscious
is 95 of our.
You know reality, so I thequick, actionable steps.
(25:27):
You're going to sleep anyway,right?
So choose, uh, whether it'ssubliminal messages or night
meditations that are working onthose values, and just listen to
that yeah like.
I mean, you're gonna sleepanyway, you're gonna fall asleep
anyway, whether you want to putthe headphones in your ears or
I know kira doesn't like that oryou want to, um, just put it on
(25:49):
alexa or put it in your room.
But I understand, because ifyou're sleeping with a partner
or with the kids or something wedon't know what your situation
is you can definitely have gethealthy headphones.
Like kira said, I I use airpods, so I'm not going to pretend
that I don't and I know she'sshaking her head, but, um, but I
really think this, definitelybecause it's behind the scenes
(26:11):
that you're not even thinkingabout, because you're already
sleeping, it's, and a lot ofthem are free on YouTube, so you
do not need a fancy app andthen just look up.
You know, um, whatever,whatever you are working toward,
whether it is, you know, morepeace, abundance, uh, whatever,
whatever, whatever, and I amgoing to also touch base on so
this is, this is a veryactionable step that you can do
(26:31):
while you're sleeping, that youdon't even have to think about
it and then it starts.
But, but don't think it'shappening overnight.
It is going to take time and um, yeah, and you said the
awareness, this one, and Iwanted to say another one that I
totally forgot.
Speaker 2 (26:46):
That's okay.
One thing I will one of my lastthings I'll say is you
mentioned self-love and I dothink that's important.
So I want to remind you guys,if you're really struggling to
shift at the identity level orthe personality there is a
disconnect there with theself-love go back and listen to
episode two, which is all aboutself-love, and Denise was
(27:06):
talking about subliminal.
I don't have subliminal.
However, I do have a freeself-love hypnosis download so
you could totally download thatand listen to it twice a day for
several weeks as a way to startto reprogram and that will make
things easier to shift at theidentity level.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
Yeah and um and then, but don't, but please don't
work on everything at once.
Nope, I remember.
I remember what I wanted to say.
It's also the emotions, right?
So the emotions are, you know,triggering.
So I also, I know we recorded alot on emotions.
So another actionable step iswhatever you want to feel like,
let's say, peace, abundance, etcetera, et cetera Start
(27:44):
practicing these emotions, evenif it is once a day, closing
your eyes, putting your hand onyour heart and taking a few deep
breaths, because also, this isfree, it doesn't require any
apps.
And then just what?
If you're working on you know,having joy or peace, no matter
what, or whatever the emotionsyou want to achieve.
You know, just close your eyesfor a little bit, have a few
(28:05):
deep breaths and say what doesfeeling joy feel like, what does
feeling peace feel like?
And just imagine it through thebreaths.
So what you're doing, also, youare interrupting, um, and you
are teaching your body as wellwhat it feels like to be joyful,
what it feels like to bepeaceful, etc.
Etc.
(28:25):
And I cannot stress enough I,you know, I've been working on
that piece for a long ass time,girl, a long ass time.
And eventually, once things getrolling.
I will talk about it veryopenly.
However, I cannot stress enough.
I've been working on it for somany years and now there is
plenty of chaos, plenty of chaosaround me, plenty, and you know
(28:48):
that and you know that.
And but deep down, I am sopeaceful and I'm so in tune to
the um, to the divine, to God,that every time I stop messing
with my brain, the analyticalwhat, every time the analytical
brain and analytical mind kicksin to convince me otherwise,
(29:12):
something happens in my reality,to show me that guess what?
You're on the right path, honey, literally, literally.
And I've wished for that, Iwish for that, I would.
I would hear people say that,oh, you know, God is speaking to
me or I can feel it.
I feel it.
I feel it every single time.
(29:33):
The analytical mind comes in toconvince me Otherwise, which
right now I call it the devil,because you know, in each one of
us there's a God and there's adevil.
God kicks in right away in themysterious ways, but why?
I'm aware and my eyes are open.
Speaker 2 (29:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
Oh, I love that.
But that took years and yearsof showing up and not giving up.
But it was not linear, it wasup and down, which?
Is how healing is right and butI definitely want to like share
this because you and I likesometimes you and I would say
we've been doing the rightthings.
We've been doing everythinglike why this is that happening?
Speaker 2 (30:11):
give it time it will happen.
Speaker 1 (30:13):
It will happen.
So it kind of gives me like youknow, please, like whenever
you're looking at social orlistening to people on podcasts,
that they tell you so manythings, just like us, just know
that behind the scenes we did alot of work, a lot of painful
work, yep, so so my guys yeah,oh, my goodness, I mean, yeah, I
(30:36):
love talking about this.
I wouldn't even look at thescript, I don't even know what
we're going to say, something.
Speaker 2 (30:41):
We never have a script, guys.
We might have some bulletpoints on a yeah, but I mean,
you guys know the drill.
We we are found through reviewsand I didn't realize that.
So I just want to reiteratethat we would love if this
resonates with you.
We would love a five-starreview.
We would love your words onthere with it, and then find us
(31:04):
on Instagram.
I know we're not great aboutour Instagram page, but leave us
a message.
That's identity.
Look at that, I caught it withidentity I wasn't, I wasn't
gonna lie, but I'm owning it.
We're owning it, we're takingaccountability, but we're on
there and we're active and weread messages.
So if there's any topic youwant us to discuss or bring an
(31:25):
expert in, please let us know,and then I know we keep, you
know, subtly dropping some hintsabout something coming.
It is, it's coming, it's coming.
Speaker 1 (31:35):
It's just life.
I mean, you're homeschoolingyour kid.
Oh, this is something new to me.
I'm going through something youknow, really also new to me.
So it will take time, but weare working on it, we're talking
about it and we are going toput it out in the world.
But please, meanwhile,especially with today, download
(31:56):
um kira self-love hypnosis.
It is free um, get it done.
We also are working on um likea landing page for our podcast,
so we can start um, you know,notifying you of good things.
But yes, please, please, please, if you resonate with this,
send it to a friend, leave us areview with your words, because
it will, you know, kind of.
You know, because a lot of likeyou and I are so real, I feel
that more people um can connectwith us because we're not coming
(32:16):
from the like you know, somighty.
Okay, guys.
Speaker 2 (32:22):
See you on the next episode.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang
Ding dong! Join your culture consultants, Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang, on an unforgettable journey into the beating heart of CULTURE. Alongside sizzling special guests, they GET INTO the hottest pop-culture moments of the day and the formative cultural experiences that turned them into Culturistas. Produced by the Big Money Players Network and iHeartRadio.
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.