October 16, 2025 • 24 mins
What if the reason you feel stuck isn’t a lack of information, but too much of it? We unpack the quiet habit of outsourcing healing, from practitioner hopping and supplement overload to spiritual tools that drown out intuition. With candid stories and practical reframes, we explore how to move from “tell me what to do” to “help me hear myself,” so your choices come from clarity instead of chaos.
We draw a clear line between supportive guidance and giving away power. On the physical side, we talk about why symptoms often return after a great protocol, and how unexamined beliefs, stress patterns, and triggers keep the loop alive. On the emotional and spiritual side, we get real about “busy healing” as a trauma response (courses, workshops, and readings that create more noise than relief), and share simple ways to pause the inputs so your nervous system can settle and your intuition can speak. We also rethink diagnosis as information rather than identity, and share examples of recovery that highlight the role of belief, presence, and patient practice.
If this resonates, follow the show, share it with someone who needs it, and leave a quick review—what’s one thing you’ll stop outsourcing this week?
Follow us on Instagram, leave a review, and share your experiences – we'd love to hear what resonates with you!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_01 (00:03):
Welcome to the Heal Yourself podcast, where we dive
deep into all things healing.
I'm Denise, a speech languagepathologist and a self-love
coach for adults and teens.
SPEAKER_00 (00:15):
And I'm Kira, a traditional naturopath and
functional nutritionist, andwe're here to guide you through
the transformative process ofhealing your body, mind, and
soul.
SPEAKER_01 (00:25):
From the latest in functional medicine to nurturing
your relationship with yourself,healing trauma, and even
transforming your money story.
We're here to empower you withthe knowledge and tools to
create lasting change.
SPEAKER_00 (00:39):
So whether you're looking to heal physically,
emotionally, or spiritually,join us as we explore the many
paths to wholeness and wellness.
Hey everyone, welcome back toanother episode of Heal Yourself
Podcast.
Today you got Denise and Italking about outsourcing our
(01:00):
healing.
How do we come up with thesetopics?
Like I don't know.
They just honestly, part of itcame up based on good old social
media and some posts I made.
Um I was like, man, there's alot of people that outsource
their healing.
And we're talking about itthrough both aspects, right?
We're never just making anepisode about physical health,
(01:23):
but it's like outsourcing yourhealing physically and also
spiritually, emotionally,whatever, right?
So when I when I say outsourcinghealing, what comes to you?
SPEAKER_01 (01:35):
Looking outside for my healing, everything.
And we're not just talking, likeyou said, we're not just talking
physical healing, like likealways seeking answer outside,
outside, outside.
Everything is outside of me, youknow, everything is outside.
And then, of course, you and Iare gonna be very transparent
and we are gonna talk about whatwe do as well, right?
Because we also get into it.
And I just have to put it on theside note.
(01:57):
Kira loves to ruffle feathers onFacebook, she loves it, she
loves it.
So if you're not following her,follow her.
Because I love it though.
I love it because it goes withwith our, you know, the the
other episode, you know, what ifI'm or I wonder if I'm wrong,
but whatever.
Kira is like, you are amazingwith that.
Like, you know, whatever.
(02:17):
I may be wrong, or what if I'mwrong?
And I'm willing to put it outthere.
So that's like the ultimate, andI love that because you know, at
the end of the day, like we arelike I I like imagine us, like
we are the palettes, like thepaintings, right?
We can't all be blue becausethat's boring.
We can't all be yellow becausethat's really boring.
(02:38):
Can you imagine like everyone'swalking around yellow?
No, so I think it's just likewhat makes us really wonderful
and you know, unique is the whatwe bring, like all the colors we
bring to the table.
So it's really important that wedon't have to agree with
everything we you put out there.
It's okay.
SPEAKER_00 (02:59):
Yeah, that's so true, and that's the thing.
I I'm I can't even remember whatthe post was, but it definitely
ruffled feathers.
And the thing is, is part ofit's the algorithm, right?
Like the more controversy, themore comments I get.
I know, but they love it, butlike, oh drama.
I mean, my honestly though, mymain purpose is to get people to
(03:19):
think and to question thingsbecause that's the only way we
grow.
And that's the thing, it gets methinking and questioning things.
Um, you know, like I was gettingtriggered by someone else who
had responded to that.
And the funny thing was, is thenI was asking myself, well, what
is this showing me?
So, you know, yeah.
So, okay, outsourcing healing.
SPEAKER_01 (03:41):
Yes, well, it's it's all kind of you know us.
Everything is part of healing,though, Kira.
Like everything we're saying ispart of healing.
And then you and I, what I loveabout us is like we are so
relatable to the personlistening, to the person next
door, because we are so like wejust apply it, like we tell you,
like, hey, we're going throughshit, or we, you know, we we got
triggered through this orthrough that.
(04:03):
Like, we're not all herealmighty, and we outsourced our
healing as well.
So, yeah, let's rewind, go backto the topic.
SPEAKER_00 (04:09):
Well, and I I think it pertains to the topic, but I
agree, like that's how I view itis like I'm looking outside
myself for answers, and that canbe in a multitude of ways.
Again, like physical health.
Oh my gosh, I need anotherpractitioner, I need this, and
there is a difference, right?
Like, there is a difference forme for someone coming to me and
saying, Hey, can you help mesort through all the noise out
(04:33):
there?
There's a billion supplements, amillion different diets, like
different labs, all thesethings.
I want someone to help menavigate my issues versus
someone who's like, I need youto tell me exactly what to do.
And oh, that didn't work.
Next practitioner, I need you totell me exactly what to do.
That is outsourcing yourhealing.
There's a difference betweenreally putting the healing on
(04:57):
someone else versus like, I needsome education, I need some
guidance, I need some coaching.
And there's a fine line there.
And you said the same thing,like we can walk it from a
spiritual path, not from aphysical one.
Like, I don't have any physicalissues right now.
SPEAKER_01 (05:12):
I mean, it's interesting you mentioned that
because, you know, I uh Istarted seeing a new therapist,
and just this past Tuesday we'retalking about it, and he was
saying that yeah, I don't giveadvice or tips to my kids or to
my clients.
You know, we work through it, wetalk about like we present ideas
with, you know, we role play.
(05:32):
You are coming up with yourideas.
Like, here are the pros, hereare the cons.
Because he said it.
I mean, he was very honest andsaid, if I give my kids or my my
clients tips and advice and itdoesn't work for them because we
all have different experiences,it's on me.
Why?
We can coach, he can he canguide me through, direct me,
right?
Like maybe kind of like help menavigate, like instead of, you
(05:55):
know, just kind of like imaginewhen you aren't on maps, right?
You're instead of choosing thelonger route, you're choosing
the shorter route.
He's guiding me through that.
However, I'm still coming upwith my own solutions.
I'm coming out when we're doingthe role play.
I'm the one coming out with theideas and with the questions and
with the answers because we hearit all the time.
The answers are right in frontof us.
(06:17):
No, sorry, the answers arewithin us.
Everything we want is within us.
Yes, sometimes we are a littlebit maybe because of our
conditioning, we may not hearit, we may need the coaching,
but we can't just rely too muchon it.
Because I mean, think about itthis way.
This it just came to me rightnow, this is the form of
addiction.
It is right, and then we have togo back to you and I, right?
(06:38):
When we were jumping from oneperson talking about
manifestation to another, toanother, to another, to another,
to this book, to that book.
To one point, we were listeningto like probably three, four
podcasts at the same time.
I don't know how manyaudiobooks, and you know,
reading from and attending somany.
Oh, this free workshop, thisfree workshop, and the noise
becomes too much.
(06:58):
That is no bueno either, becausethat's also we are addicted to
I'm seeking answers outside ofme instead of you, you know,
getting educated from thesepeople and then actually really
applying it to myself.
I think what we're doingsometimes with outsourcing is
like, oh, wait a minute, I'mlistening to this person, he
said this, okay.
That let me jump to that personbecause I don't want to do the
(07:19):
work that this person said.
Let me jump to that person.
Oh, wait, wait, she, I like thisone, but I don't want, let me
jump to that, to that, to that.
And we're still avoiding lookingwithin and doing the work.
SPEAKER_00 (07:31):
Or people will do it, but they won't like they're
not digging deep enough, orthey're it's becoming a
checklist, right?
Of like, oh, I did this becausethey said that.
Oh, and okay, I'm not healedyet.
Let me do this because thisperson said I need to do that,
check it off my list.
And I like what you said, butI'm also gonna throw in that
(07:51):
busy healing.
I'm gonna call it busy healing,right?
Like, let me do this, let mewatch this webinar, let me take
this course, let me hire thisperson.
Oh, there's another webinar.
This busy healing is a traumaresponse.
And I will own that too, becauseit's absolutely let me create
more chaos in my life, let meoutsource my healing.
(08:14):
I've got to do this, I've got tobounce from person to person, or
you know what I mean?
SPEAKER_01 (08:18):
Like all these different from supplement to
supplement, supplement companyto supplement company, over
researching, tracking everybite.
SPEAKER_00 (08:26):
Yep, that's uh, yes, yes, yes, yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (08:33):
And then sometimes it just becomes too much where
we really need to just kind oflike maybe stop.
And that could be sometimes youand I do this where we are we're
taking a break, like thisweekend, I'm not doing anything,
or this week I'm not doinganything, I'm not listening to
anything, I'm putting pause onall this stuff, all of the
emails, I'm just subscribingfrom this, this, and this,
(08:54):
because it just becomes like Idon't know why diarrhea came to
my mind.
A mental diarrhea.
SPEAKER_00 (09:05):
I'm laughing.
SPEAKER_01 (09:07):
Mental diarrhea, and it's like, you know, it's just
it's just too much where yougotta you gotta really calm it
down and then truly look within.
And looking within can be likejust stopping to listening to
stop listening to all of this,you know.
Pause the podcast that you'relistening to for a week, you
know, unsubscribe from a fewemails, or maybe if you don't
want to unsubscribe from them,don't look at them, or uh, you
(09:30):
know, take a break from thesupplements.
Because some people, I mean, andI know you see it, girlfriend.
Some people are probably on likewhat over than 20 over 20
supplements.
SPEAKER_00 (09:39):
Yeah, I've I've seen it many, many, many times.
And that's all outsourcing.
It's too much for the bot, theliver.
SPEAKER_01 (09:46):
You're not allowing the body to yes, you're not
allowing the body to processthem.
And I remember when we were inschool, like the uh it there was
like something we we learnedabout taking a break from those
supplements, giving them, givingyour your body a break because
your body is getting sooverwhelmed.
And but it all comes down tolike you said, we are craving
the chaos and we continueseeking out and out and out
(10:10):
where when we calm down, theanswers will like we're not even
giving our intuition a chance tospeak to us.
SPEAKER_00 (10:18):
Yeah.
It's like, let me rely onsomeone else to tell me what's
wrong, what's broken, what Ineed to fix.
And it's like, but what ifyou're not broken?
What if you don't need to befixed?
Exactly.
Yeah, what if you have theanswers?
What if you again startquestioning some of those things
of like the diagnosis, or oh mygosh, this all came from my
childhood trauma, or thisstemmed from this, or I believe
(10:42):
I have that, like there's I haveso many examples, and I don't
want to get into them in thehealth space, but it's just so
easy to be like, well, thisperson told me this is my
diagnosis, this is what I needto do, and now I have to live
this forever.
SPEAKER_01 (10:56):
It's like, well, why that's not a death sentence,
exactly.
Like, I think a lot of peoplejust view the any diagnosis as a
death sentence where we haveseen it, and there's proof.
I mean, right now there's AI.
You can definitely look it up.
How many people have actuallyhealed themselves from really
(11:18):
chronic conditions, diseases,whether it is uh, you know,
health-wise or even I mean, I'mlistening to Dr.
Judas Penza's book BecomingSupernatural.
I mean, some of the testimonialsand the stories, I'm like, these
people have like actualconditions where they needed
surgery.
SPEAKER_00 (11:34):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (11:34):
And then they didn't.
SPEAKER_00 (11:36):
Well, so I told you about the documentary heal.
So for for anyone listening, ifyou've not seen the documentary
Heal, highly, highly, highlyrecommend it.
I've seen it two or three timesnow.
Um, probably due for anotherwatch.
It's been a few years, but thiswas the first one that really
opened my eyes to like, oh mygosh, healing is not just what I
thought it was.
(11:57):
It's not just change your dietand take the right supplements
and do the detoxes and you know,all these things that I
initially thought it was.
There was an instance wherethere was a chiropractor, he
broke his spine, but because hewas a chiropractor, he knew,
right, all of the I'll saybones.
(12:17):
I know this is not my specialty,guys.
SPEAKER_01 (12:21):
Vertebrae.
SPEAKER_00 (12:22):
Thank you.
No, that's exactly the word Iwas looking for.
He knew where everything was.
SPEAKER_01 (12:25):
Oh wow, look at that.
Look at me.
SPEAKER_00 (12:28):
Um, so he was paying attention in anatomy class.
You are thank you, thank you.
That's exactly what I wanted tosay.
But he could he would visualizeevery single vertebrae falling
back into place.
And I think it was a year, Idon't know, go watch the
documentary, but I think it wasa year later that he was healed
and they told him he wouldn'twalk again.
(12:49):
Again, it is the power Iremember you telling about it.
SPEAKER_01 (12:51):
Or I or I remember watching it, I think I remember
watching it, but yeah, no, andand it's and I believe it, I
believe it.
SPEAKER_00 (12:58):
And that's just one example, like that's one
physical example.
But the thing is, is if you'reoutsourcing your healing and
saying, I need you to fix me,what would have happened to him?
Like, we need to turn inward,and that's where it goes back to
what you and I have said in thepast.
Stop trying to Amazon primeeverything, your inner healing,
(13:18):
your exterior healing.
Oh, I need to heal this trauma,I need to do this.
You have to go through it.
These are lessons, and you and Ihave been talking about this a
lot.
Everything in your life is hereto teach you something.
Absolutely.
Pushing it away and saying,okay, I just need this to be
gone.
I don't like this situation inmy life, I don't like this
physical symptom.
(13:39):
Somebody take it away from me.
It's just gonna come back untilyou learn an example.
SPEAKER_01 (13:43):
It's gonna come back a different way, or it's gonna
remain, or it's gonna becomepersistent.
Absolutely, absolutely.
And I know that I love how youand I are getting deeper into
different practices that we areincluding them in the course.
Oh my goodness, yay! Like thisis becoming really like we
cannot wait to actually revealit and talk about it even in
(14:03):
more details on differentepisodes.
But I love how we are trulyright now, like, no matter how
hard the kid, because I eventold you in the voice message
today, like, you know, I wasgoing through something
yesterday, and I was like, okay,so I can either start crying
about it and be like, oh my god,pity me, and then I told myself,
(14:23):
like, you know what, Denise, Ilooked at myself in the mirror,
I was like, Do you really wantto continue repeating this like
pattern after pattern, timeafter time, life after platform?
I was like, mm-mm.
So, and yeah, you know, and Ijust changed, I moved from
reactive to proactive, and andagain, I thought I'm including
that in the course.
But anyway, so um, you know whatI mean?
Like, it's just like it, it'sit's something that I was like,
(14:45):
no, like I need to do somethingabout it.
So it's really, really importantto also not like you mentioned
that the chiropractor thathealed his spine, it took him a
year or whatever.
The thing is exactly stopwanting to Amazon prime your
life, your healing or whatever,because it it can't take a day
or two days or a month, becausewe have heard some healing
(15:07):
happening miraculously and justnot a long time, but also there
are people who waited a year,two, or three.
Yeah, so embracing every momentand every step of the way and
remembering, go back to thepresent episode, being in the
present moment, where this isall we have.
Healing happens in the presentmoment, and everything is here
(15:27):
to teach us something.
So instead of hating on it, sowe can continue repeating it,
just embrace it.
I'm not saying go celebrate it,but embrace it that it's here
for you to teach you something,and instead of saying, Why is
this happening to me?
The heck, this is happening tome, what can I learn from this?
What is the opportunity that Ineed to take from this?
(15:48):
And yeah, yeah, and then justlean on yourself.
And I do have a tip I want toadd that when it becomes too
chaotic, shut down everythingfor at least a week, shut down
everything for at least a week,and then do some deep breathing
at least once or twice a day.
And you know, like, and I'm surewe've talked about deep
breathing before in differentepisodes, but it's not really
(16:08):
that hard.
Like, you can take a deepbreath, hold, exhale.
SPEAKER_00 (16:12):
That's well, and I also wanted to throw in there,
don't forget, and I know we'vesaid this before, your exterior
world is just mirroring theinternal world.
So if you're constantly lookingoutside of yourself for healing,
again, whatever we're talking,physical, emotional, spiritual,
(16:34):
it's because you haven't trustedwhat's within.
SPEAKER_01 (16:38):
So yeah, and then including relationship healing,
healing relationships, right?
Because people in our lives are,you know, they're truly here as
mirrors and to show us theunconscious side of us.
So, you know, and I know, like Isaid, we're talking about that
in the course about triggers,and we are gonna dive deep in
the triggers because you reallywant to make sure that you are
(17:00):
addressing those triggersbecause you know, you can want
to heal your your body and thediagnosis that you were that
were thrown at you, but all ofthose are gonna persist and
remain if you are not trulyaddressing those triggers and
changing them once once and forall, so they don't keep
(17:20):
repeating and coming back andthe patterns and stuff like
that, right?
So, I mean, if I look at my lifeand I'm like, whoa, like I mean,
I see this pattern repeatingover and over again, and it's on
me to change that, it's on me todo something about it.
Because it's like, you know, andit reminds me also about like
religion, where I know you and Iare very spiritual, but religion
(17:44):
relies too much on the outside,right?
Let me like praying to, yes, youare you can you can pray to
somebody to guide you, however,that they're not coming to hold
your hand, and yeah, you knowwhat I mean.
Like I'm talking about likeChristianity, where they they
like people believe that likeJesus is gonna come, which I
(18:05):
mean, I don't know, to whatever.
I'm not gonna discuss this, butlike, okay, he's coming to do
what to hold you by the hand andsolve all of your problems.
Yeah, he already showed youthrough the teachings.
Do exactly like he said, andyou'll heal, buddy or missy.
Right.
And like it kind of like, kindof like, I'm like, so what are
(18:26):
you waiting on?
You're gonna wait forever.
SPEAKER_00 (18:29):
I know, right?
But it's again, it's so mucheasier for someone to outsource
it and say, You tell me what todo.
I don't want to look within, Idon't want to feel this pain,
whatever this pain is.
Um, I don't want to do the innerwork, I don't want to look at my
triggers, I don't want to lookat my patterns, I don't want to
look at what lessons I'm beingtaught.
SPEAKER_01 (18:49):
Okay, well, you're just then don't complain and
accept the life.
SPEAKER_00 (18:52):
Well, and it's just gonna keep repeating then.
SPEAKER_01 (18:54):
So it is, it is gonna keep repeating.
It is absolutely, and if itdoesn't repeat the other day, I
was listening to the podcast,you know, the David Gamp
podcast, and he said, So let'ssay, you know, you are in an
abusive relationship, right?
And then you divorce that personand you're like, okay, no more,
I'm not gonna get marriedanymore.
That's it, we're done.
And then it's gonna the same thepatterns are gonna repeat in uh
(19:16):
friendships.
Even if you're gonna be like,Well, I don't want friends
anymore, like, no more, I'm donewith friends.
It's gonna repeat in your, it'sgonna come up in your children.
You know, I don't want to havechildren anymore, it's gonna
come up your neighbors, yourparents, whatever.
Like, it is gonna stay thereuntil you actually go down to
the roots and then just youknow, start pulling pulling it
(19:36):
from from underneath, yeah, anddiscovering the beauty that we
are, and you know, like we saythat to our and remember you
guys, like this is this podcastis also for us because we remind
ourselves every single day, andwe give ourselves pep talk.
We're like, just like yesterday,I looked at myself in the
mirror.
I'm like, you either cancontinue repeating that or you
(19:57):
can choose to say no more.
And I don't want to repeat thatbecause pain is only uh
temporary, but transformation ispermanent.
So that's what I keep tellingmyself pain is temporary,
transformation is permanent.
SPEAKER_00 (20:10):
Yeah, and what is what am I here?
And that's the thing.
If you're outsourcing and youare saying, like someone else
come fix me, you don't everlearn those lessons, you don't
ever evolve, you don't everheal.
Like, just want to remind youguys of that because yeah,
there's too many out thereoutsourcing.
Like, look, look at all thestuff around us.
I'm not talking aboutpractitioners, but again, in the
(20:31):
spiritual world, let me do um,okay, I'll give you an example
in the spiritual world.
Let me use oracle cards, let mego see a psychic, let me do
this.
Yes, yes, why you have anintuition.
Like, again, if you're usingsomeone because you're like,
this is fun, or I just want alittle guidance, but stop
seeking full-on answers outsideyourself.
SPEAKER_01 (20:54):
Dude, that was so me.
Because I was like, wait aminute, do I leave?
Do I not leave?
Do I leave?
Is it time to leave?
Is it time to leave arelationship?
And I was like, okay, let me dothis one reading.
Let me okay, okay, okay.
So she said this, no, no, no,no, let me try somebody else.
I mean, and then I was like, oh,and then my intuition kept
telling me, like, it was talkingto me.
So, but I, but oh my goodness,you just, you know, you you just
(21:14):
nailed like what I went throughtoo, as well.
Like, I kept outsourcing the,you know, like and then you
didn't you wouldn't get thelessons.
SPEAKER_00 (21:21):
Yeah, you wouldn't get the lessons if you keep
doing that.
And that's what people don't getis like the stuff will keep
coming back.
This is why people on a physicallevel will will come to me and
say, like, yeah, I worked withso and so and my symptoms were
amazing.
I felt great for a year and ahalf, two years, but everything
came back, and then they comeback again, and then they come
back again.
(21:41):
I'm like, you're not diggingdeep enough, you know, you're
you're just outsourcing again.
SPEAKER_01 (21:47):
Yeah, you're not learning the lesson.
It's kind of like, you know,when it like think about the
curriculum, right?
The lessons in class, you know,if that if the class has not
learned this lesson, they gottarepeat it because they're not
gonna pass this the test thatthey take.
You gotta repeat that, you know,the lesson and repeat it again
and again, and you're gonna, youknow, I mean, sometimes they
give up on you and be like,okay, fine, you didn't learn the
lesson.
That's it.
(22:07):
You're gonna you're stuck hereat this math level.
SPEAKER_00 (22:09):
But but yeah, that's the same thing at a soul level.
Your soul's like, What did youlearn the lesson?
No, okay, we're gonna just keeprepeating that.
SPEAKER_01 (22:16):
Yes, and we are gonna dive too too deep into
that with like the soul, becauseright now you and I are really
like getting deep into this.
And I know some we may ruffle alot of feathers regarding the
like you know, the lifetime andthe whatever, and the soul and
and stuff like that, but um, itis what it is.
We're here to ruffle feathersand we're here to uh you know
(22:38):
not accept the narrative thatwas, you know, given to us.
And both of us do come fromreally religious backgrounds,
and we are still believers, westill have faith, but we just do
it our own way, and we arereally digging deep into this
new type of spirituality andtruly, truly, truly
understanding our soul's missionand our soul contracts.
And the other day I even wastelling myself, like, because I
(22:59):
was really hating on you know,someone, and I was like, you
know what, Denise, who am Iright now?
To like my soul made a contractwith that person's soul, like,
do not interfere, stay out ofthe way, you know what I mean?
Like, stay out of the way andaccept that, accept that lesson
and learn from the pattern sothey don't repeat.
So, yeah.
So I was just like, I was reallyhonoring my soul and be like,
(23:21):
let the body get out of the way.
Alrighty, we're nearing the end,so we are doing something
different this time around.
We are going to end with a quickmantra for you, or a quick
affirmation, and with somegrounding breaths.
So we are going to inhale forfour, hold for four, and exhale
(23:41):
for eight.
And our mantra for today, or ouraffirmation, is I am loved
exactly as I am.
So let's do two cycles of thatand we will end our weekend.
SPEAKER_00 (24:49):
In all aspects.
And we'll see you guys on thenext episode.
Welcome to the Heal Yourself podcast, where we dive
deep into all things healing.
I'm Denise, a speech languagepathologist and a self-love
coach for adults and teens.
SPEAKER_00 (00:15):
And I'm Kira, a traditional naturopath and
functional nutritionist, andwe're here to guide you through
the transformative process ofhealing your body, mind, and
soul.
SPEAKER_01 (00:25):
From the latest in functional medicine to nurturing
your relationship with yourself,healing trauma, and even
transforming your money story.
We're here to empower you withthe knowledge and tools to
create lasting change.
SPEAKER_00 (00:39):
So whether you're looking to heal physically,
emotionally, or spiritually,join us as we explore the many
paths to wholeness and wellness.
Hey everyone, welcome back toanother episode of Heal Yourself
Podcast.
Today you got Denise and Italking about outsourcing our
(01:00):
healing.
How do we come up with thesetopics?
Like I don't know.
They just honestly, part of itcame up based on good old social
media and some posts I made.
Um I was like, man, there's alot of people that outsource
their healing.
And we're talking about itthrough both aspects, right?
We're never just making anepisode about physical health,
(01:23):
but it's like outsourcing yourhealing physically and also
spiritually, emotionally,whatever, right?
So when I when I say outsourcinghealing, what comes to you?
SPEAKER_01 (01:35):
Looking outside for my healing, everything.
And we're not just talking, likeyou said, we're not just talking
physical healing, like likealways seeking answer outside,
outside, outside.
Everything is outside of me, youknow, everything is outside.
And then, of course, you and Iare gonna be very transparent
and we are gonna talk about whatwe do as well, right?
Because we also get into it.
And I just have to put it on theside note.
(01:57):
Kira loves to ruffle feathers onFacebook, she loves it, she
loves it.
So if you're not following her,follow her.
Because I love it though.
I love it because it goes withwith our, you know, the the
other episode, you know, what ifI'm or I wonder if I'm wrong,
but whatever.
Kira is like, you are amazingwith that.
Like, you know, whatever.
(02:17):
I may be wrong, or what if I'mwrong?
And I'm willing to put it outthere.
So that's like the ultimate, andI love that because you know, at
the end of the day, like we arelike I I like imagine us, like
we are the palettes, like thepaintings, right?
We can't all be blue becausethat's boring.
We can't all be yellow becausethat's really boring.
(02:38):
Can you imagine like everyone'swalking around yellow?
No, so I think it's just likewhat makes us really wonderful
and you know, unique is the whatwe bring, like all the colors we
bring to the table.
So it's really important that wedon't have to agree with
everything we you put out there.
It's okay.
SPEAKER_00 (02:59):
Yeah, that's so true, and that's the thing.
I I'm I can't even remember whatthe post was, but it definitely
ruffled feathers.
And the thing is, is part ofit's the algorithm, right?
Like the more controversy, themore comments I get.
I know, but they love it, butlike, oh drama.
I mean, my honestly though, mymain purpose is to get people to
(03:19):
think and to question thingsbecause that's the only way we
grow.
And that's the thing, it gets methinking and questioning things.
Um, you know, like I was gettingtriggered by someone else who
had responded to that.
And the funny thing was, is thenI was asking myself, well, what
is this showing me?
So, you know, yeah.
So, okay, outsourcing healing.
SPEAKER_01 (03:41):
Yes, well, it's it's all kind of you know us.
Everything is part of healing,though, Kira.
Like everything we're saying ispart of healing.
And then you and I, what I loveabout us is like we are so
relatable to the personlistening, to the person next
door, because we are so like wejust apply it, like we tell you,
like, hey, we're going throughshit, or we, you know, we we got
triggered through this orthrough that.
(04:03):
Like, we're not all herealmighty, and we outsourced our
healing as well.
So, yeah, let's rewind, go backto the topic.
SPEAKER_00 (04:09):
Well, and I I think it pertains to the topic, but I
agree, like that's how I view itis like I'm looking outside
myself for answers, and that canbe in a multitude of ways.
Again, like physical health.
Oh my gosh, I need anotherpractitioner, I need this, and
there is a difference, right?
Like, there is a difference forme for someone coming to me and
saying, Hey, can you help mesort through all the noise out
(04:33):
there?
There's a billion supplements, amillion different diets, like
different labs, all thesethings.
I want someone to help menavigate my issues versus
someone who's like, I need youto tell me exactly what to do.
And oh, that didn't work.
Next practitioner, I need you totell me exactly what to do.
That is outsourcing yourhealing.
There's a difference betweenreally putting the healing on
(04:57):
someone else versus like, I needsome education, I need some
guidance, I need some coaching.
And there's a fine line there.
And you said the same thing,like we can walk it from a
spiritual path, not from aphysical one.
Like, I don't have any physicalissues right now.
SPEAKER_01 (05:12):
I mean, it's interesting you mentioned that
because, you know, I uh Istarted seeing a new therapist,
and just this past Tuesday we'retalking about it, and he was
saying that yeah, I don't giveadvice or tips to my kids or to
my clients.
You know, we work through it, wetalk about like we present ideas
with, you know, we role play.
(05:32):
You are coming up with yourideas.
Like, here are the pros, hereare the cons.
Because he said it.
I mean, he was very honest andsaid, if I give my kids or my my
clients tips and advice and itdoesn't work for them because we
all have different experiences,it's on me.
Why?
We can coach, he can he canguide me through, direct me,
right?
Like maybe kind of like help menavigate, like instead of, you
(05:55):
know, just kind of like imaginewhen you aren't on maps, right?
You're instead of choosing thelonger route, you're choosing
the shorter route.
He's guiding me through that.
However, I'm still coming upwith my own solutions.
I'm coming out when we're doingthe role play.
I'm the one coming out with theideas and with the questions and
with the answers because we hearit all the time.
The answers are right in frontof us.
(06:17):
No, sorry, the answers arewithin us.
Everything we want is within us.
Yes, sometimes we are a littlebit maybe because of our
conditioning, we may not hearit, we may need the coaching,
but we can't just rely too muchon it.
Because I mean, think about itthis way.
This it just came to me rightnow, this is the form of
addiction.
It is right, and then we have togo back to you and I, right?
(06:38):
When we were jumping from oneperson talking about
manifestation to another, toanother, to another, to another,
to this book, to that book.
To one point, we were listeningto like probably three, four
podcasts at the same time.
I don't know how manyaudiobooks, and you know,
reading from and attending somany.
Oh, this free workshop, thisfree workshop, and the noise
becomes too much.
(06:58):
That is no bueno either, becausethat's also we are addicted to
I'm seeking answers outside ofme instead of you, you know,
getting educated from thesepeople and then actually really
applying it to myself.
I think what we're doingsometimes with outsourcing is
like, oh, wait a minute, I'mlistening to this person, he
said this, okay.
That let me jump to that personbecause I don't want to do the
(07:19):
work that this person said.
Let me jump to that person.
Oh, wait, wait, she, I like thisone, but I don't want, let me
jump to that, to that, to that.
And we're still avoiding lookingwithin and doing the work.
SPEAKER_00 (07:31):
Or people will do it, but they won't like they're
not digging deep enough, orthey're it's becoming a
checklist, right?
Of like, oh, I did this becausethey said that.
Oh, and okay, I'm not healedyet.
Let me do this because thisperson said I need to do that,
check it off my list.
And I like what you said, butI'm also gonna throw in that
(07:51):
busy healing.
I'm gonna call it busy healing,right?
Like, let me do this, let mewatch this webinar, let me take
this course, let me hire thisperson.
Oh, there's another webinar.
This busy healing is a traumaresponse.
And I will own that too, becauseit's absolutely let me create
more chaos in my life, let meoutsource my healing.
(08:14):
I've got to do this, I've got tobounce from person to person, or
you know what I mean?
SPEAKER_01 (08:18):
Like all these different from supplement to
supplement, supplement companyto supplement company, over
researching, tracking everybite.
SPEAKER_00 (08:26):
Yep, that's uh, yes, yes, yes, yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (08:33):
And then sometimes it just becomes too much where
we really need to just kind oflike maybe stop.
And that could be sometimes youand I do this where we are we're
taking a break, like thisweekend, I'm not doing anything,
or this week I'm not doinganything, I'm not listening to
anything, I'm putting pause onall this stuff, all of the
emails, I'm just subscribingfrom this, this, and this,
(08:54):
because it just becomes like Idon't know why diarrhea came to
my mind.
A mental diarrhea.
SPEAKER_00 (09:05):
I'm laughing.
SPEAKER_01 (09:07):
Mental diarrhea, and it's like, you know, it's just
it's just too much where yougotta you gotta really calm it
down and then truly look within.
And looking within can be likejust stopping to listening to
stop listening to all of this,you know.
Pause the podcast that you'relistening to for a week, you
know, unsubscribe from a fewemails, or maybe if you don't
want to unsubscribe from them,don't look at them, or uh, you
(09:30):
know, take a break from thesupplements.
Because some people, I mean, andI know you see it, girlfriend.
Some people are probably on likewhat over than 20 over 20
supplements.
SPEAKER_00 (09:39):
Yeah, I've I've seen it many, many, many times.
And that's all outsourcing.
It's too much for the bot, theliver.
SPEAKER_01 (09:46):
You're not allowing the body to yes, you're not
allowing the body to processthem.
And I remember when we were inschool, like the uh it there was
like something we we learnedabout taking a break from those
supplements, giving them, givingyour your body a break because
your body is getting sooverwhelmed.
And but it all comes down tolike you said, we are craving
the chaos and we continueseeking out and out and out
(10:10):
where when we calm down, theanswers will like we're not even
giving our intuition a chance tospeak to us.
SPEAKER_00 (10:18):
Yeah.
It's like, let me rely onsomeone else to tell me what's
wrong, what's broken, what Ineed to fix.
And it's like, but what ifyou're not broken?
What if you don't need to befixed?
Exactly.
Yeah, what if you have theanswers?
What if you again startquestioning some of those things
of like the diagnosis, or oh mygosh, this all came from my
childhood trauma, or thisstemmed from this, or I believe
(10:42):
I have that, like there's I haveso many examples, and I don't
want to get into them in thehealth space, but it's just so
easy to be like, well, thisperson told me this is my
diagnosis, this is what I needto do, and now I have to live
this forever.
SPEAKER_01 (10:56):
It's like, well, why that's not a death sentence,
exactly.
Like, I think a lot of peoplejust view the any diagnosis as a
death sentence where we haveseen it, and there's proof.
I mean, right now there's AI.
You can definitely look it up.
How many people have actuallyhealed themselves from really
(11:18):
chronic conditions, diseases,whether it is uh, you know,
health-wise or even I mean, I'mlistening to Dr.
Judas Penza's book BecomingSupernatural.
I mean, some of the testimonialsand the stories, I'm like, these
people have like actualconditions where they needed
surgery.
SPEAKER_00 (11:34):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (11:34):
And then they didn't.
SPEAKER_00 (11:36):
Well, so I told you about the documentary heal.
So for for anyone listening, ifyou've not seen the documentary
Heal, highly, highly, highlyrecommend it.
I've seen it two or three timesnow.
Um, probably due for anotherwatch.
It's been a few years, but thiswas the first one that really
opened my eyes to like, oh mygosh, healing is not just what I
thought it was.
(11:57):
It's not just change your dietand take the right supplements
and do the detoxes and you know,all these things that I
initially thought it was.
There was an instance wherethere was a chiropractor, he
broke his spine, but because hewas a chiropractor, he knew,
right, all of the I'll saybones.
(12:17):
I know this is not my specialty,guys.
SPEAKER_01 (12:21):
Vertebrae.
SPEAKER_00 (12:22):
Thank you.
No, that's exactly the word Iwas looking for.
He knew where everything was.
SPEAKER_01 (12:25):
Oh wow, look at that.
Look at me.
SPEAKER_00 (12:28):
Um, so he was paying attention in anatomy class.
You are thank you, thank you.
That's exactly what I wanted tosay.
But he could he would visualizeevery single vertebrae falling
back into place.
And I think it was a year, Idon't know, go watch the
documentary, but I think it wasa year later that he was healed
and they told him he wouldn'twalk again.
(12:49):
Again, it is the power Iremember you telling about it.
SPEAKER_01 (12:51):
Or I or I remember watching it, I think I remember
watching it, but yeah, no, andand it's and I believe it, I
believe it.
SPEAKER_00 (12:58):
And that's just one example, like that's one
physical example.
But the thing is, is if you'reoutsourcing your healing and
saying, I need you to fix me,what would have happened to him?
Like, we need to turn inward,and that's where it goes back to
what you and I have said in thepast.
Stop trying to Amazon primeeverything, your inner healing,
(13:18):
your exterior healing.
Oh, I need to heal this trauma,I need to do this.
You have to go through it.
These are lessons, and you and Ihave been talking about this a
lot.
Everything in your life is hereto teach you something.
Absolutely.
Pushing it away and saying,okay, I just need this to be
gone.
I don't like this situation inmy life, I don't like this
physical symptom.
(13:39):
Somebody take it away from me.
It's just gonna come back untilyou learn an example.
SPEAKER_01 (13:43):
It's gonna come back a different way, or it's gonna
remain, or it's gonna becomepersistent.
Absolutely, absolutely.
And I know that I love how youand I are getting deeper into
different practices that we areincluding them in the course.
Oh my goodness, yay! Like thisis becoming really like we
cannot wait to actually revealit and talk about it even in
(14:03):
more details on differentepisodes.
But I love how we are trulyright now, like, no matter how
hard the kid, because I eventold you in the voice message
today, like, you know, I wasgoing through something
yesterday, and I was like, okay,so I can either start crying
about it and be like, oh my god,pity me, and then I told myself,
(14:23):
like, you know what, Denise, Ilooked at myself in the mirror,
I was like, Do you really wantto continue repeating this like
pattern after pattern, timeafter time, life after platform?
I was like, mm-mm.
So, and yeah, you know, and Ijust changed, I moved from
reactive to proactive, and andagain, I thought I'm including
that in the course.
But anyway, so um, you know whatI mean?
Like, it's just like it, it'sit's something that I was like,
(14:45):
no, like I need to do somethingabout it.
So it's really, really importantto also not like you mentioned
that the chiropractor thathealed his spine, it took him a
year or whatever.
The thing is exactly stopwanting to Amazon prime your
life, your healing or whatever,because it it can't take a day
or two days or a month, becausewe have heard some healing
(15:07):
happening miraculously and justnot a long time, but also there
are people who waited a year,two, or three.
Yeah, so embracing every momentand every step of the way and
remembering, go back to thepresent episode, being in the
present moment, where this isall we have.
Healing happens in the presentmoment, and everything is here
(15:27):
to teach us something.
So instead of hating on it, sowe can continue repeating it,
just embrace it.
I'm not saying go celebrate it,but embrace it that it's here
for you to teach you something,and instead of saying, Why is
this happening to me?
The heck, this is happening tome, what can I learn from this?
What is the opportunity that Ineed to take from this?
(15:48):
And yeah, yeah, and then justlean on yourself.
And I do have a tip I want toadd that when it becomes too
chaotic, shut down everythingfor at least a week, shut down
everything for at least a week,and then do some deep breathing
at least once or twice a day.
And you know, like, and I'm surewe've talked about deep
breathing before in differentepisodes, but it's not really
(16:08):
that hard.
Like, you can take a deepbreath, hold, exhale.
SPEAKER_00 (16:12):
That's well, and I also wanted to throw in there,
don't forget, and I know we'vesaid this before, your exterior
world is just mirroring theinternal world.
So if you're constantly lookingoutside of yourself for healing,
again, whatever we're talking,physical, emotional, spiritual,
(16:34):
it's because you haven't trustedwhat's within.
SPEAKER_01 (16:38):
So yeah, and then including relationship healing,
healing relationships, right?
Because people in our lives are,you know, they're truly here as
mirrors and to show us theunconscious side of us.
So, you know, and I know, like Isaid, we're talking about that
in the course about triggers,and we are gonna dive deep in
the triggers because you reallywant to make sure that you are
(17:00):
addressing those triggersbecause you know, you can want
to heal your your body and thediagnosis that you were that
were thrown at you, but all ofthose are gonna persist and
remain if you are not trulyaddressing those triggers and
changing them once once and forall, so they don't keep
(17:20):
repeating and coming back andthe patterns and stuff like
that, right?
So, I mean, if I look at my lifeand I'm like, whoa, like I mean,
I see this pattern repeatingover and over again, and it's on
me to change that, it's on me todo something about it.
Because it's like, you know, andit reminds me also about like
religion, where I know you and Iare very spiritual, but religion
(17:44):
relies too much on the outside,right?
Let me like praying to, yes, youare you can you can pray to
somebody to guide you, however,that they're not coming to hold
your hand, and yeah, you knowwhat I mean.
Like I'm talking about likeChristianity, where they they
like people believe that likeJesus is gonna come, which I
(18:05):
mean, I don't know, to whatever.
I'm not gonna discuss this, butlike, okay, he's coming to do
what to hold you by the hand andsolve all of your problems.
Yeah, he already showed youthrough the teachings.
Do exactly like he said, andyou'll heal, buddy or missy.
Right.
And like it kind of like, kindof like, I'm like, so what are
(18:26):
you waiting on?
You're gonna wait forever.
SPEAKER_00 (18:29):
I know, right?
But it's again, it's so mucheasier for someone to outsource
it and say, You tell me what todo.
I don't want to look within, Idon't want to feel this pain,
whatever this pain is.
Um, I don't want to do the innerwork, I don't want to look at my
triggers, I don't want to lookat my patterns, I don't want to
look at what lessons I'm beingtaught.
SPEAKER_01 (18:49):
Okay, well, you're just then don't complain and
accept the life.
SPEAKER_00 (18:52):
Well, and it's just gonna keep repeating then.
SPEAKER_01 (18:54):
So it is, it is gonna keep repeating.
It is absolutely, and if itdoesn't repeat the other day, I
was listening to the podcast,you know, the David Gamp
podcast, and he said, So let'ssay, you know, you are in an
abusive relationship, right?
And then you divorce that personand you're like, okay, no more,
I'm not gonna get marriedanymore.
That's it, we're done.
And then it's gonna the same thepatterns are gonna repeat in uh
(19:16):
friendships.
Even if you're gonna be like,Well, I don't want friends
anymore, like, no more, I'm donewith friends.
It's gonna repeat in your, it'sgonna come up in your children.
You know, I don't want to havechildren anymore, it's gonna
come up your neighbors, yourparents, whatever.
Like, it is gonna stay thereuntil you actually go down to
the roots and then just youknow, start pulling pulling it
(19:36):
from from underneath, yeah, anddiscovering the beauty that we
are, and you know, like we saythat to our and remember you
guys, like this is this podcastis also for us because we remind
ourselves every single day, andwe give ourselves pep talk.
We're like, just like yesterday,I looked at myself in the
mirror.
I'm like, you either cancontinue repeating that or you
(19:57):
can choose to say no more.
And I don't want to repeat thatbecause pain is only uh
temporary, but transformation ispermanent.
So that's what I keep tellingmyself pain is temporary,
transformation is permanent.
SPEAKER_00 (20:10):
Yeah, and what is what am I here?
And that's the thing.
If you're outsourcing and youare saying, like someone else
come fix me, you don't everlearn those lessons, you don't
ever evolve, you don't everheal.
Like, just want to remind youguys of that because yeah,
there's too many out thereoutsourcing.
Like, look, look at all thestuff around us.
I'm not talking aboutpractitioners, but again, in the
(20:31):
spiritual world, let me do um,okay, I'll give you an example
in the spiritual world.
Let me use oracle cards, let mego see a psychic, let me do
this.
Yes, yes, why you have anintuition.
Like, again, if you're usingsomeone because you're like,
this is fun, or I just want alittle guidance, but stop
seeking full-on answers outsideyourself.
SPEAKER_01 (20:54):
Dude, that was so me.
Because I was like, wait aminute, do I leave?
Do I not leave?
Do I leave?
Is it time to leave?
Is it time to leave arelationship?
And I was like, okay, let me dothis one reading.
Let me okay, okay, okay.
So she said this, no, no, no,no, let me try somebody else.
I mean, and then I was like, oh,and then my intuition kept
telling me, like, it was talkingto me.
So, but I, but oh my goodness,you just, you know, you you just
(21:14):
nailed like what I went throughtoo, as well.
Like, I kept outsourcing the,you know, like and then you
didn't you wouldn't get thelessons.
SPEAKER_00 (21:21):
Yeah, you wouldn't get the lessons if you keep
doing that.
And that's what people don't getis like the stuff will keep
coming back.
This is why people on a physicallevel will will come to me and
say, like, yeah, I worked withso and so and my symptoms were
amazing.
I felt great for a year and ahalf, two years, but everything
came back, and then they comeback again, and then they come
back again.
(21:41):
I'm like, you're not diggingdeep enough, you know, you're
you're just outsourcing again.
SPEAKER_01 (21:47):
Yeah, you're not learning the lesson.
It's kind of like, you know,when it like think about the
curriculum, right?
The lessons in class, you know,if that if the class has not
learned this lesson, they gottarepeat it because they're not
gonna pass this the test thatthey take.
You gotta repeat that, you know,the lesson and repeat it again
and again, and you're gonna, youknow, I mean, sometimes they
give up on you and be like,okay, fine, you didn't learn the
lesson.
That's it.
(22:07):
You're gonna you're stuck hereat this math level.
SPEAKER_00 (22:09):
But but yeah, that's the same thing at a soul level.
Your soul's like, What did youlearn the lesson?
No, okay, we're gonna just keeprepeating that.
SPEAKER_01 (22:16):
Yes, and we are gonna dive too too deep into
that with like the soul, becauseright now you and I are really
like getting deep into this.
And I know some we may ruffle alot of feathers regarding the
like you know, the lifetime andthe whatever, and the soul and
and stuff like that, but um, itis what it is.
We're here to ruffle feathersand we're here to uh you know
(22:38):
not accept the narrative thatwas, you know, given to us.
And both of us do come fromreally religious backgrounds,
and we are still believers, westill have faith, but we just do
it our own way, and we arereally digging deep into this
new type of spirituality andtruly, truly, truly
understanding our soul's missionand our soul contracts.
And the other day I even wastelling myself, like, because I
(22:59):
was really hating on you know,someone, and I was like, you
know what, Denise, who am Iright now?
To like my soul made a contractwith that person's soul, like,
do not interfere, stay out ofthe way, you know what I mean?
Like, stay out of the way andaccept that, accept that lesson
and learn from the pattern sothey don't repeat.
So, yeah.
So I was just like, I was reallyhonoring my soul and be like,
(23:21):
let the body get out of the way.
Alrighty, we're nearing the end,so we are doing something
different this time around.
We are going to end with a quickmantra for you, or a quick
affirmation, and with somegrounding breaths.
So we are going to inhale forfour, hold for four, and exhale
(23:41):
for eight.
And our mantra for today, or ouraffirmation, is I am loved
exactly as I am.
So let's do two cycles of thatand we will end our weekend.
SPEAKER_00 (24:49):
In all aspects.
And we'll see you guys on thenext episode.
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Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang
Ding dong! Join your culture consultants, Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang, on an unforgettable journey into the beating heart of CULTURE. Alongside sizzling special guests, they GET INTO the hottest pop-culture moments of the day and the formative cultural experiences that turned them into Culturistas. Produced by the Big Money Players Network and iHeartRadio.
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.