April 30, 2025 • 18 mins
Randy and Beverly dive into how people use things like names, pet names, and familiar phrases to create connectivity in relationships. The things people say might mean different things depending on the context but most couples don't really talk about what these common things really mean... and they're missing out on a really connecting conversation. If you're looking for ways to connect more deeply in every conversation... you'll want to talk about this one.
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Episode Transcript
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SPEAKER_00 (00:00):
Welcome to Heart vs.
Head, a podcast that helpscouples communicate and fight
better.
Here are your hosts, RandiHampton and Beverly Craddock.
SPEAKER_01 (00:20):
Hey everybody, welcome to the podcast.
Today we are not going to talkabout the big heavy thing I
dropped on my toe a few minutesago, which has me going, ow, but
we are going to talk aboutsomething different.
Hi, Beverly.
(01:00):
I love yous.
I have three different I loveyous.
(01:25):
Just for you, Beverly, threedifferent I love yous.
SPEAKER_02 (01:28):
I
SPEAKER_01 (01:29):
know.
Cause we talked about it and yourecognize them all and you're,
you're aware of them all now.
But as a head, I say, I love youwhen I think about it.
So I'll be, I'll be sitting onthe couch and Beverly's sitting
there and I'll look over andshe's doing her thing.
And I'll think, Oh, I love her.
And I'll say, I love you,Beverly.
(01:51):
And that's kind of the main, Ilove you.
It's the one when I'm thinkingabout you.
SPEAKER_02 (01:58):
Right.
And I think a long time ago, I,asked you about that because as
many times as I say sorry in aday, and you can probably catch
up on that podcast, Randy says,I love you.
And so I had to inquire aboutthat because it just doesn't
roll off my tongue as much as itdoes with Randy.
So now I understand it.
SPEAKER_01 (02:19):
Yeah, I think it, I say it.
It's a head thing.
I think we say what we're kindof thinking.
Second, I love you that I havefor Beverly is quite frankly,
not what I'm thinking about.
But when I'm feeling aboutmyself, I will say, I love you
when I kind of need Beverly tosay, I love you too, or to kind
(02:41):
of come back at me where momentswhere I'm looking for
connection, support, words ofaffirmation, those kinds of
things.
So I might be feeling bad andsay, oh, I love you.
And
SPEAKER_02 (02:54):
then I know to say, I love you too.
SPEAKER_01 (02:57):
And yeah, and that's, and she's gotten
actually very good about that.
this because she knows that themore, I don't want to call it
the whiny I love you, but thewhiny I love you is really me
needing something from her.
So I've got the I love you whereI think about her.
I've got the I love you where Ineed something from her.
And then I have this reallyweird I love you.
(03:21):
Beverly does things, and I thinkall hearts do things.
We've talked about this before,and I use the word crazy, and
it's not crazy in a mentalsense.
It's just kind of crazy wacky.
Beverly will say things that area little wacky sometimes because
she gets a little hearty and Idon't understand all that stuff.
And she'll say things andbecause it just ignites my, oh
(03:45):
my God, this person is sodifferent and wonderful in that
way, I will say, I love you,Beverly, because I don't
understand maybe what she'ssaying or why she's saying what
she's saying or how her mind iscoming at it, but I say I love
you, Beverly, because it remindsme of the difference between us
(04:11):
and really maybe the value ofthat difference in my life for
variety, for wackiness, forfunny, for all the things, all
the humor that you and I have inour relationship about all the
things that we do so verydifferently.
SPEAKER_02 (04:27):
I do appreciate that you say I love you instead of
that Because that would beoffensive.
(05:00):
from time to time is we havethem go through a list of
definitions just to improvetheir communication to
understand what words mean toeach other.
I mean, you're going to spendyour entire life with this
person.
I think it's worth having a20-minute conversation as to,
hey, when you call me crazy,what is it you're implying?
(05:20):
What is it you're really saying?
So over the years, I've becomevery familiar with Randy's use
of crazy, and I even now amactually proud when he says that
I'm crazy, because the way Ilook at it is I'd rather be
crazy than boring.
Not to say that Randy's boring,but heads can be very quiet,
(05:43):
very still, very unemotional,very, well, again, logical to my
illogical.
And I realized that I just wantto be who I am and I embrace who
I am with the full respect andpride that a heart would have.
So he might think I'm crazy, butevery time where I've explained
(06:06):
what I said or why I said it, healways says afterwards, well,
that makes sense.
It's just maybe the initial wayI say it.
Plus hearts love adjectives,right?
SPEAKER_01 (06:16):
They imbue our words with feelings.
Yes,
SPEAKER_02 (06:19):
they're the spice of life.
SPEAKER_01 (06:20):
Hearts would love adjectives.
We do talk about crazy, and Inever mean it in an offensive
way.
It's always kind of meant in anendearing way about the way that
Beverly's mind works in a waythat's different than the way my
mind works.
When we were kind of originallytalking about hearts being
(06:41):
crazy, we were also at the sametime talking about how heads are
typically viewed as narcissists.
We are the ones that people go,oh, yeah, that person's such a
narcissist.
And no, we're not.
It's kind of a definitionsthing.
It may seem narcissistic attimes when we're stuck in our
head, but it isn't that we'reactual, you know, diagnosable
(07:06):
narcissists.
Those are pretty rare.
So we talk about hearts beingcrazy and heads being a bit
robotic out of their feelingsand not really concerned about
other people, which is a broadoverstatement and fits kind of
people go, oh, that'snarcissist.
Well, not in the way that wetalk about it.
So it's not that hearts arecrazy and that heads are
(07:28):
narcissists.
We just kind to use those wordsbecause those are, I think, the
words that everybodyunderstands.
And it's how we feel sometimes.
Hearts feel like we'renarcissists and we feel like our
hearts are crazy.
And so Beverly and I, I guess,have taken those on.
Beverly mentions definitions andthat's really where the three I
love you's comes in because wecan say things and mean
(07:48):
different things, but it'sreally important to understand
how our partner is definingthings, how we're defining
things so that we can have aconversation and mean the same
thing.
If you have differentdefinitions Yeah.
And it also matters, Randyalready said this
SPEAKER_02 (08:21):
as well, that the tone and the expression.
So what I've learned to do isreally listen for the different
way he says I love you.
And then sometimes non-verbally,80% of our communication is
done.
So I look at his facialexpression or his eyes, so
(08:43):
forth, and that really gives mea cue.
I have to say for a while, thecrazy I love you did set me back
a little bit for a while becausewhen he says that, I have to
pause in my mind and say tomyself, Why was that crazy,
right?
Because it's just so natural forme.
I want to say, though, I havekind of the same thing for you,
(09:08):
only different.
So the way I do it differentlyis in the way that I say your
name.
I have three Randys.
SPEAKER_01 (09:15):
Okay.
SPEAKER_02 (09:16):
I think you know some of this.
Some of it, yeah.
Well, kind of.
Randy's formal name is Randall,and I've known that since the
beginning.
And so when he's in trouble,it's Randall.
SPEAKER_01 (09:27):
Randall?
If Beverly calls me Randall,It's a lot like my mom when she
would use Randall.
When they bust out Randall andyour middle name, then you're
really in trouble.
You've done something wherethey're trying to draw your
attention to your problem.
So that's where I come in.
Though I should say Beverly'sdaughter, my stepdaughter, she's
(09:49):
delightful.
She and I are tight.
She will often call me Randall,and it's not in a hey, you're in
trouble way.
But Beverly uses Randall.
I know there's a problem.
So that one I am familiar
SPEAKER_02 (10:02):
with.
And luckily in the 15 years,I've only said Randall Bryan
just a handful.
SPEAKER_01 (10:08):
Yeah, very, very few times that you bust out the
middle name.
SPEAKER_02 (10:11):
What's nice is when I say Randall, I don't even
think about it.
It just comes out because he isgoing down a very bad path.
And when I say Randall, he knowsit and he backs up pretty
SPEAKER_01 (10:24):
quick.
He's going down a very bad pathand all my head friends out
there hear that and go, yes,let's keep going down the very
bad path.
SPEAKER_02 (10:34):
It usually leads to conflict.
So I don't know why you would godown that
SPEAKER_01 (10:38):
road.
You try to head it off and I getmore stubborn and bull my way
down the Randall road.
But anyways, okay.
So Randall, yeah, that makessense.
SPEAKER_02 (10:46):
Of course, I use the second one, which is your name,
Randy.
For a long time, I always calledRandy, Randy, and I wanted a pet
name because couples have petnames and I have pet names for
my children.
I was really trying to work on apet name.
Early on, Randy called me Boo,and it was very endearing.
I loved it.
So I wanted to match that andhave a pet name for him.
(11:09):
I
SPEAKER_01 (11:10):
still call her Boo.
It just started early on.
SPEAKER_02 (11:14):
Yes.
For Randy, I really just hadtrouble coming up with one.
I'm not sure what that wasabout.
However, in hindsight...
SPEAKER_01 (11:21):
Dumbass didn't stick at all.
Hey, Dumbass.
No, that one didn't.
That was not a good pet name.
I think I
SPEAKER_02 (11:28):
butt-hooked, maybe.
occasionally, but dumbass is notone of the
SPEAKER_01 (11:33):
ones.
Yeah.
None of those seem to be veryendearing,
SPEAKER_02 (11:39):
but people do love to hear their name and they're
very responsive to it.
In fact, they encourage couplesto use each other's first name a
lot.
When we speak to each other, wetend to get into a habit of
saying, Hey you, and it justdoesn't have the same appeal.
SPEAKER_01 (11:56):
Names matter.
We hear them so much.
I mean, it's the, It's probablythe one word that we've heard
the most in our life.
So names are important and theyconnect people.
SPEAKER_02 (12:08):
Yes, they make us feel special.
And it really sends a messagethat, oh, they know me.
So very important reasons to usethat first name in a very
natural way.
So that brings me down to thethird word, which is my
endearing pet name.
And that is really just babe.
And it's not something that Ithought about.
(12:31):
I mean, I did think about it fora long time, but it just was
natural.
And when I started using it, itstuck.
So Babe is really that affectionname, that bond and closeness
building name, and somethingthat I use in a very meaningful
way.
And I hope Randy receives itthat way.
(12:52):
The problem with pet names,though, is that they tend to
wane over time.
And I'm kind of curious curiousdo you feel like our pet names
have faded a bit over the years
SPEAKER_01 (13:03):
i don't know i think at some point you get to be that
that old couple you forget theiryou forget their name no you
that wasn't where i was going atall um i love you um that was
totally off track now no i ithink you get to be that old
(13:26):
couple where it's cute you'rethe couple at the park that the
young couple's Oh, I hope we'rethat much in love when we're
when we're that age, you know,walking around shuffling about
the park holding hands.
And so I think sometimes thosethose endearing names kind of
have nostalgic value.
So I'm not sure that they wane.
(13:47):
I think they can maybe they canchange meaning, I guess.
But I've never felt like Boo waswaning.
I still use it.
It's not waning, Boo.
It's sunny out.
outside.
Sorry.
See what happens when you get meoff track.
SPEAKER_02 (14:04):
What's interesting is pet names in the US, they say
that about two-thirds of coupleshave pet names, so they are
popular.
Most couples have them.
If you're not a pet name person,that's fine.
You're not necessarily missingout.
There are other ways to showaffection in just maybe saying
(14:24):
their real name.
It's okay either way, but theydid say out of those two-thirds
that use pet names, more thanhalf, almost like three-quarters
are also happy couples,self-identified as happy.
Not to say that it's a directcorrelation, but good to know.
SPEAKER_01 (14:44):
So the rest of you out there are the hey you
couples, I guess.
I guess you're just saying heyyou or using their name.
Anyways, whatever you are,however you use pet names,
however you say I love you indifferent ways, we'd love to
hear from you It's kind of funwhen you start a podcast.
And we started Valentine's Day,2025 Valentine's Day of this
(15:06):
year, so only a couple monthsago.
It's really kind of fun to startto hear from people that are
listening to the podcast.
So thank you for those of youthat have reached out.
If you have a story, if you havea question, if you've got
something you want to shareabout what's going on in your
relationship and the waycommunication works or does not
work, we absolutely would loveto hear from you.
So if you've got pet names or ifyou've had trouble even coming
(15:29):
up with a pet name for yourpartner.
You have challenges in that way.
Let us know.
These are the fun topics that wereally kind of love to chat with
people about.
And we may have stuff wrong oryou may do it different.
And we'd love to know that.
Info atheartandheadcoaching.com.
Info atheartandheadcoaching.com.
(15:50):
Drop us an email.
We'd love to know that.
SPEAKER_02 (15:53):
Anything more you want to add today, Beverly?
I guess the last thing I wouldsay is what I love about pet
names is that it's almost like asecret that we share.
So if we're out shopping or atthe beach and I hear you say
boo, it's that kind of secretcode for I love you in a lot of
(16:15):
ways without saying I love younecessarily in public.
Not that that's a bad thing, butjust like how we are careful
with PDAs in public, not usnecessarily, but everybody in
general is respectful aboutPublic displays of affection for
PDAs.
I think the pet names give usthat coverage as well, because
(16:37):
when you call someone a petname, people probably assume
that it's a name, but they don'tknow.
They don't know the backstory.
They don't know exactly whatthat means.
So it's kind of this cool littleconnection, kind of an intimate
connection that we share thatwe're able to use anywhere.
And it's accepted, but yet wecan feel very close, even in a
public place.
SPEAKER_01 (16:59):
Android.
thought about that.
And that is an interesting wayto connect even in public.
Today's takeaway, sit down withyour partner, figure out how you
use language, work on thosedefinitions.
How do you define love?
How do you define relationships,success and connection and all
of those things that happen inyour relationship?
(17:19):
And as you talk about thosedefinitions, you'll start to see
some of these nuances, even inyour own conversations and ways
you can tweak your conversationto be more helpful more useful
and more connecting in yourrelationship.
Thank you everybody for tuningin.
It was great talking with you.
We'll talk to you nextWednesday.
Bye everybody.
SPEAKER_00 (17:46):
Thanks for listening to Heart vs.
Head.
You can learn more atheartandheadcoaching.com and
check out new podcast episodesevery Wednesday.
If you have a question for Randyand Beverly, send an email to
info atheartandheadcoaching.com.
Welcome to Heart vs.
Head, a podcast that helpscouples communicate and fight
better.
Here are your hosts, RandiHampton and Beverly Craddock.
SPEAKER_01 (00:20):
Hey everybody, welcome to the podcast.
Today we are not going to talkabout the big heavy thing I
dropped on my toe a few minutesago, which has me going, ow, but
we are going to talk aboutsomething different.
Hi, Beverly.
(01:00):
I love yous.
I have three different I loveyous.
(01:25):
Just for you, Beverly, threedifferent I love yous.
SPEAKER_02 (01:28):
I
SPEAKER_01 (01:29):
know.
Cause we talked about it and yourecognize them all and you're,
you're aware of them all now.
But as a head, I say, I love youwhen I think about it.
So I'll be, I'll be sitting onthe couch and Beverly's sitting
there and I'll look over andshe's doing her thing.
And I'll think, Oh, I love her.
And I'll say, I love you,Beverly.
(01:51):
And that's kind of the main, Ilove you.
It's the one when I'm thinkingabout you.
SPEAKER_02 (01:58):
Right.
And I think a long time ago, I,asked you about that because as
many times as I say sorry in aday, and you can probably catch
up on that podcast, Randy says,I love you.
And so I had to inquire aboutthat because it just doesn't
roll off my tongue as much as itdoes with Randy.
So now I understand it.
SPEAKER_01 (02:19):
Yeah, I think it, I say it.
It's a head thing.
I think we say what we're kindof thinking.
Second, I love you that I havefor Beverly is quite frankly,
not what I'm thinking about.
But when I'm feeling aboutmyself, I will say, I love you
when I kind of need Beverly tosay, I love you too, or to kind
(02:41):
of come back at me where momentswhere I'm looking for
connection, support, words ofaffirmation, those kinds of
things.
So I might be feeling bad andsay, oh, I love you.
And
SPEAKER_02 (02:54):
then I know to say, I love you too.
SPEAKER_01 (02:57):
And yeah, and that's, and she's gotten
actually very good about that.
this because she knows that themore, I don't want to call it
the whiny I love you, but thewhiny I love you is really me
needing something from her.
So I've got the I love you whereI think about her.
I've got the I love you where Ineed something from her.
And then I have this reallyweird I love you.
(03:21):
Beverly does things, and I thinkall hearts do things.
We've talked about this before,and I use the word crazy, and
it's not crazy in a mentalsense.
It's just kind of crazy wacky.
Beverly will say things that area little wacky sometimes because
she gets a little hearty and Idon't understand all that stuff.
And she'll say things andbecause it just ignites my, oh
(03:45):
my God, this person is sodifferent and wonderful in that
way, I will say, I love you,Beverly, because I don't
understand maybe what she'ssaying or why she's saying what
she's saying or how her mind iscoming at it, but I say I love
you, Beverly, because it remindsme of the difference between us
(04:11):
and really maybe the value ofthat difference in my life for
variety, for wackiness, forfunny, for all the things, all
the humor that you and I have inour relationship about all the
things that we do so verydifferently.
SPEAKER_02 (04:27):
I do appreciate that you say I love you instead of
that Because that would beoffensive.
(05:00):
from time to time is we havethem go through a list of
definitions just to improvetheir communication to
understand what words mean toeach other.
I mean, you're going to spendyour entire life with this
person.
I think it's worth having a20-minute conversation as to,
hey, when you call me crazy,what is it you're implying?
(05:20):
What is it you're really saying?
So over the years, I've becomevery familiar with Randy's use
of crazy, and I even now amactually proud when he says that
I'm crazy, because the way Ilook at it is I'd rather be
crazy than boring.
Not to say that Randy's boring,but heads can be very quiet,
(05:43):
very still, very unemotional,very, well, again, logical to my
illogical.
And I realized that I just wantto be who I am and I embrace who
I am with the full respect andpride that a heart would have.
So he might think I'm crazy, butevery time where I've explained
(06:06):
what I said or why I said it, healways says afterwards, well,
that makes sense.
It's just maybe the initial wayI say it.
Plus hearts love adjectives,right?
SPEAKER_01 (06:16):
They imbue our words with feelings.
Yes,
SPEAKER_02 (06:19):
they're the spice of life.
SPEAKER_01 (06:20):
Hearts would love adjectives.
We do talk about crazy, and Inever mean it in an offensive
way.
It's always kind of meant in anendearing way about the way that
Beverly's mind works in a waythat's different than the way my
mind works.
When we were kind of originallytalking about hearts being
(06:41):
crazy, we were also at the sametime talking about how heads are
typically viewed as narcissists.
We are the ones that people go,oh, yeah, that person's such a
narcissist.
And no, we're not.
It's kind of a definitionsthing.
It may seem narcissistic attimes when we're stuck in our
head, but it isn't that we'reactual, you know, diagnosable
(07:06):
narcissists.
Those are pretty rare.
So we talk about hearts beingcrazy and heads being a bit
robotic out of their feelingsand not really concerned about
other people, which is a broadoverstatement and fits kind of
people go, oh, that'snarcissist.
Well, not in the way that wetalk about it.
So it's not that hearts arecrazy and that heads are
(07:28):
narcissists.
We just kind to use those wordsbecause those are, I think, the
words that everybodyunderstands.
And it's how we feel sometimes.
Hearts feel like we'renarcissists and we feel like our
hearts are crazy.
And so Beverly and I, I guess,have taken those on.
Beverly mentions definitions andthat's really where the three I
love you's comes in because wecan say things and mean
(07:48):
different things, but it'sreally important to understand
how our partner is definingthings, how we're defining
things so that we can have aconversation and mean the same
thing.
If you have differentdefinitions Yeah.
And it also matters, Randyalready said this
SPEAKER_02 (08:21):
as well, that the tone and the expression.
So what I've learned to do isreally listen for the different
way he says I love you.
And then sometimes non-verbally,80% of our communication is
done.
So I look at his facialexpression or his eyes, so
(08:43):
forth, and that really gives mea cue.
I have to say for a while, thecrazy I love you did set me back
a little bit for a while becausewhen he says that, I have to
pause in my mind and say tomyself, Why was that crazy,
right?
Because it's just so natural forme.
I want to say, though, I havekind of the same thing for you,
(09:08):
only different.
So the way I do it differentlyis in the way that I say your
name.
I have three Randys.
SPEAKER_01 (09:15):
Okay.
SPEAKER_02 (09:16):
I think you know some of this.
Some of it, yeah.
Well, kind of.
Randy's formal name is Randall,and I've known that since the
beginning.
And so when he's in trouble,it's Randall.
SPEAKER_01 (09:27):
Randall?
If Beverly calls me Randall,It's a lot like my mom when she
would use Randall.
When they bust out Randall andyour middle name, then you're
really in trouble.
You've done something wherethey're trying to draw your
attention to your problem.
So that's where I come in.
Though I should say Beverly'sdaughter, my stepdaughter, she's
(09:49):
delightful.
She and I are tight.
She will often call me Randall,and it's not in a hey, you're in
trouble way.
But Beverly uses Randall.
I know there's a problem.
So that one I am familiar
SPEAKER_02 (10:02):
with.
And luckily in the 15 years,I've only said Randall Bryan
just a handful.
SPEAKER_01 (10:08):
Yeah, very, very few times that you bust out the
middle name.
SPEAKER_02 (10:11):
What's nice is when I say Randall, I don't even
think about it.
It just comes out because he isgoing down a very bad path.
And when I say Randall, he knowsit and he backs up pretty
SPEAKER_01 (10:24):
quick.
He's going down a very bad pathand all my head friends out
there hear that and go, yes,let's keep going down the very
bad path.
SPEAKER_02 (10:34):
It usually leads to conflict.
So I don't know why you would godown that
SPEAKER_01 (10:38):
road.
You try to head it off and I getmore stubborn and bull my way
down the Randall road.
But anyways, okay.
So Randall, yeah, that makessense.
SPEAKER_02 (10:46):
Of course, I use the second one, which is your name,
Randy.
For a long time, I always calledRandy, Randy, and I wanted a pet
name because couples have petnames and I have pet names for
my children.
I was really trying to work on apet name.
Early on, Randy called me Boo,and it was very endearing.
I loved it.
So I wanted to match that andhave a pet name for him.
(11:09):
I
SPEAKER_01 (11:10):
still call her Boo.
It just started early on.
SPEAKER_02 (11:14):
Yes.
For Randy, I really just hadtrouble coming up with one.
I'm not sure what that wasabout.
However, in hindsight...
SPEAKER_01 (11:21):
Dumbass didn't stick at all.
Hey, Dumbass.
No, that one didn't.
That was not a good pet name.
I think I
SPEAKER_02 (11:28):
butt-hooked, maybe.
occasionally, but dumbass is notone of the
SPEAKER_01 (11:33):
ones.
Yeah.
None of those seem to be veryendearing,
SPEAKER_02 (11:39):
but people do love to hear their name and they're
very responsive to it.
In fact, they encourage couplesto use each other's first name a
lot.
When we speak to each other, wetend to get into a habit of
saying, Hey you, and it justdoesn't have the same appeal.
SPEAKER_01 (11:56):
Names matter.
We hear them so much.
I mean, it's the, It's probablythe one word that we've heard
the most in our life.
So names are important and theyconnect people.
SPEAKER_02 (12:08):
Yes, they make us feel special.
And it really sends a messagethat, oh, they know me.
So very important reasons to usethat first name in a very
natural way.
So that brings me down to thethird word, which is my
endearing pet name.
And that is really just babe.
And it's not something that Ithought about.
(12:31):
I mean, I did think about it fora long time, but it just was
natural.
And when I started using it, itstuck.
So Babe is really that affectionname, that bond and closeness
building name, and somethingthat I use in a very meaningful
way.
And I hope Randy receives itthat way.
(12:52):
The problem with pet names,though, is that they tend to
wane over time.
And I'm kind of curious curiousdo you feel like our pet names
have faded a bit over the years
SPEAKER_01 (13:03):
i don't know i think at some point you get to be that
that old couple you forget theiryou forget their name no you
that wasn't where i was going atall um i love you um that was
totally off track now no i ithink you get to be that old
(13:26):
couple where it's cute you'rethe couple at the park that the
young couple's Oh, I hope we'rethat much in love when we're
when we're that age, you know,walking around shuffling about
the park holding hands.
And so I think sometimes thosethose endearing names kind of
have nostalgic value.
So I'm not sure that they wane.
(13:47):
I think they can maybe they canchange meaning, I guess.
But I've never felt like Boo waswaning.
I still use it.
It's not waning, Boo.
It's sunny out.
outside.
Sorry.
See what happens when you get meoff track.
SPEAKER_02 (14:04):
What's interesting is pet names in the US, they say
that about two-thirds of coupleshave pet names, so they are
popular.
Most couples have them.
If you're not a pet name person,that's fine.
You're not necessarily missingout.
There are other ways to showaffection in just maybe saying
(14:24):
their real name.
It's okay either way, but theydid say out of those two-thirds
that use pet names, more thanhalf, almost like three-quarters
are also happy couples,self-identified as happy.
Not to say that it's a directcorrelation, but good to know.
SPEAKER_01 (14:44):
So the rest of you out there are the hey you
couples, I guess.
I guess you're just saying heyyou or using their name.
Anyways, whatever you are,however you use pet names,
however you say I love you indifferent ways, we'd love to
hear from you It's kind of funwhen you start a podcast.
And we started Valentine's Day,2025 Valentine's Day of this
(15:06):
year, so only a couple monthsago.
It's really kind of fun to startto hear from people that are
listening to the podcast.
So thank you for those of youthat have reached out.
If you have a story, if you havea question, if you've got
something you want to shareabout what's going on in your
relationship and the waycommunication works or does not
work, we absolutely would loveto hear from you.
So if you've got pet names or ifyou've had trouble even coming
(15:29):
up with a pet name for yourpartner.
You have challenges in that way.
Let us know.
These are the fun topics that wereally kind of love to chat with
people about.
And we may have stuff wrong oryou may do it different.
And we'd love to know that.
Info atheartandheadcoaching.com.
Info atheartandheadcoaching.com.
(15:50):
Drop us an email.
We'd love to know that.
SPEAKER_02 (15:53):
Anything more you want to add today, Beverly?
I guess the last thing I wouldsay is what I love about pet
names is that it's almost like asecret that we share.
So if we're out shopping or atthe beach and I hear you say
boo, it's that kind of secretcode for I love you in a lot of
(16:15):
ways without saying I love younecessarily in public.
Not that that's a bad thing, butjust like how we are careful
with PDAs in public, not usnecessarily, but everybody in
general is respectful aboutPublic displays of affection for
PDAs.
I think the pet names give usthat coverage as well, because
(16:37):
when you call someone a petname, people probably assume
that it's a name, but they don'tknow.
They don't know the backstory.
They don't know exactly whatthat means.
So it's kind of this cool littleconnection, kind of an intimate
connection that we share thatwe're able to use anywhere.
And it's accepted, but yet wecan feel very close, even in a
public place.
SPEAKER_01 (16:59):
Android.
thought about that.
And that is an interesting wayto connect even in public.
Today's takeaway, sit down withyour partner, figure out how you
use language, work on thosedefinitions.
How do you define love?
How do you define relationships,success and connection and all
of those things that happen inyour relationship?
(17:19):
And as you talk about thosedefinitions, you'll start to see
some of these nuances, even inyour own conversations and ways
you can tweak your conversationto be more helpful more useful
and more connecting in yourrelationship.
Thank you everybody for tuningin.
It was great talking with you.
We'll talk to you nextWednesday.
Bye everybody.
SPEAKER_00 (17:46):
Thanks for listening to Heart vs.
Head.
You can learn more atheartandheadcoaching.com and
check out new podcast episodesevery Wednesday.
If you have a question for Randyand Beverly, send an email to
info atheartandheadcoaching.com.
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