June 12, 2025 • 24 mins
Ever felt like you're chasing an impossible dream of "balance" while juggling motherhood and entrepreneurship? Throw away that tired concept and embrace something more attainable - harmony.
Marianne Hickman knows this journey intimately. An international public speaker who's graced over 2,400 stages worldwide, she's built a multiple six-figure business while raising six children. Her remarkable transformation from single mom on food stamps to successful entrepreneur offers a refreshing perspective on creating harmony between career ambitions and family life.
The key starts with defining what success actually means to you. Marianne guides us through a powerful exercise where we envision our perfect day in vivid detail - from when we wake up to what fills our calendar. This clarity becomes the compass for making small, intentional adjustments that bring us closer to our vision.
One of her most liberating insights? The phrase "No, not right now." These five simple words create boundaries without permanently closing doors, allowing us to focus our energy where it matters most in our current season. As Marianne explains, our biggest enemy isn't evil - it's distraction. When we learn to focus our efforts like a magnifying glass concentrating sunlight, we become exponentially more effective and fulfilled.
Her mission to "make good people crazy wealthy" stems from a conviction that positive messages deserve amplification. The world needs more ethical voices with resources to create good, and Marianne helps business owners monetize their messages through the power of stages.
Perhaps most powerfully, she challenges us to reconsider the purpose of our stories: "Nobody cares about your story. We tell our story so it changes someone else's story." This perspective transforms our narratives from self-centered experiences into meaningful tools that serve others.
For the mompreneur struggling in the trenches, Marianne offers this encouragement: your voice matters, even when you doubt it. The challenges you face today are preparing you to help someone tomorrow, and the most powerful being in the universe has your back.
Ready to turn your story into impact? Download Marianne's free guide at MarianneHickman.com/freegift and discover how your experiences can become the message someone else is desperately waiting to hear.
Grab the Healthy Sustainable Weekly Rhythm Guide for Busy Moms ► ► https://aliesehalcomb.com/weeklyrhythms
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Welcome to the Peaceful Mompreneur.
We are flipping the script onbalance, because balance is a
myth.
Instead of chasing perfection,what if you started searching
for harmony?
We're going to talk all aboutcreating harmony with your
schedule, aligning your choiceswith your values and making
decisions with clarity andconfidence in your God-given
calling.
I'm excited to introduce you toMarianne Hickman.
(00:25):
She is an international publicspeaker and personal speaker
mentor who specializes ininspiring.
I can talk business owners andcoaches to monetize their
message through appearing onstages.
Marianne has been featured onover 2,400 worldwide stages
focusing on enriching andcultivating the development of
(00:48):
your story, message and revenue.
Her life's motto is to makegood people crazy wealthy.
Marianne was a single motherwho brought her family from food
stamps to multiple six-figureincome.
She is married to her bestfriend, richard Hickman, and
together they are raising sixchildren.
Marianne, thank you so much forjoining us.
(01:08):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
Elise In the pre-green room.
It's just like we were talkingabout it the energy matches.
I love what you are doing andwho you stand for For everyone
that's listening.
If you're not subscribing andfollowing, hit the button right
now because you want to be partof what this woman is building.
Thank you for having me on.
Speaker 1 (01:23):
Thank you so much.
That's so kind.
I appreciate that.
So like we're talking aboutright, where balance is not a
thing, it's you're just figuringout where you are in the season
that you're in Right, and so inyour bio it says you've spoken
at on twenty four hundred stages.
That is a lot.
How do you stay grounded andpresent while you're like doing
(01:44):
all of this career stuff andmanaging, you know, being a
mother to not just one, but likesix kids and you have a husband
and got all the things so like?
What does that look like foryou?
Speaker 2 (01:54):
Oh man, okay.
So, and I could go intopractical tools and all of the
how to's, and I think, first ofall, it's different for
everybody.
We have to decide for what ourown lives look like, what
success actually is Fordifferent moms, for different
women in general, success isgoing to look like different
things for you.
So you can't really tools aremeaningless if we don't know
(02:16):
where we're going or what we'reusing them for.
So the first tool, I guess, isto decide what success looks
like.
I really like to do thisactivity with people that I
mentor with, with students ofmine, with members of my
community, where we sit down andwe say what would be a perfect
day for you, and immediately thelimiting thoughts come up.
I'm like, shove those aside,you can pick them up later.
(02:37):
But what would a perfect day belike?
What time would you wake up?
Who would you wake up next to?
What would you eat forbreakfast?
What would be the first thingyou wanted to do?
On your calendar and every day,once we know where we're going,
we try to make little tweaksand adjustments to get closer to
that perfect day, right?
So in this, how do you keepthings crazy?
(03:02):
You know the schedule frombeing crazy.
It is crazy and it is hard.
It is challenging, challenging,and it's meant to be.
I I don't I don't know if I'm anauthority on perfection,
because I'm so far from that.
There's only one person that'saccomplished that and his name
is Jesus Christ, right, so therest of us are just trying to
figure it out.
And so the the how do you do acareer in business?
Well, you, you get good atsomething by sucking at it long
enough.
So the times where it was uglyand I know I still have those
(03:28):
times the goal is to say how didit get this ugly and what can I
do to contribute to more beautyand more harmony?
And a lot of the times thatmeans changing the approach but
staying determined on the goal.
That's why I want to know whereI'm going.
That's why I want to know whata perfect, successful day looks
like, because then I'm going tochange my approach on how to get
there.
I might have to zigzag a littlebit, you know, and it is
(03:49):
involved, especially recently,saying no to a lot of travel,
which I love to do.
So that's really hard, but itdoesn't support, you know,
raising a toddler right now, andthat's that's the main question
is what supports?
How does my motherhood supportmy passion, which is what I
chose to do for work, and howdoes that support Marianne being
(04:09):
Marianne, and how does thatsupport everything else?
So it's kind of like theopposite of rock paper scissors
where something kills somethingelse, it's.
It's how does something upliftsomething else?
And in any time it doesn'thappen.
That means I'm out of harmonyand I need to adjust the
schedule for next time.
One of the phrases that I havereally come to adopt I heard it
(04:31):
just a couple of weeks ago, butthis is a phrase that has
brought me so much peace overthe last couple of weeks
especially is increase yourtolerance for mistakes.
Increase your tolerance formistakes that you make, increase
your tolerance for mistakesthat other people make, because
that's, that's the mental gym,that's where we're getting
stronger, that's where we'regetting better.
So I mean it's.
(04:51):
I don't know if that answersyour question specifically or
not, but I'm by no means perfectat this, but do I have a lot of
experience in it?
Oh yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Yeah, absolutely, and I love that, because the thing
is, we never arrive at you knowwhatever.
That is right.
Every time we learn something,there's something new to learn.
Every time we know more aboutGod, there's more to know
something about parenting,there's something else that you
got to learn.
Your kids change, and so I loveeverything that you're saying
and, yes, I think you answeredthat.
It's basically it's it is.
It depends on who you are andwhere you are and where you want
(05:23):
to go.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
And.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
I know that's not the answer that everybody wants,
but it's the truth.
Like there's no cookie cutter,there's no like.
Here's the model do this thing,you'll be happy, not a not
thing.
So one of the things that youdid say was that you have to say
no to things, and obviouslyright now you're not traveling
as much because you havetoddlers, and so how do you
determine what is good and whatis not necessarily bad, just not
(05:47):
good for you?
Speaker 2 (05:48):
Well, that's a good question, because the power of
choice is the most powerfulthing that we have.
And you're right.
And the choice is not alwayseasy, because if it were
choosing between bad and good,the choice would be very easy.
We would always choose the goodthing, but more often than not,
we're choosing between good andbetter, and absolutely best
(06:10):
it's.
That's when it gets hard,because there's all of these
good things are in front of usand one is going to be good and
sue this for a little while, butone thing is like the best
thing for us, and how do we knowand understand the difference?
This principle is a principlethat marketers use.
It's a principle thatsalespeople use.
It's a principle thatfulfillment teams use.
It's a principle that companiesuse and it's a principle that
(06:31):
influencers use.
It's very common.
It's probably going to annoy alot of people when I say it, but
it's niching down and here'swhat I mean by that.
I know I've already lost somepeople by saying that because we
are so sick of this phrase,right, but I think about it in
terms of like a magnifying glass.
I don't know if you've ever hadlike a magnifying glass in your
hand right, and if you're likeme.
You go out on the sidewalk andsee what you do with the light
(06:53):
and how you can bend and warpthe light and how you can make a
spotlight out of it or you canmake a little pinpoint of light
out of it that actually you knowyou can burn the weeds in
between the cracks in thesidewalks and stuff like that.
Focus is so powerful.
I think the enemy's biggesttool against us is not evil,
it's distraction, because that'swhen he can get most of us is
(07:13):
this distraction, and it'sdistraction with the good that
keeps us from the best.
And so when I was firstlearning about this, it was when
I was actually doingphotography.
I studied photography in college, had a business before I went
to college, and when I firststarted doing photography, I
would say yes to every photoshoot possible, because I didn't
(07:33):
know this, but I didn't knowwhat I wanted to do.
So I said yes to the familyshoots.
I said yes to the travelingphotography.
I said yes to newbornphotography.
I said yes to puppy photography.
I said yes to maternity andgraduation and and prom and and
anyone that needed a photo.
I said yes to it.
Weddings, you name it.
And I remember my firstwindfall.
(07:55):
I was like I had the bestproblem Any business owner wants
of having too many clients andnot enough fulfillment.
It was a struggle because, man,I remember I had, I was driving
down I-15.
A lot of thinking happens in mycar.
I don't know about you, butthat's where, like I chew on
stuff right Driving down I-15,and uh, this I'm talking to God
(08:16):
Cause he's, he sits co-pilotlots of times and I was like,
listen, I have so much to do.
I have three photo shootsbacked up overdue on my computer
.
The clients are starting to bugme.
They're late.
I'm.
I have two shoots today.
I'm getting backed up on themand one of them is a wedding,
which means really high pressure.
I only get one day to do thisright, because we don't get to
(08:36):
redo the wedding if the memorycard fails or if the batteries
die or if something malfunctions.
It's very high pressure.
Usually, everyone else isfeeling that high pressure of
the wedding.
We've got mom's ill as bride'sill as groom's ill as the
screaming toddlers Right and wehave to make it perfect.
And so all this high pressurecame in and in this conversation
I'm praying for help to getthese shoots out the door.
(08:57):
I'm praying for help to be ajovial person on these, these
productions, and I'm sittingdown.
At the end of that day after all, my prayers went up and I got
all the feedback and this iswhat God told me.
He said you're allowed to sayno.
There's this abundance of chaoswhen we say yes to too many
things.
And God said guess what?
(09:20):
You are allowed to pick andchoose what you want to do.
So I started saying no toweddings, even though I was
really good at it.
I started saying no to weddingsbecause I didn't have fun.
And then I started saying no topet photography because that'd
be crazy.
And then I started saying no tonewborn photography because
they're crazy too.
They're just as crazy as thepuppies.
And then I started saying no tothe large family shoots with 50
(09:42):
people because it wasn't funfor me.
And I really started honing in.
I only said yes to couplestravel photography and that was
so fun, it was so fulfilling andit was so relieving to say no
to everything else and be ableto say, no, that's not what I do
, that's what somebody else says.
I can refer you if you want,but no, that's not what I do.
(10:04):
And that laser focus, just likewe get with the magnifying
glass.
That magnifying glass, thatbeam of light, is so much more
potent and powerful when it isfocused on one thing, and I've
learned it in my photographybusiness and I'm continually
relearning this lesson over andover and over again with my kids
, with my parenting, with thedifferent seasons of life that
(10:25):
we go through what's the focusright now?
What's the focus right now, andas long as I know the focus
right now, oh my gosh, what arelief it is to say no, that's
not for me right now.
No, not right now.
That is one of the mostpowerful phrases.
I learned it from my friend,hope Zavara.
She's one of my favorite people.
When I heard her say that, Iwas like, oh, that huge sigh of
(10:50):
relief and the burden just felloff.
I get to say no, not right now,and sometimes that means saying
no to the dishes, and sometimesthat means saying no to the
laundry or whatever it might be.
No, not right now, maybe later,but no, not right now is one of
my favorite tools.
For any mom If you've beenstruggling with juggling
everything when struggling forbalance, look at your list and
(11:11):
just analyze what can I say?
No, not right now too, and thenput it off.
Speaker 1 (11:18):
I love that so much.
I love that saying um no, notright now, because for me I get
really ants antsy about sayingno, because I don't want to miss
it.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
Right, it has nothing , it's very little to do with
the other person.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
I just don't want to not do something, and so not
right now means maybe one day,right.
So let me put it on a list.
I literally have a list that Icall parking lot is.
I have an idea that's not forright now.
It can go in there, but it'snot gone right.
So I like that.
No, not right now.
So it frees you in the momentso that your mind is clear, so
(11:51):
you can be focused, like you'resaying, and it also doesn't mean
everything you're thinking isfor never, right, right?
Yeah, I really liked the waythat you broke that down.
Everything about that waswonderful, and so how do you
know what to focus on?
Because we are being pulledfrom a million places.
So if you were going to sitdown with someone who is a young
(12:13):
mom and she's starting abusiness, either as a brand new
or it's in the very beginning,how do you, what do you tell her
?
What do I do?
Speaker 2 (12:22):
Well, that depends on where you want to go right,
it's the Cheshire Cat principle.
It's I don't know what you wantto focus on, unless you tell me
what you want to focus on.
And I remember being at aseminar.
I mean, you've probably been toyour fair share I'm a seminar
junkie, you can call it that.
But I remember being at aseminar and the facilitator said
you're going to get in apartnership, a dyad, and for
(12:44):
five minutes each of you isgoing to take a turn, so a 10
minute focus session, and you'regoing to take five minutes and
the other person in front of youis going to take five minutes
and everyone that's listening.
I encourage you to do this withyour partner, with your
business partner, with yourspouse, with yourself, with your
God in prayer just someonewhere you can bounce this idea
off of.
And our job was to talk aboutwhat we wanted for five minutes
(13:08):
straight.
We couldn't stop and wecouldn't end the timer early.
The first thing I noticed whenI was doing that is I really
didn't know until I was askedright, like I the easy answers
of I just want to be happy.
You can't say that for fiveminutes without coloring it in
Right.
And I watched my listen tomyself develop this idea.
(13:31):
I remember I was sitting thereand I was like, oh, you know
what I really want to do.
I want to create a retreatcenter for women and have it
have a equine modalities and arttherapies and talk therapies,
and I want a peach orchard inthe back with border collies
running the sheep, and I wantthere to be an aviary and I want
Spanish moss up on the drivewaywith a double-decker porch
(13:52):
wrapping all the way around itwith the French Southern
Louisiana ironwork.
That'd be so pretty.
And the more I talked about it,the more detailed it got.
And I surprised myself becauseI had never listened before to
what I actually wanted.
And when we really understandwhat is the destination, what is
the goal, what is the milestone, a lot of people shy away from
(14:15):
this right Because we're soafraid we won't get it.
We don't want to describe it indetail and I'm telling you that
is one of the biggest mistakesyou can make, because if you
don't know where you're going,you're going to be lost and
meandering.
And that's when we getourselves into trouble, that's
when we get distracted, that'swhen we forget what we're made
of, that's when we forget whosedaughters we are.
That's when we forget ourpotential and our possibilities
(14:36):
and our divine fibers of ourbeing, that we're actually made
from this ingredients that we'vebeen given, as women, to
multiply and create.
You give me half a human cellI'm gonna make a full human out
of it.
You give me a house, I'm gonnamake it a home.
We, as women, we are the greatmultipliers and we are always
multiplying.
But what are we multiplying?
And if we don't know, we'regonna be multiplying something.
(14:58):
That's not good.
It's a law of entropy, it'sbasic physics, guys.
So when I'm sitting down withthat mom and she's a new mom and
she has a business and she hasa passion, maybe she's thinking
of starting one I'm saying wheredo you want this to go?
What milestone do you want tosee?
What measurable?
Ok, I know you want to be happy.
We get that.
But what's going to make youhappy?
(15:18):
What?
How will you know when you'rehappy?
I was talking to one of mymembers just this last week.
I said how will you know whenyou're happy?
I was talking to one of mymembers just this last week.
I said how will you know whenyou're there?
She said I'll know I'm therewhen I've helped a hundred
thousand moms and I was like, oh, this is getting exciting, how
will you know that you've helpedthem?
She's like, well, I don't know.
I'm like that's the next thingto get clear on.
How will you know when you'rethere?
Because everything can bereverse engineered from that.
(15:39):
And what's cool about it isthis big goal.
I'll just take Susan's goal andI know that she's public with
this one, in case I say her name.
Her goal is to help 100,000moms know themselves better.
Now that we know that goal, wecan ask ourselves how can I
experience a measure of thattoday before I go to bed?
(16:00):
Just a measure of it, not thewhole thing, just a measure of
it.
Can I help one mom today?
Can I do this today?
And and that's that's worthgetting excited about I once
time, one time, did a ropescourse.
You know ropes course are meantto be like team building and all
this stuff, and I didn't have ateam.
I was freshly divorced, so itwas just for my team, for me.
So I went and I did this ropescourse and they had me climb to
(16:21):
the top of this telephone pole,scary as all get out, and I'm
standing there on top of this Idon't even know how high
telephone pole it was highenough to that where, like the
wind moved, you swayed with itand you're like I'm feeling like
I'm hula hooping on top of it.
This is really scary.
And of course they have you dosomething really scary On top of
that.
You have to jump and catch atrapeze that looks impossibly
(16:41):
far away.
But before you do, you got todecide why you're doing it and I
said to myself I was looking atthe beautiful view, trying to
distract myself from theprecipice of falling I said I
deserve to be excited aboutsomething every day.
Whether or not I catch thattrapeze, I deserve to be excited
about something every day andthis is how I know where you're
(17:04):
going.
And then, before you go to bed,do something that looks like
that.
That's what I would tell thatyoung mom is, is that you
deserve to be excited every day,Cause you're going to go
through hard.
We get that, but you deserve tobe excited every day.
Speaker 1 (17:19):
I think that's great advice.
I love that so much.
I'm in this mastermind groupand we ask each other what can I
do for you?
Which makes that person have toreally decide like, what is it
that I need and what can I asksomebody for?
So it makes this.
There's this vulnerabilityabout what you're talking about
which is, you know, I have todream big and be willing to tell
someone about it, right and so,and start making these
(17:41):
decisions and then also, on topof that, start asking for help
to get there.
I love that, yeah, so it'sbeautiful, I love it so much,
that's all wonderful.
So you have this saying which Ireally I, you know, I've never
(18:02):
heard, because it's yours and Ijust met you not that long ago.
I wrote it down a second ago.
I'll just read it off your bioman see, look, not prepared.
Speaker 2 (18:08):
Oh, you're a second ago.
Speaker 1 (18:08):
Um, I'll just read it off your bio man See, look not
prepared.
Oh, you're a good girl, Okay,so to make good people crazy
wealthy.
So what does that look like?
What do you, what do you do?
Speaker 2 (18:17):
So this is really fun .
Um, and I put the qualifier ofgood people on there because, I
mean, you and I both have enoughexperience in this world to
know that, first of all, moneyis neutral.
It's just a tool, just like ahammer.
It can be used to build ordestroy.
So I want good people to havethat money, because good people
are going to create foundations,they're going to put the money
where it needs to go, they'regoing to do service
(18:38):
opportunities.
They're going to use it to dothe good in the world that needs
to be done.
So I put the microphone up infront of someone whose message I
can't get behind, because Imean, we're all raising kids
here in this world, right, we'reall trying to figure this day
(18:58):
out.
None of us have ever done thisbefore, but we want the best
influence for our kids, becauseyou and I both know that it
doesn't take a village to raisea child, but your village will
raise your child.
So the more people that aregood people they don't I don't
even have to agree with them oneverything, but if they are
light, seeking, good doing,moral, ethical people, then
(19:19):
those people deserve to bewealthy so that they can spread
more of what I want to raise mychildren in.
They can spread more of what Iwant to raise my children in.
Not everyone deserves themicrophone.
Everyone can have a microphone.
I'm not going to limit freespeech or anything like that it
doesn't misunderstand me but Iam not willing to put the
microphone in front of people Idon't believe in.
So when I say make good peoplecrazy wealthy, I do that through
(19:41):
the power of stages.
I want as many good people toshare their messages on podcasts
, physical stages in their ownbusinesses on social media as I
possibly can, because we arehungry for it.
The world is hungry for it.
You might create an Instagrampost that maybe saves someone's
life and you'll never know, butyou need to be compensated for
that so that you can keep doingit.
(20:03):
People don't know this, butJesus's mission was funded.
It was funded.
How do you think he took threeyears off and just go traveling?
You know you've got to pay thepeople who run the boats.
You have to pay the peoplewhose restaurants you use.
All of that it deserves to befunded and that doesn't deserve
to be inhibitor.
My sister once said something tome.
She said never let money be thereason you don't do something.
(20:25):
And so I, my hope and my goalis to remove that barrier.
So I have a list on my phone ofa hundred people who've all
told me they want to make amillion dollars, and I have to
tell you that list is full ofpeople who are, who know what
they said yes to, and there aresome people on that list who
don't know what they said yes to.
It's like if I said how many ofyou want abs of steel, everyone
(20:45):
would raise their hands, right,but if I said how many of you
want to do a hundred crunchesfor a hundred days, not as many
people would raise their hand.
So it's a goal of mine, it's apassion of mine.
When we built the studio, weliterally wrote that with the
Sharpie on the studs of thisroom.
Because it is a passion and forthe right people, we get to
(21:07):
work together and I get to watchthem light up as those dreams
are realized.
And and for some people youknow they they come in and they
get what they need and theyleave, and that's okay, um, but
I just I want to leave a mark onthe planet that says, when I
get back to God, I can say, Imultiplied the talents that you
gave me and I did responsiblethings with the gifts you gave
(21:27):
me.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
That's beautiful, I love it.
So that's so much.
So you are offering everyone afree gift.
Can you talk about that?
It's the take your first stepstowards building your signature
presentation.
Speaker 2 (21:40):
Oh, and that's, that's a really beautiful thing.
On on my website I have alittle guidebook for turning
your story into a message ofimpact.
So if you go toMarianneHickmancom forward slash
free gift.
It's a little.
It's a very chewable, biteable12 pages of how to convert your
story into a message.
And this book isn't a magicwand.
It's not going to be the thingthat says poof you, now you're
an amazing speaker.
(22:00):
It's just a framework that thenyou can go out, use it,
practice it, get feedback andlearn how to do it so that when
you get the opportunity to havethe microphone in front of you.
Here's the thing I want everyoneto know Nobody cares about your
story.
I know that sounds mean, buthear me out.
Nobody cares about your story.
We tell our story, so itchanges someone else's story.
(22:24):
You're listening to this podcastbecause you want your life to
be better.
You're listening to thispodcast because you want your
life to be better.
You're listening to thispodcast for the same reason that
people go drink themselvescrazy drunk at a bar to enrich
their lives.
But you're doing somethingproductive with it.
You want to enrich your life ina really powerful way and when
you go and use your story tochange the lives of other people
for the better.
(22:45):
Now your story has meaningbehind it, now it can serve
somebody.
It's not a laundry list ofeverything that's gone wrong and
all your traumas in your lifethat's not interesting to
anybody.
Your audience, the people thatare waiting for you, literally
praying for you, to show up,they're begging.
They're begging God for you toget your stuff together so that
they can be helped, so that theycan be saved, and God's going
(23:06):
to use you to do his work.
Speaker 1 (23:08):
That is beautiful.
I love that, and so we willlink that gift in the
description of this video.
So if you had one like oneminute to tell this Christian
mom and your young kids anyadvice that you want to give her
, what would you tell her?
Speaker 2 (23:23):
Your voice matters, even if you don't think you have
one.
I've seen public speakers andeven comedians who are mute
deliver an amazing speech andmake people cry.
It's pretty incredible.
Your story matters because itcan change the lives of stories.
It can change the stories ofyour audience.
You matter as a mom.
When you're crying alone inyour closet at night, hang on
(23:43):
just a little bit longer.
When you're frustrated withyour business because you don't
know if it's going to besuccessful, if you don't know if
you're going to make it to nextmonth's water bill or next
month's rent, please know thatthe most powerful being at the
universe has your back, thatthere are people praying and
waiting for you and you arepaying the necessary price to be
(24:05):
the legitimate person, to bethe legitimate mentor, to be the
legitimate help who actuallycan help someone, because you
are going through the refiner'sfire that brings you closer to
representing the face of God.
Speaker 1 (24:18):
Awesome, wonderful.
Thank you so much, marianne.
I'm so glad that you joined ustoday.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
Thank you so much for having me.
I hope you guys have beenblessed by being here.
Speaker 1 (24:25):
Absolutely.
Welcome to the Peaceful Mompreneur.
We are flipping the script onbalance, because balance is a
myth.
Instead of chasing perfection,what if you started searching
for harmony?
We're going to talk all aboutcreating harmony with your
schedule, aligning your choiceswith your values and making
decisions with clarity andconfidence in your God-given
calling.
I'm excited to introduce you toMarianne Hickman.
(00:25):
She is an international publicspeaker and personal speaker
mentor who specializes ininspiring.
I can talk business owners andcoaches to monetize their
message through appearing onstages.
Marianne has been featured onover 2,400 worldwide stages
focusing on enriching andcultivating the development of
(00:48):
your story, message and revenue.
Her life's motto is to makegood people crazy wealthy.
Marianne was a single motherwho brought her family from food
stamps to multiple six-figureincome.
She is married to her bestfriend, richard Hickman, and
together they are raising sixchildren.
Marianne, thank you so much forjoining us.
(01:08):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
Elise In the pre-green room.
It's just like we were talkingabout it the energy matches.
I love what you are doing andwho you stand for For everyone
that's listening.
If you're not subscribing andfollowing, hit the button right
now because you want to be partof what this woman is building.
Thank you for having me on.
Speaker 1 (01:23):
Thank you so much.
That's so kind.
I appreciate that.
So like we're talking aboutright, where balance is not a
thing, it's you're just figuringout where you are in the season
that you're in Right, and so inyour bio it says you've spoken
at on twenty four hundred stages.
That is a lot.
How do you stay grounded andpresent while you're like doing
(01:44):
all of this career stuff andmanaging, you know, being a
mother to not just one, but likesix kids and you have a husband
and got all the things so like?
What does that look like foryou?
Speaker 2 (01:54):
Oh man, okay.
So, and I could go intopractical tools and all of the
how to's, and I think, first ofall, it's different for
everybody.
We have to decide for what ourown lives look like, what
success actually is Fordifferent moms, for different
women in general, success isgoing to look like different
things for you.
So you can't really tools aremeaningless if we don't know
(02:16):
where we're going or what we'reusing them for.
So the first tool, I guess, isto decide what success looks
like.
I really like to do thisactivity with people that I
mentor with, with students ofmine, with members of my
community, where we sit down andwe say what would be a perfect
day for you, and immediately thelimiting thoughts come up.
I'm like, shove those aside,you can pick them up later.
(02:37):
But what would a perfect day belike?
What time would you wake up?
Who would you wake up next to?
What would you eat forbreakfast?
What would be the first thingyou wanted to do?
On your calendar and every day,once we know where we're going,
we try to make little tweaksand adjustments to get closer to
that perfect day, right?
So in this, how do you keepthings crazy?
(03:02):
You know the schedule frombeing crazy.
It is crazy and it is hard.
It is challenging, challenging,and it's meant to be.
I I don't I don't know if I'm anauthority on perfection,
because I'm so far from that.
There's only one person that'saccomplished that and his name
is Jesus Christ, right, so therest of us are just trying to
figure it out.
And so the the how do you do acareer in business?
Well, you, you get good atsomething by sucking at it long
enough.
So the times where it was uglyand I know I still have those
(03:28):
times the goal is to say how didit get this ugly and what can I
do to contribute to more beautyand more harmony?
And a lot of the times thatmeans changing the approach but
staying determined on the goal.
That's why I want to know whereI'm going.
That's why I want to know whata perfect, successful day looks
like, because then I'm going tochange my approach on how to get
there.
I might have to zigzag a littlebit, you know, and it is
(03:49):
involved, especially recently,saying no to a lot of travel,
which I love to do.
So that's really hard, but itdoesn't support, you know,
raising a toddler right now, andthat's that's the main question
is what supports?
How does my motherhood supportmy passion, which is what I
chose to do for work, and howdoes that support Marianne being
(04:09):
Marianne, and how does thatsupport everything else?
So it's kind of like theopposite of rock paper scissors
where something kills somethingelse, it's.
It's how does something upliftsomething else?
And in any time it doesn'thappen.
That means I'm out of harmonyand I need to adjust the
schedule for next time.
One of the phrases that I havereally come to adopt I heard it
(04:31):
just a couple of weeks ago, butthis is a phrase that has
brought me so much peace overthe last couple of weeks
especially is increase yourtolerance for mistakes.
Increase your tolerance formistakes that you make, increase
your tolerance for mistakesthat other people make, because
that's, that's the mental gym,that's where we're getting
stronger, that's where we'regetting better.
So I mean it's.
(04:51):
I don't know if that answersyour question specifically or
not, but I'm by no means perfectat this, but do I have a lot of
experience in it?
Oh yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Yeah, absolutely, and I love that, because the thing
is, we never arrive at you knowwhatever.
That is right.
Every time we learn something,there's something new to learn.
Every time we know more aboutGod, there's more to know
something about parenting,there's something else that you
got to learn.
Your kids change, and so I loveeverything that you're saying
and, yes, I think you answeredthat.
It's basically it's it is.
It depends on who you are andwhere you are and where you want
(05:23):
to go.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
And.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
I know that's not the answer that everybody wants,
but it's the truth.
Like there's no cookie cutter,there's no like.
Here's the model do this thing,you'll be happy, not a not
thing.
So one of the things that youdid say was that you have to say
no to things, and obviouslyright now you're not traveling
as much because you havetoddlers, and so how do you
determine what is good and whatis not necessarily bad, just not
(05:47):
good for you?
Speaker 2 (05:48):
Well, that's a good question, because the power of
choice is the most powerfulthing that we have.
And you're right.
And the choice is not alwayseasy, because if it were
choosing between bad and good,the choice would be very easy.
We would always choose the goodthing, but more often than not,
we're choosing between good andbetter, and absolutely best
(06:10):
it's.
That's when it gets hard,because there's all of these
good things are in front of usand one is going to be good and
sue this for a little while, butone thing is like the best
thing for us, and how do we knowand understand the difference?
This principle is a principlethat marketers use.
It's a principle thatsalespeople use.
It's a principle thatfulfillment teams use.
It's a principle that companiesuse and it's a principle that
(06:31):
influencers use.
It's very common.
It's probably going to annoy alot of people when I say it, but
it's niching down and here'swhat I mean by that.
I know I've already lost somepeople by saying that because we
are so sick of this phrase,right, but I think about it in
terms of like a magnifying glass.
I don't know if you've ever hadlike a magnifying glass in your
hand right, and if you're likeme.
You go out on the sidewalk andsee what you do with the light
(06:53):
and how you can bend and warpthe light and how you can make a
spotlight out of it or you canmake a little pinpoint of light
out of it that actually you knowyou can burn the weeds in
between the cracks in thesidewalks and stuff like that.
Focus is so powerful.
I think the enemy's biggesttool against us is not evil,
it's distraction, because that'swhen he can get most of us is
(07:13):
this distraction, and it'sdistraction with the good that
keeps us from the best.
And so when I was firstlearning about this, it was when
I was actually doingphotography.
I studied photography in college, had a business before I went
to college, and when I firststarted doing photography, I
would say yes to every photoshoot possible, because I didn't
(07:33):
know this, but I didn't knowwhat I wanted to do.
So I said yes to the familyshoots.
I said yes to the travelingphotography.
I said yes to newbornphotography.
I said yes to puppy photography.
I said yes to maternity andgraduation and and prom and and
anyone that needed a photo.
I said yes to it.
Weddings, you name it.
And I remember my firstwindfall.
(07:55):
I was like I had the bestproblem Any business owner wants
of having too many clients andnot enough fulfillment.
It was a struggle because, man,I remember I had, I was driving
down I-15.
A lot of thinking happens in mycar.
I don't know about you, butthat's where, like I chew on
stuff right Driving down I-15,and uh, this I'm talking to God
(08:16):
Cause he's, he sits co-pilotlots of times and I was like,
listen, I have so much to do.
I have three photo shootsbacked up overdue on my computer
.
The clients are starting to bugme.
They're late.
I'm.
I have two shoots today.
I'm getting backed up on themand one of them is a wedding,
which means really high pressure.
I only get one day to do thisright, because we don't get to
(08:36):
redo the wedding if the memorycard fails or if the batteries
die or if something malfunctions.
It's very high pressure.
Usually, everyone else isfeeling that high pressure of
the wedding.
We've got mom's ill as bride'sill as groom's ill as the
screaming toddlers Right and wehave to make it perfect.
And so all this high pressurecame in and in this conversation
I'm praying for help to getthese shoots out the door.
(08:57):
I'm praying for help to be ajovial person on these, these
productions, and I'm sittingdown.
At the end of that day after all, my prayers went up and I got
all the feedback and this iswhat God told me.
He said you're allowed to sayno.
There's this abundance of chaoswhen we say yes to too many
things.
And God said guess what?
(09:20):
You are allowed to pick andchoose what you want to do.
So I started saying no toweddings, even though I was
really good at it.
I started saying no to weddingsbecause I didn't have fun.
And then I started saying no topet photography because that'd
be crazy.
And then I started saying no tonewborn photography because
they're crazy too.
They're just as crazy as thepuppies.
And then I started saying no tothe large family shoots with 50
(09:42):
people because it wasn't funfor me.
And I really started honing in.
I only said yes to couplestravel photography and that was
so fun, it was so fulfilling andit was so relieving to say no
to everything else and be ableto say, no, that's not what I do
, that's what somebody else says.
I can refer you if you want,but no, that's not what I do.
(10:04):
And that laser focus, just likewe get with the magnifying
glass.
That magnifying glass, thatbeam of light, is so much more
potent and powerful when it isfocused on one thing, and I've
learned it in my photographybusiness and I'm continually
relearning this lesson over andover and over again with my kids
, with my parenting, with thedifferent seasons of life that
(10:25):
we go through what's the focusright now?
What's the focus right now, andas long as I know the focus
right now, oh my gosh, what arelief it is to say no, that's
not for me right now.
No, not right now.
That is one of the mostpowerful phrases.
I learned it from my friend,hope Zavara.
She's one of my favorite people.
When I heard her say that, Iwas like, oh, that huge sigh of
(10:50):
relief and the burden just felloff.
I get to say no, not right now,and sometimes that means saying
no to the dishes, and sometimesthat means saying no to the
laundry or whatever it might be.
No, not right now, maybe later,but no, not right now is one of
my favorite tools.
For any mom If you've beenstruggling with juggling
everything when struggling forbalance, look at your list and
(11:11):
just analyze what can I say?
No, not right now too, and thenput it off.
Speaker 1 (11:18):
I love that so much.
I love that saying um no, notright now, because for me I get
really ants antsy about sayingno, because I don't want to miss
it.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
Right, it has nothing , it's very little to do with
the other person.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
I just don't want to not do something, and so not
right now means maybe one day,right.
So let me put it on a list.
I literally have a list that Icall parking lot is.
I have an idea that's not forright now.
It can go in there, but it'snot gone right.
So I like that.
No, not right now.
So it frees you in the momentso that your mind is clear, so
(11:51):
you can be focused, like you'resaying, and it also doesn't mean
everything you're thinking isfor never, right, right?
Yeah, I really liked the waythat you broke that down.
Everything about that waswonderful, and so how do you
know what to focus on?
Because we are being pulledfrom a million places.
So if you were going to sitdown with someone who is a young
(12:13):
mom and she's starting abusiness, either as a brand new
or it's in the very beginning,how do you, what do you tell her
?
What do I do?
Speaker 2 (12:22):
Well, that depends on where you want to go right,
it's the Cheshire Cat principle.
It's I don't know what you wantto focus on, unless you tell me
what you want to focus on.
And I remember being at aseminar.
I mean, you've probably been toyour fair share I'm a seminar
junkie, you can call it that.
But I remember being at aseminar and the facilitator said
you're going to get in apartnership, a dyad, and for
(12:44):
five minutes each of you isgoing to take a turn, so a 10
minute focus session, and you'regoing to take five minutes and
the other person in front of youis going to take five minutes
and everyone that's listening.
I encourage you to do this withyour partner, with your
business partner, with yourspouse, with yourself, with your
God in prayer just someonewhere you can bounce this idea
off of.
And our job was to talk aboutwhat we wanted for five minutes
(13:08):
straight.
We couldn't stop and wecouldn't end the timer early.
The first thing I noticed whenI was doing that is I really
didn't know until I was askedright, like I the easy answers
of I just want to be happy.
You can't say that for fiveminutes without coloring it in
Right.
And I watched my listen tomyself develop this idea.
(13:31):
I remember I was sitting thereand I was like, oh, you know
what I really want to do.
I want to create a retreatcenter for women and have it
have a equine modalities and arttherapies and talk therapies,
and I want a peach orchard inthe back with border collies
running the sheep, and I wantthere to be an aviary and I want
Spanish moss up on the drivewaywith a double-decker porch
(13:52):
wrapping all the way around itwith the French Southern
Louisiana ironwork.
That'd be so pretty.
And the more I talked about it,the more detailed it got.
And I surprised myself becauseI had never listened before to
what I actually wanted.
And when we really understandwhat is the destination, what is
the goal, what is the milestone, a lot of people shy away from
(14:15):
this right Because we're soafraid we won't get it.
We don't want to describe it indetail and I'm telling you that
is one of the biggest mistakesyou can make, because if you
don't know where you're going,you're going to be lost and
meandering.
And that's when we getourselves into trouble, that's
when we get distracted, that'swhen we forget what we're made
of, that's when we forget whosedaughters we are.
That's when we forget ourpotential and our possibilities
(14:36):
and our divine fibers of ourbeing, that we're actually made
from this ingredients that we'vebeen given, as women, to
multiply and create.
You give me half a human cellI'm gonna make a full human out
of it.
You give me a house, I'm gonnamake it a home.
We, as women, we are the greatmultipliers and we are always
multiplying.
But what are we multiplying?
And if we don't know, we'regonna be multiplying something.
(14:58):
That's not good.
It's a law of entropy, it'sbasic physics, guys.
So when I'm sitting down withthat mom and she's a new mom and
she has a business and she hasa passion, maybe she's thinking
of starting one I'm saying wheredo you want this to go?
What milestone do you want tosee?
What measurable?
Ok, I know you want to be happy.
We get that.
But what's going to make youhappy?
(15:18):
What?
How will you know when you'rehappy?
I was talking to one of mymembers just this last week.
I said how will you know whenyou're happy?
I was talking to one of mymembers just this last week.
I said how will you know whenyou're there?
She said I'll know I'm therewhen I've helped a hundred
thousand moms and I was like, oh, this is getting exciting, how
will you know that you've helpedthem?
She's like, well, I don't know.
I'm like that's the next thingto get clear on.
How will you know when you'rethere?
Because everything can bereverse engineered from that.
(15:39):
And what's cool about it isthis big goal.
I'll just take Susan's goal andI know that she's public with
this one, in case I say her name.
Her goal is to help 100,000moms know themselves better.
Now that we know that goal, wecan ask ourselves how can I
experience a measure of thattoday before I go to bed?
(16:00):
Just a measure of it, not thewhole thing, just a measure of
it.
Can I help one mom today?
Can I do this today?
And and that's that's worthgetting excited about I once
time, one time, did a ropescourse.
You know ropes course are meantto be like team building and all
this stuff, and I didn't have ateam.
I was freshly divorced, so itwas just for my team, for me.
So I went and I did this ropescourse and they had me climb to
(16:21):
the top of this telephone pole,scary as all get out, and I'm
standing there on top of this Idon't even know how high
telephone pole it was highenough to that where, like the
wind moved, you swayed with itand you're like I'm feeling like
I'm hula hooping on top of it.
This is really scary.
And of course they have you dosomething really scary On top of
that.
You have to jump and catch atrapeze that looks impossibly
(16:41):
far away.
But before you do, you got todecide why you're doing it and I
said to myself I was looking atthe beautiful view, trying to
distract myself from theprecipice of falling I said I
deserve to be excited aboutsomething every day.
Whether or not I catch thattrapeze, I deserve to be excited
about something every day andthis is how I know where you're
(17:04):
going.
And then, before you go to bed,do something that looks like
that.
That's what I would tell thatyoung mom is, is that you
deserve to be excited every day,Cause you're going to go
through hard.
We get that, but you deserve tobe excited every day.
Speaker 1 (17:19):
I think that's great advice.
I love that so much.
I'm in this mastermind groupand we ask each other what can I
do for you?
Which makes that person have toreally decide like, what is it
that I need and what can I asksomebody for?
So it makes this.
There's this vulnerabilityabout what you're talking about
which is, you know, I have todream big and be willing to tell
someone about it, right and so,and start making these
(17:41):
decisions and then also, on topof that, start asking for help
to get there.
I love that, yeah, so it'sbeautiful, I love it so much,
that's all wonderful.
So you have this saying which Ireally I, you know, I've never
(18:02):
heard, because it's yours and Ijust met you not that long ago.
I wrote it down a second ago.
I'll just read it off your bioman see, look, not prepared.
Speaker 2 (18:08):
Oh, you're a second ago.
Speaker 1 (18:08):
Um, I'll just read it off your bio man See, look not
prepared.
Oh, you're a good girl, Okay,so to make good people crazy
wealthy.
So what does that look like?
What do you, what do you do?
Speaker 2 (18:17):
So this is really fun .
Um, and I put the qualifier ofgood people on there because, I
mean, you and I both have enoughexperience in this world to
know that, first of all, moneyis neutral.
It's just a tool, just like ahammer.
It can be used to build ordestroy.
So I want good people to havethat money, because good people
are going to create foundations,they're going to put the money
where it needs to go, they'regoing to do service
(18:38):
opportunities.
They're going to use it to dothe good in the world that needs
to be done.
So I put the microphone up infront of someone whose message I
can't get behind, because Imean, we're all raising kids
here in this world, right, we'reall trying to figure this day
(18:58):
out.
None of us have ever done thisbefore, but we want the best
influence for our kids, becauseyou and I both know that it
doesn't take a village to raisea child, but your village will
raise your child.
So the more people that aregood people they don't I don't
even have to agree with them oneverything, but if they are
light, seeking, good doing,moral, ethical people, then
(19:19):
those people deserve to bewealthy so that they can spread
more of what I want to raise mychildren in.
They can spread more of what Iwant to raise my children in.
Not everyone deserves themicrophone.
Everyone can have a microphone.
I'm not going to limit freespeech or anything like that it
doesn't misunderstand me but Iam not willing to put the
microphone in front of people Idon't believe in.
So when I say make good peoplecrazy wealthy, I do that through
(19:41):
the power of stages.
I want as many good people toshare their messages on podcasts
, physical stages in their ownbusinesses on social media as I
possibly can, because we arehungry for it.
The world is hungry for it.
You might create an Instagrampost that maybe saves someone's
life and you'll never know, butyou need to be compensated for
that so that you can keep doingit.
(20:03):
People don't know this, butJesus's mission was funded.
It was funded.
How do you think he took threeyears off and just go traveling?
You know you've got to pay thepeople who run the boats.
You have to pay the peoplewhose restaurants you use.
All of that it deserves to befunded and that doesn't deserve
to be inhibitor.
My sister once said something tome.
She said never let money be thereason you don't do something.
(20:25):
And so I, my hope and my goalis to remove that barrier.
So I have a list on my phone ofa hundred people who've all
told me they want to make amillion dollars, and I have to
tell you that list is full ofpeople who are, who know what
they said yes to, and there aresome people on that list who
don't know what they said yes to.
It's like if I said how many ofyou want abs of steel, everyone
(20:45):
would raise their hands, right,but if I said how many of you
want to do a hundred crunchesfor a hundred days, not as many
people would raise their hand.
So it's a goal of mine, it's apassion of mine.
When we built the studio, weliterally wrote that with the
Sharpie on the studs of thisroom.
Because it is a passion and forthe right people, we get to
(21:07):
work together and I get to watchthem light up as those dreams
are realized.
And and for some people youknow they they come in and they
get what they need and theyleave, and that's okay, um, but
I just I want to leave a mark onthe planet that says, when I
get back to God, I can say, Imultiplied the talents that you
gave me and I did responsiblethings with the gifts you gave
(21:27):
me.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
That's beautiful, I love it.
So that's so much.
So you are offering everyone afree gift.
Can you talk about that?
It's the take your first stepstowards building your signature
presentation.
Speaker 2 (21:40):
Oh, and that's, that's a really beautiful thing.
On on my website I have alittle guidebook for turning
your story into a message ofimpact.
So if you go toMarianneHickmancom forward slash
free gift.
It's a little.
It's a very chewable, biteable12 pages of how to convert your
story into a message.
And this book isn't a magicwand.
It's not going to be the thingthat says poof you, now you're
an amazing speaker.
(22:00):
It's just a framework that thenyou can go out, use it,
practice it, get feedback andlearn how to do it so that when
you get the opportunity to havethe microphone in front of you.
Here's the thing I want everyoneto know Nobody cares about your
story.
I know that sounds mean, buthear me out.
Nobody cares about your story.
We tell our story, so itchanges someone else's story.
(22:24):
You're listening to this podcastbecause you want your life to
be better.
You're listening to thispodcast because you want your
life to be better.
You're listening to thispodcast for the same reason that
people go drink themselvescrazy drunk at a bar to enrich
their lives.
But you're doing somethingproductive with it.
You want to enrich your life ina really powerful way and when
you go and use your story tochange the lives of other people
for the better.
(22:45):
Now your story has meaningbehind it, now it can serve
somebody.
It's not a laundry list ofeverything that's gone wrong and
all your traumas in your lifethat's not interesting to
anybody.
Your audience, the people thatare waiting for you, literally
praying for you, to show up,they're begging.
They're begging God for you toget your stuff together so that
they can be helped, so that theycan be saved, and God's going
(23:06):
to use you to do his work.
Speaker 1 (23:08):
That is beautiful.
I love that, and so we willlink that gift in the
description of this video.
So if you had one like oneminute to tell this Christian
mom and your young kids anyadvice that you want to give her
, what would you tell her?
Speaker 2 (23:23):
Your voice matters, even if you don't think you have
one.
I've seen public speakers andeven comedians who are mute
deliver an amazing speech andmake people cry.
It's pretty incredible.
Your story matters because itcan change the lives of stories.
It can change the stories ofyour audience.
You matter as a mom.
When you're crying alone inyour closet at night, hang on
(23:43):
just a little bit longer.
When you're frustrated withyour business because you don't
know if it's going to besuccessful, if you don't know if
you're going to make it to nextmonth's water bill or next
month's rent, please know thatthe most powerful being at the
universe has your back, thatthere are people praying and
waiting for you and you arepaying the necessary price to be
(24:05):
the legitimate person, to bethe legitimate mentor, to be the
legitimate help who actuallycan help someone, because you
are going through the refiner'sfire that brings you closer to
representing the face of God.
Speaker 1 (24:18):
Awesome, wonderful.
Thank you so much, marianne.
I'm so glad that you joined ustoday.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
Thank you so much for having me.
I hope you guys have beenblessed by being here.
Speaker 1 (24:25):
Absolutely.
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