Are we getting too self-focused in marriage? In this episode, we unpack the cultural messages that push hyper-individualism (“fill your cup first”) and show why great marriages are actually built on mutual care, not solo self-care. We talk about healthy vs. overcorrected boundaries, why prosocial actions (doing good for your partner) boost your own mood, how to shift from short-term impulses to a long-term family vision, and practical ways to “out-love” each other in daily life.
What you’ll learn from this episode:
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Explore all our resources (Couples Workshop, 30-Day Challenges, guides & more): meetthefreemans.com/links
Episode Timestamps of What We Discussed:
0:00 Love is a commitment (not just a feeling)
1:15 Intro & topic: Are spouses becoming too selfish?
2:41 The myth of “self first,” then the relationship
5:38 Mutual care over self-care (why you can’t get to 100% alone)
9:31 Study: prosocial acts boost mood & connection
11:48 Boundaries: healthy vs the overcorrection
14:05 F1 analogy — from beginner rules to mastery standards
17:47 Culture: hyper-individualism & consumerism in relationships
20:54 Shift to long-term vision (let the future guide today)
22:30 Family values & the erosion of the family-oriented model
28:24 Why media rarely tells you what truly strengthens marriage
30:01 Interdependence & “out-loving” each other
31:25 Choosing your partner’s needs: practical examples
32:46 Main takeaways & reminders
33:38 Love = commitment + shared vision
34:54 Closing: reviews, subscribe
35:12 Resources & sign-off
My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark
My Favorite Murder is a true crime comedy podcast hosted by Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark. Each week, Karen and Georgia share compelling true crimes and hometown stories from friends and listeners. Since MFM launched in January of 2016, Karen and Georgia have shared their lifelong interest in true crime and have covered stories of infamous serial killers like the Night Stalker, mysterious cold cases, captivating cults, incredible survivor stories and important events from history like the Tulsa race massacre of 1921. My Favorite Murder is part of the Exactly Right podcast network that provides a platform for bold, creative voices to bring to life provocative, entertaining and relatable stories for audiences everywhere. The Exactly Right roster of podcasts covers a variety of topics including historic true crime, comedic interviews and news, science, pop culture and more. Podcasts on the network include Buried Bones with Kate Winkler Dawson and Paul Holes, That's Messed Up: An SVU Podcast, This Podcast Will Kill You, Bananas and more.
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