Michael Ray (@michaelraymusic) sits down with Bobby Bones to give a candid look on his public divorce and how he's grown personally and professionally from it. He'll share what he learned from it and what he wishes he had done differently. He gets vulnerable talking about the steps he took in therapy and how while he was going through that process he had the number one song on country radio. Michael will also share how he was diagnosed with depression and the healthy steps he's taking in his every day life to get better. He'll also talk about his new music, what it's like being on tour and why he feels like he's back in 2019 again.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:06):
I can't speak for her, but I think for me
it was like I wouldn't have been so influenced by
the fans being involved in it. And to be honest,
I think I knew in the beginning or around that time,
that this was something we probably should have slowed down.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
This is episode four hundred and seven with Michael Ray.
He walked in and he just looked like a wrestler,
professional wrestler. He did massive and Michael Ray has always
been a guy in shape. But I think we start
talking about that immediately. I think people are like, how
do you start these shows? Like what do you talk about?
It's the first thing that I think of when I
see them, and it usually goes from there. And I
got places that I'll maybe go where I never go though.
(00:44):
Is the Ray bus thing?
Speaker 1 (00:45):
Yeah, it's true.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
We got so on and I was going to ask
him about standing Ray up at the bus, and I
think people are going to hear it in this We
got so onto something that was so opposite that it
just felt weird to kind of crash that and start
over there. I feel like you were very strategic in
this interview. I didn't want him to feel uncomfortable because
I wasn't going to go poking after the ex wife
(01:06):
stuff unless he kind of, you know, stuck his head
out of the groundhog out of the hole a little
and be like, hey, I'm willing to talk about it
a little bit. I never want to push anybody into
a place where they're not comfortable. And we danced there
a little bit early in the interview. We got out
and I said, Okay, he's pretty, he's good, and I
didn't want him to say anything that he wouldn't I
(01:28):
don't want to say be proud of saying, but anything
he would regret saying.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:31):
So I was kind of feeling him out there, like
he's not too emotional about it, he's controlled. And so
then we go back to it. We go back to
that well later on. I don't think it's the biggest
takeaway from this, and maybe the most clicks from this,
but I think the biggest takeaway is a guy who
is just trying to be a better person, is trying
to live healthier, had some crap go down, some people die,
(01:54):
a divorce, and he was forcibly help told to get
healthier by himself. I mean, he put himself through it,
so you know, big growth. I think that's the takeaway
here is big growth. But Michael Ray I have not
really spent much time with Mike Corey. We allude to
it in the beginning here. The last time I saw him,
we did a couple operate things together. One of them
(02:14):
was on stage, I remember what he brought up, and
then one of them was we played the opry at
the same time and we were just backstage in the
dressing rooms together. I don't know they even remember that
one he was talking about. The one on stage. I
gave him a plaque. I was just part of the
TV show, and if I'm on camera, I don't even remember.
That's not even real life. So I had to go
back and look at see the picture he was talking about.
But I will say after this, I like the guy.
(02:37):
He's a really nice guy. I liked the guy, and
I think early on I would just see all the
tattoos and I would go, you know, he's sleeved up.
Probably not a guy that I'd like to hang out with.
It's like an ultimate fighter, a guy unfair. I think
I signed some unfair things to him based on that.
But he's always been super nice and had a great
time and then he hung out afterward and we just talked.
(03:00):
Eddie and I were about to work out afterward, me
and him and Klug and Michael. We had just hung
out with like twenty minutes. We worked out and just
you know, talked and I don't know, I liked the guy,
not that I didn't like him, I just didn't know. Yeah,
I was like sleep with one eye open. And then
he you know, Ditsch Ray that time, which we never
got to. So Michael Ray here, follow him at Michael
Ray Music at Michael Ray Official. Can we play a
(03:21):
couple songs this Yeah, he's got this new song called
Spirits and Demons with Meghan Patrick, Spirits and Mombing. He
may at the bottom some songs you may know, think
a little less at number one from March of twenty seventeen,
Bundlings sing in twenty nineteen a number one with one
(03:45):
that Got Away.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
That's all rap, that's okay, She's going to be one
hell of a one that got Away.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
And then last year, which he talked about here, in
twenty twenty two, he had Whiskey and Rain for multip
multiple weeks. Yeah, come in all right, Michael Ray from
Eustas Florida, thirty five years old. He was inspired by
his grandfather, who played music for him, taught him how
to play guitar, and had him perform at Assistant Living centers.
(04:13):
It was very close to his grandfather. That's, you know,
part of the reason he loves the opry so much.
He's played the opry over seventy times. He assigned to
Warner Brothers in Nashville. He's currently on tour till the
end of October, and he has a new EP called
Dive Bars and Broken Hearts that came out on June
twenty third. Here is Michael Ray. Good to see you, man,
you too, Man, I was talking to these guys. I
(04:34):
guess I haven't seen you since backstage is the opry
rhyman opry? Maybe pre pandemic?
Speaker 1 (04:44):
Yeah, it was when actually you gave me my first
platinum plaque that day.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
You know what, Maybe that wasn't I.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
Think it was a regular the opera, the opera. Yeah,
I think that was the last time which has been
a yeah you look jacked, thanks hard? Yeah? Yeah, man,
you know me and out rabble. I was always like
trying to be lean and then like I was like, man,
I want to put some size on, and during the
end of the pandemic, I was like, screwed. We don't
got photo shoots or anything going on. So you can
(05:12):
pack on some weight if you want.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
So.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
Uh now I'm trying to lean back down. I feel
like I got but pack on.
Speaker 2 (05:17):
Way that looks fair because you look jacked. There's a
difference in if I eat a bunch of sugar and
have a crazy water retention and like, so, what what's
the routine? What's the beef up routine?
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Man? I've been I started doing this carnivore diet where
it's pretty much like it's kind of like Keto but
not as like strip. But it's all meat. Uh, all meat,
all meat, Like yeah, like I eat a bunch of steak,
bunch of chicken, bunch of you know, any any any meat, eggs, fruit,
a bunch of my buddies in the UFC. They they
(05:51):
got on and they said they started feeling really good.
And it's so hard me. You know how it is
on the road to try to eat healthy.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
And it's impossible.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
It's impossible, and so at least then it's like, you know,
I don't eat fast food. I try not to. But
if I do have to at least there's something there
I just eat, like the meat.
Speaker 2 (06:05):
It's so hard to not live a regular life but
have regular habits.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
So, and it gets really bad for me when I'm
traveling a lot, if I'm doing a TV show or touring,
because if I'm here and I'm working Monday through Friday
and I'm getting up at this time, I'm going to
bed at this time, and I'm working out everything i
can then do just straight habitual I can commit it's habitual.
But man, you start staying up late or not knowing
(06:32):
where food or not having access to and you're hungry. Yeah,
and you're like, it's just gonna be the bag of
free does it's it?
Speaker 1 (06:38):
But you just got you got to go down and
grocery shop at the little convenient part of the hotel.
We were just in a place some similar thing. Maybe
it was this tiny town and I've been shooting a
TV a second season for Inside the Base on the
Circle Network, and so we're in this little town shooting
stuff with the Coastguard and like there is no uber,
there is no food around there. It's like mom and
pop and it shuts down at seven. It's just a wholesome,
(07:01):
all American little town, you know. So you get there,
you're like, well, I guess it's the chips that we're
doing tonight, you know, So it's all there can Yeah,
that's it.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
And it's also like, you know, growing up how I
grew up, you know, and most people where I come
from are obese or just not healthy because we didn't
have the education of what good food was and everybody
was poor. So to get to eat clan healthy is
kind of a rich person thing, Dude.
Speaker 1 (07:25):
I just said this the other day. My friends of
mine down home, man that that work, you know, bust
their butt, man, and they're the souls provider because the
mom stays at home because it's cheaper for them to
stay at home than it is for them to have daycare. Right,
And man, I got to think about this, I go,
the reason why we have I think some of the
weight issues we have is because you know, I come
from a small town of Florida. It's the same thing, man,
you feed the kid. The kids got to eat, you know,
(07:47):
so feed ten piece a Kentucky fried chicken and so
instead and now it's fourteen dollars for three pieces of chicken. Breasts,
or it's ten dollars for ten pizzas, well, what are
you going to do if you're on? You know, you
got no choice? And uh, and I've told him, I go,
I don't know how people do it. Man, Just for me,
it's two hundred dollars to fifty three hundred dollars just
for me if I'm home for a week.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
Do you go gro This is funny because listen, except
for stopping at a gas station to buy groceries, I
went from being having absolutely no money to having a
lot of money in a relatively quick span where I
didn't have the education to learn about money. So I
went from not knowing about money at all because it's
(08:26):
never around it too, then not knowing at all because
I had to have people helped me with it because
I did have I'm having to pay percentages of people,
and I got agents and managers and I got and
so I was like, oh my god, I don't want
to do it wrong, so please, so I have to.
So my money education kind of came and went quickly.
With that being said, I would like go grocer shopping
at the gas station when I was had no money,
and then when I had all the money. Until recently
(08:47):
my wife has said, Okay, we're going to the grocery store,
and so I go to the grocery store. I'm it's
weird how much groceries cost. And that's a weird thing
to say because I'm so disconnected in that way. And
I was single until I was thirty seven years old.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
Right, yeah, so you're just eating whatever you want, whatever.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
I want, grab go to the I would just literally
any milk, go to the gas station. I get one
thing at a time. That's how it exactly what we do.
And I was gone so much or I would uber
eats it. So until I've only had to start learning
like the real life, like normal human connection. Grocery store stuff. Dude,
it's crazy. After you have a grocery store's stupid.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
It's insane. Bro it just you go to now and.
Speaker 2 (09:23):
To go to Whole Foods.
Speaker 1 (09:24):
Oh yeah, Whole Foods. That's a big flex. Yeah, Whole
Foods is you're you're spending two hundred dollars, you walk
out with nothing's more depressing than you spend the two
hundred dollars and you walk out with like.
Speaker 2 (09:32):
Two bags And I'm not here thing I can't affore.
I want people to be like, oh, listen to Bobby
Waring with no, no, no, I just had no idea. Yeah, dude,
I'm with you, man, I would suck at prices right
right about those games like how much? How much is it?
Speaker 1 (09:43):
Come all down?
Speaker 2 (09:44):
Pine sol and a box is a Hamburger? But about
seventy three dollars?
Speaker 1 (09:48):
Bot?
Speaker 2 (09:48):
You know, two dollars one hundred and fifty.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
I don't know what it is.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
So do you do your own grocery shopping?
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Yeah, whenever I'm home, because I'm only home for a
few days, and so I got a trigger out there
and that's been like something that's really like broad. I
just love it. Man. I've cooked some stuff and like
give it to neighbors and stuff. So it's kind of
like a I don't know, kind of get away, you know.
I go pick up the meat and stuff and I
just grill out at the house for a few days.
So so, like I said, many we're always on the road.
(10:13):
We travel with the grill and stuff, and I try
to grill out there and eat as healthy as a camp.
Like we said, it's tough. So when I'm home, I'm
tried it. It's like a it's like a spa retreat.
When I am home, it's like getting the sauna, split
everything out, and.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
Do you cook you like a sauna?
Speaker 1 (10:27):
Yeah? Yeah, I got an infrared at the house. You know.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
We were just talking about having one of those. My
wife was like, she she will go somewhere with those,
an infrared sauna, and she believes in it. And I
guess I just don't. I guess I haven't spent the
time educating myself on the difference of what an infrared
versus just a hot sauna is. Why do you do it?
Speaker 1 (10:48):
For me? What I found well, so it's it he's
from like the inside, you know, and so there's a
bunch of like of your body or that machine of
the machine. So it's like it's not like a steamer,
you know. And so it's like you're sitting there and
it's slowly you start feeling get hot. And man, dude,
mine's like half the size of the couch that Mike's
sitting on. It's in my garage and you just plug
it in. Man. And what I what I have found
out though, is if you do it consistently for a
(11:10):
few days, you start feeling I start feeling just less
kind of anxious, you know. And I do the cold, cold,
bad thing, and I take cold showers.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
Cold plunch in the morning or just at any time
in the morning. So the one thing that I've been
doing a little bit is my friend and he's also
if I get sick, I call outam.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
Bobo, Oh yeah, bobo yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:30):
So he has irrita. And I've been learning a bit
about inflammation within the body, inside the body, especially with
injuries and walk come to a hell of Well podcast
with Bobby and Michael by the way, but he has
a cryo.
Speaker 1 (11:44):
Oh man, those are awesome.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
And I swear to god, I do it for a
couple of days in a row, and I just feel
better in my joints, even if it's a placebo.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
I wonder how much some stuff of that is. Probably some, I.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
Mean really probably some. But I tell you, after a
couple of days, I really do feel better in my
because of And you get in and it's three and
a half minutes, and you know, you turn on any
song you want, but I actually turn on Bullson Parade.
I do that to get a machine because it's so
freaking cold it is, so I'm just in my underwear
it's like ice blowing on you. That song exactly three
minutes and bull and you know I'm in. I'm focused.
(12:17):
I finish your cold. Your nipples about to break off.
Speaker 1 (12:19):
That's what I was about to say. I feel like
they're like icicles about to just fall off your chest.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
Now that the cryo I get and I love the
infra red, I guess I just haven't.
Speaker 1 (12:27):
Yeah, I think try it. Man tried it a few
days in a row. What I feel the most out
of it is mentally, like I feel more clarity. Yeah,
when I do it in a so I'll wake up
do like fastic cardio all got bow flex bike is
like a peloton that they have. So I do that
and then hop in the sauna for thirty minutes and
then go take a cold shower.
Speaker 2 (12:47):
Did you find yourself like you needed to get on
some sort of mental health physical wellness journey after all
the crap that you've kind of been a part of
the last couple of years, or is this is general
something you've been in for the last six seven years.
Speaker 1 (13:01):
No, it was definitely after that time. After all that
during too, you know, I think I just really leaned
on a lot of people that were, you know, trying
to make healthier choices and healthier habits out of that situation,
and I just really started feeling my man, I feel
when I did those consistently, I felt more clear, I
felt more less anxious. I felt like I could was
(13:22):
making right decisions and navigating, you know, especially that time,
navigating that as well as I could.
Speaker 2 (13:29):
A close friend of mine has gone through public, very public,
something very similar, and listen, I've been through similar. It's
very hard to be a public person going through something private,
and everybody feels like they any way more than they
actually know, and they really don't, but they know more
than they would if you were someone had no notoriety
(13:49):
at all. Yeah and so, and it's also a weird
thing too, because if you volunteer to give people information,
people then expect they can have all the information on
the whole world about you.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
Yeah, it's like, well, you you told us this, so
now we deserve to know more and more and more,
And they get mad and then they insert their on
story if they don't get exactly what they want exactly.
Speaker 1 (14:06):
Yeah and and and it's all you know, we're all
showing everything we can on social media, so like you said,
they feel like they're well, I want to know more
and wanted more about this, and you know, people make
decisions off of headlines that you know aren't true, or
things that are that are twisted or you know, and
I understand, man, like you know, we signed up for
the public side of stuff. But it is tough, man,
It's tough when you're going through something private. People forget
(14:28):
that you're you're human. You know, you're a human being,
you're somebody's son, you're you know. It's it's it's bigger
than you know. It's it's different than than than just music.
You know, there's more to.
Speaker 2 (14:37):
It, and we'll get back to that later on. I
was just thinking about the health and wellness stuff. Let's
talk about music then we bring that up. Megan Patrick.
I love Mega Patrick.
Speaker 1 (14:46):
She's the best man. She's awes didn't.
Speaker 2 (14:48):
Didn't know her, like like if sitting here, I just had.
I had seen her a couple of times. I knew
her from Mitchell a little bit of Mitchell's wife. And
I box at rumble here in town a little bit
and I don't have my glass and I can't see anything.
And I was about to go in and some blonde
girl woman lady can't really tell. It's like, hey, I'm like, hey,
(15:14):
I can't see any it wouldn't matter who it was. Hey,
I'm like, what's up because I don't know who is
it's a listener and I'm like what up? And she's like,
I'm coming over to your house. And I'm like, oh God,
I don't know what you like.
Speaker 1 (15:33):
I don't even drink.
Speaker 2 (15:34):
I don't So she was like Megan Patrick and so
she had a makeup on. She was just a sweats
and megans an athlete too. And I'm like, oh what,
I'm Megan and so she we we said hello, there,
she comes over. We do this. It's awesome. And then
we go and we play golf together in Austin. She
she told me that y'all y'all played.
Speaker 1 (15:53):
Yeah, and we played.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
We hung out for a whole day. So we had
we had had like two and a half days together,
not consecutively, but I just left left those couple of
days going Dan. Megan Patrick's like down, like, oh she's awesome, dude,
just like you want to hang out with her. You
want to be your friend. You want if you're going
to get into a fight, that's what you.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
Want to do. I always jugs to the other day,
I go, I go. If there was like a section
like in the Yearbook where it was like which couple's
gonna probably end up kicking a bunch of people's butt
in a bar fight, and go, Meghan and Timpenny would
be the couple. I put my money off. Now I
think Megan Mitchell and Megan Megan with out a beat
goes It's happened a couple of times.
Speaker 2 (16:28):
Yeah, how do you Megan know each other? How did
you get together? In the song?
Speaker 1 (16:32):
You know, we knew each other just from kind of
seeing you know, we running the same circle and knew
each other for for a while and kind of see
each other like dog House a little you'll get together
as a songwriter events or whatever's what's dog Else. It's
a place on de Mumbrey and by tin Roof, like
they have a bunch of like songwriters rounds and stuff
like that. So just kind of like you I'd see
her and Mitchell out. They had come out on the
you know, everybody gets home on Sunday, so kind of
go out and see everybody. And and I always been
(16:53):
a fan of her stuff. And here in the last
few years. You know, she's from Canada and crushing it
up there. And I started hearing some stuff and and uh,
and I was just saying, like I got the same thing.
When we first hung out with I was like, man,
she's a badass dude like this girls like she's a
she's a real deal and like not afraid to go
up to somebody and go, hey, I'm Megan. You know
what's up? And so we were we would recorded Spirits
(17:16):
and Demons first, and we just used Alison Velt, who's
one of the co writers on it, for the female part.
Speaker 2 (17:22):
So Alison saying in the place that Megan.
Speaker 1 (17:24):
In the place of Megan did yeah, until we found
somebody and so we you know, bounced around and it's always
like do you go outside of the genre, do you
stay in the genre? Who's at the label? I'm signed
to Warner, you know, so who's there that maybe we
could work something with? And started bouncing around and then
her name popped up and I was like, man, yeah,
I love her voice. Man, Like, she's got this strong
you know, she's just it's there. She's powerful, has some
(17:44):
soul and some grit to it. And we sent it
to her and they had just released her EP like
a month Greatest Show, Greatest Show on Dirt. I believe
it was called which is great EP that I love
that song, Greatest Show on Dirt. She agreed to do it,
and dude, she comes in the studio.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
Oh you did it with her?
Speaker 1 (18:02):
Like she did her part. I was there, me and
Michael Knox, who's my producer who produced all Jason Auden stuff.
Megan goes in there and like first take, and I'm like,
look at Knox. I'm like, I don't know. I mean,
I guess if she wants to re sing it, you know,
like let her do it. So she did it a
few times just to have you know, But dude, she
(18:22):
showed up, and she showed up every time and just nails.
We've been able to sing it a couple of times
live and she just crushed it. And it was like
soon as we as soon as we got in the
studio and we heard our voices together, even without any
polish or anything on it. Man, it just fit and
our voices fit real well together. And I'm excited for her, man,
and excited for her that she's a part of it.
I think that it was made.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
For and that's a single, right, we played it before
you got here. That's a single.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
It's just now what we released the day of the EP,
so we haven't picked a true single yet. I think
that's it. I think, so I'm shoot, that's what That's
what I want.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
I mean, I think it's really good.
Speaker 1 (18:56):
Thank you man.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
I was going through the EP and just looking at
some of I'd heard all the songs that I was
going through again just see who had written a bunch
of these songs. The last track Wallen and Hardy and
Josh I was born Jesse Frasier, which is pretty cool.
My favorite part of it though, is the song hate
this Town. So there's a place down here with my
(19:18):
wife and I would go eat all the time. And
this guy it was mask time too, so he just
didn't know what anybody looked like. You know. There were
times after COVID where people I had known for like
a year, I was like, that's your mouth, bro, Like
one way, the other was like that you have a goatee.
Like there are all these things that were discovered, and
(19:41):
that was one of them. I think. So we go
to this and and our waiter, we didn't really know
what his face looked like but every week we would
go and here we'd see him and he's just awesome.
And we knew his name, I knew where he lived,
and like, one of the last times we were there,
I was like, hey, so what's the deal. He says,
it's his last week working there. I said, well, like,
what are you going to do? And he said, man,
(20:01):
I'm about to sign a publishing deal? And I was like,
you're a writer. He'sai, yeah, I'm a writer, I'm an artist.
I said, we've been coming in here for twelve thirteen months.
You never once mentioned that. And I said, first of all,
in a way, that's awesome, cause everywhere, not everywhere, but
a lot of places I go, people will find a
way to either bring it up or bring bring it
to me. Not once did this guy do that. And
(20:24):
I said, well, are you any good? And he was like,
I mean I'm trying to be and so yeah, he
showed me his face. Honestly, I was like, can I
see we haven't in your face yet. We've been with
us forever. He takes his mask off and I was like, dang,
you're actually pretty good looking. And so I was doing
some stand up here at a theater in town, and
I said, hey, you're you've been awesome forever. Once you
(20:45):
come to this show, you and your friend could come
sit of the show. And he's like, oh cool. So
he comes to the show. Well, what he doesn't know
is I've got this thing planned and I say, hey,
will this Our waiter has been here for a while.
He has no idea he's going to get invited up here.
So his name is john the Clawson and he wrote
hate this Town yep, yep, and so and I didn't
put any of it together until I was looking back
(21:07):
through your EP again.
Speaker 1 (21:08):
That's wild, dude, What a what a full circle moment.
Speaker 2 (21:11):
And he came up and he killed. He did not
know he was going to perform. He didn't even have
his guitar. We had Eddie's guitar. He came up and
he crushed. But so Johnny Clawson who was that guy?
Wrote it with Kaylin Roberson and John Wood. But that
song specifically hate this Town? How did it get to you?
Speaker 1 (21:29):
You know? I love writing songs, and I write a lot,
but I also lean on the songwriting community, you know,
and all my heroes cut outside songs, and especially now
more than ever, I feel it's important for us to
lean into that community, you know, with just the way
that music is being bought. You know, there's the revenue
for songwriters isn't what it was when people were buying
tangible albums anymore. And and we're torn so much. Man.
(21:50):
I just I sometimes I just feel like it's best
I just hit my songwriter buddies and go, hey, man,
here's what we're looking for. If you're writing today and
you've you know, got anything in this vein, He's kind
of what we need. Knox actually got this song sent
to him and he put it in our drop box
and I heard it, and I grew up in Florida, man,
where it was southern rock and and you know, I
(22:12):
grew up on a lot of traditional country and and
so it had some of that pieces to it, you know,
and it just I love the I felt like i'd
gone I'd gone through that, you know a little bit.
And I think everybody's gone through that when especially in
a small town where you something has happened, and you
know a lot of times that's a breakup or something
where you never thought that this town would be a
place you wanted to get out of or needed a
break from for a little bit. Uh. And you always
(22:34):
a place that you loved and you went to, but
now there's so many memories too, There's so much going
on that you just need a break from it. I
just felt like we'd all been there and it's a
it's been a fun one to play. Man.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
Let's take a quick pause for a message from our sponsor. Wow,
and we're back on the Bobby Cast.
Speaker 2 (22:57):
You feel like you've aged a lot in the past
five years.
Speaker 1 (23:00):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
Do you feel like you have a lot of advice
now that you wouldn't have been able to give that
now you can give.
Speaker 1 (23:05):
Oh, I feel like a grandpa.
Speaker 2 (23:07):
There was a time to in my career. Yeah, where
I went. I've been through some real crap now and
for the first time I have somebody said, hey, can
you help me Mandy's advice?
Speaker 1 (23:14):
I'd be like, yep, I sure can and have Yeah, yep, absolutely, man.
Speaker 2 (23:17):
And it takes challenge, It takes going through challenges to
actually be understand why you're grateful for stuff too. Absolutely,
it gives you a new perspective.
Speaker 1 (23:26):
Yeah, man. And and you just have no other choice.
It's like you get everybody's life's going to have ups
and downs. But I believe, especially now man, that no
matter if it's the up or the down, it's all
part of the purpose to get you where you're going
to be, you know, and who you're supposed to be.
And sometimes having that wake up or having that jerk,
you know, just oh my god, life altering something happening
(23:47):
is what makes a lot of people reassess everything, you know,
and then you're in that fork in the road where
you go, Okay, well do I go this way? Do
I go this way? And either you know, and now
all of a sudden you got a clear mind because
you went through all this. And the Rocky movies are
my favorite ever, and so I always tell people on
my dude at the end, it was like Adrian, we
he's all beat up, you know, but he did it.
You know, he's a champion. It's like going through those
(24:09):
things I used to always, you know, my one of
my biggest problems was showing vulnerability. You know, I grew
up in a divorced home, a lot of fighting, you know,
a lot of verbal abuse, a lot of you know,
I was always in different places all the time, and
and so I never wanted people to see that side
I never wanted people think the bad of yeah. Yeah,
(24:31):
and so I always wanted I just never showed vulnerability.
Always try to keep that wall up, you know, And
it's exhausting. It's what I found out through the year.
So my parents got divorced when I was eight, and
then do you remember them together a little bit? I
remember one Christmas and it was a Christmas where we
grew up in this double white trailer on ten Acres
(24:51):
and my family donated. My family started the first fire station.
Speaker 2 (24:55):
In your town.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
In that town, yeah, uh, in that area, is it,
like what Eustace? Yeah, And so my grandfather, my grandmother
started that and that was at the front end of
our acreage, and everybody kind of lived all our family
lived pastors apart, you know. And so I remember one Christmas.
I don't other than that, very little, very little memories.
And it's weird how me and my little sister talks
(25:16):
about it. It's weird how you block out a lot
of things, you know. And when you look back at
my childhood, I'm like, man, there's some I don't There's
like years I'm like, where did what do we do?
Like it's just like kind of gone, did.
Speaker 2 (25:27):
Your my parents had divorced on five or six, and
I can remember barely them before my biological dad left,
just barely, right, and so I do have like this shred.
But then my biological dad was never around. I never
saw him ag until I was almost thirty six, thirty
seven years old. Did your mom and dad are they
(25:48):
still alive? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (25:48):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (25:49):
And did they remain in the same town. Did you
have a relationship with both of them? Did you go
back and forth?
Speaker 1 (25:55):
Yeah? Yeah, I did, and they they you know, my
mom was from you to there. She's from Tallahassee. But
when Ustic's high school moved down there when she was
grown up, and she grew up in a real tough
environment to you know, abused and divorced home and kind
of split and so luckily, I mean that the one
thing they did do right is they kept me and
my sister together. You know, even though I live with
(26:17):
my dad and my sister lived with my mom. Our
weekends were at the same time, you know, unless I
was playing music with my grandpa or whatever, then I
was out with him. But yeah, and that what what
was tough though, And it was tough bro until not
that long ago. Was my mom and my dad.
Speaker 2 (26:31):
Their relationship was so tumultuous.
Speaker 1 (26:33):
Yeah yeah, yeah. I mean we to a point where
I was like, man, listen, I can't put somebody over
here and somebody. You know, I didn't ask for any
of this, you know, I was we were I was eight,
my sister was six. Like, we didn't ask for any
of this, you know, like both of y'all remarried and separated.
You know. Let's you know, also, I need you to
look at it as I know you got some personal
stuff there. But that's my dad and that's my mom.
(26:55):
So I you know, imagine.
Speaker 2 (26:56):
You have these conversations with them. That's a that's a
tough conversation to be the kid and the adult.
Speaker 1 (27:01):
It's tough, man, It's tough, and it's and it's a
weird thing too. Is. I feel like in life there
is that switch where it starts we all of a sudden,
your parents are like my mom is you know, call
me and my sister and my dad's calling us for advice.
And I'm like, when did this happen? You know what
I mean? Like when did we become the I'm like, Dad,
what are you doing?
Speaker 2 (27:17):
Bro?
Speaker 1 (27:17):
You can't do you know you can't do that, or Mom,
don't you know? And uh, it is, it's it's weird, man.
But I wasn't confident in doing that until I went
to I did my first ever. I never really done
therapy before. And uh, there's a group of guys and
a guy named Al here in Nashville that has helped
a lot of artists out and him and a guy
named Miles.
Speaker 2 (27:36):
And so I've been on site, so that's okay, yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
No, but I went to a place in Arizona that's
like yeah, and so it was dude, I won't mention
because we obviously got to keep things of private in
those things. But I go to Arizona, right, This is
this was a this is such like a god like
universe moment of just like humbleness but also what people
think our lives are, you know, from the Instagram or
from a social media whatever they've made in their hip. Bro,
(28:03):
I go to Arizona for therapy seven days intense. I
mean it was, like the guy told me, because you
pretty much went from not driving a car to the
Daytona five hundred, right, and h I go in there
and known exactly what dude, I just started feeling like
I was getting angry, started feeling I was getting some
traits that people in my family had and I wasn't
being able to control them. And I was like, I'm
I want to nip this in the butt. I've always
(28:24):
felt since I was a kid, I was a guy
that was going to change my family's path. And I
started seeing those things pop up, and you know, all
of a sudden, my anger or this shit that's not me,
you know, and I'm like, we got to do something.
And h somebody at a friend of mine at the
label reached out to al and aw hook me up
at this place. And first person I meet when I
walk in, their first person in my group, it's from Franklin,
(28:44):
tonnes site.
Speaker 2 (28:45):
Really you had to go random Arizona, Random Arizona.
Speaker 1 (28:49):
And it even better, I do.
Speaker 2 (28:50):
Do you see at the wy Yeah, Steve, what are
you doing here?
Speaker 1 (28:53):
B So I thought maybe I'd get out and it'd
be you know, no one would know, and it would
just be you know, me and a bunch of people
in a group. And it was when I want to
I'm driving to my first day park, get a call
from my management, Hey, congratulations, whiskey and rain went number
one A week early. It looks like you're about to
have your first two week number one. And it was
(29:13):
already right to go, about to go platinum. I just
pulled into therapy. I'm sitting in the parking lot, get
this call, dude, And it was just this rush of
emotions because I think I didn't realize, you know, coming
from the South, coming from you don't talk about stuff.
Speaker 2 (29:27):
Therapy was not a thing for what people did, what
rich people did on TV. Yeah, and there were shrinks
and that's just not for us because we got to
worry about eating, not going to have mental health jet yeah,
or are you looking?
Speaker 1 (29:37):
You go, I'm not paying you one hundred and fifty
dollars an hour to talk to you. You know, I'll
go and do this or I'll go whatever. And all
douz is just push it down and push it down.
And at some point it's like filling up a five
gallon bucket. You know, it only can hold five gallons,
you put five and a half. Half of it's falling out,
you know. And so I think it's what we do
as humans. We just push it down, push it down,
push down, and then it comes out in an angry
way or in a way that you grew up that
(29:59):
all of a sudden you're like, oh, wow, why did
I just say that, you know? Or why did I
just do that?
Speaker 2 (30:03):
It's funny you were seeing some of those traits that
you didn't want to have that maybe you had seen
though as a kid in yeah, and you to even
acknowledge to even have the where it's all to go, oh,
I see this, Yeah, I don't like it. Yeah, because
sometimes I'll have these but I don't I can't notice.
I don't have the capability to go oh. Some of
(30:23):
my wife would be like, hey, just so you know,
you're spiraling, and I'm like, oh, you're right.
Speaker 1 (30:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (30:28):
The fact that you could see it in yourself, like
that's that's pretty mature.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
Yeah, I mean it was. It was. I think I
just those are the memories I have growing up of
some of those you know, holes punched in walls and
you know, all of that stuff that I never did that,
but it was like those little things where I was like, oh,
that's close. And then I also had a my mom's sister.
Not to get all down, but my mom's sister took
her own life around just before that time, and I
(30:54):
remember sitting at the service, and for the first time
ever before I went into the therapy, like I literally,
dude could sit on my count and this is not me,
Like I'm up in the morning at the gym, like
I try to like live every second I can. And Dude,
for months, man, I couldn't get off the There'd be
days where I just didn't literally no, no, should just
checked out and numb Laurie like I could. I'd look
(31:15):
at that water bowl and go, man, I'm thirsty and
sit there for ten hours, you know, and I had,
and I could, and I'd break out of it for
a little bit, but then I'd go out, you know,
and then I'd come back and isolate. And that was
my problem, is isolation. And I realized that once stuff
get bad, I just removed myself from the stuff.
Speaker 2 (31:31):
I do the same thing.
Speaker 1 (31:32):
And it's tough, man, And it's from friends, you know,
people calling you, people hitting you up, and and luckily, man,
I got a good group of guys around me. You know.
Brandley Gilbert was one of them that called me and
was like, hey, get in that jeep, get your ass
down to my house for a few days and come
hang out, you know. And so it was all these things.
I started realizing, I'm like, I don't like the fact
that I feel like somebody's driving the ship and I'm
(31:53):
looking at it.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
Did they were you diagnosed as being clinically depressed when
you were started going to therapy?
Speaker 1 (31:57):
All right? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (31:58):
Or were you just like going that I was depressed?
Speaker 1 (32:00):
Uh no, They told me that because I had to go.
So what it ends up happening? They said that when
your body has so much going on that there's two
ways that it reacts, right, and it's either this hyperactive
thing where that's the nervous people that are you know,
or it's like paralyzed. And they're like, that's what you
fighter flight. Yeah, it's fight or flight exactly. Yeah. And
so that's pretty much what I was what I was
dealing with, you know. And then and then what's what's
(32:22):
more messed up about that situation is in your mind,
you're like, why am I doing this? I know I
shouldn't be doing this. Why am I not answering this call?
Why am I not doing this whatever? But it's like
your body's not It's like I can't go. I want
to grab that book, but like someone's holding me down,
you know, And it was the weirdest thing. So I
think all of that and then starting to notice like
(32:43):
anger and the different things I didn't like seeing growing up.
And like I said, I always felt like I was
a guy that was meant to change the path of
my my family, and and I just wanted to wanted
to change it, man. And luckily, you know, somebody at
Warner stepped in, and a lot like your wife, you
know something we need people like you need your wife,
And those situations where it's like, hey, Bobby, because I
love you.
Speaker 2 (33:03):
And I'm always irritated and you don't even understand. You
don't even know what I mean, what I've been through.
And then it's like after like after she tells me
this and I have an hour, I'm like, god, dang,
she was right. She was right. And sometimes she tells
me this and I'm like, you don't even and in
my mind be going, She's been right the other right time.
So still I'm like, you don't even know. It's like
I cannot stop the cycle of telling her she's wrong
(33:25):
when she's always right.
Speaker 4 (33:27):
The Bobby cast will be right back, Welcome back to
the Bobby Cast.
Speaker 2 (33:39):
I just think, are we have parallel paths here in
a lot of ways, from where we come from, the
culture that we were in, what we were exposed to,
what the people in our towns did. I'm from a
very hard working mill town. Like that's work. You go
and you work, and then you have a few hours
in the evening and then you go to sleep and
you go to work again.
Speaker 1 (33:57):
Right.
Speaker 2 (33:58):
And so for me, I always been so scared to
have kids because I don't want to make that mistake
that my biological father did, which he was just gone.
I don't I don't know him now met him. We
don't hate him anymore, but we don't have a relationship.
You coming from where you come from, does that concern
you at all with having children? Because again you can
(34:20):
sit and have the understanding of I'm going into these patterns.
Does that Does it concern you that you would do
that as a dad?
Speaker 1 (34:26):
No, because I wanted to break that before that ever happened,
you know, before I ever have a family. I didn't
want that to be my first reaction. And so because
I feel, I really feel what you're saying, because I've
always kind of battled that too, of like do I
want to have kids? What if I repeat this process.
That's my fear, you know. And if I repeat it
(34:47):
and I don't even know I'm going down that rabbit,
that pattern, I don't see it, and all of a
sudden boom, I look up and I'm in it. You know,
this is not what I wanted. And now I'm dragging
a kid through. You know what I went through and
all that as hell, Man, you don't want I would
never want to do that. But then there's also a
part of me, man, and I think over the last
couple of years, it just really made me feel like
there's a bigger purpose in life, and that's something I
(35:10):
want to I hope to experience one day.
Speaker 2 (35:11):
You know, when you were at and we'll just call
it your therapy camp, that's what I called. I was
at a pretty bad place where i'd have any connections, Like,
I didn't feel true connections with people. I was just numb.
Instead of drinking because I don't drink. I've never drank
because of my biological debt. They all drink, so I've
(35:33):
never drank. But what I would do is I would
just work just the same thing. Just you just find
something to consume yourself with so you don't feel other things.
And that's what I was doing all the time, all
the time, all the time. And so I had a
couple different friends and I said their names. I don't
think they would care, and it's not a name drop,
but just to acknowledge how important they were at the time.
Dave Haywood, Oh yeah, he's one of the sweetest guys
(35:54):
from Lady, A very analytical guy but also super creative.
And he was like, hey, man, you're having to run
your own crap and you're also having to like be
creative and think and and you know, come up with
these ideas at the same time you're managing folk. He
was like, if you thought about on site and I
want to go some therapy, I mean, I'd go to therapy,
but I'm not going on something hoity toty therapy. Yeah,
(36:15):
what am I going to live for?
Speaker 1 (36:16):
As I feel that was the same way man.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
And so he's like, just think about it. I said, okay, okay.
Nicole Galli and I talked to me about it a
little bit because Nicole and myself and Ross Kaufran had
done this secret writing project together. We'd written all these
songs and did it under a fake name, and so
we did, and and then it was honestly, Tyler Hubbard
and I had got into a huge fight. A couple
of them. They had like come at me randomly, and
then we'd always like get on the phone and he'd
(36:41):
yell at me, I'd yell at him, and then we'd
be like cool again. And we went to have coffee
once and he was like, bro, you need to go
out to Osie. That's my best tiler of impression. And
I was like, really because he had helped me complete it,
and so it was freaking Tyler.
Speaker 1 (36:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (36:54):
Who And We've been up and down in our relationship
for my whole time I've been here, but it was
definitely one of those places we were good. He was like,
it would really help you because I think Tyler and
I very I think that's probably why we but had
sometimes two were very similar.
Speaker 1 (37:06):
Yeah, he's at workaholic too.
Speaker 2 (37:08):
That guy stop very similar. So I trusted him and
I went and there was an entire group that was together,
and then there was me and some of the folks
that were like, you won't want to get in a
group because people are gonna know who you are and
you're gonna worry that they're going to be telling folks
stuff off your show. So I did I think six days,
five or six days of eight hours a day.
Speaker 1 (37:27):
One on one on one, one on Oh.
Speaker 2 (37:30):
I hadn't cried in years, and I remember telling the
lady that same therapist, that same therapist every day.
Speaker 1 (37:35):
Right, Oh my goodness. I'm like, that's heavy.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
I don't cry. I wish I could cry. I'm like
a bathtub that hasn't been unclothed.
Speaker 5 (37:42):
Yeah, and it's got like hair in and the waters
like green. There's maybe some book. And she was like, well,
I'm not going to force you to cry, but at
some point it's gonna happen.
Speaker 2 (37:53):
Day one, Nope, Day two. Note a couple of things
happened day three. Day four. We did this thing where
you put like a scarf on it and you talk
to it. It's the scarf like reminds you of one
of your relevant Dude, Yeah, it's my grandma who raised me.
Speaker 1 (38:05):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (38:05):
So she's like, talk to your grandma.
Speaker 1 (38:07):
Boom bude, just gone.
Speaker 2 (38:10):
And I couldn't from then on for the next couple
of days, I could not not cry. Yeah, because once
it hit and it was the biggest breakthrough I've ever had.
Speaker 1 (38:19):
Mine was I and Ed m R. Yeah done that too,
That was mine, dude. Mine and I went there very
and it was funny cause it's a very similar thing.
They were like, do you want to do the group whatever?
And I was like, I don't want to stay there,
so I gotta I got a place next to it.
But I was like, I'll I think in my mind
it was like I just I'll do whatever I got
to do to get out of this, right, and so
just where I need to go, let's go, let's do it,
(38:40):
and I'll be a part of all of it. So
the first day I get there and they're doing the group,
which is like, you know, everybody's saying there's strangers in there,
like they're saying what they're there for, and like some
people were there for, like I mean, they're really going
through stuff, you know, And it gets I'm like last,
and everybody's saying and I'm like, then what am I
going to say? I'm a little mad, you know, like
I've got to going through some anger issues like this
guy's like his family's falling apart, you know, and I'm
(39:01):
like and so I just stood up there and I
was like, hey, I don't really know how to say this.
I go, this is my first time doing this, I said,
but and I debated on if I want to do this,
and I schod. But Michael Roach is my actual name,
Michael Ray is a stage name or whatever you want
to call it. I go, I'm a country artist. I go,
here's why I'm here. Blah blah blah. I go, And I,
oddly enough have the number one song in country radio
(39:23):
right now. And this guy I'll never forget. He was
sitting over there, and he was an older guy. And
after the group, he comes up to me and that
kind of opened up everybody and then all of a sudden,
everybody starts talking a little bit more. And now that group, dude.
By day two, day three, we were like we're in
a group text, you know, and like really leaning on
each other. And the one guy had been in therapy
quite a bit throughout his life, and he was in
his late sixties, mid sixties, and he told me, he's like, man,
(39:45):
he goes, you come in here in your early thirties.
He goes, you won't go through what I've had to
go through. You know, you're doing it now. And and
we would do the group and then we would do
a few sessions one on one and then group, and
there's a few sessions and the group we had to
do those where you set the hear up. And it
was that same exact thing to me, man, And it
was like, my grandpa died two weeks before my first
(40:09):
single came out, and three days before my house a
blue show where all the in Orlando we sold out,
all radios comeing, they Warner brought everybody in. He passed
away two days before that. And then and then he
was supposed to be the opry and me and him.
That's how I learned it all. Three weeks after he passed,
I get an email, Hey, pick your opry date, and
I'm like, you know, And so I didn't realize that
(40:32):
I was in the radio tour. So what did I do?
I go honor my grandfather at the show. That's what
he'd want me to do. Show goes great. I said,
as guitar that he played for forty fifty years up
there had a light on it, went to the service,
wrote us a bituary, did everything right back out on
the road. And I did that every time someone passed away.
Didn't mourn never, never, Really, I'm mourned in that moment.
Speaker 2 (40:52):
But not you didn't. You didn't have time to like
natally and yeah, and I just.
Speaker 1 (40:56):
Left, you know. And then and then I realized I
did that E M D R DMR whichever. Someone messed up.
But dude, that was why I went, like, I didn't
know anything about that stuff. But many this one they
put these prongs in your hand like vibes, and I'm
closed my eyes and I'm talking. And one of the
craziest things do that happened on the last day. She
(41:17):
goes to you, she goes, what do you see now?
And I go, I see my grandparents in there in
that door, And I said, my grandma's wearing this white
shirt with like some stuff like embroidery on it. But
she's not old. She's like in her fifties, see on forties.
I said, she's got these coke bottle big glasses on
they used to wear in the nineties, and her hair
prin druss and my grandpa's wearing a blue polo shirt.
I describe everything right, And then it hits me. I
(41:40):
have that photo in my phone, in an old photo,
and they were standing there, man, and it was just
it was And then again, they tell you to talk
to them it, which sounds so crazy when you're talking
right now.
Speaker 2 (41:51):
You know, it sounds crazy to even start doing it.
But once you start, oh dude, then you're like.
Speaker 1 (41:55):
It's like a baptism. Bro. It's like it's like you're
you just you know, bro, you know, I'm bubble ugly crying.
And it was like that man, I told him, I
go if that's the only reason I came, like I
felt like this massive. I feel like God just put
a took his hand and pulled the way off, you know.
But it's because al and then got me into that place,
and I know how because of Tyler and all them.
(42:17):
So it's kind of a weird yeah, weird circle.
Speaker 2 (42:19):
But you know, I guess I never cried. There was
a little shame for me and crying, not because there
was any sort of masculinity, like men don't cry. I
didn't have a male influence really, right, my dad was gone,
but I didn't even call my dad. But for the
sake of this, my biological I was gone. I had
a head football coach who was a father figure ish
as much as you can be when it's not even
your kid. Very much disciplined, how a youth director who
helped but never had a dad, so it was very missed.
(42:40):
So my not crying was never oh I can't, men
don't cry. It was like, people already think I'm weak
and I'm already the charity case, so I'm not gonna
cry because I can't show weakness because they already think
I'm weak. So it was never a masculinity thing, but
it was a shame in being not as much. I
didn't feel like people would feel like I had value.
(43:02):
So I have trouble crying. And even the first time
I started crying in therapy, I was just so embarrassed.
Oh yeah, I was just like, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
She was like, great, why are you sorry? And I
was like, no, no, I shouldn't be doing this. And
I still struggle with that, but that was a big
part of that for me, was just crying and not
apologizing for it.
Speaker 1 (43:21):
Yeah, And I think people grew up like we did.
Sorry is our first go to. Yeah, I apologize. I'm like,
why did I just apologize? Sometimes I'm sorry? It's like
just comes out. And I think it's because growing up, man,
you know, my dad was a paramedic firefighter too for
twenty something years, and so the PTSD that he never
got taken care of until later on in his career. Dude,
(43:43):
that I mean it made growing up sometimes hell, you know.
Speaker 2 (43:46):
And he probably didn't even know why he was being
affected in ways he was being affected.
Speaker 1 (43:50):
Dude. He would wake up in the mill of the night.
And I remember one that some of the craziest stuff,
manbe I was like eight or nine. My parents got divorced,
and I was at my grandparents' house and I stayed
a lot with them, and my grandpa was, you know,
teach me chords on the guitar, and I was always
over there. He would call it like two in the
morning and my grandpa coming, hey, wake up, say hey
your dad. I'm like, hey, hey, you good? Yeah? All,
(44:11):
I love you. And that'd be it. Later on in life,
I'd ask my dad later on as an adult, I'm like, hey, man,
why would you call us like two in the morning,
you know where we were at? And he goes, Man goes,
because I just worked a call on an eight year
old who God had the same here you know everything,
And it was like and then the dude, these these
men and women are trained to literally me and you
go see horror I mean a horror movie in real life,
(44:35):
take it to the hospital, do all this stuff, and
then go you good, Yeah, all right, Hey, we're we're
back in yeah, or go eat a sandwich, you know,
And they push it back in here because they have to.
That next call might be right as soon as they
call in. That next call might be the exact same
or worse, or it might be some you know, an
older lady slipping fella needs help picking up, or it
could be what you just saw. And so he all
he never got help for that. He never talked to
(44:56):
anybody and did it. We did. Just came out in anger.
He was pissed off because of you know, stuff that
he had gone through, and it was over controlling and
just a lot of like you know, a lot of
just got whatever can stop the fighting, I'll do.
Speaker 2 (45:08):
That's heavy stuff that I don't think that I think
about enough either. With the jobs military, I understand, I
don't even understand, but like I understand that I don't understand,
like I stand with it. But yeah, even like a
paramedic you're just see or a police officer. Yeah, man
aside from the possibility of you dying by some bad
dude killing you. Just what you're seeing by going to Rex,
(45:29):
like like, that's some traumatizing stuff.
Speaker 1 (45:31):
Yeah, man, Or hearing like the screams of somebody that's
pulling up to a scene and they don't know if
their loved one's okay. You know, it's just I mean,
I and there's a lot that I didn't understand obviously
growing up, I'm like, why is my dad this way? Yeah,
and it was. He made it made a lot of
things really tough. But as you get older, I think
you have empathy. You know. Also when I went to there,
but we did this like family tree thing. Dude, when
you look at it written up, you're like, man, we've
(45:52):
been screwed up for generations.
Speaker 2 (45:53):
This is generations total pull.
Speaker 1 (46:00):
But yeah, it was. So I think that made me
have a little more empathy. And then he went and
got taught to somebody really figured out, you know, man,
you got to you gotta get this stuff straighten out
because it's getting where it's hard to live with you,
you know. And so I think I think him just
going through that stuff really caused it to be harder.
And then because of that, it was all, there's so
much fighting all the time that I would just a
(46:22):
people pleased. And that was one of the things I
brought with me into my adult life, I guess, which
made stuff really hard. And you're like, yeah, i'll do
this yet, and then you're panicking because you add too
much stuff to your plate. Now you got all this
stuff going on. So I think the saying I'm sorry
or the people pleasing all this stuff guys like you
and I where we grew up. Man, it's just it's
it just comes out. You know, I'm crying, I'm sorry.
Who are you started for?
Speaker 2 (46:41):
I feel like you have so much perspective, and perspective's
hard to get because you never want to have to
get it because for you to have to get perspective
means a lot of things didn't go right. But it's
also like the most valuable thing. Perspective and empathy are
like the most valuable things you could possibly own, but
you can't own them if you don't do the work
or go through the crap to get on Yep. Yeah,
I feel like at this point in your life you
have had to develop so much perspective, yeah, man, and
(47:03):
understanding what would you do differently if you could go back,
because I feel like a little bit this is I
don't know you that well. You know, I've spent a
couple of months. I don't know your ex at all,
so I have no I know nothing. What would you
have done differently with that whole relationship? Would you have
slowed it down a little bit?
Speaker 1 (47:22):
Yeah? You know, I think too, if I'm being honest,
I think being really the only true thing I ever
knew about love or marriage was my grandparents, or my
aunt and uncle, my gun uncle, my dad's brother him
and my aunt Kim. They'd met when they were fifteen
and fourteen, and that was it for the rest of
their life, you know, until my uncle passed away. And
(47:43):
so those are the only two things. And I always going, man,
I want that. Or I'd go to my friend's house,
you know, and i'd see them and their family or whatever,
and there was none of the at least obviously when
you're over there, they're not showing you what's really happening.
But I think, you know, I can't speak for her,
but I think from it was like, man, look at
all this going right, I think she was, you know.
(48:04):
I also we weren't around each other a lot, and
we're both touring arts. Yeah, man, and so you got
the one day and that you're trying to cram it
in to see each other and do what you know,
and you're packing and you know you're out again. And
so I probably would have slowed things down. I wouldn't
have been so influenced by I think the people, you know,
fans being involved in it, and you know, to be honest,
(48:26):
I think I knew in the beginning or around that time,
that this was something we probably should have slowed down.
Speaker 2 (48:33):
If I could go back, I would not have exposed
my wife to the public as early as I did.
And we still waited a while, but I was like,
you know, I lived my life very openly. She never
really had an interest in being exposed. Right, exposed is
a weird word, but just like, you know, really just
exposing people, because it really made it hard, really hard
(48:55):
for her because she that's not her favorite thing is
to be public. She's not trying to be an influencer.
That's not her life. She's very family oriented, not trying
to be famous. But what I did by doing it earlier,
I think it came on so hard and strong for her.
It was a it was a negative, and she was like,
I don't like this very much, and I already already
(49:16):
didn't love it, So I'm just gonna kind of take
another half step back where I wish I would have
just waited a little longer in that What was that
conversation like for you guys, like, Okay, are we going
to do this? Because I would also think if I
were you guys, I would love the attention because two together.
Speaker 1 (49:32):
Oh dude, I mean, I mean, listen, I'm not gonna lie.
Speaker 2 (49:34):
Yeah, it's the greatest thing ever.
Speaker 1 (49:35):
It's cool as shit, you know when you want, you know,
and you see Tim and Faith and you know Garthatricia,
and you know, we were both coming up kind of
at the same time, her and I. So it was
like it wasn't like one was over here and the
other one was, you know, first starting out, it was
like we're kind of right there at you said, So
it was a lot to celebrate. But yeah, I mean, yeah,
it's it's yeah, I'm not gonna lie do it is
It's a lot of.
Speaker 2 (49:55):
A lot of perks come with you flatch some of
the toughness, honestly, like all three hundreds, like look, at
these two. I don't want to say names. I'm not
gonna bring her name up because it's not but it's like,
look at these two together, because sometimes when you put
two together, it's.
Speaker 1 (50:08):
Bigger than the absolutely man then the two individual lead. Yeah.
And one thing too that we didn't like, we didn't
do counseling. We didn't do any of that before. And
I think that and there was moments that I look
back now and I'm like, why didn't I speak up
on that? Like that was one of the first times
I realized her and I are opposite, you know, and
I'm a very much more extroverted, you know person, and
(50:32):
she's not. And so there was a lot of different things.
I come from a big family that, you know, everybody helped.
My cousins had keys on my dad's you know, we
used to just go we'd go and we wouldn't have
food at the house, and we'd go just go to
my uncle's house and we'd be in there cooking. They
weren't even home, you know, Like it was just that,
you know, So there were little things that I think
if we would have done that, I think we would
have seen that, oh, this isn't We're when when you
(50:54):
do have the two at the same time and it's
even the same business and it's all the eyes are
on you, it's very easy to keep that Hey everything's good,
even when you're home, you know, and you're really not
going you're really not addressing issues, you're not really knowing
each other. Honestly, it's just like, hey, we're here for
twenty four hours and I kind of got to do
(51:14):
this meeting. I do just this meeting. You going to
do dinner at five? Cool? You know, And I don't
think we really just realized that, man, this is we're opposite.
Speaker 2 (51:23):
At one point on the internet, did you go, I
can't read this. I can't look at this up anymore
because one it's either not fear not true, or it's
just overwhelming for me to see.
Speaker 1 (51:30):
Yeah, I uh yeah, I thought for a while, I
went I went dark for a little bit, just because
there was there was so much that isn't true, and
there's so much that was twisted, and it was just
like out of nowhere, everybody's just like, oh, look what
he did. I'm like, well, what are you talking about? Like,
first off, none of y'all were around, you know, for
(51:51):
three years and you don't know anything that happened. You
just know what this headline on what she has said.
And because I don't believe in throwing shade at her
or any of that stuff. We were both learning and
growing up. And I'm not trying to ruin what she's
trying to go into. If she wants to, you know
what I mean, she gets another relation, I don't. I
don't want to ruin any of that. I don't want,
(52:11):
you know, I hope she has the best success and
does everything that she wants. I'm not trying to make
this this you know, beef. Yeah, between us two, Like listen,
both of us dropped the ball in a lot of ways.
And that's the truth, you know, And so we I
didn't show up after, you know, the wedding day because
by that point in time, there was a lot of
stuff that she did show up for and it was
just kind of like there's stuff that happened that day
where I was like, I'm out, you know. And and
(52:34):
again I never went to therapeut and never did any
of this stuff. So it was just I had all
this stuff built up, and then I think the fear
of am I repeating this process? What did I do
what about you know, and so all of that kind
of just it was a lot, man. It really took
its toll, and I think just we just didn't we
showed up at two different times. And then then to
(52:55):
to kind of go back to where you're asking about
the comments, I had to I had bought my tongue
a lot, man, because I was your restraint.
Speaker 2 (53:03):
Yeah, top notch, just having a restraint period. Even if
every comment was right or wrong, I would have just
been in the mix. Yeah, it would have been completely
unhealthy and for me, and i'd have been but I'd
have been in it, and I'd made myself worse. But
you never You didn't say anything. He didn't put a
song out, you didn't get in the comments. I mean,
I don't know how. I don't know how you did
it if you had good people in your ear.
Speaker 1 (53:25):
Yeah, yeah, you know, I think a lot my management
team who was helping me a lot during that time also, Man,
I just realized too. I went home, I went to Eustless, Florida,
and stayed at my uncle and ant's house and they're
downstairs and hung with family. And it was at that
COVID time where no one was working we weren't toaring
it was. It was Florida, so it was open, you know,
(53:45):
Florida we were doing. Never got Florida, never got COVID
yet stopped at the Georgia line. Yeah. So dude, I
think I just got re and retouched with your roots, man,
because you know, I mean, like you were saying, we're
all over the place all the time, and it's very
easy to get disconnected. And I think I was during
that ang that that was when I started seeing some
(54:06):
of that anger start popping up. And then I went
from oh, you won't say that, Okay, Well now the
trailer park uses Florida kick comes out, you know, and
I'm like I'm ready to fight, and I'm like, what
do you say? You don't know anything about this, And
so I was like, I need to go home, chill
with my mom, you know, with my buddies, fish with
my cousin, just do stuff that we did and just
(54:26):
reconnecting and push that all away and not even not
even look at it.
Speaker 2 (54:30):
It had been hard to even listen to the radio though,
because you're on all of a sudden, you hear a
song about you and you're like, mother, oh yeah, I.
Speaker 1 (54:37):
Just embraced that. I just turned it up. Good for you. Yeah,
I was like, screw it up, man, let's go.
Speaker 3 (54:42):
Let's take a quick pause for a message from our sponsor.
This is the Bobby Cast.
Speaker 2 (54:54):
Did you write songs that you'd never put out?
Speaker 1 (54:56):
Yeah, yeah, there's a couple. I wrote one with my
buddy John Saderfield and John Stone that might put out
at some point, but it's not. It was mainly just honestly,
I don't I don't think I actually will. Because we
were on my bus one day and they came out
to write, and I was just like, man, because everybody
kept asking he gonna write a song, you know, just
I was like.
Speaker 2 (55:13):
No, because everybody felt like they would have backed. I mean, honestly,
we're all like, yeah, wow, like he's it's going hard
on him? True, not true. We don't know. I don't
know your relationship. I don't know what happened. But it's like, god, dang,
there's like six songs in every song about you, like,
how's he not respect FONDI.
Speaker 1 (55:29):
Yeah, and that was, you know, I mean I think
she could have gone a different way of that, and
I think it was you know, I think you know, also,
I don't think people realize we we both we grew
up and broken broken homes. We know people from our
hometown Sadly, in small towns, broken homes is more common
than ever. Now. I know how hard a divorce can be.
I've seen it, seen it when my parents have seen
(55:49):
it with buddies of mine. I got friend of mine
with four kids. He's hundreds of thousands of dollars and
still fighting. You know, in there, it's just wow, it's hell.
We didn't own anything together. We both prenups. I haven't
seen her, spoken to her in three and a half years.
I went my way, she went hers vorce paper sent
to my manager's office. I signed them, got sent to
her business manager's office. She signed them. That was it.
Speaker 2 (56:12):
That's clean.
Speaker 1 (56:13):
That was clean. It's c There's not this like And
I'm not downplaying anything, and I'm not downplaying Hardbury, what
anybody goes through, or any of that. But when you
look at what my problem was, why are we trying
to make a financial gain on something that is not
what is being portrayed? You know, when I see friends
of mine that have gone through hell and back, you know,
on both sides of the fence, man process of a divorce,
(56:34):
the process through the fighting back and forth. I'm like,
you know, yes with ours was public. Yes there is
some answers to fans, Like you said, they feel like
they needed and a we let them in, so you
got to you know. But on the on the whole thing,
I was like, man, this isn't as what This isn't
what people think it was, you know, and it was
as clean as it could be. It was a breakup
(56:54):
with paperwork. I hate that it happened. No one gets
married to get divorced. I It's something that haunted me
for years, you know, made me mad at myself, made
me you know, you over you played things through where
I did look back and go, maybe I should have
done that different. You know, I think you have no
other choice in those situations to look in the mirror
and go, Okay, what what did I What did I
do out of this?
Speaker 2 (57:14):
What?
Speaker 1 (57:14):
How can I stop what I did? If what I
contributed to this? How do I not bring this into
the next and which is how it helped me get
through all of it, you know. But that was the
part that really just kind of stuck to me a lot.
Was like, man, I don't think people realize like this
wasn't this like gruesome battle. It was trying to be
forced to be something way bigger than it was, you know.
(57:35):
And I think too, that's why I didn't want to
add any flame to the fire. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (57:39):
It's funny too, is you'll be able to help somebody
else the way Brandley called you, because I'm thinking I've
I've had a lot of contents with Branley, both in
professional settings and like, if we're playing a festival at
the same place, you just hang with people, right, And
I like Brandley a lot me too.
Speaker 1 (57:52):
May it's salt of the earth. What you see is
what you get. Don't get any better, man.
Speaker 2 (57:56):
Like, yeah, probably pretty scary, dude, if you want to
be scary towards you, I wouldn't, but.
Speaker 1 (58:00):
I wouldn't shove them in an alley, but.
Speaker 2 (58:02):
Ye, but I would also if I needed something. And
Brandley and I don't talk a whole lot, but I
do feel like I've had a connection with Brandley where
I could call and be like, hey, dude, would you
help me? And he would come and help me without
it being said he did that for you. Because Brandley's
been through some crap.
Speaker 1 (58:14):
Yeah, man, crap that he probably.
Speaker 2 (58:16):
Was like if I handle that different, I would totally.
And you're doing this now, and what's going to happen
is and I'm sure of it. It's gonna come around
where you're gonna be able to do that for somebody now.
Speaker 1 (58:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (58:26):
Yeah, And that's that perspective and empathy that you never
really want to sign up for that paperwork, like, I'll
have some perspective and empathy because it sucks to have
it because you had to get it through something.
Speaker 1 (58:35):
Yeah, I didn't have it before.
Speaker 2 (58:36):
It's so valuable. Yeah, and it rounds you out as
a person. And I feel like you're like, I mean
like I'm just looking at you, but I feel like
you're like happy.
Speaker 1 (58:43):
I am, man, I just feel in a good place.
I feel I've also allowed you know, I think one
of the cool things about therapy is it shows you
how to use tools when you're out of there.
Speaker 2 (58:52):
What I say, like, if therapy doesn't fix you, it
just give it.
Speaker 1 (58:55):
Gives you tools to understand how to do it. And
so it's allowed me to win instant before when I
I help myself feeling that like kind of just sitting
on the couch. I don't want to do anything. You know.
I don't know if it's really feel sorry for yourself,
but in a way, I guess, you know, And now
I know how to stop that. Now I go, well,
what am I doing?
Speaker 2 (59:13):
You know?
Speaker 1 (59:13):
Get up, do something, call.
Speaker 2 (59:14):
Somebody, or at least have the awareness that it's happening,
or at least have the weareness to me is sometimes
I can't stop it, but I'm like, I know this
is not good. I know what's happening, and I can
say something A want and they can. She can help
me a little bit.
Speaker 1 (59:25):
Man.
Speaker 2 (59:25):
That's I mean, this has been a really good, like
healthy mind. This is all health and wellness.
Speaker 3 (59:29):
Man.
Speaker 1 (59:29):
I think we might we might have.
Speaker 2 (59:30):
So this is the new show.
Speaker 1 (59:32):
This is it.
Speaker 2 (59:33):
Let me say this that Spirits and Demons out now
with Megan Patrick. The new EP, Dive Bars and Broken
Hearts came out in June, because we're in July, so
two weeks.
Speaker 1 (59:42):
Ago, I believe.
Speaker 2 (59:43):
Yeah, So it's out. It's six tracks. You are you
on the road a lot? Now? Is it back full?
Speaker 1 (59:49):
Oh? Yeah? Man? Yo, it's this year really feels like
it's like it's twenty nineteen, like the last couple of years.
It was obviously twenty twenty one was weird. Twenty twenty
two was more open. You kind of had some of
the places that were you know, you had a show
car whatever. But now it's Yeah, me and John Party
played Barefoot Fest I think in New Jersey and it's
(01:00:12):
like third Thursday, like twenty seven thousand people out there
on a Thursday on the beast. If we're back, Yeah, it's.
Speaker 2 (01:00:16):
Full full till congratulations. Man. I just I don't know
a like an existence that just feels healthy.
Speaker 1 (01:00:24):
Thank you man.
Speaker 2 (01:00:25):
You know that's it's awesome, Like that's where it is. Yeah,
that's that's what it is. And you're gonna have songs
to go number one, and you're gonna have seasons that
you can't get anything to work, and you're gonna get
back to the number one again. Yes, seasons again. But
that ain't as much as what it's about. It is
like just that that consistency and knowing that for me,
like there's value regardless.
Speaker 1 (01:00:45):
Yeah, and you know there's more. We look, we're so
fortunate to do what we love and we're passionate about
what we do what we do, but it's not who
we are.
Speaker 2 (01:00:52):
Yeah, I struggle with that. My identity. I really struggle
with what my identity is. Yeah, say man, I'm working
towards it. I still suck at.
Speaker 1 (01:01:00):
He He's just making tomorrow better than today.
Speaker 2 (01:01:01):
You guys follow Michael Ray at Michael Ray Music, Instagram, TikTok,
Michael Ray Official on TikTok, and you guys check out
the new music this is out now. Michael, good to
see buddy
Speaker 3 (01:01:10):
You tue, Buddy, Thank you man, thanks for listening to
a Bobby Cast production
I can't speak for her, but I think for me
it was like I wouldn't have been so influenced by
the fans being involved in it. And to be honest,
I think I knew in the beginning or around that time,
that this was something we probably should have slowed down.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
This is episode four hundred and seven with Michael Ray.
He walked in and he just looked like a wrestler,
professional wrestler. He did massive and Michael Ray has always
been a guy in shape. But I think we start
talking about that immediately. I think people are like, how
do you start these shows? Like what do you talk about?
It's the first thing that I think of when I
see them, and it usually goes from there. And I
got places that I'll maybe go where I never go though.
(00:44):
Is the Ray bus thing?
Speaker 1 (00:45):
Yeah, it's true.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
We got so on and I was going to ask
him about standing Ray up at the bus, and I
think people are going to hear it in this We
got so onto something that was so opposite that it
just felt weird to kind of crash that and start
over there. I feel like you were very strategic in
this interview. I didn't want him to feel uncomfortable because
I wasn't going to go poking after the ex wife
(01:06):
stuff unless he kind of, you know, stuck his head
out of the groundhog out of the hole a little
and be like, hey, I'm willing to talk about it
a little bit. I never want to push anybody into
a place where they're not comfortable. And we danced there
a little bit early in the interview. We got out
and I said, Okay, he's pretty, he's good, and I
didn't want him to say anything that he wouldn't I
(01:28):
don't want to say be proud of saying, but anything
he would regret saying.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:31):
So I was kind of feeling him out there, like
he's not too emotional about it, he's controlled. And so
then we go back to it. We go back to
that well later on. I don't think it's the biggest
takeaway from this, and maybe the most clicks from this,
but I think the biggest takeaway is a guy who
is just trying to be a better person, is trying
to live healthier, had some crap go down, some people die,
(01:54):
a divorce, and he was forcibly help told to get
healthier by himself. I mean, he put himself through it,
so you know, big growth. I think that's the takeaway
here is big growth. But Michael Ray I have not
really spent much time with Mike Corey. We allude to
it in the beginning here. The last time I saw him,
we did a couple operate things together. One of them
(02:14):
was on stage, I remember what he brought up, and
then one of them was we played the opry at
the same time and we were just backstage in the
dressing rooms together. I don't know they even remember that
one he was talking about. The one on stage. I
gave him a plaque. I was just part of the
TV show, and if I'm on camera, I don't even remember.
That's not even real life. So I had to go
back and look at see the picture he was talking about.
But I will say after this, I like the guy.
(02:37):
He's a really nice guy. I liked the guy, and
I think early on I would just see all the
tattoos and I would go, you know, he's sleeved up.
Probably not a guy that I'd like to hang out with.
It's like an ultimate fighter, a guy unfair. I think
I signed some unfair things to him based on that.
But he's always been super nice and had a great
time and then he hung out afterward and we just talked.
(03:00):
Eddie and I were about to work out afterward, me
and him and Klug and Michael. We had just hung
out with like twenty minutes. We worked out and just
you know, talked and I don't know, I liked the guy,
not that I didn't like him, I just didn't know. Yeah,
I was like sleep with one eye open. And then
he you know, Ditsch Ray that time, which we never
got to. So Michael Ray here, follow him at Michael
Ray Music at Michael Ray Official. Can we play a
(03:21):
couple songs this Yeah, he's got this new song called
Spirits and Demons with Meghan Patrick, Spirits and Mombing. He
may at the bottom some songs you may know, think
a little less at number one from March of twenty seventeen,
Bundlings sing in twenty nineteen a number one with one
(03:45):
that Got Away.
Speaker 1 (03:46):
That's all rap, that's okay, She's going to be one
hell of a one that got Away.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
And then last year, which he talked about here, in
twenty twenty two, he had Whiskey and Rain for multip
multiple weeks. Yeah, come in all right, Michael Ray from
Eustas Florida, thirty five years old. He was inspired by
his grandfather, who played music for him, taught him how
to play guitar, and had him perform at Assistant Living centers.
(04:13):
It was very close to his grandfather. That's, you know,
part of the reason he loves the opry so much.
He's played the opry over seventy times. He assigned to
Warner Brothers in Nashville. He's currently on tour till the
end of October, and he has a new EP called
Dive Bars and Broken Hearts that came out on June
twenty third. Here is Michael Ray. Good to see you, man,
you too, Man, I was talking to these guys. I
(04:34):
guess I haven't seen you since backstage is the opry
rhyman opry? Maybe pre pandemic?
Speaker 1 (04:44):
Yeah, it was when actually you gave me my first
platinum plaque that day.
Speaker 2 (04:48):
You know what, Maybe that wasn't I.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
Think it was a regular the opera, the opera. Yeah,
I think that was the last time which has been
a yeah you look jacked, thanks hard? Yeah? Yeah, man,
you know me and out rabble. I was always like
trying to be lean and then like I was like, man,
I want to put some size on, and during the
end of the pandemic, I was like, screwed. We don't
got photo shoots or anything going on. So you can
(05:12):
pack on some weight if you want.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
So.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
Uh now I'm trying to lean back down. I feel
like I got but pack on.
Speaker 2 (05:17):
Way that looks fair because you look jacked. There's a
difference in if I eat a bunch of sugar and
have a crazy water retention and like, so, what what's
the routine? What's the beef up routine?
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Man? I've been I started doing this carnivore diet where
it's pretty much like it's kind of like Keto but
not as like strip. But it's all meat. Uh, all meat,
all meat, Like yeah, like I eat a bunch of steak,
bunch of chicken, bunch of you know, any any any meat, eggs, fruit,
a bunch of my buddies in the UFC. They they
(05:51):
got on and they said they started feeling really good.
And it's so hard me. You know how it is
on the road to try to eat healthy.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
And it's impossible.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
It's impossible, and so at least then it's like, you know,
I don't eat fast food. I try not to. But
if I do have to at least there's something there
I just eat, like the meat.
Speaker 2 (06:05):
It's so hard to not live a regular life but
have regular habits.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
So, and it gets really bad for me when I'm
traveling a lot, if I'm doing a TV show or touring,
because if I'm here and I'm working Monday through Friday
and I'm getting up at this time, I'm going to
bed at this time, and I'm working out everything i
can then do just straight habitual I can commit it's habitual.
But man, you start staying up late or not knowing
(06:32):
where food or not having access to and you're hungry. Yeah,
and you're like, it's just gonna be the bag of
free does it's it?
Speaker 1 (06:38):
But you just got you got to go down and
grocery shop at the little convenient part of the hotel.
We were just in a place some similar thing. Maybe
it was this tiny town and I've been shooting a
TV a second season for Inside the Base on the
Circle Network, and so we're in this little town shooting
stuff with the Coastguard and like there is no uber,
there is no food around there. It's like mom and
pop and it shuts down at seven. It's just a wholesome,
(07:01):
all American little town, you know. So you get there,
you're like, well, I guess it's the chips that we're
doing tonight, you know, So it's all there can Yeah,
that's it.
Speaker 2 (07:08):
And it's also like, you know, growing up how I
grew up, you know, and most people where I come
from are obese or just not healthy because we didn't
have the education of what good food was and everybody
was poor. So to get to eat clan healthy is
kind of a rich person thing, Dude.
Speaker 1 (07:25):
I just said this the other day. My friends of
mine down home, man that that work, you know, bust
their butt, man, and they're the souls provider because the
mom stays at home because it's cheaper for them to
stay at home than it is for them to have daycare. Right,
And man, I got to think about this, I go,
the reason why we have I think some of the
weight issues we have is because you know, I come
from a small town of Florida. It's the same thing, man,
you feed the kid. The kids got to eat, you know,
(07:47):
so feed ten piece a Kentucky fried chicken and so
instead and now it's fourteen dollars for three pieces of chicken. Breasts,
or it's ten dollars for ten pizzas, well, what are
you going to do if you're on? You know, you
got no choice? And uh, and I've told him, I go,
I don't know how people do it. Man, Just for me,
it's two hundred dollars to fifty three hundred dollars just
for me if I'm home for a week.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
Do you go gro This is funny because listen, except
for stopping at a gas station to buy groceries, I
went from being having absolutely no money to having a
lot of money in a relatively quick span where I
didn't have the education to learn about money. So I
went from not knowing about money at all because it's
(08:26):
never around it too, then not knowing at all because
I had to have people helped me with it because
I did have I'm having to pay percentages of people,
and I got agents and managers and I got and
so I was like, oh my god, I don't want
to do it wrong, so please, so I have to.
So my money education kind of came and went quickly.
With that being said, I would like go grocer shopping
at the gas station when I was had no money,
and then when I had all the money. Until recently
(08:47):
my wife has said, Okay, we're going to the grocery store,
and so I go to the grocery store. I'm it's
weird how much groceries cost. And that's a weird thing
to say because I'm so disconnected in that way. And
I was single until I was thirty seven years old.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
Right, yeah, so you're just eating whatever you want, whatever.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
I want, grab go to the I would just literally
any milk, go to the gas station. I get one
thing at a time. That's how it exactly what we do.
And I was gone so much or I would uber
eats it. So until I've only had to start learning
like the real life, like normal human connection. Grocery store stuff. Dude,
it's crazy. After you have a grocery store's stupid.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
It's insane. Bro it just you go to now and.
Speaker 2 (09:23):
To go to Whole Foods.
Speaker 1 (09:24):
Oh yeah, Whole Foods. That's a big flex. Yeah, Whole
Foods is you're you're spending two hundred dollars, you walk
out with nothing's more depressing than you spend the two
hundred dollars and you walk out with like.
Speaker 2 (09:32):
Two bags And I'm not here thing I can't affore.
I want people to be like, oh, listen to Bobby
Waring with no, no, no, I just had no idea. Yeah, dude,
I'm with you, man, I would suck at prices right
right about those games like how much? How much is it?
Speaker 1 (09:43):
Come all down?
Speaker 2 (09:44):
Pine sol and a box is a Hamburger? But about
seventy three dollars?
Speaker 1 (09:48):
Bot?
Speaker 2 (09:48):
You know, two dollars one hundred and fifty.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
I don't know what it is.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
So do you do your own grocery shopping?
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Yeah, whenever I'm home, because I'm only home for a
few days, and so I got a trigger out there
and that's been like something that's really like broad. I
just love it. Man. I've cooked some stuff and like
give it to neighbors and stuff. So it's kind of
like a I don't know, kind of get away, you know.
I go pick up the meat and stuff and I
just grill out at the house for a few days.
So so, like I said, many we're always on the road.
(10:13):
We travel with the grill and stuff, and I try
to grill out there and eat as healthy as a camp.
Like we said, it's tough. So when I'm home, I'm
tried it. It's like a it's like a spa retreat.
When I am home, it's like getting the sauna, split
everything out, and.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
Do you cook you like a sauna?
Speaker 1 (10:27):
Yeah? Yeah, I got an infrared at the house. You know.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
We were just talking about having one of those. My
wife was like, she she will go somewhere with those,
an infrared sauna, and she believes in it. And I
guess I just don't. I guess I haven't spent the
time educating myself on the difference of what an infrared
versus just a hot sauna is. Why do you do it?
Speaker 1 (10:48):
For me? What I found well, so it's it he's
from like the inside, you know, and so there's a
bunch of like of your body or that machine of
the machine. So it's like it's not like a steamer,
you know. And so it's like you're sitting there and
it's slowly you start feeling get hot. And man, dude,
mine's like half the size of the couch that Mike's
sitting on. It's in my garage and you just plug
it in. Man. And what I what I have found
out though, is if you do it consistently for a
(11:10):
few days, you start feeling I start feeling just less
kind of anxious, you know. And I do the cold, cold,
bad thing, and I take cold showers.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
Cold plunch in the morning or just at any time
in the morning. So the one thing that I've been
doing a little bit is my friend and he's also
if I get sick, I call outam.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
Bobo, Oh yeah, bobo yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:30):
So he has irrita. And I've been learning a bit
about inflammation within the body, inside the body, especially with
injuries and walk come to a hell of Well podcast
with Bobby and Michael by the way, but he has
a cryo.
Speaker 1 (11:44):
Oh man, those are awesome.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
And I swear to god, I do it for a
couple of days in a row, and I just feel
better in my joints, even if it's a placebo.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
I wonder how much some stuff of that is. Probably some, I.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
Mean really probably some. But I tell you, after a
couple of days, I really do feel better in my
because of And you get in and it's three and
a half minutes, and you know, you turn on any
song you want, but I actually turn on Bullson Parade.
I do that to get a machine because it's so
freaking cold it is, so I'm just in my underwear
it's like ice blowing on you. That song exactly three
minutes and bull and you know I'm in. I'm focused.
(12:17):
I finish your cold. Your nipples about to break off.
Speaker 1 (12:19):
That's what I was about to say. I feel like
they're like icicles about to just fall off your chest.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
Now that the cryo I get and I love the
infra red, I guess I just haven't.
Speaker 1 (12:27):
Yeah, I think try it. Man tried it a few
days in a row. What I feel the most out
of it is mentally, like I feel more clarity. Yeah,
when I do it in a so I'll wake up
do like fastic cardio all got bow flex bike is
like a peloton that they have. So I do that
and then hop in the sauna for thirty minutes and
then go take a cold shower.
Speaker 2 (12:47):
Did you find yourself like you needed to get on
some sort of mental health physical wellness journey after all
the crap that you've kind of been a part of
the last couple of years, or is this is general
something you've been in for the last six seven years.
Speaker 1 (13:01):
No, it was definitely after that time. After all that
during too, you know, I think I just really leaned
on a lot of people that were, you know, trying
to make healthier choices and healthier habits out of that situation,
and I just really started feeling my man, I feel
when I did those consistently, I felt more clear, I
felt more less anxious. I felt like I could was
(13:22):
making right decisions and navigating, you know, especially that time,
navigating that as well as I could.
Speaker 2 (13:29):
A close friend of mine has gone through public, very public,
something very similar, and listen, I've been through similar. It's
very hard to be a public person going through something private,
and everybody feels like they any way more than they
actually know, and they really don't, but they know more
than they would if you were someone had no notoriety
(13:49):
at all. Yeah and so, and it's also a weird
thing too, because if you volunteer to give people information,
people then expect they can have all the information on
the whole world about you.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
Yeah, it's like, well, you you told us this, so
now we deserve to know more and more and more,
And they get mad and then they insert their on
story if they don't get exactly what they want exactly.
Speaker 1 (14:06):
Yeah and and and it's all you know, we're all
showing everything we can on social media, so like you said,
they feel like they're well, I want to know more
and wanted more about this, and you know, people make
decisions off of headlines that you know aren't true, or
things that are that are twisted or you know, and
I understand, man, like you know, we signed up for
the public side of stuff. But it is tough, man,
It's tough when you're going through something private. People forget
(14:28):
that you're you're human. You know, you're a human being,
you're somebody's son, you're you know. It's it's it's bigger
than you know. It's it's different than than than just music.
You know, there's more to.
Speaker 2 (14:37):
It, and we'll get back to that later on. I
was just thinking about the health and wellness stuff. Let's
talk about music then we bring that up. Megan Patrick.
I love Mega Patrick.
Speaker 1 (14:46):
She's the best man. She's awes didn't.
Speaker 2 (14:48):
Didn't know her, like like if sitting here, I just had.
I had seen her a couple of times. I knew
her from Mitchell a little bit of Mitchell's wife. And
I box at rumble here in town a little bit
and I don't have my glass and I can't see anything.
And I was about to go in and some blonde
girl woman lady can't really tell. It's like, hey, I'm like, hey,
(15:14):
I can't see any it wouldn't matter who it was. Hey,
I'm like, what's up because I don't know who is
it's a listener and I'm like what up? And she's like,
I'm coming over to your house. And I'm like, oh God,
I don't know what you like.
Speaker 1 (15:33):
I don't even drink.
Speaker 2 (15:34):
I don't So she was like Megan Patrick and so
she had a makeup on. She was just a sweats
and megans an athlete too. And I'm like, oh what,
I'm Megan and so she we we said hello, there,
she comes over. We do this. It's awesome. And then
we go and we play golf together in Austin. She
she told me that y'all y'all played.
Speaker 1 (15:53):
Yeah, and we played.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
We hung out for a whole day. So we had
we had had like two and a half days together,
not consecutively, but I just left left those couple of
days going Dan. Megan Patrick's like down, like, oh she's awesome, dude,
just like you want to hang out with her. You
want to be your friend. You want if you're going
to get into a fight, that's what you.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
Want to do. I always jugs to the other day,
I go, I go. If there was like a section
like in the Yearbook where it was like which couple's
gonna probably end up kicking a bunch of people's butt
in a bar fight, and go, Meghan and Timpenny would
be the couple. I put my money off. Now I
think Megan Mitchell and Megan Megan with out a beat
goes It's happened a couple of times.
Speaker 2 (16:28):
Yeah, how do you Megan know each other? How did
you get together? In the song?
Speaker 1 (16:32):
You know, we knew each other just from kind of
seeing you know, we running the same circle and knew
each other for for a while and kind of see
each other like dog House a little you'll get together
as a songwriter events or whatever's what's dog Else. It's
a place on de Mumbrey and by tin Roof, like
they have a bunch of like songwriters rounds and stuff
like that. So just kind of like you I'd see
her and Mitchell out. They had come out on the
you know, everybody gets home on Sunday, so kind of
go out and see everybody. And and I always been
(16:53):
a fan of her stuff. And here in the last
few years. You know, she's from Canada and crushing it
up there. And I started hearing some stuff and and uh,
and I was just saying, like I got the same thing.
When we first hung out with I was like, man,
she's a badass dude like this girls like she's a
she's a real deal and like not afraid to go
up to somebody and go, hey, I'm Megan. You know
what's up? And so we were we would recorded Spirits
(17:16):
and Demons first, and we just used Alison Velt, who's
one of the co writers on it, for the female part.
Speaker 2 (17:22):
So Alison saying in the place that Megan.
Speaker 1 (17:24):
In the place of Megan did yeah, until we found
somebody and so we you know, bounced around and it's always
like do you go outside of the genre, do you
stay in the genre? Who's at the label? I'm signed
to Warner, you know, so who's there that maybe we
could work something with? And started bouncing around and then
her name popped up and I was like, man, yeah,
I love her voice. Man, Like, she's got this strong
you know, she's just it's there. She's powerful, has some
(17:44):
soul and some grit to it. And we sent it
to her and they had just released her EP like
a month Greatest Show, Greatest Show on Dirt. I believe
it was called which is great EP that I love
that song, Greatest Show on Dirt. She agreed to do it,
and dude, she comes in the studio.
Speaker 2 (18:01):
Oh you did it with her?
Speaker 1 (18:02):
Like she did her part. I was there, me and
Michael Knox, who's my producer who produced all Jason Auden stuff.
Megan goes in there and like first take, and I'm like,
look at Knox. I'm like, I don't know. I mean,
I guess if she wants to re sing it, you know,
like let her do it. So she did it a
few times just to have you know, But dude, she
(18:22):
showed up, and she showed up every time and just nails.
We've been able to sing it a couple of times
live and she just crushed it. And it was like
soon as we as soon as we got in the
studio and we heard our voices together, even without any
polish or anything on it. Man, it just fit and
our voices fit real well together. And I'm excited for her, man,
and excited for her that she's a part of it.
I think that it was made.
Speaker 2 (18:42):
For and that's a single, right, we played it before
you got here. That's a single.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
It's just now what we released the day of the EP,
so we haven't picked a true single yet. I think
that's it. I think, so I'm shoot, that's what That's
what I want.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
I mean, I think it's really good.
Speaker 1 (18:56):
Thank you man.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
I was going through the EP and just looking at
some of I'd heard all the songs that I was
going through again just see who had written a bunch
of these songs. The last track Wallen and Hardy and
Josh I was born Jesse Frasier, which is pretty cool.
My favorite part of it though, is the song hate
this Town. So there's a place down here with my
(19:18):
wife and I would go eat all the time. And
this guy it was mask time too, so he just
didn't know what anybody looked like. You know. There were
times after COVID where people I had known for like
a year, I was like, that's your mouth, bro, Like
one way, the other was like that you have a goatee.
Like there are all these things that were discovered, and
(19:41):
that was one of them. I think. So we go
to this and and our waiter, we didn't really know
what his face looked like but every week we would
go and here we'd see him and he's just awesome.
And we knew his name, I knew where he lived,
and like, one of the last times we were there,
I was like, hey, so what's the deal. He says,
it's his last week working there. I said, well, like,
what are you going to do? And he said, man,
(20:01):
I'm about to sign a publishing deal? And I was like,
you're a writer. He'sai, yeah, I'm a writer, I'm an artist.
I said, we've been coming in here for twelve thirteen months.
You never once mentioned that. And I said, first of all,
in a way, that's awesome, cause everywhere, not everywhere, but
a lot of places I go, people will find a
way to either bring it up or bring bring it
to me. Not once did this guy do that. And
(20:24):
I said, well, are you any good? And he was like,
I mean I'm trying to be and so yeah, he
showed me his face. Honestly, I was like, can I
see we haven't in your face yet. We've been with
us forever. He takes his mask off and I was like, dang,
you're actually pretty good looking. And so I was doing
some stand up here at a theater in town, and
I said, hey, you're you've been awesome forever. Once you
(20:45):
come to this show, you and your friend could come
sit of the show. And he's like, oh cool. So
he comes to the show. Well, what he doesn't know
is I've got this thing planned and I say, hey,
will this Our waiter has been here for a while.
He has no idea he's going to get invited up here.
So his name is john the Clawson and he wrote
hate this Town yep, yep, and so and I didn't
put any of it together until I was looking back
(21:07):
through your EP again.
Speaker 1 (21:08):
That's wild, dude, What a what a full circle moment.
Speaker 2 (21:11):
And he came up and he killed. He did not
know he was going to perform. He didn't even have
his guitar. We had Eddie's guitar. He came up and
he crushed. But so Johnny Clawson who was that guy?
Wrote it with Kaylin Roberson and John Wood. But that
song specifically hate this Town? How did it get to you?
Speaker 1 (21:29):
You know? I love writing songs, and I write a lot,
but I also lean on the songwriting community, you know,
and all my heroes cut outside songs, and especially now
more than ever, I feel it's important for us to
lean into that community, you know, with just the way
that music is being bought. You know, there's the revenue
for songwriters isn't what it was when people were buying
tangible albums anymore. And and we're torn so much. Man.
(21:50):
I just I sometimes I just feel like it's best
I just hit my songwriter buddies and go, hey, man,
here's what we're looking for. If you're writing today and
you've you know, got anything in this vein, He's kind
of what we need. Knox actually got this song sent
to him and he put it in our drop box
and I heard it, and I grew up in Florida, man,
where it was southern rock and and you know, I
(22:12):
grew up on a lot of traditional country and and
so it had some of that pieces to it, you know,
and it just I love the I felt like i'd
gone I'd gone through that, you know a little bit.
And I think everybody's gone through that when especially in
a small town where you something has happened, and you
know a lot of times that's a breakup or something
where you never thought that this town would be a
place you wanted to get out of or needed a
break from for a little bit. Uh. And you always
(22:34):
a place that you loved and you went to, but
now there's so many memories too, There's so much going
on that you just need a break from it. I
just felt like we'd all been there and it's a
it's been a fun one to play. Man.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
Let's take a quick pause for a message from our sponsor. Wow,
and we're back on the Bobby Cast.
Speaker 2 (22:57):
You feel like you've aged a lot in the past
five years.
Speaker 1 (23:00):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
Do you feel like you have a lot of advice
now that you wouldn't have been able to give that
now you can give.
Speaker 1 (23:05):
Oh, I feel like a grandpa.
Speaker 2 (23:07):
There was a time to in my career. Yeah, where
I went. I've been through some real crap now and
for the first time I have somebody said, hey, can
you help me Mandy's advice?
Speaker 1 (23:14):
I'd be like, yep, I sure can and have Yeah, yep, absolutely, man.
Speaker 2 (23:17):
And it takes challenge, It takes going through challenges to
actually be understand why you're grateful for stuff too. Absolutely,
it gives you a new perspective.
Speaker 1 (23:26):
Yeah, man. And and you just have no other choice.
It's like you get everybody's life's going to have ups
and downs. But I believe, especially now man, that no
matter if it's the up or the down, it's all
part of the purpose to get you where you're going
to be, you know, and who you're supposed to be.
And sometimes having that wake up or having that jerk,
you know, just oh my god, life altering something happening
(23:47):
is what makes a lot of people reassess everything, you know,
and then you're in that fork in the road where
you go, Okay, well do I go this way? Do
I go this way? And either you know, and now
all of a sudden you got a clear mind because
you went through all this. And the Rocky movies are
my favorite ever, and so I always tell people on
my dude at the end, it was like Adrian, we
he's all beat up, you know, but he did it.
You know, he's a champion. It's like going through those
(24:09):
things I used to always, you know, my one of
my biggest problems was showing vulnerability. You know, I grew
up in a divorced home, a lot of fighting, you know,
a lot of verbal abuse, a lot of you know,
I was always in different places all the time, and
and so I never wanted people to see that side
I never wanted people think the bad of yeah. Yeah,
(24:31):
and so I always wanted I just never showed vulnerability.
Always try to keep that wall up, you know, And
it's exhausting. It's what I found out through the year.
So my parents got divorced when I was eight, and
then do you remember them together a little bit? I
remember one Christmas and it was a Christmas where we
grew up in this double white trailer on ten Acres
(24:51):
and my family donated. My family started the first fire station.
Speaker 2 (24:55):
In your town.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
In that town, yeah, uh, in that area, is it,
like what Eustace? Yeah, And so my grandfather, my grandmother
started that and that was at the front end of
our acreage, and everybody kind of lived all our family
lived pastors apart, you know. And so I remember one Christmas.
I don't other than that, very little, very little memories.
And it's weird how me and my little sister talks
(25:16):
about it. It's weird how you block out a lot
of things, you know. And when you look back at
my childhood, I'm like, man, there's some I don't There's
like years I'm like, where did what do we do?
Like it's just like kind of gone, did.
Speaker 2 (25:27):
Your my parents had divorced on five or six, and
I can remember barely them before my biological dad left,
just barely, right, and so I do have like this shred.
But then my biological dad was never around. I never
saw him ag until I was almost thirty six, thirty
seven years old. Did your mom and dad are they
(25:48):
still alive? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (25:48):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (25:49):
And did they remain in the same town. Did you
have a relationship with both of them? Did you go
back and forth?
Speaker 1 (25:55):
Yeah? Yeah, I did, and they they you know, my
mom was from you to there. She's from Tallahassee. But
when Ustic's high school moved down there when she was
grown up, and she grew up in a real tough
environment to you know, abused and divorced home and kind
of split and so luckily, I mean that the one
thing they did do right is they kept me and
my sister together. You know, even though I live with
(26:17):
my dad and my sister lived with my mom. Our
weekends were at the same time, you know, unless I
was playing music with my grandpa or whatever, then I
was out with him. But yeah, and that what what
was tough though, And it was tough bro until not
that long ago. Was my mom and my dad.
Speaker 2 (26:31):
Their relationship was so tumultuous.
Speaker 1 (26:33):
Yeah yeah, yeah. I mean we to a point where
I was like, man, listen, I can't put somebody over
here and somebody. You know, I didn't ask for any
of this, you know, I was we were I was eight,
my sister was six. Like, we didn't ask for any
of this, you know, like both of y'all remarried and separated.
You know. Let's you know, also, I need you to
look at it as I know you got some personal
stuff there. But that's my dad and that's my mom.
(26:55):
So I you know, imagine.
Speaker 2 (26:56):
You have these conversations with them. That's a that's a
tough conversation to be the kid and the adult.
Speaker 1 (27:01):
It's tough, man, It's tough, and it's and it's a
weird thing too. Is. I feel like in life there
is that switch where it starts we all of a sudden,
your parents are like my mom is you know, call
me and my sister and my dad's calling us for advice.
And I'm like, when did this happen? You know what
I mean? Like when did we become the I'm like, Dad,
what are you doing?
Speaker 2 (27:17):
Bro?
Speaker 1 (27:17):
You can't do you know you can't do that, or Mom,
don't you know? And uh, it is, it's it's weird, man.
But I wasn't confident in doing that until I went
to I did my first ever. I never really done
therapy before. And uh, there's a group of guys and
a guy named Al here in Nashville that has helped
a lot of artists out and him and a guy
named Miles.
Speaker 2 (27:36):
And so I've been on site, so that's okay, yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
No, but I went to a place in Arizona that's
like yeah, and so it was dude, I won't mention
because we obviously got to keep things of private in
those things. But I go to Arizona, right, This is
this was a this is such like a god like
universe moment of just like humbleness but also what people
think our lives are, you know, from the Instagram or
from a social media whatever they've made in their hip. Bro,
(28:03):
I go to Arizona for therapy seven days intense. I
mean it was, like the guy told me, because you
pretty much went from not driving a car to the
Daytona five hundred, right, and h I go in there
and known exactly what dude, I just started feeling like
I was getting angry, started feeling I was getting some
traits that people in my family had and I wasn't
being able to control them. And I was like, I'm
I want to nip this in the butt. I've always
(28:24):
felt since I was a kid, I was a guy
that was going to change my family's path. And I
started seeing those things pop up, and you know, all
of a sudden, my anger or this shit that's not me,
you know, and I'm like, we got to do something.
And h somebody at a friend of mine at the
label reached out to al and aw hook me up
at this place. And first person I meet when I
walk in, their first person in my group, it's from Franklin,
(28:44):
tonnes site.
Speaker 2 (28:45):
Really you had to go random Arizona, Random Arizona.
Speaker 1 (28:49):
And it even better, I do.
Speaker 2 (28:50):
Do you see at the wy Yeah, Steve, what are
you doing here?
Speaker 1 (28:53):
B So I thought maybe I'd get out and it'd
be you know, no one would know, and it would
just be you know, me and a bunch of people
in a group. And it was when I want to
I'm driving to my first day park, get a call
from my management, Hey, congratulations, whiskey and rain went number
one A week early. It looks like you're about to
have your first two week number one. And it was
(29:13):
already right to go, about to go platinum. I just
pulled into therapy. I'm sitting in the parking lot, get
this call, dude, And it was just this rush of
emotions because I think I didn't realize, you know, coming
from the South, coming from you don't talk about stuff.
Speaker 2 (29:27):
Therapy was not a thing for what people did, what
rich people did on TV. Yeah, and there were shrinks
and that's just not for us because we got to
worry about eating, not going to have mental health jet yeah,
or are you looking?
Speaker 1 (29:37):
You go, I'm not paying you one hundred and fifty
dollars an hour to talk to you. You know, I'll
go and do this or I'll go whatever. And all
douz is just push it down and push it down.
And at some point it's like filling up a five
gallon bucket. You know, it only can hold five gallons,
you put five and a half. Half of it's falling out,
you know. And so I think it's what we do
as humans. We just push it down, push it down,
push down, and then it comes out in an angry
way or in a way that you grew up that
(29:59):
all of a sudden you're like, oh, wow, why did
I just say that, you know? Or why did I
just do that?
Speaker 2 (30:03):
It's funny you were seeing some of those traits that
you didn't want to have that maybe you had seen
though as a kid in yeah, and you to even
acknowledge to even have the where it's all to go, oh,
I see this, Yeah, I don't like it. Yeah, because
sometimes I'll have these but I don't I can't notice.
I don't have the capability to go oh. Some of
(30:23):
my wife would be like, hey, just so you know,
you're spiraling, and I'm like, oh, you're right.
Speaker 1 (30:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (30:28):
The fact that you could see it in yourself, like
that's that's pretty mature.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
Yeah, I mean it was. It was. I think I
just those are the memories I have growing up of
some of those you know, holes punched in walls and
you know, all of that stuff that I never did that,
but it was like those little things where I was like, oh,
that's close. And then I also had a my mom's sister.
Not to get all down, but my mom's sister took
her own life around just before that time, and I
(30:54):
remember sitting at the service, and for the first time
ever before I went into the therapy, like I literally,
dude could sit on my count and this is not me,
Like I'm up in the morning at the gym, like
I try to like live every second I can. And Dude,
for months, man, I couldn't get off the There'd be
days where I just didn't literally no, no, should just
checked out and numb Laurie like I could. I'd look
(31:15):
at that water bowl and go, man, I'm thirsty and
sit there for ten hours, you know, and I had,
and I could, and I'd break out of it for
a little bit, but then I'd go out, you know,
and then I'd come back and isolate. And that was
my problem, is isolation. And I realized that once stuff
get bad, I just removed myself from the stuff.
Speaker 2 (31:31):
I do the same thing.
Speaker 1 (31:32):
And it's tough, man, And it's from friends, you know,
people calling you, people hitting you up, and and luckily, man,
I got a good group of guys around me. You know.
Brandley Gilbert was one of them that called me and
was like, hey, get in that jeep, get your ass
down to my house for a few days and come
hang out, you know. And so it was all these things.
I started realizing, I'm like, I don't like the fact
that I feel like somebody's driving the ship and I'm
(31:53):
looking at it.
Speaker 2 (31:54):
Did they were you diagnosed as being clinically depressed when
you were started going to therapy?
Speaker 1 (31:57):
All right? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (31:58):
Or were you just like going that I was depressed?
Speaker 1 (32:00):
Uh no, They told me that because I had to go.
So what it ends up happening? They said that when
your body has so much going on that there's two
ways that it reacts, right, and it's either this hyperactive
thing where that's the nervous people that are you know,
or it's like paralyzed. And they're like, that's what you
fighter flight. Yeah, it's fight or flight exactly. Yeah. And
so that's pretty much what I was what I was
dealing with, you know. And then and then what's what's
(32:22):
more messed up about that situation is in your mind,
you're like, why am I doing this? I know I
shouldn't be doing this. Why am I not answering this call?
Why am I not doing this whatever? But it's like
your body's not It's like I can't go. I want
to grab that book, but like someone's holding me down,
you know, And it was the weirdest thing. So I
think all of that and then starting to notice like
(32:43):
anger and the different things I didn't like seeing growing up.
And like I said, I always felt like I was
a guy that was meant to change the path of
my my family, and and I just wanted to wanted
to change it, man. And luckily, you know, somebody at
Warner stepped in, and a lot like your wife, you
know something we need people like you need your wife,
And those situations where it's like, hey, Bobby, because I
love you.
Speaker 2 (33:03):
And I'm always irritated and you don't even understand. You
don't even know what I mean, what I've been through.
And then it's like after like after she tells me
this and I have an hour, I'm like, god, dang,
she was right. She was right. And sometimes she tells
me this and I'm like, you don't even and in
my mind be going, She's been right the other right time.
So still I'm like, you don't even know. It's like
I cannot stop the cycle of telling her she's wrong
(33:25):
when she's always right.
Speaker 4 (33:27):
The Bobby cast will be right back, Welcome back to
the Bobby Cast.
Speaker 2 (33:39):
I just think, are we have parallel paths here in
a lot of ways, from where we come from, the
culture that we were in, what we were exposed to,
what the people in our towns did. I'm from a
very hard working mill town. Like that's work. You go
and you work, and then you have a few hours
in the evening and then you go to sleep and
you go to work again.
Speaker 1 (33:57):
Right.
Speaker 2 (33:58):
And so for me, I always been so scared to
have kids because I don't want to make that mistake
that my biological father did, which he was just gone.
I don't I don't know him now met him. We
don't hate him anymore, but we don't have a relationship.
You coming from where you come from, does that concern
you at all with having children? Because again you can
(34:20):
sit and have the understanding of I'm going into these patterns.
Does that Does it concern you that you would do
that as a dad?
Speaker 1 (34:26):
No, because I wanted to break that before that ever happened,
you know, before I ever have a family. I didn't
want that to be my first reaction. And so because
I feel, I really feel what you're saying, because I've
always kind of battled that too, of like do I
want to have kids? What if I repeat this process.
That's my fear, you know. And if I repeat it
(34:47):
and I don't even know I'm going down that rabbit,
that pattern, I don't see it, and all of a
sudden boom, I look up and I'm in it. You know,
this is not what I wanted. And now I'm dragging
a kid through. You know what I went through and
all that as hell, Man, you don't want I would
never want to do that. But then there's also a
part of me, man, and I think over the last
couple of years, it just really made me feel like
there's a bigger purpose in life, and that's something I
(35:10):
want to I hope to experience one day.
Speaker 2 (35:11):
You know, when you were at and we'll just call
it your therapy camp, that's what I called. I was
at a pretty bad place where i'd have any connections, Like,
I didn't feel true connections with people. I was just numb.
Instead of drinking because I don't drink. I've never drank
because of my biological debt. They all drink, so I've
(35:33):
never drank. But what I would do is I would
just work just the same thing. Just you just find
something to consume yourself with so you don't feel other things.
And that's what I was doing all the time, all
the time, all the time. And so I had a
couple different friends and I said their names. I don't
think they would care, and it's not a name drop,
but just to acknowledge how important they were at the time.
Dave Haywood, Oh yeah, he's one of the sweetest guys
(35:54):
from Lady, A very analytical guy but also super creative.
And he was like, hey, man, you're having to run
your own crap and you're also having to like be
creative and think and and you know, come up with
these ideas at the same time you're managing folk. He
was like, if you thought about on site and I
want to go some therapy, I mean, I'd go to therapy,
but I'm not going on something hoity toty therapy. Yeah,
(36:15):
what am I going to live for?
Speaker 1 (36:16):
As I feel that was the same way man.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
And so he's like, just think about it. I said, okay, okay.
Nicole Galli and I talked to me about it a
little bit because Nicole and myself and Ross Kaufran had
done this secret writing project together. We'd written all these
songs and did it under a fake name, and so
we did, and and then it was honestly, Tyler Hubbard
and I had got into a huge fight. A couple
of them. They had like come at me randomly, and
then we'd always like get on the phone and he'd
(36:41):
yell at me, I'd yell at him, and then we'd
be like cool again. And we went to have coffee
once and he was like, bro, you need to go
out to Osie. That's my best tiler of impression. And
I was like, really because he had helped me complete it,
and so it was freaking Tyler.
Speaker 1 (36:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (36:54):
Who And We've been up and down in our relationship
for my whole time I've been here, but it was
definitely one of those places we were good. He was like,
it would really help you because I think Tyler and
I very I think that's probably why we but had
sometimes two were very similar.
Speaker 1 (37:06):
Yeah, he's at workaholic too.
Speaker 2 (37:08):
That guy stop very similar. So I trusted him and
I went and there was an entire group that was together,
and then there was me and some of the folks
that were like, you won't want to get in a
group because people are gonna know who you are and
you're gonna worry that they're going to be telling folks
stuff off your show. So I did I think six days,
five or six days of eight hours a day.
Speaker 1 (37:27):
One on one on one, one on Oh.
Speaker 2 (37:30):
I hadn't cried in years, and I remember telling the
lady that same therapist, that same therapist every day.
Speaker 1 (37:35):
Right, Oh my goodness. I'm like, that's heavy.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
I don't cry. I wish I could cry. I'm like
a bathtub that hasn't been unclothed.
Speaker 5 (37:42):
Yeah, and it's got like hair in and the waters
like green. There's maybe some book. And she was like, well,
I'm not going to force you to cry, but at
some point it's gonna happen.
Speaker 2 (37:53):
Day one, Nope, Day two. Note a couple of things
happened day three. Day four. We did this thing where
you put like a scarf on it and you talk
to it. It's the scarf like reminds you of one
of your relevant Dude, Yeah, it's my grandma who raised me.
Speaker 1 (38:05):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (38:05):
So she's like, talk to your grandma.
Speaker 1 (38:07):
Boom bude, just gone.
Speaker 2 (38:10):
And I couldn't from then on for the next couple
of days, I could not not cry. Yeah, because once
it hit and it was the biggest breakthrough I've ever had.
Speaker 1 (38:19):
Mine was I and Ed m R. Yeah done that too,
That was mine, dude. Mine and I went there very
and it was funny cause it's a very similar thing.
They were like, do you want to do the group whatever?
And I was like, I don't want to stay there,
so I gotta I got a place next to it.
But I was like, I'll I think in my mind
it was like I just I'll do whatever I got
to do to get out of this, right, and so
just where I need to go, let's go, let's do it,
(38:40):
and I'll be a part of all of it. So
the first day I get there and they're doing the group,
which is like, you know, everybody's saying there's strangers in there,
like they're saying what they're there for, and like some
people were there for, like I mean, they're really going
through stuff, you know, And it gets I'm like last,
and everybody's saying and I'm like, then what am I
going to say? I'm a little mad, you know, like
I've got to going through some anger issues like this
guy's like his family's falling apart, you know, and I'm
(39:01):
like and so I just stood up there and I
was like, hey, I don't really know how to say this.
I go, this is my first time doing this, I said,
but and I debated on if I want to do this,
and I schod. But Michael Roach is my actual name,
Michael Ray is a stage name or whatever you want
to call it. I go, I'm a country artist. I go,
here's why I'm here. Blah blah blah. I go, And I,
oddly enough have the number one song in country radio
(39:23):
right now. And this guy I'll never forget. He was
sitting over there, and he was an older guy. And
after the group, he comes up to me and that
kind of opened up everybody and then all of a sudden,
everybody starts talking a little bit more. And now that group, dude.
By day two, day three, we were like we're in
a group text, you know, and like really leaning on
each other. And the one guy had been in therapy
quite a bit throughout his life, and he was in
his late sixties, mid sixties, and he told me, he's like, man,
(39:45):
he goes, you come in here in your early thirties.
He goes, you won't go through what I've had to
go through. You know, you're doing it now. And and
we would do the group and then we would do
a few sessions one on one and then group, and
there's a few sessions and the group we had to
do those where you set the hear up. And it
was that same exact thing to me, man, And it
was like, my grandpa died two weeks before my first
(40:09):
single came out, and three days before my house a
blue show where all the in Orlando we sold out,
all radios comeing, they Warner brought everybody in. He passed
away two days before that. And then and then he
was supposed to be the opry and me and him.
That's how I learned it all. Three weeks after he passed,
I get an email, Hey, pick your opry date, and
I'm like, you know, And so I didn't realize that
(40:32):
I was in the radio tour. So what did I do?
I go honor my grandfather at the show. That's what
he'd want me to do. Show goes great. I said,
as guitar that he played for forty fifty years up
there had a light on it, went to the service,
wrote us a bituary, did everything right back out on
the road. And I did that every time someone passed away.
Didn't mourn never, never, Really, I'm mourned in that moment.
Speaker 2 (40:52):
But not you didn't. You didn't have time to like
natally and yeah, and I just.
Speaker 1 (40:56):
Left, you know. And then and then I realized I
did that E M D R DMR whichever. Someone messed up.
But dude, that was why I went, like, I didn't
know anything about that stuff. But many this one they
put these prongs in your hand like vibes, and I'm
closed my eyes and I'm talking. And one of the
craziest things do that happened on the last day. She
(41:17):
goes to you, she goes, what do you see now?
And I go, I see my grandparents in there in
that door, And I said, my grandma's wearing this white
shirt with like some stuff like embroidery on it. But
she's not old. She's like in her fifties, see on forties.
I said, she's got these coke bottle big glasses on
they used to wear in the nineties, and her hair
prin druss and my grandpa's wearing a blue polo shirt.
I describe everything right, And then it hits me. I
(41:40):
have that photo in my phone, in an old photo,
and they were standing there, man, and it was just
it was And then again, they tell you to talk
to them it, which sounds so crazy when you're talking
right now.
Speaker 2 (41:51):
You know, it sounds crazy to even start doing it.
But once you start, oh dude, then you're like.
Speaker 1 (41:55):
It's like a baptism. Bro. It's like it's like you're
you just you know, bro, you know, I'm bubble ugly crying.
And it was like that man, I told him, I
go if that's the only reason I came, like I
felt like this massive. I feel like God just put
a took his hand and pulled the way off, you know.
But it's because al and then got me into that place,
and I know how because of Tyler and all them.
(42:17):
So it's kind of a weird yeah, weird circle.
Speaker 2 (42:19):
But you know, I guess I never cried. There was
a little shame for me and crying, not because there
was any sort of masculinity, like men don't cry. I
didn't have a male influence really, right, my dad was gone,
but I didn't even call my dad. But for the
sake of this, my biological I was gone. I had
a head football coach who was a father figure ish
as much as you can be when it's not even
your kid. Very much disciplined, how a youth director who
helped but never had a dad, so it was very missed.
(42:40):
So my not crying was never oh I can't, men
don't cry. It was like, people already think I'm weak
and I'm already the charity case, so I'm not gonna
cry because I can't show weakness because they already think
I'm weak. So it was never a masculinity thing, but
it was a shame in being not as much. I
didn't feel like people would feel like I had value.
(43:02):
So I have trouble crying. And even the first time
I started crying in therapy, I was just so embarrassed.
Oh yeah, I was just like, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
She was like, great, why are you sorry? And I
was like, no, no, I shouldn't be doing this. And
I still struggle with that, but that was a big
part of that for me, was just crying and not
apologizing for it.
Speaker 1 (43:21):
Yeah, And I think people grew up like we did.
Sorry is our first go to. Yeah, I apologize. I'm like,
why did I just apologize? Sometimes I'm sorry? It's like
just comes out. And I think it's because growing up, man,
you know, my dad was a paramedic firefighter too for
twenty something years, and so the PTSD that he never
got taken care of until later on in his career. Dude,
(43:43):
that I mean it made growing up sometimes hell, you know.
Speaker 2 (43:46):
And he probably didn't even know why he was being
affected in ways he was being affected.
Speaker 1 (43:50):
Dude. He would wake up in the mill of the night.
And I remember one that some of the craziest stuff,
manbe I was like eight or nine. My parents got divorced,
and I was at my grandparents' house and I stayed
a lot with them, and my grandpa was, you know,
teach me chords on the guitar, and I was always
over there. He would call it like two in the
morning and my grandpa coming, hey, wake up, say hey
your dad. I'm like, hey, hey, you good? Yeah? All,
(44:11):
I love you. And that'd be it. Later on in life,
I'd ask my dad later on as an adult, I'm like, hey, man,
why would you call us like two in the morning,
you know where we were at? And he goes, Man goes,
because I just worked a call on an eight year
old who God had the same here you know everything,
And it was like and then the dude, these these
men and women are trained to literally me and you
go see horror I mean a horror movie in real life,
(44:35):
take it to the hospital, do all this stuff, and
then go you good, Yeah, all right, Hey, we're we're
back in yeah, or go eat a sandwich, you know,
And they push it back in here because they have to.
That next call might be right as soon as they
call in. That next call might be the exact same
or worse, or it might be some you know, an
older lady slipping fella needs help picking up, or it
could be what you just saw. And so he all
he never got help for that. He never talked to
(44:56):
anybody and did it. We did. Just came out in anger.
He was pissed off because of you know, stuff that
he had gone through, and it was over controlling and
just a lot of like you know, a lot of
just got whatever can stop the fighting, I'll do.
Speaker 2 (45:08):
That's heavy stuff that I don't think that I think
about enough either. With the jobs military, I understand, I
don't even understand, but like I understand that I don't understand,
like I stand with it. But yeah, even like a
paramedic you're just see or a police officer. Yeah, man
aside from the possibility of you dying by some bad
dude killing you. Just what you're seeing by going to Rex,
(45:29):
like like, that's some traumatizing stuff.
Speaker 1 (45:31):
Yeah, man, Or hearing like the screams of somebody that's
pulling up to a scene and they don't know if
their loved one's okay. You know, it's just I mean,
I and there's a lot that I didn't understand obviously
growing up, I'm like, why is my dad this way? Yeah,
and it was. He made it made a lot of
things really tough. But as you get older, I think
you have empathy. You know. Also when I went to there,
but we did this like family tree thing. Dude, when
you look at it written up, you're like, man, we've
(45:52):
been screwed up for generations.
Speaker 2 (45:53):
This is generations total pull.
Speaker 1 (46:00):
But yeah, it was. So I think that made me
have a little more empathy. And then he went and
got taught to somebody really figured out, you know, man,
you got to you gotta get this stuff straighten out
because it's getting where it's hard to live with you,
you know. And so I think I think him just
going through that stuff really caused it to be harder.
And then because of that, it was all, there's so
much fighting all the time that I would just a
(46:22):
people pleased. And that was one of the things I
brought with me into my adult life, I guess, which
made stuff really hard. And you're like, yeah, i'll do
this yet, and then you're panicking because you add too
much stuff to your plate. Now you got all this
stuff going on. So I think the saying I'm sorry
or the people pleasing all this stuff guys like you
and I where we grew up. Man, it's just it's
it just comes out. You know, I'm crying, I'm sorry.
Who are you started for?
Speaker 2 (46:41):
I feel like you have so much perspective, and perspective's
hard to get because you never want to have to
get it because for you to have to get perspective
means a lot of things didn't go right. But it's
also like the most valuable thing. Perspective and empathy are
like the most valuable things you could possibly own, but
you can't own them if you don't do the work
or go through the crap to get on Yep. Yeah,
I feel like at this point in your life you
have had to develop so much perspective, yeah, man, and
(47:03):
understanding what would you do differently if you could go back,
because I feel like a little bit this is I
don't know you that well. You know, I've spent a
couple of months. I don't know your ex at all,
so I have no I know nothing. What would you
have done differently with that whole relationship? Would you have
slowed it down a little bit?
Speaker 1 (47:22):
Yeah? You know, I think too, if I'm being honest,
I think being really the only true thing I ever
knew about love or marriage was my grandparents, or my
aunt and uncle, my gun uncle, my dad's brother him
and my aunt Kim. They'd met when they were fifteen
and fourteen, and that was it for the rest of
their life, you know, until my uncle passed away. And
(47:43):
so those are the only two things. And I always going, man,
I want that. Or I'd go to my friend's house,
you know, and i'd see them and their family or whatever,
and there was none of the at least obviously when
you're over there, they're not showing you what's really happening.
But I think, you know, I can't speak for her,
but I think from it was like, man, look at
all this going right, I think she was, you know.
(48:04):
I also we weren't around each other a lot, and
we're both touring arts. Yeah, man, and so you got
the one day and that you're trying to cram it
in to see each other and do what you know,
and you're packing and you know you're out again. And
so I probably would have slowed things down. I wouldn't
have been so influenced by I think the people, you know,
fans being involved in it, and you know, to be honest,
(48:26):
I think I knew in the beginning or around that time,
that this was something we probably should have slowed down.
Speaker 2 (48:33):
If I could go back, I would not have exposed
my wife to the public as early as I did.
And we still waited a while, but I was like,
you know, I lived my life very openly. She never
really had an interest in being exposed. Right, exposed is
a weird word, but just like, you know, really just
exposing people, because it really made it hard, really hard
(48:55):
for her because she that's not her favorite thing is
to be public. She's not trying to be an influencer.
That's not her life. She's very family oriented, not trying
to be famous. But what I did by doing it earlier,
I think it came on so hard and strong for her.
It was a it was a negative, and she was like,
I don't like this very much, and I already already
(49:16):
didn't love it, So I'm just gonna kind of take
another half step back where I wish I would have
just waited a little longer in that What was that
conversation like for you guys, like, Okay, are we going
to do this? Because I would also think if I
were you guys, I would love the attention because two together.
Speaker 1 (49:32):
Oh dude, I mean, I mean, listen, I'm not gonna lie.
Speaker 2 (49:34):
Yeah, it's the greatest thing ever.
Speaker 1 (49:35):
It's cool as shit, you know when you want, you know,
and you see Tim and Faith and you know Garthatricia,
and you know, we were both coming up kind of
at the same time, her and I. So it was
like it wasn't like one was over here and the
other one was, you know, first starting out, it was
like we're kind of right there at you said, So
it was a lot to celebrate. But yeah, I mean, yeah,
it's it's yeah, I'm not gonna lie do it is
It's a lot of.
Speaker 2 (49:55):
A lot of perks come with you flatch some of
the toughness, honestly, like all three hundreds, like look, at
these two. I don't want to say names. I'm not
gonna bring her name up because it's not but it's like,
look at these two together, because sometimes when you put
two together, it's.
Speaker 1 (50:08):
Bigger than the absolutely man then the two individual lead. Yeah.
And one thing too that we didn't like, we didn't
do counseling. We didn't do any of that before. And
I think that and there was moments that I look
back now and I'm like, why didn't I speak up
on that? Like that was one of the first times
I realized her and I are opposite, you know, and
I'm a very much more extroverted, you know person, and
(50:32):
she's not. And so there was a lot of different things.
I come from a big family that, you know, everybody helped.
My cousins had keys on my dad's you know, we
used to just go we'd go and we wouldn't have
food at the house, and we'd go just go to
my uncle's house and we'd be in there cooking. They
weren't even home, you know, Like it was just that,
you know, So there were little things that I think
if we would have done that, I think we would
have seen that, oh, this isn't We're when when you
(50:54):
do have the two at the same time and it's
even the same business and it's all the eyes are
on you, it's very easy to keep that Hey everything's good,
even when you're home, you know, and you're really not
going you're really not addressing issues, you're not really knowing
each other. Honestly, it's just like, hey, we're here for
twenty four hours and I kind of got to do
(51:14):
this meeting. I do just this meeting. You going to
do dinner at five? Cool? You know, And I don't
think we really just realized that, man, this is we're opposite.
Speaker 2 (51:23):
At one point on the internet, did you go, I
can't read this. I can't look at this up anymore
because one it's either not fear not true, or it's
just overwhelming for me to see.
Speaker 1 (51:30):
Yeah, I uh yeah, I thought for a while, I
went I went dark for a little bit, just because
there was there was so much that isn't true, and
there's so much that was twisted, and it was just
like out of nowhere, everybody's just like, oh, look what
he did. I'm like, well, what are you talking about? Like,
first off, none of y'all were around, you know, for
(51:51):
three years and you don't know anything that happened. You
just know what this headline on what she has said.
And because I don't believe in throwing shade at her
or any of that stuff. We were both learning and
growing up. And I'm not trying to ruin what she's
trying to go into. If she wants to, you know
what I mean, she gets another relation, I don't. I
don't want to ruin any of that. I don't want,
(52:11):
you know, I hope she has the best success and
does everything that she wants. I'm not trying to make
this this you know, beef. Yeah, between us two, Like listen,
both of us dropped the ball in a lot of ways.
And that's the truth, you know, And so we I
didn't show up after, you know, the wedding day because
by that point in time, there was a lot of
stuff that she did show up for and it was
just kind of like there's stuff that happened that day
where I was like, I'm out, you know. And and
(52:34):
again I never went to therapeut and never did any
of this stuff. So it was just I had all
this stuff built up, and then I think the fear
of am I repeating this process? What did I do
what about you know, and so all of that kind
of just it was a lot, man. It really took
its toll, and I think just we just didn't we
showed up at two different times. And then then to
(52:55):
to kind of go back to where you're asking about
the comments, I had to I had bought my tongue
a lot, man, because I was your restraint.
Speaker 2 (53:03):
Yeah, top notch, just having a restraint period. Even if
every comment was right or wrong, I would have just
been in the mix. Yeah, it would have been completely
unhealthy and for me, and i'd have been but I'd
have been in it, and I'd made myself worse. But
you never You didn't say anything. He didn't put a
song out, you didn't get in the comments. I mean,
I don't know how. I don't know how you did
it if you had good people in your ear.
Speaker 1 (53:25):
Yeah, yeah, you know, I think a lot my management
team who was helping me a lot during that time also, Man,
I just realized too. I went home, I went to Eustless, Florida,
and stayed at my uncle and ant's house and they're
downstairs and hung with family. And it was at that
COVID time where no one was working we weren't toaring
it was. It was Florida, so it was open, you know,
(53:45):
Florida we were doing. Never got Florida, never got COVID
yet stopped at the Georgia line. Yeah. So dude, I
think I just got re and retouched with your roots, man,
because you know, I mean, like you were saying, we're
all over the place all the time, and it's very
easy to get disconnected. And I think I was during
that ang that that was when I started seeing some
(54:06):
of that anger start popping up. And then I went
from oh, you won't say that, Okay, Well now the
trailer park uses Florida kick comes out, you know, and
I'm like I'm ready to fight, and I'm like, what
do you say? You don't know anything about this, And
so I was like, I need to go home, chill
with my mom, you know, with my buddies, fish with
my cousin, just do stuff that we did and just
(54:26):
reconnecting and push that all away and not even not
even look at it.
Speaker 2 (54:30):
It had been hard to even listen to the radio though,
because you're on all of a sudden, you hear a
song about you and you're like, mother, oh yeah, I.
Speaker 1 (54:37):
Just embraced that. I just turned it up. Good for you. Yeah,
I was like, screw it up, man, let's go.
Speaker 3 (54:42):
Let's take a quick pause for a message from our sponsor.
This is the Bobby Cast.
Speaker 2 (54:54):
Did you write songs that you'd never put out?
Speaker 1 (54:56):
Yeah, yeah, there's a couple. I wrote one with my
buddy John Saderfield and John Stone that might put out
at some point, but it's not. It was mainly just honestly,
I don't I don't think I actually will. Because we
were on my bus one day and they came out
to write, and I was just like, man, because everybody
kept asking he gonna write a song, you know, just
I was like.
Speaker 2 (55:13):
No, because everybody felt like they would have backed. I mean, honestly,
we're all like, yeah, wow, like he's it's going hard
on him? True, not true. We don't know. I don't
know your relationship. I don't know what happened. But it's like, god, dang,
there's like six songs in every song about you, like,
how's he not respect FONDI.
Speaker 1 (55:29):
Yeah, and that was, you know, I mean I think
she could have gone a different way of that, and
I think it was you know, I think you know, also,
I don't think people realize we we both we grew
up and broken broken homes. We know people from our
hometown Sadly, in small towns, broken homes is more common
than ever. Now. I know how hard a divorce can be.
I've seen it, seen it when my parents have seen
(55:49):
it with buddies of mine. I got friend of mine
with four kids. He's hundreds of thousands of dollars and
still fighting. You know, in there, it's just wow, it's hell.
We didn't own anything together. We both prenups. I haven't
seen her, spoken to her in three and a half years.
I went my way, she went hers vorce paper sent
to my manager's office. I signed them, got sent to
her business manager's office. She signed them. That was it.
Speaker 2 (56:12):
That's clean.
Speaker 1 (56:13):
That was clean. It's c There's not this like And
I'm not downplaying anything, and I'm not downplaying Hardbury, what
anybody goes through, or any of that. But when you
look at what my problem was, why are we trying
to make a financial gain on something that is not
what is being portrayed? You know, when I see friends
of mine that have gone through hell and back, you know,
on both sides of the fence, man process of a divorce,
(56:34):
the process through the fighting back and forth. I'm like,
you know, yes with ours was public. Yes there is
some answers to fans, Like you said, they feel like
they needed and a we let them in, so you
got to you know. But on the on the whole thing,
I was like, man, this isn't as what This isn't
what people think it was, you know, and it was
as clean as it could be. It was a breakup
(56:54):
with paperwork. I hate that it happened. No one gets
married to get divorced. I It's something that haunted me
for years, you know, made me mad at myself, made
me you know, you over you played things through where
I did look back and go, maybe I should have
done that different. You know, I think you have no
other choice in those situations to look in the mirror
and go, Okay, what what did I What did I
do out of this?
Speaker 2 (57:14):
What?
Speaker 1 (57:14):
How can I stop what I did? If what I
contributed to this? How do I not bring this into
the next and which is how it helped me get
through all of it, you know. But that was the
part that really just kind of stuck to me a lot.
Was like, man, I don't think people realize like this
wasn't this like gruesome battle. It was trying to be
forced to be something way bigger than it was, you know.
(57:35):
And I think too, that's why I didn't want to
add any flame to the fire. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (57:39):
It's funny too, is you'll be able to help somebody
else the way Brandley called you, because I'm thinking I've
I've had a lot of contents with Branley, both in
professional settings and like, if we're playing a festival at
the same place, you just hang with people, right, And
I like Brandley a lot me too.
Speaker 1 (57:52):
May it's salt of the earth. What you see is
what you get. Don't get any better, man.
Speaker 2 (57:56):
Like, yeah, probably pretty scary, dude, if you want to
be scary towards you, I wouldn't, but.
Speaker 1 (58:00):
I wouldn't shove them in an alley, but.
Speaker 2 (58:02):
Ye, but I would also if I needed something. And
Brandley and I don't talk a whole lot, but I
do feel like I've had a connection with Brandley where
I could call and be like, hey, dude, would you
help me? And he would come and help me without
it being said he did that for you. Because Brandley's
been through some crap.
Speaker 1 (58:14):
Yeah, man, crap that he probably.
Speaker 2 (58:16):
Was like if I handle that different, I would totally.
And you're doing this now, and what's going to happen
is and I'm sure of it. It's gonna come around
where you're gonna be able to do that for somebody now.
Speaker 1 (58:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (58:26):
Yeah, And that's that perspective and empathy that you never
really want to sign up for that paperwork, like, I'll
have some perspective and empathy because it sucks to have
it because you had to get it through something.
Speaker 1 (58:35):
Yeah, I didn't have it before.
Speaker 2 (58:36):
It's so valuable. Yeah, and it rounds you out as
a person. And I feel like you're like, I mean
like I'm just looking at you, but I feel like
you're like happy.
Speaker 1 (58:43):
I am, man, I just feel in a good place.
I feel I've also allowed you know, I think one
of the cool things about therapy is it shows you
how to use tools when you're out of there.
Speaker 2 (58:52):
What I say, like, if therapy doesn't fix you, it
just give it.
Speaker 1 (58:55):
Gives you tools to understand how to do it. And
so it's allowed me to win instant before when I
I help myself feeling that like kind of just sitting
on the couch. I don't want to do anything. You know.
I don't know if it's really feel sorry for yourself,
but in a way, I guess, you know, And now
I know how to stop that. Now I go, well,
what am I doing?
Speaker 2 (59:13):
You know?
Speaker 1 (59:13):
Get up, do something, call.
Speaker 2 (59:14):
Somebody, or at least have the awareness that it's happening,
or at least have the weareness to me is sometimes
I can't stop it, but I'm like, I know this
is not good. I know what's happening, and I can
say something A want and they can. She can help
me a little bit.
Speaker 1 (59:25):
Man.
Speaker 2 (59:25):
That's I mean, this has been a really good, like
healthy mind. This is all health and wellness.
Speaker 3 (59:29):
Man.
Speaker 1 (59:29):
I think we might we might have.
Speaker 2 (59:30):
So this is the new show.
Speaker 1 (59:32):
This is it.
Speaker 2 (59:33):
Let me say this that Spirits and Demons out now
with Megan Patrick. The new EP, Dive Bars and Broken
Hearts came out in June, because we're in July, so
two weeks.
Speaker 1 (59:42):
Ago, I believe.
Speaker 2 (59:43):
Yeah, So it's out. It's six tracks. You are you
on the road a lot? Now? Is it back full?
Speaker 1 (59:49):
Oh? Yeah? Man? Yo, it's this year really feels like
it's like it's twenty nineteen, like the last couple of years.
It was obviously twenty twenty one was weird. Twenty twenty
two was more open. You kind of had some of
the places that were you know, you had a show
car whatever. But now it's Yeah, me and John Party
played Barefoot Fest I think in New Jersey and it's
(01:00:12):
like third Thursday, like twenty seven thousand people out there
on a Thursday on the beast. If we're back, Yeah, it's.
Speaker 2 (01:00:16):
Full full till congratulations. Man. I just I don't know
a like an existence that just feels healthy.
Speaker 1 (01:00:24):
Thank you man.
Speaker 2 (01:00:25):
You know that's it's awesome, Like that's where it is. Yeah,
that's that's what it is. And you're gonna have songs
to go number one, and you're gonna have seasons that
you can't get anything to work, and you're gonna get
back to the number one again. Yes, seasons again. But
that ain't as much as what it's about. It is
like just that that consistency and knowing that for me,
like there's value regardless.
Speaker 1 (01:00:45):
Yeah, and you know there's more. We look, we're so
fortunate to do what we love and we're passionate about
what we do what we do, but it's not who
we are.
Speaker 2 (01:00:52):
Yeah, I struggle with that. My identity. I really struggle
with what my identity is. Yeah, say man, I'm working
towards it. I still suck at.
Speaker 1 (01:01:00):
He He's just making tomorrow better than today.
Speaker 2 (01:01:01):
You guys follow Michael Ray at Michael Ray Music, Instagram, TikTok,
Michael Ray Official on TikTok, and you guys check out
the new music this is out now. Michael, good to
see buddy
Speaker 3 (01:01:10):
You tue, Buddy, Thank you man, thanks for listening to
a Bobby Cast production
Host
Bobby Bones
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