Nerd Poker

Time to bust down some walls before the talking murder coffin tricks us into opening it!

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Hey, what's a little psychic memory altering amongst chill adventurers? There's definitely something super chill in the mind-flayer coffin. Have a looksee!

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Hey hey hey, let's head to that sweet lil' loot room in the south west... wait, WHAT is in all the hallways?!

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What do we do when an NPC is silent? We light em up! Ok ok ok, he's in a death dungeon being creepy, but still we're just gonna light him up before we see his face or anything that could tell us who they are (boring!).

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The Ding Dong Danglers eye their loot, and encounter a very sheepish and non-threatening door, which of course makes the door creepy and terrifying.

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Deep in the Undercity, the Ding Dong Danglers (official name) creep closer and closer to sick loot and lich murder. And yes, Nerd Poker, where even the traps are passive-aggressive!

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The Ding Dong Danglers emerge from their rest ready for GOODIES in the northwest of the Undercity of Dellsmouth. But they must face... DOORS.

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To the northwest, either an undead thief wizard, a worm god, or trayzure. To the southwest... same. Will the Ding Dong Danglers survive this encounter with a pile of fleshy whoopie-cushions?

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Trayzure ahoy! Now, a short rest before we head into the hallway, where Dan DEFINITELY doesn't have sloppy wet body horror stomping around.

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Well, most of the fish army we brought with us is cooked now, but hey, there's a whole room of possible trayzure on the other side of that wall! 

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The swamp monsters are munching and crunching on our fish army! Oh boogers.

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Now that the slime has come to life and started to strangle our little fish army, it has become apparent that "shortcut" still means "battalion of monsters standing in front of the weak destructible wall."

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Now that we've gone Full Metal on the disintegration statue, let's bust out that magic-shortcut map case and bullet line it to the end of this map. Screw caution, as-the-crow-flies convenience wins every time! 

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Now that we're settled into our new lives as thief kings, maybe we should look into what that means. One big heist is left, and it might be useful to understand if we already won the campaign, you know? Nah. Into the mudhole we go!

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Now that we've burned a bunch of people alive no questions asked, let's loot their corpses! Wait... hey how come their corpses are gripping their loot, we burned it off of them fair and square!

For 3 bonus episodes a month and more, subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/nerdpoker. For merch, social media, and more be sure to head to nerdpokerpod.com.