September 16, 2022 • 13 mins
Dear Steve and Shirley, I’m a 31 year old single female and I just broke up with my boyfriend after 2 years of dating. I gave him all I could in our 2 years of dating and he didn’t show up for me in a way that proved to me that he wanted to get married. He kept on going to the club and hanging out in the strip club. I couldn’t get him to spend time with me on the weekends and I was done with fighting for his attention..........................................
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if
you need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more,
please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com
and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your
letter live on the air, just like we're gonna read
this one right here, right now. You never know, it
could be yours Strawberry letter that Steve there, you go
(00:32):
share you I cannot with him subject I went back
to the streets too soon. Dear Stephen Shirley, I'm a
thirty one year old single female and I just broke
up with my boyfriend after two years of dating. I
gave him all I could in our two years of dating,
and he didn't show up for me in a way
that proved to me that he wanted to get married.
(00:52):
He kept on going to the club and hanging out
in the strip club. I couldn't get him to spend
time with me on the weekends, and I was done
with fighting for his attention. A week after we broke up,
I had a party in a private room at a
hookah lounge. He popped up and had a problem with
me being out so soon there was a life size
picture of me in a corner with the words back
(01:14):
to the Streets on it. This is what he was
most offended by. He told me that he had hopes
of us getting back together, but this showed him that
I was really done with him. I was tipsy and
happy that he happened to come to the club that
night and saw me celebrating being free from a dead
end relationship. A few days after that, his mother called
(01:37):
me and said that her son, my ex boyfriend, felt
some kind of way about me celebrating our breakup. I
was respectful to his mother, but I felt justified in
my actions. Now, a few months later, I do feel
bad about claiming the streets, since nothing is in the
streets and men really don't want to commit to women nowadays.
(01:58):
I called to apologize eyes for embarrassing him, and he
wasn't trying to hear it. I told him that I
was willing to be patient with him, and he said
he's no longer interested. My mom said, he's using my
back to the Streets party as a way out because
he never because he wasn't ever planning to make me
a priority, and he was going to string me along
(02:20):
for a long time. Is my mom. Right, should I
stop asking him to come back? What? Yes, you should
stop asking him to come back. He told you he
was no longer interested. You felt justified in your actions.
You wanted to leave this dead in relationship. What has happened? Yes,
listen to your mom. Leave that man along. You were out,
(02:43):
you were free and clear, you were happy. Now you're
feeling guilty and feeling sorry for him. Believe me, that's
all it is. His ego wants you back just to say,
or at that time anyway, just to say he could
get you back if you go back. He'll only do
the same thing to you. But remember he said he's
not interested. He hasn't changed. You're on your own and
(03:07):
your own. Mom said that he was never planning to
make you a priority. Believe her. He showed you in
his actions. All he wants is revenge. Right now, you
have to remember why you left him in the first place.
Remember what you said in the letter. He spent all
of his time at the strip club. He had no
time for you, especially on the weekends. He did this
(03:27):
for two all years. So please wake up. Don't fall
back into that old pattern you were in with him.
You were constantly fighting for his attention. Just go on
with your life. Forget him. He is no longer worth
your time. You're still worried about him and what he's doing.
You won't have time to meet someone new, Okay, so
let him go by Steve. Wow, easy letter to do.
(03:52):
She easy letter to do. Yeah, I went back to
the streets too soon. My response to that time is no,
you didn't. It's real easy. It's just amazing. I love
the way men switch it, flip it. I love it,
but it's even more of me amazing how when a
(04:13):
woman allows it because of your kind heart and always
trying to fix men and heal everybody, but shoot, you
wind up being the most injured all the time. If
women focused on fixing themselves like they focused on fixing others,
(04:33):
that would be less damaged women in the world. Man,
don't let a man tell you twice he don't want you.
What is wrong with this? Now? You're thirty one year
a single female. You broke up with your boyfriend up
two years a date. So for two years what did
he do? You gave him all you could for two
(04:54):
years a day. He didn't show up for me in
a way to prove that he wanted to give him
getting married, kept on to the club, kept hanging out
that strip club, couldn't get him to spend time with
you on the weekend, and I was done with fighting
for his attention. It took you two years to come today,
but you did it in congratulations. A week after we
(05:19):
broke up, one week you had a party in a
private room at a Hookah Lowns. He popped up and
had a problem with me being out so soon. How
could you get over me so quickly? Well, I've had
(05:39):
two years to get over you. You ain't been coming
here on the weekends. Now I'm throwing a private party
in the private room at the Hooka Lowns on week
end night. Now you're on a weekend. You're available now.
You know that was a life size picture of me
in a corner with the words back to the streets
on okay, cool, great affirmation, positivity, funny, back to the street.
(06:11):
That is what he was most offended by. You know
why he was most offended by because he from the street.
He in the street. He knows what's in the street
because he out there in him. He told me he
had hopes of us getting back together, but this showed
me that I was really done with him. Yeah, yeah,
And we wasn't really together though, right, we don't get
(06:34):
back together, so you can ignore me for two more years.
All right, Hang on, Steve, we'll have part two of
your response coming up at twenty three minutes after the
hour today Strawberry letter, subject I went back to the
streets too soon. We'll get back into it right after this.
You're listening show, All right, Come on, Steve, let's recap
(06:58):
today Strawberry letter. The subject is I went back to
the streets too soon. Well, you didn't. Thirty one year old,
You dated a boy for two years. You gave him
everything you could for two years. He stayed in the streets,
kept going the clubs, kept going the strip clubs. Never
wanted to spend time with you on the weekends. You
couldn't get him to spend time with you, and you
(07:19):
was done with fighting for his attention. Then a week
after y'all broke up, you threw a party in the
Pride Room matter who can lounge, had a big picture
of yourself up in the corner, says back to the street.
He popped up, which he ain't been popping up on weekends.
Where his ass come. He propped up at the party,
and then he said he couldn't believe he had a
hope that you always gonna get back together, but this
(07:42):
showed him that I was really done with him. He
didn't say I was wanting to be committed to you,
that I wanted to treat you right. Finally, all he
said was I want to get back together with you,
And all that means is I'm gonna continue to treat
you the way I've been treating you, and I just
want now you to be able to accept it more.
(08:04):
I was tipsy and happy that he happened to come
to the club that night and saw me celebrating free
from a daddy relationship. And the reason you was happy
and admitting it, it's because you was tipsy. You probably
need to get tipsy a little more often then, because
if that makes you see what it is, better than
(08:26):
go ahead. A few days after that, his mama called
me and said that her son, my ex boyfriend, felt
some kind of way about me celebrating our break up.
I was respectful to his mother, but I felt justified
in my action right and you were. But his mama
called and said her son felt sometimes so right, So
(08:50):
now everybody around him got the call on him. You
got to call on him. His damn mammy got to
call you, tell her he's feeling some kind of way.
Give a damn about chill mammy calling me saying that
ragging ass some Why don't you ask him why we
(09:10):
broke up? Calling me telling how he's feeling some kind
of way about celebrating our break up. Hen we couldn't
celebrate the relationship, might as well celebrate the break up
now a few months later, I do feel bad about claiming.
The street says nothing is in the street, and men
really don't want to commit to women nowadays. You had
(09:31):
one who was in the streets who didn't want to
commit to you nowadays or none of the entire two years.
I called to apologize for embassing him, and he wasn't
trying to hear it. Man, this dude is manipulator at
the highest level right here. He is a manipulator. So
now he gonna he gonna make you crawl? How are
(09:53):
you sure you ain't gotta apologize for a damn thing
in bassing him? First of all, you didn't invite him
to the party. He popped up and saw you back
in the street sign. Yeah, my mother said he's using
my back to the Street party as a way out
(10:13):
because he wasn't ever planning to make me a proud
and he was gonna string me along for another for
a long time. It's my mom, right, Your mother is
one thousand percent? Yes, Oh, but I got news from here.
Should I stop asking him to come back now? You
need to stop being stupid, ask him to come back
to do what you didn't like the two years you
(10:35):
had with him. You want a relationship with a man
to stay in the club, to go to strip clubs
and don't spend time with you on the weekend. You
want that for what? Do I stop being? Stop being stupid?
He wants you back to continue to going along with
what you've been going along with, and this time he
(10:56):
gonna do even more. You be a fool to go
back to this manipulation now. He is my best point
for you. His mama called and told you her son
was hurt and felt some kind of way about you
celebrating y'all's break up. Yo. Mama called and said he's
(11:19):
using your back to the Street party as a way out,
and he was never planning to make your broad and
he was gonna strain you alone for a long time. Now,
you had two different calls from two different mamas. One
of the mothers only has her son's interests at heart, yea,
And one of the mothers has his her daughter's interests
(11:43):
at heart. Which one sound better to your right? Let's
see which one sound better to you? Two mothers called you?
Which one of these mothers called you? On? Yo behad? Yeah?
You know if hum, if this boy's mama was real, right,
you know what she just said. You know what, I know,
(12:06):
Deontay ain't been doing you right. And I know Deontay
has made some mistakes, but I think he might have
come to his senses. And you know he you a
beautiful girl, and I love being around you. Just talk
with him and see maybe if he didn't grow up
behind this cause Deontay just sitting around moping, he ain't
(12:28):
been the same. That's what the phone call that could
have made sense to you, right, But this other phone
call she made quit taking his health was call. But
he himself told, tell your mammy, don't call me no
(12:49):
damn mo oh love it or better yet? Yeah, your mama,
Deontay mama noum leave Leave, leave us your comments on
Today's Strawberry Letter on Instagram, at Steve Harvey fm dot com,
and check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand. Coming
up next, pregnant Abby de LaRosa defends her polyamorous relationship
(13:13):
with Nick Cannon. Oh really, we'll find out what that's
all about right after this. You're listening to The Stave
Harvey Morning Show.
It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter, and if
you need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more,
please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com
and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your
letter live on the air, just like we're gonna read
this one right here, right now. You never know, it
could be yours Strawberry letter that Steve there, you go
(00:32):
share you I cannot with him subject I went back
to the streets too soon. Dear Stephen Shirley, I'm a
thirty one year old single female and I just broke
up with my boyfriend after two years of dating. I
gave him all I could in our two years of dating,
and he didn't show up for me in a way
that proved to me that he wanted to get married.
(00:52):
He kept on going to the club and hanging out
in the strip club. I couldn't get him to spend
time with me on the weekends, and I was done
with fighting for his attention. A week after we broke up,
I had a party in a private room at a
hookah lounge. He popped up and had a problem with
me being out so soon there was a life size
picture of me in a corner with the words back
(01:14):
to the Streets on it. This is what he was
most offended by. He told me that he had hopes
of us getting back together, but this showed him that
I was really done with him. I was tipsy and
happy that he happened to come to the club that
night and saw me celebrating being free from a dead
end relationship. A few days after that, his mother called
(01:37):
me and said that her son, my ex boyfriend, felt
some kind of way about me celebrating our breakup. I
was respectful to his mother, but I felt justified in
my actions. Now, a few months later, I do feel
bad about claiming the streets, since nothing is in the
streets and men really don't want to commit to women nowadays.
(01:58):
I called to apologize eyes for embarrassing him, and he
wasn't trying to hear it. I told him that I
was willing to be patient with him, and he said
he's no longer interested. My mom said, he's using my
back to the Streets party as a way out because
he never because he wasn't ever planning to make me
a priority, and he was going to string me along
(02:20):
for a long time. Is my mom. Right, should I
stop asking him to come back? What? Yes, you should
stop asking him to come back. He told you he
was no longer interested. You felt justified in your actions.
You wanted to leave this dead in relationship. What has happened? Yes,
listen to your mom. Leave that man along. You were out,
(02:43):
you were free and clear, you were happy. Now you're
feeling guilty and feeling sorry for him. Believe me, that's
all it is. His ego wants you back just to say,
or at that time anyway, just to say he could
get you back if you go back. He'll only do
the same thing to you. But remember he said he's
not interested. He hasn't changed. You're on your own and
(03:07):
your own. Mom said that he was never planning to
make you a priority. Believe her. He showed you in
his actions. All he wants is revenge. Right now, you
have to remember why you left him in the first place.
Remember what you said in the letter. He spent all
of his time at the strip club. He had no
time for you, especially on the weekends. He did this
(03:27):
for two all years. So please wake up. Don't fall
back into that old pattern you were in with him.
You were constantly fighting for his attention. Just go on
with your life. Forget him. He is no longer worth
your time. You're still worried about him and what he's doing.
You won't have time to meet someone new, Okay, so
let him go by Steve. Wow, easy letter to do.
(03:52):
She easy letter to do. Yeah, I went back to
the streets too soon. My response to that time is no,
you didn't. It's real easy. It's just amazing. I love
the way men switch it, flip it. I love it,
but it's even more of me amazing how when a
(04:13):
woman allows it because of your kind heart and always
trying to fix men and heal everybody, but shoot, you
wind up being the most injured all the time. If
women focused on fixing themselves like they focused on fixing others,
(04:33):
that would be less damaged women in the world. Man,
don't let a man tell you twice he don't want you.
What is wrong with this? Now? You're thirty one year
a single female. You broke up with your boyfriend up
two years a date. So for two years what did
he do? You gave him all you could for two
(04:54):
years a day. He didn't show up for me in
a way to prove that he wanted to give him
getting married, kept on to the club, kept hanging out
that strip club, couldn't get him to spend time with
you on the weekend, and I was done with fighting
for his attention. It took you two years to come today,
but you did it in congratulations. A week after we
(05:19):
broke up, one week you had a party in a
private room at a Hookah Lowns. He popped up and
had a problem with me being out so soon. How
could you get over me so quickly? Well, I've had
(05:39):
two years to get over you. You ain't been coming
here on the weekends. Now I'm throwing a private party
in the private room at the Hooka Lowns on week
end night. Now you're on a weekend. You're available now.
You know that was a life size picture of me
in a corner with the words back to the streets
on okay, cool, great affirmation, positivity, funny, back to the street.
(06:11):
That is what he was most offended by. You know
why he was most offended by because he from the street.
He in the street. He knows what's in the street
because he out there in him. He told me he
had hopes of us getting back together, but this showed
me that I was really done with him. Yeah, yeah,
And we wasn't really together though, right, we don't get
(06:34):
back together, so you can ignore me for two more years.
All right, Hang on, Steve, we'll have part two of
your response coming up at twenty three minutes after the
hour today Strawberry letter, subject I went back to the
streets too soon. We'll get back into it right after this.
You're listening show, All right, Come on, Steve, let's recap
(06:58):
today Strawberry letter. The subject is I went back to
the streets too soon. Well, you didn't. Thirty one year old,
You dated a boy for two years. You gave him
everything you could for two years. He stayed in the streets,
kept going the clubs, kept going the strip clubs. Never
wanted to spend time with you on the weekends. You
couldn't get him to spend time with you, and you
(07:19):
was done with fighting for his attention. Then a week
after y'all broke up, you threw a party in the
Pride Room matter who can lounge, had a big picture
of yourself up in the corner, says back to the street.
He popped up, which he ain't been popping up on weekends.
Where his ass come. He propped up at the party,
and then he said he couldn't believe he had a
hope that you always gonna get back together, but this
(07:42):
showed him that I was really done with him. He
didn't say I was wanting to be committed to you,
that I wanted to treat you right. Finally, all he
said was I want to get back together with you,
And all that means is I'm gonna continue to treat
you the way I've been treating you, and I just
want now you to be able to accept it more.
(08:04):
I was tipsy and happy that he happened to come
to the club that night and saw me celebrating free
from a daddy relationship. And the reason you was happy
and admitting it, it's because you was tipsy. You probably
need to get tipsy a little more often then, because
if that makes you see what it is, better than
(08:26):
go ahead. A few days after that, his mama called
me and said that her son, my ex boyfriend, felt
some kind of way about me celebrating our break up.
I was respectful to his mother, but I felt justified
in my action right and you were. But his mama
called and said her son felt sometimes so right, So
(08:50):
now everybody around him got the call on him. You
got to call on him. His damn mammy got to
call you, tell her he's feeling some kind of way.
Give a damn about chill mammy calling me saying that
ragging ass some Why don't you ask him why we
(09:10):
broke up? Calling me telling how he's feeling some kind
of way about celebrating our break up. Hen we couldn't
celebrate the relationship, might as well celebrate the break up
now a few months later, I do feel bad about claiming.
The street says nothing is in the street, and men
really don't want to commit to women nowadays. You had
(09:31):
one who was in the streets who didn't want to
commit to you nowadays or none of the entire two years.
I called to apologize for embassing him, and he wasn't
trying to hear it. Man, this dude is manipulator at
the highest level right here. He is a manipulator. So
now he gonna he gonna make you crawl? How are
(09:53):
you sure you ain't gotta apologize for a damn thing
in bassing him? First of all, you didn't invite him
to the party. He popped up and saw you back
in the street sign. Yeah, my mother said he's using
my back to the Street party as a way out
(10:13):
because he wasn't ever planning to make me a proud
and he was gonna string me along for another for
a long time. It's my mom, right, Your mother is
one thousand percent? Yes, Oh, but I got news from here.
Should I stop asking him to come back now? You
need to stop being stupid, ask him to come back
to do what you didn't like the two years you
(10:35):
had with him. You want a relationship with a man
to stay in the club, to go to strip clubs
and don't spend time with you on the weekend. You
want that for what? Do I stop being? Stop being stupid?
He wants you back to continue to going along with
what you've been going along with, and this time he
(10:56):
gonna do even more. You be a fool to go
back to this manipulation now. He is my best point
for you. His mama called and told you her son
was hurt and felt some kind of way about you
celebrating y'all's break up. Yo. Mama called and said he's
(11:19):
using your back to the Street party as a way out,
and he was never planning to make your broad and
he was gonna strain you alone for a long time. Now,
you had two different calls from two different mamas. One
of the mothers only has her son's interests at heart, yea,
And one of the mothers has his her daughter's interests
(11:43):
at heart. Which one sound better to your right? Let's
see which one sound better to you? Two mothers called you?
Which one of these mothers called you? On? Yo behad? Yeah?
You know if hum, if this boy's mama was real, right,
you know what she just said. You know what, I know,
(12:06):
Deontay ain't been doing you right. And I know Deontay
has made some mistakes, but I think he might have
come to his senses. And you know he you a
beautiful girl, and I love being around you. Just talk
with him and see maybe if he didn't grow up
behind this cause Deontay just sitting around moping, he ain't
(12:28):
been the same. That's what the phone call that could
have made sense to you, right, But this other phone
call she made quit taking his health was call. But
he himself told, tell your mammy, don't call me no
(12:49):
damn mo oh love it or better yet? Yeah, your mama,
Deontay mama noum leave Leave, leave us your comments on
Today's Strawberry Letter on Instagram, at Steve Harvey fm dot com,
and check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand. Coming
up next, pregnant Abby de LaRosa defends her polyamorous relationship
(13:13):
with Nick Cannon. Oh really, we'll find out what that's
all about right after this. You're listening to The Stave
Harvey Morning Show.
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