Quick Win: How to take a self-compassion break

Did you know that just like a coffee break, or a toilet break, you can take a self-compassion break?  

And did you know using regular self-compassion can transform how you respond to setbacks? 

Professor Kristin Neff is a pioneer in the study of self-compassion with multiple best-selling books on the topic, and she believes a self-compassion break can make all the difference to your wellbeing. 

Kristin shares: 

• 🎧 A special, full walkthrough experience of how to take a self-compassion break. This is something you can come back and listen to every time you’d like to experience one. 

Listen to the full interview with Kristin here. 

Connect Kristin via X, Linkedin, or on her website. 

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Credits:

Host: Amantha Imber 

Sound Engineer: The Podcast Butler 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Did you know that being self compassionate doesn't mean taking
a bubble bath or awkwardly scheduling aside time to relax
and try yourself. In fact, there are some simple strategies
you can use to show yourself self compassion that could
drastically influence your happiness and productivity. Professor Kristin Neff is
a pioneer in the study of self compassion, and her

(00:23):
work in the field and multiple best selling books on
the topic have seen her become recognized as one of
the most influential people in the field of psychology. So
I caught up with her to get some insight on
how we can all be more self compassionate. Welcome to

(00:45):
How I Work, a show about habits, rituals, and strategies
for optimizing your day. I'm your host, doctor Amantha Imber.
On today's quick Win episode, we go back to any
to be from the past and I pick out a
quick win that you can apply today. When I spoke
to Professor Kristin Neff, she spoke about the power of

(01:07):
taking a self compassion break to work through problems and
challenges that we might be struggling with to help us
better understand it Kristin actually gave us a real time
walk through of a self compassion break so that we
can listen and apply it to ourselves.

Speaker 2 (01:26):
All Right, So we might want to close your eyes.
You don't have to close your eyes in real life,
but it helps, especially in this context, to go inward. Okay,
And so I'd invite you to think about something in
your life that's troubling you or causing you stress. Perhaps
it is something to work, some stress or you're experiencing,

(01:46):
or maybe you've made some mistake or feel like a
failure at something. It also might be in your personal
life or relationship issue, or even be a health issue.
I would invite people with this not to think of
anything that's too stressful or overwhelming, because if you're overwhelmed,
you're even going to be able to learn the practice.

(02:08):
So choose something that's mild to moderately distressing. Call the
situation to mind, what's happening, what's going on? See if
you can feel the discomfort of what's happening in your body.
Notice usually those feelings of contraction or unease. Well, bring

(02:34):
in mindfulness, just to become aware of and be present
with the fact that it's hard to be feeling this
or it's hard to be in this situation. I'm hurting.
We don't want to ignore it. The other hand, we
don't want to lose ourself with it. We just want

(02:55):
to see it, be with it as it is. This
is hard. And also to remember that things like this
they're part of being human. There are probably literally millions
of people experiencing something similar. You know, some worse, maybe
not as bad. But the point is mainly that you

(03:17):
are a human being. This is part of the shared
human experience. You are not alone. There's nothing wrong with
you or whatever it is you're worried about or thinking about.
And this is part for the course, it's part of
being a human being. We make mistakes, we struggle, stuff happens.

(03:42):
You aren't perfect, No one's perfect, no one's life is perfect.
Knowing about you too, go ahead and put maybe both
hands on your heart, or full your arms, or maybe
cradle your face, use some sort of physical gesture. It
really brings some physical warmth and support to yourself. Express

(04:05):
our kindness through touch and also any words of support,
kindness and encouragement that are exactly what you need to
hear right now, whatever your situation is, you know, perhaps
it's something like you're doing the best you can, or

(04:26):
you've got this, I'm here for you, I won't abandon you.
What do you need? And in fact, you might imagine
what you would say to a friend who is in
the exact same situation you were, maybe easier to think
of the appropriate thing to say. If you think of

(04:48):
what if you had a good friend it was in
the exact same situation you were, would you say to
be supportive and kind and helpful, encouraging, maybe just validating,
and then see if you can see something similar to yourself. Okay,

(05:13):
then you can open your eyes. So we did a
slightly longer one to show the steps, but you can
do it really quick.

Speaker 1 (05:20):
I hope you enjoyed this little quick win with Professor
Kristen Deff. If you would like to listen to the
full interview, you can find a link to that in
the show notes. If you like today's show, make sure
you get follow on your podcast app to be alerted
when new episodes drop. How I Work was recorded on
the traditional land of the Warrangery People, part of the
Cooler Nation