March 1, 2023 • 12 mins
Full Disclosure: This Woman's Family Doesn't Know She's Dying
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Robin Terrrit Kip on Brisbane's Kiss ninety seven to.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Three Robin Terry and Gibbs Full disclosure, no exposure, forgive
me Father, for.
Speaker 1 (00:11):
I of sin. So the normal way to tell us
your stories to head to Kiss thirty seven three the website,
follow the links there for full disclosure, no exposure. You
can tell us your story. Only one person in the
building will speak to you, and we'll scramble your voice,
so we don't know who you are. We'll never expose
who you are, and you get to tell your story
and get opinions on it. Maybe maybe you're feeling like,
(00:32):
am I right?
Speaker 3 (00:33):
Am I wrong?
Speaker 1 (00:34):
And this will be the answer.
Speaker 4 (00:35):
Okay, so this is a big secret and we'd love
your opinion on it. Thirteen one oh six five. It's
come through my DMS. I actually asked for a recording
of the voice and now we've scrambled it. But this
is a very full, long story.
Speaker 5 (00:48):
So my big secret is that I had an endor
nineteen years agree under horrible circumstances, but all of my
family was overseas, so I chose to have my daughter
(01:10):
and loved her. She passed away six years ago when
she was thirteen from a accident. To this day, my
family don't even know that she existed because they only
moved back here four years ago. Eighteen months ago, I
(01:30):
was diagnosed with about cancer. I had surgery and chemo,
but it had already moved to my lungs. Three months
ago I decided to have no more treatment, no more drugs,
no more oxygen, just to live every day as if
(01:53):
it was my last, and unfortunately it is actually getting
to that point. I do believe that it is from
the trauma that I have experienced in my life that
has caused the cancer. And that's fine. It's my choice
(02:15):
that none of my family or friends I actually know
about the cancer. I do not like to burden people,
but I just hope and pray that everyone lives every
day to the fullest and that we can all learn
(02:38):
to accept things as well.
Speaker 1 (02:41):
So they're my biggest secrets, massive secrets.
Speaker 4 (02:47):
The question is keeping secrets from family, family and friends.
No one knows the situation that this particular person is in.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
She is so alone, She's so so alone through both
of those with the child and the cancer, and you
just need I understand, whatever relationship is with a family,
it may not be a family person, but everyone in
their life needs one person just to be a sounding
board for them to say it is a way I'm
feeling about this, Okay, but don't we.
Speaker 4 (03:13):
Have a choice to live the life that we want
to live. And if she feels that maybe her family
wouldn't be supportive, then it's better off for her to
journey this way alone. And she's also already been through
one trauma, so to go through this final thing. She's
kind of going, well, I just feel like that. I mean, ultimately,
we are the only people that can have a say
(03:34):
on our lives.
Speaker 2 (03:35):
Would you want if you're not family, than a friend
or someone?
Speaker 1 (03:38):
Well, when she said yeah, I mean she said, I
don't want to burden anyone with this, But I just
think I don't think this is a burden that you
meant to take a loan. It's too big, I reckon,
You've got to share it with someone. That's what family's for,
that's what friends are for, right to share the load,
because it's too much for her to go through that
by myself.
Speaker 4 (03:56):
Okay, but she's sharing it with us. She's actually chosen
to share it with us. And for everyone that's listening
in their cars or at home or whatever on the radio.
So seriously, guys, thirteen one oh six five. I guess
it's the ultimate privilege. We are the only people that
know this secret, and we don't know.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
Who she is, and she's listening.
Speaker 4 (04:17):
She is listening now, and I've asked her if she
wants to say anything, that she can comment through my DM.
So based on what you guys say, she'll respond.
Speaker 1 (04:26):
Thirteen one oh sixty five is our number to get involved,
Rob Terry and keep on kiss ninety seven three, I say, House,
Rober Terary, keep on kiss ninety seven three eight fourteen,
Robin Terry and kibs full disclosure, no exposure.
Speaker 6 (04:42):
Forgive me father, for I have sin.
Speaker 1 (04:45):
Well, everyone's ready to weigh in. Thirteen one oh sixty
five is our number. Our story this morning came through
your DM's rock.
Speaker 4 (04:50):
Yes, someone I wanted to tell me their big secret
and that and because they've chosen not to tell anyone
else that they know, so no family or friends, no,
So that this particular person who originally had a child
that died, they didn't know about that. And they also
don't know that this person now has terminal cancer. And
I think is wanting validation for keeping the secret, but
(05:13):
I was chosen to tell us and with full permission,
we are airing it and I guess maybe want some support.
On thirteen one, six five, Sarah of logan Holm, what
do you reckon about keeping such a massive secret from
your family?
Speaker 6 (05:27):
Hello?
Speaker 2 (05:28):
Yeah, hello Sarah? What do you think?
Speaker 4 (05:29):
Sarah?
Speaker 2 (05:30):
Hi?
Speaker 6 (05:30):
Sorry?
Speaker 3 (05:32):
Yeah?
Speaker 6 (05:32):
Look, my husband has staged three without cancer about all now,
seven year old baby was eleven weeks old. Wow. He
chose not to tell his family. He chose not to
tell anybody. I knew and my family knew, and I
was really his only line of support. I'm a nurse
(05:54):
as well, and so that was helpful, but just something
that he couldn't do. He couldn't face telling other people,
and he just wanted to concentrate on fighting this disease
and he did and he beat it. And his family
know now, but they didn't know for a long time.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
How did they feel? Did the family tell you how
they feel it felt about it?
Speaker 6 (06:18):
Oh? One family member was upset with me for not
telling her when he was in hospital, but she understood
that that's what he wanted and she forgave. At the
end of the day. You know, you've got to focus
on you. It takes a lot of energy. I just
hope this lady has one person to lean on.
Speaker 4 (06:36):
Yeah, okay, so that would be your message to her.
Speaker 6 (06:39):
Yeah, just even just someone.
Speaker 4 (06:41):
Okay, yeah, it may in fact be us, Kayla of Kabucha,
what do you reckon?
Speaker 7 (06:48):
So this one is actually quite close to home as well.
And I just definitely think she doesn't need to go
through this alone. And all she has to do is
just retail to somebody that you know, she is confident
in sharing it with. She has been brave enough to
speak up to you, reach out to you, and go
and talk through her trauma. But I think everyone listening
(07:12):
today just wants to give her a big hug and
tell her to speak up. She doesn't have to go
through it alone.
Speaker 4 (07:19):
Lovely, Kayla, thank you.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
I'm seeing some of the other cause I producer putting
up go. You know you're not a burden. You need
to help with this.
Speaker 4 (07:27):
Yeah, okay, Well I'm just I'm waiting to see if
she wants to respond to any of this through my DMS.
But yeah, keep the cause coming. Thirteen one O sixty five.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Full Disclosure Exposure forgive Me Father, for ive sin.
Speaker 1 (07:40):
Our full disclosure no exposure. This morning is from a
lady who has a couple of massive secrets she's been
keeping from her family, and the most pressing I guess
is that she has terminal cancer and is dealing with
it alone.
Speaker 5 (07:54):
It's my choice. None of my family, all friends I
actually know about the cancer.
Speaker 4 (08:03):
I do not like to burden people, So everyone's been
calling through saying please just tell one person, just share
the burden of this, and she has now responded on
my DMS. She says, I totally understand what they are saying,
that I should have at least one person to help me,
But I think that brings me more stress because I
would be worried about how they will cope once I'm gone.
(08:26):
I'm at peace. I'm not scared.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
She's a very brave person, but she's been so strong
for so long, and people who are so strong for
so long don't like being seen to be needing help.
Speaker 4 (08:36):
Yeah, true, that.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
What do you think about I know this is about her, obviously,
but what about those family members, Like, for example, for me,
if my brother, if I found out that my brother
was dying and hadn't told me, I mean, I just
I would be so heartbroken by that.
Speaker 4 (08:52):
Yeah, but you'd also have to respect it, right, And
I do understand when she talks about it, and I
know this when Shaun was kind of in his final
month with his cancer, is that there is a piece
that comes with the acceptance and you then kind of
just want to go out and live the best life
you can. So for her, if her best life is
not burdening other people, I totally respect that. But Heidi
(09:16):
summer Ball, our counselor from Heidi's Counseling Service dot com,
You've been listening, Heidi, and you've got some really constructive
things to say. What do you reckon?
Speaker 3 (09:26):
Yeah, the first thing I'd say is she obviously has
a need to share this, or she wouldn't have contacted you.
So she has wanted to unburden. And I know that
she's talking about wanting to protect her family or saving
them from grief, but they are going to be grieving
and they're also now going to have shock. So actually
(09:47):
the ramifications of this afterwards for them are in some
ways harder because they're not going to get the opportunity
to show her love and care and to say farewell
to her. And at no point she said she's got
a bad relationship with her family in fact, because she
kept the secret about her daughter. What that tells me
is she cares about what her family thinks. And I've
(10:09):
seen this before where actually family members have resentment later
on because they were robbed of this time with them.
Speaker 4 (10:16):
But that's not going to be her problem, right. So
in the moment, all we're dealing with is how she
wants to deal with that. And if she doesn't want
to talk to the family, then doesn't she have that right.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
Yeah, But in her response to you, she said, I'm
worried that it's going to be hard for them once
I'm gone. So she does care about what it's going
to be like for them once she's gone. And what
I'm saying is that by withholding it, it's actually going
to be harder for them because not only they will
be grieving, they're going to have shock, They're going to
have confusion, They're not going to understand why. And I
(10:46):
also wanted to say, I would really like to offer
an appointment to this woman for free, obviously, even if
I have to come to her, just to work through
some of this and talk through some of this with her,
because she just hasn't had anybody to share it with.
And that's what therapy is. It's holding the space for
somebody with these really big, uncomfortable situations and scenarios and
(11:10):
how do.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
You will be all of the things you said about
a fai. It would be a lot to take on now,
But there are things that could be said to her.
She just doesn't realize people think about it and know
about it and the love they want to put to her,
which you know she needs to hear.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
Yeah, for herself, it sounds as though she's okay.
Speaker 7 (11:27):
With going through this alone.
Speaker 3 (11:28):
I think it's all right for her, But she's worrying
so much about other people and not wanting to burden them,
and to not the words she's using, I don't want
to burden other people. I don't want to cause them stress,
And so she's so concerned about caring for others. And
I guess the view that I'm offering is that, in fact,
it will be kinder to give them that opportunity to
(11:53):
say all these things, to not be left with questions
and wondering why and you know, weren't we supportive and
why wouldn't she give us the opportunity to tell us
how we feel to farewell her, to give us closure.
I honestly have seen this scenario and family members left
behind are hurt and they're confused.
Speaker 1 (12:13):
Well, let's hope she's hearing this and whats you reach
out and have this time with Heidi as well.
Speaker 4 (12:17):
She is hearing it, HAIDI, So if she wants to
get in contact, we will put you two together. But
the one thing I will say about this woman categorically
is she is incredibly brave.
Speaker 5 (12:27):
It's improvant.
Speaker 4 (12:27):
Terry and Kim on Brisbane's Chis ninety seventy three
Robin Terrrit Kip on Brisbane's Kiss ninety seven to.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Three Robin Terry and Gibbs Full disclosure, no exposure, forgive
me Father, for.
Speaker 1 (00:11):
I of sin. So the normal way to tell us
your stories to head to Kiss thirty seven three the website,
follow the links there for full disclosure, no exposure. You
can tell us your story. Only one person in the
building will speak to you, and we'll scramble your voice,
so we don't know who you are. We'll never expose
who you are, and you get to tell your story
and get opinions on it. Maybe maybe you're feeling like,
(00:32):
am I right?
Speaker 3 (00:33):
Am I wrong?
Speaker 1 (00:34):
And this will be the answer.
Speaker 4 (00:35):
Okay, so this is a big secret and we'd love
your opinion on it. Thirteen one oh six five. It's
come through my DMS. I actually asked for a recording
of the voice and now we've scrambled it. But this
is a very full, long story.
Speaker 5 (00:48):
So my big secret is that I had an endor
nineteen years agree under horrible circumstances, but all of my
family was overseas, so I chose to have my daughter
(01:10):
and loved her. She passed away six years ago when
she was thirteen from a accident. To this day, my
family don't even know that she existed because they only
moved back here four years ago. Eighteen months ago, I
(01:30):
was diagnosed with about cancer. I had surgery and chemo,
but it had already moved to my lungs. Three months
ago I decided to have no more treatment, no more drugs,
no more oxygen, just to live every day as if
(01:53):
it was my last, and unfortunately it is actually getting
to that point. I do believe that it is from
the trauma that I have experienced in my life that
has caused the cancer. And that's fine. It's my choice
(02:15):
that none of my family or friends I actually know
about the cancer. I do not like to burden people,
but I just hope and pray that everyone lives every
day to the fullest and that we can all learn
(02:38):
to accept things as well.
Speaker 1 (02:41):
So they're my biggest secrets, massive secrets.
Speaker 4 (02:47):
The question is keeping secrets from family, family and friends.
No one knows the situation that this particular person is in.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
She is so alone, She's so so alone through both
of those with the child and the cancer, and you
just need I understand, whatever relationship is with a family,
it may not be a family person, but everyone in
their life needs one person just to be a sounding
board for them to say it is a way I'm
feeling about this, Okay, but don't we.
Speaker 4 (03:13):
Have a choice to live the life that we want
to live. And if she feels that maybe her family
wouldn't be supportive, then it's better off for her to
journey this way alone. And she's also already been through
one trauma, so to go through this final thing. She's
kind of going, well, I just feel like that. I mean, ultimately,
we are the only people that can have a say
(03:34):
on our lives.
Speaker 2 (03:35):
Would you want if you're not family, than a friend
or someone?
Speaker 1 (03:38):
Well, when she said yeah, I mean she said, I
don't want to burden anyone with this, But I just
think I don't think this is a burden that you
meant to take a loan. It's too big, I reckon,
You've got to share it with someone. That's what family's for,
that's what friends are for, right to share the load,
because it's too much for her to go through that
by myself.
Speaker 4 (03:56):
Okay, but she's sharing it with us. She's actually chosen
to share it with us. And for everyone that's listening
in their cars or at home or whatever on the radio.
So seriously, guys, thirteen one oh six five. I guess
it's the ultimate privilege. We are the only people that
know this secret, and we don't know.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
Who she is, and she's listening.
Speaker 4 (04:17):
She is listening now, and I've asked her if she
wants to say anything, that she can comment through my DM.
So based on what you guys say, she'll respond.
Speaker 1 (04:26):
Thirteen one oh sixty five is our number to get involved,
Rob Terry and keep on kiss ninety seven three, I say, House,
Rober Terary, keep on kiss ninety seven three eight fourteen,
Robin Terry and kibs full disclosure, no exposure.
Speaker 6 (04:42):
Forgive me father, for I have sin.
Speaker 1 (04:45):
Well, everyone's ready to weigh in. Thirteen one oh sixty
five is our number. Our story this morning came through
your DM's rock.
Speaker 4 (04:50):
Yes, someone I wanted to tell me their big secret
and that and because they've chosen not to tell anyone
else that they know, so no family or friends, no,
So that this particular person who originally had a child
that died, they didn't know about that. And they also
don't know that this person now has terminal cancer. And
I think is wanting validation for keeping the secret, but
(05:13):
I was chosen to tell us and with full permission,
we are airing it and I guess maybe want some support.
On thirteen one, six five, Sarah of logan Holm, what
do you reckon about keeping such a massive secret from
your family?
Speaker 6 (05:27):
Hello?
Speaker 2 (05:28):
Yeah, hello Sarah? What do you think?
Speaker 4 (05:29):
Sarah?
Speaker 2 (05:30):
Hi?
Speaker 6 (05:30):
Sorry?
Speaker 3 (05:32):
Yeah?
Speaker 6 (05:32):
Look, my husband has staged three without cancer about all now,
seven year old baby was eleven weeks old. Wow. He
chose not to tell his family. He chose not to
tell anybody. I knew and my family knew, and I
was really his only line of support. I'm a nurse
(05:54):
as well, and so that was helpful, but just something
that he couldn't do. He couldn't face telling other people,
and he just wanted to concentrate on fighting this disease
and he did and he beat it. And his family
know now, but they didn't know for a long time.
Speaker 1 (06:13):
How did they feel? Did the family tell you how
they feel it felt about it?
Speaker 6 (06:18):
Oh? One family member was upset with me for not
telling her when he was in hospital, but she understood
that that's what he wanted and she forgave. At the
end of the day. You know, you've got to focus
on you. It takes a lot of energy. I just
hope this lady has one person to lean on.
Speaker 4 (06:36):
Yeah, okay, so that would be your message to her.
Speaker 6 (06:39):
Yeah, just even just someone.
Speaker 4 (06:41):
Okay, yeah, it may in fact be us, Kayla of Kabucha,
what do you reckon?
Speaker 7 (06:48):
So this one is actually quite close to home as well.
And I just definitely think she doesn't need to go
through this alone. And all she has to do is
just retail to somebody that you know, she is confident
in sharing it with. She has been brave enough to
speak up to you, reach out to you, and go
and talk through her trauma. But I think everyone listening
(07:12):
today just wants to give her a big hug and
tell her to speak up. She doesn't have to go
through it alone.
Speaker 4 (07:19):
Lovely, Kayla, thank you.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
I'm seeing some of the other cause I producer putting
up go. You know you're not a burden. You need
to help with this.
Speaker 4 (07:27):
Yeah, okay, Well I'm just I'm waiting to see if
she wants to respond to any of this through my DMS.
But yeah, keep the cause coming. Thirteen one O sixty five.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Full Disclosure Exposure forgive Me Father, for ive sin.
Speaker 1 (07:40):
Our full disclosure no exposure. This morning is from a
lady who has a couple of massive secrets she's been
keeping from her family, and the most pressing I guess
is that she has terminal cancer and is dealing with
it alone.
Speaker 5 (07:54):
It's my choice. None of my family, all friends I
actually know about the cancer.
Speaker 4 (08:03):
I do not like to burden people, So everyone's been
calling through saying please just tell one person, just share
the burden of this, and she has now responded on
my DMS. She says, I totally understand what they are saying,
that I should have at least one person to help me,
But I think that brings me more stress because I
would be worried about how they will cope once I'm gone.
(08:26):
I'm at peace. I'm not scared.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
She's a very brave person, but she's been so strong
for so long, and people who are so strong for
so long don't like being seen to be needing help.
Speaker 4 (08:36):
Yeah, true, that.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
What do you think about I know this is about her, obviously,
but what about those family members, Like, for example, for me,
if my brother, if I found out that my brother
was dying and hadn't told me, I mean, I just
I would be so heartbroken by that.
Speaker 4 (08:52):
Yeah, but you'd also have to respect it, right, And
I do understand when she talks about it, and I
know this when Shaun was kind of in his final
month with his cancer, is that there is a piece
that comes with the acceptance and you then kind of
just want to go out and live the best life
you can. So for her, if her best life is
not burdening other people, I totally respect that. But Heidi
(09:16):
summer Ball, our counselor from Heidi's Counseling Service dot com,
You've been listening, Heidi, and you've got some really constructive
things to say. What do you reckon?
Speaker 3 (09:26):
Yeah, the first thing I'd say is she obviously has
a need to share this, or she wouldn't have contacted you.
So she has wanted to unburden. And I know that
she's talking about wanting to protect her family or saving
them from grief, but they are going to be grieving
and they're also now going to have shock. So actually
(09:47):
the ramifications of this afterwards for them are in some
ways harder because they're not going to get the opportunity
to show her love and care and to say farewell
to her. And at no point she said she's got
a bad relationship with her family in fact, because she
kept the secret about her daughter. What that tells me
is she cares about what her family thinks. And I've
(10:09):
seen this before where actually family members have resentment later
on because they were robbed of this time with them.
Speaker 4 (10:16):
But that's not going to be her problem, right. So
in the moment, all we're dealing with is how she
wants to deal with that. And if she doesn't want
to talk to the family, then doesn't she have that right.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
Yeah, But in her response to you, she said, I'm
worried that it's going to be hard for them once
I'm gone. So she does care about what it's going
to be like for them once she's gone. And what
I'm saying is that by withholding it, it's actually going
to be harder for them because not only they will
be grieving, they're going to have shock, They're going to
have confusion, They're not going to understand why. And I
(10:46):
also wanted to say, I would really like to offer
an appointment to this woman for free, obviously, even if
I have to come to her, just to work through
some of this and talk through some of this with her,
because she just hasn't had anybody to share it with.
And that's what therapy is. It's holding the space for
somebody with these really big, uncomfortable situations and scenarios and
(11:10):
how do.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
You will be all of the things you said about
a fai. It would be a lot to take on now,
But there are things that could be said to her.
She just doesn't realize people think about it and know
about it and the love they want to put to her,
which you know she needs to hear.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
Yeah, for herself, it sounds as though she's okay.
Speaker 7 (11:27):
With going through this alone.
Speaker 3 (11:28):
I think it's all right for her, But she's worrying
so much about other people and not wanting to burden them,
and to not the words she's using, I don't want
to burden other people. I don't want to cause them stress,
And so she's so concerned about caring for others. And
I guess the view that I'm offering is that, in fact,
it will be kinder to give them that opportunity to
(11:53):
say all these things, to not be left with questions
and wondering why and you know, weren't we supportive and
why wouldn't she give us the opportunity to tell us
how we feel to farewell her, to give us closure.
I honestly have seen this scenario and family members left
behind are hurt and they're confused.
Speaker 1 (12:13):
Well, let's hope she's hearing this and whats you reach
out and have this time with Heidi as well.
Speaker 4 (12:17):
She is hearing it, HAIDI, So if she wants to
get in contact, we will put you two together. But
the one thing I will say about this woman categorically
is she is incredibly brave.
Speaker 5 (12:27):
It's improvant.
Speaker 4 (12:27):
Terry and Kim on Brisbane's Chis ninety seventy three
Popular Podcasts
Good Game with Sarah Spain
Good Game is your one-stop shop for the biggest stories in women’s sports. Every day, host Sarah Spain gives you the stories, stakes, stars and stats to keep up with your favorite women’s teams, leagues and athletes. Through thoughtful insight, witty banter, and an all around good time, Sarah and friends break down the latest news, talk about the games you can’t miss, and debate the issues of the day. Don’t miss interviews with the people of the moment, whether they be athletes, coaches, reporters, or celebrity fans.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations.
The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show
The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show. Clay Travis and Buck Sexton tackle the biggest stories in news, politics and current events with intelligence and humor. From the border crisis, to the madness of cancel culture and far-left missteps, Clay and Buck guide listeners through the latest headlines and hot topics with fun and entertaining conversations and opinions.