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March 18, 2024 • 12 mins

The dirtiest sock and the cleanest throwbacks.

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Episode Transcript

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Speaker 1 (00:03):
Okay, welcome to the brand new edition of the podcast,
same podcast, different form.

Speaker 2 (00:09):
You're you're selling hard that this is going to be
like a permanent structure change.

Speaker 3 (00:14):
I'm just like, let's just ease into it. You know, Hey,
we're thinking today.

Speaker 2 (00:17):
We're just going to answer this question from these thought
provoking questions which you've heard.

Speaker 3 (00:21):
The question that we're answering if you heard the last part.

Speaker 4 (00:23):
And it should be on the name of this podcast
as well, which is the most awkward sexual encounter?

Speaker 2 (00:28):
Yeah, so we've had the weekend to not only get
some new.

Speaker 3 (00:32):
Awkward sexual encounters, but also think about historical encounters.

Speaker 1 (00:38):
It's a tricky one.

Speaker 3 (00:40):
Would you want me to kick things off?

Speaker 4 (00:42):
I'm interested to know what comes to mind in this
so in this area because it really is like.

Speaker 1 (00:49):
As a all.

Speaker 4 (00:51):
Of these stories for everyone, I feel, just bring up
memories and things that you want to forget. Awkward sexual
encounters are you often like, I don't know about you,
but there are so many for me that like I
just wouldn't have spoken about because I didn't speak to
the person about it at the time because it was
too awkward.

Speaker 1 (01:11):
Totally, it's so embarrassing.

Speaker 3 (01:13):
Pretend it never happened.

Speaker 4 (01:14):
And then later when you're catching up with your mates,
if you are talking about things that have come out
with you in the bedroom or like, you're never offering
the one that like happened to.

Speaker 3 (01:25):
Be awful totally right, totally.

Speaker 2 (01:28):
I just think the whole just a sexual encounter with
someone who probably early on, when the nerves are all there,
you you're all of a sudden, you're stripped nude in
front of this.

Speaker 1 (01:38):
It is the most vulnerably vulnerable. And then when it's
not going right.

Speaker 2 (01:42):
Right, and then because I think you've got a preconceived
idea in your head of hoy, you know, you think
it's going to go, and then it's a new person.

Speaker 3 (01:48):
Oh you're doing that. It's it's right for awkwardness.

Speaker 4 (01:52):
Can I like just maybe like I don't know how
I just remembered one of yours one way, Well, no,
that's not the way bring that up.

Speaker 1 (02:00):
I'm not going to bring it up, and just remember one.
I'm interested if you're going to bring it up.

Speaker 4 (02:04):
But one of the things that I think is worth
talking about, particularly as young guys in this sphere, is
like the whole condom thingumbling around with that is like
just the most hectic, awful thing like trying to get
used to that and trying to be cool and sexy

(02:27):
doing that. There's no training manual for that, and I
feel like you just I.

Speaker 3 (02:32):
Don't know you can You can trial in your own space.

Speaker 4 (02:34):
Yeah, you can trial on your own personally put in
a condom, And I kind of wish that I did because,
and I've said that out loud, it was.

Speaker 1 (02:42):
Hell always name what's that where you can.

Speaker 4 (02:46):
Have a posh they call it a posh w or
self pleasuring.

Speaker 3 (02:52):
To do it into a condom, not just a sock
from the draw because.

Speaker 1 (02:56):
It's quite posh.

Speaker 3 (02:58):
It almost makes it a bit regal.

Speaker 1 (03:00):
It's a posh one.

Speaker 3 (03:00):
There you go. Well, we weren't doing that.

Speaker 4 (03:02):
I wasn't doing that. I wasn't doing that, And even
if I was, I still don't think it would have
prepared me for the awkwardness that occurs when and it
would always like happen immediately if I was hooking up
with someone and thinking to myself, oh, you know, even
if we'd spoken about.

Speaker 1 (03:16):
It beforehand, that's where this is going. I'm coming over
for this whatever. It was just knowing that I would
have to have a stop down where I like put
it on. That just terrified me. I don't know why
it happened so nervous about it.

Speaker 2 (03:31):
I don't know why this has happened for me, because
I appreciate that it's a fifty to fifty getting it
on the right way, but I think ninety five percent
of the time.

Speaker 4 (03:37):
Fifty fifty giving it on the wrong way rather than
the peel down, and I would find myself.

Speaker 2 (03:42):
Just pushing down hard like this, it's just not unwrapping.
And I don't know, but nine times out of ten
I would be forcing my way through it, being like,
how have I got it around the wrong way again?

Speaker 4 (03:54):
Then with the unlubricated side on the outside, it should be.

Speaker 3 (03:59):
Like a like a black dot or something.

Speaker 1 (04:03):
Why is there not a label?

Speaker 2 (04:04):
But it's often dark as well, so I wouldn't even
see it again in the dark.

Speaker 1 (04:09):
But it should be like white side on the outsides.
Why how is that not a fact?

Speaker 3 (04:14):
But do you have memories of just like just pushing
and then.

Speaker 4 (04:17):
Having to get your thumbs underneath it, and then the
thumbs like you know, just to try and pull it
down on the outset when you knew what you got
it on, when you knew you had it on.

Speaker 1 (04:24):
The wrong way, but you didn't want to admit that
you had it on the wrong way.

Speaker 4 (04:27):
So like, it's still cool, it's still cool, and trying
to grab the insides of it and then pull it down.

Speaker 3 (04:33):
Never the inside.

Speaker 2 (04:34):
It was like I just kept like the rolls roll hard,
roller and then the whole time. And again for women listening,
you won't be able to relate to this, but like
you're also thinking, oh, I know, for me personally, I
was like, during this fumbling, I cannot lose my excite
exactly so I'm trying to I'm trying to do it quickly.

(04:55):
And then if you notice yourself losing your around, then
the colum even.

Speaker 3 (05:00):
Harder on the limp thing.

Speaker 1 (05:04):
This is not going to work exactly right, exactly.

Speaker 2 (05:07):
Right in the situation before where it's like during the
process of trying to get and then I think to myself,
what am I going to say here? Hey, really, just
while I was trying to do that, I've lost my direction.

Speaker 3 (05:21):
So we're back, We're back to square one.

Speaker 1 (05:25):
Just keep your breast.

Speaker 4 (05:27):
Rob Williams joke here where he says, like you you're
like they say to you, you know, are you good
to go he can and come on, and he's like, yeah,
maybe I gotta love glove. And then you're kind of like,
you know, coming around with it for a while, and
then all of a sudden, Uh, it's it looks like.

Speaker 1 (05:42):
A child.

Speaker 4 (05:43):
Your your penis looks like a child in an adults
diving suit, this pathetic looking thing, and again you're trying
to be sexy. Yeah, so that that instantly sort of
came to mind when I was thinking allchord sexual encounters.

Speaker 1 (06:04):
Was that must have happened to me ten class times.

Speaker 2 (06:08):
Most times rare that didn't happen. Yeah, but if we
go into specific city, I.

Speaker 4 (06:13):
Should say shout out to all of the wonderful women
in those situations who were patient and like kind during
that process, because that was always really nice as well.

Speaker 1 (06:21):
And they'd be like, hey, look, don't worry about it,
like you know.

Speaker 4 (06:23):
We'll think that we'll have another try again in like
you know one, come on down, we'll try again in
five minutes.

Speaker 3 (06:29):
You know, I got the superpack.

Speaker 1 (06:31):
I've always got easier. I should say, once that.

Speaker 3 (06:34):
Happened, has the value it was, it was the value
three extra.

Speaker 4 (06:38):
But it always got easier after you'd failed a couple, right,
because then because it almost became as soon as it
became funny and it was a joke between both of you,
it's like, oh, cool, we're relaxed about this. Now, I'm
not feeling as much pressure around this, whereas initially it
was like I've got to be James Bond here totally,
whereas by the end of it, I'd.

Speaker 3 (06:56):
Like to maintain the James bond.

Speaker 1 (06:58):
Well, there are no jokes here.

Speaker 3 (07:00):
I'm smooth silk, stop laughing.

Speaker 2 (07:03):
But I would find it uncomfortable is when clearly you
had noticed that the person that you're having intercourse with,
if we lose the excitement, they then feel like, oh,
you're not attracted to me, And that conversation is awful
trying to convince someone that no, it's not actually anything

(07:24):
you've done. It's just that I was putting a bit
of pressure and it's just like I'm not believing you.

Speaker 3 (07:29):
Oh my god.

Speaker 1 (07:30):
Yeah, but you're right.

Speaker 2 (07:31):
When you see someone for long enough you actually go, oh,
clearly you're into me.

Speaker 1 (07:38):
You want to keep seeing me. But it's just the
first night thing. It's just God, I.

Speaker 3 (07:43):
Can't imagine being a woman like that.

Speaker 2 (07:44):
It's such a there's such a visual and physical sign
that the man is a right.

Speaker 1 (07:49):
Yeah, there's no way. It's like a dog. It's like
a dog wagging its tail. They're pumped when they're wagging
their tail.

Speaker 3 (07:55):
They're happy to see that.

Speaker 2 (07:57):
Deflat I imagine women, it's just like, what did I like?

Speaker 3 (08:02):
There's nothing on hiding it is there.

Speaker 1 (08:04):
It's shocking, it's shocking. Yeah, that's that's a really good point.
You really you can't talk your way out of that situation,
you know.

Speaker 4 (08:12):
And even though I was listening to a chat with
a sex expert on direver CEO recently where she was
saying that.

Speaker 1 (08:20):
Men can be really, really really aroused and not have
an erection, I've been there like that.

Speaker 4 (08:27):
That is a real thing, because you're as soon as
your like problem solving brain sort of enters the equation
allow your fight or flight brain, whatever you want to
call it, your blood's not going there because it's got
to think out your heads, like no, no, no, that's
not a priority right now, mate. In fact, animalistically, the
last thing I want to be doing right now is

(08:47):
having sex because I'm trying to solve out this problem,
which you know, again with these old with this hangover,
this evolutionary hangover that we've got with these bodies.

Speaker 1 (08:56):
It's going, we can't have sex.

Speaker 4 (08:57):
Now, you know, there might be a same tooth tiger
that's coming out to get us, and that's to the
tiger is a condom you can't put on properly.

Speaker 1 (09:03):
But it's still the thing that's not letting you perform.
So yeah, it is very awkward.

Speaker 3 (09:08):
And I think when I was a lot younger as well,
you think that you think that this can only work
if I.

Speaker 2 (09:14):
Had a an aroused piece, right, whereas the older you get,
you go, there's so much we can do, it doesn't
actually wire.

Speaker 4 (09:25):
Yeah, the pistol, I think the other thing. The pistol
I'm trying to that's good.

Speaker 1 (09:29):
Well, that words.

Speaker 4 (09:30):
I think the other thing as well is I always
thought that like in those really awkward moments early on
when it wasn't working for you. And again I've pinched
this from this chat with this psychologist I was listening
to on dire Ceo, but she was saying that a
lot of people when they.

Speaker 1 (09:45):
Have their first date or they have their first.

Speaker 4 (09:47):
Interaction with someone, they leave the date and if they
don't have this magic moment where they're like, that was amazing.
All I want to do is be with you and
have sex. Immediately they walk away and they go that
person's not it for me, and she was like, that
is just insane, because it's a perfect storm where you're

(10:08):
both awkward and weird and trying to figure each other out.
And if you have that standard, like, sure, it's great
when that does happen, but like you, a lot of
the time, that just means that you're holding this person
up to a standard they're never going to get to
and you're potentially missing out and hanging out with someone
really cool just because you didn't it wasn't perfect for
you on the first night.

Speaker 1 (10:28):
And she was like everyone, that was everyone.

Speaker 3 (10:31):
That's what we're see in movies. Yes, they want to
rip each other's clothes off.

Speaker 2 (10:35):
They can't even get in the car.

Speaker 3 (10:39):
That's just not the case.

Speaker 1 (10:40):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (10:41):
Yeah, Well, anyway, she'd get to some specific horrific encounters.
Now obviously out of respect, there will be no oh tomorrow,
sorry I'm getting wrapped.

Speaker 1 (10:51):
Or do you want to do it tomorrow?

Speaker 2 (10:52):
The well, I'm not may I'm getting wrapped. I was
loving this chat. We should you want you want to
hit it?

Speaker 1 (10:57):
Tomorrow. It's been a good it's been a really good
conversation chat.

Speaker 2 (11:02):
So tomorrow we'll go into more specifics Most Awkward Sexual
Encounter Part two with specific actual sexual encounters.

Speaker 4 (11:10):
Yeah, okay, obviously no names. Probably a changing of dates.
It might have be a changing of genders. Who knows.

Speaker 2 (11:17):
So okay, I'll give you a little bit just to
get you there tomorrow.

Speaker 1 (11:25):
Flames Flames mine for yours was something else.

Speaker 3 (11:29):
I've got a.

Speaker 4 (11:29):
Few one for you which is all time, but we'll
talk about it off podcast and then maybe it might
make its appearance.

Speaker 1 (11:38):
Mine is how are valium?

Speaker 4 (11:44):
Yeah yeah, flames and valium involves and you'll be able
to hear that tomorrow on the new form BTS.

Speaker 2 (11:52):
Well, we're not calling it a new fox it. We
were just mucking around doing something a bit different today.
And if we keep doing like it and cool if
we if we if we don't, then isn't it even
a thing?

Speaker 3 (12:02):
Let's not put pressure on it. Well, let's keep our arousal.

Speaker 1 (12:05):
It was actually nice, clean, clean callback. All right, we'll
see you tomorrow with that
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