DONKEY: 62-Year-Old Chef Robs Three Banks In A Single Day

Charlamagne Tha God gives Donkey of the Day to a 62-year-old chef who robbed three banks in a single day. Listen for more!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
Your execution on the Donkey of the Day is something
to God for you to read.

Speaker 2 (00:05):
He gave me Donkey other day and I deserve that.

Speaker 1 (00:08):
You need to know. You need to tell them, I am.

Speaker 2 (00:11):
You have to tell them it's time for Donkey of
the Day.

Speaker 1 (00:15):
It's a read. But you're so good at Charlamagne.

Speaker 2 (00:19):
He wants Charlamage as well. Damn Solomame, Who do you
give a dusky other day?

Speaker 1 (00:25):
Soon? Now? Don't you hate when Instagram makes you question
your choices? Like I reported them? People? You know the
people that leave the spam that says, I wonder why
people go to the bathroom when they look at my pickets?
So I reported as new toy and Instagram going to
ask me about undiate eighteen. What that guy can do
with it? Had nothing to do with it, God damn it.
I reported it because I didn't want it anyway. Donkey

(00:46):
Today for Monday, September fifteenth goes to a sixty two
year old California chef named Valentino Luchin. Now we are
in the fourth quarter of twenty twenty five. You might
as well say we are in the holiday season, people, Okay,
Once Duncan Donuts put the pumpkins, spice items on the menu,
and spirit hollow wings stores start popping up we in
the holiday season, and both of those things have happened already.
So the holiday season is here, and a lot of

(01:06):
people pick up extra work during the holiday season. Okay,
a lot of people have to work two in three
jobs to pay for the holidays. Okay. Last holiday season
twenty twenty four, there was a survey done by side
hustles dot com that found seventy eight percent of Americans
are either already side hustling or planning to pick up
a side gig to afford their holiday expenses. Of those responses,

(01:29):
fifty nine percent already have an extra job and another
nineteen percent plan on starting one. Well, Chef Valentino Luchin
is one of those people who decided to pick up
another gig for the holidays. Would you like to know
what other gigs Chef Valentino Luchin picked up for the holidays, Well,
let's go to trending news for the report police.

Speaker 2 (01:45):
If your chef's hat looks suspiciously like a disguise, you
might be a bank Robert. If you're serving up soup
FLEs one day and subpoenas the next you're definitely in trouble.
This is the story of Valentino Lucian, a man who
switched from fine dining to felony. On September tenth, twenty
twenty five, San Francisco police raced to a bank on
Grand Avenue. The suspect not your usual masked villain, but

(02:06):
Valentino luchin A known for his pasta not his pilfering.
He handed the teller a threatening note, grabbed the cash,
and vanished. But the city's finest and some sharp eyed
locals didn't let him get far Thanks to they tracked
him down and arrested him. No drama, no car chase,
just a chef caught off menu. Here's the real twist.
Investigators linked lucinto same methods, same chef's touch. Now, instead

(02:28):
of plating up Risotto, Luchen's facing a full serving of
charges at the County jail in San Francisco. Crime doesn't pay,
but it sure makes a wild story.

Speaker 1 (02:36):
Sixty two years old and decided he wanted to rob
three banks in one day, proving you're never too old
to make bad decisions. It pains me to have to
say this, but you should never trade your spatula for
a ski mask. Okay. When you have a legitimate job, okay,
a legitimate skill set that can make you money, you
never ever, ever, under any circumstance, trade that for a

(02:58):
life of crime. Some of y'all don't appreciate the positions
God has put you in, and you always let the
devil convince you that you need more and you need
it now, instead of just being patient and letting the
gifts God gave you make room for you when the
time is right. How you go from preparing risotto, preparing
to do twenty five to life at sixty two? Okay?
This isn't a young man, all right? This is how

(03:20):
I know wisdom requires more than just you know, living
a long life. Even fools grow old. This man had
a legitimate job, a legitimate skill, a job that, depending
on employment type, could get in benefits and health insurance.
But he said, you know what I'm really missing a
federal indictment. Okay. What bothers me the most about this
is when you read more into the story. In twenty eighteen,

(03:43):
he was arrested on suspicion of armed robbery at a bank.
Back then he was fifty four, and he said, in
a jailhouse interview that he robbed the bank back then
because at the time he thought it was a good plan.
So from fifty four to sixty two, Chef Valentino hasn't
learned the damn thing about what's a good plan or
not forget farm the table. He went from kitchen to prison.

(04:04):
So now instead of worrying about a potential South Flee collapse,
you gotta worry about a rectal prolapse. Please give Valentino
luching the sweet sounds of the Hamiltons. Oh no, you
are the dog.

Speaker 2 (04:17):
Of the day, the doge.

Speaker 1 (04:24):
All the day. Yee. And if you're wondering what erectal
prolapse is, it's a condition would erect them the last
part of the large intesting protrudes through the anus. That's
crazy sixty two. No, thank you, Yeah, we weren't wondering. Yeah,

(04:45):
that's crazy. Three banks in one day, crazy sixty two.

Speaker 2 (04:49):
He said, you know what I'm missing a federal.

Speaker 1 (04:51):
Indict Three banks in one day, man, that's crazy, all right,
Well they got a job, Yeah, that's what that's crazy.
All right? Well, thank you for that, donkey. Today. Now
when we come back, Jasmine Cracker will be joining us,
so we're gonna kick it with her next uncle anywhere.
It's the Breakfast Club.

Speaker 2 (05:08):
Good morning. The Breakfast Club.

Speaker 1 (05:13):
Donkey Today is sponsored by renowned personal injury attorney Michael
to Bull. Lamb is soft. Don't be a donkey when
you need a fighter on your side. If you're ever injured,
go to Michael to Bull dot com. That's Michael to
Bull dot com. And when you mess with the bull,
you get the horns.