May 18, 2023 • 38 mins
The star and newbie of Summer House on Bravo TV, Samantha Feher, who is also the co-founder of @FeherAgency stops by Chanel in the City to chat with host, Chanel Omari on all things Summer House this season.
Samantha opens up about her being new in the house and how she coped with fitting in and how to take care of your mental health no matter what enviorment youre in. She dishes on tips on how to fit in to a summer house or any type of group you are new to. Samantha also chats her relationship with her new man, Corey, who is also in the house and how she managed to get him to be in an exclusive relationship and not just a fling. Samantha gives us tips on how to date in the summer and just in general in the big city.
Samantha shares with us what her overall experience is at the Summer House this summer and who she bonded the most with and who she feels she wants to continue working out bonds with. She opens up why its so hard for her to make new friendships at times and how she overcame it in a positive way!
Samantha also shares her thoughts on Lindsay Hubbard and Carl Radke's relationship and what she predicts for Danielle and Lindsay's future friendship. We also get an inside peak to what we can expect for the reunion.
Samantha also shares the essentials we should pack with us when we are sharing a Summer House and her favorite places to dine and wine at that Chanel in the City should check out!
You can tune in to Summer House every Monday night at 9PM EST on Bravo TV
Make sure to follow the beautiful and talented Samantha Feher @SamanthaFeher on all social media platforms.
Samantha opens up about her being new in the house and how she coped with fitting in and how to take care of your mental health no matter what enviorment youre in. She dishes on tips on how to fit in to a summer house or any type of group you are new to. Samantha also chats her relationship with her new man, Corey, who is also in the house and how she managed to get him to be in an exclusive relationship and not just a fling. Samantha gives us tips on how to date in the summer and just in general in the big city.
Samantha shares with us what her overall experience is at the Summer House this summer and who she bonded the most with and who she feels she wants to continue working out bonds with. She opens up why its so hard for her to make new friendships at times and how she overcame it in a positive way!
Samantha also shares her thoughts on Lindsay Hubbard and Carl Radke's relationship and what she predicts for Danielle and Lindsay's future friendship. We also get an inside peak to what we can expect for the reunion.
Samantha also shares the essentials we should pack with us when we are sharing a Summer House and her favorite places to dine and wine at that Chanel in the City should check out!
You can tune in to Summer House every Monday night at 9PM EST on Bravo TV
Make sure to follow the beautiful and talented Samantha Feher @SamanthaFeher on all social media platforms.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:05):
Hey, everyone, Welcome back toanother episode of Chanel in the City on
iHeartRadio. I'm your host, ChanelaMari and I have a very special guest
here with me. She is thestar of Bravo TV Summerhouse, one of
our favorite shows, airing every Mondaynight at nine pm, so make sure
you check that out. She isthe creator and founder of Fair Agency.
Please help me welcome our entrepreneur,our beautiful friend, talented, funny,
(00:28):
charismatic, amazing, one of ourfavorites, Samantha Fair. How are you,
Chanel. I'm so glad to behere. Thank you so much for
having me. I'm very excited totalk to you. I'm so happy.
First of all, we all fellin love with you on Summer House this
season. You are new this season, but talk to us about like your
experience on the show. I mean, it's kind of crazy. It's a
(00:52):
regular sharehouse, right, So ifyou've ever done like the broke kid going
out into the Hampton's share in aroom with four girls, like sharing a
bathroom with twenty girls, like,you know what it is. But the
difference with this house, Hey,the stakes are a little bit higher because
we're followed around by a camera crewall the time and be We've just got
a ton of like super major personalitiesin that house, which I don't think
(01:15):
is normal for every single friend ofgroup. We just happened to get like
the craziest, biggest personalities I've evermet in my life. But you know,
it's a place where I feel likeI fit in very well. It
was very easy for me to integrateinto this group because I'm fucking insane,
So I think, you know,it was a crazy experience, but a
(01:36):
very special one and one that Iwill always look back on fondly. Tell
us a little bit for the audience, like how did you get involved in
this friend group? Right? Becausethey're very tight knit, So how did
you get involved in this situation?I was loosely acquainted with Amanda just from
being creatives in the city. Wejust would run into some of the same
circles. We would do some ofthe same work, and at one point
(02:00):
we were hanging out and she waslike, I gotta say, like,
now that I'm getting to know youa little more, you are literally just
the same personality as my husband.Like it's almost it's insane, Like,
you guys have to meet I thinkyou would get along with my friends really
well, Like, do you evergo out to the Hampton's in the summer?
And I was like, yeah,every summer and she's like, why
don't you do it with us?It's a little weird, but I think
(02:21):
you're gonna like it, and therest is history. I love that,
you know, when I there wasa scene in this season that I really
related to you, I think alot of people did. When you felt,
you know, you were having avulnerable moment and you felt like you
said, you said something like,I feel like I talk a lot or
I feel like I'm not tolerated ornot seen, and I just want you
(02:43):
to know that a lot of peoplefeel that way. So thank you for
sharing that, because I think sometimeswhen people don't share that, people will
see you and they think your lifeis perfect and that nothing's wrong. Right.
So it was just interesting to mebecause I didn't even see that about
you, but yet you're feeling thesefeelings and I'm like, oh my god,
Like I feel that way sometimes ina group of people, you know,
and so sometimes I like to takea step back where I don't let
(03:04):
my shot. You know, Idid my shine right, So yeah,
I'm both to us a little bitabout what you were going through exactly in
that scene, like why you feltthat way. Maybe there's things we didn't
seen in contexts yet, you know. Yeah, I mean listen, I've
kind of been hearing my whole lifethat I'm loud, Like I'm the girl
who gets shushed like when she's talkingtoo much always. I feel like you
(03:25):
have such a happy balance, liketo me, like it's like I see
you as like a happy balance,you know what I mean. Just say,
I definitely insert myself. I definitelyI can ramble, like I can
get I can lose the plot sometimes, I guess, is what I'm saying.
And my whole life I've kind ofheard like, oh, you have
a really big personality, like oh, she's a lot, like oh,
(03:46):
it's very extra, it's very loudto like to talk all of those things.
And I had this like one Xin particular, who really just kind
of beat it into me that likebeing too much was a really bad thing,
and especially I think since that relationship. I was eighteen, I think
when he said that to me,so I was in like kind of a
very vulnerable growing up time in mylife when like that was the worst thing
(04:11):
I could have possibly heard, andafter that it just became like an an
underlying insecurity of mine. And Ihave the kind of personality that, like,
for the most part, I justforget about it and do my thing
and I'm just myself. But whensomeone kind of calls it out, I
remember that part of me and thatnot everybody likes it, and that it's
not for everyone, and it's justone of those very few things that's so
(04:34):
raw, like such a button forme that if you push it, I
get emotional because it brings up somuch of hearing that I'm too much of
feeling like, you know, whocould ever possibly want more of me because
I'm already giving too much, Likethey're already over it after like two minutes
of getting to know me, Andthat's a really shitty feeling. So you
(04:57):
know, I'm glad that doing thatown care like it was hard, but
I'm glad that it made other peoplefeel seen like the people who have experienced
the same thing. And you know, I mean as far as like sad
difficult things to go through on TV, that's definitely not like the worst of
them. So um, you know, I feel I feel lucky that maya
approached me in the way that shedid, because I really think it came
(05:18):
from a place of wanting to helpme out. But yeah, I mean
it. It was hard to livethrough. It was hard to watch back,
and it's something that I'm still kindof working through, you know today.
Well, I have to say youwere super graceful too with the girls,
like you totally felt you know.I think we have to come more
to that place of not being combativeand realizing sometimes people don't want to help
(05:39):
and even though they don't know howto, sometimes it hurts you. But
you were like taking it in andby the way, I feel you too.
I had an X. We've allhad an X that has has told
me I'm too much and this andthat. And let me tell you something,
it's because they're too little. Theylike, yeah, don't deserve you.
They don't want you to like beout there being the center of attention.
It's also like a big our systemthing, Like if you're worried about
(06:00):
someone else being too much, you'reworried about the attention not being on you.
Like this guy was pretty messed up, and I know that now.
I think when I was eighteen,I was super vulnerable to that feedback in
that comment. But you know,looking back on it now, I'm really
proud of how much I give.I never leave it on the table,
you know. I give. Igive every single thing that I have to
(06:23):
give, and I'd rather be likethat. I love that. Don't ever
change a thing about you. I'mobsessed with you. We're all how What's
so you come in yourself pretty muchyour full self? Was that challenging?
Were you little nervous or were youlike, no, I'm going I'm going
into the summer house myself on cameraoff camera. It doesn't matter to me,
love me or hate me. Like, it's just so admiring, you
(06:45):
know, and it's refreshing that youdidn't have to be someone you weren't and
you can tell Yeah. I mean, I think I always go in as
me, and I think once youget kind of a read on like the
vibes, then you can kind offind how who you are in that group
of friends, right, Like Ialways come in as like the raw's purest
version of me. See if thatworks, and then like you know,
(07:05):
you kind of just you adapt tothe environment and you adapt to the group
of friends. You end up findingyour place and then you know, settling
in a little bit, and maybeyou don't need to be as like extra
and crazy as you work before.Like maybe I was coming on a little
strong when I first got in there, trying to like make friends. But
you know, this group of friendsis crazy. There's a lot of big
(07:27):
personalities. We all get along sowell, we fight like hell too,
Like we're literally a family. Soyou know, for me, I think
everybody else's big, crazy personalities gaveme permission to have my really big one
too. I never felt like wewere all competing for attention or for spotlight.
It felt like such an energy matchright from the get and I think
(07:50):
that's part of why that comment frommy surprise to me, I was like,
oh, like I actually thought thiswas working, and I felt myself
kind of taking it down and notto the next couple of weeks and like
not participating as much or like notlike laughing as loud or you know whatever.
And I think when I really gotback to being myself is when I
(08:11):
had the best summer. That's whenI started getting really close to people.
That's when I met Corey. Likeit just goes to show that like none
of the best things will happen ifyou're not being yourself, and you have
to be true to yourself in orderfor all the things to come to you.
So I think at this point I'vedone a lot of like growing through
that insecurity of mine and I reallydo credit these people for helping me kind
(08:35):
of remember who I am and rememberthat it's a good thing. Yeah,
that was going to say, likedo you feel the Summer House helped to
cope with with the breakup? Youknow, like we all look for that
like healing, like that happiness,the silver the silver lining, which I'm
still, by the way, girllooking for where you're like, let me
block out that noise, like whoI am is okay? You know?
(08:56):
Yeah? I mean I had brokenand put that X years ago, So
the relationship wasn't super raw. Itwas just kind of that one comment,
that lingering, right, that lingeringinsecurity that he kind of planted in me.
And so I definitely feel like itwas a healing experience to like be
in that house and be fully myselfand be rewarded for it. That made
(09:18):
it so that like if someone cameto me now and said I was too
much, I would just blow itoff. I'd be like I don't care
versus like I think before the summerI mean, you saw me get really
emotional when Maya brought that up,So I definitely think it's it's been a
real growing experience. I love that. Any tips that you can help us,
you know, we talk about alot of mental health on the podcast.
(09:39):
Any tips that you that works foryou, you know, whether it
was through filming or the summer houseor in general, just like coping with
triggers like that, you know,coping with like wait a minute, I'm
not going to be quiet just becausesomeone told me to, because I do
that all the time, Like someonetit tells you to take a step back
all of a sudden, I'm aghost. And then it yeah, procrastinate
your life. It's like your dreamsand why should you be that person when
(10:01):
everybody else is dreaming and being thecenter of attention, you know, it's
almost like Bulliand to me, yeah, it's like interesting, like the conversation
because we talk about that in thepodcast of like I always say, there's
no real answer. My guests comeup. They're the experts. They kind
of come up with what, likeyou know, helps them. Yeah,
I would say there are a coupleof things. Like one of them,
social media can be a real triggerfor me, like and it's ironic because
(10:24):
it's literally my job, but likeI don't go seeking out like what people
are writing about me on the internet, Like if I'm feeling like, oh,
I really need to know like whatpeople think of this thing I said
or did because I'm like overthinking itin my head. And that'll at least
like put an end to that.I'll like text one of my friends and
be like, oh, can yougo and look and see like the general
vibe like right now on this becauselike I'm panicking about it. Yeah.
(10:45):
Otherwise, I say off of socialmedia when I'm feeling like triggered or defensive
or like backed into a corner orjust like not in a great mental space.
Another one is building a support systemof people who like remind you who
you are at your core. Ifeel very lucky that there were a lot
of people in that house who weregood at that, Like my mom is
always there, Like I've always gotmy mom to remind me of that and
(11:05):
make me feel good about myself.Danielle was a major, major hype girl.
When I was like feeling down aboutit. She was so supportive and
helped me like get through that.Same with Gabby, I mean Amanda really
like all the girls kind of werelike hey, hey, like we're like
all kind of being silly, butlike we love you and we love your
personality, Like don't stop for us. We just didn't want you to feel
(11:28):
like, you know, we weretalking shit basically, So make that support
system because those people are great tolean on when you're feeling like really isolated
by that experience. And then Iwould say the last one for me in
particular, is like sticking to areal life routine outside of like your group
of friends or whatever. It islike I like wake up in the morning
(11:48):
at the same time and make mysame breakfast, and I go to the
gym, I go, like getmy ten thousand steps. I like come
here, like I make lunch,I go, you know whatever it is
like for me right now, myroutine is very much like cooking at home,
working out, going on like walksout in nature. Like sometimes I'm
not depressed your stressed out. I'mjust I've been inside for like six hours,
(12:09):
like and that's too long for me. So like sometimes you literally just
need like the sunlight on your skinand like that vitamin D. I mean
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True Bill. Take control of yoursubscriptions and finances. Now back to
the podcast. But you do youneed that sunlight? It's sometimes what Yeah,
me too. And sometimes I'm insideand I'm like I need I'm like
depressed, I need happiness. I'ma happy person. I want to be
happy. So you're I think weforget that, you know, So it's
good that you're reinforcing that. Outof all the girls, you know,
(14:18):
I know, they all embraced youpretty pretty much. So who do you
feel like you were the closest too? And I'll let you know. I
mean, we're seeing we're seeing youbeing getting close to Lindsey Hubbard, which
I love this sisterhood between you two, this best friendship that's about. I
mean that you guys seem close andI like it, and I love it,
and and I think that it wasreally sweet to see you there for
(14:39):
her in these moments when you guysdidn't know each other that well, but
you kind of came as this likesister nurturing like I got you, I
get you. I'm here to listento you, and I'm also here to
I like how I'm saying. Youdon't fight. I like how you communicate.
You don't take sides. You're veryrational, and that's how everybody should
be. It's not about to sidesfor friendships. For breakups. Everybody's on
(15:01):
this thing. Same with my X. It's like, let's take sides,
you know, because I'm insane.A comedy never, Yeah, it's never.
It's not black and white. Andthat's the problem is if you're just
gonna like sit there and take sides, then you're ignoring all the nuance,
and you're ignoring like all the differentthings that have happened in that you know,
particular situation and just kind of likeputting a blanket statement on it.
(15:22):
And that's not fair because there aretimes when, like say, you're like
team Danielle, right, there aretimes when Danielle was right. There are
also times when Danielle was wrong,and we don't just excuse all of the
like wrong things on either side forthe sake of like saying we're on a
team. Like, Ultimately, ifwe want these girls to resolve their issues
and become friends again, which weand I in particular really do, then
(15:43):
like everyone needs to take accountability forlike what they're fucking up, and then
they also need to like listen tothe other person hearing them out, talk
it through, and then also likefeel validated in their feelings and their actions
when they're doing the right thing.And I, by the way, actually
like that's being a good friend.Yeah, that's actually being a fair good
friend. Yeah, like we're notdoing blind loyalty in this house. Also,
(16:07):
like I had just met them,so I was like, I'm not
blindly loyal to anyone. I justmet you guys. So I do think
like that gave me and Gabby,especially like an opportunity to be mediators because
we had started getting close with bothof them, and now I am like
happy to report that I think theyare on the path to reconciliation. So
that is really amazing to see.But yeah, I mean, listen,
(16:30):
a lot of shit goes down inthese friend groups, and it's our job,
like if we're going to be putin the middle of it, to
make sure that everybody comes out feelingseen and heard, but also taking accountability
for times when they messed up,and they did a really good job of
that. I think at the reunion, I think there was some really clear
communication, and like I think I'ma pretty good communicator. Like I think
(16:52):
the hardest thing for me is talkingabout my own feelings. But when I'm
talking about like other situations and otherpeople's things, I think sometimes you're just
too close to it when it's yourown stuff. Like they weren't communicating very
well this summer, but I thinkit's just because it was so raw.
It was all happening at the sametime. They were like really upset,
and like, when you're just thatclose to it, it's very hard to
separate like the logic and like therational thoughts from like what you're feeling.
(17:17):
So I do think like that allowedme and Gabby to kind of mediate a
little bit and help them kind ofget back on the right track. But
anyway, to answer your original question, sorry, I'm a big side,
No, this is important. Toanswer your original question, I would say
I'm the closest with Gabby. Imean we talk every single day. We
do everything together. I was outwith her till five o'clock this morning at
(17:38):
a heart so like we do everythingtogether. We're inseparable, of course,
Corey, I mean you know that. I feel like that's on a different
level. So I don't even youknow, think of that when I'm talking
about like how close I am topeople in the house, and you know,
I really truly have had very likeclose and growing relationships with almost everyone.
(18:00):
I mean, Paige and Amanda,Like everyone just kind of plays different
roles, right, Like Amanda isalmost like a mom big sister to me.
Page is like a big sister,Like she's so good at giving advice,
and she's like such a girls girl, like so loyal to her girls.
Kyle has also been like very fatherlyto me, like he gives me
advice all the time. He's alsoan entrepreneur, so like I lean on
(18:22):
him for stuff like that. Carlhas been so kind and like he has
he's very like sensitive, so likewe talk about our feelings a lot,
you know, Like I've had areally great experience with these people, and
I feel like I'm close with allof them. But I think, you
know, if we're talking about,like day to day, who I'm talking
to all the time, I wouldsay, I'm talking to Gabby all the
(18:44):
time. I'm obviously talking to Coryall the time, but I'm talking to
Gabby all the time. And thenI would say Lindsay and Danielle have gotten
just the farthest out of their wayto make me feel really close to them
and to feel very like special andlike loved as a friend. And that's
part of why it's been really hardto watch them kind of find that rift
in their relationship, But I'm veryoptimistic that it's on the mend now and
(19:07):
I'm just really looking forward to ata time when we can all be best
friends and like have a crazy summertogether. Well on that note, yeah,
talking about wanting your friends that you'reclose with, I've been in this
revolve, been in this situation whereyou want them to get along. How
was it for you? No,Like, I don't know if you're a
people pleaser like I kind of am, so Like, was it hard for
you though to tell Danielle and lindsaywhen they were wrong and when they needed
(19:30):
to hear one another, Like wereyou ever scared or nervous? Like this
might turn on me? And rightnow I can't afford that because I'm,
you know, the new person,not that And by the way, everyone
listening though, That's what we needto take away from that stigma. What
you've helped us learn is like,it doesn't matter if you're new or not.
It's about human decency first and foremost, and treating everyone with respect and
like getting to know that person andwanting to accept them. But at the
(19:52):
same time, like you said,not holding one thing you tell a friend
against you for the rest of yourtime together, you know what I mean.
Yeah, I'm not great at confrontation. If I'm being honored, like
it makes me uncomfortable. Like Iyou know, I'm happy to speak up
when I'm really feeling hurt and Ineed to like talk things out. I'm
not a fighter. I'm not ayeller like Danielle and Lindsay get they get
(20:14):
volume when they like get hot onsomething or when they get upset about things,
and they're very direct communicators, Whereaslike, sometimes that makes me like
very intimidated and uncomfortable. So therewere definitely times when like I was just
monitoring like the situation and trying notto like upset anyone and like tiptoeing a
little bit. But that said,like what trump's all of it? To
(20:36):
me, the most important thing isthat they find a way back to each
other. So like sometimes I haveto be uncomfortable, like and that's you
know, sucks in the moment,But the reward, the payoff of that,
if it can help them get backto a place where they can be
friends, it's totally worth it,right, Like the intention is pure and
that's all that matters that it's comingfrom you. If they know that,
that's when it's okay. I feel, yeah, just direct and honest.
(20:57):
And I'm not like a big likereceipts. I'm learning through the problem received
a receipts girl, I'm learning thatI have to do that. But like
for me, like what I leavethese experiences with is like a feeling and
like knowledge of like how everyone feltleaving that situation. And like maybe in
the future I'm going to be morereceipts girly, so I can like point
to facts when I'm trying to makemy points. I didn't realize that was
(21:18):
such a big thing, But like, I know how everyone is making each
other feel, and ultimately that's whatthe friendship is based on. The friendship
is not based on text messages,it's not based on you know, timestamps.
It is based on how everybody's makingeach other feel. And so that's
my priority is making sure that wecan kind of get to a place where
we all understand how we're making eachother feel and that we're all being really
intentional in like making sure our friendslike feel loved and supported. Amen.
(21:42):
That is really the most important.That's the goal that's where you get to
and I think that's where the mostmiscommunication. Of course a lot of people's
egos. I mean from your pointof view, because you've been there the
most out of all of us,you know, on and off camera,
What do you think was the root? It's not right. It's never about
the wedding or the engagement or thelittle stuff or that one thing. What
(22:03):
do you think really was the disconnectthat they weren't getting each other. I
think there were two things. There'swhat actually happened, and then there's the
communication about what happened. So whatactually happened I think is they were a
group of three friends, Carl,Lindsay, and Danielle, and the relationships
within a group of friends shifted andit created a dynamic that Danielle that made
(22:26):
her feel excluded, unloved, unattendedto. And that was like what happened.
That was like the action that occurred. Then the other problem was the
way they communicated about it. LikeDanielle to me didn't approach the communication the
right way with Lindsay, and Lindsaywas having a hard time hearing her thereafter
(22:49):
because then she was hurt by theway Danielle was acting, so it kind
of snowballed. And I honestly alwayssay this, like I think the initial
problem it was totally recovered, Likethis would have been very easy fixed to
me if the communication was good fromthe get go. But since the communication
was not good, the fallout endedup being much bigger, I think than
(23:10):
it ever needed to be. Likethis whole fight ended up becoming like so
much more heartbreaking than I think itneeded to be based on like what the
issue at hand actually was. Butyou know, I think people are going
to be happy that, like bythe end of the reunion in my opinion,
Like trust me, when I sayend, I mean end, like
(23:30):
really the last couple of minutes,so stick it out. But I think
by the end of the reunion thecommunication is so much clearer, and that
ultimately is like what creates that pathforward for them is like them just being
able to finally communicate about it,because like I said, I think if
they had started doing that from thebeginning, this would have been over at
a weekend. But I think alsolike, yeah, I also think boundary.
(23:52):
I think also knowing them personally andthen knowing like I get why Danielle
was hurt because it was the threeamigos, and I'm sure she wanted them
to be like, hey, Danielle, come with us, do this?
Do that. The thing that wedon't see too is I know Lindsay mentioned
it with Maya, where I've gonethrough this before so I can relate.
And it's very hard to tell yourbest friends or friends in general that are
(24:12):
girls that used to have a relationshipwith your with your new boyfriend or fiance
about boundaries. And that's something Ifeel Lindsay should have could have been more
clear maybe and then Danielle would haveunderstood, so she wouldn't have had that
many expectations of like, oh,I get it. They're not trying to
ic me out. It's just there'sboundaries. So once you accept that a
little bit more, it's easier.I don't know, I'm just saying it
(24:34):
becomes a lot of this boundary thing. Unfortunately when you become in a relationship,
I mean, yeah, and Ithink, how do you feel about
that? Do you have boundaries?Like? Are you that kind of terrible
at boundaries? I let everyone in. I'm like such a mushy lover,
like I just want everyone like I'mlike I'm putting it all out there,
right. I think if you're onreality TV, you are categorically bad with
(24:55):
boundaries, So like let's start thatas a baseline. But yeah, I
mean less. I think that thepath forward for them is going to be
not rehashing what's happened and not liketalking about like the actions and the hurt
and the communication, but instead it'sgoing to be setting expectations for the future.
Like I think at this point we'veall talked ad nauseum about the problems
(25:17):
and like what's happened in the past. Now we need to be solutions oriented
and set expectations where like what's thenext evolution of this friendship going to look
like? Because I think that's whathappened, is like there were there were
different expectations than what was being received. And so I think in the future,
being able to communicate directly about likewhat those expectations are and where the
(25:37):
boundary is, I think that isgoing to be how they ultimately come up
on the resolution. And I sointerrupt you, but I have a hard
stop into be off my way ifI'm just giving you a headslope, now,
thank you, Okay, We're goingto go now to your relationship with
Corey, which is an amazing,blossoming relationship. I'm so in love with
you two together. I think youguys are perfect together. Talk to us
(25:59):
a little bit about you know you'regoing into the summer house. You're not
looking for a relationship. Did youexpect any of this? No? No,
I mean the way summer always goesis I go in dating like four
or five guys, and I comeout dating four or five guys, sometimes
six or seven if it goes well. So, like, under no circumstances
did I expect to like find aboyfriend this summer, especially given the added
(26:21):
layer of like doing it on TVwith like these specific eleven people. Like,
what are the odds you're going tobring in one additional single man into
this house halfway through the summer andhe's going to be the man of my
dreams? The odds are slimmed none. So, Like, I meet this
guy who was like immediately writing himoff, I'm like, yeah, I'll
make out with him, We'll saywhatever. Now, like eight nine months
later, I like I can't stopthinking about him. I'm like, what
(26:44):
I just I really didn't see itcoming. But it was a very happy
surprise, so we see I know, I don't want to ruin this spoil
I don't want to spoil it becausewe still have a couple more episodes left
plus the reunion. But we dosee him confessing him liking you. Why
was it so important? Because Iknow as a woman it is it's important
for the guy that you like toactually confirm he likes you and you want
to be exclusive. So take usthrough, like what made you wanted like
(27:07):
at that point, or what madehim Why do you think he committed to
you out of like all the girlshe spent winter house in summer house with.
I mean, I just think we'reso compatible and we're so easy and
like it's just an instant chemical energymatch, Like we just we make each
other better, we make each otherlaugh, we can talk about more serious
(27:29):
things. We you know, wehave compatible lifestyles. Like it really just
checks all the boxes. I mean, it's almost like you can't really describe
what it is. It just works. And I think it's been a long
time since I felt like that ina relationship, hence the roster. And
I think for him, like again, like we're looking at this pool of
people in front of us and sometimesit's eleven people big and a lot of
(27:52):
those people like, I'm not datingthe girls in the house, so like
it is, you know, sometimes you're just like hooking up to hook
up. Sometimes you're just having funwhatever it is. Like the odds that
your person is in that group ofpeople is very slim. It's very low
odds. Um, and I thinkwe just got lucky that. You know,
I'm not a big like destiny Fateuniverse situation like person. That's not
(28:17):
really my vibe. But um,we got really lucky. That's amazing.
So you could say you're officially dating. Yes, ladies out there, you
got to stay away to Samantha,you're gonna tell me because for your ass.
Yeah, no, you guys aresuper cute. Give me a tip
(28:40):
to share with our audience when they'redating out there and they want to what's
your tip about like keeping the guyor attracting the guy like a quarry that
you want. You have to andthis is I sound like brokenacker, but
you have to be exactly yourself becauseif you base the relationship on a version
of you that you're creating for him, then you need to live in that
(29:00):
character that facade for the rest ofyour damn life. Like, if he
doesn't love you for who you are, then you are signing up for a
lifetime of misery. So like,I am someone who's never happy unless and
being completely myself, and Corey givesme complete permission and puts all his enthusiasm
behind me being myself. And there'sthe right person for you allows you to
(29:22):
be yourself and makes you a betterversion of that self. So you know,
I vehemently protest when people are likechanging things about themselves to be in
a relationship. Like compromise is verydifferent from what I'm talking about too,
Like, I just want to makethat clear, Like compromise is important changing
your personality and your values and likewhat you want and who you are to
(29:47):
be in a relationship. It neverworks out. So my advice is truly
truly be who you are and fuckingown it, because if that person doesn't
like it, someone else is goingto. And by being with this person
who prefers like fake made a versionof you, you are missing out on
the person who's going to love youfor you. I love that. So
you're an entrepreneur yourself. You actuallycame into the house. You're a very
(30:08):
well known writer in the fashion industryand you have your agency. Fair Agency
talked to us a little bit aboutboth being a career woman, being an
entrepreneur, playing hard, working hard. You know what inspired you to find
the agency. I love talking aboutthis stuff with our guests. Yeah,
I mean, my career has alwaysbeen like the number one thing in my
(30:30):
life outside of my friends and family. I have been very career focused.
I was always the girl who hadinternships and jobs in like high school and
college. Like that was me.And it's because I just found a passion
for like meeting people, building relationships, building communities. And when I was
a journalist, the way that manifestedwas like I started just building this network.
I got to learn about people,I got to interview people, I
(30:51):
got to communicate with people, Igot to like make friends within the industry
outside of the industry. It wasjust such a like relationship forward job.
And I love writing. It's justa passion of mine and something I think
I'm good at and it's a wayfor me to kind of communicate things and
share them with the world. Ilove that. But the way that turned
into the marketing agency is exactly whatI just said. It's all about community
(31:15):
building and relationships for me. Sowhen I left journalism to start this business,
it was all about making marketing humanagain. Like we're not the SEO
people. We're not doing like keywordvalue, Like that's not what we're what
we're doing. We're building relationships withcreators, We're building relationships with customers,
we're doing B to B partnerships,and all of it is focused on connecting
(31:37):
people with brands, products, otherpeople that we think are going to be
a great fit. And it's beensuper rewarding. It's something I'm really proud
of and something that I spend likeevery waking second thinking about. So you
know, it's really important to me. I love it. Where can everybody
follow you in the agency? Theycan follow me on Instagram. I always
(31:59):
say follow me in Stagram because that'swhere I post all the summer house,
like behind the scenes stuff I'm alwaysposting about, like me and Corey like,
so if you want to stay upto date, Instagram is definitely the
place for me. So my personalInstagram is just my name is Samantha Fair.
And then the agency is Fairy Agencyon Instagram, and you know,
our website is there and stuff,so you can check it out. I
love that. Can you give usa little bit of a tease? I
(32:21):
know I can't say much, butwhat we can look forward to the rest
of the season and for the reunion. I think you're just gonna see me
and Corey being a great fit andhaving some fun and getting to spend some
more time together. That was thelast couple of weeks. We're very special
for us because I think we reallysettled into kind of each other and found
ourselves in the relationship and started gettingexcited about what was to come after the
(32:42):
summer. You know, you'll seeLindsay and Carl experienced some joy, You'll
see them experience some pain. You'llsee Lindsay and Danyell really get to like
the hottest part of the of thebeef. You'll see Kyle making and ask
out of himself at some more parties, something that we all love to see.
(33:04):
That's my dad. You know,You'll see you'll definitely get at least
another party too, which is veryimportant to us. I know. And
in the end, I think whatreally kind of wraps it all up and
ties anice a little bow on itis going to be the reunion. I
think that will clear a lot ofthings up for people. It will be
you know, in the end,I think it creates the path forward for
(33:27):
reconciliation, and that's what we allwant is to be able to theoretically all
be in a house together next summer, having a good time and being friends.
So hopefully that's where this leaves us. Is there someone that you specifically
on your journey that you want totalk to share that you wanted to clear
up some things at the reunion.We're going to have to stay tuned for
that. But that we're missing ornot really. I mean, I was
(33:51):
just excited to kind of give theworld an update on me and Corey at
that. Yeah, we've been datingfor months by the time the reunion films,
Like we've traveled together, We've onholidays together, Like we've he's met
my parents, I've met his family, so you know, we we have
gotten a lot more serious and um, you know, slapped a label on
that thing, and you know,it was just fun to kind of be
(34:13):
able to give everybody the update onwhere we're at right now and how we're
just loving life. I love that. I love how supportive he is,
he that he loves that you areyourself and both of you. I think
this is gonna be a great couple. I can't wait till your wedding because
it's happening. I just said,I know it's happening. I'll crash it.
I'm gonna be like a girl.Okay, remember what he said.
(34:37):
Um no, we are so excitedto see this. I gotta tell you
when I watch you and Corey,you're my life, Like I forget anything
that happened in my past relationships andI'm like honored. There's a honored No
really, I mean it was themost unexpected thing to come out of this
summer. In my opinions, itisn't that amazing that when you have like
the least expectations then things happen.And I also loved how you like made
(35:00):
and court you in a way likeyou were like yeah you were Like last
two episodes, you're like not chasingLike no, Like I want you to
tell me in your own words whatyou want to do this relationship after the
summer, because at the end ofthe day, like it matters just as
much what he wants as what Iwant. And why does the girl always
have to be the one pushing therelationship. Bar I was going to say
that, now, how you feelabout me, maybe that's something we could
(35:22):
all try, right, Maybe weshould turn it around like you did with
a guy, because we're right,we're always the ones fighting and pushing and
labeling, right, and then youkind of like we're all scared of getting
hurt in the end. That's allit is. It's not that they don't
have the feelings, it's that sometimesthey're just afraid to talk about them because
it's it's scary. So I thinksometimes push gums to shove and it ends
(35:44):
up working out for the best ifit's meant to be. And how cool
is it that he is best friendswith Craig, which is Paige's boyfriend.
So do you guys do a lotof double dates as well? You know,
we're all traveling so much that wehaven't had a lot of time for
double dates lately, but we dolove spending time with them. We always
have fun when we're together. Thevibes are very high. So yeah,
we love Pagron Craig and we loveto like they're a very good example for
(36:06):
us to kind of understand how tonavigate the whole long distance thing, so
we're very grateful for our friendships withthem. What can we expect from your
journey? So what can we lookforward with you, like whether it's going
on season two in life, like, what would you like to share with
us that to clarify that you mighthave not shared on the season. I
mean, I'm an open book.There's nothing I'm keeping from you guys,
(36:28):
so you know it all. Idon't know yet about this coming summer.
If I get the call, I'llbe there. I had so much fun,
made some great memories, so Iwould never turn it down if it
came my way. I love that. And any advice for anybody doing reality
TV what you would share with thembe in therapy. I have a damned
therapist because this stuff is so hardand there's a very very small subset of
(36:52):
people who experience it right, Likemy group of friends is twelve of us
thirteen sometimes if Craig is in theroom, and those are the only people
who really understand what you're going through. But having someone like on the outside
of it, who's unbiased, whois whose entire job is to like help
you pick it apart and make senseof it, is so valuable and you
(37:14):
know it's twenty twenty three. Ifthere's still stigma around therapy, then you're
the problem, not the therapy.So that honestly, like just having the
people to talk to and having theright support system in place is the best
way to make sure that you arelike getting positivity out of the experience,
not getting caught up in your heador in all the extra bullshit, and
(37:35):
it allows you the space to likemake your friendships and live your life to
the full list in a way that'sreally healthy. I love it, And
Onchan on the City, we askevery guest before we wrap up, what's
your favorite place to recommend for usto check out in the city that you
love. Restaurant? Oh, mygoodness, for a restaurant right now,
I'm gonna say, go to Alba. It's a great Italian restaurant. It's
(38:00):
pretty new and the food is justspectacular. The vibes are immaculate. It's
really beautiful and like one of mynew favorite spots in the city. I
love it. Well. Samantha Fair, you are amazing. We love you.
We can't wait to follow you onyour journey. Thank you for being
on Shanel in the City. Thankyou so much. For having me.
This is so fun. Hey youguys, it's Sam from Summerhouse and today
(38:20):
you are listening to me with mygirls. Chanel A Mari on the Chanelle
in the City podcast
Hey, everyone, Welcome back toanother episode of Chanel in the City on
iHeartRadio. I'm your host, ChanelaMari and I have a very special guest
here with me. She is thestar of Bravo TV Summerhouse, one of
our favorite shows, airing every Mondaynight at nine pm, so make sure
you check that out. She isthe creator and founder of Fair Agency.
Please help me welcome our entrepreneur,our beautiful friend, talented, funny,
(00:28):
charismatic, amazing, one of ourfavorites, Samantha Fair. How are you,
Chanel. I'm so glad to behere. Thank you so much for
having me. I'm very excited totalk to you. I'm so happy.
First of all, we all fellin love with you on Summer House this
season. You are new this season, but talk to us about like your
experience on the show. I mean, it's kind of crazy. It's a
(00:52):
regular sharehouse, right, So ifyou've ever done like the broke kid going
out into the Hampton's share in aroom with four girls, like sharing a
bathroom with twenty girls, like,you know what it is. But the
difference with this house, Hey,the stakes are a little bit higher because
we're followed around by a camera crewall the time and be We've just got
a ton of like super major personalitiesin that house, which I don't think
(01:15):
is normal for every single friend ofgroup. We just happened to get like
the craziest, biggest personalities I've evermet in my life. But you know,
it's a place where I feel likeI fit in very well. It
was very easy for me to integrateinto this group because I'm fucking insane,
So I think, you know,it was a crazy experience, but a
(01:36):
very special one and one that Iwill always look back on fondly. Tell
us a little bit for the audience, like how did you get involved in
this friend group? Right? Becausethey're very tight knit, So how did
you get involved in this situation?I was loosely acquainted with Amanda just from
being creatives in the city. Wejust would run into some of the same
circles. We would do some ofthe same work, and at one point
(02:00):
we were hanging out and she waslike, I gotta say, like,
now that I'm getting to know youa little more, you are literally just
the same personality as my husband.Like it's almost it's insane, Like,
you guys have to meet I thinkyou would get along with my friends really
well, Like, do you evergo out to the Hampton's in the summer?
And I was like, yeah,every summer and she's like, why
don't you do it with us?It's a little weird, but I think
(02:21):
you're gonna like it, and therest is history. I love that,
you know, when I there wasa scene in this season that I really
related to you, I think alot of people did. When you felt,
you know, you were having avulnerable moment and you felt like you
said, you said something like,I feel like I talk a lot or
I feel like I'm not tolerated ornot seen, and I just want you
(02:43):
to know that a lot of peoplefeel that way. So thank you for
sharing that, because I think sometimeswhen people don't share that, people will
see you and they think your lifeis perfect and that nothing's wrong. Right.
So it was just interesting to mebecause I didn't even see that about
you, but yet you're feeling thesefeelings and I'm like, oh my god,
Like I feel that way sometimes ina group of people, you know,
and so sometimes I like to takea step back where I don't let
(03:04):
my shot. You know, Idid my shine right, So yeah,
I'm both to us a little bitabout what you were going through exactly in
that scene, like why you feltthat way. Maybe there's things we didn't
seen in contexts yet, you know. Yeah, I mean listen, I've
kind of been hearing my whole lifethat I'm loud, Like I'm the girl
who gets shushed like when she's talkingtoo much always. I feel like you
(03:25):
have such a happy balance, liketo me, like it's like I see
you as like a happy balance,you know what I mean. Just say,
I definitely insert myself. I definitelyI can ramble, like I can
get I can lose the plot sometimes, I guess, is what I'm saying.
And my whole life I've kind ofheard like, oh, you have
a really big personality, like oh, she's a lot, like oh,
(03:46):
it's very extra, it's very loudto like to talk all of those things.
And I had this like one Xin particular, who really just kind
of beat it into me that likebeing too much was a really bad thing,
and especially I think since that relationship. I was eighteen, I think
when he said that to me,so I was in like kind of a
very vulnerable growing up time in mylife when like that was the worst thing
(04:11):
I could have possibly heard, andafter that it just became like an an
underlying insecurity of mine. And Ihave the kind of personality that, like,
for the most part, I justforget about it and do my thing
and I'm just myself. But whensomeone kind of calls it out, I
remember that part of me and thatnot everybody likes it, and that it's
not for everyone, and it's justone of those very few things that's so
(04:34):
raw, like such a button forme that if you push it, I
get emotional because it brings up somuch of hearing that I'm too much of
feeling like, you know, whocould ever possibly want more of me because
I'm already giving too much, Likethey're already over it after like two minutes
of getting to know me, Andthat's a really shitty feeling. So you
(04:57):
know, I'm glad that doing thatown care like it was hard, but
I'm glad that it made other peoplefeel seen like the people who have experienced
the same thing. And you know, I mean as far as like sad
difficult things to go through on TV, that's definitely not like the worst of
them. So um, you know, I feel I feel lucky that maya
approached me in the way that shedid, because I really think it came
(05:18):
from a place of wanting to helpme out. But yeah, I mean
it. It was hard to livethrough. It was hard to watch back,
and it's something that I'm still kindof working through, you know today.
Well, I have to say youwere super graceful too with the girls,
like you totally felt you know.I think we have to come more
to that place of not being combativeand realizing sometimes people don't want to help
(05:39):
and even though they don't know howto, sometimes it hurts you. But
you were like taking it in andby the way, I feel you too.
I had an X. We've allhad an X that has has told
me I'm too much and this andthat. And let me tell you something,
it's because they're too little. Theylike, yeah, don't deserve you.
They don't want you to like beout there being the center of attention.
It's also like a big our systemthing, Like if you're worried about
(06:00):
someone else being too much, you'reworried about the attention not being on you.
Like this guy was pretty messed up, and I know that now.
I think when I was eighteen,I was super vulnerable to that feedback in
that comment. But you know,looking back on it now, I'm really
proud of how much I give.I never leave it on the table,
you know. I give. Igive every single thing that I have to
(06:23):
give, and I'd rather be likethat. I love that. Don't ever
change a thing about you. I'mobsessed with you. We're all how What's
so you come in yourself pretty muchyour full self? Was that challenging?
Were you little nervous or were youlike, no, I'm going I'm going
into the summer house myself on cameraoff camera. It doesn't matter to me,
love me or hate me. Like, it's just so admiring, you
(06:45):
know, and it's refreshing that youdidn't have to be someone you weren't and
you can tell Yeah. I mean, I think I always go in as
me, and I think once youget kind of a read on like the
vibes, then you can kind offind how who you are in that group
of friends, right, Like Ialways come in as like the raw's purest
version of me. See if thatworks, and then like you know,
(07:05):
you kind of just you adapt tothe environment and you adapt to the group
of friends. You end up findingyour place and then you know, settling
in a little bit, and maybeyou don't need to be as like extra
and crazy as you work before.Like maybe I was coming on a little
strong when I first got in there, trying to like make friends. But
you know, this group of friendsis crazy. There's a lot of big
(07:27):
personalities. We all get along sowell, we fight like hell too,
Like we're literally a family. Soyou know, for me, I think
everybody else's big, crazy personalities gaveme permission to have my really big one
too. I never felt like wewere all competing for attention or for spotlight.
It felt like such an energy matchright from the get and I think
(07:50):
that's part of why that comment frommy surprise to me, I was like,
oh, like I actually thought thiswas working, and I felt myself
kind of taking it down and notto the next couple of weeks and like
not participating as much or like notlike laughing as loud or you know whatever.
And I think when I really gotback to being myself is when I
(08:11):
had the best summer. That's whenI started getting really close to people.
That's when I met Corey. Likeit just goes to show that like none
of the best things will happen ifyou're not being yourself, and you have
to be true to yourself in orderfor all the things to come to you.
So I think at this point I'vedone a lot of like growing through
that insecurity of mine and I reallydo credit these people for helping me kind
(08:35):
of remember who I am and rememberthat it's a good thing. Yeah,
that was going to say, likedo you feel the Summer House helped to
cope with with the breakup? Youknow, like we all look for that
like healing, like that happiness,the silver the silver lining, which I'm
still, by the way, girllooking for where you're like, let me
block out that noise, like whoI am is okay? You know?
(08:56):
Yeah? I mean I had brokenand put that X years ago, So
the relationship wasn't super raw. Itwas just kind of that one comment,
that lingering, right, that lingeringinsecurity that he kind of planted in me.
And so I definitely feel like itwas a healing experience to like be
in that house and be fully myselfand be rewarded for it. That made
(09:18):
it so that like if someone cameto me now and said I was too
much, I would just blow itoff. I'd be like I don't care
versus like I think before the summerI mean, you saw me get really
emotional when Maya brought that up,So I definitely think it's it's been a
real growing experience. I love that. Any tips that you can help us,
you know, we talk about alot of mental health on the podcast.
(09:39):
Any tips that you that works foryou, you know, whether it
was through filming or the summer houseor in general, just like coping with
triggers like that, you know,coping with like wait a minute, I'm
not going to be quiet just becausesomeone told me to, because I do
that all the time, Like someonetit tells you to take a step back
all of a sudden, I'm aghost. And then it yeah, procrastinate
your life. It's like your dreamsand why should you be that person when
(10:01):
everybody else is dreaming and being thecenter of attention, you know, it's
almost like Bulliand to me, yeah, it's like interesting, like the conversation
because we talk about that in thepodcast of like I always say, there's
no real answer. My guests comeup. They're the experts. They kind
of come up with what, likeyou know, helps them. Yeah,
I would say there are a coupleof things. Like one of them,
social media can be a real triggerfor me, like and it's ironic because
(10:24):
it's literally my job, but likeI don't go seeking out like what people
are writing about me on the internet, Like if I'm feeling like, oh,
I really need to know like whatpeople think of this thing I said
or did because I'm like overthinking itin my head. And that'll at least
like put an end to that.I'll like text one of my friends and
be like, oh, can yougo and look and see like the general
vibe like right now on this becauselike I'm panicking about it. Yeah.
(10:45):
Otherwise, I say off of socialmedia when I'm feeling like triggered or defensive
or like backed into a corner orjust like not in a great mental space.
Another one is building a support systemof people who like remind you who
you are at your core. Ifeel very lucky that there were a lot
of people in that house who weregood at that, Like my mom is
always there, Like I've always gotmy mom to remind me of that and
(11:05):
make me feel good about myself.Danielle was a major, major hype girl.
When I was like feeling down aboutit. She was so supportive and
helped me like get through that.Same with Gabby, I mean Amanda really
like all the girls kind of werelike hey, hey, like we're like
all kind of being silly, butlike we love you and we love your
personality, Like don't stop for us. We just didn't want you to feel
(11:28):
like, you know, we weretalking shit basically, So make that support
system because those people are great tolean on when you're feeling like really isolated
by that experience. And then Iwould say the last one for me in
particular, is like sticking to areal life routine outside of like your group
of friends or whatever. It islike I like wake up in the morning
(11:48):
at the same time and make mysame breakfast, and I go to the
gym, I go, like getmy ten thousand steps. I like come
here, like I make lunch,I go, you know whatever it is
like for me right now, myroutine is very much like cooking at home,
working out, going on like walksout in nature. Like sometimes I'm
not depressed your stressed out. I'mjust I've been inside for like six hours,
(12:09):
like and that's too long for me. So like sometimes you literally just
need like the sunlight on your skinand like that vitamin D. I mean
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True Bill. Take control of yoursubscriptions and finances. Now back to
the podcast. But you do youneed that sunlight? It's sometimes what Yeah,
me too. And sometimes I'm insideand I'm like I need I'm like
depressed, I need happiness. I'ma happy person. I want to be
happy. So you're I think weforget that, you know, So it's
good that you're reinforcing that. Outof all the girls, you know,
(14:18):
I know, they all embraced youpretty pretty much. So who do you
feel like you were the closest too? And I'll let you know. I
mean, we're seeing we're seeing youbeing getting close to Lindsey Hubbard, which
I love this sisterhood between you two, this best friendship that's about. I
mean that you guys seem close andI like it, and I love it,
and and I think that it wasreally sweet to see you there for
(14:39):
her in these moments when you guysdidn't know each other that well, but
you kind of came as this likesister nurturing like I got you, I
get you. I'm here to listento you, and I'm also here to
I like how I'm saying. Youdon't fight. I like how you communicate.
You don't take sides. You're veryrational, and that's how everybody should
be. It's not about to sidesfor friendships. For breakups. Everybody's on
(15:01):
this thing. Same with my X. It's like, let's take sides,
you know, because I'm insane.A comedy never, Yeah, it's never.
It's not black and white. Andthat's the problem is if you're just
gonna like sit there and take sides, then you're ignoring all the nuance,
and you're ignoring like all the differentthings that have happened in that you know,
particular situation and just kind of likeputting a blanket statement on it.
(15:22):
And that's not fair because there aretimes when, like say, you're like
team Danielle, right, there aretimes when Danielle was right. There are
also times when Danielle was wrong,and we don't just excuse all of the
like wrong things on either side forthe sake of like saying we're on a
team. Like, Ultimately, ifwe want these girls to resolve their issues
and become friends again, which weand I in particular really do, then
(15:43):
like everyone needs to take accountability forlike what they're fucking up, and then
they also need to like listen tothe other person hearing them out, talk
it through, and then also likefeel validated in their feelings and their actions
when they're doing the right thing.And I, by the way, actually
like that's being a good friend.Yeah, that's actually being a fair good
friend. Yeah, like we're notdoing blind loyalty in this house. Also,
(16:07):
like I had just met them,so I was like, I'm not
blindly loyal to anyone. I justmet you guys. So I do think
like that gave me and Gabby,especially like an opportunity to be mediators because
we had started getting close with bothof them, and now I am like
happy to report that I think theyare on the path to reconciliation. So
that is really amazing to see.But yeah, I mean, listen,
(16:30):
a lot of shit goes down inthese friend groups, and it's our job,
like if we're going to be putin the middle of it, to
make sure that everybody comes out feelingseen and heard, but also taking accountability
for times when they messed up,and they did a really good job of
that. I think at the reunion, I think there was some really clear
communication, and like I think I'ma pretty good communicator. Like I think
(16:52):
the hardest thing for me is talkingabout my own feelings. But when I'm
talking about like other situations and otherpeople's things, I think sometimes you're just
too close to it when it's yourown stuff. Like they weren't communicating very
well this summer, but I thinkit's just because it was so raw.
It was all happening at the sametime. They were like really upset,
and like, when you're just thatclose to it, it's very hard to
separate like the logic and like therational thoughts from like what you're feeling.
(17:17):
So I do think like that allowedme and Gabby to kind of mediate a
little bit and help them kind ofget back on the right track. But
anyway, to answer your original question, sorry, I'm a big side,
No, this is important. Toanswer your original question, I would say
I'm the closest with Gabby. Imean we talk every single day. We
do everything together. I was outwith her till five o'clock this morning at
(17:38):
a heart so like we do everythingtogether. We're inseparable, of course,
Corey, I mean you know that. I feel like that's on a different
level. So I don't even youknow, think of that when I'm talking
about like how close I am topeople in the house, and you know,
I really truly have had very likeclose and growing relationships with almost everyone.
(18:00):
I mean, Paige and Amanda,Like everyone just kind of plays different
roles, right, Like Amanda isalmost like a mom big sister to me.
Page is like a big sister,Like she's so good at giving advice,
and she's like such a girls girl, like so loyal to her girls.
Kyle has also been like very fatherlyto me, like he gives me
advice all the time. He's alsoan entrepreneur, so like I lean on
(18:22):
him for stuff like that. Carlhas been so kind and like he has
he's very like sensitive, so likewe talk about our feelings a lot,
you know, Like I've had areally great experience with these people, and
I feel like I'm close with allof them. But I think, you
know, if we're talking about,like day to day, who I'm talking
to all the time, I wouldsay, I'm talking to Gabby all the
(18:44):
time. I'm obviously talking to Coryall the time, but I'm talking to
Gabby all the time. And thenI would say Lindsay and Danielle have gotten
just the farthest out of their wayto make me feel really close to them
and to feel very like special andlike loved as a friend. And that's
part of why it's been really hardto watch them kind of find that rift
in their relationship, But I'm veryoptimistic that it's on the mend now and
(19:07):
I'm just really looking forward to ata time when we can all be best
friends and like have a crazy summertogether. Well on that note, yeah,
talking about wanting your friends that you'reclose with, I've been in this
revolve, been in this situation whereyou want them to get along. How
was it for you? No,Like, I don't know if you're a
people pleaser like I kind of am, so Like, was it hard for
you though to tell Danielle and lindsaywhen they were wrong and when they needed
(19:30):
to hear one another, Like wereyou ever scared or nervous? Like this
might turn on me? And rightnow I can't afford that because I'm,
you know, the new person,not that And by the way, everyone
listening though, That's what we needto take away from that stigma. What
you've helped us learn is like,it doesn't matter if you're new or not.
It's about human decency first and foremost, and treating everyone with respect and
like getting to know that person andwanting to accept them. But at the
(19:52):
same time, like you said,not holding one thing you tell a friend
against you for the rest of yourtime together, you know what I mean.
Yeah, I'm not great at confrontation. If I'm being honored, like
it makes me uncomfortable. Like Iyou know, I'm happy to speak up
when I'm really feeling hurt and Ineed to like talk things out. I'm
not a fighter. I'm not ayeller like Danielle and Lindsay get they get
(20:14):
volume when they like get hot onsomething or when they get upset about things,
and they're very direct communicators, Whereaslike, sometimes that makes me like
very intimidated and uncomfortable. So therewere definitely times when like I was just
monitoring like the situation and trying notto like upset anyone and like tiptoeing a
little bit. But that said,like what trump's all of it? To
(20:36):
me, the most important thing isthat they find a way back to each
other. So like sometimes I haveto be uncomfortable, like and that's you
know, sucks in the moment,But the reward, the payoff of that,
if it can help them get backto a place where they can be
friends, it's totally worth it,right, Like the intention is pure and
that's all that matters that it's comingfrom you. If they know that,
that's when it's okay. I feel, yeah, just direct and honest.
(20:57):
And I'm not like a big likereceipts. I'm learning through the problem received
a receipts girl, I'm learning thatI have to do that. But like
for me, like what I leavethese experiences with is like a feeling and
like knowledge of like how everyone feltleaving that situation. And like maybe in
the future I'm going to be morereceipts girly, so I can like point
to facts when I'm trying to makemy points. I didn't realize that was
(21:18):
such a big thing, But like, I know how everyone is making each
other feel, and ultimately that's whatthe friendship is based on. The friendship
is not based on text messages,it's not based on you know, timestamps.
It is based on how everybody's makingeach other feel. And so that's
my priority is making sure that wecan kind of get to a place where
we all understand how we're making eachother feel and that we're all being really
intentional in like making sure our friendslike feel loved and supported. Amen.
(21:42):
That is really the most important.That's the goal that's where you get to
and I think that's where the mostmiscommunication. Of course a lot of people's
egos. I mean from your pointof view, because you've been there the
most out of all of us,you know, on and off camera,
What do you think was the root? It's not right. It's never about
the wedding or the engagement or thelittle stuff or that one thing. What
(22:03):
do you think really was the disconnectthat they weren't getting each other. I
think there were two things. There'swhat actually happened, and then there's the
communication about what happened. So whatactually happened I think is they were a
group of three friends, Carl,Lindsay, and Danielle, and the relationships
within a group of friends shifted andit created a dynamic that Danielle that made
(22:26):
her feel excluded, unloved, unattendedto. And that was like what happened.
That was like the action that occurred. Then the other problem was the
way they communicated about it. LikeDanielle to me didn't approach the communication the
right way with Lindsay, and Lindsaywas having a hard time hearing her thereafter
(22:49):
because then she was hurt by theway Danielle was acting, so it kind
of snowballed. And I honestly alwayssay this, like I think the initial
problem it was totally recovered, Likethis would have been very easy fixed to
me if the communication was good fromthe get go. But since the communication
was not good, the fallout endedup being much bigger, I think than
(23:10):
it ever needed to be. Likethis whole fight ended up becoming like so
much more heartbreaking than I think itneeded to be based on like what the
issue at hand actually was. Butyou know, I think people are going
to be happy that, like bythe end of the reunion in my opinion,
Like trust me, when I sayend, I mean end, like
(23:30):
really the last couple of minutes,so stick it out. But I think
by the end of the reunion thecommunication is so much clearer, and that
ultimately is like what creates that pathforward for them is like them just being
able to finally communicate about it,because like I said, I think if
they had started doing that from thebeginning, this would have been over at
a weekend. But I think alsolike, yeah, I also think boundary.
(23:52):
I think also knowing them personally andthen knowing like I get why Danielle
was hurt because it was the threeamigos, and I'm sure she wanted them
to be like, hey, Danielle, come with us, do this?
Do that. The thing that wedon't see too is I know Lindsay mentioned
it with Maya, where I've gonethrough this before so I can relate.
And it's very hard to tell yourbest friends or friends in general that are
(24:12):
girls that used to have a relationshipwith your with your new boyfriend or fiance
about boundaries. And that's something Ifeel Lindsay should have could have been more
clear maybe and then Danielle would haveunderstood, so she wouldn't have had that
many expectations of like, oh,I get it. They're not trying to
ic me out. It's just there'sboundaries. So once you accept that a
little bit more, it's easier.I don't know, I'm just saying it
(24:34):
becomes a lot of this boundary thing. Unfortunately when you become in a relationship,
I mean, yeah, and Ithink, how do you feel about
that? Do you have boundaries?Like? Are you that kind of terrible
at boundaries? I let everyone in. I'm like such a mushy lover,
like I just want everyone like I'mlike I'm putting it all out there,
right. I think if you're onreality TV, you are categorically bad with
(24:55):
boundaries, So like let's start thatas a baseline. But yeah, I
mean less. I think that thepath forward for them is going to be
not rehashing what's happened and not liketalking about like the actions and the hurt
and the communication, but instead it'sgoing to be setting expectations for the future.
Like I think at this point we'veall talked ad nauseum about the problems
(25:17):
and like what's happened in the past. Now we need to be solutions oriented
and set expectations where like what's thenext evolution of this friendship going to look
like? Because I think that's whathappened, is like there were there were
different expectations than what was being received. And so I think in the future,
being able to communicate directly about likewhat those expectations are and where the
(25:37):
boundary is, I think that isgoing to be how they ultimately come up
on the resolution. And I sointerrupt you, but I have a hard
stop into be off my way ifI'm just giving you a headslope, now,
thank you, Okay, We're goingto go now to your relationship with
Corey, which is an amazing,blossoming relationship. I'm so in love with
you two together. I think youguys are perfect together. Talk to us
(25:59):
a little bit about you know you'regoing into the summer house. You're not
looking for a relationship. Did youexpect any of this? No? No,
I mean the way summer always goesis I go in dating like four
or five guys, and I comeout dating four or five guys, sometimes
six or seven if it goes well. So, like, under no circumstances
did I expect to like find aboyfriend this summer, especially given the added
(26:21):
layer of like doing it on TVwith like these specific eleven people. Like,
what are the odds you're going tobring in one additional single man into
this house halfway through the summer andhe's going to be the man of my
dreams? The odds are slimmed none. So, Like, I meet this
guy who was like immediately writing himoff, I'm like, yeah, I'll
make out with him, We'll saywhatever. Now, like eight nine months
later, I like I can't stopthinking about him. I'm like, what
(26:44):
I just I really didn't see itcoming. But it was a very happy
surprise, so we see I know, I don't want to ruin this spoil
I don't want to spoil it becausewe still have a couple more episodes left
plus the reunion. But we dosee him confessing him liking you. Why
was it so important? Because Iknow as a woman it is it's important
for the guy that you like toactually confirm he likes you and you want
to be exclusive. So take usthrough, like what made you wanted like
(27:07):
at that point, or what madehim Why do you think he committed to
you out of like all the girlshe spent winter house in summer house with.
I mean, I just think we'reso compatible and we're so easy and
like it's just an instant chemical energymatch, Like we just we make each
other better, we make each otherlaugh, we can talk about more serious
(27:29):
things. We you know, wehave compatible lifestyles. Like it really just
checks all the boxes. I mean, it's almost like you can't really describe
what it is. It just works. And I think it's been a long
time since I felt like that ina relationship, hence the roster. And
I think for him, like again, like we're looking at this pool of
people in front of us and sometimesit's eleven people big and a lot of
(27:52):
those people like, I'm not datingthe girls in the house, so like
it is, you know, sometimes you're just like hooking up to hook
up. Sometimes you're just having funwhatever it is. Like the odds that
your person is in that group ofpeople is very slim. It's very low
odds. Um, and I thinkwe just got lucky that. You know,
I'm not a big like destiny Fateuniverse situation like person. That's not
(28:17):
really my vibe. But um,we got really lucky. That's amazing.
So you could say you're officially dating. Yes, ladies out there, you
got to stay away to Samantha,you're gonna tell me because for your ass.
Yeah, no, you guys aresuper cute. Give me a tip
(28:40):
to share with our audience when they'redating out there and they want to what's
your tip about like keeping the guyor attracting the guy like a quarry that
you want. You have to andthis is I sound like brokenacker, but
you have to be exactly yourself becauseif you base the relationship on a version
of you that you're creating for him, then you need to live in that
(29:00):
character that facade for the rest ofyour damn life. Like, if he
doesn't love you for who you are, then you are signing up for a
lifetime of misery. So like,I am someone who's never happy unless and
being completely myself, and Corey givesme complete permission and puts all his enthusiasm
behind me being myself. And there'sthe right person for you allows you to
(29:22):
be yourself and makes you a betterversion of that self. So you know,
I vehemently protest when people are likechanging things about themselves to be in
a relationship. Like compromise is verydifferent from what I'm talking about too,
Like, I just want to makethat clear, Like compromise is important changing
your personality and your values and likewhat you want and who you are to
(29:47):
be in a relationship. It neverworks out. So my advice is truly
truly be who you are and fuckingown it, because if that person doesn't
like it, someone else is goingto. And by being with this person
who prefers like fake made a versionof you, you are missing out on
the person who's going to love youfor you. I love that. So
you're an entrepreneur yourself. You actuallycame into the house. You're a very
(30:08):
well known writer in the fashion industryand you have your agency. Fair Agency
talked to us a little bit aboutboth being a career woman, being an
entrepreneur, playing hard, working hard. You know what inspired you to find
the agency. I love talking aboutthis stuff with our guests. Yeah,
I mean, my career has alwaysbeen like the number one thing in my
(30:30):
life outside of my friends and family. I have been very career focused.
I was always the girl who hadinternships and jobs in like high school and
college. Like that was me.And it's because I just found a passion
for like meeting people, building relationships, building communities. And when I was
a journalist, the way that manifestedwas like I started just building this network.
I got to learn about people,I got to interview people, I
(30:51):
got to communicate with people, Igot to like make friends within the industry
outside of the industry. It wasjust such a like relationship forward job.
And I love writing. It's justa passion of mine and something I think
I'm good at and it's a wayfor me to kind of communicate things and
share them with the world. Ilove that. But the way that turned
into the marketing agency is exactly whatI just said. It's all about community
(31:15):
building and relationships for me. Sowhen I left journalism to start this business,
it was all about making marketing humanagain. Like we're not the SEO
people. We're not doing like keywordvalue, Like that's not what we're what
we're doing. We're building relationships withcreators, We're building relationships with customers,
we're doing B to B partnerships,and all of it is focused on connecting
(31:37):
people with brands, products, otherpeople that we think are going to be
a great fit. And it's beensuper rewarding. It's something I'm really proud
of and something that I spend likeevery waking second thinking about. So you
know, it's really important to me. I love it. Where can everybody
follow you in the agency? Theycan follow me on Instagram. I always
(31:59):
say follow me in Stagram because that'swhere I post all the summer house,
like behind the scenes stuff I'm alwaysposting about, like me and Corey like,
so if you want to stay upto date, Instagram is definitely the
place for me. So my personalInstagram is just my name is Samantha Fair.
And then the agency is Fairy Agencyon Instagram, and you know,
our website is there and stuff,so you can check it out. I
love that. Can you give usa little bit of a tease? I
(32:21):
know I can't say much, butwhat we can look forward to the rest
of the season and for the reunion. I think you're just gonna see me
and Corey being a great fit andhaving some fun and getting to spend some
more time together. That was thelast couple of weeks. We're very special
for us because I think we reallysettled into kind of each other and found
ourselves in the relationship and started gettingexcited about what was to come after the
(32:42):
summer. You know, you'll seeLindsay and Carl experienced some joy, You'll
see them experience some pain. You'llsee Lindsay and Danyell really get to like
the hottest part of the of thebeef. You'll see Kyle making and ask
out of himself at some more parties, something that we all love to see.
(33:04):
That's my dad. You know,You'll see you'll definitely get at least
another party too, which is veryimportant to us. I know. And
in the end, I think whatreally kind of wraps it all up and
ties anice a little bow on itis going to be the reunion. I
think that will clear a lot ofthings up for people. It will be
you know, in the end,I think it creates the path forward for
(33:27):
reconciliation, and that's what we allwant is to be able to theoretically all
be in a house together next summer, having a good time and being friends.
So hopefully that's where this leaves us. Is there someone that you specifically
on your journey that you want totalk to share that you wanted to clear
up some things at the reunion.We're going to have to stay tuned for
that. But that we're missing ornot really. I mean, I was
(33:51):
just excited to kind of give theworld an update on me and Corey at
that. Yeah, we've been datingfor months by the time the reunion films,
Like we've traveled together, We've onholidays together, Like we've he's met
my parents, I've met his family, so you know, we we have
gotten a lot more serious and um, you know, slapped a label on
that thing, and you know,it was just fun to kind of be
(34:13):
able to give everybody the update onwhere we're at right now and how we're
just loving life. I love that. I love how supportive he is,
he that he loves that you areyourself and both of you. I think
this is gonna be a great couple. I can't wait till your wedding because
it's happening. I just said,I know it's happening. I'll crash it.
I'm gonna be like a girl.Okay, remember what he said.
(34:37):
Um no, we are so excitedto see this. I gotta tell you
when I watch you and Corey,you're my life, Like I forget anything
that happened in my past relationships andI'm like honored. There's a honored No
really, I mean it was themost unexpected thing to come out of this
summer. In my opinions, itisn't that amazing that when you have like
the least expectations then things happen.And I also loved how you like made
(35:00):
and court you in a way likeyou were like yeah you were Like last
two episodes, you're like not chasingLike no, Like I want you to
tell me in your own words whatyou want to do this relationship after the
summer, because at the end ofthe day, like it matters just as
much what he wants as what Iwant. And why does the girl always
have to be the one pushing therelationship. Bar I was going to say
that, now, how you feelabout me, maybe that's something we could
(35:22):
all try, right, Maybe weshould turn it around like you did with
a guy, because we're right,we're always the ones fighting and pushing and
labeling, right, and then youkind of like we're all scared of getting
hurt in the end. That's allit is. It's not that they don't
have the feelings, it's that sometimesthey're just afraid to talk about them because
it's it's scary. So I thinksometimes push gums to shove and it ends
(35:44):
up working out for the best ifit's meant to be. And how cool
is it that he is best friendswith Craig, which is Paige's boyfriend.
So do you guys do a lotof double dates as well? You know,
we're all traveling so much that wehaven't had a lot of time for
double dates lately, but we dolove spending time with them. We always
have fun when we're together. Thevibes are very high. So yeah,
we love Pagron Craig and we loveto like they're a very good example for
(36:06):
us to kind of understand how tonavigate the whole long distance thing, so
we're very grateful for our friendships withthem. What can we expect from your
journey? So what can we lookforward with you, like whether it's going
on season two in life, like, what would you like to share with
us that to clarify that you mighthave not shared on the season. I
mean, I'm an open book.There's nothing I'm keeping from you guys,
(36:28):
so you know it all. Idon't know yet about this coming summer.
If I get the call, I'llbe there. I had so much fun,
made some great memories, so Iwould never turn it down if it
came my way. I love that. And any advice for anybody doing reality
TV what you would share with thembe in therapy. I have a damned
therapist because this stuff is so hardand there's a very very small subset of
(36:52):
people who experience it right, Likemy group of friends is twelve of us
thirteen sometimes if Craig is in theroom, and those are the only people
who really understand what you're going through. But having someone like on the outside
of it, who's unbiased, whois whose entire job is to like help
you pick it apart and make senseof it, is so valuable and you
(37:14):
know it's twenty twenty three. Ifthere's still stigma around therapy, then you're
the problem, not the therapy.So that honestly, like just having the
people to talk to and having theright support system in place is the best
way to make sure that you arelike getting positivity out of the experience,
not getting caught up in your heador in all the extra bullshit, and
(37:35):
it allows you the space to likemake your friendships and live your life to
the full list in a way that'sreally healthy. I love it, And
Onchan on the City, we askevery guest before we wrap up, what's
your favorite place to recommend for usto check out in the city that you
love. Restaurant? Oh, mygoodness, for a restaurant right now,
I'm gonna say, go to Alba. It's a great Italian restaurant. It's
(38:00):
pretty new and the food is justspectacular. The vibes are immaculate. It's
really beautiful and like one of mynew favorite spots in the city. I
love it. Well. Samantha Fair, you are amazing. We love you.
We can't wait to follow you onyour journey. Thank you for being
on Shanel in the City. Thankyou so much. For having me.
This is so fun. Hey youguys, it's Sam from Summerhouse and today
(38:20):
you are listening to me with mygirls. Chanel A Mari on the Chanelle
in the City podcast
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