April 21, 2025 • 30 mins
Through an intimate lens, KB reveals a significant journey back to Iowa, where she celebrated the intersection of familial love and spiritual reflection during Easter. KB shares a heartfelt narrative about surprising her son Caleb for his birthday while simultaneously engaging with the profound implications of the Easter holiday. This dual celebration sums up the core message of the episode: the importance of recognizing the deeper significance behind our traditions and the enduring nature of faith. The speaker articulates how Easter represents not just a holiday but the very foundation of Christian belief—the resurrection of Christ and the promise of salvation, urging listeners to appreciate the gravity of these celebrations.
This episode captures a call to embrace one's faith and navigate the complexities of life with love, understanding, and resilience. Activate continues to resonate deeply with its audience by offering thoughtful insights into the human experience, urging all to activate their lives through faith and connection.
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Episode Transcript
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(00:01):
Island Boy.
Hello friends.
Welcome to Activate, a podcastconsisting of purposeful conversations
aimed at encouraging listenersto embrace both the beauty and chaos
of life.
I'm KB and I can't wait toshare valuable insights on health,
(00:23):
fitness, nutrition, aging,faith, family and everything in between
to help you level up andactivate your life.
I'm a former network marketinghater turned top leader in my industry.
I'm a certified life andnutrition coach, helping women to
break the same chains thatonce kept me stuck.
I'm so happy you're here.
Let's do this.
(00:46):
Hello friends.
Happy Monday.
Happy day after Easter.
Happy resurrection.
He is risen.
I hope you really understandand fully grasp the gravity of what
we celebrated yesterday.
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The most important day in, inthe life of a Christian.
It is the reason, it is thereason for everything.
It is our salvation and justsuch a special day and one that I
feel like unfortunately gets.
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I mean, it's just like everyother Christian holiday.
It's kind of become acelebration without meaning behind
it for, for a lot of people.
And I think it's importantthat we recognize the reason we're
celebrating and that is thecrucifixion, but ultimately the resurrection
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of, of Jesus to save us fromour sins.
I am going to talk to youtoday about.
Well, first I want to talkabout Iowa.
So I told you last week that Iwas going to surprise my mom and
my boys.
It was Caleb's 22nd birthdayand, and it just happened to fall
(02:11):
on the same weekend that mymom was playing Mary in crown of
thorns at her church.
The, the story of, of, ofEaster, of the crucifixion and resurrection
of Christ.
And it was, I, I, I thought tomyself, if this play is on the same
weekend as Caleb's birthday,what a fun thing to go and surprise
(02:34):
my mom and my kids.
And it was.
And so I booked the, theflight and made the plans to go.
I ended up telling my dad andmy sister and my daughter in law
so that they could kind ofmake sure that no one was making
plans outside of what wouldwork with me being there.
(02:55):
But one evening after Irecorded last week, I got a text
from Stellan and he said, areyou coming home for Caleb's birthday?
And I just sent like crying emojis.
And he said, does that mean no?
And I couldn't bring myself tolie even for the surprise.
So I was like, bud, why wouldyou ask me that?
(03:18):
Yes, I am, but it was asurprise for you too.
And his response was, youcould have just said no.
I didn't know I was like, come on.
So then we chatted, and I toldhim I was going to surprise my mom,
surprise Caleb.
And that yes, I would be homejust for the weekend, but that I
was, you know, just so lookingforward to seeing him.
And I told him how I'dprobably imagined a hundred times
(03:42):
in my head what it.
What his face would look likewhen he saw me and the hug that I
was going to give him.
And basically, he ruined it all.
But I.
Of course, I didn't say that.
A couple days later, Stellancalled me.
I picked up the phone and hesaid, yeah, we got a problem.
And I said, does Caleb know?
(04:04):
And he said, no, but Graham does.
So he had accidentally spilledthe beans to my mom.
And so Caleb was just the lastone not to know.
And thankfully, he was still surprised.
And I was actually so sad thatmy mom found out.
I was so looking forward tothe surprise of.
Of being at her play when shehad no idea I was in Iowa.
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But I.
I quickly got over it andrealized God had a different plan.
There was a reason he wantedmy mom to know, and there was a reason
he wanted Stellan to know.
But I felt a little bummed at first.
So I flew into Iowa on Friday morning.
My sweet friend Nikki took theday off of work to come and pick
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me up, and we spent some timetogether that day.
She drove me all the way backhome, and then we went to the gym
together.
Did we go for.
Yes, we went for a walk that day.
We got some steps in.
We had lunch together.
We visited with my grandma.
And that was just a reallyspecial day.
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And I'm so grateful for afriend that would take a day off
of work just to come and getme and help me to.
To make this surprise come true.
So we did that.
And then I actually called myex husband, Caleb, works for his
dad.
And I said, when is Calebgetting home from work?
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And he said, 15 minutes.
So I had just like an hourbefore I had to get to the play.
But I wanted to see Caleb onFriday because my fear was if I saved
the surprise for Saturday, hewould, like, stay up all night Friday
night playing video games andthen sleep all of Saturday.
And I would miss out on allthat time with him.
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So it worked out so perfectly.
I hopped in my grandma's carand I drove to his work, and I happened
to just, like, pull in.
Just like, I was probably aquarter mile behind the trucks all
pulling in from their job, andCaleb didn't notice me.
He hopped out of the truck andwas Kind of like beelining it for
another building.
He had his head down, justwalking and I like sliding slowly
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pulled up, rolled down thewindow and said, hey bud, happy birthday.
And his face, it was worthevery, it was worth everything.
Like he just lit up and he was like.
Mom gave me a huge hug.
Now mind you, I've not seen mychildren since I told them goodbye
before my surgery.
And so it was just.
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I don't know how to explain it.
It was, it was everything Icould have hoped it would be.
He was so happy.
He genuinely hugged me just sotightly and was so joyful that I
was there and so grateful thatI came and we made a plan for the
following day and I told him Iwas going to Graham's play and you
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know, just that I love him somuch and I couldn't miss the day
with him and he's so specialto me and oh my gosh, it was just,
he must have hugged me fivetimes in those 15 minutes that I
spent with him there and youknow, just sent the sweetest text
later how grateful he was thatI was home.
And it just, it just absolutely.
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My heart was so overflowingand full of joy, I cannot even tell
you.
And then I went back to myparents house and my mom got home
from work and she pretended tobe surprised.
She knew I was coming and wehad talked about it, but she got
out of the car and she's like,oh my gosh, I'm so excited.
So that was sweet.
(07:40):
And I got ready and went toher play, which was just amazing.
This beautiful depiction of,you know, how God sent Jesus to save
us and the, the cruelty of itall and what he went through, you
know, leading up to hiscrucifixion and death on the cross
and, and, and then I had the,the beauty of, you know, being risen
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and coming back and, andsaving us and this gift of salvation
and eternal life that we allget because of him.
And it was so good, so moving,so beautiful, such a great, a great
play and my mom did a greatjob and it was so good to be there.
And so I did that Friday nightand then Saturday, I trying to think,
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when did I finally get to see Stella?
And I got to see Stella on Saturday.
Caleb came over for coffee inthe morning and we all went and worked
out together and that was sofun and sweet.
I got to go for a walk withBritney and just get to spend time
with her and talk with her.
It was just the most perfect weekend.
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I will say Sunday was a littlebit Sad knowing that I was leaving
and I went to see Caleb'shouse for the first time.
And while it makes me so happyand proud, it also made me sad.
His house felt a littlelonely, little cold.
I don't.
I just, like.
I just felt sad for him.
I wanted to stay there withhim forever, even though I know that's
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not what's best for him.
I wanted to make his house ahome, and I wanted to cook all of
his meals and make all of hisprotein shakes and just get to say
good morning and good night tohim forever.
That's.
That's just who I am.
But we went.
He and I went together onSunday and did a workout.
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We had a birthday party forCaleb on Sunday.
That just made my heart so happy.
I have just the best family.
I'm so grateful when I tellyou just on the plane home how full
of gratitude I was for the children.
God bless me with the parentsGod blessed me with for that.
My grandma, at 88 years old,almost is still with us and just
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as sharp and funny as ever.
And the friends, the.
The.
The friends that I am soblessed to have and that I am able
to maintain over such adistance and so much time apart,
and how grateful I am to justbe from Iowa and to have been born
and raised there with just thevalues and morals of.
(10:22):
Of Midwestern upbringing.
And I just was so full of gratitude.
It.
The weekend couldn't have been.
I couldn't have imagined it better.
And so, you know, all the timeI got to spend with my kids, the
pictures I got.
I'm always just all about thepicture because once I leave, it's
all I've got.
And as much as they hate it, they.
They oblige.
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They give me what they know I need.
And I couldn't be more blessedwith Britney, Stellan's wife.
She is so sweet.
You know, between her andCaleb, I got the most sweet and genuine
text messages just of howgrateful they are that.
That I got to come and spendthe time and how thankful they are
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for me.
My gosh, I am so thankful for them.
They just have no idea.
So.
Couldn't have been better.
I'm so glad I went.
I felt so full of gratitudefor a direct flight from D.C.
to Cedar Rapids.
I.
I'm telling you, I.
On the way home, I think itwas an hour and 34 minutes from.
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From wheels up to wheels down.
I felt completely safe.
There was very little turbulence.
I hadn't flown out of Reagan,so I was a little nervous flying
out of Reagan, because of allthe news.
But airplane travel is safe.
It is the safest way to travel.
I felt perfectly safe.
I was like, man.
I ate lunch at the airport inIowa and I had landed after losing
(11:50):
an hour in the air by 2:35back here in Virginia.
And it's just like, okay, thismakes me feel so much less far away
from the people I love,knowing that I can get to them literally
in an hour and a half.
So praise God for all of it.
I had a lot to just write downand recap in my gratitude journal
(12:13):
on Tuesday morning.
Just the perfect weekend.
I.
I couldn't have imagined it better.
So, so grateful for that.
I had a.
Really speaking of Iowa, Ihave a very sweet friend who I met
in college in Iowa, and wehave stayed close.
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Despite her now living outwest and me living out east, we've
managed to just stay in contact.
If you don't use Marco Polo, Iimplore you to use Marco Polo.
It is a.
A video messaging app, andit's my favorite thing.
I keep in touch with a lot ofmy favorite people via Marco Polo.
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We just send a video and thenwhenever the person, you know, the
other person has time, theycan listen to the video and respond
via their own video.
And it's such a nice way to beable to see the person, but you're
still just able to get to themwhen you, you know, different than
like a phone call when theyneed your attention immediately.
But I am very grateful forMarco Polo and the way it's helped
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me to stay in communication,really constant communication with
so many people that I don'tget to see on a daily basis.
So she and I had aconversation last week, kind of like
a deep and emotionalconversation, you know, about our
faith and about her feelingsregarding what God says about homosexuality
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and her just her not beingable to reconcile sort of a loving
God with homosexuality being asin when it's just about love and
God is love and why would henot want people to live out, you
know, what makes them happyand loved?
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And it was a really hardconversation because I had to, you
know, share with her that Isee it differently and that I do
see it as sin.
And it's because God says thatit is.
And it's in the Bible.
It's in both the Old and theNew Testaments.
And I believe that the Bibleis the ultimate truth.
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And I was trying to talk alittle bit about how, like, sexual
activity with the same sex isconsidered sin, but it's not because
we hate or exclude A personthat desires that, but because it
falls outside of what God,what his original design was for
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sexuality and marriage.
Okay, so the Bibleconsistently presents sexual intimacy
as something created for oneman and one woman within the covenant
of marriage.
It's.
It's referenced in both theNew and Old Testaments.
Same sex sexual behavior iscontrary to God's design.
(15:12):
And it's not that the Biblesingles out gay people, but it teaches
that all people are born witha sinful nature.
And we each have desires,sexual or otherwise, that may not
align with God's will.
We all have them.
The Christian message isn'tabout condemning one specific group,
but about God offering graceand transformation to everyone through
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what Jesus did for us on the cross.
I read this book one timecalled Gay Girl Good God by Jackie
Hill Perry.
And it's like, it's about aChristian woman who was gay and that
it wasn't about becomingstraight, but about surrendering
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every part of life to God'sdesign, right?
And how that leads to deep joyand freedom in your life.
So it's such a tough one.
It really, really is adifficult conversation.
(16:14):
But it leads me more into somethings that I've been learning as
I read a couple of books.
I've been reading aboutspiritual warfare and about our God
given purpose in our life.
So I just wanted to share thatwith you.
And again, I know this podcastis different than it used to be,
(16:38):
but I cannot help but shareabout God and what the gift of his
son's sacrifice has done forme in my own life and for all of
you.
And I just want.
I just want us all to be inheaven together one day.
And I feel so called to sharethis message.
And I don't see it changing.
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For all of you who loved itbefore, I don't see it changing.
I'm not going to apologize.
We all grow, right?
We all change.
And I.
Your girl has just has changed.
And so much about the things Iused to share about, I see are sinful
and are not helpful.
(17:21):
And maybe they're relatablebecause sin is relatable, right?
We can all relate to sin.
But you're going to relatetoday to what I have to share with
you about.
About what the devil is doingand about temptation because we all
are tempted.
So again, this just reminds meof this conversation I had with my
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friend because it made herquestion God, it made her doubt him,
and it made her wrestle withwhat she.
She knows of God because toher, God is love.
And why can't people just loveeach Other.
So the thing about God is hecan handle all of your questions,
he can handle your doubts, hecan handle your wrestling.
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But be aware that the enemyuses this as a tactic.
So his goal is to make youwalk away from your faith, right?
And the easiest way to do thatis to make you question and doubt
goodness of God.
So people, some of thesequestions that people often ask are,
is God real?
Is God good?
Is God powerful?
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Is God for me?
And can I trust God's people,which is the church?
The enemy will cause us todoubt one or all of these truths.
Sometimes faith gets tough.
Just like what I just sharedwith you.
Faith gets tough in this area.
This friend of mine, she has aniece who is gay.
And her inclination, hernatural inclination, is just to love
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her and support her inwhatever it is that makes her happy,
right?
And I think as Christians,sometimes we get in trouble because
we think we're supposed to be happy.
So again, the enemy's gonnacause us to doubt one or all of those
questions.
And sometimes faith gets toughand causes us to wrestle, question
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and doubt.
Some will try to take fromChristianity what serves them right.
Like, they'll take salvation,they'll take heaven, they'll take
crying out to God for help indifficult times.
But then they want to leavethe rest.
They want to leave whatdoesn't serve them.
They want to leave the hard stuff.
They don't want to have to dieto themselves or their selfish desires.
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They want to live forthemselves and not live for Christ.
They don't want to admit theirsins and repent of them.
If you find yourselfquestioning whether God is good because
of a pain or loss that youhave suffered, know that God never
desired for his children to suffer.
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Right?
So again, what.
What are these tough things?
It can be so many things, butlike the loss of a child, that is
one thing.
I have always thought I couldnever survive that I believe.
I don't even want to say Ibelieve that I could because I don't
want to.
I don't ever want toexperience that level of pain.
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But based on what I have seenGod get me through, I trust that
he would get me through that.
But my goodness, it is mybiggest fear in life.
But he has never desired forus to suffer in that way.
We.
I talked about this last week,but in Genesis 3, because of the
Fall, the world that we livein is not the.
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The world that God everintended us to live in.
His first desire was for us todwell with him in peace, that our
hearts would be filled with joy.
And we would be surrounded by perfection.
And that's what we can lookforward to once we get to heaven.
But here, the little G God ofthis world, which is the enemy, has
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come to steal, kill and destroy.
Is it crazy that the enemySatan is the God of this world?
That is so sad.
But he uses every bit ofsuffering to drive a wedge between
us and God.
He delights in our suffering.
He loves when we suffer, andeven more so when we blame God for
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the suffering.
It's all part of his ultimateplan to separate us eternally.
That's his whole goal.
Part of the enemy's tactic tocause suffering is through temptation.
He wants to use temptation todestroy you, but God wants to use
it to develop you.
Every temptation is anopportunity to choose rightly and
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do what is good.
Have you heard of the fruit ofthe Spirit?
I've talked about it on here.
But the fruit of the spirit islove, joy, peace, patience, kindness,
goodness, faithfulness,gentleness and self love control.
To have the fruit of theSpirit is to be like Jesus.
But what I know about fruit isthat it ripens slowly.
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Similarly, God develops thefruit in your life by allowing you
to experience circumstances inwhich you are tempted to express
the exact opposite quality.
What I know about fruit isthat it ripens slowly.
Similarly, God develops thefruit in your life by allowing you
to experience circumstances inwhich you are tempted to express
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the exact opposite quality.
The development of character.
The development of the fruitalways involves a choice.
And temptation provides that opportunity.
We learn to love by dealingwith those who seem unlovable.
We learn real joy in the midstof sorrow.
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We develop peace in times ofconfusion and chaos.
When we choose to trust or God.
We develop patience incircumstances where we are forced
to wait.
God uses the oppositesituation of each fruit to allow
us a choice.
You can't claim to be good ifyou've never been tempted to be bad.
Our integrity is built bydefeating temptation.
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So every time you defeattemptation, you become more like
Jesus.
You develop the fruit of the spirit.
Temptation follows a four stepprocess that begins with a thought.
And this thought is suggestedby the enemy.
God does not tempt you.
So it's.
It's begins with a thoughtthat you give into an evil desire.
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Temptation begins within us.
It always starts in the mind.
In fact, Jesus said fromwithin a person.
I'm sorry for from within, outof a person's heart come evil thoughts,
sexual immorality, theft,murder, adultery, greed, wickedness,
deceit, eagerness for lustfulpleasure, envy, slander, pride and
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foolishness.
All These vile things comefrom within.
And James tells us that thereis a whole army of evil desires within
you.
The next step is doubt.
Satan wants you to questionwhether sin is really wrong.
So that's back to the homosexuality.
Like my friend was using allof these examples like this has been
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like, since the beginning oftime, people have been involved in
homosexuality and it's justtrying to.
Trying to doubt the truth ofGod, right?
We can't believe.
We can't believe in Jesus andbe saved when we don't actually believe
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that what he says is the truth.
So the third is deception.
So once he gets youquestioning, Satan offers a lie to
replace what God has said is truth.
Step four is disobedience.
So when you have this lie thatyou've replaced with God's truth,
then you act on the thoughtyou've been toying with in your mind.
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You give in to the temptation,and that's when it becomes sin.
It was never sin.
Temptation is not sinful.
It's just the act of givinginto the sin.
Christians will never grow outof temptation.
Temptation is part of being human.
In this fallen world, it isnot sinful or shameful to be tempted.
Even Jesus was tempted, but henever sinned.
(25:26):
Temptation only becomes sinfulwhen you give into it.
The closer you grow to God,the more you will be tempted.
Tempted.
The enemy has a target.
There is a target on your backonce you've accepted Jesus into your
life.
The enemy, you're a threat tothe enemy once you've done that.
So it's important to recognizeyour pattern of temptation and be
(25:47):
prepared for it.
So there are situations andcircumstances that will cause you
to stumble almost immediately.
These situations are unique toyour own weaknesses.
And Satan knows exactly whattrips you up, so he is constantly
at work trying to get you intothose circumstances.
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So it's important to askyourself, when am I most tempted?
Where am I most tempted?
Who am I with when I'm most tempted?
We all know there are peoplewho you can spend time with that
you end up making decisionsyou wouldn't have made otherwise.
How do I feel when I'm most tempted?
Am I lonely?
Am I sad?
Am I hurt?
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Am I angry?
All of these negative feelingscan lead us to giving into temptation.
So identify your pattern andthen avoid at all costs those situations
as much as humanly possible.
Ask God to help you overcome temptation.
Jesus is sympathetic to our struggles.
He understands our weaknesses,for he faced all the same temptations
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we do.
Yet he did not sin.
The Bible says he faced allthe same Temptations we do.
And yet he did not sin.
So come to the Lord boldly andask him for the power to resist temptation
and then expect him to provide it.
1 Corinthians 10:13 tells us,no temptation has overtaken you except
what is common to mankind.
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And God is faithful.
He will not let you be temptedbeyond what you can bear.
But when you are tempted, hewill also provide a way out so that
you can endure it.
The devil is sneaky.
And he knows you.
He knows you so well.
He knows how easily you can be tempted.
And he knows exactly what touse to get you to act on those temptations.
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I know there are parts of theBible that are so, so difficult to
understand.
And we reason in our own mindwhy we can make things okay, right?
We can.
We can do it becauseculturally things have become okay.
Culturally and in moderntimes, we have made sin.
(28:00):
It's just become so.
What's the word I want?
It's become so normalized thatwe think it's actually okay.
And it's not.
Just like homosexuality is a sin.
Sex before marriage is a sin.
And how normal normal have wemade that?
It is not easy to stay free of sin.
It is not easy to not be tempted.
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It is not.
In fact, it's impossible notto be tempted.
But God will give us a way out.
There are a lot of questionsthat we're going to need to ask God
when we get to heaven.
We're not going to get thoseanswers this side of heaven.
But the simple truth about sexoutside of marriage and homosexuality
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is that is just simply outsidethe design that God had for us.
Sex is something that is to bebetween one man and one woman inside
of the covenant of marriage.
And anything outside of thatis a sin.
Thankfully, God knows we willsin and he gives us a way out.
He gave us Jesus.
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It is what we celebrated yesterday.
His son, the perfect Lamb ofGod, the sinless Lamb of God, died
to save us from our sinsbecause he knew we could not live
up to his standards.
So pray on it.
Ask God to remove the temptation.
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Ask God to help you throughthe temptation.
Ask God to help you tounderstand the temptation.
Start to learn to recognizeyour pattern so that you can keep
yourself out, out of placeswhere you're tempted.
I hope that some of this was valuable.
I say it every week.
I hope that that resonatedwith somebody.
Even if it's just one of you.
I hope that you can.
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I don't know, maybe it madeyou recognize a sin in your life
that you can ask for,forgiveness for and repent of because
that is what God wants for you.
I hope you have the bestMonday I'm grateful for.
That's a wrap on anotherepisode of Activate Stay up to Date
by followingristonleighballard on Instagram.
(30:06):
And if this episode made youlaugh, offered value, or simply entertained
you, please like share andgive a five star review on itunes.
Thanks for being here.
Love y'all.
Later.
Island Boy.
Hello friends.
Welcome to Activate, a podcastconsisting of purposeful conversations
aimed at encouraging listenersto embrace both the beauty and chaos
of life.
I'm KB and I can't wait toshare valuable insights on health,
(00:23):
fitness, nutrition, aging,faith, family and everything in between
to help you level up andactivate your life.
I'm a former network marketinghater turned top leader in my industry.
I'm a certified life andnutrition coach, helping women to
break the same chains thatonce kept me stuck.
I'm so happy you're here.
Let's do this.
(00:46):
Hello friends.
Happy Monday.
Happy day after Easter.
Happy resurrection.
He is risen.
I hope you really understandand fully grasp the gravity of what
we celebrated yesterday.
(01:07):
The most important day in, inthe life of a Christian.
It is the reason, it is thereason for everything.
It is our salvation and justsuch a special day and one that I
feel like unfortunately gets.
(01:29):
I mean, it's just like everyother Christian holiday.
It's kind of become acelebration without meaning behind
it for, for a lot of people.
And I think it's importantthat we recognize the reason we're
celebrating and that is thecrucifixion, but ultimately the resurrection
(01:51):
of, of Jesus to save us fromour sins.
I am going to talk to youtoday about.
Well, first I want to talkabout Iowa.
So I told you last week that Iwas going to surprise my mom and
my boys.
It was Caleb's 22nd birthdayand, and it just happened to fall
(02:11):
on the same weekend that mymom was playing Mary in crown of
thorns at her church.
The, the story of, of, ofEaster, of the crucifixion and resurrection
of Christ.
And it was, I, I, I thought tomyself, if this play is on the same
weekend as Caleb's birthday,what a fun thing to go and surprise
(02:34):
my mom and my kids.
And it was.
And so I booked the, theflight and made the plans to go.
I ended up telling my dad andmy sister and my daughter in law
so that they could kind ofmake sure that no one was making
plans outside of what wouldwork with me being there.
(02:55):
But one evening after Irecorded last week, I got a text
from Stellan and he said, areyou coming home for Caleb's birthday?
And I just sent like crying emojis.
And he said, does that mean no?
And I couldn't bring myself tolie even for the surprise.
So I was like, bud, why wouldyou ask me that?
(03:18):
Yes, I am, but it was asurprise for you too.
And his response was, youcould have just said no.
I didn't know I was like, come on.
So then we chatted, and I toldhim I was going to surprise my mom,
surprise Caleb.
And that yes, I would be homejust for the weekend, but that I
was, you know, just so lookingforward to seeing him.
And I told him how I'dprobably imagined a hundred times
(03:42):
in my head what it.
What his face would look likewhen he saw me and the hug that I
was going to give him.
And basically, he ruined it all.
But I.
Of course, I didn't say that.
A couple days later, Stellancalled me.
I picked up the phone and hesaid, yeah, we got a problem.
And I said, does Caleb know?
(04:04):
And he said, no, but Graham does.
So he had accidentally spilledthe beans to my mom.
And so Caleb was just the lastone not to know.
And thankfully, he was still surprised.
And I was actually so sad thatmy mom found out.
I was so looking forward tothe surprise of.
Of being at her play when shehad no idea I was in Iowa.
(04:28):
But I.
I quickly got over it andrealized God had a different plan.
There was a reason he wantedmy mom to know, and there was a reason
he wanted Stellan to know.
But I felt a little bummed at first.
So I flew into Iowa on Friday morning.
My sweet friend Nikki took theday off of work to come and pick
(04:48):
me up, and we spent some timetogether that day.
She drove me all the way backhome, and then we went to the gym
together.
Did we go for.
Yes, we went for a walk that day.
We got some steps in.
We had lunch together.
We visited with my grandma.
And that was just a reallyspecial day.
(05:08):
And I'm so grateful for afriend that would take a day off
of work just to come and getme and help me to.
To make this surprise come true.
So we did that.
And then I actually called myex husband, Caleb, works for his
dad.
And I said, when is Calebgetting home from work?
(05:29):
And he said, 15 minutes.
So I had just like an hourbefore I had to get to the play.
But I wanted to see Caleb onFriday because my fear was if I saved
the surprise for Saturday, hewould, like, stay up all night Friday
night playing video games andthen sleep all of Saturday.
And I would miss out on allthat time with him.
(05:51):
So it worked out so perfectly.
I hopped in my grandma's carand I drove to his work, and I happened
to just, like, pull in.
Just like, I was probably aquarter mile behind the trucks all
pulling in from their job, andCaleb didn't notice me.
He hopped out of the truck andwas Kind of like beelining it for
another building.
He had his head down, justwalking and I like sliding slowly
(06:13):
pulled up, rolled down thewindow and said, hey bud, happy birthday.
And his face, it was worthevery, it was worth everything.
Like he just lit up and he was like.
Mom gave me a huge hug.
Now mind you, I've not seen mychildren since I told them goodbye
before my surgery.
And so it was just.
(06:35):
I don't know how to explain it.
It was, it was everything Icould have hoped it would be.
He was so happy.
He genuinely hugged me just sotightly and was so joyful that I
was there and so grateful thatI came and we made a plan for the
following day and I told him Iwas going to Graham's play and you
(06:57):
know, just that I love him somuch and I couldn't miss the day
with him and he's so specialto me and oh my gosh, it was just,
he must have hugged me fivetimes in those 15 minutes that I
spent with him there and youknow, just sent the sweetest text
later how grateful he was thatI was home.
And it just, it just absolutely.
(07:20):
My heart was so overflowingand full of joy, I cannot even tell
you.
And then I went back to myparents house and my mom got home
from work and she pretended tobe surprised.
She knew I was coming and wehad talked about it, but she got
out of the car and she's like,oh my gosh, I'm so excited.
So that was sweet.
(07:40):
And I got ready and went toher play, which was just amazing.
This beautiful depiction of,you know, how God sent Jesus to save
us and the, the cruelty of itall and what he went through, you
know, leading up to hiscrucifixion and death on the cross
and, and, and then I had the,the beauty of, you know, being risen
(08:05):
and coming back and, andsaving us and this gift of salvation
and eternal life that we allget because of him.
And it was so good, so moving,so beautiful, such a great, a great
play and my mom did a greatjob and it was so good to be there.
And so I did that Friday nightand then Saturday, I trying to think,
(08:30):
when did I finally get to see Stella?
And I got to see Stella on Saturday.
Caleb came over for coffee inthe morning and we all went and worked
out together and that was sofun and sweet.
I got to go for a walk withBritney and just get to spend time
with her and talk with her.
It was just the most perfect weekend.
(08:52):
I will say Sunday was a littlebit Sad knowing that I was leaving
and I went to see Caleb'shouse for the first time.
And while it makes me so happyand proud, it also made me sad.
His house felt a littlelonely, little cold.
I don't.
I just, like.
I just felt sad for him.
I wanted to stay there withhim forever, even though I know that's
(09:13):
not what's best for him.
I wanted to make his house ahome, and I wanted to cook all of
his meals and make all of hisprotein shakes and just get to say
good morning and good night tohim forever.
That's.
That's just who I am.
But we went.
He and I went together onSunday and did a workout.
(09:33):
We had a birthday party forCaleb on Sunday.
That just made my heart so happy.
I have just the best family.
I'm so grateful when I tellyou just on the plane home how full
of gratitude I was for the children.
God bless me with the parentsGod blessed me with for that.
My grandma, at 88 years old,almost is still with us and just
(09:58):
as sharp and funny as ever.
And the friends, the.
The.
The friends that I am soblessed to have and that I am able
to maintain over such adistance and so much time apart,
and how grateful I am to justbe from Iowa and to have been born
and raised there with just thevalues and morals of.
(10:22):
Of Midwestern upbringing.
And I just was so full of gratitude.
It.
The weekend couldn't have been.
I couldn't have imagined it better.
And so, you know, all the timeI got to spend with my kids, the
pictures I got.
I'm always just all about thepicture because once I leave, it's
all I've got.
And as much as they hate it, they.
They oblige.
(10:43):
They give me what they know I need.
And I couldn't be more blessedwith Britney, Stellan's wife.
She is so sweet.
You know, between her andCaleb, I got the most sweet and genuine
text messages just of howgrateful they are that.
That I got to come and spendthe time and how thankful they are
(11:05):
for me.
My gosh, I am so thankful for them.
They just have no idea.
So.
Couldn't have been better.
I'm so glad I went.
I felt so full of gratitudefor a direct flight from D.C.
to Cedar Rapids.
I.
I'm telling you, I.
On the way home, I think itwas an hour and 34 minutes from.
(11:27):
From wheels up to wheels down.
I felt completely safe.
There was very little turbulence.
I hadn't flown out of Reagan,so I was a little nervous flying
out of Reagan, because of allthe news.
But airplane travel is safe.
It is the safest way to travel.
I felt perfectly safe.
I was like, man.
I ate lunch at the airport inIowa and I had landed after losing
(11:50):
an hour in the air by 2:35back here in Virginia.
And it's just like, okay, thismakes me feel so much less far away
from the people I love,knowing that I can get to them literally
in an hour and a half.
So praise God for all of it.
I had a lot to just write downand recap in my gratitude journal
(12:13):
on Tuesday morning.
Just the perfect weekend.
I.
I couldn't have imagined it better.
So, so grateful for that.
I had a.
Really speaking of Iowa, Ihave a very sweet friend who I met
in college in Iowa, and wehave stayed close.
(12:34):
Despite her now living outwest and me living out east, we've
managed to just stay in contact.
If you don't use Marco Polo, Iimplore you to use Marco Polo.
It is a.
A video messaging app, andit's my favorite thing.
I keep in touch with a lot ofmy favorite people via Marco Polo.
(12:54):
We just send a video and thenwhenever the person, you know, the
other person has time, theycan listen to the video and respond
via their own video.
And it's such a nice way to beable to see the person, but you're
still just able to get to themwhen you, you know, different than
like a phone call when theyneed your attention immediately.
But I am very grateful forMarco Polo and the way it's helped
(13:16):
me to stay in communication,really constant communication with
so many people that I don'tget to see on a daily basis.
So she and I had aconversation last week, kind of like
a deep and emotionalconversation, you know, about our
faith and about her feelingsregarding what God says about homosexuality
(13:41):
and her just her not beingable to reconcile sort of a loving
God with homosexuality being asin when it's just about love and
God is love and why would henot want people to live out, you
know, what makes them happyand loved?
(14:02):
And it was a really hardconversation because I had to, you
know, share with her that Isee it differently and that I do
see it as sin.
And it's because God says thatit is.
And it's in the Bible.
It's in both the Old and theNew Testaments.
And I believe that the Bibleis the ultimate truth.
(14:24):
And I was trying to talk alittle bit about how, like, sexual
activity with the same sex isconsidered sin, but it's not because
we hate or exclude A personthat desires that, but because it
falls outside of what God,what his original design was for
(14:48):
sexuality and marriage.
Okay, so the Bibleconsistently presents sexual intimacy
as something created for oneman and one woman within the covenant
of marriage.
It's.
It's referenced in both theNew and Old Testaments.
Same sex sexual behavior iscontrary to God's design.
(15:12):
And it's not that the Biblesingles out gay people, but it teaches
that all people are born witha sinful nature.
And we each have desires,sexual or otherwise, that may not
align with God's will.
We all have them.
The Christian message isn'tabout condemning one specific group,
but about God offering graceand transformation to everyone through
(15:33):
what Jesus did for us on the cross.
I read this book one timecalled Gay Girl Good God by Jackie
Hill Perry.
And it's like, it's about aChristian woman who was gay and that
it wasn't about becomingstraight, but about surrendering
(15:54):
every part of life to God'sdesign, right?
And how that leads to deep joyand freedom in your life.
So it's such a tough one.
It really, really is adifficult conversation.
(16:14):
But it leads me more into somethings that I've been learning as
I read a couple of books.
I've been reading aboutspiritual warfare and about our God
given purpose in our life.
So I just wanted to share thatwith you.
And again, I know this podcastis different than it used to be,
(16:38):
but I cannot help but shareabout God and what the gift of his
son's sacrifice has done forme in my own life and for all of
you.
And I just want.
I just want us all to be inheaven together one day.
And I feel so called to sharethis message.
And I don't see it changing.
(17:01):
For all of you who loved itbefore, I don't see it changing.
I'm not going to apologize.
We all grow, right?
We all change.
And I.
Your girl has just has changed.
And so much about the things Iused to share about, I see are sinful
and are not helpful.
(17:21):
And maybe they're relatablebecause sin is relatable, right?
We can all relate to sin.
But you're going to relatetoday to what I have to share with
you about.
About what the devil is doingand about temptation because we all
are tempted.
So again, this just reminds meof this conversation I had with my
(17:44):
friend because it made herquestion God, it made her doubt him,
and it made her wrestle withwhat she.
She knows of God because toher, God is love.
And why can't people just loveeach Other.
So the thing about God is hecan handle all of your questions,
he can handle your doubts, hecan handle your wrestling.
(18:06):
But be aware that the enemyuses this as a tactic.
So his goal is to make youwalk away from your faith, right?
And the easiest way to do thatis to make you question and doubt
goodness of God.
So people, some of thesequestions that people often ask are,
is God real?
Is God good?
Is God powerful?
(18:27):
Is God for me?
And can I trust God's people,which is the church?
The enemy will cause us todoubt one or all of these truths.
Sometimes faith gets tough.
Just like what I just sharedwith you.
Faith gets tough in this area.
This friend of mine, she has aniece who is gay.
And her inclination, hernatural inclination, is just to love
(18:51):
her and support her inwhatever it is that makes her happy,
right?
And I think as Christians,sometimes we get in trouble because
we think we're supposed to be happy.
So again, the enemy's gonnacause us to doubt one or all of those
questions.
And sometimes faith gets toughand causes us to wrestle, question
(19:11):
and doubt.
Some will try to take fromChristianity what serves them right.
Like, they'll take salvation,they'll take heaven, they'll take
crying out to God for help indifficult times.
But then they want to leavethe rest.
They want to leave whatdoesn't serve them.
They want to leave the hard stuff.
They don't want to have to dieto themselves or their selfish desires.
(19:33):
They want to live forthemselves and not live for Christ.
They don't want to admit theirsins and repent of them.
If you find yourselfquestioning whether God is good because
of a pain or loss that youhave suffered, know that God never
desired for his children to suffer.
(19:54):
Right?
So again, what.
What are these tough things?
It can be so many things, butlike the loss of a child, that is
one thing.
I have always thought I couldnever survive that I believe.
I don't even want to say Ibelieve that I could because I don't
want to.
I don't ever want toexperience that level of pain.
(20:18):
But based on what I have seenGod get me through, I trust that
he would get me through that.
But my goodness, it is mybiggest fear in life.
But he has never desired forus to suffer in that way.
We.
I talked about this last week,but in Genesis 3, because of the
Fall, the world that we livein is not the.
(20:41):
The world that God everintended us to live in.
His first desire was for us todwell with him in peace, that our
hearts would be filled with joy.
And we would be surrounded by perfection.
And that's what we can lookforward to once we get to heaven.
But here, the little G God ofthis world, which is the enemy, has
(21:01):
come to steal, kill and destroy.
Is it crazy that the enemySatan is the God of this world?
That is so sad.
But he uses every bit ofsuffering to drive a wedge between
us and God.
He delights in our suffering.
He loves when we suffer, andeven more so when we blame God for
(21:24):
the suffering.
It's all part of his ultimateplan to separate us eternally.
That's his whole goal.
Part of the enemy's tactic tocause suffering is through temptation.
He wants to use temptation todestroy you, but God wants to use
it to develop you.
Every temptation is anopportunity to choose rightly and
(21:45):
do what is good.
Have you heard of the fruit ofthe Spirit?
I've talked about it on here.
But the fruit of the spirit islove, joy, peace, patience, kindness,
goodness, faithfulness,gentleness and self love control.
To have the fruit of theSpirit is to be like Jesus.
But what I know about fruit isthat it ripens slowly.
(22:06):
Similarly, God develops thefruit in your life by allowing you
to experience circumstances inwhich you are tempted to express
the exact opposite quality.
What I know about fruit isthat it ripens slowly.
Similarly, God develops thefruit in your life by allowing you
to experience circumstances inwhich you are tempted to express
(22:26):
the exact opposite quality.
The development of character.
The development of the fruitalways involves a choice.
And temptation provides that opportunity.
We learn to love by dealingwith those who seem unlovable.
We learn real joy in the midstof sorrow.
(22:46):
We develop peace in times ofconfusion and chaos.
When we choose to trust or God.
We develop patience incircumstances where we are forced
to wait.
God uses the oppositesituation of each fruit to allow
us a choice.
You can't claim to be good ifyou've never been tempted to be bad.
Our integrity is built bydefeating temptation.
(23:11):
So every time you defeattemptation, you become more like
Jesus.
You develop the fruit of the spirit.
Temptation follows a four stepprocess that begins with a thought.
And this thought is suggestedby the enemy.
God does not tempt you.
So it's.
It's begins with a thoughtthat you give into an evil desire.
(23:35):
Temptation begins within us.
It always starts in the mind.
In fact, Jesus said fromwithin a person.
I'm sorry for from within, outof a person's heart come evil thoughts,
sexual immorality, theft,murder, adultery, greed, wickedness,
deceit, eagerness for lustfulpleasure, envy, slander, pride and
(23:57):
foolishness.
All These vile things comefrom within.
And James tells us that thereis a whole army of evil desires within
you.
The next step is doubt.
Satan wants you to questionwhether sin is really wrong.
So that's back to the homosexuality.
Like my friend was using allof these examples like this has been
(24:19):
like, since the beginning oftime, people have been involved in
homosexuality and it's justtrying to.
Trying to doubt the truth ofGod, right?
We can't believe.
We can't believe in Jesus andbe saved when we don't actually believe
(24:41):
that what he says is the truth.
So the third is deception.
So once he gets youquestioning, Satan offers a lie to
replace what God has said is truth.
Step four is disobedience.
So when you have this lie thatyou've replaced with God's truth,
then you act on the thoughtyou've been toying with in your mind.
(25:03):
You give in to the temptation,and that's when it becomes sin.
It was never sin.
Temptation is not sinful.
It's just the act of givinginto the sin.
Christians will never grow outof temptation.
Temptation is part of being human.
In this fallen world, it isnot sinful or shameful to be tempted.
Even Jesus was tempted, but henever sinned.
(25:26):
Temptation only becomes sinfulwhen you give into it.
The closer you grow to God,the more you will be tempted.
Tempted.
The enemy has a target.
There is a target on your backonce you've accepted Jesus into your
life.
The enemy, you're a threat tothe enemy once you've done that.
So it's important to recognizeyour pattern of temptation and be
(25:47):
prepared for it.
So there are situations andcircumstances that will cause you
to stumble almost immediately.
These situations are unique toyour own weaknesses.
And Satan knows exactly whattrips you up, so he is constantly
at work trying to get you intothose circumstances.
(26:08):
So it's important to askyourself, when am I most tempted?
Where am I most tempted?
Who am I with when I'm most tempted?
We all know there are peoplewho you can spend time with that
you end up making decisionsyou wouldn't have made otherwise.
How do I feel when I'm most tempted?
Am I lonely?
Am I sad?
Am I hurt?
(26:28):
Am I angry?
All of these negative feelingscan lead us to giving into temptation.
So identify your pattern andthen avoid at all costs those situations
as much as humanly possible.
Ask God to help you overcome temptation.
Jesus is sympathetic to our struggles.
He understands our weaknesses,for he faced all the same temptations
(26:51):
we do.
Yet he did not sin.
The Bible says he faced allthe same Temptations we do.
And yet he did not sin.
So come to the Lord boldly andask him for the power to resist temptation
and then expect him to provide it.
1 Corinthians 10:13 tells us,no temptation has overtaken you except
what is common to mankind.
(27:12):
And God is faithful.
He will not let you be temptedbeyond what you can bear.
But when you are tempted, hewill also provide a way out so that
you can endure it.
The devil is sneaky.
And he knows you.
He knows you so well.
He knows how easily you can be tempted.
And he knows exactly what touse to get you to act on those temptations.
(27:37):
I know there are parts of theBible that are so, so difficult to
understand.
And we reason in our own mindwhy we can make things okay, right?
We can.
We can do it becauseculturally things have become okay.
Culturally and in moderntimes, we have made sin.
(28:00):
It's just become so.
What's the word I want?
It's become so normalized thatwe think it's actually okay.
And it's not.
Just like homosexuality is a sin.
Sex before marriage is a sin.
And how normal normal have wemade that?
It is not easy to stay free of sin.
It is not easy to not be tempted.
(28:21):
It is not.
In fact, it's impossible notto be tempted.
But God will give us a way out.
There are a lot of questionsthat we're going to need to ask God
when we get to heaven.
We're not going to get thoseanswers this side of heaven.
But the simple truth about sexoutside of marriage and homosexuality
(28:43):
is that is just simply outsidethe design that God had for us.
Sex is something that is to bebetween one man and one woman inside
of the covenant of marriage.
And anything outside of thatis a sin.
Thankfully, God knows we willsin and he gives us a way out.
He gave us Jesus.
(29:04):
It is what we celebrated yesterday.
His son, the perfect Lamb ofGod, the sinless Lamb of God, died
to save us from our sinsbecause he knew we could not live
up to his standards.
So pray on it.
Ask God to remove the temptation.
(29:25):
Ask God to help you throughthe temptation.
Ask God to help you tounderstand the temptation.
Start to learn to recognizeyour pattern so that you can keep
yourself out, out of placeswhere you're tempted.
I hope that some of this was valuable.
I say it every week.
I hope that that resonatedwith somebody.
Even if it's just one of you.
I hope that you can.
(29:46):
I don't know, maybe it madeyou recognize a sin in your life
that you can ask for,forgiveness for and repent of because
that is what God wants for you.
I hope you have the bestMonday I'm grateful for.
That's a wrap on anotherepisode of Activate Stay up to Date
by followingristonleighballard on Instagram.
(30:06):
And if this episode made youlaugh, offered value, or simply entertained
you, please like share andgive a five star review on itunes.
Thanks for being here.
Love y'all.
Later.
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