May 1, 2025 • 52 mins
In this inspiring episode of the H.E.A.L. Her Podcast, Makini Smith welcomes Kathryne Mejias, the trailblazing founder of Born for More. Together, they explore how life’s most challenging moments — including divorce — can become opportunities for profound healing, empowerment, and authentic reinvention.
Kathryne shares her personal journey from self-doubt to self-realization, offering practical wisdom on how to realign with your true self, rebuild confidence, and create a fulfilling new chapter after life-altering transitions.
This conversation is a must-listen for anyone ready to turn pain into purpose and reclaim their personal power.
Key Topics Covered:
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Redefining divorce as a new beginning
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How to rebuild your identity and confidence after loss
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The importance of authentic self-expression
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The power of resilience and community healing
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Embracing the belief that you are Born for More
About Kathryne Mejias: Kathryne Mejias is the founder of Born for More, an intuitive coach, event creator, and author of the upcoming book The Soulful Divorcee. She helps women navigate life's transitions with courage, grace, and soul-centered empowerment.
Connect with Kathryne Mejias: Website
Stay connected with us online:
Send feedback/questions to info@makinismith.com
Submit guest suggestions HERE
Make a donation to keep the show going!
Podcast music produced by:
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Makini Smith (00:00):
I'm Makini Smith. After going through a
divorce, my sister passing away, experiencing narcissistic
abuse and some significant health scares, I
realized through sharing my story that I
wasn't alone in my suffering. Suffering, subjective
distress generated by the experience of being
out of balance in a deep dive
to holistically heal mind, body and soul
(00:22):
is where I discovered peace, clarity and
connection. It is impossible to be truly
wise without some real life hardship and
we cannot develop post traumatic wisdom without
making it through and most importantly, through
it together. Social connection builds resilience and
resilience helps create post traumatic wisdom. And
(00:45):
that wisdom leads to hope. Hope for
you and others, witnessing and participating in
your healing and hope for your community.
A healthy community is a healing community
and a healing community is full of
hope because it has seen its own
people weather, survive and thrive. Have you
(01:23):
ever faced struggles that made you question
your strength? In my first book, A
Walk in My Stilettos, how to get
through the Struggle with Grace, I share
my personal journey through adversity, teen motherhood,
divorce and loss, showing you how to
navigate life's toughest seasons with grace. This
book isn't just my story, it's my
roadmap to resilience. So grab your copy
(01:46):
today and start walking in your own
power. Available now on Amazon or mckinney
smith.com Today's guest is Catherine Mejias. She
is the trailblazing founder of Born for
More, a platform redefining how women navigate
life's transitions, especially divorce. As a visionary
(02:08):
event creator, author and energy specialist and
intuitive coach, she's dedicated to turning life's
toughest moments into into opportunities for empowerment
and reinvention. Katherine views divorce not as
an ending, but as a chance to
realign with one's true self, rebuild confidence,
and create a new chapter in life
(02:30):
that feels authentic and fulfilling. Through her
coaching, dynamic events and highly anticipated book,
the Soulful Divorcee, Katherine is inspiring women
to embrace their power and rediscover their
worth. Born for More isn't just a
brand, it's a movement, a community where
(02:50):
women can reclaim their edge, reconnect with
their passions and step boldly into their
next chapter. So please welcome to the
show Katherine Mejias.
Kathryne Mejias (03:03):
Thank you so much Makini for this
beautiful opportunity with you today.
Makini Smith (03:08):
Thank you so much for agreeing to
come on and share your story and
your expertise and your wisdom with us
today. I know that there are many
women that are listening around the globe
that will completely resonate not only with
your story, but the gems that you
are about to Share. So I'm excited
to jump right in.
Kathryne Mejias (03:27):
Me as well.
Makini Smith (03:28):
Where should we start? So I. I
love to start the show with an
Iceberger question, because I feel like as.
As people, you know, we've been conditioned
with our belief systems from, you know,
our. Our childhood, from our parents, from
our environments that we grew up in,
from the experiences that we've. We've had
in life. So before we get to
where you are presently, I would love
(03:50):
to know what was Catherine like as
a young girl and who or what
did she want to be?
Kathryne Mejias (03:57):
Well, Catherine, myself, as a young girl,
I was so shy. I was and
still am a big introvert. Introvert and
very unique. And I've always tried to
fit into the mold. You know, whether
that was to join the popular crowd
or just have friends or even when
(04:20):
it came to jobs, I always felt
the need to bend myself into what
was kind of. I thought was accept.
Yeah. Acceptable and not honor my authentic
self and my uniqueness. And today, I
am so different. I am all about,
you know, my authentic self, and I.
(04:40):
I celebrate that.
Makini Smith (04:41):
I love it. Listen, I'm a fellow
introvert. I get it. Love it.
Kathryne Mejias (04:46):
How did we end up on a
podcast? I don't know. Somehow.
Makini Smith (04:51):
Honestly, I believe that, like, okay, again,
with conditioning. Like, we've been conditioned to
believe that introverts only have, you know,
one way of being or that, you
know, we, like, yes, we are shy,
but as introverts, it's really about how
we recharge. Right? Like, we need alone
time to recharge, where extroverts need to
(05:12):
be around people to, you know, gain
their energy. So there's so much people
don't understand about introverts, but we won't
even go there right now.
Kathryne Mejias (05:20):
That's a whole other podcast.
Makini Smith (05:22):
Exactly. Exactly. Okay, so let's catch us
up to speed. Give us the. The
Coles Notes version of how you got
to where you are today.
Kathryne Mejias (05:33):
So I'll try and condense it. So
being an introvert, I tried to fit
in and for work, I really always
enjoyed traveling. So I didn't know what
to do with my life. And my
mom's like, well, you know, you love
traveling. Why don't you become a flight
attendant? So I tried it out, and
(05:54):
I made it to become a flight
attendant. All the training, I worked for
Air Canada for several years, and that
actually helped me on my journey because,
again, being shy and an introvert, I
was forced to connect and communicate with
people, do all the PA announcements, do
all the things. And at that time,
(06:14):
that Was, you know, really stepping out
of my comfort zone. So I did
that. And that really allowed me to
explore different parts of the world and
take courses from the best teachers when
it came to my passion, which was
everything to do with the unseen, the
metaphysical, the crystal, therapy, energy, healing, you
(06:35):
name it. I've, you know, went, took
a plane somewhere and took a course,
and. And so that was a beautiful
time in my life, but it never
really felt like what I was meant
to do. I always felt like I
was meant to do something more, but
I didn't know what that more was.
And working for Air Canada also allowed
(06:57):
me to take time off and work
in the fashion industry. So I styled
and dressed women from all walks of
life, and that was awesome. That was
such a beautiful experience. But again, it
wasn't like what I was meant to
do. I just felt this. This potential,
this untapped potential within me. And I
(07:17):
knew it had to do with the
unseen and diving into mindset, reset, and
healing, but I didn't completely grasp what
it was. And during that time, I
also got married. I had a beautiful
son, Luca. And during, I think it
(07:40):
was my birthday, December 3rd, where I
decided to take my side hustle at
the time, which was Reiki and healing
and, you know, working with people one
on one. But it was kind of
a side thing. I decided to incorporate
my company, Born for More, because I
wanted to expand on that, and that
(08:03):
was basically kind of where it stemmed
from. The name Born for More was
for me feeling like I was meant
for something more, but never really having
that more until I discovered the more
that I was searching for was beneath
all those limiting beliefs that I had.
So by releasing that, my life started
(08:23):
to look more like that more I
was searching for.
Makini Smith (08:28):
I love it. I love it. Okay,
so you often speak about turning life's
toughest moments into opportunities for empowerment. What
was your personal turning point that led
you to this transformation?
Kathryne Mejias (08:45):
So I've had many transformations throughout my
life. I have, as we mentioned before,
the recording different tattoos during the different
to celebrate the transformations. But the when
it came to my Born for More
company, it was one day where I
decided, I'm like, am I going to
live my life like this, or am
(09:07):
I going to connect to that potential
within me and access that more? However,
if I wanted to access that more,
was I willing to release everything that
didn't align with the more? And that
was something that a lot of people
face. And some people, you know, they
stay where they are, and I didn't
want to be that Person that woke
(09:28):
up at 80 or 90 thinking, what
if I did do a change? What
would my life look like? And so
there was a lot of fear that
came with the more with accessing them
more. But I'm just, you know, that
person that says, yes, there is fear,
but what lies beyond the fear and
(09:49):
fear is just the edge of the
breakthrough. Right. So I decided to go
with the, you know, the accessing that
potential within me. And that was when
I decided to leave my, my ex
husband and which was a huge kind
of, it's a huge rebirth in a
(10:11):
sense because you go from, you know,
accepting the decision that you make and
then you don't realize like, you know,
that there's going to be a roller
coaster with that, but you don't know
to what extent until you're in it.
And so there's the highs, you know,
(10:31):
woohoo, I'm free. And then the oh
my God, what am I doing? I
didn't.
Makini Smith (10:37):
Completely relate, you know, like I mentioned
before we started recording, like I got
divorced in 2009, so it's been quite
the journey. So I can relate to
like everything you're saying. And I guess
what I'm, I'm thinking about the, the
listeners and the women that are listening
right now. Even if they're not going
through like a divorce, but even if
(10:59):
they're going through a breakup with someone
who, they're common law or anything like
that, there is that, that fear, that
fear of the unknown, that fear of,
you know, what does this mean for
my life next? What, you know, who
am I? You know, without this idea
of what I had, the future that
I have with this person, you know,
stepping out of your comfort zone, all
those things. I would love if we
can unpack that some more. For the
(11:21):
listeners that are listening that are maybe
even afraid to leave or you know,
divorce their partners even though they're unhappy.
Kathryne Mejias (11:29):
Absolutely. So it doesn't only happen with
divorce and breakup, it also happens with
jobs and friends. Right. Like sometimes you're
friends with someone and you have that
history, but you just don't align anymore
and there, it doesn't fill you up
like it used to and there's that
guilt, right? Oh, am I going to
hurt that person? So with the, the
(11:50):
ex husband or your partner, oh, am
I going to hurt that person? And
so it's always putting the other person
first and then suppressing ourselves and our
own desires and knowing what will benefit
us. We kind of put that aside
and so it's reevaluating ourselves, our Desires
(12:10):
and why we're doing the things we
want. And then also to build that
relationship with the self, right? Become our
best friend. And coming out of a
marriage for myself and a lot of
the women I work with, we have
neglected ourselves. And therefore, what does that
do? Our self worth is gone. So
(12:31):
we come out of relationships, we have
no self worth. And it's all about
rebuilding that from the inside out by
taking the time we need, not being
hard on ourselves. You know, I'm big
on looking at myself in the mirror
and telling myself like, yeah, you got
(12:51):
this. You know, I. I'm just. I'm
just a funny person in the mirror.
Like, my son looks at me, he
thinks I'm funny, he just joins in,
but I'm like, yeah, you got this.
You're worth it. And it's this constant
coaching ourselves, right? Because that's the way
it is. We gotta do it on.
(13:12):
On time. When these limiting beliefs come,
we gotta connect to them in the
time and space that they happen in
order to reframe our thinking and redirect
our energy.
Makini Smith (13:26):
Absolutely. You know, I agree with you
with, like, you know, whether it be
friends or jobs or a breakup, it's.
It's a form of grief, right? We're
grieving the life that we imagined that
we would have with this other person.
And even if the relationship wasn't toxic,
there's still a sense of reevaluating self,
(13:47):
you know, that. That whole reflection of,
okay, well, what does this mean for
me? Who am I now? You know,
how. How do the things like my.
My future view of my life? What
does that look like for me now?
Like, all of those questions that we,
you know, now ask ourselves after divorce.
Can I ask, like, how long were
you married for?
Kathryne Mejias (14:07):
Okay, so here's the thing. I am
a stat, okay? Because the stats from
Google say the average age of divorce
is between 41 and 43, which I
was 41 and a half. The average
length of divorce of marriage is eight
years. I was married eight years. And
(14:30):
most of the time, 70% of the
time, women are the ones to initiate
it. And so I fall into those
stats. But here's even something more interesting,
is that my wedding date was August
8, 2015, which is 888. And for
those who follow the astrology, it's the
Lionsgate portal. So, 888. Eight years. Date
(14:53):
of separation, August 8th.
Makini Smith (14:57):
Wow. Wow. Wow.
Kathryne Mejias (15:01):
Yeah. Isn't that wild? And, yeah, like,
it just happened. Right? So.
Makini Smith (15:06):
Wow. Wow. Well, I. I even love
that you shared those stats Cause I,
I definitely didn't. Didn't know that, like,
you know, you hear stats of, like,
you know, 50% of marriages end a
divorce. You know, the. I guess the
typical stats that we hear. But thank
you for sharing those stats about length
of marriage and, and age even, because
now I'm. I'm like, thinking about myself
and I was like, well, I was
with my ex husband for eight and
(15:27):
a half years. Oh, there you go.
And I'm thinking, I'm like, I. We
got divorced when I was 39. Okay.
Yeah, I. I can't remember, but, yeah,
somewhere around then. But, yeah. Good to
know.
Kathryne Mejias (15:43):
Those dads, I think when women hit
their 40s, right, there's this whole reevaluation
of the self. And sometimes it coincides
with perimenopause, all the hormonal shifts. Sometimes
it doesn't. It's just like reevaluating where
you are in your life and deciding,
hey, do I want to continue like
this or not? And that's kind of
(16:04):
like in your 40s where you do
that. You know, you have. You're at
that point. So I think that's why
it happens.
Makini Smith (16:11):
Yeah. Wow. And now I'm thinking, I'm
like, hold on. I'm trying to remember
how old I was when I got
the divorce, but anyways, not important. So
for. For many people, divorce can feel
like an ending. How do you shift
your perspective so that you see it
as a beginning?
Kathryne Mejias (16:31):
Like, I. Yeah, so it's a new
beginning because you have no idea where
your life is going. Like, it's all
a new adventure. And for myself and
a lot of the women I work
with, you know, there's some kind of
clear path. Okay, I got married. I
have, you know, a child. I have
(16:51):
my career, and you know exactly where
you're going. And then when divorce happens,
which can be like a surprise or
you can feel it coming, but it's
a redirect. And I always say it's.
It's a gift from the universe because
you can turn lemons into margaritas, right?
You can celebrate. You can celebrate the
(17:11):
new adventure that you're on. And not
everything has to be so controlled and
so calculated. And when you leave space
to step out of what you think
was, that leaves so much room for
expansion, for. For meeting new people, for
living in a place that you may
not have thought, and for pursuing dreams
that you never had the ability to.
(17:33):
To create. Right? And a lot of
women coming out of marriages, they start
their business and they become so successful
because all the. This Energy is now
put into their passion. And when you
are living in alignment doing your passion,
things just have a way of expanding.
Makini Smith (17:51):
Mm. I'm a living example of that.
I filed for my divorce and became
an entrepreneur at the same time. I,
you know, had three kids, a mortgage,
a dog. But that passion to create
this new life, it's a lot. I've
been a full time entrepreneur for 15
(18:11):
and a half years now. Oh, wow.
Kathryne Mejias (18:14):
Yeah, that happened, right? And it's like
a sense of freedom. A new sense
of freedom. And congratulations to you.
Makini Smith (18:21):
Thank you. Thank you. So, okay, tell
us about your new book, the Soulful
Divorcee. What can readers expect from this
book and what impact do you hope
that it has or that it leaves
with them?
Kathryne Mejias (18:36):
So, okay, so this is going to
be my second book. It's launching in
a few months, so hopefully by May
or June. And my first book was
called Soulful Beauty. And that one was
a bit about my story and finding
the inner beauty. Because a lot of
people, they look at themselves in the
mirror, they criticize, they, you know, do
(18:57):
all the things. And I'm like, no.
Women, ladies, beautiful beings. You have to
tap into your inner self, right, and
find that inner beauty. And that book
was written in three weeks. It was
basically, you know, I woke up one
morning and my inner guidance is like,
okay, you're writing a book. And I'm
like, all right, I've never done this
(19:18):
before, but do it. So it kind
of flowed through me. And then I
put it aside, and then, because I
didn't know what to do with it,
and until someone is like, you gotta
get this out. So then I, all
of a sudden, I connected with an
editor and got the ball rolling on
that. And after I finished that, I
(19:39):
said, I am never going through that
again. Right. You get it. Editing is
so brutal.
Makini Smith (19:49):
It's. Oh, my God.
Kathryne Mejias (19:53):
And then when I left my husband,
I just started to journal. So I
journaled and journaled. And then after so
many pages, my inner guidance again is
like, oh, this is going to be
a book. And I'm like, oh, wonderful.
So not, you know, I just went
with it, right, because I. I kind
(20:15):
of released the resistance and. And just
flowed with it. And so what people
can expect is part of it is
my journey. And I offer tools that
I have used throughout my exploration and
my journey. And it also consists of,
you know, the. The dating experiences that
I had, because that was like a
(20:35):
whole wild ride in itself. I mean,
you know, you. You kiss someone for
the first time after being with someone
for so long. And it just is
like a teenager. I had all these
feelings and then. But then there's the
next day, you know, I was crying
because I'm like, oh, my God. I'm,
you know, my old life. And. And
(20:56):
it's kind of all these emotions that
I want women to know that they're
not alone in this and never know
exactly what you can expect when you're
going through such a transformation. But it.
It. I'm not a unique story. I'm
just a woman who has shared her
thoughts, who is. Wants to inspire women
(21:17):
into connecting with their vision and make
things happen, take action on that. Because
life is so short.
Makini Smith (21:26):
I love that. And I love that
you chose to share your experiences of,
like, the roller coaster of emotions that
we deal with after divorce. Because, you
know, we. We see it all the
time, whether it be social media or,
you know, any other place where sometimes
someone is going through or has gone
through a divorce, but they get stuck
in that. That space. You know, they
(21:46):
don't want to date. They think that,
you know, all people of the opposite
sex are now evil, and they have
all these negative, I guess, filters of
the world. Right. But you sharing. Okay,
yeah, It's a roller coaster of emotions.
These are. These are normal feelings. These
are things that we go through. These
are, you know, people don't feel like
they're alone, but also where you talk
(22:09):
about, like, rediscovering self, because I think
especially if you're in an unhealthy relationship,
the focus is on the other person
and the children and all the things
that they want you to do, and
you kind of lose yourself. You know,
all the things, the vision that you
may have had for your life, you
know, may have disappeared, but being able
(22:30):
to now tap back into that and
understand who we are and, you know,
the. The purpose on our life is
not just to be a wife or
just to be a mom or any
of those things. So I. I love
it.
Kathryne Mejias (22:45):
And it's also the dating journey. I
used it in order to bring it
back to myself and see what kind
of people I am attracting. Right. And
that'll tell you if you have shifted
or not, and if you haven't, what
is triggering you again, bringing it back
to yourself and seeing what you need
to work on in order to move
(23:07):
past and not end up in the
exact same relationship you just left. So
I use it really as a fun
experience in order to see, like, oh,
I'm still attracting that type of guy.
I need to shift. Right? So, yeah.
And then it Works. So I, I
wouldn't recommend, honestly jumping in right away
into a serious relationship. I would just
(23:29):
recommend to go have fun and explore
and get to know yourself again.
Makini Smith (23:34):
Yes, I totally agree with you. I
think it's important for us to have
a true understanding of who we are.
I think a lot of people, we
spend so much time focusing on other
people, whether it be our partners or
our family or whoever, but we don't
spend that much time getting to know
ourselves. And just like you, I utilized
my, My divorce as a chance to
(23:55):
get to know me, what my likes
were, what made me tick, what you
know, I didn't like, you know, how,
how I reacted to things, what triggered
me, what didn't trigger me. So get
us getting to know ourselves the same
way how, you know, we would, you
know, our, our best friend or, you
know, someone that we're dating, whatever. We
can recognize their voice when we hear
it or recognize them from, you know,
(24:16):
across the room at the back of
their head. Many of us don't take
that time to get to know ourselves
in that same way. But the more
that we get to know ourselves, the
better understanding we have of other people.
Kathryne Mejias (24:26):
Definitely. And you know what, Makini? I
think people don't take the time to
do that because it's work that you
cannot see. And it's like, oh, but
am I doing anything? So people think
it's a waste of time and you
can't really see it until you know
you've done it. And then waiting a
while because there's always some kind of
(24:46):
delay between the inner self and when
that gets manifested on the outer self.
And it's in that delay that people
start doubting. So I think that's why,
or a big reason why people don't.
Don't do it. They're like, it's, it's
not doing anything, but it really is.
And I'm.
Makini Smith (25:04):
And I also love that you utilize
dating as like a, I don't want
to say a qualitative research to, like,
understand yourself more. Right. Because I, I
think that it's also not as common
for us to look at our history
of type of people that we've dated
to understand ourselves. I think it's very
(25:26):
common for someone to be like, yeah,
well, you know, all of my exes
were toxic or what have you. But
not looking at our contribution or our
accountability. I know after my divorce, I
looked at some of the, you know,
longer relationships that I had, and I
think it was my son who actually
said it to me first. And it
was years ago, so he was probably
in elementary school at the time. And
(25:47):
he's like, you attract narcissist. So I
was like, ouch. I had to do
my research, and then I started, you
know, therapy and understanding, like, narcissists, people
with narcissistic personality disorder, they're attracted to
empaths. Like, so now, okay, am I
setting proper boundaries now? You know, looking
(26:08):
at characteristic types and all these things
and understanding healthy relationships, understanding red flags,
understanding all of these things that I
didn't know before, but through dating, getting
to see a pattern. So now that
I can shift that. So now I'm
presently in a healthy relationship, engaged and
getting married.
Kathryne Mejias (26:27):
Wow. Congratulations. See, that's a shift. You
know, you've done the inner work, right.
And there's kind of the. The validation
for you.
Makini Smith (26:34):
Yeah, it's wild. I'm just thinking about
how you've utilized your experiences. I guess,
like I said before, just to understand
yourself on a deeper level. Right. It's
the reflection of looking back at, you
know, our connections with other people, because
they say that that can be, you
know, a mirror of us or things
(26:56):
within us that we haven't healed if,
you know, depending on our upbringing and
all of those things. So it's. It's
great for the women that are listening
to understand that shifting their perspective on
how they view these breakups and the
actions that they take after can be
so beneficial.
Kathryne Mejias (27:16):
Well, I have a master's in unhealthy
relationships. So I have been through, like,
to be totally transparent, every kind of
toxic relationship you could imagine, and I
didn't get it. I'm like, why am
I attracting these, you know, abusive, mentally,
physically, like, you name it, it, I've
been there. And that's why I can
in, like, pinpoint in someone their vibration,
(27:40):
because I know what it is. Right?
Makini Smith (27:42):
Yeah.
Kathryne Mejias (27:42):
And so I used it. I used
it. I'm like, okay, well, I took
responsibility because it may not be, like,
my fault that I'm in a situation,
but it's my responsibility to shift it
and get myself out of it and
shift my life. And that's where a
lot of women, they feel like victims
and they just. Just don't take ownership.
(28:04):
I'm like, no, change it. Let's take
action and do something about it. And
so I use relationships to learn more
about myself. But in fact, I use
every day as a learning experience because
every day is a manifestation of my
current vibration. So if, you know, I
go to the grocery store and someone's
(28:25):
rude, and I take it personally, I'm
like, okay, well, what is it in
me today? How can I up level
myself? Because I think when you're in
a state of complete alignment, everything no
longer affects you the way it did.
You know, you're at the center of
your life and nothing can affect you.
And that's what alignment means to me.
Makini Smith (28:47):
Yeah. And I love that you also
mentioned that, because I feel like it's
very easy for someone to play the
victim and say, well, all these bad
things are happening to me, you know,
I'm the victim. Woe is me. But
when we understand how things work, when
we understand how energy and spirit works,
when we understand how vibration works, then
we can understand what we're actually broadcasting,
(29:09):
what frequency we're tuning into. And instead
of like, okay, you know, bad situation
after bad situation after bad situation and
saying, ugh, like why, why is this
happening to me? Okay, well, what thoughts
are you thinking? What feelings are you
feeling? And now what, what actions are
you taking? What's the reaction to that?
Like us understanding how we contribute to
(29:31):
these or how we attract these because
we're like magnets.
Kathryne Mejias (29:34):
Exactly. And then using it to our
advantage. Right. It's great to, to know.
But then you gotta dig into it
and do all the work that no
one sees.
Makini Smith (29:43):
Absolutely.
Kathryne Mejias (29:44):
You're not lazy. When you're on your
sofa, you're like processing and getting into
yourself and. Yes.
Makini Smith (29:52):
So, okay, how do you guide women
who are struggling with self worth and
confidence after their, their separation or divorce?
Kathryne Mejias (30:02):
So I really help them again to
get connected to themselves. And a lot
of these women are in a state
of panic and anxiety that comes up
when you're doing all this shifting. So
which anxiety it goes, it makes you
go into your head and then you,
you know, you're all in there. Help
them get into their body by focusing
(30:24):
on the five senses, which is a
super easy way you can do anywhere
you are, go through your five senses.
And that's like your GPS in time
and space. And that will automatically bring
you into the present moment, into your
body. And then locate where in your
body is this tension? You know, if
you are feeling anxious, where is it?
(30:45):
And just bringing attention and awareness to
it. So bringing yourself back into your
body and being comfortable with it, because
I've noticed myself and the clients I
work with that when we are, we
have low self worth, we step out
of our body because we don't even
want to be in it. Right. And
(31:06):
I know what it feels like. I,
I hated myself at one point in
my life. And I know exactly what
I did. I just didn't want to
be in here. And I accepted and
settled things that I would never accept
today. And so let's bring ourselves back
to our body and watch our talk,
like, be hyper aware of what we
(31:28):
tell ourselves and rewrite our story in
the moment it happens again. The mirror
work. You know, celebrate yourself. Look at
your reflection. And at first, when you're
telling yourself, I love you, I'm proud
of you, it's going to feel weird,
right? But now I'm like, you're freaking
awesome. Might not know exactly all the
(31:53):
details, but you're awesome because you're living
on that edge of what you're doing.
And, and it's awesome. So it's all
about, so step one, reconnecting them to
their body and celebrating the smallest things
and doing the mirror work. Those are
just, you know, a few things that
(32:14):
they can do right away.
Makini Smith (32:16):
Absolutely. I, I love all of those
things and I'm, I'm thinking about each
thing that you mentioned. And I remember
when I was going through my divorce
and for probably a couple years after,
I was struggling really bad with fibromyalgia,
so it's like chronic muscle pain. And
they said, like, you know, the, the
(32:37):
symptoms and stuff were depression and anxiety.
And I know doctors like to label
things, especially when they don't fully understand
it. And when I started doing the
actual work, when I started working on
me, my actual, like, healing on a
deeper level, understanding that it wasn't the
fibromyalgia causing the, the aches and the
pains and the anxiety and depression, it
(32:58):
was the anxiety and depression causing the
aches. And they were labeling it as
fibromyalgia. So once I understood that, I
was able to now, like, be present
within my body and understand all the
signs. So that when I started to
feel the dis ease, which, you know,
anxiety is like the body of dis
ease, when I started to feel that,
(33:20):
then I could shift my thoughts and
my feelings, which then eliminated all the
physical symptoms. So it's like, you know,
there are people that have had fibromyalgia
for years and are suffering and in
all this pain. And when I was
able to understand how things actually work
and do the deep work, it was
understanding, once I felt the triggers, once
(33:42):
I felt anxious, any of those, those
things, those sensations within my body, paying
attention to that so that I was
being present so that I could shift
so that I didn't have to deal
with the physical repercussions of that. And
there was Something else you said that
I wanted to unpack, but I'm sure
it'll come to me later.
Kathryne Mejias (33:59):
And you were in your body, right?
So you could actually do the work
from inside out. And that's why it's
so important to bring it back to
yourself, because you can't figure that out
if you're, you know, outside and disconnected.
Makini Smith (34:14):
And I think that that's also a
very great point that you brought up,
because I feel like it's very easy
to want to numb the pain, you
know, whether that be through drugs, alcohol,
sex, I don't know, like, partying, whatever
it is that people use to numb.
But when you are willing to be
present with the emotions, then we can
(34:34):
actually address them and move through them.
It's the suppression of it and the
trying to numb it that causes depression,
because we're trying to pack it all
down. But that energy has to go
somewhere, and it goes within our body,
right? We're feeling it. It comes out.
Kathryne Mejias (34:51):
We gotta transmute it. And an interesting
story. Yesterday, I was feeling quite off.
Like, I woke up on, like, not
feeling right. And I'm always aware of
how I'm feeling, because I want to
transmute and alchemize and release whatever is
going on, because it comes like waves,
right? It's like waves from, you know,
(35:12):
our inner self. So my son. I
taught him how to see auras. And
so I'll ask him. He's seven. I'll
ask him what color I am, right?
So I asked him what color I
am, and he's like, oh, you're. You're
black, and you have yellow, but your
yellow is very small, you know? So
(35:34):
I'm like, well, how can I. So
I. I have fun with him. Like,
well, how can I expand my. My.
The yellow? And he's like, well, it's
gonna take seven days. And I was
actually shocked at what he was going
on.
Makini Smith (35:45):
I'm like, all right, I've taught you
well.
Kathryne Mejias (35:48):
He's like, yeah, it's gonna take you
seven days. You have to. Your heart
is gonna. Is gonna. What, do you
magically make it go away? But you
have to sit with it and. And.
And then your heart's gonna work it.
And I'm like, and how long is
it gonna take? Seven days. Not seven
months, I hope. He's like, yeah, it's
(36:10):
like you're sad. And so my job
now is like, okay, I notice this
energy inside of me. I. I'm not
aware of why I'm sad exactly, but
he could, and it brought awareness to
it. So let me dig into this
and look into it. Right. So that.
That's what happened a few days ago.
(36:31):
I'm still in search, but I feel
a lot better because I. I have
clarity and I have my. My little
guy who's me.
Makini Smith (36:39):
Listen, kid. Kids are way smarter than
we give them credit for. Honestly. There's
so much that we can learn from
them and their transparency and their unfiltered
self.
Kathryne Mejias (36:55):
Well, I got him to do that
because to find out who's lying and
who's not, he's like, how do I
know if this person's lying? I'm like,
well, look at what color they are.
Right. So how does that feel? And
so it kind of started like that
as a game, and now it.
Makini Smith (37:10):
Developed, I think I also think, like,
as introverts. And I don't know if
it's just introverts or also people who.
So I'm also like, hsp, highly sensitive
person. So it's like the. The energy.
And I strongly believe, like, energy, vibration,
spirit, it's all different labels for the
same thing. But it's like our ability
(37:33):
to be in tune with those things.
Like, I can be having a conversation
with someone, and I used to have
a friend who liked to embellish stories
all the time, and I'd be so
into, you know, the conversation, and then
soon as he starts to embellish, it's
like my energy level just, like, drunk.
(37:54):
It's like my intuition is like, I
cannot connect with this. Like, you know,
like, if we. If we. If we
tell ourselves a lie or if we
say a lie or if we say
the truth, it sets off a chemical
reaction within us. Right. So it's the
same if someone else says it. So
if we're in tune, we can feel
that.
Kathryne Mejias (38:12):
Oh, yeah, 100%. And that. That's quite
interesting because that happens to me as
well. And all the time, if someone
is, you know, going on and on,
I just feel myself like, no, it's
shutting down. I'm not. Not interested. I
just want truth. Yeah. And say it.
You know, I don't care if you're
(38:33):
strange, unique, weird. I don't care. You're
living truth. And that's what is important.
Makini Smith (38:39):
Yeah. I think that's why they say,
like, introverts don't do well with small
talk.
Kathryne Mejias (38:44):
It's. It's.
Makini Smith (38:45):
It's like something in us just, like,
shuts down when, you know, we hear
BS or, like, I don't know, like,
shallow conversation or any of those things.
Our energy is like, no, thank you.
Kathryne Mejias (38:57):
Are you a Sagittarius also?
Makini Smith (38:59):
No.
Kathryne Mejias (39:02):
I do that all the time.
Makini Smith (39:04):
Yeah, so true. I think it might
be the introvert energy or something. I
don't know.
Kathryne Mejias (39:11):
I'm the same, like. So.
Makini Smith (39:14):
Okay. Born for More. It's, it's, it's
not just a brand, it's a movement.
What does that movement look like for
you? And where do you see that
growing in the fruit in the future?
Kathryne Mejias (39:27):
So Born for More as a movement,
and it's all about connecting women to
businesses that they need when they're going
through transformation and through divorce or whatever
they need. And that is inner wellness.
Right. So whether that be a fitness
trainer or something that I don't do,
because I'm very big at working with
(39:48):
meditation and frequency, healing and helping women
shift, but I can't, I'm not, you
know, a fitness expert. So if they
want to redefine how they feel their
bodies, then I can connect them to
that. If they want to redo their
look, refresh their looks, then I know
someone who specializes in, in styling them.
(40:09):
Right. And even when they're coming out
of relationships, a lot of them don't
know anything about finances and real estate
because that happened to me. I had
no knowledge about what to do when
it came to my house. So I
have women owned businesses who help other
women when it comes to real estate
and who work specifically with divorced women.
(40:30):
So I didn't know divorce was such
a huge topic until I went through
it. And how many businesses are now
focused specifically on helping this niche, I
guess we can call it, to move
forward, whether that is mortgage or, you
know, maybe they need to refresh their
look or in ourselves. So it's basically
(40:51):
a platform to connect women with businesses.
And then I host large events such
as the upcoming one March 29, that
is has, I think, 46. We're at
46 vendors. We had such a large
amount of people interested. We have a
waiting list now for next year. And
it's all vendors that help women move
(41:13):
forward. And of course, I have the
amazing, inspiring Sophie Gregoire Trudeau, who has
gone through such a public divorce. And
she is an inspiration because she is
a perfect example of someone redefining themselves
in the public eye and reclaiming her
identity on her own. And she's a
yoga teacher and a coach and a
(41:35):
meditation teacher, and she's just an inspiration.
So I'll be having a fireside chat
with her. And what else is a
gift bag? There's drinks, there's photo ops.
It's just A beautiful time. I'm all
about connecting and community. And when we
have the community, we feel stronger together.
(41:55):
And it's not only for divorced women.
Again, everyone knows someone who's gone through
it. So why not support each other
as women and help each other rise?
Makini Smith (42:06):
Love it. Love it. What's been one
of the, I guess, most transformational success
stories from your work with women?
Kathryne Mejias (42:17):
Oh, that's a. That's a tough question.
I. I don't even know how to
answer that.
Makini Smith (42:22):
What's one story that comes to mind
of a woman that you've helped that
has inspired you to keep going?
Kathryne Mejias (42:32):
I think it. It's really. I know
this. I don't want to sound like
egotistical, but I'm really proud of myself
because I. Of where I came from
and who I am now. And I
keep on tapping into the future version
of myself that inspires me to keep
on going. And when I feel low
(42:52):
and down, I connect to that future
version of myself. And she keeps me
going. So I find everyone is so
has their own unique gifts. Another woman
that is. I can't say enough good
things about her is my dear friend
Lulu, who is working with me on
(43:14):
this event. She is my event architect,
and she is such a powerhouse. She
has gone through her own divorce and
she has been a constant woman of
inspiration to me because she has the
ability to see the potential within myself
that I didn't even know existed. And
she. A gift, right? She'll meet with
(43:36):
you and she'll be like, she'll connect
your heart and she'll make you see
that. So I like to surround myself
with positive women who are on the
path of living on their own edge
because that makes me live on my
edge and grow. And it's just like
a ripple effect into. Into the consciousness.
(43:59):
But Lulu, she. We even have the
same birthday. It's like the synchronicities are
crazy, right? And you'll meet her if
you come to the event as well.
Makini Smith (44:09):
So I'm looking forward to meeting her.
And I don't think it's egotistical that
you are proud of your own growth.
We should be, right? Especially if we've
come from. If we've had a lot
of growth, if we've evolved, if we've
been working intentionally on self improvement, I
think it's important to recognize your growth.
(44:29):
And when you speak about like your.
Your future. Your future self. I love
that you mentioned that because I feel
like sometimes when we're in a situation
and we're feeling a certain way and
we're just like, you know, we don't,
we don't know what to do or
how we're going to get there. But
it's usually like as people, we think
in pictures, right? We're, we're visual people,
(44:49):
we think in pictures. So if I
said to you dog, like you're going
to picture a dog, whether you have
your own or one that, you know,
I would picture mine. So when we
think about our future selves, when we
think about the vision that we have
for our life, you know, what we
want for ourselves, how we want to
feel, where we want to live, the
experiences that we want to have, and
coming from those experiences, that's like the
(45:11):
greatest way to manifest things because we
may not know exactly how things are
going to happen, but you have that
vision, you know what you want, you
know what you desire. So it's beautiful
that you mentioned, you know, just like
thinking about your future self because I
think we all should think about, you
know, our future selves, the life that
we want to live with or without
(45:32):
a partner, where we want to live,
you know, the. How we want to
serve in the world, all the things
and work from that when we're in
a place of feeling stuck. So I
think that's. That was great.
Kathryne Mejias (45:46):
Yeah. I'm just being truthful. Right. Because
you have to look at yourself and
celebrate yourself and all your wins and
that's something that we, we may see
as bad. And I'm like, no, actually
I'm pretty proud of myself and I'm
good.
Makini Smith (46:03):
Yes. And as you should be.
Kathryne Mejias (46:06):
Yeah. That comes from being around my
friend Lulu. It really does. So she's
taught me that.
Makini Smith (46:13):
Can't wait to meet her. So before
we go to the final segment of
the show, I would love if you
could tell the listeners where they could
stay connected with you, where they can
learn more you and about you, where
they can purchase your books, etc.
Kathryne Mejias (46:27):
Sure. So they can find me on
Instagram, which is my Catherine Mejias, and
they can also find me on my
website, which is born-four-more.com and they can
book a call. So 15 minutes call
with me to see if we are
good to work together. Or they can
(46:48):
come to my soulful divorce event in
about a week and a half on
March 29, meet me in person, come
hang out, meet other amazing women. And
tickets are available on Eventbrite.
Makini Smith (46:59):
Awesome. So I will have all of
your contact details in the details section
below the episode so they don't have
to search too far.
Kathryne Mejias (47:08):
Perfect. And the book can pre order
it on my website as well.
Makini Smith (47:12):
Awesome. Okay, so for the final segment
of the show, it's kind of like
a rapid fire. You can answer one
word, one sentence. I feel like sometimes
I ask questions at. You may feel
that you want to unpack further and
you're more than welcome to do so.
Kathryne Mejias (47:26):
Okay, I'm ready. I feel like I'm
on a game show or something.
Makini Smith (47:32):
Okay, let's start with if you could
have a gigantic billboard anywhere in the
world, what would it say and why?
Kathryne Mejias (47:42):
I had one, I was on a
billboard, but it didn't say anything. It
was my picture. If I could have
a billboard, it was say, born for
more. Access your full potential, regardless of
fear.
Makini Smith (47:59):
Love it. Love it. Okay, what is
one piece of advice that you wish
you had received when you were navigating
your own transition?
Kathryne Mejias (48:09):
Do not listen to anyone who has
not done it. Because people are constantly
giving advice, but they didn't do it.
So I'm like, how does that help?
So take advice from the people who
have walked the path.
Makini Smith (48:21):
Absolutely. I love it. I second that.
I strongly believe, like, I don't take
advice from people that I wouldn't want
to switch places with. So, yeah, I
agree. Okay. What new belief, behavior or
habit has improved your life in the
last five years?
Kathryne Mejias (48:39):
Ooh, that would be, I think, discipline.
Well, I'm, I'm disciplined, but the discipline
has become a more focused discipline on
my goals and my dreams because, you
know, it's easily to get sidetracked and
go out with the girlfriends and do
this. But what is your long term
plan? And is doing those small things
(49:00):
derailing you from the life that you
want to live? And for myself, it's
been, I'm very focused and disciplined on
my own goals. And because I am,
my son now is learning from that
and is also doing the same.
Makini Smith (49:14):
So I love it. Listen, I love
it. I, as a mom, I strongly
believe some things are taught, some things
are caught. So no matter what you
say, your kids are watching what you
do and they're learning from that.
Kathryne Mejias (49:25):
Yeah.
Makini Smith (49:28):
Okay. So how has motherhood changed you?
Kathryne Mejias (49:31):
Who motherhood has? Well, first of all,
I, I tell my son, I'm like,
I don't know what I'm doing. So
I hope I'm doing a good job.
And we have these conversations on how
can I improve. Right. So again, using
all the tools and experiences. And I
want him to have a good experience
as well. Right. So better communication and
(49:54):
more awareness to again, taking responsibility for
things where I may have fallen short.
And then Redirecting my energy into making
myself a better version of myself every
day.
Makini Smith (50:08):
Love it. Okay, what's one thing that
people often get wrong about you?
Kathryne Mejias (50:13):
Ooh, that. That. Yeah, that's a good
question. People, they think I'm. Okay, first
of all, they think I'm, like, so
tall. They think I'm 59 and I'm
5 5, and they think I'm. I'm
not shy. Like, I'm an extrovert, which
is not the case. So those are
(50:35):
two things on the top of my
head. I'm tall and I'm an extrovert.
Makini Smith (50:40):
I get it. I completely get. Like,
I'm looking at you now, and I
probably would have guessed you're a lot
taller. I'm five three. So people assume
when they see me, like, on pictures,
on Social, that I'm tall and they
meet me, they're like, oh, you're so
tiny. So I get it. And then
people assume when you have, you know,
an online personality or a personal brand
that you're extroverted. And that doesn't have
(51:01):
to be the case. So I. I
love that we're, I guess, breaking the
stigma and showing people what else is
possible.
Kathryne Mejias (51:09):
We are shorter and introverts.
Makini Smith (51:11):
Yes. Short, introverted divorcees.
Kathryne Mejias (51:15):
Yeah, exactly.
Makini Smith (51:17):
Exactly.
Kathryne Mejias (51:17):
Living our best life.
Makini Smith (51:19):
Absolutely. Yes. Thank you so much, Katherine,
for sharing your story and your expertise
with us today. I truly do appreciate
you taking the time to join us.
You could be anywhere in the world,
but you have chosen to be today,
and I truly appreciate it.
Kathryne Mejias (51:35):
Thank you so much. It was such
a pleasure. Thank you.
Makini Smith (51:39):
That's a wrap for today's episode. If
you're looking for inspiration on overcoming challenges
with grace, check out A Walk on
My Stilettos, how to get through the
Struggle with Grace, my book, available on
Amazon or@mckinneysmith.com it's my personal journey and
it's your roadmap to resilience. I want
to thank each and every one of
(52:00):
you that continues to listen each week
to help the show rank globally in
the top 1.5% of podcasts out there.
If today's episode resonated with you, please
subscribe, rate the show, and leave us
a review on Apple Podcast. I want
you to think of one person that
would benefit from today's conversation with Katherine.
(52:23):
Share this episode with them. Someone out
there needs this testimony. Screenshot this episode
and you can tag us on Instagram.
You can Tag katherine@catherinemejias. That's K A
T H R Y N E M
e I J A S. You can
tag myself Hereal McKinney Smith. And let's
(52:45):
keep this conversation going. A healthy community
is a healing community, and a healing
community is full of hope. So let's
continue to heal her.
I'm Makini Smith. After going through a
divorce, my sister passing away, experiencing narcissistic
abuse and some significant health scares, I
realized through sharing my story that I
wasn't alone in my suffering. Suffering, subjective
distress generated by the experience of being
out of balance in a deep dive
to holistically heal mind, body and soul
(00:22):
is where I discovered peace, clarity and
connection. It is impossible to be truly
wise without some real life hardship and
we cannot develop post traumatic wisdom without
making it through and most importantly, through
it together. Social connection builds resilience and
resilience helps create post traumatic wisdom. And
(00:45):
that wisdom leads to hope. Hope for
you and others, witnessing and participating in
your healing and hope for your community.
A healthy community is a healing community
and a healing community is full of
hope because it has seen its own
people weather, survive and thrive. Have you
(01:23):
ever faced struggles that made you question
your strength? In my first book, A
Walk in My Stilettos, how to get
through the Struggle with Grace, I share
my personal journey through adversity, teen motherhood,
divorce and loss, showing you how to
navigate life's toughest seasons with grace. This
book isn't just my story, it's my
roadmap to resilience. So grab your copy
(01:46):
today and start walking in your own
power. Available now on Amazon or mckinney
smith.com Today's guest is Catherine Mejias. She
is the trailblazing founder of Born for
More, a platform redefining how women navigate
life's transitions, especially divorce. As a visionary
(02:08):
event creator, author and energy specialist and
intuitive coach, she's dedicated to turning life's
toughest moments into into opportunities for empowerment
and reinvention. Katherine views divorce not as
an ending, but as a chance to
realign with one's true self, rebuild confidence,
and create a new chapter in life
(02:30):
that feels authentic and fulfilling. Through her
coaching, dynamic events and highly anticipated book,
the Soulful Divorcee, Katherine is inspiring women
to embrace their power and rediscover their
worth. Born for More isn't just a
brand, it's a movement, a community where
(02:50):
women can reclaim their edge, reconnect with
their passions and step boldly into their
next chapter. So please welcome to the
show Katherine Mejias.
Kathryne Mejias (03:03):
Thank you so much Makini for this
beautiful opportunity with you today.
Makini Smith (03:08):
Thank you so much for agreeing to
come on and share your story and
your expertise and your wisdom with us
today. I know that there are many
women that are listening around the globe
that will completely resonate not only with
your story, but the gems that you
are about to Share. So I'm excited
to jump right in.
Kathryne Mejias (03:27):
Me as well.
Makini Smith (03:28):
Where should we start? So I. I
love to start the show with an
Iceberger question, because I feel like as.
As people, you know, we've been conditioned
with our belief systems from, you know,
our. Our childhood, from our parents, from
our environments that we grew up in,
from the experiences that we've. We've had
in life. So before we get to
where you are presently, I would love
(03:50):
to know what was Catherine like as
a young girl and who or what
did she want to be?
Kathryne Mejias (03:57):
Well, Catherine, myself, as a young girl,
I was so shy. I was and
still am a big introvert. Introvert and
very unique. And I've always tried to
fit into the mold. You know, whether
that was to join the popular crowd
or just have friends or even when
(04:20):
it came to jobs, I always felt
the need to bend myself into what
was kind of. I thought was accept.
Yeah. Acceptable and not honor my authentic
self and my uniqueness. And today, I
am so different. I am all about,
you know, my authentic self, and I.
(04:40):
I celebrate that.
Makini Smith (04:41):
I love it. Listen, I'm a fellow
introvert. I get it. Love it.
Kathryne Mejias (04:46):
How did we end up on a
podcast? I don't know. Somehow.
Makini Smith (04:51):
Honestly, I believe that, like, okay, again,
with conditioning. Like, we've been conditioned to
believe that introverts only have, you know,
one way of being or that, you
know, we, like, yes, we are shy,
but as introverts, it's really about how
we recharge. Right? Like, we need alone
time to recharge, where extroverts need to
(05:12):
be around people to, you know, gain
their energy. So there's so much people
don't understand about introverts, but we won't
even go there right now.
Kathryne Mejias (05:20):
That's a whole other podcast.
Makini Smith (05:22):
Exactly. Exactly. Okay, so let's catch us
up to speed. Give us the. The
Coles Notes version of how you got
to where you are today.
Kathryne Mejias (05:33):
So I'll try and condense it. So
being an introvert, I tried to fit
in and for work, I really always
enjoyed traveling. So I didn't know what
to do with my life. And my
mom's like, well, you know, you love
traveling. Why don't you become a flight
attendant? So I tried it out, and
(05:54):
I made it to become a flight
attendant. All the training, I worked for
Air Canada for several years, and that
actually helped me on my journey because,
again, being shy and an introvert, I
was forced to connect and communicate with
people, do all the PA announcements, do
all the things. And at that time,
(06:14):
that Was, you know, really stepping out
of my comfort zone. So I did
that. And that really allowed me to
explore different parts of the world and
take courses from the best teachers when
it came to my passion, which was
everything to do with the unseen, the
metaphysical, the crystal, therapy, energy, healing, you
(06:35):
name it. I've, you know, went, took
a plane somewhere and took a course,
and. And so that was a beautiful
time in my life, but it never
really felt like what I was meant
to do. I always felt like I
was meant to do something more, but
I didn't know what that more was.
And working for Air Canada also allowed
(06:57):
me to take time off and work
in the fashion industry. So I styled
and dressed women from all walks of
life, and that was awesome. That was
such a beautiful experience. But again, it
wasn't like what I was meant to
do. I just felt this. This potential,
this untapped potential within me. And I
(07:17):
knew it had to do with the
unseen and diving into mindset, reset, and
healing, but I didn't completely grasp what
it was. And during that time, I
also got married. I had a beautiful
son, Luca. And during, I think it
(07:40):
was my birthday, December 3rd, where I
decided to take my side hustle at
the time, which was Reiki and healing
and, you know, working with people one
on one. But it was kind of
a side thing. I decided to incorporate
my company, Born for More, because I
wanted to expand on that, and that
(08:03):
was basically kind of where it stemmed
from. The name Born for More was
for me feeling like I was meant
for something more, but never really having
that more until I discovered the more
that I was searching for was beneath
all those limiting beliefs that I had.
So by releasing that, my life started
(08:23):
to look more like that more I
was searching for.
Makini Smith (08:28):
I love it. I love it. Okay,
so you often speak about turning life's
toughest moments into opportunities for empowerment. What
was your personal turning point that led
you to this transformation?
Kathryne Mejias (08:45):
So I've had many transformations throughout my
life. I have, as we mentioned before,
the recording different tattoos during the different
to celebrate the transformations. But the when
it came to my Born for More
company, it was one day where I
decided, I'm like, am I going to
live my life like this, or am
(09:07):
I going to connect to that potential
within me and access that more? However,
if I wanted to access that more,
was I willing to release everything that
didn't align with the more? And that
was something that a lot of people
face. And some people, you know, they
stay where they are, and I didn't
want to be that Person that woke
(09:28):
up at 80 or 90 thinking, what
if I did do a change? What
would my life look like? And so
there was a lot of fear that
came with the more with accessing them
more. But I'm just, you know, that
person that says, yes, there is fear,
but what lies beyond the fear and
(09:49):
fear is just the edge of the
breakthrough. Right. So I decided to go
with the, you know, the accessing that
potential within me. And that was when
I decided to leave my, my ex
husband and which was a huge kind
of, it's a huge rebirth in a
(10:11):
sense because you go from, you know,
accepting the decision that you make and
then you don't realize like, you know,
that there's going to be a roller
coaster with that, but you don't know
to what extent until you're in it.
And so there's the highs, you know,
(10:31):
woohoo, I'm free. And then the oh
my God, what am I doing? I
didn't.
Makini Smith (10:37):
Completely relate, you know, like I mentioned
before we started recording, like I got
divorced in 2009, so it's been quite
the journey. So I can relate to
like everything you're saying. And I guess
what I'm, I'm thinking about the, the
listeners and the women that are listening
right now. Even if they're not going
through like a divorce, but even if
(10:59):
they're going through a breakup with someone
who, they're common law or anything like
that, there is that, that fear, that
fear of the unknown, that fear of,
you know, what does this mean for
my life next? What, you know, who
am I? You know, without this idea
of what I had, the future that
I have with this person, you know,
stepping out of your comfort zone, all
those things. I would love if we
can unpack that some more. For the
(11:21):
listeners that are listening that are maybe
even afraid to leave or you know,
divorce their partners even though they're unhappy.
Kathryne Mejias (11:29):
Absolutely. So it doesn't only happen with
divorce and breakup, it also happens with
jobs and friends. Right. Like sometimes you're
friends with someone and you have that
history, but you just don't align anymore
and there, it doesn't fill you up
like it used to and there's that
guilt, right? Oh, am I going to
hurt that person? So with the, the
(11:50):
ex husband or your partner, oh, am
I going to hurt that person? And
so it's always putting the other person
first and then suppressing ourselves and our
own desires and knowing what will benefit
us. We kind of put that aside
and so it's reevaluating ourselves, our Desires
(12:10):
and why we're doing the things we
want. And then also to build that
relationship with the self, right? Become our
best friend. And coming out of a
marriage for myself and a lot of
the women I work with, we have
neglected ourselves. And therefore, what does that
do? Our self worth is gone. So
(12:31):
we come out of relationships, we have
no self worth. And it's all about
rebuilding that from the inside out by
taking the time we need, not being
hard on ourselves. You know, I'm big
on looking at myself in the mirror
and telling myself like, yeah, you got
(12:51):
this. You know, I. I'm just. I'm
just a funny person in the mirror.
Like, my son looks at me, he
thinks I'm funny, he just joins in,
but I'm like, yeah, you got this.
You're worth it. And it's this constant
coaching ourselves, right? Because that's the way
it is. We gotta do it on.
(13:12):
On time. When these limiting beliefs come,
we gotta connect to them in the
time and space that they happen in
order to reframe our thinking and redirect
our energy.
Makini Smith (13:26):
Absolutely. You know, I agree with you
with, like, you know, whether it be
friends or jobs or a breakup, it's.
It's a form of grief, right? We're
grieving the life that we imagined that
we would have with this other person.
And even if the relationship wasn't toxic,
there's still a sense of reevaluating self,
(13:47):
you know, that. That whole reflection of,
okay, well, what does this mean for
me? Who am I now? You know,
how. How do the things like my.
My future view of my life? What
does that look like for me now?
Like, all of those questions that we,
you know, now ask ourselves after divorce.
Can I ask, like, how long were
you married for?
Kathryne Mejias (14:07):
Okay, so here's the thing. I am
a stat, okay? Because the stats from
Google say the average age of divorce
is between 41 and 43, which I
was 41 and a half. The average
length of divorce of marriage is eight
years. I was married eight years. And
(14:30):
most of the time, 70% of the
time, women are the ones to initiate
it. And so I fall into those
stats. But here's even something more interesting,
is that my wedding date was August
8, 2015, which is 888. And for
those who follow the astrology, it's the
Lionsgate portal. So, 888. Eight years. Date
(14:53):
of separation, August 8th.
Makini Smith (14:57):
Wow. Wow. Wow.
Kathryne Mejias (15:01):
Yeah. Isn't that wild? And, yeah, like,
it just happened. Right? So.
Makini Smith (15:06):
Wow. Wow. Well, I. I even love
that you shared those stats Cause I,
I definitely didn't. Didn't know that, like,
you know, you hear stats of, like,
you know, 50% of marriages end a
divorce. You know, the. I guess the
typical stats that we hear. But thank
you for sharing those stats about length
of marriage and, and age even, because
now I'm. I'm like, thinking about myself
and I was like, well, I was
with my ex husband for eight and
(15:27):
a half years. Oh, there you go.
And I'm thinking, I'm like, I. We
got divorced when I was 39. Okay.
Yeah, I. I can't remember, but, yeah,
somewhere around then. But, yeah. Good to
know.
Kathryne Mejias (15:43):
Those dads, I think when women hit
their 40s, right, there's this whole reevaluation
of the self. And sometimes it coincides
with perimenopause, all the hormonal shifts. Sometimes
it doesn't. It's just like reevaluating where
you are in your life and deciding,
hey, do I want to continue like
this or not? And that's kind of
(16:04):
like in your 40s where you do
that. You know, you have. You're at
that point. So I think that's why
it happens.
Makini Smith (16:11):
Yeah. Wow. And now I'm thinking, I'm
like, hold on. I'm trying to remember
how old I was when I got
the divorce, but anyways, not important. So
for. For many people, divorce can feel
like an ending. How do you shift
your perspective so that you see it
as a beginning?
Kathryne Mejias (16:31):
Like, I. Yeah, so it's a new
beginning because you have no idea where
your life is going. Like, it's all
a new adventure. And for myself and
a lot of the women I work
with, you know, there's some kind of
clear path. Okay, I got married. I
have, you know, a child. I have
(16:51):
my career, and you know exactly where
you're going. And then when divorce happens,
which can be like a surprise or
you can feel it coming, but it's
a redirect. And I always say it's.
It's a gift from the universe because
you can turn lemons into margaritas, right?
You can celebrate. You can celebrate the
(17:11):
new adventure that you're on. And not
everything has to be so controlled and
so calculated. And when you leave space
to step out of what you think
was, that leaves so much room for
expansion, for. For meeting new people, for
living in a place that you may
not have thought, and for pursuing dreams
that you never had the ability to.
(17:33):
To create. Right? And a lot of
women coming out of marriages, they start
their business and they become so successful
because all the. This Energy is now
put into their passion. And when you
are living in alignment doing your passion,
things just have a way of expanding.
Makini Smith (17:51):
Mm. I'm a living example of that.
I filed for my divorce and became
an entrepreneur at the same time. I,
you know, had three kids, a mortgage,
a dog. But that passion to create
this new life, it's a lot. I've
been a full time entrepreneur for 15
(18:11):
and a half years now. Oh, wow.
Kathryne Mejias (18:14):
Yeah, that happened, right? And it's like
a sense of freedom. A new sense
of freedom. And congratulations to you.
Makini Smith (18:21):
Thank you. Thank you. So, okay, tell
us about your new book, the Soulful
Divorcee. What can readers expect from this
book and what impact do you hope
that it has or that it leaves
with them?
Kathryne Mejias (18:36):
So, okay, so this is going to
be my second book. It's launching in
a few months, so hopefully by May
or June. And my first book was
called Soulful Beauty. And that one was
a bit about my story and finding
the inner beauty. Because a lot of
people, they look at themselves in the
mirror, they criticize, they, you know, do
(18:57):
all the things. And I'm like, no.
Women, ladies, beautiful beings. You have to
tap into your inner self, right, and
find that inner beauty. And that book
was written in three weeks. It was
basically, you know, I woke up one
morning and my inner guidance is like,
okay, you're writing a book. And I'm
like, all right, I've never done this
(19:18):
before, but do it. So it kind
of flowed through me. And then I
put it aside, and then, because I
didn't know what to do with it,
and until someone is like, you gotta
get this out. So then I, all
of a sudden, I connected with an
editor and got the ball rolling on
that. And after I finished that, I
(19:39):
said, I am never going through that
again. Right. You get it. Editing is
so brutal.
Makini Smith (19:49):
It's. Oh, my God.
Kathryne Mejias (19:53):
And then when I left my husband,
I just started to journal. So I
journaled and journaled. And then after so
many pages, my inner guidance again is
like, oh, this is going to be
a book. And I'm like, oh, wonderful.
So not, you know, I just went
with it, right, because I. I kind
(20:15):
of released the resistance and. And just
flowed with it. And so what people
can expect is part of it is
my journey. And I offer tools that
I have used throughout my exploration and
my journey. And it also consists of,
you know, the. The dating experiences that
I had, because that was like a
(20:35):
whole wild ride in itself. I mean,
you know, you. You kiss someone for
the first time after being with someone
for so long. And it just is
like a teenager. I had all these
feelings and then. But then there's the
next day, you know, I was crying
because I'm like, oh, my God. I'm,
you know, my old life. And. And
(20:56):
it's kind of all these emotions that
I want women to know that they're
not alone in this and never know
exactly what you can expect when you're
going through such a transformation. But it.
It. I'm not a unique story. I'm
just a woman who has shared her
thoughts, who is. Wants to inspire women
(21:17):
into connecting with their vision and make
things happen, take action on that. Because
life is so short.
Makini Smith (21:26):
I love that. And I love that
you chose to share your experiences of,
like, the roller coaster of emotions that
we deal with after divorce. Because, you
know, we. We see it all the
time, whether it be social media or,
you know, any other place where sometimes
someone is going through or has gone
through a divorce, but they get stuck
in that. That space. You know, they
(21:46):
don't want to date. They think that,
you know, all people of the opposite
sex are now evil, and they have
all these negative, I guess, filters of
the world. Right. But you sharing. Okay,
yeah, It's a roller coaster of emotions.
These are. These are normal feelings. These
are things that we go through. These
are, you know, people don't feel like
they're alone, but also where you talk
(22:09):
about, like, rediscovering self, because I think
especially if you're in an unhealthy relationship,
the focus is on the other person
and the children and all the things
that they want you to do, and
you kind of lose yourself. You know,
all the things, the vision that you
may have had for your life, you
know, may have disappeared, but being able
(22:30):
to now tap back into that and
understand who we are and, you know,
the. The purpose on our life is
not just to be a wife or
just to be a mom or any
of those things. So I. I love
it.
Kathryne Mejias (22:45):
And it's also the dating journey. I
used it in order to bring it
back to myself and see what kind
of people I am attracting. Right. And
that'll tell you if you have shifted
or not, and if you haven't, what
is triggering you again, bringing it back
to yourself and seeing what you need
to work on in order to move
(23:07):
past and not end up in the
exact same relationship you just left. So
I use it really as a fun
experience in order to see, like, oh,
I'm still attracting that type of guy.
I need to shift. Right? So, yeah.
And then it Works. So I, I
wouldn't recommend, honestly jumping in right away
into a serious relationship. I would just
(23:29):
recommend to go have fun and explore
and get to know yourself again.
Makini Smith (23:34):
Yes, I totally agree with you. I
think it's important for us to have
a true understanding of who we are.
I think a lot of people, we
spend so much time focusing on other
people, whether it be our partners or
our family or whoever, but we don't
spend that much time getting to know
ourselves. And just like you, I utilized
my, My divorce as a chance to
(23:55):
get to know me, what my likes
were, what made me tick, what you
know, I didn't like, you know, how,
how I reacted to things, what triggered
me, what didn't trigger me. So get
us getting to know ourselves the same
way how, you know, we would, you
know, our, our best friend or, you
know, someone that we're dating, whatever. We
can recognize their voice when we hear
it or recognize them from, you know,
(24:16):
across the room at the back of
their head. Many of us don't take
that time to get to know ourselves
in that same way. But the more
that we get to know ourselves, the
better understanding we have of other people.
Kathryne Mejias (24:26):
Definitely. And you know what, Makini? I
think people don't take the time to
do that because it's work that you
cannot see. And it's like, oh, but
am I doing anything? So people think
it's a waste of time and you
can't really see it until you know
you've done it. And then waiting a
while because there's always some kind of
(24:46):
delay between the inner self and when
that gets manifested on the outer self.
And it's in that delay that people
start doubting. So I think that's why,
or a big reason why people don't.
Don't do it. They're like, it's, it's
not doing anything, but it really is.
And I'm.
Makini Smith (25:04):
And I also love that you utilize
dating as like a, I don't want
to say a qualitative research to, like,
understand yourself more. Right. Because I, I
think that it's also not as common
for us to look at our history
of type of people that we've dated
to understand ourselves. I think it's very
(25:26):
common for someone to be like, yeah,
well, you know, all of my exes
were toxic or what have you. But
not looking at our contribution or our
accountability. I know after my divorce, I
looked at some of the, you know,
longer relationships that I had, and I
think it was my son who actually
said it to me first. And it
was years ago, so he was probably
in elementary school at the time. And
(25:47):
he's like, you attract narcissist. So I
was like, ouch. I had to do
my research, and then I started, you
know, therapy and understanding, like, narcissists, people
with narcissistic personality disorder, they're attracted to
empaths. Like, so now, okay, am I
setting proper boundaries now? You know, looking
(26:08):
at characteristic types and all these things
and understanding healthy relationships, understanding red flags,
understanding all of these things that I
didn't know before, but through dating, getting
to see a pattern. So now that
I can shift that. So now I'm
presently in a healthy relationship, engaged and
getting married.
Kathryne Mejias (26:27):
Wow. Congratulations. See, that's a shift. You
know, you've done the inner work, right.
And there's kind of the. The validation
for you.
Makini Smith (26:34):
Yeah, it's wild. I'm just thinking about
how you've utilized your experiences. I guess,
like I said before, just to understand
yourself on a deeper level. Right. It's
the reflection of looking back at, you
know, our connections with other people, because
they say that that can be, you
know, a mirror of us or things
(26:56):
within us that we haven't healed if,
you know, depending on our upbringing and
all of those things. So it's. It's
great for the women that are listening
to understand that shifting their perspective on
how they view these breakups and the
actions that they take after can be
so beneficial.
Kathryne Mejias (27:16):
Well, I have a master's in unhealthy
relationships. So I have been through, like,
to be totally transparent, every kind of
toxic relationship you could imagine, and I
didn't get it. I'm like, why am
I attracting these, you know, abusive, mentally,
physically, like, you name it, it, I've
been there. And that's why I can
in, like, pinpoint in someone their vibration,
(27:40):
because I know what it is. Right?
Makini Smith (27:42):
Yeah.
Kathryne Mejias (27:42):
And so I used it. I used
it. I'm like, okay, well, I took
responsibility because it may not be, like,
my fault that I'm in a situation,
but it's my responsibility to shift it
and get myself out of it and
shift my life. And that's where a
lot of women, they feel like victims
and they just. Just don't take ownership.
(28:04):
I'm like, no, change it. Let's take
action and do something about it. And
so I use relationships to learn more
about myself. But in fact, I use
every day as a learning experience because
every day is a manifestation of my
current vibration. So if, you know, I
go to the grocery store and someone's
(28:25):
rude, and I take it personally, I'm
like, okay, well, what is it in
me today? How can I up level
myself? Because I think when you're in
a state of complete alignment, everything no
longer affects you the way it did.
You know, you're at the center of
your life and nothing can affect you.
And that's what alignment means to me.
Makini Smith (28:47):
Yeah. And I love that you also
mentioned that, because I feel like it's
very easy for someone to play the
victim and say, well, all these bad
things are happening to me, you know,
I'm the victim. Woe is me. But
when we understand how things work, when
we understand how energy and spirit works,
when we understand how vibration works, then
we can understand what we're actually broadcasting,
(29:09):
what frequency we're tuning into. And instead
of like, okay, you know, bad situation
after bad situation after bad situation and
saying, ugh, like why, why is this
happening to me? Okay, well, what thoughts
are you thinking? What feelings are you
feeling? And now what, what actions are
you taking? What's the reaction to that?
Like us understanding how we contribute to
(29:31):
these or how we attract these because
we're like magnets.
Kathryne Mejias (29:34):
Exactly. And then using it to our
advantage. Right. It's great to, to know.
But then you gotta dig into it
and do all the work that no
one sees.
Makini Smith (29:43):
Absolutely.
Kathryne Mejias (29:44):
You're not lazy. When you're on your
sofa, you're like processing and getting into
yourself and. Yes.
Makini Smith (29:52):
So, okay, how do you guide women
who are struggling with self worth and
confidence after their, their separation or divorce?
Kathryne Mejias (30:02):
So I really help them again to
get connected to themselves. And a lot
of these women are in a state
of panic and anxiety that comes up
when you're doing all this shifting. So
which anxiety it goes, it makes you
go into your head and then you,
you know, you're all in there. Help
them get into their body by focusing
(30:24):
on the five senses, which is a
super easy way you can do anywhere
you are, go through your five senses.
And that's like your GPS in time
and space. And that will automatically bring
you into the present moment, into your
body. And then locate where in your
body is this tension? You know, if
you are feeling anxious, where is it?
(30:45):
And just bringing attention and awareness to
it. So bringing yourself back into your
body and being comfortable with it, because
I've noticed myself and the clients I
work with that when we are, we
have low self worth, we step out
of our body because we don't even
want to be in it. Right. And
(31:06):
I know what it feels like. I,
I hated myself at one point in
my life. And I know exactly what
I did. I just didn't want to
be in here. And I accepted and
settled things that I would never accept
today. And so let's bring ourselves back
to our body and watch our talk,
like, be hyper aware of what we
(31:28):
tell ourselves and rewrite our story in
the moment it happens again. The mirror
work. You know, celebrate yourself. Look at
your reflection. And at first, when you're
telling yourself, I love you, I'm proud
of you, it's going to feel weird,
right? But now I'm like, you're freaking
awesome. Might not know exactly all the
(31:53):
details, but you're awesome because you're living
on that edge of what you're doing.
And, and it's awesome. So it's all
about, so step one, reconnecting them to
their body and celebrating the smallest things
and doing the mirror work. Those are
just, you know, a few things that
(32:14):
they can do right away.
Makini Smith (32:16):
Absolutely. I, I love all of those
things and I'm, I'm thinking about each
thing that you mentioned. And I remember
when I was going through my divorce
and for probably a couple years after,
I was struggling really bad with fibromyalgia,
so it's like chronic muscle pain. And
they said, like, you know, the, the
(32:37):
symptoms and stuff were depression and anxiety.
And I know doctors like to label
things, especially when they don't fully understand
it. And when I started doing the
actual work, when I started working on
me, my actual, like, healing on a
deeper level, understanding that it wasn't the
fibromyalgia causing the, the aches and the
pains and the anxiety and depression, it
(32:58):
was the anxiety and depression causing the
aches. And they were labeling it as
fibromyalgia. So once I understood that, I
was able to now, like, be present
within my body and understand all the
signs. So that when I started to
feel the dis ease, which, you know,
anxiety is like the body of dis
ease, when I started to feel that,
(33:20):
then I could shift my thoughts and
my feelings, which then eliminated all the
physical symptoms. So it's like, you know,
there are people that have had fibromyalgia
for years and are suffering and in
all this pain. And when I was
able to understand how things actually work
and do the deep work, it was
understanding, once I felt the triggers, once
(33:42):
I felt anxious, any of those, those
things, those sensations within my body, paying
attention to that so that I was
being present so that I could shift
so that I didn't have to deal
with the physical repercussions of that. And
there was Something else you said that
I wanted to unpack, but I'm sure
it'll come to me later.
Kathryne Mejias (33:59):
And you were in your body, right?
So you could actually do the work
from inside out. And that's why it's
so important to bring it back to
yourself, because you can't figure that out
if you're, you know, outside and disconnected.
Makini Smith (34:14):
And I think that that's also a
very great point that you brought up,
because I feel like it's very easy
to want to numb the pain, you
know, whether that be through drugs, alcohol,
sex, I don't know, like, partying, whatever
it is that people use to numb.
But when you are willing to be
present with the emotions, then we can
(34:34):
actually address them and move through them.
It's the suppression of it and the
trying to numb it that causes depression,
because we're trying to pack it all
down. But that energy has to go
somewhere, and it goes within our body,
right? We're feeling it. It comes out.
Kathryne Mejias (34:51):
We gotta transmute it. And an interesting
story. Yesterday, I was feeling quite off.
Like, I woke up on, like, not
feeling right. And I'm always aware of
how I'm feeling, because I want to
transmute and alchemize and release whatever is
going on, because it comes like waves,
right? It's like waves from, you know,
(35:12):
our inner self. So my son. I
taught him how to see auras. And
so I'll ask him. He's seven. I'll
ask him what color I am, right?
So I asked him what color I
am, and he's like, oh, you're. You're
black, and you have yellow, but your
yellow is very small, you know? So
(35:34):
I'm like, well, how can I. So
I. I have fun with him. Like,
well, how can I expand my. My.
The yellow? And he's like, well, it's
gonna take seven days. And I was
actually shocked at what he was going
on.
Makini Smith (35:45):
I'm like, all right, I've taught you
well.
Kathryne Mejias (35:48):
He's like, yeah, it's gonna take you
seven days. You have to. Your heart
is gonna. Is gonna. What, do you
magically make it go away? But you
have to sit with it and. And.
And then your heart's gonna work it.
And I'm like, and how long is
it gonna take? Seven days. Not seven
months, I hope. He's like, yeah, it's
(36:10):
like you're sad. And so my job
now is like, okay, I notice this
energy inside of me. I. I'm not
aware of why I'm sad exactly, but
he could, and it brought awareness to
it. So let me dig into this
and look into it. Right. So that.
That's what happened a few days ago.
(36:31):
I'm still in search, but I feel
a lot better because I. I have
clarity and I have my. My little
guy who's me.
Makini Smith (36:39):
Listen, kid. Kids are way smarter than
we give them credit for. Honestly. There's
so much that we can learn from
them and their transparency and their unfiltered
self.
Kathryne Mejias (36:55):
Well, I got him to do that
because to find out who's lying and
who's not, he's like, how do I
know if this person's lying? I'm like,
well, look at what color they are.
Right. So how does that feel? And
so it kind of started like that
as a game, and now it.
Makini Smith (37:10):
Developed, I think I also think, like,
as introverts. And I don't know if
it's just introverts or also people who.
So I'm also like, hsp, highly sensitive
person. So it's like the. The energy.
And I strongly believe, like, energy, vibration,
spirit, it's all different labels for the
same thing. But it's like our ability
(37:33):
to be in tune with those things.
Like, I can be having a conversation
with someone, and I used to have
a friend who liked to embellish stories
all the time, and I'd be so
into, you know, the conversation, and then
soon as he starts to embellish, it's
like my energy level just, like, drunk.
(37:54):
It's like my intuition is like, I
cannot connect with this. Like, you know,
like, if we. If we. If we
tell ourselves a lie or if we
say a lie or if we say
the truth, it sets off a chemical
reaction within us. Right. So it's the
same if someone else says it. So
if we're in tune, we can feel
that.
Kathryne Mejias (38:12):
Oh, yeah, 100%. And that. That's quite
interesting because that happens to me as
well. And all the time, if someone
is, you know, going on and on,
I just feel myself like, no, it's
shutting down. I'm not. Not interested. I
just want truth. Yeah. And say it.
You know, I don't care if you're
(38:33):
strange, unique, weird. I don't care. You're
living truth. And that's what is important.
Makini Smith (38:39):
Yeah. I think that's why they say,
like, introverts don't do well with small
talk.
Kathryne Mejias (38:44):
It's. It's.
Makini Smith (38:45):
It's like something in us just, like,
shuts down when, you know, we hear
BS or, like, I don't know, like,
shallow conversation or any of those things.
Our energy is like, no, thank you.
Kathryne Mejias (38:57):
Are you a Sagittarius also?
Makini Smith (38:59):
No.
Kathryne Mejias (39:02):
I do that all the time.
Makini Smith (39:04):
Yeah, so true. I think it might
be the introvert energy or something. I
don't know.
Kathryne Mejias (39:11):
I'm the same, like. So.
Makini Smith (39:14):
Okay. Born for More. It's, it's, it's
not just a brand, it's a movement.
What does that movement look like for
you? And where do you see that
growing in the fruit in the future?
Kathryne Mejias (39:27):
So Born for More as a movement,
and it's all about connecting women to
businesses that they need when they're going
through transformation and through divorce or whatever
they need. And that is inner wellness.
Right. So whether that be a fitness
trainer or something that I don't do,
because I'm very big at working with
(39:48):
meditation and frequency, healing and helping women
shift, but I can't, I'm not, you
know, a fitness expert. So if they
want to redefine how they feel their
bodies, then I can connect them to
that. If they want to redo their
look, refresh their looks, then I know
someone who specializes in, in styling them.
(40:09):
Right. And even when they're coming out
of relationships, a lot of them don't
know anything about finances and real estate
because that happened to me. I had
no knowledge about what to do when
it came to my house. So I
have women owned businesses who help other
women when it comes to real estate
and who work specifically with divorced women.
(40:30):
So I didn't know divorce was such
a huge topic until I went through
it. And how many businesses are now
focused specifically on helping this niche, I
guess we can call it, to move
forward, whether that is mortgage or, you
know, maybe they need to refresh their
look or in ourselves. So it's basically
(40:51):
a platform to connect women with businesses.
And then I host large events such
as the upcoming one March 29, that
is has, I think, 46. We're at
46 vendors. We had such a large
amount of people interested. We have a
waiting list now for next year. And
it's all vendors that help women move
(41:13):
forward. And of course, I have the
amazing, inspiring Sophie Gregoire Trudeau, who has
gone through such a public divorce. And
she is an inspiration because she is
a perfect example of someone redefining themselves
in the public eye and reclaiming her
identity on her own. And she's a
yoga teacher and a coach and a
(41:35):
meditation teacher, and she's just an inspiration.
So I'll be having a fireside chat
with her. And what else is a
gift bag? There's drinks, there's photo ops.
It's just A beautiful time. I'm all
about connecting and community. And when we
have the community, we feel stronger together.
(41:55):
And it's not only for divorced women.
Again, everyone knows someone who's gone through
it. So why not support each other
as women and help each other rise?
Makini Smith (42:06):
Love it. Love it. What's been one
of the, I guess, most transformational success
stories from your work with women?
Kathryne Mejias (42:17):
Oh, that's a. That's a tough question.
I. I don't even know how to
answer that.
Makini Smith (42:22):
What's one story that comes to mind
of a woman that you've helped that
has inspired you to keep going?
Kathryne Mejias (42:32):
I think it. It's really. I know
this. I don't want to sound like
egotistical, but I'm really proud of myself
because I. Of where I came from
and who I am now. And I
keep on tapping into the future version
of myself that inspires me to keep
on going. And when I feel low
(42:52):
and down, I connect to that future
version of myself. And she keeps me
going. So I find everyone is so
has their own unique gifts. Another woman
that is. I can't say enough good
things about her is my dear friend
Lulu, who is working with me on
(43:14):
this event. She is my event architect,
and she is such a powerhouse. She
has gone through her own divorce and
she has been a constant woman of
inspiration to me because she has the
ability to see the potential within myself
that I didn't even know existed. And
she. A gift, right? She'll meet with
(43:36):
you and she'll be like, she'll connect
your heart and she'll make you see
that. So I like to surround myself
with positive women who are on the
path of living on their own edge
because that makes me live on my
edge and grow. And it's just like
a ripple effect into. Into the consciousness.
(43:59):
But Lulu, she. We even have the
same birthday. It's like the synchronicities are
crazy, right? And you'll meet her if
you come to the event as well.
Makini Smith (44:09):
So I'm looking forward to meeting her.
And I don't think it's egotistical that
you are proud of your own growth.
We should be, right? Especially if we've
come from. If we've had a lot
of growth, if we've evolved, if we've
been working intentionally on self improvement, I
think it's important to recognize your growth.
(44:29):
And when you speak about like your.
Your future. Your future self. I love
that you mentioned that because I feel
like sometimes when we're in a situation
and we're feeling a certain way and
we're just like, you know, we don't,
we don't know what to do or
how we're going to get there. But
it's usually like as people, we think
in pictures, right? We're, we're visual people,
(44:49):
we think in pictures. So if I
said to you dog, like you're going
to picture a dog, whether you have
your own or one that, you know,
I would picture mine. So when we
think about our future selves, when we
think about the vision that we have
for our life, you know, what we
want for ourselves, how we want to
feel, where we want to live, the
experiences that we want to have, and
coming from those experiences, that's like the
(45:11):
greatest way to manifest things because we
may not know exactly how things are
going to happen, but you have that
vision, you know what you want, you
know what you desire. So it's beautiful
that you mentioned, you know, just like
thinking about your future self because I
think we all should think about, you
know, our future selves, the life that
we want to live with or without
(45:32):
a partner, where we want to live,
you know, the. How we want to
serve in the world, all the things
and work from that when we're in
a place of feeling stuck. So I
think that's. That was great.
Kathryne Mejias (45:46):
Yeah. I'm just being truthful. Right. Because
you have to look at yourself and
celebrate yourself and all your wins and
that's something that we, we may see
as bad. And I'm like, no, actually
I'm pretty proud of myself and I'm
good.
Makini Smith (46:03):
Yes. And as you should be.
Kathryne Mejias (46:06):
Yeah. That comes from being around my
friend Lulu. It really does. So she's
taught me that.
Makini Smith (46:13):
Can't wait to meet her. So before
we go to the final segment of
the show, I would love if you
could tell the listeners where they could
stay connected with you, where they can
learn more you and about you, where
they can purchase your books, etc.
Kathryne Mejias (46:27):
Sure. So they can find me on
Instagram, which is my Catherine Mejias, and
they can also find me on my
website, which is born-four-more.com and they can
book a call. So 15 minutes call
with me to see if we are
good to work together. Or they can
(46:48):
come to my soulful divorce event in
about a week and a half on
March 29, meet me in person, come
hang out, meet other amazing women. And
tickets are available on Eventbrite.
Makini Smith (46:59):
Awesome. So I will have all of
your contact details in the details section
below the episode so they don't have
to search too far.
Kathryne Mejias (47:08):
Perfect. And the book can pre order
it on my website as well.
Makini Smith (47:12):
Awesome. Okay, so for the final segment
of the show, it's kind of like
a rapid fire. You can answer one
word, one sentence. I feel like sometimes
I ask questions at. You may feel
that you want to unpack further and
you're more than welcome to do so.
Kathryne Mejias (47:26):
Okay, I'm ready. I feel like I'm
on a game show or something.
Makini Smith (47:32):
Okay, let's start with if you could
have a gigantic billboard anywhere in the
world, what would it say and why?
Kathryne Mejias (47:42):
I had one, I was on a
billboard, but it didn't say anything. It
was my picture. If I could have
a billboard, it was say, born for
more. Access your full potential, regardless of
fear.
Makini Smith (47:59):
Love it. Love it. Okay, what is
one piece of advice that you wish
you had received when you were navigating
your own transition?
Kathryne Mejias (48:09):
Do not listen to anyone who has
not done it. Because people are constantly
giving advice, but they didn't do it.
So I'm like, how does that help?
So take advice from the people who
have walked the path.
Makini Smith (48:21):
Absolutely. I love it. I second that.
I strongly believe, like, I don't take
advice from people that I wouldn't want
to switch places with. So, yeah, I
agree. Okay. What new belief, behavior or
habit has improved your life in the
last five years?
Kathryne Mejias (48:39):
Ooh, that would be, I think, discipline.
Well, I'm, I'm disciplined, but the discipline
has become a more focused discipline on
my goals and my dreams because, you
know, it's easily to get sidetracked and
go out with the girlfriends and do
this. But what is your long term
plan? And is doing those small things
(49:00):
derailing you from the life that you
want to live? And for myself, it's
been, I'm very focused and disciplined on
my own goals. And because I am,
my son now is learning from that
and is also doing the same.
Makini Smith (49:14):
So I love it. Listen, I love
it. I, as a mom, I strongly
believe some things are taught, some things
are caught. So no matter what you
say, your kids are watching what you
do and they're learning from that.
Kathryne Mejias (49:25):
Yeah.
Makini Smith (49:28):
Okay. So how has motherhood changed you?
Kathryne Mejias (49:31):
Who motherhood has? Well, first of all,
I, I tell my son, I'm like,
I don't know what I'm doing. So
I hope I'm doing a good job.
And we have these conversations on how
can I improve. Right. So again, using
all the tools and experiences. And I
want him to have a good experience
as well. Right. So better communication and
(49:54):
more awareness to again, taking responsibility for
things where I may have fallen short.
And then Redirecting my energy into making
myself a better version of myself every
day.
Makini Smith (50:08):
Love it. Okay, what's one thing that
people often get wrong about you?
Kathryne Mejias (50:13):
Ooh, that. That. Yeah, that's a good
question. People, they think I'm. Okay, first
of all, they think I'm, like, so
tall. They think I'm 59 and I'm
5 5, and they think I'm. I'm
not shy. Like, I'm an extrovert, which
is not the case. So those are
(50:35):
two things on the top of my
head. I'm tall and I'm an extrovert.
Makini Smith (50:40):
I get it. I completely get. Like,
I'm looking at you now, and I
probably would have guessed you're a lot
taller. I'm five three. So people assume
when they see me, like, on pictures,
on Social, that I'm tall and they
meet me, they're like, oh, you're so
tiny. So I get it. And then
people assume when you have, you know,
an online personality or a personal brand
that you're extroverted. And that doesn't have
(51:01):
to be the case. So I. I
love that we're, I guess, breaking the
stigma and showing people what else is
possible.
Kathryne Mejias (51:09):
We are shorter and introverts.
Makini Smith (51:11):
Yes. Short, introverted divorcees.
Kathryne Mejias (51:15):
Yeah, exactly.
Makini Smith (51:17):
Exactly.
Kathryne Mejias (51:17):
Living our best life.
Makini Smith (51:19):
Absolutely. Yes. Thank you so much, Katherine,
for sharing your story and your expertise
with us today. I truly do appreciate
you taking the time to join us.
You could be anywhere in the world,
but you have chosen to be today,
and I truly appreciate it.
Kathryne Mejias (51:35):
Thank you so much. It was such
a pleasure. Thank you.
Makini Smith (51:39):
That's a wrap for today's episode. If
you're looking for inspiration on overcoming challenges
with grace, check out A Walk on
My Stilettos, how to get through the
Struggle with Grace, my book, available on
Amazon or@mckinneysmith.com it's my personal journey and
it's your roadmap to resilience. I want
to thank each and every one of
(52:00):
you that continues to listen each week
to help the show rank globally in
the top 1.5% of podcasts out there.
If today's episode resonated with you, please
subscribe, rate the show, and leave us
a review on Apple Podcast. I want
you to think of one person that
would benefit from today's conversation with Katherine.
(52:23):
Share this episode with them. Someone out
there needs this testimony. Screenshot this episode
and you can tag us on Instagram.
You can Tag katherine@catherinemejias. That's K A
T H R Y N E M
e I J A S. You can
tag myself Hereal McKinney Smith. And let's
(52:45):
keep this conversation going. A healthy community
is a healing community, and a healing
community is full of hope. So let's
continue to heal her.
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