There was a time when Hasbro envisioned a cinematic universe. Battleship was a cog in that misguided wheel, an expensive one at that.
Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately for all us movie goers, Battleship sank before it even hit the seas.
Critics and audiences alike found little joy or interest in a $200 million dollar blockbuster based on a slow-paced board game.
To be fair, they were all correct. Battleship is a slog of a movie; and its nonsensical plot cannot be saved by the bombastic effects and action. Odds are that within minutes, you’ll be sending an SOS to your TV to find something more entertaining.
Now, sit back, arm your tastebuds with a Blind Pirate Blood Orange IPA from Monday Night Brewing, and don't promise any late night snacks if you can't deliver! The Thunderous Wizard, Chumpzilla, and Bling Blake are sinking alien ships and dropping super cool one-liners — mahalo mother f%$&er!
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