End of Days (1999)

Do you remember how the world ended? No? Funny, it was supposed to implode when the clocks switched to the year 2000. Instead, what imploded was our faith in Arnold Schwarzenegger’s ability to carry an R-rated action picture when he signed onboard END OF DAYS! Only Patrick and Gena have the guts to celebrate this movie’s 25th anniversary and attempt to explain what in the living hell is happening here. That means Kill By Kill is digging into the film’s cursed production history, considering Satan’s HR problems, witnessing massive fart fights, visiting Vatican City Orlando, whipping up a “floor pizza” smoothie, and meeting our newest least-favorite character: Bobby Chicago!! All this, plus rattlesnake baptisms, flaming pee, too many scrolls, boiled grandmas, Limp Bizkit-shunting threeways, and a devilishly involved edition of Choose Your Own Deathventure! Never has an apocalypse looked so inviting and made less sense. 

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Artwork by Josh Hollis: joshhollis.com

 

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