May 30, 2024 • 30 mins
What happens when a relentless drive to create meets the harsh realities of fame and ADHD? Join me as I recount a long journey of friendship, personal growth, and the highs and lows of a career in TV production with Ty Pennington. From the chaotic end of "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition" to building a home in Florida, you'll hear how these experiences reshaped his identity and grounded Ty.
Our conversation doesn't shy away from the emotional aspects of life—discussing the paradox of public success and personal loneliness, the bonds with our pets, and the importance of laughter and camaraderie. A severe health scare and the critical support from loved ones highlight the unpredictable twists of life. As we wrap up, we'll hint at exciting future collaborations and adventures, leaving you with warm wishes and a sense of anticipation for what's to come.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 2 (00:00):
we did it, we stuck it.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Okay, let's do it okay.
So how?
Okay?
How long have we known eachother?
I was trying to figure it outwow, you mean in this life?
I don't know I mean like overover a decade.
Well, more than that, no, like15 years.
It's been a while, definitelyover a decade.
Well, more than that.
No, like 15 years.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
It's been a while, definitely over a decade, but
maybe let's call it 12.
Since it's the year of thedragon and it's 12 year cycle,
let's call it 12.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
Wait a minute.
I was with you the last year ofthe dragon, really In 2012?
I'm positive because we were onset.
Extreme, oh you're right?
Speaker 2 (00:43):
I think you were, or it was right after that in New
York, it doesn't matter, whoknows.
Speaker 1 (00:48):
Yeah, but what I have seen is, I feel like you're a
completely different person now.
Would you agree?
Yeah, no, I think that you'resofter.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
No, I definitely am.
Yeah, I mean even the woman whomarried me.
She was like I would not havewanted the man you were and I
was like huh, that's good tohear, but I think she's right, I
know I actually.
Well, here's the thing when youget caught up in the wheel of
TV production and and look,there's one thing about people
(01:20):
blowing smoke at you, butthere's another because I've
never been that kind of personwho believes any of that I'm
like, okay, I'm on a lucky run,let's take advantage of it, but
I know it's all smoke andmirrors.
But, however, when your lifebecomes just this tumbling ball
of, you just really never have aday off like you love it.
But at the same time you'relike what is this thing?
(01:40):
I'm on, you don't.
What happens is you roll awayfrom your original personality.
Because when you're not like infront of a camera, sort of
saying lines to be whateveryou're supposed to be, which is
supposed to be yourself, thoseyears that you used to just hang
around and have fun and laughwith your friends and play
guitar, that's who you are andthe longer you're away from that
(02:03):
, do start to to sort of likesort of glide away from the
person you actually were or orare and you get caught up in
this, this, this title and thisname of oh, that's that guy,
right?
So I think it does.
It does affect you.
I'm sure everybody who's everhad a a moment of fame goes
through that.
But what is lovely about mylittle trajectory is that I've
(02:25):
had a chance to be away fromthat for a while and just sort
of become me again, because like, we have to do that.
Like people don't know that Iwrite songs and I, you know, I I
write poetry or what I mean.
I just that's not what I.
No one cares to know that and Idon't care to share it with
anyone because they don't needto know.
But like I think you have to dothat and you have to laugh with
(02:47):
your mom, who's you know,becoming a senile and wearing
diapers, and you're right behindher and you're like, yes, let's
get this campaign together,which, yes, I'm going for it,
but anyway.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
But wait.
So but you were saying like you, after extreme.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
I feel like you took some time off.
Well, no, here, what here soextreme ended and immediately I
was thrown into uh oh, the talkshow the talk show, which was
really a cluster, because theydidn't really know what they
wanted it to be.
and whenever you're in asituation where somebody doesn't
know what they want it to be,it never goes well, because
(03:26):
they're like, oh, is it aself-help or is you know topics
of the day?
And it was this kind of thingthat we had to film, as if it
wasn't the day we were filming,so we couldn't talk about
anything that was current, whichI'm like that really narrows it
anyway.
But I had a lot of fun and wehad some laugh and I I got to
work with um Tim Gunn, who waslike so much fun to make laugh,
(03:47):
because when he laughs he justlets go of all his, you know,
reserved tenseness and he justbursts out in laughter.
It's the most wonderful thingto see him, just just, you know,
enjoy, like laughter, but he'ssuch a great guy.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
Okay.
So then after that I feel likebefore HGTV you were sort of
taking a break from all of thisfor a while, yeah, yeah, yeah,
no, I, I, I was still living inCalifornia, but I started.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
I decided you know what maybe I do need to sort of
get back to I'd been away from,like everybody I knew from
Atlanta my family, all of thatand so I was like, well, maybe I
do take on a project and I wasable to work out a deal where I
was going to build a housebecause I found some property in
Florida and then I started justbuilding this house and
designing this house while I wasin California that I was going
(04:34):
to have built while I was inFlorida, which made it very
challenging.
So I went back and forth quite abit, but then I built this
beautiful house which I'm in now.
But the point is is like Ifinally had a chance to build my
own home instead of likebuilding this crazy thing in
seven days, you know with withother other teams and volunteers
(04:54):
and builders that can knock itout in a week or two weeks.
Well, they actually did it in aweek.
Of course, this thing took metwo years, but I think it was
important for me to go throughthe process of really going
through what somebody elseactually goes through, instead
of doing it on a TV show.
So I mean, it turned out to bepretty incredible because I was
so meticulous about, like, whichdirection the wood was going to
(05:15):
run, like where the sun wasgoing to be during this part of
the day and where all the above,like I really sort of pulled
off a Taliesin, if you will, ifyou study for any good right my
own sort of creating.
But and it was great and I loveit and I thank God I got it
right, because you have to lookat it every single day and
that's when you realize howimportant it is to get every
(05:36):
single detail.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
So during that time you're building your own
sanctuary and I know that youand I both agree about your home
says a lot about your mentalhealth and just how happy you
can be.
You even wrote a book about it.
So do you feel like you neededto take that time off to sort of
ground back into who you are,what you said, that you've lost
throughout those years of beingon all the shows?
Speaker 2 (06:00):
I don't know if I ever think too deeply about what
I needed.
Let's face it, I've neverthought about what I needed,
which is painfully obviously inmy, in my personality.
But I think, you know, I thinkthe universe works in your favor
a lot of the time, and it's andit's because, look, I, I am
only happy which I think a lotof people are that way is when
(06:23):
you're in a project, and it'sbecause it's, and sometimes it's
just the, the beginning stagesof that project, which is, you
know, the Eureka moment, theideas, that's the euphoria.
That's when you're like, oh, myGod, I just had, I just flipped
the, the, the direction of howshe go, and it's going to be
completely different, and like,then you're like, you're
ecstatic by the thought of it.
Then there's the.
You know, the more the theprocess gets, you know, a little
(06:46):
bit more dragged down into howit's done, but it's, it's the,
it's going through it.
That that's the thrill, youknow.
That's why I think I can't bestagnant, I can't, like, do
nothing.
It's even though I did see ashrink in New York one time and
explained my life and like, oh,I just moved from here and I'm
going to be here for like threeor whatever I think it depends
(07:07):
on how the show works out, orwhatever.
And the guy goes have you everthought about doing nothing?
And I go, wow, no, I haven't.
Of course he's you know, he'sgot all these Zen Buddhists in
his office and he's like youshould look into doing nothing.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
At some point I was like, huh, Okay, I'll put that
on the list, but yeah, I think Ithink that's impossible for you
, because you've also been veryvocal about struggling with ADHD
, and so I don't even know ifyou would have to force yourself
to stop.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Well, I don't think, I don't know if that's healthy.
Okay, like I'm.
I'm.
You know my mom is retired andthis is a woman who used to
write novels.
She used to like dodissertations on Aphrodite.
You know she used to do thesedance troupes with females.
They go you know these jerksand just to watch you know her
sort of just like, sometimesstare at the television, watch
reruns, like it.
(07:56):
Just it makes me sad inside,like I don't want to go down, I
don't want to do nothing and soso.
But I do want to change gearsand like, maybe take a month and
write some songs and see if I Icould actually have the talent
to write a decent song.
It hasn't happened yet, but mypoint is like, maybe there is
(08:16):
like it's just weird, both mydads were musicians, so you
think I could at least like like, okay, that, okay, that is a
keeper.
But anyway, other people havedifferent opinions.
I'm, it's like, it's like anartist, right, the only time we
like our work is if it lookslike somebody else's work and
then you're like ah, that's whatI'm talking about.
But if you think it's garbage,that's the stuff other people
(08:37):
like, they're like no, I lovethat, it's so ugly, it's perfect
, getting back to the work, andwhat made you during this time
of you're creating this space?
Speaker 1 (08:49):
you were getting back to creating music, but what
made you get really back into TV?
Because you came back in likefully.
You have like a million showson HGTV now.
But what made you?
What happened during thatcomeback?
That comeback or I mean, Idon't want to call it a comeback
right In LL Cool J, but likeokay, this is so funny because
(09:11):
it's so funny Cause I had to doTamra Hall.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Yeah, well, the producers called and they're
like, hey, we want to do, wewant you to be on our show, it's
about.
It's about like getting yourlife back on track.
And I was like, okay, I waslike I mean You're like who's
the guest?
But yeah, yeah, I'm like who'sthe guest.
And they're like, well, youknow, you've just been through
so much and like you know, butyou have, I have.
(09:35):
But here's the thing whatpeople don't realize is I
actually never stopped working,so like okay, working, so like
okay.
So after the talk show in newyork, yeah, tell me, so well, I
was living in new york, so I wasloving life in new york, you
know.
And then from there I was doingsort of this man on the street
show with I don't know if he wascnn, but it was, uh, something
(09:56):
else where I was literally sortof just a man about town doing
sort of different talentedcolleges, talking about america,
talking about the differentthings happening there.
I also did a show with Emerilcalled what's on the Menu, and
it was with TNT.
It was a great show.
I mean, we had like San Diegowe had all these big restaurant
chains and like it was great.
It's basically the beginning ofall those food challenge shows.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
But because it was on TNT.
It didn't resonate becausenobody goes to.
Speaker 2 (10:21):
TNT to watch a food show.
They go to food network but Ijust got to be really good
friends with Emeril and it was agreat show.
But then what else happened?
I'm like God I did.
Then I did this diner showwhere we're redoing diners all
across.
So when people are thinkinglike I was just sitting like
like Luke Skywalker on someIsland in the middle of thinking
about like what has happened inmy life, I would still like I
thinking about like what hashappened in my life.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
I would still like, I know, I know that you were
still working.
I know you were still working,but you were pretty vocal about
it.
A few years ago.
I was on social media, likewhen, yeah, but you were
vulnerable about about thecompany.
You were vulnerable abouthaving a low, a little bit.
Well, here's why.
(11:05):
Here's why Tell me, becausehere's why I'm asking.
I think there's a lot of peoplewho are listening, who are in
their own lulls and they feellike they're too old, they've
too seen, not seen, don't knowanyone.
No, you know all the things.
So what?
What went through your mind toallow you yourself to to feel
like like you still, you know,wanted to get out there and show
more of Ty.
Speaker 2 (11:24):
Okay, so here's the truth, all right.
So when you are on a show likefirst of all and Trade Spaces
was an amazing show because wegot to just have fun in people's
houses, like they were like, ohmy God, there's a carnival
party that's coming to ourneighborhood.
We're going to switch with ourfamilies, we're going to laugh
hysterically for three and ahalf days and someone's going to
end up in the living room, thatsucks, but I don't care because
(11:46):
it's going to be so much fun.
Right, and that that wasamazing.
But Extreme was a different show.
It it was like it just grewinto this, like really
incredible, real emotionaljourney, and like it didn't
start out that way.
But because of thepersonalities that were on the
show, including myself, youstarted having these really deep
conversations with people who'dbeen through a lot of stuff,
and so you realize that, like,what we do as artists and
(12:08):
designers like really can changesomeone's life, it can turn the
page and just really givepeople what they can't do for
themselves.
And that's when you realizethat design really is something
that's important to us as a soul, because clutter, not only in
real life but also inside you,it just blocks all ability to be
(12:32):
happy and so having people inthrow everything out and build
you like a brand new somethingand yes, we don't throw it away,
we actually put it in storagebecause I would lose my, my shit
too.
They'd like what.
Yeah, anyway, coming off of ashow, that was the stop hitting
the table I'm gonna come and putyour.
I'm gonna tie your hands behindyour back I'll put something
(12:52):
that makes so much noise righthere.
So like extreme, which was likethe Mount Everest of home
design shows, because not onlydid we do something that cannot
even be done again, which isbuilding a house in seven days,
but more importantly, we reallychanged people's lives and you
felt like you really didsomething, like you had real
(13:13):
worth, because because you sawthe reaction in their faces.
So after doing that, just doinga show where you're flipping a
house and making a profit,you're saying, well, I got more
money for mine than yours.
It just didn't seem to be thesame caliber of of satisfaction
and so I was like, well, I mean,I enjoy being on television,
(13:35):
but like, if there's a greatshow, that's like a lot of fun
to do, that I'll do, but I alsolove just creating TV.
So, yes, I said yes to a coupleof shows that were were smaller
, but it was just one of thosethings where I honestly knew
that I had to go dormant.
Because how can you go fromlike this, yeah, to then do a
(13:55):
show that's like this, just belike just some time, just like
it's like creating the bestalbum ever and then coming out
with like you know, oh.
But then we also made thisalbum.
You know, it's like just let itlie, like be as good as your
last work was like, and just letit realize you don't, you don't
have to continue at that pace,like it's okay to just like know
(14:20):
that you, you, you really hit ahigh level, a watermark that
you should be so proud of, buteverything else is down here and
you got to get back to justbeing okay with.
Okay.
Now you can just be talent, youcan just be a host and you can
just do shows that arecompetitive, but you can use
your personality and your justbe a host and you can just do
shows that are competitive, butyou can use your personality and
your voice and still have somuch fun that the people you're
(14:41):
working with are now gettingthat same joy that we used to
get from doing the show onextreme.
Because you become a familywhen you work with these tv
shows, as you know.
But, yeah, I had to sort of getaway from it so that I I became
happy again.
Here's what happens when youwork every single day, every
(15:01):
single day Like I think I had 10days off from the holidays at
Christmas you get disconnectedfrom everything that's living in
your life, your plants, yourpets and whoever's waiting for
you at home.
And when you lose all of that,you become the loneliest human
on the planet and you look forlike love and all the wrong
places and you get just reallylost in life.
(15:22):
And I think, Is that whathappened to you?
I think a little bit.
I think I, you know I I couldbe the most popular person you
know on the street, but also theloneliest version.
It's like like Tom Petty wrotesongs about that, where it's
like, yeah, so excited, you guysgot to see me, but I have to go
and get on a bus and, you know,go to the next town.
(15:42):
And that's literally what mylife was like too.
Like you, just, you madeconnections but then they had to
be like short lived and so youwould start just sort of like
vying for attention because youjust you didn't really have it
in the way that you wanted it,you just had it in a mass, you
know, in a mass viewing, right.
You became actually reallylonely and so that's why it was
(16:03):
so important to like laugh andtake trips with friends whenever
you did get a break, because,like I'm, I just love the sound
of laughter.
It's the best healingmedication there is.
Laughter is the best, and so,yeah, I think sometimes, when
you do have great success in onething, you have to like
sometimes wait for that nextwave to come in.
You can't just jump to anotherwave and besides, let's face it,
(16:26):
I got really lucky.
You don't get, first of all,lightning strikes, usually only
one time.
For me, it's like struck liketwo and a half to three times,
and that's very rare intelevision that 15 minutes turns
into 15 to 20 years.
I mean that's yeah, and so Imean I think what it is, though,
is it happened to me later inlife that I actually did have
(16:49):
the skills and sort of theconfidence in myself to be in
front of the camera Also, likewhen I really did need to make
something with my hands.
I knew how to do it because I'vebeen doing it my whole life.
So I wasn't a con, becausethat's the thing that most
people are afraid of.
They're like, oh God, peopleare going to see that I'm
actually.
You know not who I said I was.
Especially in this day and ageof social media, when you're who
(17:11):
you are, then the best part isis you should come further in.
Like I wish people saw what Idid behind the secret door.
You know what kind of rooms Iactually made, but nobody else
knew because we didn't know it.
Like it wasn't part of the showbecause it was a secret.
And so it's crazy because, likeI was doing so much stuff
behind the scenes but you neversaw any of that and I'm like
(17:33):
we're missing great content.
Speaker 1 (17:36):
But yeah, so I did see.
I mean I was.
I I still am so impressed withthe level of like.
You're an actual artist and Idon't think that anybody know
sees that your life.
But but going back to your lifechanging like obviously getting
getting married, huge, hugeshift in your life and you
(17:57):
getting sick last year.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
Yeah, which I think is connected.
No, I'm kidding.
No, it is Kelly that is not true, thank God.
Thank God someone loves me.
Because I was like so I can'tbreathe.
So, yeah, the craziest thingwas happening.
I went to the Barbie premiereout in LA and you know, I'm
walking the red carpet trying tolook as cool as I can.
(18:22):
And then I went to dinner withKelly that night at the proper
downtown and like every time Iswallowed I was like what is
going on?
It was like like swallowingrazor blades.
My throat had been hurting likefor a while, like almost a
month, and been really dry.
And so the funny thing is she'slike well, you know, if you
cover your mouth when you sleep,maybe it wouldn't be such a
problem.
(18:42):
You're like what?
I'm like, yeah, let me just tapemy mouth shut.
Some people do that, yeah, butthat wasn't the issue and it's
never been the issue.
Right, I was like that's why Iwas like, oh yeah, it was just
me breathing.
But no, a friend of mine had adaughter who had gone to camp
and came back and had this weirdlike bandage on her neck or
(19:05):
whatever, and I didn't thinkanything about it.
And she's putting her hands onyou know this lemonade and sugar
and then hands me a drink and Ihave no idea that it's just
camp covered in germs and I'm,you know, I'm drinking it down.
But something happened.
It got behind my, my tonsilsand all the above and there's,
there's this abscess that'shappening I had no idea was
getting worse every day.
So I go to sleep, I'm about toget up and shoot this show, uh,
(19:27):
battle on the mountain and allof a sudden, like I could hear
wind, like when I'm trying tobreathe, I I heard it like
closing up like this, and I waslike, oh my God, I have to go.
So like three in the morning Igot up and I drove to this
hospital and said, hey, man,y'all need to give me a shot of
(19:48):
something that's going to.
You know, I'm having anallergic reaction or something.
And they're like, okay, well,can we take a look at it?
Maybe it's not that.
I'm like I don't know what elseit would be.
I think you should, you know,give me the shot if you can.
And so, anyway, they took somepictures and put me in this
thing to get an idea of what washappening.
And then this doctor was like,hey, so look, we got to send you
(20:09):
down to Denver and I go, we'rein Breckenridge, you don't have
what we need right now.
And he goes.
No, here's the thing.
I'm going to shove a tube downyour throat and he goes.
But to do that, the only thingI can do is like, what if I make
an incision?
But it goes very wrong?
Your artery is right there andif that happens, you're going to
(20:29):
bleed out in less than fiveminutes.
And I was like god and I waslike, hey, can I pee before I go
?
And he goes.
I think I think you're good, Ithink let's just get to the
difference.
So, anyway, next thing, I knowI wake up and, like you know,
they've cut into my throat andall nine yards.
But it was much worse than Ithought like people are like
(20:50):
messaging me, saying, oh my god,my brother died of that.
Like you know, like you justdon't realize it can just happen
that it closes up.
I'm like you know you die orit's an infection that just goes
so bad that you die from it andso they cut it out.
But I'm like what in the hellwas all of that?
Speaker 1 (21:08):
Well, that's what my, that's my question to you.
What in the hell was all that?
Like?
What do you think the reasonwas for that?
And have you and be honest,like, have you really did?
Did that change you in a way?
Or did you?
Have you changed the way thatyou look at your body or respect
your body, or no?
It's just.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
No, yeah, no, absolutely no.
Well, first of all, the otherthing about me is people still
think what's so funny?
Like you know, I had some badpress at one point and let me
tell you one bit of bad presslasts a long time, not about
like, oh, this guy has helped somany families in the world.
It's like you know.
Oh, this guy partied one night.
Guess what he's like you know.
(21:46):
It's like you know png had mynews.
But what people don't realizeis I don't even, I don't even
drink anymore, I just it's.
It's not that like, I won't,like on the holidays or whatever
, cause I love wine, but I justdon't.
I don't party anymore.
Like I don't get out of controlto the point that I'm like you
know just belligerent, it justhits different.
Speaker 1 (22:06):
Now it hits yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
Well, it's not the sad, it's just not fun, because
like I'm fun for 35 minutes butthen I'm like out of commission
for two days and I'm like that'sjust not who I want to be.
No, but no I mean, dude, I like,I, I'm very.
I play all kinds of sports andI work out and like look, I'm,
I'm not like a spry chickenanymore either.
(22:28):
So just the fact that I'm doingthat, it's crazy.
What is crazy is, like how myfriends are looking that are my
age.
I'm like what the hell is goingon?
You've got to like people, gotto just put down the vices.
Man, you can't smoke and drinkit.
Just you turn into, like it'scalled, oxidation.
People look at an apple, justshave it and leave it on the
counter and then realize whataging actually does.
Speaker 1 (22:50):
Ty, you do.
You do look amazing for yourage.
I was having a conversationwith somebody yesterday about us
in the podcast and I mentionedthat you're going to be 60 next
year, right?
Oh, you had to say it.
Speaker 2 (23:05):
Yes, yeah, no, like I'm going to be like 60 in like
a couple of like in the fall.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
So that's okay, well, if it like, sometimes I tell
people.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
I'm way older than I am, just so I can hear them say
I look great, I'm like I'm 57.
Speaker 1 (23:28):
I'm 80.
Yeah, I just think you look,we're fun Every time we work
together.
It is I'm, I'm, you're like mypunching bag.
We make fun of each otherconstantly and we have a good
time.
But I've also seen you evolvein such a an amazing way that I
do feel like you are just Idon't know, like you just seem
softer, you seem more authentic,you seem more vulnerable, you
(23:49):
seem more comfortable in yourskin.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
Yeah, yeah, I mean, here's what it is.
I stopped trying to prove thatI'm amazing, like I just
realized, like, okay, nobody sawthe cool things I was doing in
my secret room, but you knowwhat I did?
Them People that work with meknow, like I, I, you just get to
a point.
It's it's sort of like whatcool is is when you stop trying
(24:13):
to prove that you are cool, orwhen you stop trying to prove
that you are cool, or when youstop trying to prove that you
have a gift or a talent.
Then you realize, oh, that'swhy you're gifted is, you don't
have to prove it.
And I yeah, I think it's a longtime for us like look, when
we're young, we're like, look atme, look at me look at me, you
know.
And then eventually you know,luckily for me, I got so much
(24:34):
attention and I was like, wow,that's a lot.
Everyone sees what you know.
So then you're like, but thennobody really sees you like who
you, your authentic self.
They just see like theirversion of you.
Like this guy is, you know,just a dude who you know is a
hunky handyman or whatever.
But nobody knew like the layersof like what I can do, whether
(24:55):
it's right, but it doesn'tmatter like I don't have to
prove that to anyone becauseI've lived it like and I think
that's what it is.
It's it's funny.
It's like if you read the books, like sit hard to all the above
they talk about, like it's thepath, it's the journey, that is
like the lesson.
It's like you have to gothrough it all to finally get to
the point you're like oh right,you and you can't go back and
(25:18):
like have a conversation withyourself because you know
yourself doesn't want to hear it.
They're like hey look old man,that's cool, that's great.
But look I, I gotta shred, Igotta go.
Speaker 1 (25:27):
So you keep talking and I'm gonna keep walking, but
and I mean, I could say the samething in my it.
For me it was different thanthe hunky carpenter.
I was not that, but in HGTV Ifelt like I had to be this
perfect Martha Stewart-likefigure that was, you know,
always standing up straight, andyou know, my hair was always
quaffed and and that's, that'snot really who I am.
(25:49):
You know me like I curse, likea sailor.
I'm really sarcastic, and sodoes your mom, and so does your
mom and so does my mom, but I,you know, once I started not
caring as much as pretending tobe this perfect person which I'm
not.
I feel like people havegravitated more towards me, more
professionally and personally,because I stopped pretending.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
Yeah, I mean, that's it.
You just can't.
You just can't pretend to besomebody else ever, and I've
always tried to be like I mean,look, let's face it, even on TV
most people are like God, you'rejust like you are on television
.
I'm like, well, yeah, I meanbecause there's a camera in my
face and, like you know, I don'tI usually don't do studio shows
(26:30):
.
I'm usually out sweating anddirty like I am in real life and
so, like most of the time, itis who I really am.
But the persona of televisionlike yeah, everyone sort of sees
you as a bigger human beingthan you are.
When, truly, like I thinkthat's the beauty of just
getting to know someone you canfinally let the guard down and
and like even today, like whenI'm talking to somebody on the
(26:53):
phone, I'll raise my voice.
I'm like shouting into thephone, like why, like they can
hear you, like try that.
And the thing with me too islike you just finally get to the
point that you're like you getwise enough that you finally
start to listen to other people,and that's the lesson.
Is that all that time you'vebeen trying to talk and to tell
(27:17):
somebody about what you did andwhat you're doing and blah, blah
, blah, blah blah, akanarcissism.
If you took a moment of silenceand just sort of observe what's
happening in the room and listento other people's stories,
you'd realize that, well,they've got really cool things
going on in their life too, andthat your life isn't any more
important than theirs, and thatyou should just listen for a
(27:40):
change, because they may besaying something that you never
even realized, but when you'reyounger, you're just like me, me
, me, me.
Like let me tell you about, letme tell you about me, let me
tell you, and like it's funny,but it's just it's.
It takes the process of livingthrough life and and and
honestly, like going throughtough, like emotional pain and
all the above and finallyrealizing a lot of things that
(28:02):
your parents weren't greateither.
They had problems like they're,like you can't blame like
everything on other peopleeither.
Like that's right, it's perfect, like nobody's perfect, have to
accept like this is what youwere dealt.
But look at how far you've comewith, like the worst hand ever
given.
You turned, like you know,really old, moldy lemons into
(28:26):
some pretty delicious lemonade.
Speaker 1 (28:27):
I sure did.
I went to this retreat lastyear.
I've talked about on thepodcast a few times, but it
dealt with a lot of likechildhood issues and it was the
first time, ty I'm 47 years old.
It was the first time Irealized how young my parents
were when they had me in theirearly twenties and I'm like
judging them.
Do you know what I was doing inmy early twenties?
(28:48):
You don't want to know.
Speaker 2 (28:51):
Yeah, I mean honestly like what did I do?
What did I do?
Who's got?
It's not on video.
It's not on video, Right, ThankGod.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
Yeah, like listen, ty , I am so thankful for your
friendship.
I'm so grateful that I got towork with you on many well it's
extreme trading spaces andtiebreaker and your show, your
talk show I was on.
So we've been around the blocktogether and I'm so grateful for
your friendship.
I'm so happy.
You seem so happy.
(29:19):
I love Kelly, I love whatyou've, what you're doing, I
love all the shows you're on.
I couldn't be more happy foryou and thank you for for your
time today too.
Speaker 2 (29:27):
And I love my dogs more than anything in the world.
Like how did I never likethat's the thing that's going to
rip my?
Oh, my God.
It's just like why?
Like I've dodged so muchemotional attachment my entire
life, and then these little dogscome in and like, if they ever
pass away, like I'm going to bewrecked.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
We're not going to talk about that.
No, no, yeah, no, because mydog, my dog's 15 and she's been
with me since she was eightweeks old.
Oh my God, yeah, so we're justgoing to not talk about that,
got it.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
Give Kelly my best too.
I will, and hopefully we'll.
We'll either do a projecttogether or we'll just do a trip
, like I have some ideas.
I mean, your friends are myfriends, we should come to
Mexico.
Speaker 1 (30:12):
Tanya's going to be there in July.
Come meet us all.
Right, maybe I will.
That's not a bad idea okay, allright.
Speaker 2 (30:23):
Well, thanks for having me.
I'll see you in Mexico.
we did it, we stuck it.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Okay, let's do it okay.
So how?
Okay?
How long have we known eachother?
I was trying to figure it outwow, you mean in this life?
I don't know I mean like overover a decade.
Well, more than that, no, like15 years.
It's been a while, definitelyover a decade.
Well, more than that.
No, like 15 years.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
It's been a while, definitely over a decade, but
maybe let's call it 12.
Since it's the year of thedragon and it's 12 year cycle,
let's call it 12.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
Wait a minute.
I was with you the last year ofthe dragon, really In 2012?
I'm positive because we were onset.
Extreme, oh you're right?
Speaker 2 (00:43):
I think you were, or it was right after that in New
York, it doesn't matter, whoknows.
Speaker 1 (00:48):
Yeah, but what I have seen is, I feel like you're a
completely different person now.
Would you agree?
Yeah, no, I think that you'resofter.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
No, I definitely am.
Yeah, I mean even the woman whomarried me.
She was like I would not havewanted the man you were and I
was like huh, that's good tohear, but I think she's right, I
know I actually.
Well, here's the thing when youget caught up in the wheel of
TV production and and look,there's one thing about people
(01:20):
blowing smoke at you, butthere's another because I've
never been that kind of personwho believes any of that I'm
like, okay, I'm on a lucky run,let's take advantage of it, but
I know it's all smoke andmirrors.
But, however, when your lifebecomes just this tumbling ball
of, you just really never have aday off like you love it.
But at the same time you'relike what is this thing?
(01:40):
I'm on, you don't.
What happens is you roll awayfrom your original personality.
Because when you're not like infront of a camera, sort of
saying lines to be whateveryou're supposed to be, which is
supposed to be yourself, thoseyears that you used to just hang
around and have fun and laughwith your friends and play
guitar, that's who you are andthe longer you're away from that
(02:03):
, do start to to sort of likesort of glide away from the
person you actually were or orare and you get caught up in
this, this, this title and thisname of oh, that's that guy,
right?
So I think it does.
It does affect you.
I'm sure everybody who's everhad a a moment of fame goes
through that.
But what is lovely about mylittle trajectory is that I've
(02:25):
had a chance to be away fromthat for a while and just sort
of become me again, because like, we have to do that.
Like people don't know that Iwrite songs and I, you know, I I
write poetry or what I mean.
I just that's not what I.
No one cares to know that and Idon't care to share it with
anyone because they don't needto know.
But like I think you have to dothat and you have to laugh with
(02:47):
your mom, who's you know,becoming a senile and wearing
diapers, and you're right behindher and you're like, yes, let's
get this campaign together,which, yes, I'm going for it,
but anyway.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
But wait.
So but you were saying like you, after extreme.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
I feel like you took some time off.
Well, no, here, what here soextreme ended and immediately I
was thrown into uh oh, the talkshow the talk show, which was
really a cluster, because theydidn't really know what they
wanted it to be.
and whenever you're in asituation where somebody doesn't
know what they want it to be,it never goes well, because
(03:26):
they're like, oh, is it aself-help or is you know topics
of the day?
And it was this kind of thingthat we had to film, as if it
wasn't the day we were filming,so we couldn't talk about
anything that was current, whichI'm like that really narrows it
anyway.
But I had a lot of fun and wehad some laugh and I I got to
work with um Tim Gunn, who waslike so much fun to make laugh,
(03:47):
because when he laughs he justlets go of all his, you know,
reserved tenseness and he justbursts out in laughter.
It's the most wonderful thingto see him, just just, you know,
enjoy, like laughter, but he'ssuch a great guy.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
Okay.
So then after that I feel likebefore HGTV you were sort of
taking a break from all of thisfor a while, yeah, yeah, yeah,
no, I, I, I was still living inCalifornia, but I started.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
I decided you know what maybe I do need to sort of
get back to I'd been away from,like everybody I knew from
Atlanta my family, all of thatand so I was like, well, maybe I
do take on a project and I wasable to work out a deal where I
was going to build a housebecause I found some property in
Florida and then I started justbuilding this house and
designing this house while I wasin California that I was going
(04:34):
to have built while I was inFlorida, which made it very
challenging.
So I went back and forth quite abit, but then I built this
beautiful house which I'm in now.
But the point is is like Ifinally had a chance to build my
own home instead of likebuilding this crazy thing in
seven days, you know with withother other teams and volunteers
(04:54):
and builders that can knock itout in a week or two weeks.
Well, they actually did it in aweek.
Of course, this thing took metwo years, but I think it was
important for me to go throughthe process of really going
through what somebody elseactually goes through, instead
of doing it on a TV show.
So I mean, it turned out to bepretty incredible because I was
so meticulous about, like, whichdirection the wood was going to
(05:15):
run, like where the sun wasgoing to be during this part of
the day and where all the above,like I really sort of pulled
off a Taliesin, if you will, ifyou study for any good right my
own sort of creating.
But and it was great and I loveit and I thank God I got it
right, because you have to lookat it every single day and
that's when you realize howimportant it is to get every
(05:36):
single detail.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
So during that time you're building your own
sanctuary and I know that youand I both agree about your home
says a lot about your mentalhealth and just how happy you
can be.
You even wrote a book about it.
So do you feel like you neededto take that time off to sort of
ground back into who you are,what you said, that you've lost
throughout those years of beingon all the shows?
Speaker 2 (06:00):
I don't know if I ever think too deeply about what
I needed.
Let's face it, I've neverthought about what I needed,
which is painfully obviously inmy, in my personality.
But I think, you know, I thinkthe universe works in your favor
a lot of the time, and it's andit's because, look, I, I am
only happy which I think a lotof people are that way is when
(06:23):
you're in a project, and it'sbecause it's, and sometimes it's
just the, the beginning stagesof that project, which is, you
know, the Eureka moment, theideas, that's the euphoria.
That's when you're like, oh, myGod, I just had, I just flipped
the, the, the direction of howshe go, and it's going to be
completely different, and like,then you're like, you're
ecstatic by the thought of it.
Then there's the.
You know, the more the theprocess gets, you know, a little
(06:46):
bit more dragged down into howit's done, but it's, it's the,
it's going through it.
That that's the thrill, youknow.
That's why I think I can't bestagnant, I can't, like, do
nothing.
It's even though I did see ashrink in New York one time and
explained my life and like, oh,I just moved from here and I'm
going to be here for like threeor whatever I think it depends
(07:07):
on how the show works out, orwhatever.
And the guy goes have you everthought about doing nothing?
And I go, wow, no, I haven't.
Of course he's you know, he'sgot all these Zen Buddhists in
his office and he's like youshould look into doing nothing.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
At some point I was like, huh, Okay, I'll put that
on the list, but yeah, I think Ithink that's impossible for you
, because you've also been veryvocal about struggling with ADHD
, and so I don't even know ifyou would have to force yourself
to stop.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Well, I don't think, I don't know if that's healthy.
Okay, like I'm.
I'm.
You know my mom is retired andthis is a woman who used to
write novels.
She used to like dodissertations on Aphrodite.
You know she used to do thesedance troupes with females.
They go you know these jerksand just to watch you know her
sort of just like, sometimesstare at the television, watch
reruns, like it.
(07:56):
Just it makes me sad inside,like I don't want to go down, I
don't want to do nothing and soso.
But I do want to change gearsand like, maybe take a month and
write some songs and see if I Icould actually have the talent
to write a decent song.
It hasn't happened yet, but mypoint is like, maybe there is
(08:16):
like it's just weird, both mydads were musicians, so you
think I could at least like like, okay, that, okay, that is a
keeper.
But anyway, other people havedifferent opinions.
I'm, it's like, it's like anartist, right, the only time we
like our work is if it lookslike somebody else's work and
then you're like ah, that's whatI'm talking about.
But if you think it's garbage,that's the stuff other people
(08:37):
like, they're like no, I lovethat, it's so ugly, it's perfect
, getting back to the work, andwhat made you during this time
of you're creating this space?
Speaker 1 (08:49):
you were getting back to creating music, but what
made you get really back into TV?
Because you came back in likefully.
You have like a million showson HGTV now.
But what made you?
What happened during thatcomeback?
That comeback or I mean, Idon't want to call it a comeback
right In LL Cool J, but likeokay, this is so funny because
(09:11):
it's so funny Cause I had to doTamra Hall.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Yeah, well, the producers called and they're
like, hey, we want to do, wewant you to be on our show, it's
about.
It's about like getting yourlife back on track.
And I was like, okay, I waslike I mean You're like who's
the guest?
But yeah, yeah, I'm like who'sthe guest.
And they're like, well, youknow, you've just been through
so much and like you know, butyou have, I have.
(09:35):
But here's the thing whatpeople don't realize is I
actually never stopped working,so like okay, working, so like
okay.
So after the talk show in newyork, yeah, tell me, so well, I
was living in new york, so I wasloving life in new york, you
know.
And then from there I was doingsort of this man on the street
show with I don't know if he wascnn, but it was, uh, something
(09:56):
else where I was literally sortof just a man about town doing
sort of different talentedcolleges, talking about america,
talking about the differentthings happening there.
I also did a show with Emerilcalled what's on the Menu, and
it was with TNT.
It was a great show.
I mean, we had like San Diegowe had all these big restaurant
chains and like it was great.
It's basically the beginning ofall those food challenge shows.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
But because it was on TNT.
It didn't resonate becausenobody goes to.
Speaker 2 (10:21):
TNT to watch a food show.
They go to food network but Ijust got to be really good
friends with Emeril and it was agreat show.
But then what else happened?
I'm like God I did.
Then I did this diner showwhere we're redoing diners all
across.
So when people are thinkinglike I was just sitting like
like Luke Skywalker on someIsland in the middle of thinking
about like what has happened inmy life, I would still like I
thinking about like what hashappened in my life.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
I would still like, I know, I know that you were
still working.
I know you were still working,but you were pretty vocal about
it.
A few years ago.
I was on social media, likewhen, yeah, but you were
vulnerable about about thecompany.
You were vulnerable abouthaving a low, a little bit.
Well, here's why.
(11:05):
Here's why Tell me, becausehere's why I'm asking.
I think there's a lot of peoplewho are listening, who are in
their own lulls and they feellike they're too old, they've
too seen, not seen, don't knowanyone.
No, you know all the things.
So what?
What went through your mind toallow you yourself to to feel
like like you still, you know,wanted to get out there and show
more of Ty.
Speaker 2 (11:24):
Okay, so here's the truth, all right.
So when you are on a show likefirst of all and Trade Spaces
was an amazing show because wegot to just have fun in people's
houses, like they were like, ohmy God, there's a carnival
party that's coming to ourneighborhood.
We're going to switch with ourfamilies, we're going to laugh
hysterically for three and ahalf days and someone's going to
end up in the living room, thatsucks, but I don't care because
(11:46):
it's going to be so much fun.
Right, and that that wasamazing.
But Extreme was a different show.
It it was like it just grewinto this, like really
incredible, real emotionaljourney, and like it didn't
start out that way.
But because of thepersonalities that were on the
show, including myself, youstarted having these really deep
conversations with people who'dbeen through a lot of stuff,
and so you realize that, like,what we do as artists and
(12:08):
designers like really can changesomeone's life, it can turn the
page and just really givepeople what they can't do for
themselves.
And that's when you realizethat design really is something
that's important to us as a soul, because clutter, not only in
real life but also inside you,it just blocks all ability to be
(12:32):
happy and so having people inthrow everything out and build
you like a brand new somethingand yes, we don't throw it away,
we actually put it in storagebecause I would lose my, my shit
too.
They'd like what.
Yeah, anyway, coming off of ashow, that was the stop hitting
the table I'm gonna come and putyour.
I'm gonna tie your hands behindyour back I'll put something
(12:52):
that makes so much noise righthere.
So like extreme, which was likethe Mount Everest of home
design shows, because not onlydid we do something that cannot
even be done again, which isbuilding a house in seven days,
but more importantly, we reallychanged people's lives and you
felt like you really didsomething, like you had real
(13:13):
worth, because because you sawthe reaction in their faces.
So after doing that, just doinga show where you're flipping a
house and making a profit,you're saying, well, I got more
money for mine than yours.
It just didn't seem to be thesame caliber of of satisfaction
and so I was like, well, I mean,I enjoy being on television,
(13:35):
but like, if there's a greatshow, that's like a lot of fun
to do, that I'll do, but I alsolove just creating TV.
So, yes, I said yes to a coupleof shows that were were smaller
, but it was just one of thosethings where I honestly knew
that I had to go dormant.
Because how can you go fromlike this, yeah, to then do a
(13:55):
show that's like this, just belike just some time, just like
it's like creating the bestalbum ever and then coming out
with like you know, oh.
But then we also made thisalbum.
You know, it's like just let itlie, like be as good as your
last work was like, and just letit realize you don't, you don't
have to continue at that pace,like it's okay to just like know
(14:20):
that you, you, you really hit ahigh level, a watermark that
you should be so proud of, buteverything else is down here and
you got to get back to justbeing okay with.
Okay.
Now you can just be talent, youcan just be a host and you can
just do shows that arecompetitive, but you can use
your personality and your justbe a host and you can just do
shows that are competitive, butyou can use your personality and
your voice and still have somuch fun that the people you're
(14:41):
working with are now gettingthat same joy that we used to
get from doing the show onextreme.
Because you become a familywhen you work with these tv
shows, as you know.
But, yeah, I had to sort of getaway from it so that I I became
happy again.
Here's what happens when youwork every single day, every
(15:01):
single day Like I think I had 10days off from the holidays at
Christmas you get disconnectedfrom everything that's living in
your life, your plants, yourpets and whoever's waiting for
you at home.
And when you lose all of that,you become the loneliest human
on the planet and you look forlike love and all the wrong
places and you get just reallylost in life.
(15:22):
And I think, Is that whathappened to you?
I think a little bit.
I think I, you know I I couldbe the most popular person you
know on the street, but also theloneliest version.
It's like like Tom Petty wrotesongs about that, where it's
like, yeah, so excited, you guysgot to see me, but I have to go
and get on a bus and, you know,go to the next town.
(15:42):
And that's literally what mylife was like too.
Like you, just, you madeconnections but then they had to
be like short lived and so youwould start just sort of like
vying for attention because youjust you didn't really have it
in the way that you wanted it,you just had it in a mass, you
know, in a mass viewing, right.
You became actually reallylonely and so that's why it was
(16:03):
so important to like laugh andtake trips with friends whenever
you did get a break, because,like I'm, I just love the sound
of laughter.
It's the best healingmedication there is.
Laughter is the best, and so,yeah, I think sometimes, when
you do have great success in onething, you have to like
sometimes wait for that nextwave to come in.
You can't just jump to anotherwave and besides, let's face it,
(16:26):
I got really lucky.
You don't get, first of all,lightning strikes, usually only
one time.
For me, it's like struck liketwo and a half to three times,
and that's very rare intelevision that 15 minutes turns
into 15 to 20 years.
I mean that's yeah, and so Imean I think what it is, though,
is it happened to me later inlife that I actually did have
(16:49):
the skills and sort of theconfidence in myself to be in
front of the camera Also, likewhen I really did need to make
something with my hands.
I knew how to do it because I'vebeen doing it my whole life.
So I wasn't a con, becausethat's the thing that most
people are afraid of.
They're like, oh God, peopleare going to see that I'm
actually.
You know not who I said I was.
Especially in this day and ageof social media, when you're who
(17:11):
you are, then the best part isis you should come further in.
Like I wish people saw what Idid behind the secret door.
You know what kind of rooms Iactually made, but nobody else
knew because we didn't know it.
Like it wasn't part of the showbecause it was a secret.
And so it's crazy because, likeI was doing so much stuff
behind the scenes but you neversaw any of that and I'm like
(17:33):
we're missing great content.
Speaker 1 (17:36):
But yeah, so I did see.
I mean I was.
I I still am so impressed withthe level of like.
You're an actual artist and Idon't think that anybody know
sees that your life.
But but going back to your lifechanging like obviously getting
getting married, huge, hugeshift in your life and you
(17:57):
getting sick last year.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
Yeah, which I think is connected.
No, I'm kidding.
No, it is Kelly that is not true, thank God.
Thank God someone loves me.
Because I was like so I can'tbreathe.
So, yeah, the craziest thingwas happening.
I went to the Barbie premiereout in LA and you know, I'm
walking the red carpet trying tolook as cool as I can.
(18:22):
And then I went to dinner withKelly that night at the proper
downtown and like every time Iswallowed I was like what is
going on?
It was like like swallowingrazor blades.
My throat had been hurting likefor a while, like almost a
month, and been really dry.
And so the funny thing is she'slike well, you know, if you
cover your mouth when you sleep,maybe it wouldn't be such a
problem.
(18:42):
You're like what?
I'm like, yeah, let me just tapemy mouth shut.
Some people do that, yeah, butthat wasn't the issue and it's
never been the issue.
Right, I was like that's why Iwas like, oh yeah, it was just
me breathing.
But no, a friend of mine had adaughter who had gone to camp
and came back and had this weirdlike bandage on her neck or
(19:05):
whatever, and I didn't thinkanything about it.
And she's putting her hands onyou know this lemonade and sugar
and then hands me a drink and Ihave no idea that it's just
camp covered in germs and I'm,you know, I'm drinking it down.
But something happened.
It got behind my, my tonsilsand all the above and there's,
there's this abscess that'shappening I had no idea was
getting worse every day.
So I go to sleep, I'm about toget up and shoot this show, uh,
(19:27):
battle on the mountain and allof a sudden, like I could hear
wind, like when I'm trying tobreathe, I I heard it like
closing up like this, and I waslike, oh my God, I have to go.
So like three in the morning Igot up and I drove to this
hospital and said, hey, man,y'all need to give me a shot of
(19:48):
something that's going to.
You know, I'm having anallergic reaction or something.
And they're like, okay, well,can we take a look at it?
Maybe it's not that.
I'm like I don't know what elseit would be.
I think you should, you know,give me the shot if you can.
And so, anyway, they took somepictures and put me in this
thing to get an idea of what washappening.
And then this doctor was like,hey, so look, we got to send you
(20:09):
down to Denver and I go, we'rein Breckenridge, you don't have
what we need right now.
And he goes.
No, here's the thing.
I'm going to shove a tube downyour throat and he goes.
But to do that, the only thingI can do is like, what if I make
an incision?
But it goes very wrong?
Your artery is right there andif that happens, you're going to
(20:29):
bleed out in less than fiveminutes.
And I was like god and I waslike, hey, can I pee before I go
?
And he goes.
I think I think you're good, Ithink let's just get to the
difference.
So, anyway, next thing, I knowI wake up and, like you know,
they've cut into my throat andall nine yards.
But it was much worse than Ithought like people are like
(20:50):
messaging me, saying, oh my god,my brother died of that.
Like you know, like you justdon't realize it can just happen
that it closes up.
I'm like you know you die orit's an infection that just goes
so bad that you die from it andso they cut it out.
But I'm like what in the hellwas all of that?
Speaker 1 (21:08):
Well, that's what my, that's my question to you.
What in the hell was all that?
Like?
What do you think the reasonwas for that?
And have you and be honest,like, have you really did?
Did that change you in a way?
Or did you?
Have you changed the way thatyou look at your body or respect
your body, or no?
It's just.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
No, yeah, no, absolutely no.
Well, first of all, the otherthing about me is people still
think what's so funny?
Like you know, I had some badpress at one point and let me
tell you one bit of bad presslasts a long time, not about
like, oh, this guy has helped somany families in the world.
It's like you know.
Oh, this guy partied one night.
Guess what he's like you know.
(21:46):
It's like you know png had mynews.
But what people don't realizeis I don't even, I don't even
drink anymore, I just it's.
It's not that like, I won't,like on the holidays or whatever
, cause I love wine, but I justdon't.
I don't party anymore.
Like I don't get out of controlto the point that I'm like you
know just belligerent, it justhits different.
Speaker 1 (22:06):
Now it hits yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
Well, it's not the sad, it's just not fun, because
like I'm fun for 35 minutes butthen I'm like out of commission
for two days and I'm like that'sjust not who I want to be.
No, but no I mean, dude, I like,I, I'm very.
I play all kinds of sports andI work out and like look, I'm,
I'm not like a spry chickenanymore either.
(22:28):
So just the fact that I'm doingthat, it's crazy.
What is crazy is, like how myfriends are looking that are my
age.
I'm like what the hell is goingon?
You've got to like people, gotto just put down the vices.
Man, you can't smoke and drinkit.
Just you turn into, like it'scalled, oxidation.
People look at an apple, justshave it and leave it on the
counter and then realize whataging actually does.
Speaker 1 (22:50):
Ty, you do.
You do look amazing for yourage.
I was having a conversationwith somebody yesterday about us
in the podcast and I mentionedthat you're going to be 60 next
year, right?
Oh, you had to say it.
Speaker 2 (23:05):
Yes, yeah, no, like I'm going to be like 60 in like
a couple of like in the fall.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
So that's okay, well, if it like, sometimes I tell
people.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
I'm way older than I am, just so I can hear them say
I look great, I'm like I'm 57.
Speaker 1 (23:28):
I'm 80.
Yeah, I just think you look,we're fun Every time we work
together.
It is I'm, I'm, you're like mypunching bag.
We make fun of each otherconstantly and we have a good
time.
But I've also seen you evolvein such a an amazing way that I
do feel like you are just Idon't know, like you just seem
softer, you seem more authentic,you seem more vulnerable, you
(23:49):
seem more comfortable in yourskin.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
Yeah, yeah, I mean, here's what it is.
I stopped trying to prove thatI'm amazing, like I just
realized, like, okay, nobody sawthe cool things I was doing in
my secret room, but you knowwhat I did?
Them People that work with meknow, like I, I, you just get to
a point.
It's it's sort of like whatcool is is when you stop trying
(24:13):
to prove that you are cool, orwhen you stop trying to prove
that you are cool, or when youstop trying to prove that you
have a gift or a talent.
Then you realize, oh, that'swhy you're gifted is, you don't
have to prove it.
And I yeah, I think it's a longtime for us like look, when
we're young, we're like, look atme, look at me look at me, you
know.
And then eventually you know,luckily for me, I got so much
(24:34):
attention and I was like, wow,that's a lot.
Everyone sees what you know.
So then you're like, but thennobody really sees you like who
you, your authentic self.
They just see like theirversion of you.
Like this guy is, you know,just a dude who you know is a
hunky handyman or whatever.
But nobody knew like the layersof like what I can do, whether
(24:55):
it's right, but it doesn'tmatter like I don't have to
prove that to anyone becauseI've lived it like and I think
that's what it is.
It's it's funny.
It's like if you read the books, like sit hard to all the above
they talk about, like it's thepath, it's the journey, that is
like the lesson.
It's like you have to gothrough it all to finally get to
the point you're like oh right,you and you can't go back and
(25:18):
like have a conversation withyourself because you know
yourself doesn't want to hear it.
They're like hey look old man,that's cool, that's great.
But look I, I gotta shred, Igotta go.
Speaker 1 (25:27):
So you keep talking and I'm gonna keep walking, but
and I mean, I could say the samething in my it.
For me it was different thanthe hunky carpenter.
I was not that, but in HGTV Ifelt like I had to be this
perfect Martha Stewart-likefigure that was, you know,
always standing up straight, andyou know, my hair was always
quaffed and and that's, that'snot really who I am.
(25:49):
You know me like I curse, likea sailor.
I'm really sarcastic, and sodoes your mom, and so does your
mom and so does my mom, but I,you know, once I started not
caring as much as pretending tobe this perfect person which I'm
not.
I feel like people havegravitated more towards me, more
professionally and personally,because I stopped pretending.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
Yeah, I mean, that's it.
You just can't.
You just can't pretend to besomebody else ever, and I've
always tried to be like I mean,look, let's face it, even on TV
most people are like God, you'rejust like you are on television
.
I'm like, well, yeah, I meanbecause there's a camera in my
face and, like you know, I don'tI usually don't do studio shows
(26:30):
.
I'm usually out sweating anddirty like I am in real life and
so, like most of the time, itis who I really am.
But the persona of televisionlike yeah, everyone sort of sees
you as a bigger human beingthan you are.
When, truly, like I thinkthat's the beauty of just
getting to know someone you canfinally let the guard down and
and like even today, like whenI'm talking to somebody on the
(26:53):
phone, I'll raise my voice.
I'm like shouting into thephone, like why, like they can
hear you, like try that.
And the thing with me too islike you just finally get to the
point that you're like you getwise enough that you finally
start to listen to other people,and that's the lesson.
Is that all that time you'vebeen trying to talk and to tell
(27:17):
somebody about what you did andwhat you're doing and blah, blah
, blah, blah blah, akanarcissism.
If you took a moment of silenceand just sort of observe what's
happening in the room and listento other people's stories,
you'd realize that, well,they've got really cool things
going on in their life too, andthat your life isn't any more
important than theirs, and thatyou should just listen for a
(27:40):
change, because they may besaying something that you never
even realized, but when you'reyounger, you're just like me, me
, me, me.
Like let me tell you about, letme tell you about me, let me
tell you, and like it's funny,but it's just it's.
It takes the process of livingthrough life and and and
honestly, like going throughtough, like emotional pain and
all the above and finallyrealizing a lot of things that
(28:02):
your parents weren't greateither.
They had problems like they're,like you can't blame like
everything on other peopleeither.
Like that's right, it's perfect, like nobody's perfect, have to
accept like this is what youwere dealt.
But look at how far you've comewith, like the worst hand ever
given.
You turned, like you know,really old, moldy lemons into
(28:26):
some pretty delicious lemonade.
Speaker 1 (28:27):
I sure did.
I went to this retreat lastyear.
I've talked about on thepodcast a few times, but it
dealt with a lot of likechildhood issues and it was the
first time, ty I'm 47 years old.
It was the first time Irealized how young my parents
were when they had me in theirearly twenties and I'm like
judging them.
Do you know what I was doing inmy early twenties?
(28:48):
You don't want to know.
Speaker 2 (28:51):
Yeah, I mean honestly like what did I do?
What did I do?
Who's got?
It's not on video.
It's not on video, Right, ThankGod.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
Yeah, like listen, ty , I am so thankful for your
friendship.
I'm so grateful that I got towork with you on many well it's
extreme trading spaces andtiebreaker and your show, your
talk show I was on.
So we've been around the blocktogether and I'm so grateful for
your friendship.
I'm so happy.
You seem so happy.
(29:19):
I love Kelly, I love whatyou've, what you're doing, I
love all the shows you're on.
I couldn't be more happy foryou and thank you for for your
time today too.
Speaker 2 (29:27):
And I love my dogs more than anything in the world.
Like how did I never likethat's the thing that's going to
rip my?
Oh, my God.
It's just like why?
Like I've dodged so muchemotional attachment my entire
life, and then these little dogscome in and like, if they ever
pass away, like I'm going to bewrecked.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
We're not going to talk about that.
No, no, yeah, no, because mydog, my dog's 15 and she's been
with me since she was eightweeks old.
Oh my God, yeah, so we're justgoing to not talk about that,
got it.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
Give Kelly my best too.
I will, and hopefully we'll.
We'll either do a projecttogether or we'll just do a trip
, like I have some ideas.
I mean, your friends are myfriends, we should come to
Mexico.
Speaker 1 (30:12):
Tanya's going to be there in July.
Come meet us all.
Right, maybe I will.
That's not a bad idea okay, allright.
Speaker 2 (30:23):
Well, thanks for having me.
I'll see you in Mexico.
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