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April 23, 2025 • 16 mins

Ever wonder why even the most skilled and passionate experts often struggle to sell their services? As a failed rock star turned seven-figure life coach who's trained over 40,000 coaches and entrepreneurs, I've discovered the psychological barriers that prevent genuine connection with potential clients.

The secret lies in what I call "Building a Belief Bridge" - understanding the crucial disconnect that happens when we evolve through our business journey. As we grow, we naturally adopt new vocabulary, perspectives, and values that fundamentally change how we communicate. The problem? We try to speak from our evolved selves to people who haven't undergone the same transformation.

Most marketing advice tells you to make noise and grab attention, but this approach triggers the same response as someone sprinting toward you in a store - people either run away or put up their defenses. Instead, effective messaging focuses relentlessly on your audience's current reality: their desires, frustrations, and the specific day-to-day experiences causing their pain. This is why health coaches discussing "75 superfoods" fail while those who talk about "finally playing with your kids on the playground again" succeed.

The difference between mediocre and magnetic messaging comes down to a simple shift in perspective. Stop asking "What should I say?" and start asking "What are they struggling with today?" When you nail this approach, people experience that magical moment of thinking, "This person is in my head!" - and that's when real connection happens.

Ready to transform your approach to sales and marketing? Dive into this episode to learn how to build your own belief bridge and finally connect with the people who need what you offer most.

If you would like to learn more about working with Josh, and the Performance Coaching Certification, visit JoshCoats.com!

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hi, my name is Josh and I'm your push coach.
I'm a failed rock star turnedseven-figure life coach.
I've trained over 40,000coaches and entrepreneurs since
I got started back in 2014.
I currently run my own lifecoach certification for those
who want to learn the powerfultools of transforming lives
using the psychology of truecoaching.
On this show, we're going toexplore business from a

(00:24):
different perspective.
I combine high energy withpsychology to teach you business
in a totally different way.
If you're tired of being toldto just show up and do the work,
or just believe more or justtrust the compound effect, this
podcast will take you on a deepdive to help you understand what
is actually holding you andyour clients back from doing the

(00:47):
work.
Once you understand thepsychology of performance, we
can build powerful messagingthat will attract the right
people who finally show up anddo the work.
If you're ready to be apowerful leader and build your
legacy, let's dive in.

Speaker 2 (01:04):
So let's dig into some of the sales stuff.
I'm not going to cover as muchof the leadership stuff today
because mostly I teach that inmy six-figure inner circle.
But basically in my membershipI use the push method to coach
people.
I teach a lot of the sales andmarketing stuff that I'm about
to kind of introduce you to.
And then obviously I have alife coach certification where

(01:27):
we teach how to use the coaching.
And then my six figure innercircle is where we bring it all
together.
My six figure inner circle welearn the leadership systems.
We learn next level sales andmarketing skills, like how do we
take this psychology and turnit into like emails and funnels
and recruiting workshops and allof these different things.
And my inner circle also goesthrough my certification to make

(01:50):
sure they get that.
But let's jump into sales andmarketing for a second, because
I want to show you one of myvery, very, very favorite things
why most people who mean welland are wonderful humans
absolutely suck at sales.
Anybody feel that?
How many of you here are like Ilove helping people and I have

(02:12):
something that I know can helpthem.
I know it's amazing.
I know it's incredible but manconvincing people that it's
something they need to do isreal freaking hard.
So let's dig into this.
Okay, I call this building abelief bridge, and this is
technically the broken bridge.
Okay, so what I teach insidethe program is how to piece the

(02:34):
things together that actuallycreate the customer journey that
takes them from where they areto the point of being ready to
actually buy.
Does that make sense?
The questions that convertreally is using questions to
build a bridge for one singularindividual, which is really
freaking powerful and, honestly,a hundred times easier because

(02:57):
you're asking questions.
That is getting that person toopen up and give their exact
steps.
Okay, what is harder isfiguring out how to do that when
it's supposed to be a messageto a hundred people instead of
just one singular person.
So what happens is we've kindof been taught I don't know that

(03:17):
anyone said these exact words,but I think we've kind of been
taught that the point of socialmedia make as much noise as
humanly possible and try to getas many eyeballs as humanly
possible.
Okay, are there elements of that?
Yes, there are, but let's goback to the analogy Josh gave
earlier.
If Josh takes off at a deadsprint running at Kelly in

(03:41):
Target, she is going to have anatural reaction which is to
either punch me in the face orrun away.
Yeah, so what we need to do isunderstand that every single
time we write a post for me,it's also emails Every single
time I'm communicating withanother human, I have the

(04:05):
opportunity to accidentally makethem feel like punching me in
the face or running away.
Okay, making noise is not thebiggest goal, even though I do
want to make some noise.
Okay, making the right noisefor the right person is the goal
.
Really big difference.

(04:27):
Okay, our messaging needs tohave them in mind more than our
products.
Okay, so, really good messagingis about their desires, their
pain, their journey.
It's not about my product atall.
My product is the thing thatsolves the desire they have,

(04:54):
fixes the pain they're dealingwith and gives them the steps
they need to go on that journey.
Does that make sense toeveryone?
Nobody here gives a f*** if mylegacy leadership university is
the best selling membership inthe world.
It's not.
I mean, that'd be a ridiculousclaim to make.
I'm just saying, even if it wasthe best selling membership in

(05:16):
the world, you don't care aboutthat, you care about listen.
I have this problem.
Does it solve this problem.
If so, I don't care what wecall it, I don't care what the
colors are, I don't care whatthe checkout page is like,
because I make five and even$10,000 sales through a checkout
page.
That is the unsexiest thing,michelle, you saw this morning.

(05:37):
It's not sexy at all.
Do you know why?
Because the one-on-oneconversation closed the gap.
I don't need the page to besexy, we already closed the gap.
This is just how she getsaccess to the journey.
Okay, I'm not saying you can'talso have some pretty graphics
and some pretty things, but whatI am saying is, a hundred times

(05:57):
out of a hundred, psychologybeats pretty and fun and sexy.
Now, if you want to also bepretty, fun and sexy, I mean
that will definitely just add tothe effectiveness.
But for me personally, I justdon't give a fuck about that.
I really don't.
My goal solve your problem.
If I can help you solve yourproblem, you don't really care

(06:18):
what it looks like, as long asit gets the job done do a really
, really, really good job ofconstantly and this goes against
everything your brain told youabout sales, because your brain
the second.
I say the word sales.
What is kind of the first wordsthat come to your mind about

(06:40):
what my approach should be likePushy, manipulative.
Let's play with this one.
When it comes to posting onsocial media, okay, for a second
, forget everything I just toldyou.
Okay, when you need to go makea post, like if I was like
everyone, go make a post in thenext five minutes.
Okay, when it comes to posting,what is the kind of natural

(07:05):
idea or energy that comes to you?
What are you going to to figureout what you should be saying?
I think to myself what should Isay?
How can I inspire them?
How can I motivate them?
What features or wins can Ishare about my product?

(07:27):
Now, none of that is wrong,none of it's wrong.
Okay, but it's I, I, I, me.
What do I think I should say?
How can I and I don't mean anyshame, I used to do the same
thing, okay.
It's just that that is thenatural human interaction and
that's why life coaching is sucha powerful tool that I make my

(07:50):
six figure leaders learn,because mentoring is the same
when it comes to mentoringanother individual.
It's not that it's bad, likethere needs to be some mentoring
, right, but remember how I saidit needs, if it's going to be
duplicatable.
It needs to be a method or asystem that is easily customized
.
The customization part needs toall be me asking questions to

(08:13):
you to help you dig in, andthat's what we do inside the
program.
It's like, okay, now that Itaught you this, let's dig in
and find out how that actuallyworks with what you have and
what you do.
Okay, but it's natural humanreaction to go to your own brain
to figure out what you shouldbe saying to someone else, and

(08:33):
what we should be doing isasking what are they struggling
with today?
I like to use this one, too whathave they already tried that
didn't work?
Already tried that didn't work?

(08:54):
What are some specificexperiences they are having in
their day-to-day that arecausing this frustration?
Notice how now I'm veryintentionally pivoting the whole
thing and the reason this is soimportant.
I mean, first of all, it's justbetter communication when I
have the other person in mindinstead of me.
But I also want to show youthis how many of you have been

(09:15):
doing this for more than a year?
Your business, just any type ofbusiness?
Okay, how many of you in that?
And some of you have been doingit for five years, 10 years
beyond.
How many of you in that timehave grown on a personal level?
From all of the trainingsyou've done, the books you've
read, all the things you've doneDuring that growth phase, you

(09:38):
have some new vocabulary, wordsand some new values that you
have adopted in your life.
The reason most of us suck atsales is because we have become
a totally new person and we tryto explain from this new person
to the old person why theyshould do what we want them to

(10:01):
do.
Does that make sense?
I'll give an example.
I worked with one health andfitness company and they were
absolutely obsessed with talkingabout their superfood smoothies
.
Obsessed with it.
Okay, nothing wrong with it,it's good, I've used it for a
while.
But they would be like oursuperfood smoothie has 75

(10:23):
superfoods, it's whole food andtastes like chocolate.
Now, the last part was okay, Ithink that's totally fine.
Okay, but nobody woke up thismorning going.
You know what would reallysolve my problems If I could
just find a way to get 75superfoods into my meals.

(10:45):
Today, nobody actually cares.
And so the clients that I workedwith.
I taught them how to go do alot of customer research and
find out.
Hey, the people that you'retrying to sell to.
What are their actual biggestfrustrations?
Because I promise you it's nothow many superfoods they got in
their diet.
What are their actualfrustrations?
What are the problems theyactually want to solve?

(11:09):
And the reality is, especiallyin the health and wellness world
, a lot most, and really inevery world.
Let's just be honest.
If we're dealing with humans,99% of the conscious level
problems they are dealing withthat they are looking for
solutions to are shallow.
They are.
If I put out an ad that waslike become a better person by

(11:32):
the end of the week, it wouldcost me like $100 a lead.
But if I'm like make threesales by the end of the week, I
can get leads for like two or $3.
Why?
Because we, our conscious levelbrain, is looking for a
tangible solution to our problem.
We're not looking for how togrow so that we can feel better
about life and have a betterpositive perspective.

(11:53):
Now, if you're on this, youmight be doing that because
you've done enough personalgrowth to have new values right.
So what we tend to do is wetend to mature beyond the
shallow things and then try toforce that maturity on other
people who aren't ready for itBecause, I promise you, none of

(12:14):
them damn fitness coaches joinedthe company.
They joined to try to get 75superfoods in their diet.
They all joined because theywere dealing with, you know,
struggling to lose weight.
Okay, which?
The struggling to lose weight?
If we go deeper, is becausethey, you know, like, what does
struggling with losing weight doto your day-to-day situation,

(12:36):
right?
So I taught them how to dig in,find out, like okay, when
someone says I want to lose moreweight, let's ask why, okay,
like okay, it sounds like youhave a goal and that's amazing.
Do you mind me asking why is itthat you do want to lose weight
?
What will this actually affectin your life?
And as people give thoseanswers, that becomes our best

(12:57):
content for social media.
So, for instance, if we havefive different people say, well,
honestly, if I could loseweight, I could finally play on
the playground with the kidsagain, okay.
If five people say that I needto go make a lot of posts about
that, because that's theconscious level thing that they

(13:20):
currently care about.
They don't care about 75superfoods.
But if your process will givethem the ability to play on the
playground with the kids and yousay that drinking.
Your 75 superfoods will do thatfor them.
They're in.
So we don't sell people on theproduct, we sell them on the

(13:41):
process that they want, thejourney they want to go on the
end destination, if you will.
So we point to the currentpains that they have, we agitate
those and we remind them of thething they actually give up
about, which is getting thistype of tangible result.
And we agitate that over andover and over and over, and

(14:05):
that's how you eventually becomethe life coach who helps
network marketers go top 10 intheir company.
That is so damn specific.
How the hell did I become thatI'm a life coach?
I've never even done networkmarketing before.
Do you know how?
Because I found that networkmarketers were the ones that

(14:27):
clicked on most of my ads andgot on most of my calls.
And then I just customized whatI do sales marketing, mindset
and leadership to the painpoints that network marketers
have, and sometimes those arethe exact same pain points that
realtors and life insurance andcourse creators also have.

(14:51):
So they find their way into myfunnel.
But the reality is I'm notsaying to anyone this would be
the worst ad ever and no onewould have clicked on it.
Learn my belief bridge.
The hell is that and why shouldI care?
Nobody cares.
Nobody cares that I have abelief bridge, nobody cares.
I need to talk to yoursituation first and then, if I'm

(15:14):
the guy who can fix that foryou, you will listen to whatever
process I have that fixes that,and when I get really, really
good at this, you're still goingto have some posts that only
get four likes.
Okay, the difference is yourlikes mean a lot more when you
created an actual interactionwith someone that made this.

(15:38):
This is what I'm going for allthe time.
Every presentation I do, everyad that I write, every funnel
that I build, I want people toread, write, listen.
I want them to hear my messageand go oh my God, this dude is
in my head.
If I can get that response, Iknow we're good, because that

(15:59):
means I created the connectionof where you're actually at and
where you want to go to what Ihave to offer.
Okay, friends, thanks forhanging out with me today.
I appreciate it so much.
Please, please, please, makesure you clock out.
Go enjoy some sun.
It's raining here, damn it.
Go enjoy whatever you havegoing on.

(16:20):
Go make some memories.
Go have some fun Unplugrecharge.
I love you.
Have an amazing day.
Hope to see you guys around.
Bye, friends.
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