Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Order was a fresh show. It's Kiki's court, It's all rights,
the honorable Kikiliko. Okay, take it away, judge. Oh yeah,
your honor.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
With my new gavel, I'm gonna go ahead and hit
that boom. Let's get into this case, it says, Hey, Kiki,
I know I may get judged harshly, but I'm hoping
that there are people out there that can give insight
on what I'm going through. My childhood best friend had
a baby by my husband. I made the choice to
stick with my husband and work out our marriage, and
although it happened six years ago, I am still dealing
(00:33):
with the repercussions of his mistake. After I found out
about the affair, my ex best friend moved away and
we hadn't heard from her for the last six years,
no communication at all, until last month, when she popped
up on my doorstep and asked my husband and I
to take custody of the child. Her reason she was
battling a sobriety issue and could no longer care for
(00:54):
their son. So my husband quickly agreed, and the boy
has been living with us for the last month. However,
I never wanted children, and I especially never wanted to
raise an a fair baby. Am I wrong for asking
my husband to find another option for their son?
Speaker 1 (01:11):
Wow?
Speaker 3 (01:12):
I know I've been. I'm stressed.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
Yeah, I mean why you just bring that on us
on like a just a wow, oh on a random
I wouldn't I wouldn't expect.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Is very heavy, Yes, very very heavy. And I think
you are wrong. You know, I think you are wrong.
You made the decision to stick with your husband, and
making that decision, you accepted his.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
Reality, which is he is a father of a child.
Speaker 2 (01:37):
Now you've been in Delululand for the last six years
and you all have had no responsibility to this child.
But now that the responsibility is in your face, you
want the child to be relocated from his living parent.
I think you need to pack your bags if this
is how you feel, and leave your husband and let
him raise his son and you go find someone who
(01:58):
is on the same type of time you're on, which
is you don't want to kid around. But it's not
fair to the child that you've accepted to stay with
your husband. But you don't want to accept his mistake,
you know, lack of better words, but the mistake that
came with it, that's not right. You can't find another
place for the sun to go. No, you find another
place for you to go.
Speaker 1 (02:17):
Yeah, you know. I mean they made a promise to
one another. If you buy into that till death do
his part, and you know he he made an error
if you want to call it that an indiscretion in
their marriage. This is the result. So this is the
hand that they're dealt exactly, And he's doing the right
thing because I mean, he should have been I don't
(02:39):
know why he wasn't involved from day one. He should
have been involved from day one exactly. So this should
have been something that they had done together for years
in some capacity. Why he wasn't, I don't know. Maybe
because of her I.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
Mean, and she said the best friend moved away, you know,
she moved away and they had she had no contact
with him after the affair was revealed. So you guys
failed the child on that end as well, because he
was now denied a father for the last six years. However,
and now the reality has hit and you you know,
your husband has to step up and be a father.
You can't ask for the child to be relocated somewhere
(03:13):
if anyone's.
Speaker 1 (03:13):
Going anywhere to Yeah, I agree, I agree eight five
five one of three five You got to the jury,
of course, But.
Speaker 2 (03:20):
I mean, I know it's hard. I've never been married,
so I don't know what an affair feels like. Let
alone with your best friend and there's a child that
comes from it, I'm sure that's hard, sis, But it's
been six years.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
Well, and she decided to stay with them, and easier
said than done. But with that would have to come forgiveness, right,
and the possibility and hopefully the acceptance that that child's
going to be a part of their lives. And I
don't know what happened the first six years, but where's
the kid supposed to go?
Speaker 3 (03:47):
Exactly?
Speaker 2 (03:48):
Like I don't know, she's saying, like maybe to the
grandparents or I mean, at this point, I'll take the
kid because what I don't want is for the kids
to be raised in a household with someone who doesn't
love him, you know, And that's the worst. Like he
didn't ask to be here, he didn't ask to be
put in this situation. And a lot of times parents
are you know, step parents are put into a new
(04:09):
place with kids and they don't necessarily like the kid.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
The kids can feel that. So if you're not gonna
love the kids, then get away from you.
Speaker 1 (04:15):
She's got to go because I heard this long time ago.
It was a long long time ago, changed my perspective
on everything. It had to do. It was it was
some talk show something and it was one of the
politicians who had cheated. And it gets to this whole
conversation about like, why do you stay married if you
have a family. Do you stay married for the kids,
(04:37):
or do you stay married for the spouse or really,
more importantly, bless you, who is more important in a relationship?
Your spouse are your kids? And I feel like the
right answer optically is to say your kids, My kids
are the most important thing. But I don't think that's
the right answer. I think your spouse is the most
important thing. That being said, this guy has an obligation now, right,
(05:01):
So the kid isn't necessarily more important than her, But
she isn't going to accept that this is a part
of him, right, which means that it's dysfunctional from the top,
which means that it needs to end exactly because I
would normally argue, you got to take care of the
base relationship first, you got to take care of the
marriage first, and foremost, and the kids will will And
that doesn't mean the kids are like a far second.
(05:22):
I just think that the kids then will wind up
having a better chance at a good existence if mom
and dad are happy. Yes, But in this particular case,
I don't think she's ever going to come around. She's
already saying get rid of the kid, So that's already flawed.
The dad has an obligation to his child. The wife
has an obligation to her husband if she forgave him right,
(05:42):
So this is just a package deal. Now it has
to be the package.
Speaker 2 (05:45):
Like I don't And it seems like to me you're
taking out your resentment for your husband's affair on your
ex best friend and the child. Where's the responsibility that
should follow on your husband who that's who you had
vows with. Yes, you're my best friend, but you and
I took about again, So my loyalty should be to
you and I, Between you and I. I shouldn't look
to my best friend and hold her completely accountable for
(06:07):
this whole situation. Like your husband has some fault in
this as well, and this is just a part of
what he the decision he made. And now, if you're
going to stick around. You need to love this.
Speaker 3 (06:15):
Child like it's not the child.
Speaker 1 (06:17):
He's got to go, he's him and a child have
to go before because there's no way that woman is
that that kid has no chance with that woman like
just a spie. You know, how do we get rid
of him? Right? Or is it him? How do you
know if they were to stay and be like, yo,
I know where you came from. You know what I'm
saying from this, I don't like the attitude from the
(06:38):
very beginning. Hey Karen, Hi, Karen, good morning? Hey, what
say you? I would say that this woman has to go?
Speaker 3 (06:50):
You know, she should have gone six years ago when
he's an affair and a kid and everything that was.
Why is she complaining now, well.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
They should have been involved in the past six years.
It makes me wonder if if they if he wasn't
involved because she said he couldn't be, which I then
we have to look at him a little bit and say,
at what point does his obligation as the father come
before her desire not to want to have a child,
Because again she has the choice to leave, but she
chose to forgive him, and in forgiving him, this is
(07:23):
this is a new reality exactly, and then she knew
about the kid. The kid is here, he is not
going anywhere. She's not the.
Speaker 3 (07:31):
Kids, paul So she was gone, Yes, I agree.
Speaker 1 (07:37):
I agree, Thank you Karen. You have a good day.
Speaker 3 (07:40):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (07:41):
Yeah. I mean, like I said, I would say, normally,
you know, you try and the relationship, the husband and
wife relationship has got to be sound. But she's already
saying basically, there's no way. There's no way.
Speaker 2 (07:52):
And I just say that for six years, she's been
able to live in this delusion, like maybe she's made
herself believe that this didn't really happen, or that there was.
Speaker 3 (07:59):
No child that came from this relationship. She blocked it out.
Speaker 2 (08:02):
Yeah, and you can't do that, Like you have to
accept everything that comes with this man in his affair, so.
Speaker 1 (08:08):
Or don't or don't or don't. But he has an
obligation to this child.
Speaker 3 (08:13):
That's it.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
He should get back with the other woman, help her
through sobriety, and then raise that kid.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
We get message woman, and I don't want to sound
its sensitive to her situation. Can you imagine your best
your childhood best friend, having a baby with your husband.
Speaker 3 (08:32):
No, I can't, Pauline, When were we in jail, girl.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
All of us.
Speaker 3 (08:36):
I can't imagine the trauma that would come from that,
but no.
Speaker 1 (08:39):
I'd be long gone. Honestly, if if it were being
really honest, I don't know that I could forgive that.
Speaker 3 (08:44):
I don't think so.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
And I think that you guys just go live your
life and raise this child together, because I don't. I
don't know that I that as she's mem but I
certainly would not make somebody if I chose to forgive them,
then I have to accept everything that comes with that,
and I wouldn't. It wouldn't be I would never say
to that person. Will No, we're not doing that right.
The kid has to go somewhere else. I don't know.
Not my problem. It is your problem now, it is.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
And girl, you just got to accept that reality. I'm
so sorry. I mean, I know it hurts.
Speaker 1 (09:10):
You.
Speaker 3 (09:10):
Gotta look at the kid every day.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
Said they came in late the kiki, Yes, give us
a thirty second.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
Went to my courtroom late, apologize your honor?
Speaker 1 (09:21):
Yeah, yeah, recap. So this so a woman is reaching
out to you because her husband cheated on her with
her best friend and got her pregnant. Yes, six years ago.
The woman the best friend and the kid. They go off,
moved away, and they don't have any role in that
child's life. The woman then comes back and says, hey,
(09:44):
I can't raise him. I'm having issues on my own.
You need to raise him. So now the husband's like,
well okay, I'm in, and the wife is going, hey,
we I never agreed to the kids, so I'm I
want we don't I want out?
Speaker 2 (09:55):
Basically, well, she's not saying she wants that, she wants
the kid. She said, can we find somewhere else for
this kids to go?
Speaker 1 (10:01):
So no? Bye? No, I mean this is I feel
like this is like a unanimous court decision.
Speaker 3 (10:10):
Exist.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
Well, bang your gavel again.
Speaker 3 (10:12):
Oh there we go.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
Just open a shut just like that problem solve. See
you later, late, lady. Yeah yeah, that's sounded menacing, didn't it.
See you later, lady? You take that? Yeah? Bye, But
you didn't see that one coming, did you. How we
lost the listener and maybe we gain three I'm not sure.
The kid and then the other two. Rupie over here
(10:35):
is saying go get with her now,