Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Roofie. I was hard. He's hard. Resident convicted fellon. Are
you really a felon? No, I'm not a felon. No,
you're not a fellon. Yeah, I know.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
I only went for like eighteen hours. Yeah, oh you
know more.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
I did five days. Yeah, you went bro it was
like the racing cars, like zoom zoom fast, That's what
it was.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
It was for Yeah, for pretty much reckless driving.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
I was.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
I was supposed to do ten days of like community service,
and I only did five. And then so when I
went back to the judge, he's like, oh, you didn't finish.
I'm like, well, you know, I have work, that's not
my problem, right.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
He's just like, yeah, not.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
The judges probably finished the rest of the days in jail.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Yeah. Yeah, I love that. You thought that would work, right,
That's what gets me.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
No, I was just trying to get an extension on it,
and he's just like, nope, that's right.
Speaker 1 (00:46):
I didn't realize the judge matthows a couple of people
in jail like that, Yeah, and so can I Yeah
on Mondays exactly.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
So, I you know, I sat in the courthouse waiting
for everyone else to get done with the court and
then got on that bus, the bus you see driving.
Speaker 1 (00:59):
You know with the county.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
Yeah, with you get you get the handcuffed to the chair,
to the seat never oh wow, by the shackles, you know.
And then and then we got to the jail. And
then it was even scarier because you're in a bigger
holding cell with every criminal.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
Yeah, they don't sort.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
You out because then you have to do the sorting
process like what house you're going to be in, Like
it's Harry Potter, you know.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
Which which fraternity fraternities in jail this is.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
Yeah, there's like minimum, medium, and maximum. And so you're
in that room, in that big cell with everybody you
don't know.
Speaker 1 (01:35):
Who did what? Yeah, right, did you pretend to be
a gang member? I was gonna say, did you do
what they say you're supposed to do? And going there
and just whoop somebody's ass. I was going to punch
somebody right in the face and be like boom, I'm
in charge. Now, I'm the captain. Now.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
I made money in that holding cell because I was
one of the only people that had.
Speaker 1 (01:52):
A phone, Like before they take it away, what a.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
Little People were like, hey, I'll give you a couple bucks.
And let me use your phone real quick. I was like, sure,
did they have money on them? Yeah, because they didn't
take your stuff until the processing. Yeah, I got it.
Speaker 3 (02:05):
That was a new part of the sparat cheeks right
to north get it.
Speaker 1 (02:09):
Yeah you had a boyfriend, right, yeah, cheeks.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
You gotta do the you had to do the swab
in the in the in the in the whole. Now
right that I'm out, they got everything else, I'm down
for you.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
It sounds kind of sounds amazing. Yeah, swab, yeah, you
do that, you get it's all a card get like
you know that. I'm going to skip that stage. Yeah.
The rest of it sounds okay. We are the showers. Wow.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
Then you get your your whatever, your you're fit, your
d o c here your easy slides. You have to
I had to wear my I had to take the
laces out of my shoes.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
And you wear my shoes. Oh. I had easy slides.
They were like plastic. Wow.
Speaker 2 (02:52):
And then the first thing you had to do when
you got to your little bunk house was They're like,
gotta take a shower.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
The first thing you got to do.
Speaker 4 (02:57):
You had Rea bang and yeah, he was quite the
trouble maker and if I needed toothpaste or that like
toilet paper I.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Had to trade in my lunch. Yeah, I wasn't gonna like, hey, Dan,
can you put the one hundred dollars in my commissary.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
I'll be here for a week. You kind of call
them though, right, And I did come ye.
Speaker 2 (03:18):
And you know you got a click call from coming
I'm sure. I mean I told them that I might
not come back because like like when I went to court, like, yeah,
I was like, my car is still there, Dad, you
might have some mom, Dad, go get that I'm going
to war. Yeah, it's pretty much like I'll see in
a week. I was like, I'll be out in five days.
(03:40):
Come get me five days.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
Oh wow, look at this guy, always trying to skirt
the rules, always trying to skirt the rules. Yeah, no, no,
I'm sorry, judge. I had to work. Yeah, I can't
do your well. They told me.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
They told me when I went to the community service.
They're like, I was like, I did five days and
they're like, hey, see it, see you next week. And
I was like, I have work and they're like, oh
if you if you missed one day, don't even bother
coming back. And I was like okay, and I just
went to court. I knew something was gonna happen. I
was like, I was going asked for an extension and
then he's just like sorry.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
Yeah, I mean Ruvio went didn't know he was scared straight.
He was. He was real life scared straight. Yes, man. Yeah,
and look at look look at the functioning, contributing member
of society. You are unbelievable.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
I learn how to play dominoes.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
That was a saculay. Yeah. And Camlin had a brief
drive by through jail. I was just briefly detained for
being a designated driver. Oh my god. Yeah. Yeah, and
my parents told the cops to like do whatever they wanted,
basically like and like the cops. My mom will agree
with this part of the story. The cops were even like, well,
(04:49):
he didn't do anything wrong, like we're gonna cut him loose.
It was all of his friends that were drinking because
he it was my night to be the designated driver,
and I took that responsibility very seriously. And the cops
are like, we can't cut him loose. So he didn't
do anything, and parents like, nope, keep him, keep him,
make him sit there with all of his friends, and
we're gonna come get him, and then we're gonna be
He's gonna be in big trouble, and I was in
big trouble. And I'm like, I just want to be clear.
(05:10):
You're grounding me for being a designated driver. Well you
should have been there to begin with. That's right. No,
that's not right, that's right. What should I have been doing?
Even less? Being being even less popular than I was?
I mean, one go down, we all go down. You
gotta go down with the crew. Get out of here,
get out of here. We're a bunch of private school
nerds drinking a can of beer at like in park.
(05:33):
I mean yeah, I mean, you're just so silly. My
mom would have thrown me a party if I was
the DD. She would have there would have been like posters.
She would have been so proud. I was having this
conversation with someone yesterday. It was like my parents were
wildly effective because when they hear like, oh, you were
a twenty one year old virgin and you you know
you were you like follow the rules and stuff. People
(05:55):
were like, so you was like religious or something. It's
like no, they were just wildly effective and like, hey,
look you can do whatever you want with you know,
for the most part, but like you know, if you
get somebody pregnant you, it's all over, it's all over.
And you know, if you get a duy, it's all over.
And by the way, no one should be getting uys.
But they were just and I was afraid to disappoint them.
(06:18):
M hmm. That's what love about your parents.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
I want to sit down with your parents and Jason's parents, well,
because you're an only child and I feel they did
a really good job with you. But I really want
to know, like, what does it take for my kid
to be afraid of me in that way?
Speaker 1 (06:30):
Like to respect me so much? You know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
I don't want to whiper athic. I I got my
ass whooped all the time. We're not doing that, but
I want to be able to like they didn't even
do that.
Speaker 1 (06:39):
It was just like I don't know why I was
just I was so concerned about disappointing my parents. I know,
I love it.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
You don't want to sit down with Rufio or ice
parents on.
Speaker 1 (06:52):
How'd you do it? How did you create this specimen?
I don't know. Maybe maybe that's the question. How do
I not do that what would you do differently? Well
you turn look at you. You turn to be a
great dad, good friend, very loyal. Yeah you know, so
everything worked out. Okay, Yeah, I just you know, I
(07:14):
just I love trouble growing up, That's what it was.
We all got a pass that boy. Yeah he started
and like.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
I mean, I used to steal, like uh in like
sixth grade, we got in trouble for stealing the little
chromies off of cars and like the little valve covers and.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
The hood ornaments.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
Oh yeah, we got in trouble for that at my my,
My crime spree started at a young age.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
Wow, Like what did you I don't know if we
did like wanted to.
Speaker 2 (07:43):
Well, I never had any money as a kid, so
we just they just so we.
Speaker 1 (07:46):
Just stole from people. Yeah, that's how it works normally. Yeah,
kids don't do well, there aren't any kids. They're like
the kids don't do anything. You're hearing right now, right,
don't do it even though he you know, famous in
his own eyes and making a gainful living and you know,
it's a good husband and a good father. Aside from that,
don't do anything you're hearing right now. Crime doesn't really
(08:09):
pay off. Even though it kind of sounds like it
does right now, it really doesn't. You have to go
to jail and spread your cheeks and eat by sandwiches
and sell access to your phone. It's very scary. Don't
do it.
Roofie. I was hard. He's hard. Resident convicted fellon. Are
you really a felon? No, I'm not a felon. No,
you're not a fellon. Yeah, I know.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
I only went for like eighteen hours. Yeah, oh you
know more.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
I did five days. Yeah, you went bro it was
like the racing cars, like zoom zoom fast, That's what
it was.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
It was for Yeah, for pretty much reckless driving.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
I was.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
I was supposed to do ten days of like community service,
and I only did five. And then so when I
went back to the judge, he's like, oh, you didn't finish.
I'm like, well, you know, I have work, that's not
my problem, right.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
He's just like, yeah, not.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
The judges probably finished the rest of the days in jail.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Yeah. Yeah, I love that. You thought that would work, right,
That's what gets me.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
No, I was just trying to get an extension on it,
and he's just like, nope, that's right.
Speaker 1 (00:46):
I didn't realize the judge matthows a couple of people
in jail like that, Yeah, and so can I Yeah
on Mondays exactly.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
So, I you know, I sat in the courthouse waiting
for everyone else to get done with the court and
then got on that bus, the bus you see driving.
Speaker 1 (00:59):
You know with the county.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
Yeah, with you get you get the handcuffed to the chair,
to the seat never oh wow, by the shackles, you know.
And then and then we got to the jail. And
then it was even scarier because you're in a bigger
holding cell with every criminal.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
Yeah, they don't sort.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
You out because then you have to do the sorting
process like what house you're going to be in, Like
it's Harry Potter, you know.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
Which which fraternity fraternities in jail this is.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
Yeah, there's like minimum, medium, and maximum. And so you're
in that room, in that big cell with everybody you
don't know.
Speaker 1 (01:35):
Who did what? Yeah, right, did you pretend to be
a gang member? I was gonna say, did you do
what they say you're supposed to do? And going there
and just whoop somebody's ass. I was going to punch
somebody right in the face and be like boom, I'm
in charge. Now, I'm the captain. Now.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
I made money in that holding cell because I was
one of the only people that had.
Speaker 1 (01:52):
A phone, Like before they take it away, what a.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
Little People were like, hey, I'll give you a couple bucks.
And let me use your phone real quick. I was like, sure,
did they have money on them? Yeah, because they didn't
take your stuff until the processing. Yeah, I got it.
Speaker 3 (02:05):
That was a new part of the sparat cheeks right
to north get it.
Speaker 1 (02:09):
Yeah you had a boyfriend, right, yeah, cheeks.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
You gotta do the you had to do the swab
in the in the in the in the whole. Now
right that I'm out, they got everything else, I'm down
for you.
Speaker 1 (02:22):
It sounds kind of sounds amazing. Yeah, swab, yeah, you
do that, you get it's all a card get like
you know that. I'm going to skip that stage. Yeah.
The rest of it sounds okay. We are the showers. Wow.
Speaker 2 (02:39):
Then you get your your whatever, your you're fit, your
d o c here your easy slides. You have to
I had to wear my I had to take the
laces out of my shoes.
Speaker 1 (02:47):
And you wear my shoes. Oh. I had easy slides.
They were like plastic. Wow.
Speaker 2 (02:52):
And then the first thing you had to do when
you got to your little bunk house was They're like,
gotta take a shower.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
The first thing you got to do.
Speaker 4 (02:57):
You had Rea bang and yeah, he was quite the
trouble maker and if I needed toothpaste or that like
toilet paper I.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Had to trade in my lunch. Yeah, I wasn't gonna like, hey, Dan,
can you put the one hundred dollars in my commissary.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
I'll be here for a week. You kind of call
them though, right, And I did come ye.
Speaker 2 (03:18):
And you know you got a click call from coming
I'm sure. I mean I told them that I might
not come back because like like when I went to court, like, yeah,
I was like, my car is still there, Dad, you
might have some mom, Dad, go get that I'm going
to war. Yeah, it's pretty much like I'll see in
a week. I was like, I'll be out in five days.
(03:40):
Come get me five days.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
Oh wow, look at this guy, always trying to skirt
the rules, always trying to skirt the rules. Yeah, no, no,
I'm sorry, judge. I had to work. Yeah, I can't
do your well. They told me.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
They told me when I went to the community service.
They're like, I was like, I did five days and
they're like, hey, see it, see you next week. And
I was like, I have work and they're like, oh
if you if you missed one day, don't even bother
coming back. And I was like okay, and I just
went to court. I knew something was gonna happen. I
was like, I was going asked for an extension and
then he's just like sorry.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
Yeah, I mean Ruvio went didn't know he was scared straight.
He was. He was real life scared straight. Yes, man. Yeah,
and look at look look at the functioning, contributing member
of society. You are unbelievable.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
I learn how to play dominoes.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
That was a saculay. Yeah. And Camlin had a brief
drive by through jail. I was just briefly detained for
being a designated driver. Oh my god. Yeah. Yeah, and
my parents told the cops to like do whatever they wanted,
basically like and like the cops. My mom will agree
with this part of the story. The cops were even like, well,
(04:49):
he didn't do anything wrong, like we're gonna cut him loose.
It was all of his friends that were drinking because
he it was my night to be the designated driver,
and I took that responsibility very seriously. And the cops
are like, we can't cut him loose. So he didn't
do anything, and parents like, nope, keep him, keep him,
make him sit there with all of his friends, and
we're gonna come get him, and then we're gonna be
He's gonna be in big trouble, and I was in
big trouble. And I'm like, I just want to be clear.
(05:10):
You're grounding me for being a designated driver. Well you
should have been there to begin with. That's right. No,
that's not right, that's right. What should I have been doing?
Even less? Being being even less popular than I was?
I mean, one go down, we all go down. You
gotta go down with the crew. Get out of here,
get out of here. We're a bunch of private school
nerds drinking a can of beer at like in park.
(05:33):
I mean yeah, I mean, you're just so silly. My
mom would have thrown me a party if I was
the DD. She would have there would have been like posters.
She would have been so proud. I was having this
conversation with someone yesterday. It was like my parents were
wildly effective because when they hear like, oh, you were
a twenty one year old virgin and you you know
you were you like follow the rules and stuff. People
(05:55):
were like, so you was like religious or something. It's
like no, they were just wildly effective and like, hey,
look you can do whatever you want with you know,
for the most part, but like you know, if you
get somebody pregnant you, it's all over, it's all over.
And you know, if you get a duy, it's all over.
And by the way, no one should be getting uys.
But they were just and I was afraid to disappoint them.
(06:18):
M hmm. That's what love about your parents.
Speaker 3 (06:21):
I want to sit down with your parents and Jason's parents, well,
because you're an only child and I feel they did
a really good job with you. But I really want
to know, like, what does it take for my kid
to be afraid of me in that way?
Speaker 1 (06:30):
Like to respect me so much? You know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
I don't want to whiper athic. I I got my
ass whooped all the time. We're not doing that, but
I want to be able to like they didn't even
do that.
Speaker 1 (06:39):
It was just like I don't know why I was
just I was so concerned about disappointing my parents. I know,
I love it.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
You don't want to sit down with Rufio or ice
parents on.
Speaker 1 (06:52):
How'd you do it? How did you create this specimen?
I don't know. Maybe maybe that's the question. How do
I not do that what would you do differently? Well
you turn look at you. You turn to be a
great dad, good friend, very loyal. Yeah you know, so
everything worked out. Okay, Yeah, I just you know, I
(07:14):
just I love trouble growing up, That's what it was.
We all got a pass that boy. Yeah he started
and like.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
I mean, I used to steal, like uh in like
sixth grade, we got in trouble for stealing the little
chromies off of cars and like the little valve covers and.
Speaker 1 (07:33):
The hood ornaments.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
Oh yeah, we got in trouble for that at my my,
My crime spree started at a young age.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
Wow, Like what did you I don't know if we
did like wanted to.
Speaker 2 (07:43):
Well, I never had any money as a kid, so
we just they just so we.
Speaker 1 (07:46):
Just stole from people. Yeah, that's how it works normally. Yeah,
kids don't do well, there aren't any kids. They're like
the kids don't do anything. You're hearing right now, right,
don't do it even though he you know, famous in
his own eyes and making a gainful living and you know,
it's a good husband and a good father. Aside from that,
don't do anything you're hearing right now. Crime doesn't really
(08:09):
pay off. Even though it kind of sounds like it
does right now, it really doesn't. You have to go
to jail and spread your cheeks and eat by sandwiches
and sell access to your phone. It's very scary. Don't
do it.
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