August 5, 2024 • 14 mins
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
It's a fresh show. It's Kiki's court rise. The honorable
judge kikys here take it away.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Please all right, let's step into the courtroom. The gavel
has been hit, it says Kiki. My name is Casey.
I went through a horrible divorce with my ex of
nine years. I caught him in our home with our nanny.
He later divorced me for the nanny and rolled off
into the sunset, leaving me to raise our kids alone.
Since I break up, he's become more of a FaceTime
(00:28):
father instead of a hands on dad that he used
to be. He left me with basically no money, and
I had to work extremely hard to rebuild my life
for myself and my kids. Now, three months ago, he
found out that he's sick and he was forced to
leave his job. He began chemo treatments, but shortly after
his diagnosis, his little miss nanny packed up her bags
(00:48):
and left him.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
Oh no, yeah, so I got a text. I got
a text.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
From my ex last week asking me if he can
move back in with me and the kids until he's
done with his chemo treatment and he is back on
his feet. He's drowning in medical bills and has no
one to support him. He said he just wants to
be near his kids during this time. To be honest, Kikey,
I don't want him anywhere near me. I've worked too
hard to heal and I'm in a new healthy relationship.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
But I do feel bad for my kids. What should
I do? What do you think?
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Well, I've thought about this case all weekend. Okay, I'm
at La Llapaloo's. I'm like, it's Casey gonna do it
because my heart right, Like I'm a punk, I'm a
sucker sometimes, and I will would allow this man back
in my life for my kids because and she said, chemo,
so you just never know what he's dealing with. I
would have let him back in, But after much consideration
(01:44):
and thought, I think she should not let him back
in the house. I think you make choices in life,
and sometimes you have consequences as a repercussion of your decisions.
He made his decision, he made his bed. He needs
to lie in it now, and I don't think it's
on her to interrupt her life and her healing and
her new relationship by allowing him back into the home.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
You guys are the jury eight five nine, one three five,
you can call him text the same number. See, because
here's the thing. Of course, my initial reaction, Kiki, is
to say, no, you know, you don't get to come back.
You betrayed this family. You're not a contributing member of
this family. And frankly, maybe the only reason that you're
looking for a place to go is because the girl
who you cheated on me with left you. Right where
(02:27):
were you before? Where were you trying to make a
contribution before? You weren't? Now you're doing it because you're
lonely and scared. Yes. On the flip side, that is
the father of your children, And so it's like, do
you do you show grace simply because that is what's
best for the kids. But I don't even know if
that's what's best for the kids because it doesn't even
sound like he's a very active father, right, So, like
(02:50):
that's a really hard one because you know, maybe he
wants redemption and maybe maybe maybe this is his chance to,
you know, at the end, do the right thing, But like,
should you have to take that risk emotionally considering what
you've had to battle to get through it?
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Exactly? And this is the mess that he created, This
is the life. He chose yes, so I don't know.
Speaker 3 (03:13):
Yes, ravel I would allow him to have the kids
back in his life, but not at not bringing him
into the house, you know what I'm saying, Like, if
he wants to be if he wants his kids around,
he could go to his parents' house where his parents at.
Speaker 1 (03:25):
You know what I'm saying, live with your parents. The
kids could go over there.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
But you ain't coming into my house after all that
stuff you did and say, oh, but it's it's for
the kids, right.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
Kids could be in.
Speaker 3 (03:34):
Your life somewhere else, not here at my house. You
ain't moving in back with me.
Speaker 1 (03:38):
It is interesting that he now wants back in now
that he has no he'sically no one else in his life. Yeah,
he's managed to alienate himself from everyone in favor of
this woman who didn't stand by him, and so now
he wants back in. But again, you know, I always
I respect so much the parents who are able to
put their parenting above their adult issues, but sometimes that's
(04:01):
just not possible. And by the way, that tends to
be the case when the parents are still doing their
job as parents, right, Like, if you still want to
parent your kids and be a great parent, But you
screwed over your partner, that's one thing. And I can't
imagine how hard it would be to rise above that.
But I know people to do it because it's best
for the kids, right right, Because that was an adult
(04:24):
fracture and it didn't have anything to new with the children.
This dude wasn't even doing that though. No, he wasn't
even active with his kids. Now all of a sudden,
he wants all of it because he's got nowhere to go.
And I don't know. I guess I'm inclined to say
no FaceTime dad, right? Is that what you said? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (04:38):
Yeah, she said he turned into a FaceTime that's terrible.
And somebody shows you who they are. I'm sorry, you
have to believe them. And yes, I know people change,
I understand that, but it shouldn't take a chronic illness
or just something that you know could potentially end your
life for you to step up and be like, I
want to be a part of my kids lives again.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
I want to be this again. Yeah, and Pauline, it
doesn't sound like he's like she's blocking access to the kids.
It sounds like he doesn't. He doesn't, he doesn't attempt
access to the kids. Right, So this isn't about whether
he can see the kids or not. It doesn't sound
like he was ever forbidden from that. But I agree
with rufiel I. I don't think that they need to
live together for this. That sounds like it benefited him
(05:14):
more than her. Hey, Tiffany, good morning, Good morning, Tiffany.
You just heard it Kiki's court. What do you think.
Speaker 5 (05:22):
I think that it role models bad behavior to the
children to allow this man back into the house. Not
only did he leave, but he brought the nanny who
had so much support to these children out of these
children's flying.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
That's true if you.
Speaker 5 (05:40):
Turn around and then say, oh, because he's sick, everything's
magically better when these children grow up, or are they
going to think a partner can do whatever they want
and walk all over them, but when they're sick it's
magically better.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
Yeah, Tiffany, he put a lot of stuff ahead of
his family already. And it's not to say you can't
forgive someone, but how much forgiven to you offer in
favor of your peace of mind?
Speaker 6 (06:03):
Right?
Speaker 2 (06:03):
And then she's in a new relationship, how does her
partner feel about this?
Speaker 1 (06:06):
Yeah, when he's going to move back in the house,
and she's trying to move on with her life based
on circumstances that that that more more than not he
presented exactly. I mean, look, people, you know fractures in
relationships are caused by both people. But it doesn't give
you the right to cheat. Doesn't give you a right
to cheat with the nanny. No, it doesn't give you
a right to ignore your children and family and your
obligations until you get sick and then now you need
(06:28):
them right and you.
Speaker 5 (06:31):
Will be forced to participate as a caretaker. The children
will be forced to very outside of their world of
child the children.
Speaker 1 (06:39):
Yeah, I agree. Thank you, Tiffany, have a great day,
thanks for calling being part of the thirteen. Hey Lewis,
good morning, Welcome. How are you done, Lewis, you're going
through something like this, I'm sorry to hear it.
Speaker 6 (06:50):
So my ex wife, she we went to a really
bad divorce, but I wanted up but so custody of
my son and I actually brought it back to for
child support in the midst of sport. She shows up
one day and I'm like, she's in a hospital and
why not say stage four cancer, she's now terminal. But
(07:11):
for the previous five years. She had no inclination to
be regular in her son's life. So a part of
me would like screw her, but then a part of
me said, okay, well it's still his mom. But at
the end of the day, I think it's really calmer,
Like you don't get to come along now that you're
sick and realize you messed up in life if you
(07:32):
weren't there for your children. You know, you made your choice.
Now you got to deal with it, whether you're dying
or not. I mean, I wish you the best, but
like now, I don't force my son to go see
his mother. If he wants to hear her, then yeah,
that's his choice. He's a little bit older now, but
it still affects him emotionally immensely. So the toilet takes
(07:52):
on your child is it's hard to watch them go
through that.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
Yeah, yeah, I'm Lewis. I'm sorry you're going through it
and thanks for thanks for sharing. Lewis. See, the hard
part is like somehow the person who wants to do
right is the person who winds up feeling the most guilty. Yes,
and I'm not going like I'm being vague because it's
not really well for me to talk about. But I
(08:18):
can relate to this situation not romantically but familiar, familiarly
when someone's sort of an outcast and they earned it,
they earn they earned the right to be an outcast.
And then something happens and and what's interesting is instantly
I start to feel guilty, like, well, what would the
what's the right thing to do here? Well, the right
thing to do here I suppose based on you know,
(08:40):
I don't know general the general rule would be that
you you let all your stuff go to help the
person who's in need. But then, honestly, you have to
circle back and then say to yourself, did this person
make any effort when they were well? Nor did this
person contribute when they were well?
Speaker 6 (08:56):
No?
Speaker 1 (08:57):
And what is the cost to me? You know what
I'm saying, like, like, what did my relationship with this person
do to me? How hard have I had to work
to get past it? And why should I have to
give up on all that work to make sure that
you feel better? For what? For this? For this floating
concept of what's right right? You can try and try
and try, and you're gonna get the same results. At
(09:18):
what point do you just give up even when it's
a sad situation and not have to feel bad about it.
Speaker 2 (09:23):
It has to be hard because you you think about
who this person was when they were on their feet,
when he was healthy, and he wasn't a great guy, right,
And so it's like, what if I sacrifice my new relationship,
my piece, my happiness and try to help help you
get through this, then you get back on your feet
and show my kids again that you don't love them
or you don't really support them.
Speaker 7 (09:43):
You know.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
It's like pie in the face twice.
Speaker 2 (09:45):
Yeah, I'm like, girl, you got to put yourself first.
And I know it's going to be hard, and God
for I hope he beats his situation.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
No one wishing, yeah, you know.
Speaker 8 (09:53):
But.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
I would be like, now, this is the opportunity for
you to show that you are truly a changed person,
not when you're and it's your you know, yeah the bottom.
Speaker 1 (10:02):
Yeah, no, go ahead.
Speaker 4 (10:03):
I'm just more heated than I was five minutes ago,
because now that I think about it, he's looking for
a caregiver, which a lot of listeners have said too
as well.
Speaker 1 (10:09):
But the's scared undred percent.
Speaker 4 (10:12):
But didn't he break those vows like when he cheated,
and when he moved down, he did all of this. So,
like they say, what it well through sickness and through health, right, yeah,
I think that's what they say. I don't even know
what I'm here health and took to do not with him,
but has to my own volt. He broke his vowels
and he cheated, left his family. Now he wants his
(10:32):
family back, and he wants a caregiver. And it's typical
as women, we always have to be expected to care
for others. So I'm proud of her for standing her ground,
and I.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
Hope she doesn't go back and let him in the house.
And I do think you have to People may disagree
with him, but I do think you have to ask
the question would he have done this otherwise? And based
on his previous behavior, The answer is no, no, Based
on his previous behavior, he would have put himself first,
and he still is in doing this. By the way,
this has nothing to do with her and nothing to
do with his kids. This has to do with his
fear and his regret and and and his selfishness. And
(11:02):
I know that's a horrible thing to say about somebody
who's sick, but I think that's your answer is, would
he have come to this conclusion short of it being
a very scary situation, and based on what you're telling me,
he never would have now.
Speaker 2 (11:16):
And I think the nanny would have never left. She
was happy living a life with him. But the moment
he lost his job and he was down on his luck,
she got right up out of there. Yeah, and now
he's looking.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
At well there you go. Yeah, so that he gave
it all up for her and that didn't work out. Angelica, Hi, Hi,
good morning guys. Hey, what do you want to say?
Good morning? Thanks for listening. By the way, of course,
I think.
Speaker 7 (11:41):
You guys are all on the right track. I think
everyone's in agreement, and not to say because we're all
best people and we don't wish well on this guy
who's you know, doing horrible. But like going back to
the whole vows that you're married, they're divorced, and he's
no longer her obligation.
Speaker 8 (12:01):
She's moved on. She's moved on. He's definitely made it
clear that he's moved on. And going back to what
Rufio said, I think the best case scenario would be
you know, fine, you don't I can't take care of you,
but I'll bring the kids to you wherever you may be.
Speaker 1 (12:22):
But see again and kid. Yeah, and I'm sorrying to
rupt you, but like, based on the story that I
just heard the way that I understand it from Kiki,
she was never preventing him from seeing his kids. He
was choosing not to because he was absent and you know,
the best he could do is a FaceTime because he
was too busy with the nanny or whatever. He was
putting everybody else first. And so I agree with you,
But again, it's not as though she was saying, you
(12:42):
can't see the kids and now they now she can.
He was always open to see the kids. He just
didn't do it right.
Speaker 8 (12:50):
And depending on how old the kids are, maybe give.
Speaker 1 (12:53):
Them that option. Yeah, yeah, I mean yeah right, just
a song, just a song, but again, a very adult
thing to put on children. Hey, do you want to
see your absent minded father because he's dying right Well,
they're going to say yes because that's because that seems
like the right thing to do. But after how many
attempts do we then put our own piece first? Is
(13:13):
my question? And I feel like we're beyond the point
of putting our own peace first. Because you know, God
forbid me. I don't wan anything bad to happen to
this guy. But you bring him back into your life
and he does all the same stuff all over again
that he's been doing, and then he tears you guys
all down again and you got to rebuild all simply
because something bad happened to him. So it's part for
(13:34):
the course, it's more about him. Yeah, right, you know, right,
And I'm.
Speaker 8 (13:39):
On my own journey of boundaries, so I think everyone
should set boundaries at some point. But it's hard.
Speaker 1 (13:46):
So yeah, I know it's hard, right because you feel
like the bad person because the right thing and I'm
doing the air quotes thing. The right thing to do
is always to forgive and get people what they need
because they're going through a hard time. It's like, but
at what point is that no longer the right thing?
Because you you you've you've done enough that I don't
have to consider the right thing anymore. That's a hard
question to answer. But Angelica, good luck to you, thanks
(14:06):
for calling. Thank you all right, So Kiki decided there
it is.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
I just want to I mean, I'm telling you I
was stressed over the weekend.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
I felt.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
That's how that's a hard one, but girl, you got
to put yourself first. I'm sorry, that's a hard one.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
The Space, yeah,
It's a fresh show. It's Kiki's court rise. The honorable
judge kikys here take it away.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Please all right, let's step into the courtroom. The gavel
has been hit, it says Kiki. My name is Casey.
I went through a horrible divorce with my ex of
nine years. I caught him in our home with our nanny.
He later divorced me for the nanny and rolled off
into the sunset, leaving me to raise our kids alone.
Since I break up, he's become more of a FaceTime
(00:28):
father instead of a hands on dad that he used
to be. He left me with basically no money, and
I had to work extremely hard to rebuild my life
for myself and my kids. Now, three months ago, he
found out that he's sick and he was forced to
leave his job. He began chemo treatments, but shortly after
his diagnosis, his little miss nanny packed up her bags
(00:48):
and left him.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
Oh no, yeah, so I got a text. I got
a text.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
From my ex last week asking me if he can
move back in with me and the kids until he's
done with his chemo treatment and he is back on
his feet. He's drowning in medical bills and has no
one to support him. He said he just wants to
be near his kids during this time. To be honest, Kikey,
I don't want him anywhere near me. I've worked too
hard to heal and I'm in a new healthy relationship.
Speaker 1 (01:16):
But I do feel bad for my kids. What should
I do? What do you think?
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Well, I've thought about this case all weekend. Okay, I'm
at La Llapaloo's. I'm like, it's Casey gonna do it
because my heart right, Like I'm a punk, I'm a
sucker sometimes, and I will would allow this man back
in my life for my kids because and she said, chemo,
so you just never know what he's dealing with. I
would have let him back in, But after much consideration
(01:44):
and thought, I think she should not let him back
in the house. I think you make choices in life,
and sometimes you have consequences as a repercussion of your decisions.
He made his decision, he made his bed. He needs
to lie in it now, and I don't think it's
on her to interrupt her life and her healing and
her new relationship by allowing him back into the home.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
You guys are the jury eight five nine, one three five,
you can call him text the same number. See, because
here's the thing. Of course, my initial reaction, Kiki, is
to say, no, you know, you don't get to come back.
You betrayed this family. You're not a contributing member of
this family. And frankly, maybe the only reason that you're
looking for a place to go is because the girl
who you cheated on me with left you. Right where
(02:27):
were you before? Where were you trying to make a
contribution before? You weren't? Now you're doing it because you're
lonely and scared. Yes. On the flip side, that is
the father of your children, And so it's like, do
you do you show grace simply because that is what's
best for the kids. But I don't even know if
that's what's best for the kids because it doesn't even
sound like he's a very active father, right, So, like
(02:50):
that's a really hard one because you know, maybe he
wants redemption and maybe maybe maybe this is his chance to,
you know, at the end, do the right thing, But like,
should you have to take that risk emotionally considering what
you've had to battle to get through it?
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Exactly? And this is the mess that he created, This
is the life. He chose yes, so I don't know.
Speaker 3 (03:13):
Yes, ravel I would allow him to have the kids
back in his life, but not at not bringing him
into the house, you know what I'm saying, Like, if
he wants to be if he wants his kids around,
he could go to his parents' house where his parents at.
Speaker 1 (03:25):
You know what I'm saying, live with your parents. The
kids could go over there.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
But you ain't coming into my house after all that
stuff you did and say, oh, but it's it's for
the kids, right.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
Kids could be in.
Speaker 3 (03:34):
Your life somewhere else, not here at my house. You
ain't moving in back with me.
Speaker 1 (03:38):
It is interesting that he now wants back in now
that he has no he'sically no one else in his life. Yeah,
he's managed to alienate himself from everyone in favor of
this woman who didn't stand by him, and so now
he wants back in. But again, you know, I always
I respect so much the parents who are able to
put their parenting above their adult issues, but sometimes that's
(04:01):
just not possible. And by the way, that tends to
be the case when the parents are still doing their
job as parents, right, Like, if you still want to
parent your kids and be a great parent, But you
screwed over your partner, that's one thing. And I can't
imagine how hard it would be to rise above that.
But I know people to do it because it's best
for the kids, right right, Because that was an adult
(04:24):
fracture and it didn't have anything to new with the children.
This dude wasn't even doing that though. No, he wasn't
even active with his kids. Now all of a sudden,
he wants all of it because he's got nowhere to go.
And I don't know. I guess I'm inclined to say
no FaceTime dad, right? Is that what you said? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (04:38):
Yeah, she said he turned into a FaceTime that's terrible.
And somebody shows you who they are. I'm sorry, you
have to believe them. And yes, I know people change,
I understand that, but it shouldn't take a chronic illness
or just something that you know could potentially end your
life for you to step up and be like, I
want to be a part of my kids lives again.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
I want to be this again. Yeah, and Pauline, it
doesn't sound like he's like she's blocking access to the kids.
It sounds like he doesn't. He doesn't, he doesn't attempt
access to the kids. Right, So this isn't about whether
he can see the kids or not. It doesn't sound
like he was ever forbidden from that. But I agree
with rufiel I. I don't think that they need to
live together for this. That sounds like it benefited him
(05:14):
more than her. Hey, Tiffany, good morning, Good morning, Tiffany.
You just heard it Kiki's court. What do you think.
Speaker 5 (05:22):
I think that it role models bad behavior to the
children to allow this man back into the house. Not
only did he leave, but he brought the nanny who
had so much support to these children out of these
children's flying.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
That's true if you.
Speaker 5 (05:40):
Turn around and then say, oh, because he's sick, everything's
magically better when these children grow up, or are they
going to think a partner can do whatever they want
and walk all over them, but when they're sick it's
magically better.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
Yeah, Tiffany, he put a lot of stuff ahead of
his family already. And it's not to say you can't
forgive someone, but how much forgiven to you offer in
favor of your peace of mind?
Speaker 6 (06:03):
Right?
Speaker 2 (06:03):
And then she's in a new relationship, how does her
partner feel about this?
Speaker 1 (06:06):
Yeah, when he's going to move back in the house,
and she's trying to move on with her life based
on circumstances that that that more more than not he
presented exactly. I mean, look, people, you know fractures in
relationships are caused by both people. But it doesn't give
you the right to cheat. Doesn't give you a right
to cheat with the nanny. No, it doesn't give you
a right to ignore your children and family and your
obligations until you get sick and then now you need
(06:28):
them right and you.
Speaker 5 (06:31):
Will be forced to participate as a caretaker. The children
will be forced to very outside of their world of
child the children.
Speaker 1 (06:39):
Yeah, I agree. Thank you, Tiffany, have a great day,
thanks for calling being part of the thirteen. Hey Lewis,
good morning, Welcome. How are you done, Lewis, you're going
through something like this, I'm sorry to hear it.
Speaker 6 (06:50):
So my ex wife, she we went to a really
bad divorce, but I wanted up but so custody of
my son and I actually brought it back to for
child support in the midst of sport. She shows up
one day and I'm like, she's in a hospital and
why not say stage four cancer, she's now terminal. But
(07:11):
for the previous five years. She had no inclination to
be regular in her son's life. So a part of
me would like screw her, but then a part of
me said, okay, well it's still his mom. But at
the end of the day, I think it's really calmer,
Like you don't get to come along now that you're
sick and realize you messed up in life if you
(07:32):
weren't there for your children. You know, you made your choice.
Now you got to deal with it, whether you're dying
or not. I mean, I wish you the best, but
like now, I don't force my son to go see
his mother. If he wants to hear her, then yeah,
that's his choice. He's a little bit older now, but
it still affects him emotionally immensely. So the toilet takes
(07:52):
on your child is it's hard to watch them go
through that.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
Yeah, yeah, I'm Lewis. I'm sorry you're going through it
and thanks for thanks for sharing. Lewis. See, the hard
part is like somehow the person who wants to do
right is the person who winds up feeling the most guilty. Yes,
and I'm not going like I'm being vague because it's
not really well for me to talk about. But I
(08:18):
can relate to this situation not romantically but familiar, familiarly
when someone's sort of an outcast and they earned it,
they earn they earned the right to be an outcast.
And then something happens and and what's interesting is instantly
I start to feel guilty, like, well, what would the
what's the right thing to do here? Well, the right
thing to do here I suppose based on you know,
(08:40):
I don't know general the general rule would be that
you you let all your stuff go to help the
person who's in need. But then, honestly, you have to
circle back and then say to yourself, did this person
make any effort when they were well? Nor did this
person contribute when they were well?
Speaker 6 (08:56):
No?
Speaker 1 (08:57):
And what is the cost to me? You know what
I'm saying, like, like, what did my relationship with this person
do to me? How hard have I had to work
to get past it? And why should I have to
give up on all that work to make sure that
you feel better? For what? For this? For this floating
concept of what's right right? You can try and try
and try, and you're gonna get the same results. At
(09:18):
what point do you just give up even when it's
a sad situation and not have to feel bad about it.
Speaker 2 (09:23):
It has to be hard because you you think about
who this person was when they were on their feet,
when he was healthy, and he wasn't a great guy, right,
And so it's like, what if I sacrifice my new relationship,
my piece, my happiness and try to help help you
get through this, then you get back on your feet
and show my kids again that you don't love them
or you don't really support them.
Speaker 7 (09:43):
You know.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
It's like pie in the face twice.
Speaker 2 (09:45):
Yeah, I'm like, girl, you got to put yourself first.
And I know it's going to be hard, and God
for I hope he beats his situation.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
No one wishing, yeah, you know.
Speaker 8 (09:53):
But.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
I would be like, now, this is the opportunity for
you to show that you are truly a changed person,
not when you're and it's your you know, yeah the bottom.
Speaker 1 (10:02):
Yeah, no, go ahead.
Speaker 4 (10:03):
I'm just more heated than I was five minutes ago,
because now that I think about it, he's looking for
a caregiver, which a lot of listeners have said too
as well.
Speaker 1 (10:09):
But the's scared undred percent.
Speaker 4 (10:12):
But didn't he break those vows like when he cheated,
and when he moved down, he did all of this. So,
like they say, what it well through sickness and through health, right, yeah,
I think that's what they say. I don't even know
what I'm here health and took to do not with him,
but has to my own volt. He broke his vowels
and he cheated, left his family. Now he wants his
(10:32):
family back, and he wants a caregiver. And it's typical
as women, we always have to be expected to care
for others. So I'm proud of her for standing her ground,
and I.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
Hope she doesn't go back and let him in the house.
And I do think you have to People may disagree
with him, but I do think you have to ask
the question would he have done this otherwise? And based
on his previous behavior, The answer is no, no, Based
on his previous behavior, he would have put himself first,
and he still is in doing this. By the way,
this has nothing to do with her and nothing to
do with his kids. This has to do with his
fear and his regret and and and his selfishness. And
(11:02):
I know that's a horrible thing to say about somebody
who's sick, but I think that's your answer is, would
he have come to this conclusion short of it being
a very scary situation, and based on what you're telling me,
he never would have now.
Speaker 2 (11:16):
And I think the nanny would have never left. She
was happy living a life with him. But the moment
he lost his job and he was down on his luck,
she got right up out of there. Yeah, and now
he's looking.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
At well there you go. Yeah, so that he gave
it all up for her and that didn't work out. Angelica, Hi, Hi,
good morning guys. Hey, what do you want to say?
Good morning? Thanks for listening. By the way, of course,
I think.
Speaker 7 (11:41):
You guys are all on the right track. I think
everyone's in agreement, and not to say because we're all
best people and we don't wish well on this guy
who's you know, doing horrible. But like going back to
the whole vows that you're married, they're divorced, and he's
no longer her obligation.
Speaker 8 (12:01):
She's moved on. She's moved on. He's definitely made it
clear that he's moved on. And going back to what
Rufio said, I think the best case scenario would be
you know, fine, you don't I can't take care of you,
but I'll bring the kids to you wherever you may be.
Speaker 1 (12:22):
But see again and kid. Yeah, and I'm sorrying to
rupt you, but like, based on the story that I
just heard the way that I understand it from Kiki,
she was never preventing him from seeing his kids. He
was choosing not to because he was absent and you know,
the best he could do is a FaceTime because he
was too busy with the nanny or whatever. He was
putting everybody else first. And so I agree with you,
But again, it's not as though she was saying, you
(12:42):
can't see the kids and now they now she can.
He was always open to see the kids. He just
didn't do it right.
Speaker 8 (12:50):
And depending on how old the kids are, maybe give.
Speaker 1 (12:53):
Them that option. Yeah, yeah, I mean yeah right, just
a song, just a song, but again, a very adult
thing to put on children. Hey, do you want to
see your absent minded father because he's dying right Well,
they're going to say yes because that's because that seems
like the right thing to do. But after how many
attempts do we then put our own piece first? Is
(13:13):
my question? And I feel like we're beyond the point
of putting our own peace first. Because you know, God
forbid me. I don't wan anything bad to happen to
this guy. But you bring him back into your life
and he does all the same stuff all over again
that he's been doing, and then he tears you guys
all down again and you got to rebuild all simply
because something bad happened to him. So it's part for
(13:34):
the course, it's more about him. Yeah, right, you know, right,
And I'm.
Speaker 8 (13:39):
On my own journey of boundaries, so I think everyone
should set boundaries at some point. But it's hard.
Speaker 1 (13:46):
So yeah, I know it's hard, right because you feel
like the bad person because the right thing and I'm
doing the air quotes thing. The right thing to do
is always to forgive and get people what they need
because they're going through a hard time. It's like, but
at what point is that no longer the right thing?
Because you you you've you've done enough that I don't
have to consider the right thing anymore. That's a hard
question to answer. But Angelica, good luck to you, thanks
(14:06):
for calling. Thank you all right, So Kiki decided there
it is.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
I just want to I mean, I'm telling you I
was stressed over the weekend.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
I felt.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
That's how that's a hard one, but girl, you got
to put yourself first. I'm sorry, that's a hard one.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
The Space, yeah,
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